Author's Notes:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1FnEWVC_YgJPu7hdg6fHLI9N7aztLlf7y9XGh3fZ_E94/edit

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From a quick look around the surface of the ship, I knew things had drastically changed. When we first obtained the place, the deck was flat aside from where the wheel house was located. Now, there were several warehouses with large doors facing both inward and outward, away from the ship. There was also a single warehouse in the center of the ship, which the teleport circle was right next to.

Large flying insects were carrying resources like logs, stones, and ores and dropping them off in the warehouses. There, ponies, changelings, and griffins separated everything into further categories. In front of each warehouse was a large wagon that was hooked up to a wood golem shaped like a pony. Drones were loading things into the back of some of the wagons.

“This is a pretty impressive setup,” I said. “You guys have done well.” The unnamed mare from the tower seemed to be having a small mental meltdown, but I ignored it.

“We had a lot of help from the water elementals, especially Flo,” Smiles said. “Apparently she was able to tap into your brain to think of some very interesting solutions to problems we were running into. The elementals also taught us how to properly maintain forests, which has given us the chance to obtain a lot of wood and stone. Metals are harder to come by, but we still get enough that we can have all kinds of fun.”

“...Flo tapped into my brain, huh? I guess I was working overtime in the coma. So, this is the resource collection point. Where do those wagons go?”

“To the central elevator,” Smiles said. “It’s in the warehouse here.” He led the way into the central warehouse. Silence had to poke the mare from the tower a few times to make her start absentmindedly following us.

“So, does this elevator shaft cover the whole ship?” I asked.

“You got it. The primary inner storehouses are located around the central shaft. We’re working on a basic rail system along the main hallways to help move things around faster. We don’t have enough craftsponies for it to be a problem right away, but Jak already has a few dozen minotaur runecrafters heading toward Canterlot to join us. If we don’t have the problem solved, it’ll turn into a real headache.”

“There are a bunch of openings on the side of the ship, as well,” I said. “Couldn’t you have separate elevators on the four corners that go up and down the side of the ship? As I see it, the larger problem is the bottleneck of this central warehouse. It’s not an issue right now, but when you add more crafters, it might become a bigger issue than the internal transport network. Adding more elevators also slightly reduces the need for the internal transport network.”

“I’ll raise that point at the next meeting,” Smiles said with a nod. “For now, I’d like to take you to see Jak. He has two presents for you.”

“Then let’s go see Jak.” We continued walking toward the main freight elevator. A few wagons were already waiting on it, but it was nowhere near capacity.

“We got a VIP guest,” Smiles called when we got to the center of the elevator. “Can we head down ahead of schedule?”

The elevator operator peered around the line of wagons to take a look at us. When he saw me, his eyes went wide. “Yes, of course!” he immediately replied. “Everypony clear, we’re going down!” With that, the elevator began slowly descending. “What floor would you like to visit?”

“We’re heading to sector three,” Smiles said.

“Sector three it is!”

The ride down was interesting. I expected there to be walls or doors blocking off site, but the elevator descended straight through large storehouses where we could see strange bugs and ponies moving resources to carts pulled by more wooden golems. The first layer had all the organic materials like wood and food. The second layer was full of stones and rocks. The third layer was where all the metal went, and where our elevator ground to a stop. Two of the golems pulling carts starting walking, ferrying their ore-laden wagons into the storehouse.

Smiles paid them no mind and started walking to one of the larger hallways. Sure enough, there were rail tracks that followed along the center of the hall. “Is there going to be enough walking space left once the rail cart is in place?” I asked.

“No, but we already have a system in place for it,” Smiles said. “The hallway is going to be broken off into segments. Before the rail cart can proceed into the next segment, the halls have to be cleared. Each workshop has its own smaller storehouse, so we usually only need to resupply everyone once a day.”

“How’s everyone getting along with the local bugs?”

“It took some getting used to for the ponies and the griffins. The changelings were wary of the giant ants at first, for some reason, but they’re working together now with no issue.”

“Good. Are there any problems I need to help solve?”

“The biggest issue is the lack of a name for the ship,” Smiles said. “Apparently some of the ex-pirates you hired from Atlantis wanted to name it after you and a lot of the crafters got on board, but it was vetoed from above.”

“Ah, that issue has been resolved,” I said, patting him on the head. “This town is now called Skyhold.”

“...Town? Not ship?”

“Indeed. It’s too big to be considered just a ship. I want to turn this into a thriving crafter’s city, a place where they can live and fly from city to city to sell their wares.”

“That’s… good news,” Smiles said. “A lot of the ponies here were worried this place would only be used for war…”

“It’s being used for war because we’re about to have one. And even then, you yourself just delivered some golems that were made for exploration, not combat. That means even now, it’s not just being used for war. I want this city to build things to enrich the lives of others, not just things to take lives away.”

“Well, Jak’s going to be very happy to hear that,” Smiles replied with a big grin. “You know, you’re actually starting to sound like a proper noble.”

“I should certainly hope so. After all, now I’m even nobler. Celestia’s promoting me to countess.”

That made his ears twitch. “Impressive! Although I suppose with your achievements, that’s not too surprising. So I guess this town is going to be your main territory?”

“I’m also building a town next to the Everfree, along with my university. Celestia found me a bunch of colonists and everything. That will be my main town, but Skyhold will also be a very important territory.”

“Well, I guess that can’t be helped. Still, Skyhold will be very helpful for building your town up. These bugs can make all kinds of buildings.”

“I’ll use them for future expansion. Right now, I want them to focus on gathering material for the crafters. Celestia and Moonbeam are providing building support.”

“Must be nice to have friends in high places. Are you sure they aren’t loaning you the support?”

“Any building support from the government is a loan, because eventually the government is going to collect taxes on it. And I’m sure Moonie will take payment from my body. I’m not too worried about it. Although I would like some of the colonists to work on the ship for a bit to learn. Or maybe have some of the crafters work in the town to teach.”

“I think Jak would be fine with either,” Smiles said. “You can ask him. He should be in… here.” We finally entered one of the workshops. There were several stands that held various types of golems. Jak was currently standing in front of one that seemed to have several modular limbs, each with a different set of runes. An assistant changeling was taking notes while the golem moved one of its arms around. “Master Jak?”

“Back already?” Jak said, turning his head our way. His eyes widened when he saw me. “Oh ho, fancy seein’ you here, little lassie!”

“I figured I had enough beauty sleep. I was hoping you made your favorite lady a lot of fun new toys. And I also had a gift.”

“A gift?” He finally turned to face us. The first one he stared at was the hornless unicorn mare. He looked her up and down for a moment before staring at the books. “Do you have knowledge that Athena doesn’t?”

“Maybe,” I said. “This mare here was previously one of the seven head mages of the tower at Canterlot. She now works for me. She happened to have some books that I thought you might like to see, all the books about runes that the tower possesses. This also includes the runes they use to keep the big rock floating above their tower.”

“Perfect!” he said with a wide grin. “That fills one of the biggest gaps we had! Not even Athena could find the runes for levitation! Please, set them over here.” He walked to a large table in the corner of the room. Silence set the books down in the open spaces. “We’ll have one of the elementals help us read through these later, as well as make copies. Seriously, what were those eggheads at the tower thinking? Knowledge like this should be spread as widely as possible, not kept hidden away!”

