‘I didn’t realize how much I missed flying,’ Sunset thought as she flew towards Canterlot.
It was a very relaxing activity for her. It required concentration, but still let her feel like she was untied from the rest of the world.
She looked up at the sky above, wondering just how higher she could go. How far away from the rest of Equestria could she get.
‘I don’t think I would’ve minded too much if I was born a pegasus. But not having magic would be pretty bad.’
She finally reached Canterlot castle and landed on one of its platforms, dispelling her wings before looking at her brother walking up to her.

“Glad to see you again,” he said before they shared a hug.

“You didn’t tell Cadence that I was coming, right?” Sunset asked with worry.

“I didn’t, as I promised. Although I’m kind of curious why you want to show up unannounced. It’s not like she would turn you away.”

“I’ve my reasons.” Sunset looked away from him. “But they are starting to sound more stupid by the second.”

Shining hugged her with one of his forelegs. “Hey, if you think that they will help, they are not stupid. And as I told you, we’re all here to help you.”

Sunset sighed and leaned closer to her brother, feeling safer with him so close to her. “Thanks Bigby. These past days have been a lot to handle.”

“I can only imagine.” He guided her out of the platform, and they started walking towards Cadence’s house.

“Are things still as boring as ever?” Sunset asked to change the mood a little.

Shining smiled. “Yep. I wouldn’t mind another mission from Celestia’s pupil.”

Sunset chuckled and rubbed her chin in thought. “Where could I send you?”

“Could the mission involve Cadence and a nice tourist location to spend a couple of days in?”

Sunset laughed. “I don’t think I can pull that many strings.” She looked at him with a sly smile. “Bigby, can I ask you a serious question?”

Shining didn’t suspect a thing. “Ask away.”

Her smile grew larger. “When are you going to marry Cadence?”

The captain of the guard stumbled his steps. “It’s too soon to answer that.”

“Oh come on! You two know each other since the Academy. I’ve no doubt she would say yes.”

Shining raised his head to protect his dignity. “Still, I want it to be the perfect moment.”

Sunset smiled again with more wickedness. “So, until your mother and/or Cadence get impatient and drag you to an altar by force?”

Shining looked at her with a raised eyebrow. “Isn’t the elder sibling the one supposed to do the teasing?”

Sunset chuckled. “I still claim to be older than you.”

His brother rolled his eyes but couldn’t hide his smile. “I now know how Twily felt growing up.”

Sunset laughed. “Hey, I’m teasing you with a good thing.” Then another thought came to her head. “I should start calling Cadence my future sister-in-law.”

“Don’t you dare!”

The two kept talking and laughing, quickly making their way towards Cadence’s home.
Just like Twilight, Cadence had her own tower in the castle to live in, but since she had a royal title, her tower was attached to the rest of the structure.
As they reached the heavy double doors, Sunset’s previous laughter and playfulness with her brother started to be replaced with doubts and dread.
“I… I don’t think this was a good idea.” She said trying to turn around and leave but Shining stopped her.

“Hey, you’re already here. Cadence won’t bite you.”

Sunset tried to move him away. “It’s stupid. I shouldn’t drag her down with this.”

Shining hugged her softly. “It’s okay Sunset. Cadence will help you. You know it, that’s why you wanted to come in the first place. You’ve nothing to be worried about.”

Sunset took some air to try and calm herself before stepping back from her brother. “You’re right. I just…” She looked at the tower. “I don’t know.”

“Well, you won’t know until you try, right?”

Sunset sighed and knocked on the doors with her hoof. “Come in!” a voice responded.
She looked back at Shining, who gave her a reassuring smile, and entered the tower.
Closing the door behind her, she looked around, noticing that the tower looked pretty much the same as she remembered as a filly. However, she couldn’t see the pink alicorn coming to greet her.
“Cadence?” Sunset asked, and a noise came from her room upstairs. She slowly ascended to the upper floor, trying to hear some response from the alicorn, but the house seemed to be empty.
She reached the room, finding it as abandoned as the rest of the house, yet she knew somepony was here. She had heard Cadence respond to her knocking, but it was somewhat muffled to hear it clearly. Maybe there was another pony?
As she wondered what was happening, a figure descended from the ceiling, silently stepping behind her until her wings reached her, and they started to mercilessly tickle her.
Sunset fell to the floor in a fit of laughter trying in vain to escape the downy attack.

