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Seeking My Purpose In The World

by The Sleepless Beholder

Chapter 22: Chapter 22: Just A Fake

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A month had passed since they started this training, and Celestia was happy to see that Sunset was beginning to show a little bit of progress.
The radius of the burning heat had been reduced, and the usually flailing flames were now calmer around her. She still would burn everything around her, if there were anything to burn, but it was a start.
Luna told her that their own training had also showed slow but continuous progress, but she also mentioned something that had her worried.
Sunset seemed to be running low on energy after using her magic, drinking unhealthy amounts of coffee to keep up, which would be understandable considering the amount of effort she had to put on her training, but Sunset should be able to handle it.
She had been training her magic since she became her pupil and seemed to excel at it only second to Twilight due to her cutie mark.
She wondered if ‘Sunshine’ had something to do with it, but from what she could deduce of what Luna told her about Nightmare Moon, Sunset should be more powerful than before. Something that she feared greatly but had no other option if she wanted Sunset to heal.
Or as much as she could heal by herself.
Her thoughts were interrupted as the fire around Sunset turned violent once again and she noticed that she had collapsed on the ground.
She quickly casted her spell, blocking Sunset’s magic which extinguished the flames, allowing for the cold air and snow to take over their surroundings once more.
She ran towards her and checked if she was okay, and surprisingly she was still conscious.

“Can we have a coffee machine installed in the carriage?” the unicorn asked while getting on her back in the snow.

Celestia made a magical bubble appear around them that protected them from the cold and snow. “I will see to it for our next session,” she said with a smile.

Sunset closed her eyes, trying to get a little bit of rest. “Can I ask you something?”

Celestia tried to give her a bit more warmth with her wings. “Of course.”

“You said that our immunity to fire came from our cutie marks. What does it mean exactly? I always thought they just represented what you were good at, but apparently they can give you a power that represents it?”

Celestia got closer to her. “The full extent of what a cutie mark is and represents is more of a philosophical theory, but there are a few things that had been discovered with studies.
The most common type of cutie mark represents a job preference, or a skill a pony can do without much effort. But a less common type are the ones that represent a much broader type of talent. This is the case with Rainbow Dash, who’s cutie mark representing the broad concept of speed allows her to be naturally much faster than the regular pegasus, and she could probably reach even beyond that. That would be her ‘power’ as you put it.
Cadence is also a case of this. With her talent being simply ‘love’, she has access to a wide variety of spells that no other pony can do.”
Celestia looked at Sunset’s cutie mark. “And rarer types of cutie mark, are the ones like mine, Luna’s, Twilight’s or yours. The ones that represent something that already has a lot of power in the world. The sun, the night, magic, and in your case, fire.
These kind of cutie marks are the ones that give special skills that if well trained, can easily put a pony between the most powerful in Equestria.”

Sunset opened her eyes to look at her. “Is that why you chose me as your pupil?”

Celestia made herself a simple yet difficult question; Truth or lie?

Lie.

“Yes, I knew you had potential and hoped that my teachings would help you become a great mage.”

“It didn’t go too well, did it?” Sunset said with a bit of pain.

Truth or lie?

Truth.

“It certainly wasn’t what I hoped, but I still want you to be better and achieve your dreams.”

Those words got Sunset thinking. Could she still claim her dream of becoming an alicorn? To rule beside Celestia or even take her place? Did she really deserve it? “Can I ask you a question?”

Celestia noticed her unrest, and worried about the question. “Of course.”

Sunset tried to move away from her mentor, her voice heavy with guilt and shame. “You saw me entering the restricted section of the library, right?”

Celestia pulled her closer to her. “I did.”

Tears began to spill out of Sunset’s eyes. “I never got to tell you before…” She gave a heavy sob. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. You trusted me and I threw it all away. It was stupid. I should’ve been patient. Maybe then…” Sunset closed her eyes, tears running down her face. “Maybe then you wouldn’t have needed to replace me.”

Truth or lie?

Lie.

“Sunset, I never wanted to replace you.”

Truth.

She hugged Sunset closer to her. “I was disappointed, but I ended up committing far worse mistakes than yours. I should’ve taught you the dangers of that temptation instead of just blocking you from it.”

Sunset still rejected the hug, not feeling like she deserved it. “But I did it again when Twilight became your student. I didn’t learn my lesson.”

Truth.

“You didn’t learn your lesson because I was a terrible teacher. But now I want to fix that. For you and for Twilight.” Celestia spoke in a soft voice. “You and me both made mistakes, born from our ignorance, pride, obliviousness, and impatience. But I want to leave that in the past and start anew. To nurture you like I should have done from the beginning.”
Sunset didn’t respond, her tears kept falling and she remained looking away from her.
Celestia understood what words she needed to hear. She lifted her up from the ground, holding her against her chest in a tight hug. “Sunset, it’s okay. I forgive you.”