“...My mind is starting to be changed,” the mare said, her ears drooping. “The things I have seen in the mere few hours I have worked under Countess Navarone have most surely amazed me. I’m pleased that I took the chance on you.”

“So, are these modular golems?” I asked.

“Yep! With this kind of setup, we can mix and match various effects for various situations. What was once a combat golem could instantly be turned into a housekeeping golem. Modeling the body parts is easier this way, but there’s a loss in power between the modular parts and the main body when compared with normal golems. That’s what we’re working on now. But if you’re interested, I’ve got a special present for you.”

“I am,” I said. Please tell me it’s a golem I can use to replace Kat…

“Come along this way, then,” he said. “It’ll be a little walk, but I can tell you about our progress on the way.” He led the way into the hall and we all followed along behind. “Not you, Smiles! Take those books to the research team. Those nerds will dig through them faster than we can.” The named pony groaned and returned to the room.

“Before you get started talking, I figured you might be interested,” I said. “This town is now named Skyhold.”

“Skyhold, eh? I reckon that’ll do. Is that with or without an e at the end?”

“Without. Why make people write an extra letter for no reason? I had a plan for the ship after the war on Tartarus is over, if you’re interested.”

“Of course I am, lassie. All of your plans are exciting!”

“I plan to hire any craftsmen who are interested in working for me and letting them live here, traveling the world to find new materials, learn new techniques, sell everything they make, and help build up cities. I want to make this place famous enough that towns throw a festival when it flies through. Do you think that’s viable?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

“I’m sure if you let me spread the word, even more craftsmen will come now. And if you let me fly this tub to Minos, the entire city will pitch in to upgrade it. All of our tools are well made for ponies, but our output would increase significantly if we had the best equipment available. We can’t get that anywhere but Minos, and teleporting equipment that large would be difficult.”

“How long do you think it would take this ship to get there? You’d probably run out of supplies before even getting across the ocean.”

“Oh no, that won’t be a problem,” Jak said. “The warehouses you saw on the way down are only the freshest supplies. There’s more storage further in that everything gets distributed to. At the moment, we’re probably at fifteen to twenty percent capacity, which will last the current number of workers we have for a month. The goal is to be a third full by the time we get to Canterlot, where the princess will help load us up. Right now, we’re just experimenting to see what retains magic runes the best.”

“I saw a bunch of wooden golems on the way here,” I said.

“Most types of wood we’ve found don’t hold magic very well,” he said, shrugging his shoulders. “Because of that, the best you can really do is super basic motions. One of the griffin assistants figured it would be enough to walk, so we built a mockup wooden pony, used a few basic runes, and made it charge at Smiles. Unfortunately, they can’t move very quickly, but they can essentially move forever while pulling a decent amount of weight.”

“I can certainly see a market for something like that,” I said. “It’s not quite a car, but it’s a step in the right direction. What about stone?”

“That’s much better, depending on the type of stone. The more dense the stone, generally the more magic it can hold. But even relatively common stones can hold enough magic to make golems. They need to be hardened with extra runes and their performance is much lower than the metal golems, but they’re strong enough to take down a few platoons of ponies.”

“That’s not saying much,” Kat purred, quietly enough that only I could hear it.

“With hardening, how do they stand up to battle hammers or maces?”

“Depends on the quality of the weapon and the arm of the one swinging it. With hardening, iron weapons would damage the golem, but might break. Steel would definitely destroy one, but the weapon might get damaged. If I’m being downright honest, fielding a golem in battle against almost any of the races that exist right now is outright malicious. Changelings and griffins would be the only ones to stand a chance, and that’s just because they can fly. Minotaurs, dragons, and naga could take care of rock golems, but it would take an elder dragon to destroy a metal golem. Even a few rock golems could easily destroy a city. So please don’t get hung up on the small details, my lady. These things are incredibly deadly, even if they’re weaker than the metal golems.”

“Wait, are you serious? Could these things really clear a city?” I asked.

“Have you seen the state of the Equestrian military?” Jak asked. “The standard attack for their infantry is… a kick. What’s a kick gonna do to a rock golem? The pegasi could try dropping things on the golems, but they run the risk of the things they drop being thrown back. Unicorns could possibly use the environment to trap a golem, but they’re almost impossible to directly attack with magic. If any of these golems went wild, the only thing that could realistically stop it is one of the elementals, Jonathan, or one of the overpowered sisters.”

“Nice, so we created some unstoppable super soldiers!” I said. “How do you think they’ll fare against demons?”

“I’ve been told that demons are weakest to silver and iron. We’ve made several prototype demon slayers out of iron. Once we have the designs down, we’ll begin producing them in both iron and silver. The silver models can hold much more magic, so they’re considerably more powerful.”

“Would it be possible to use a steel frame with iron or silver weapons?” I asked.

“That was part of the point of making the modular golem you saw back there,” he said. “If all we’re talking about is a golem made to fight, they really don’t need anything more than a very pointy arm, like the legs of the exploration golems you probably saw on the way in. After all, killing is just as easy as stabbing something hard enough. So most of the weapons we equip the golems with will be very simple, not things that need a lot of runes. We can have steel frames with iron weapons specialised for slaying demonspawn. Then we can use full silver to make the models used to kill the stronger demons.”

“That seems like so much work, though,” Kat said. “If the golems are as strong as you say, why not just create a ton of cheap iron golems and let them do all the work?”

“Because where’s the fun in that?” I asked. “Jak’s having a blast. Who are you to stop the natural progression of weaponry? If we listened to all the naysayers, we’d still be using clubs and rocks instead of magic golems and runic artillery!”

“Speaking of which, we’ve already started prototypes of the artillery,” Jak said. “Luna used her magic to help speed that project along, borrowing knowledge from Flo, Blaze, and Char. All the artillery pieces are finished. Now we’re just experimenting with the ammunition and the propellant.”

“For accuracy, you need two things. First, some spin to the bullet. Second, a lot of speed to the bullet. You’d need runes for two vectors. One for rotation and the other for acceleration. If you can attach runes to the artillery piece to make the bullet spin and to expel it, that would solve your issue.”

“That’s the missing piece I mentioned before,” Jak said, nodding. “Levitation is the act of using enough magic to counteract what’s keeping us on the planet. I’m hoping the rune is actually something that applies force in a specific direction. If so, we can easily use it to make guns a possibility.”

“Wonderful. They uncovered one in the bunker recently, a basic rifle with a basic scope. I’m having it delivered to my house so we can use it as a model. This particular weapon has historical significance, so I’d rather it not be damaged too heavily.”

“We’ll take care of it.”

“And they uncovered another, smaller gun called a revolver. I don’t mind showing it around the ship myself, but I’m not letting anyone take it out of my sight.”

“Suspicious, but no problem. Having more actual examples to learn from will be valuable. There’s no need to destroy the existing models.”

“Fantabulous. By chance, do you think this ship could be used to remodel boats into airships?”

“Yes,” he replied with a nod. “But we’ll need to finish the cranes we’re building first and we’ll only be able to do two to four at a time, depending on their size. Speaking of which, I’d like to request two scouting airships. The bugs can harvest an astounding amount of resources once they’ve found what they’re looking for, but we have to use magic with a limited range to hunt for resources. Right now, we’re using chariots, but those are very limited.”