“How’s the little ball of mischief doing?” Cadence asked with a smile as she continued tickling her.

“Stop! Please!” Sunset begged with a smile between laughs, not doing a good job at resisting the alicorns actions.

The alicorn faked an evil laugh. “I don’t think so. I haven’t seen you in a while. We have so much to catch up on.”

“Stop or I will paint your coat black while you sleep!” Sunset warned her while pushing the wings away with her forelegs.

Cadence laughed. “You already did that one, remember?”

Sunset teleported herself onto the alicorn’s back, making them both fall to the floor. “I only did half of your body. I will paint the right side this time.”

Suddenly standing up and with a deft movement of her wings, Cadence threw Sunset to her bed. “Please don’t. It took ages to get that thing off my coat.”

Sunset quickly used the pillows to shield her ticklish sides. “You deserved it.”

Cadence walked up to the bed. “Because I made raspberries on your belly as a filly?”

“In front of the guards!” Sunset whined while throwing a pillow at Cadence’s head.

The alicorn removed the pillow from her face. “Remind me, was that before or after you put salt on my tea instead of sugar?”

Sunset rolled her eyes with a smile. “Oh, you know how deep that rabbit hole is. You sure you want to go there?”

“Honestly, it would be the highlight of the week.” Cadence jumped on the bed, facing Sunset and lowering her head until their noses almost touched. “So, what brings you to my domains Little Mischief?”

Sunset’s smile and excitement died a little as she remembered the motive of the visit.
Cadence noticed her shift in emotion and took a more serious stance. “Did something bad happen?”

Sunset sighed. “A lot of things. I asked Shining to not tell you anything.”

Cadence leaned her head to the side and spoke softly. “And why did you do that?”

The unicorn felt a little tremor shake her body. “Because… I feel like it will change things.”

Cadence was confused. “How? What things?”

“This. Our relationship. Little Mischief and Miss Pretty. It may have been born out of jealousy and competition to one-up each other, but… it’s the only way I’ve left to feel like a little filly again. And I don’t want to lose it.” Sunset didn’t realize, but tears were running down her face.

Cadence took Sunset out of her pillow pile and gave her a warm hug with both legs and wings. “Sunset, just like Twilight will always be that Nerd Muffin little filly I sited for so long, you will always be the Little Mischief that made my days both frustrating and fun. You’re a grown mare now, but I also have the wanting of relieving those old days of young happiness.”

Sunset hugged her back, enjoying the feeling of comfort she gave her. She really hoped to keep this pillar of happiness in the middle of such a hard time in her life.
The hug continued for many minutes, until Sunset finally let go, slowly, and looked at her with worry. “No pony has told anything about me, right?”

Cadence shook her head. “The last thing I knew about you was that you left to Ponyville with Twilight. Is that what the problem is? Did you two have a fight?”

“Not exactly.” Sunset tried to dry her tears, but more kept coming. “I had a talk with the eldest of the Apple family in Ponyville, and she told me that sometimes one can lie to themselves about what affects you, and that family can help you see the truth. And I reasoned that maybe that was what has been stopping me from forming a connection and make friends.” Sunset looked at Cadence. “So, I thought that telling you, a pony that both knows me but is completely unaware of what has transpired, can give me that kind of truth. Which sounds stupid the more I think about it.”

Cadence put a hoof over Sunset’s. “I don’t think it’s stupid. And if it can help you, I will gladly listen to you.”

Sunset couldn’t help but sob. “Can you hold me while I tell you?”

“Of course.” Cadence not only hugged her, she also moved the blankets and pillows to cover them both, adding to the feeling of being warm and protected.

“It all started the night of Nightmare Moon’s return.”