Sunset finally returned the hug, tears still running down her face. “I do too.”


“Spells that no other pony can do she says,” Nightmare muttered as she examined the incomplete papers talking about Cadence’s spell to show the emotions and connections of ponies, filling some of the blanks to reconstruct the spell and learn how to cast it. It was proving difficult, but certainly possible. “But I am no pony.”

“What are you?”

“The same as you dear sister. The magical manifestation of a desire.” She glanced down at the barrier. “Do you want to know more about your nature? There are a lot of things I can teach you.”

“I will get answers on my own.”

Nightmare rolled her eyes. “I respect your pride, but you should’ve realized by now that you will need me to defeat Celestia.”

“I have everything I need already.”

Nightmare returned her attention to the floor. “Really? Because if I’m not mistaken, your fire magic is useless against her. But my magic will-”

“You’re a fool.”

Nightmare glared at the floor. “Excuse you?”

“Do you think Sunset is the only one with magical knowledge? The only ‘seasoned and sharp mind’ as you called it?”

The barrier around Nightmare turned red, and she could feel a huge strain being put on it. The paper she was writing in was suddenly pulled against it.

“Celestia’s immunity to fire is just magic. All magic can be countered. Dispelled. Modified. Learned.”

Bright red markings started to appear on the paper, completing the spell in just a couple of seconds.

“Unlike you, I didn’t waste my time of imprisonment waiting for the stars to align. My preparations have already been made; I will have no problem turning Celestia into ash.”

‘I may have been underestimating her.’ Nightmare took the paper from the barrier, studying the now completed spell. “Don’t get too overconfident. An alicorn is much more capable and powerful than any unicorn can ever be.”

“Tell that to King Sombra.”


Moon Dancer glanced off her book to look at Sunset. “You know, if the day we first met somepony had told me that you would cook dinner for me, I would’ve thought it was a cruel joke.”

An apron-wearing Sunset looked back at her. “How weird are the turns life takes, don’t you agree?”

“Completely. And I’m happy for you. You seem to be enjoying life a lot more now.” Sunset smiled and returned to her cooking, but after a few seconds she turned the stove off and put the half-prepared food aside.
Moon Dancer looked at her with a bit of worry. “Is something wrong?”

“We’re eating outside of this tower,” Sunset declared, throwing her apron away.

“W-what?” Moon Dancer stammered in surprise.

“Come on, you said you rarely go out, let’s go buy some food we can carry around and explore Canterlot. I’m sure we can find something interesting to do.” Sunset pulled the book away from Moon Dancer’s hooves.

“But… I…” The bookworm unicorn stammered.

“Come on, it will be fun, I promise,” Sunset pleaded, and with a heavy sigh, Moon Dancer finally accepted.

Sunset raised her hoof in celebration. “Yay, you won’t regret it!”


The two mares walked around Canterlot, a pizza box floating between them as they explored the city.

“Hey, I can see the school from here!” Sunset pointed out with her slice of pizza. “How was your time there?”

Moon Dancer looked at the ancient brick building with a bit of sadness. “It was… okay.”

Sunset raised an eyebrow. “Why? Weren’t you one of the best in the class?”

“Yeah, but…” Moon Dancer trailed off, taking a bite of her pizza to extend the silence a bit more.

Sunset put her pizza back in the box and looked at her friend. “Hey, it’s okay. Remember what we talked about trust? You can tell me the truth.”

Moon Dancer thought about it for a moment before giving a heavy sigh. “Remember when you told me that you didn’t feel like you were learning anymore?” Sunset nodded. “Well, I feel the exact opposite. I keep reading book after book, learning about science, magic, history, economics, pottery, but I feel like it’s never enough, that I will be underprepared for when I need to put my studies to the test.” She looked at Sunset, her stress clear in her face. “I don’t think I can be like you and Twilight and just go out and succeed. You even tried it and di-” Moon Dancer put a hoof over her mouth immediately.

Sunset gave her a reassuring smile. “Maybe you should aim lower than ‘saving Equestria from eternal night’ and think about becoming a professor or something like that.”

Moon Dancer looked away a little embarrassed. “Yeah, it’s just… Twilight is kind of a role model for me.”

Sunset chuckled. “The copycat manestyle gives it away.” The yellow unicorn’s hoof was trying to hide her mane before she even thought about it. “Still, maybe you should choose one career and dedicate yourself to it instead of just trying to absorb all the knowledge of Equestria.”

Moon Dancer rolled her eyes and huffed. “Like if that’s stopping Twilight from doing it and save Equestria in her free time.”

“Well, she doesn’t do it alone. She has friends that help her.” She put a hoof over Moon Dancer’s shoulder. “And if I remember correctly, you have three friends from that school over there. They may not be the elements of harmony, but I’m sure they can help you look for a better future than an endless cycle of studies. And of course, you will have my full support on whatever you decide.”