“I can’t promise it’ll be quick, but it will happen. I’m apparently building a town near the Everfree. Part of the package is a group of mercenaries. I’m planning on sending them with Luna to borrow some pirate ships. We can use the ones you don’t need for trading.”

“Excellent. What races are the mercenaries?”

“Dogs, unicorns, griffins, and cats.”

“Good. I’ll upgrade their equipment with runes. I dare any of them to lose to mere pirates after that! We’ve also worked out a way to add a few runes to crossbows, but it only makes the bolt fly faster. Still, that’ll be useful against pirates.”

“Bows would be more useful at sea. It’s harder to aim on a rocking boat, so something fast firing is better. But if you have time to set up a shot, then crossbows definitely do the trick. Especially if your target is just hovering in the air, gloating like a moron. I’m not sure how well the dogs would be able to use them, but the cats would probably be super deadly with crossbows. It’ll be a hundred dogs and ten cats.”

“We’re working on automatic crossbows now, which should solve most of those issues. We can do metal armor for the unicorns, but it’s hard to make armor for a griffin.”

“What about leather? That’s what Athena’s golems are made of.”

“We’re in the experimental phases of applying runes to leather,” he replied, rubbing the back of his neck. “Leather from normal food animals that you can get from the griffins can’t hold much magic. It takes leather from magical creatures like those in the Everfree to make something worth using. Unfortunately, those are a pain to come across unless you happen to know of a nearby cursed area. We can harvest some when we get to Canterlot. I never thought to make armor out of it, though…”

“When you harden leather the right way, it’s very tough. If you add on runes, I imagine it would become stronger than typical steel armor while being several times lighter and more comfortable.”

“...Interesting. That adds several more uses for leather.”

“Humans used leather for a lot of things. More than anything else, I was shocked that almost no cultures here have a history of using it. The griffins do some work with it, but not much. I guess that just means there’s yet another market I get to monopolize…”

“That evil smirk suits you well, countess,” Kat said, rubbing the top of her head against my neck. “I do so love watching you ascend the stairs of power!”

“Good, because you’re going to be seeing a lot more of it in the future. So, what else have you guys been up to on the ship?”

“Well, Jonathan’s working on perfecting his miracle fruits and vegetables. They’re designed to be everything a human needs to sustain themselves while tasting amazing. He’s also working on berries that help restore your energy very quickly. He says that when he’s done, they can be grown just about anywhere without any special attention or need for fancy fertilizers. Though without his help, it would take a while for them to grow.”

“I’m looking forward to the final results. I also hope he can help me grow some spices and coffee. There are a ton of plant materials that the ponies still don’t have access to.”

“He said the berries were made to replace coffee. They’re more effective, taste better, and are healthier, according to him.”

“I don’t care, I still want my coffee. Oh, has there been any luck with replicating the big dome shield that was over the Zone? I feel like that might be useful in Tartarus.”

“Most of the runes in that room went into converting the energy from the lava into magic, and that required a living being to act as the transfer point. If we want to convert lava into magical energy without a sacrifice, we’ll need more space for more runes, but it’s probably possible. Those runes in particular were for converting heat into magic, but it’s probably possible to convert other types of energy into magic as well.”

“Would a tree work instead of a person?”

“No, don’t be ridiculous. I already said wood doesn’t retain magic well.”

“Wood doesn’t, sure,” I said. “But what about a tree?”

“Trees are made of wood!” Jak said, almost shouting.

“Yeah, dead wood. Athena told me that magic comes from life, and that more life in an area, even if it’s just plantlife, generates more magic. So it makes sense that normal wood would hold as much magic as normal leather. But according to Luna, people can either engrave or tattoo themselves with runes to get their power. Could you do the same thing to a tree that’s still living, using the tree’s life force to maintain the magic?”

“That… is actually a good question. We have not tried. I’ll ask some of the wood runecrafters to visit the surface with some of the collection squads to test it. All of your ideas really are exciting!”

“Has Flo been helping provide schematics for technologies you want to experiment with?”

“She’s spread the knowledge on the laptop to the rest of the elementals, minus Aerie,” Jak said. “The engines on this airship are all runic, so we’re studying them as best we can without disassembling them. Once we know more, we’ll combine what we learned with engine schematics from the humans to see what we can cobble together. That’s currently the primary goal of the runic research team. Those books will be invaluable to them.”

“I’m glad,” the unnamed mare said. “It’s better that books be read than sitting pointlessly in a library. To be honest, I barely even cracked those books open before bringing them here. If I had understood the potential for runes, I would have paid considerably more attention.”

“Minotaurs have a long history of working with runes, but most of the ones we knew before I met the little lassie here were very basic. Athena has opened my eyes considerably, but there are gaps even in her knowledge. Or perhaps there are just gaps in her memory? It’s impossible to tell with her.”

“Did… did you walk her maze?” the mare whispered.

“Indeed, along with my golem. Didn’t Taya also walk it?”

“She did, with Kat’s help,” I said. “Luna did it on her own. So did Celestia. From what Athena told me, the maze changes itself based on the number of people you bring. Each extra person multiplies the number of rooms. Two is probably the sweet spot, if they go in prepared. One is good if that person is very powerful or they have something powerful like a golem. Three is suicide unless you’re all very powerful, very prepared, and very coordinated. However, the rewards you can get in Athena’s realm can make it worthwhile, but certainly not worth your life.”

“...Even a little filly made it,” the mare muttered. She followed it with a sigh.

“Taya’s no mere little girl,” Kat said. “She’s our lady’s vicious attack filly! The number of ways she can use magic to destroy things is incredibly impressive.”

“And scary,” Jak unnecessarily added.

“Yes, and it’s utterly terrifying,” Kat said, nodding. “No one girl should have all that power. The clock’s ticking, I’m just counting the hours…”

“Taya’s not gonna go trippin’ off the power,” I said, patting her arm. “And if she ever does, the plan is to kill her, start over from her last seed, and tell her I killed her as punishment for something trivial. That’ll put her in her place.”

“I thought Doppel told you that you weren’t allowed to say things like that anymore,” Kat said.

“Oh, were jokes about murdering my filly included?”

“Yep, that’s our lady for you,” Jak said. “I guess if her backup method works, killing her isn’t the worst thing that you could do, but… Should her mother really be saying things like that?”

“Probably not, if I’m being honest,” I replied with a shrug. “So let’s get back on topic.”

“No time, we’re at our destination,” Jak said, finally stepping into one of the workshops.

We all followed. There were several sets of runic armor in this room. Two sets stood out. One because it was obviously made for a biped and the other because it seemed to be made for a filly about Taya’s size. I suddenly had a pretty good guess as to what his gift was.

“Your new armor is finished, my lady,” he predictably said. You could have at least wrapped it in a canvas or something. “We’ve also finished the primary pieces of Taya’s armor.”

“The primary pieces?” I asked.

“Luna knows a lot more runes related to equine bodies than bipedal bodies, so she gave us several runic combinations with different effects. This one provides an overall increase in physical abilities and can be powered with a blood gem to increase its physical defense, her strength, and her speed.”