Cadence held Sunset close while she started to talk. “Celestia… lied to me. When she took Twilight as her pupil, I felt like she was replacing me. And I was right.”

“I could see it a little in how you always seemed happy to prank us, but you never took it too far. But why would Celestia lie to you?”

“There was something more. She thought that I was… that I am… Or at least think I am…” Sunset’s body shook violently, but Cadence hugged her tighter, so she knew she was safe with her. “A monster.”

Cadence snorted, trying to keep a calm atmosphere. “Why would you think something as ridiculous as that?”

“I…” Sunset’s tears seemed to double their efforts to escape her eyes. “I hurt Twilight.”

Cadence suppressed her shock, keeping a reassuring smile for Sunset. “Did a prank go too far?”

Sunset shook her head. “I lost control of myself.”

Cadence frowned a little in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Sunset didn’t respond, she remained silent for a couple of seconds before talking again. “Have you ever heard of ponies cheating death?”

Cadence’s feared the direction that the conversation was taking. “I’ve actually. Aunty Luna is capable of it.”

Sunset shifted uncomfortably. “Well… I sort of… can do it too.”

Cadence used a lot of her willpower to keep her composure. “You mean you have died and come back to life?”

“Three times,” she simply responded.

Cadence thought of a way of shining a more positive light on the revelation. “I’m sure that you did it being a hero. Like you always wanted to be when you were little.”

Sunset managed to smile a little at the memory, but it didn’t last long. “Only the first two. The last one…”

Cadence waited for her to say it, preparing herself to remain calm.
“I got angry. Really angry. Angry at Twilight’s friends. At Twilight… I said a horrible thing to her. And… trying to calm me down… I hurt her. But it wasn’t just an accident. I wanted to hurt her more. To hurt all her friends. And… I’m not sure if I would’ve stopped there.”

Cadence couldn’t believe what she was hearing, but still remained calm. “Sunset, that doesn’t sound like you. Are you sure you were just angry?”

Sunset’s body shook violently. “It was… kind of welled up for some time. Various things happened in quick succession. And apparently my anger it’s what brings me back to life. I died not long before I hurt Twilight.”

Cadence hugged her tightly. “Then you weren’t in your right mind at the time. Everypony does and says bad things when they lose their temper. As I said, that pony that you’re describing doesn’t sound like the Sunset I know.”

“But it was.” Sunset’s body shook once more. “And I’m too dangerous when it happens. I burn things around me, I hurt a dragon with fire magic, I melt rock, and I cooked Twilight’s skin just by standing close to her.”

Cadence kept fighting to keep herself calm. “Well, I’m sure we can find a solution to control it.”

Sunset trembled, the topic she knew would change everything being finally inescapable. “At the time, I could only think about one solution.” She hugged Cadence with all her strength, like if the alicorn would disappear when she said the words. “I teleported myself to a river, made it boil with my body heat alone, and… and I… drowned myself.” Sunset couldn’t stop herself; it was like if the floodgates had been opened. “That was my third death, and my first too. And now I can’t even drink a glass of water without freaking out, and I’m constantly scared that I will lose control again and burn everything and everypony around me. I don’t know if Celestia was right in calling me a monster. My rage could turn me into one and I can’t control it because it happens when I die and-”

Cadence pulled Sunset’s head against hers, holding her in a more loving manner, an almost motherly way, and despite the raging conflict of emotions inside her, she spoke with a soft, caring, soothing voice. “You’re not a monster. You’re Little Mischief. A pony with dreams of heroism and fame that nopony can stop once she tries to do something. There is no bet that you couldn’t win. You never backed down from any challenge. And this is just another obstacle that you will surpass. Because you’ve always done everything on your own, but now you have a family, and soon friends that will help you. No matter what you did, I know, from the bottom of my heart, that you will grow to be one of the most amazing and important ponies that Equestria has ever seen.”