Moon Dancer smiled. “Thanks Sunset, I really appreciate it.”

Sunset gave her a big smile and offered her another slice of pizza before they continued their walk.


Nightmare looked at her host’s mind-projection and tried casting Cadence’s spell.
The little avatar changed colors, and she saw a new string being pulled by an orange aura that tried to extend it over to Moon Dancer, but the string snapped halfway to her, and the aura dissipated.
Nightmare chuckled. “Isn’t it a little cruel to keep teasing her with success like that?” she asked sarcastically.

“It wasn’t me.”

Nightmare looked down, raising an eyebrow. “Who is it then?”

“She does it to herself.”

“And why exactly?”

“Who cares? She doesn’t deserve friends anyway.”

Nightmare smiled. “If that were true, why were you going to make a connection with her? And by request of Celestia no less.” There was a long pause, but Nightmare kept waiting for her to cave in and admit her mistake.

“It was my choice.”

Nightmare returned to her studies, trying to hide her frustration at the answer. “Soon you will realize that there is no choice for you to make. The end will always be the same.”


The unicorn’s aimless walk through Canterlot had led them to the dark alleys of the city, where the shadier type businesses took place.
Moon Dancer always wanted to explore this part of the city, but she knew she would be mugged or worse. However, now she had Celestia’s semi-immortal pupil at her side, so she had nothing to fear.
The reason as to why she wanted to explore this place was a rumor she had heard in the library, of a curio shop that supposedly contained all kinds of ‘questionable’ artifacts and ‘controversial’ knowledge.
When they eventually found said shop, she busted in and quickly started looking around, hoping to find a real book of necromancy.
While she did this, Sunset walked up to the shopkeeper, who looked at her through his small glasses with a smile.

“May I help you travelers?” the stallion asked in a typical I’m-selling-you-a-cursed-relic-merchant type of voice.

“We’re here just to browse your wears,” Sunset responded looking at what the shopkeeper had behind his desk.

“Creatures usually come here looking for something powerful or forbidden,” the stallion said, getting behind the counter.

Sunset was about to roll her eyes, not believing that actual dangerous artifacts would be sold under the nose of the royal guard, but she saw something that caught her attention. “What’s that?”

The shopkeeper looked at the article she was pointing at and smiled. “Ah, you have a keen eye. The Alicorn Amulet is one of the most mysterious and powerful of all the known magical charms.”

“I read about it,” Moon Dancer said while browsing a pile of books. “It’s a cursed item. It corrupts the mind of its user the more you use it. You would need to have a very strong willpower for it to not take control over you.”

“It is indeed. That’s why it’s just for show, I could never sell it to a pony easy to corrupt,” the shopkeeper said trying to sound like he was bearing a heavy burden.

“It must be just a fake. That thing wou- YES!” Moon Dancer screamed lifting an ominous looking book from the pile.

The shopkeeper instantly smiled and almost ran to her, exited for the possible sell. “I see that you found what you were looking for.”

Sunset stared at the amulet in its pedestal, and giving a quick glance to the distracted shopkeeper, she teleported it to herself.
‘This has to be a fake. How could something like this be right here? Although, it would probably be the last place the guard would look for.’
She lighted up her horn and casted an identifying spell on it.
‘If it really is the Alicorn Amulet, it should- ‘

“You’re right little sun. It’s nothing but a fake charm to fool less intelligent ponies. Now put it back. For now.”

Sunset immediately forgot about the voice talking to her, but she was now sure that the amulet was fake, so she returned it to the pedestal and went back with Moon Dancer, who was walking excitedly to the exit with her new book floating behind her.


Sunset had decided to do a sleepover in Moon Dancer’s tower, but even after they stayed awake until the late hours of the night, sleep avoided her once again.
She thought she would finally feel a connection with her unicorn ‘friend’, but it seemed like that glass wall was still holding her back.
“Maybe I should go back to Ponyville for a while, see what else I can learn. It has been two months since I left. I wonder what the girls have been up to, what kind of disaster has struck the town recently. I also would love to get some of Savoir’s coffee.” She then remembered something. “Oh right, the crusaders! I hope they aren’t still waiting.” She laughed nervously. “I should go see them first.”
She remained awake for another hour until she finally fell asleep, and once again, she slept without any dreams that the lunar princess could visit.

Author's Notes:


Sunset's morale has gone up!: +20

Current morale: 55/100

Sunset developed a new condition: Insomnia.


Although Moon Dancer’s curiosity for the occult in this story is just a little ongoing joke I made for fun, (But knowing my volatile inspiration it will probably turn into a mayor plot point in a few chapters) would you be interested in another story were Moon Dancer goes full necromancer (not necessarily the evil kind)?

Have a nice existence.

I will be watching you.

Next Chapter: Chapter 23: I Hate Winter Estimated time remaining: 6 Hours, 11 Minutes
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