“Sounds nice. Nothing for her magic potential?”

“Luna told us that’s a double-edged sword we don’t want to touch. The reasons are really complex, but I can explain if you’re interested.”

“I’m not.” The tower mare whimpered just a little. We ignored it. “What does my armor do?”

“Luna only knew one runic combination for bipeds,” Jak said. “It’s called the Revenant Armor. At the start, it acts as normal armor. But the more blood you shed while wearing it, the stronger it becomes. That includes physical defense, your strength, your speed, your stamina, and eventually it’ll begin changing shape to suit you better.”

“All of that sounds pretty eerie,” I said. “Do I have to actually kill people while wearing it, or will making people bleed do it?”

“Luna specifically said it reacts to blood, not to death. She was quite particular about it, in fact. She also offered to be the first one to bleed for you to increase your strength.”

“Too bad,” Kat said. “That will be my responsibility!”

“We don’t have anyone who can heal in here, so it’ll have to wait. Now, help me get it on.”

“B-but my lady, there are others here,” Kat whispered, staring at Jak.

“By which I very obviously meant help me put the armor on. Get your mind out of the gutter, you whore.”

“Oh. W-well… There are still others present! My lady, you shouldn’t just let others see you naked…”

“Half the people in this room are naked, Kat. She doesn’t care and Jak just sees me as a lassie, so get over yourself.” With that, I pushed her away and started trying to pull my dress off. Kat groaned before doing it for me. With that thing out of the way, I kicked off my shoes and approached the suit of armor. It was a surprisingly shiny set of black fluted armor. The runes were painted with red magical ink. “What’s this armor made out of? Its radiance is unreal.”

“Titanium. So is Taya’s. The amount of magic it can store is incredible.”

“Wow. I guess you can’t go wrong with that. Wait, before I try putting this on, has it been adjusted for my new measurements?”

“Yes. We borrowed Luna for some magic molding. Some of the runes had to be redone, but it didn’t take long. If you’d like, she can mold it to be a tighter fit to show off more of your curves.”

“That sounds like a bad idea for practical purposes, so no.” Kat began helping me put everything. Given that it was made of titanium, it was unbelievably light. “This is amazing. But… why isn’t there a helmet?”

“It goes against the purposes of the Revenant runes. According to Luna, the runes can only be applied to a set of armor that’s under a certain set weight. It’s supposed to be used for berserker tactics, where the warrior rushes in and uses speed and strength to wear enemies down. Heavy armor would slow the warrior down and impede his movements. Since the main bipeds she worked with were cats, that fit their fighting style perfectly.”

“It certainly does,” Kat said with a nod. “My lady, a similar set of armor would make me more proficient in battle.”

“If you think Jak’s going to outfit a bunch of no-name mercenaries before the people I personally picked, you’re out of your mind,” I said. “Jak, hook everyone up with the best stuff we can get them.”

“The new armor for all your pony guards is in the final stages. We’ve also prepared some pieces for the naga and Spike. We had no idea Kat would be interested in armor, but we’ll set aside another batch of titanium for her.”

“Please make mine as sexy as possible,” Kat said. “I’d like to be able to catch my lady’s eye even on the battlefield.”

“That would be my pleasure,” the (apparently lecherous) old man replied.

“Is the battlefield really the best place to catch someone’s eye? What if I get distracted and killed because of it?”

“Then I will finally be able to brag about my killer body,” Kat dreamily replied.

“Well, everyone’s gotta have a goal, I guess,” Jak said. “I’ll happily respect it.”

“S-so… What’s that ink made from?” the mare quietly asked.

“Crushed blood gems, virgin blood, ink, and a dash of chili powder for coloring and to help spice it up a little.”

Kat leaned in and licked one of the runes on my armor. “Oh wow, you’re right. It’s faint, though. The blood mostly overpowers it, but I definitely catch hints of the ink. I felt the crushed gems, but couldn’t taste them.”

“Kat, you can’t just go around licking people in public,” I said. “So, do I look like a hero yet?”

“Now you look like a fairy sword princess,” Kat said. I decided to see how flexible my tail was by attempting to choke Kat with it. The noises she was barely able to make told me it was definitely pretty flexible.

“So, do I look like a hero yet?” I asked, looking at the other two with a smile.

“Yes, my lady!” the mare immediately replied.

“With Kat in your grip like that, I’d say you seem a little more like a villain,” Jak said. “It looks like she’s starting to enjoy it, but that really doesn’t make you look any better…”

That told me all I needed to know, so I released my naughty catgirl and walked over to the long mirror set up in one of the corners. The bright black armor with the blood red runes all over it just didn’t seem to suit me for some reason. “Can we darken the metal?”

“Absolutely not,” Jak said. “I was okay with it when you were just a mercenary queen, but now you’re going to be a general. You have to stand out to inspire the troops.”

“I don’t want to be blinded by my own armor. But whatever. Once I shed enough blood, maybe it’ll change to something unassuming. I should start wearing this around instead of a dress.”

“We could probably make you a really pretty combat dress,” Jak said. “It wouldn’t be ready in time for the pageant, but it would be finished before the Gala.”

“What are you talking about? Celestia can’t force me to go to the Gala anymore. And more to the point, the very idea of a combat dress is completely contradictory. I forbid you from making one and I especially forbid you from bringing it up around others. That goes for you too, Kat.”

“I don’t see what the big deal is, but okay,” Jak said with a shrug. Kat looked extremely disappointed, but part of that might have just come from getting choked.

“When can you have Taya’s armor delivered? The sooner she gets used to wearing it, the better. I don’t plan on having her participate in any more fights, but it’s still better that she knows how to deal with armor just in case.”

“I can have it packed up and sent to the teleport circle so you can take it with you when you leave, if you’d like,” Jak said.

“I would. Do you happen to know if a runic horn would be possible?”

Jak looked over at the dehorned mare, whose eyes were now wide. “Unfortunately, I don’t think so,” he said, turning his head back to me. “If it did work, it would probably have to be charged with blood gems and it would likely only have a limited number of possible spells. Zecora might know some spooky voodoo that could help.”

“Do you know what she did with all the alicorn we looted from the unicorns guarding the bunker?”

“Zecora had a workroom built at the bunker. They’re likely stored within it.”

“Cool. Those unicorns weren’t very good at magic, but I guess a weak horn is better than none. Is that fine with you?”

“Yes!” the mare yelled. “I… I thought I would… have to get one myself.”

“I doubt Zecora will care if we take one. We’ll stop by her workroom on the way back. You can get Twilight to attach it later. Now, what else do you have to show me?”

The next few things on the tour were magic artillery pieces. None of them were very large, but I wasn’t expecting the prototypes to take up too many resources. The fact that the artillery was easily transportable and had a wide aiming range was more important than being able to shoot very far, at least at the moment. I did eventually want a gun large enough that it would take a train to move it, but that was a project for the future. There was no ammo for the artillery, nor was there a system to make the cannons actually fire, so looking them over didn’t take very long.

After that, Jak took us to view some of the other siege weapons that had been found on the ship. Most were similar in nature to a ballista or catapult, with a few variations here and there. To be honest, there aren’t that many different ways to make siege engines without using magic or technology.