Sunset looked at her, tears flowing down her face, and lessened the force of her hug.
She didn’t disappear. She still saw her as Little Mischief. She still believed in her.
They continued hugging each other for what felt like and eternity that was still too short. Sunset continued crying, letting all her pent-up feelings flow out of her.
Cadence was still keeping a calm face, but in her mind, she was thinking and dissecting each of Sunset’s words.
‘She needs to find a way to control her emotions. Once she has control of her anger, she can feel safer around ponies. I’m sure Twilight doesn’t hold a grudge against her, but maybe she needs more than that. A direct reassurance that her sister believes that she wasn’t to blame for her injuries. Twilight’s friends… I may need to talk to them. Or maybe just consult Twilight about the issue. They may have a different look on the event. I definitely need to talk with Celestia about this “replacement” she feels. The failure to connect with ponies…’
She gently pushed Sunset away from her. “Can I try something? To see if I can discern what stops you from connecting with ponies.”

Sunset rubbed her eyes to dry her tears. “Of course. What do you need?”

“Just stay calm and hold still, this may feel a bit weird.” Cadence lowered her horn until it touched Sunset’s, forming a magical connection between the two.
Using this connection, her magic entered Sunset’s body, feeling a little bit of instinctual resistance by her own magic, but since Sunset trusted her, she could pull through and reach her core. There she used her special magic to activate her spell.
Once she did this, she lifted her head, and saw Sunset in a different way. She could see her emotions in her body, and the magical strings that connected her with her loved ones.
Cadence’s calm and reassuring face turned into one of complete horror.

“Is it that bad?” Sunset asked with worry.

Her body looked sick with overwhelming feelings.
Purple fear ascended from her legs like a viscus and rotten disease.
Blue sadness dripped from eyes completely green with shame.
A strong sense of anxiety and stress seemed to creep down from her head and threaten to keep expanding.
And the anger she said she had. She could see it expanding along her body like a severe infection that pulsated with the will of consuming her body completely.
But that wasn’t what horrified her.

“How bad is it?” Sunset insisted, tears returning to her cheeks.

The strings connecting Sunset with her loved ones looked so thin and fragile that a simple breeze could sever them with ease.
But the real problem, was the one string that she had always argued was the most important.
There was no string connecting Sunset… with Sunset.

“What’s wrong with me?!”

Sunset had absolutely no love for herself.

“Can I fix it?!”

‘Fix it? I never thought that it could even be possible. Weak strings can be strengthened, even broken strings can be fixed with time and effort. But having a string missing? Especially one as important as the one that signifies the love you have for your own person? The thing that prevents you from actively seeking to destroy yourself? It’s impossible. Even ponies that hurt themselves or take their own life have broken strings because they once loved themselves. But not having one would mean that you never, even as a newly born, had any love for yourself, and you only desired your own destruction.’
Cadence saw the infection of anger grow in Sunset, reaching her eyes and blinding them with rage.
She snapped herself out of her trance too late. The unicorn pounced on her and held her forcefully against the bed. She could feel the unnatural heat coming from her hooves, singeing her coat.

“Tell me what’s wrong!” she demanded, and Cadence could see the colors continue to shift inside her. The sadness fighting the anger in her eyes, making her cry despite her rage.

“Tell me that it can be fixed!” She screamed, and a shiver ran down Cadence’s spine as she saw the pink mass of stress and anxiety descend through the back of her head while fear crept up from her legs.

“We can fix it!” she screamed in desperation.

“How?!” Sunset shouted with a fury Cadence had never seen, but the pink and purple colors continued to move through her body, slowly reaching the spot where the strings originated from.

“We will…” Cadence couldn’t finish the sentence. She had no idea how to even start fixing something she had thought was impossible. She had to lie, but it was already too late. The pink and purple moved faster now. “Sunset you need to calm down! We will find a solution! Between Celestial, Luna Twilight and I, we will help you feel whole again. You will have friends, you will have a loving family, you will live a happy life, you will-”
Cadence watched in horror as the pink and purple finally reached Sunset’s heart, fusing with each other in a volatile mix.

All the colors shut down at once, and Sunset collapsed on the bed.

Author's Notes:

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Sunset suffered a heart attack.

Sunset’s morale plummeted: -100

Current morale: -80/100

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I will be watching you.