That said, these ballistae and catapults had been upgraded with various runes. From what Jak told us, a single shot from one of the ballistae could punch a hole through a castle wall. Clearly, choosing to attack the ship head on before it could get above us had been the right call. If our shields had been hit by the siege weapons on the ship, we would have either been wiped out or forced to retreat.

The last thing Jak showed us in the metalworking area was where they built the crossbows. They already had a prototype of a repeating crossbow, but it was so bulky that it had to be mounted for anyone other than a minotaur to fire it. And instead of having a trigger, it used a crank. Twisting the crank to a certain degree would pull the string back, which released the mechanism holding the top bolt of the magazine in place. Twisting the crank further pushed the bolt out and then locked it into place. Continuing to twist would release the locks on the bolt and the string, propelling the round forward. At that point, the crank would be back in the beginning position and could be spun to fire once more. It was exactly the kind of thing that I wanted to mount onto a flying chariot.

Other than the really cool repeating crossbow, they also had several runic crossbows of various sizes. All the pony researchers had the common goal of making a crossbow model that even ponies could use, so several of the pieces we saw were fairly outlandish. I also think that ponies need more and better weapons, but I’m not really sure something that takes two hands to wield is the best choice.

One of the crossbows was a special order from Kat, so we took it with us on the way out. The runic bolts would have to be delivered later, since they ended up being very heavy. Her melee weapons had already been finished and delivered, so we didn’t need to worry about them.

After we finished on deck three, Jak took us up to the second deck to show off the stone golems. They could be made much more quickly and cheaply than metal golems, yet they were still strong enough to take out a city. Truly, it was impressive.

The prototype rock golems were made of rough stone and definitely weren’t pretty, but I could tell by looking at them that a punch from their arms would be lethal. The newer golems were polished to the point of being shiny and the runes were drawn on with much more precision. They were also made of different types of stone.

Three golems in particular stood out. One was made of mostly clear crystal. I could see swirls of magic inside of it. They were centered around the runes covering the outside, but the magical current obviously went through the entire golem. The next was made of a green stone called aventurine. Normally, that kind of rock is very rough. But when sanded down, it becomes so smooth that it can be hard to hold. This particular golem had been polished so well that the green was nearly a black. The last golem was made of obsidian and had blood rubies lodged where a human’s eyes should be. Apparently those gems allowed it to imbue heat into its strikes.

Since there were already a few dozen stone golems just waiting in the storehouse, I had him send those three up to the deck so I could take them with us when we left. An unstoppable super soldier that only obeys me sounds like a good bodyguard to keep around. It wouldn’t quite be a replacement for Kat, but with luck, I could use the golems to guard me instead every now and then.

Also, they looked badass. Having one of those walking with me around Canterlot would start the right kinds of rumors and keep ruffians away at the same time.

A lot of other things were being built with stone, but most of the stonecrafter rune workers were trying to put runes to use in making better buildings with more features. The only thing of interest at the moment was a runic air conditioner, but I didn’t care enough to walk all the way to see it.

Instead, he took us to the first deck, where all the wooden things were being made. A lot was going on there as well, but the only thing he wanted to show us was the runic instruments. Apparently they had been experimenting with the magic horn I got at the same time I picked up Athena’s book and used some of the runes on other instruments to create a variety of effects. When played, the music could calm someone, rile them up, confuse them, or put them to sleep. Unfortunately, the effect also worked on the person playing the instrument, so it still needed to be tweaked. But once it’s perfected, bards will finally have their place in Equestria.

By the time we finished looking over the instruments, it was almost time for the ship to start moving again. I definitely didn’t want to get stranded on board, so I called it quits on the tour and we headed back up top. Jak left us at the elevator and went back down while we walked to the teleporter.

Waiting for us there were three golems and a box of armor. Once everyone and everything was in the teleport circle, Silence used magic to take us back to the fortress at the top of the bunker. The two guards were still standing there and seemed somewhat surprised to see the large golems with us.

“Are these more prototypes?” one of them asked.

“No, these are going to be my new guards,” I said. “No one is going to be stabbing me in the back with a horn while they’re around.”

“...Please don’t bring that up around Luna,” the other guard said, rubbing the back of his neck. “From the stories I heard from the ones on duty, she was angry enough after it happened that she’s probably still looking for ways to get back at us for letting Blueblood through…”

“Didn’t Blueblood poison the party first?” the ex-unicorn mare asked. “I heard that he used a plant from the Everfree to confuse everyone that ate the food. Weren’t the guards eating, too?”

“It truly takes a vile mind to poison innocent partygoers,” I idly said, looking off into the distance. “Especially at a party as famous as Celestia’s Gala. I’m sure both princesses were furious. I spent most of the month afterwards bedridden, so I didn’t get to see either that often right afterwards. Although I did have two different princesses staying in my house at the time, so there’s that. One married and the other wasn’t interested in me, though, so having them around was more draining than anything.”

“I don’t think you’re meant to talk about royalty that way…” one of the guards muttered.

“Who died and made Cadance a princess, anyway? I certainly didn’t vote for her. Anyway, I’d like to visit one of the workshops in the fort. Kat, Silence, do you know where Zecora’s shop is?”

“Most of my time in the Zone is spent underground,” Kat said. “Same for Silence. We don’t really walk around the fort.”

“I see. Would one of you guards be able to guide us around?”

“We only really know the surface level and a few of the common areas inside, but I can take you to one of the water elementals inside,” half the guards said. “With the ship leaving, our shift is basically over anyway.”

“I don’t plan to stay long, I just want to pick something up and leave. If Silence heads home first, could you teleport me back once I’m done?”

“Of course, my lady,” the guard replied with a bow.

“Thank you. Silence, take the golems and the box back to the house. The box should go to my room. For now, have the crystal golem sent to my room, the aventurine golem sent to guard the main entrance, and the obsidian golem patrol the yard.” He bowed and led the golems off, floating the box of armor behind him. “So, where to?”

“You’re right where you need to be,” the guard said. He took a few steps closer, so he was also on the teleport pad. This his horn lit up and we appeared in a roped off corner of a large common area. A few off-duty guards looked up when we arrived and their eyes widened. Whispers spread across the room as our guide led the way further in. Acknowledging the peasants was beneath me, of course, so I dutifully ignored them.

Our guide didn’t have to take us far. The water elemental in question was in an office attached to the common area. She turned pink and bowed when she saw me. “Welcome to the fort, my lady,” Waterfall said.

“There’s no real need to pay obeisance to me, you know,” I said. “It’s nice to see you again. How are things going here?”

She stood back up to show off her smile. “Our progress in studying the objects Jonathan provides us is going well. Our progress in dealing with the lingering spirits on the surface is mostly finished. The progress below, in the bunker proper, has been slow. Unfortunately, there’s nothing any of us can really do to help Zecora…”

“I wonder if she’s considered taking on an apprentice. I’ll ask her next time I see her. Speaking of Zecora, I need to pick something up from her workshop, but I don’t know the way. Can you point us in the right direction?”

“I’d be happy to guide you myself,” she replied. “It’s not a very long walk. This fortress is far too large for all the researchers and soldiers we have on site, so everything is pretty close together despite the place being so huge.”

“Then lead the way, if you’d be so kind.”

“Follow me, my lady.” With that, Waterfall led the way out. We went from the common room to a long hallway that led so far into the distance that the curve of the fortress blocked our vision. “Princess Gilda would probably appreciate it if you visited, too. Her lab is on the way.”

“She has a lab here?” I asked.

“Apparently she wanted to spend her time before the pageant learning more about nanomachines, so she asked if she could set up a lab to study us and Jonathan. None of us saw any harm in it, so we allowed it.”

“We can stop by to say hi on the way out, I guess. I figured she would be spending more time trying to get her university together, but whatever.”

“The upside of being royalty is that she can easily get all the support she might need, even without proper preparations,” Kat said.

“That’s not necessarily true for the youngest princess of the warlike race when she wants to build an institute of learning. From my understanding, Gilda’s influence is relatively weak due to her status as an eccentric who actually likes learning. Without proper planning, getting a university running might be difficult, time consuming, and might even require hiring teachers from outside. That would be the worst case scenario.”

“What’s wrong with that?” the mare from the tower asked. “We’ve had a few griffins working in the tower before and none had problems learning from us.”

“The griffins that come to Equestria are usually very different from the griffins who don’t,” I said. “I can only imagine griffins reacting poorly to a university being funded by royalty having a staff made up solely of ponies. Their pride would take a huge hit and they’d have issues recruiting students. It’s not a problem to have some teachers of other races, but if most of them are, that wouldn’t be viable.”

“Our lady is right,” Kat said. “They wouldn’t take kindly to learning from ponies in their own country. But surely griffin teachers would flock to a university with royal backing!”

“Maybe. But that’s leaving up to chance what could instead be taken care of by preparation. I guess her university isn’t really my concern, though. I’m sure she’ll manage. If not, she can ask for my help.”

“Do you think water elementals could be teachers?” Waterfall asked.

“I was hoping that was the kind of role the water elementals would take after everything is said and done,” I replied. “I heard Flo spread the knowledge from the laptop around. That means all of you know basically everything humanity knew. I feel like using that knowledge to teach and guide the mortal races is pretty close to what you were originally designed to do. The main difference is that now you won’t be acting as gods.”

“I… I also think that might be a good role for us,” Waterfall said. “It would not do for us to recreate all of this technology ourselves. The mortal races must be allowed to live their own lives, building what they wish where they wish it. Our role should no longer be ruling but guiding. I heard you were founding a university of your own, my lady. Would you allow a water elemental to teach there?”

“Yes. I’m also founding a town around the university. Having a few water elementals there would be a good thing, I think. It’s going to be a town with a lot of different races, so you guys could help keep the peace.”

“I’ll bring it up with my sisters, then,” Waterfall said with a nod. “As much as I’d love to volunteer, it’s better to discuss these things first… Okay, we’ve decided. Naiad and I will help your town.”

That was fast. I guess it makes sense, given that they’re all connected now. “Wonderful. I’m not sure exactly when construction will begin, but Flo will keep you informed.”

“Good timing,” Waterfall said, slowing to a stop. “This is Zecora’s workshop.” She pushed the door open and slid back.

“Kat, you first,” I said. Just in case there’s a trap. Kat thought nothing of my innocuous command and went inside. Nothing happened to her, so the mare and I followed.

As expected, most of Zecora’s workshop was taken up by alchemical equipment. The rest was taken up by alchemical reagents. They were all very organized, so finding the horns we were looking for was easy. Soon enough, the mare was looking over ten different horns, trying to decide which to pick.

“So… where exactly did these come from?” she asked as she fitted one of the horns to the nub on her forehead. “You mentioned the assault on the bunker, but…”

“The sapient nanomachines that lived here protected this place from all manner of interference. One of the things it could do was claim the bodies of those that attacked, destroying their minds in the process. So it gathered together a bunch of ponies that attacked and then began breeding them. Since food was never an issue and they couldn’t die of old age due to the nanites, the population rapidly grew. Then we swept through and killed most of them over the course of two days. Since useful reagents like alicorn and dragon bones are hard to come by, we made sure to loot what we could from the bodies.”

“...I see. I’d like this one.” She picked the one with the same color as the rest of her stub. It could be reattached without being too noticeable.

“Then let’s put the others back and leave before more people try to talk to me,” I said. Kat was already cleaning up our very small mess, so I probably didn’t need to give the order. Moments later, we were back out in the hall. Kat had the mare’s new horn in a pocket.

“So, our next stop is the princess’s workshop?” Waterfall asked as she started sliding back the way we came.

“Yes,” I said. I didn’t really want to deal with Princess Gilda at the moment, but she might be a little peeved if she found out I stopped by and didn’t say anything.

“Well, here we are,” Waterfall replied, sliding to a stop in front of the door right next to Zecora’s room. Her knock on the door sounded strangely solid for someone who appeared to be made out of water. Instead of waiting for a reply, she opened the door just a crack and slid her upper body through. A moment later, she slipped back out. “You may enter.” She opened the door the rest of the way and waved me through.

The others stayed out in the hall for some reason. That was fine by me, because I really didn’t want to stay long. When I walked in, I saw several griffins poking through produce, gems, and potted plants. The princess was among them, but she noticed me enter and walked over immediately. “Welcome, Nav. Would you like a quick tour?”

Not really, but… “If you wouldn’t mind. I thought it would be a good idea to learn more about what’s actually going on here. To be honest, I thought you might be using this place to try to reverse engineer some of the artifacts.”

“When you first began teaching me human knowledge from your laptop, you told me something that didn’t honestly click until I began seeing the first few artifacts that were pulled out. We don’t even have the tools needed to make the tools needed to repair the technology the humans had. We’re so many technological generations behind that as far as we’re concerned, those devices might as well be magical artifacts. The only things I even recognized were those you showed me pictures of, or things that weren’t technological in nature. We’re going to have to start from scratch and work our way forwards. The shortcut your knowledge grants us will be enough. But that does not mean the Zone has nothing of value for us. Rare are the crops that grow in the cold north. With the farming methods you’ve provided, we did increase our yields, but having crops that were built from the ground up to be resistant to cold will change everything for us… and for our northerly neighbors in the Crystal Empire.”

“And Jonathan just gave that to you?” I asked. “I assumed he was hoarding most of his haul for humanity.”

“I used logic against him,” Gilda proudly replied, holding a claw to her chest. “Since all of the living races are technically human creations, that means the humans wouldn’t want us to die off, and in fact would prefer it if we prosper so we can more easily defeat Discord. To that end, I posited, it would be better to give us at least the means with which to prosper. All I asked for were seeds, not for him to come and build us an entire nation-sustaining farm. After a few seconds of thinking, he muttered something about coming to a consensus, and then spat out a pack of seeds infused with nanites. Apparently the first batch will grow instantly, but after that, we’ll have to grow them ourselves. This over here is the final product.”

She led me to a small row of potted plants. “Are those brussel sprouts?” I asked.

“Oh, you know them?” she asked, seeming fairly shocked. “So these were a human crop?”

“Yeah. You know, I thought ponies had brussel sprouts? Maybe not… Well, whatever. I’m sure Jonathan’s done all kinds of modifications to these, anyway. It looks like you also have onions in the list of samples. Are you growing those, too?”

“Oh ho, so Jonathan truly must have modified them,” Gilda said. “Behold!” She reached out to one of the plants and ripped it out of the pot, roots and all. That’s when I saw that onions were dangling at the ends of said roots.

“Isn’t that neat?” I said, reaching over to grab one. They were some fairly hefty red onions. “I know ponies have these, or at least they have golden onions. But I’ve never seen them grow on the end of brussel sprouts. Jonathan’s going to be very useful, I see.” I let the onion drop back down and Gilda shoved the whole thing back in the pot.

“This will help lower food costs,” Gilda said. “And when those are lowered, griffins will be able to spend more money on other things… like technology!”

“That’s correct,” I said. “But that means you need to make them want to buy technology. When I was in Gryphus the last time, all the shopkeepers and business owners I ran into had nothing but nice things to say about you, because of how much tech you’ve brought to them. That right there is your ticket. If you can market your products to the shop owners and sell things to them, they’ll do the job of convincing all the commoners for you.”

“That was… more or less my plan,” she said. “I was hoping that giving things to the shop owners would help, but…”

“Just giving things away isn’t enough. You need to market your product, not just sell it. But that’s something we can talk about later. I’d like to know the story behind those gems they’re playing with. I can understand needing crops, but why do you need those?”

“There’s an overabundance of magic in Equestria that leads to a variety of interesting effects,” Gilda said. “One of those effects is that many of the gems they find are already naturally cut, at least to an acceptable degree. However, most of the gems we find in our nation are uncut and rough. We knew beautiful gems were possible, but we assumed that without magic, they were unattainable. But the gems that Jonathan provided us with were cut from rough gems! It’s astounding! If a technique like this can travel to Gryphus, the mounds and mounds of useless rocks we have can be turned into gold!”

“Oh, gem cutting,” I said with a nod. “Humans had to use tools to dig their gems out of the ground. Then they had to cut them by hand to make them beautiful. Yeah, that’ll definitely make bank.”

“...So you know of gem cutting, too,” Gilda slowly said. “I truly wish I had brought a list of questions when I visited all those years ago. There are a number of things I’m sure a human could definitely help fix in our kingdom, but without knowledge of what to even ask, it’s hard to make much progress…”

“Now that I’m finally beginning to feel the sparks of ambition for the first time in a long time, I’m very grateful that you didn’t,” I said. “Because now I can implement all of those awesome human ideas in the private market, take control of the economy of the entire world, and rule from the shadows like the introvert I am.”

“Well, as long as you promise to give the griffins favorable deals, I’m okay with that. Oh, Jonathan gave us an explanation of the gem cutting and showed us all how it’s done, but he didn’t use any tools and his explanation was a little… wanting. Can I ask you to provide more instructions later?”

“Yes, I can do that.” Or my Flo brand printer can, at least. “Hey, if you’re still looking for other types of crops you could plant, have you considered mushrooms?”

“Mushrooms are not an option,” she immediately replied. “Griffins can’t stand them. The texture is just… ugh!”

“Is it griffins who can’t stand them or just you?”

“Almost all griffins,” one of the other researchers replied. “It’s not something most other races know, but eating mushrooms with a beak just feels…” Several of the researchers shivered a little.

“That’s just how it is,” Gilda said with a shrug. “Some weirdos are fine with them, but we don’t talk about those people.” One of the researchers standing near the corner sighed and hung his head. The others glared at him.

“Well, it is how it is or whatever,” I said. “You know, all of those rude whispers about you would disappear if any of your people saw you like this. You even risked your life to help us take this place. You need to make sure people find out about this when you go home, understand? No more hiding in your workshop.”

“Says the human who’s talking about ruling from the shadows. Besides, you needn’t worry. My brother has already published that I helped sponsor and lead the team that finally unraveled the mysteries of the dangerous Zone of Alienation. The leading part is mostly there as propaganda, of course, but it would be impossible to tell everyone that griffin royalty was following the orders of an Equestrian noble…”

“Understandable. So, what’s he doing to make sure everyone understands what a big deal conquering the Zone is? Most people have never even heard of it, to my understanding.”

“It’s apparently different in our country,” Gilda said. “That’s how I was able to find information, as well as a guide. That said, most griffins only ever heard of it through rumors and stories and no one knew anything concrete. But the fact that one of their princesses was able to finally bring truth to those rumors and stories is fairly important, especially since it involved so much fighting. I highly doubt I’ll be known as a princess of battle, but my days of being the forgotten royal are over.”

“Good. And…” I leaned in closer, so hopefully only she would hear. “...Don’t forget how scared you were when we got here. Remember that feeling and stay humble.”

“I am absolutely in no hurry to repeat this experience, I assure you,” she said, looking away with a blush. “And p-please… don’t get so close…”

“‘Kay.” I pulled back. “So, do you have any other fun projects while you’re here?”

“I’ve been helping coordinate research results between the races gathered here,” Gilda said. “The water elementals have been doing most of the work, but again, as royalty…”

“You had to be involved in some kind of leadership, right,” I said. “So far, I’ve seen ponies, griffins, and changelings. Is there anyone else represented here?”

“There’s a contingent of minotaurs on the way,” Gilda said. “Princess Celestia has asked that I advertise our ongoing efforts at the pageant to see if any other races are interested in sending support. But to be honest, I feel like the things we’ve discovered should be kept… if not secret, then secure. I was hesitant to even allow the changelings access. They did nothing to help us pacify the place! Why should they get any benefits?”

“Violence and strife will strike this world wherever there is want and greed,” I said. “And keeping something from your neighbor instead of sharing is one of the best ways of invoking greed. If we don’t share this knowledge, we risk causing conflict, which gives power to a certain evil demon I’m trying to banish. To that end, spreading certain technologies is good because it improves everyone’s life, reduces everyone’s feelings of envy, and makes the world a better place. Besides, saying we should keep the secrets of the Zone from the changelings because they did nothing to earn it is the same as saying we should keep this technology from the rest of the griffins because they didn’t earn it. You and your five guards were the only griffins who were here, after all.”

“Hm. I suppose. Anyway, part of coordinating things is getting to look at all the artifacts that are uncovered. I’d love a chance to look over a batch of goods with you! Having live human commentary would be invaluable for studying everything!”

“You’re right,” I said. “Luna took me to one of the warehouses earlier today and I helped give the guards there a few reams of notes about items of interest. I definitely don’t know everything, but two people who do know everything live in my head. Whenever I have a full free day, I plan to spend it here, possibly even delving into the bunker itself.”

“Tch, lucky Luna,” Gilda muttered.

“That’s probably the first time anyone’s ever called her lucky. Anyway, I don’t mean to take up too much of your time.”

“I certainly don’t mind giving it, but at this point, we both have important business to be doing. So I’ll see you tonight, Nav.”

“Apparently there’s going to be some kind of celebration, so look forward to it,” I said. “Celestia’s making me a countess for my deeds and Doppel wants to do something for it.”

“Well, congratulations. I guess this will be the second night of celebrations in a row. Do keep one thing in mind as you leave, though… Don’t think you own Celestia just because she has an elemental in her. If you aren’t careful, she’ll slip a leash right back around that neck of yours. This countess business is likely part of it.”

“A lot of people want to slide a leash around my neck. I only intend to wag my tail for the right offer. But I’ll definitely keep it in mind. See you, Princess.” And with that, I finally went back to the hall. Kat was just waiting to latch herself to me, of course. The stupid horn in her pocket jammed itself in my side, which hurt a lot more than it should have. “Kat, can you be less… you?”

“I… have no experience with such matters, my lady,” Kat said. “I’m afraid I’ve only ever been… um, me.” I sure do wish I had someone normal to tell you to compare yourself to, but… “M-my lady, what’s with that pitying look…?”

“I’m sorry, Kat. I guess you never really stood a chance, huh?” She blinked a few times, probably feeling confused and insulted. “Alas. Waterfall, would you kindly lead the way back to the surface?”

“Are you sure you don’t want to see anything else?” she asked.

“If I had time to do all the things I wanted to do, yes.” Actually, that’s a lie. I’d spend it all sleeping, playing games, and letting Doppel do things to me. “I do plan on coming back here later to look around more, though. I never really expected the fort around the bunker to turn into a research center. Now I’m glad we didn’t just torch it along with everything else.”

With that, the blob of water started leading the way. “It would be impossible without the support of Celestia and those valuable teleportation rings,” Waterfall said. “All of the progress you see here is thanks to you, my lady. We pay no obeisance to your rank, only to you and your accomplishments.”

“Really? I kinda thought Luna was the main character of the bunker assault.” Or maybe Aqua, since I was merely her flesh puppet. “Didn’t she take care of most of the problems for us?”

“Luna’s not capable of being the main character,” Kat said. “She’s way too messed up in the head. She follows you around like a lost puppy, my lady. Without you, there would be no controlling her.”

Without me and my human pheromones, she might not have lost her mind as hard. Although given what I know about her history… “That might be true. In that case, that means my accomplishment is basically nothing more than being a scout for good talent.” Though again, scouting Luna was Aqua’s accomplishment…

“You seem to disregard your own leadership, for some reason,” Waterfall said. “Whose choices led us all safely through the Zone? As I recall, those choices were yours.”

“They were,” Kat said, patting my arm.

“Sure I guess.” For some reason, that made all three of the girls giggle at me. The pony guard still tagging along was smart enough to know his place.

“The fort has definitely been lively,” Waterfall said when they were done mocking me. “Celestia has sent a few public officials here to give them more of a perspective on what an accomplishment conquering the Zone was. Their reactions are always worth having to deal with their initial arrogance.”

“Yeah, a lot of ponies are just like that,” I said. “I won’t say you get used to it because it’s always annoying when some four-legged herbivore midget horse thinks he’s better than a human, but it does get easier to deal with in time. Especially when you have several achievements proving your own superiority.”

“Ponies are… arrogant?” the guard asked.

“Yes, absolutely,” Kat replied. “Celestia’s policies were purposefully designed to make ponies look down on other races. As far as most of the nobles in Canterlot are concerned, I’m barely above the intelligence level of a house cat.”

“I don’t get called a monkey anymore, but that’s probably only because my body has been altered,” I said. “Back before I got turned into a noble, I had to deal with all kinds of nonsense from ponies who didn’t think they had time for a human. Equestria’s great if you’re a pony, but there’s a reason there aren’t many other races who live here.”

“...That makes me feel a little better, at least,” the hornless mare said. “I’m glad the ponies at the tower weren’t the only arrogant fools who dared to pretend they stood above you.”

“I’m sure not,” I said. “If you tower goons were the only assholes I had to deal with in Equestria, my life would have been so much smoother.”

“Why… why didn’t you just move?” the guard asked.

“I’m not sure if you heard about Luna’s life-ruining confession where she admitted to doing a bunch of horrible things to me. But the reason I didn’t just move is because Luna was doing a bunch of horrible things to me. Oh, and so was Celestia, for that matter. I mean, they forcefully turned me into a knight specifically so I wouldn’t be able to run.”

“...Oh.”

“Yeah. Although both sisters have changed dramatically since I met them. I’m not particularly threatened by either anymore.”

“Well, are you threatened by anything?” the mare from the tower asked.

“Yes. In terms of things that are actually alive and capable of interacting with the world, the three I’m most worried about are Pyrite, Tintaglia, and Arachne. I basically have a nonaggression pact with two of them, but they’re very tenuous. And Tintaglia’s completely insane, so anything goes with her.”

“I don’t even know who any of those are,” the guard said.

“And I hope you never do. There are things normal ponies have no business knowing. If everyone knew what kinds of threats lurked in the dark places of the world, they’d be a lot more focused on building up defenses… Not that it would do them any good.”

“I think the ponies could probably survive against the normal spiders, unless Arachne herself came out to play,” Kat said. “If she decided to come north, it would pretty much be game over.”

“No, the normal spiders would devastate the ponies,” Waterfall said. “Arachne wouldn’t even be needed. The pony morale would shatter after the first few towns were devoured. Most of them are cowards and even most of the ones that can fight would be incapable of doing so against the spiders. My sisters shared some of the memories of your journey. During the fight on the deck of your ship, the only useful ponies were the unicorns.”

“That’s basically how all the wars go,” the hornless mare said. “Or at least, that’s how the history books in the tower record things.”

“Yep, that’s right,” I said. “A thousand years ago, Celestia neutered the military because most of them sided with Nightmare Moon’s coup attempt. Because of that, she’s had to fight most of the major battles either herself or using the unicorns of the tower. In fact, the move that won the war against Nightmare Moon was the unicorns from the tower summoning a comet from space to destroy Luna’s capital city, along with most of her army. And then when Luna attempted to return the favor, the tower unicorns captured the comet from the sky, mined it out, and then hung a big rock in the sky above their tower as a trophy.”

“Should you really just be spilling state secrets like that?” the mare asked.

“No, it’s cool. Celestia’s working on uncensoring history, so all of this will probably come out eventually anyway. I’m going to love it when she finally tells everyone she has no idea how the sun moves.”

“Wait, WHAT?!” the guard shouted, stopping in his tracks.

“Yeah man, it’s wild! Imagine my surprise when one of the first things I learned after I got here is that there’s a tiny horse pretending to be a sun goddess. I nearly lost my shit, especially after I found out her name was actually Celestia. And then there was another one who pretended to move the moon named… Luna! Isn’t that hilarious? They had nearly three quarters of the planet tricked into thinking they could move a literal fucking star just because they knew a little about equinoxes, eclipses, and astronomy! Of course, then I realized how dangerous it was that I knew the truth and it stopped being funny.”

“They… they tricked us?” the guard whispered.

“It hurts, doesn’t it?” the mare asked. “I looked just like you when I learned the truth.”

“Oh, the tower knows?” I asked.

“Indeed, though it’s something only the Seven had knowledge of. They call learning that fact an initiation rite, for it is one of the first truths of the world you learn as a leader of the tower, and it is possibly the most painful. Princess Celestia has spent at least three thousand years building up an unimaginable lie. And yet, not even we at the tower know how the stars and planets truly do move, so we could never disprove her claims…”

“It’s a force the humans called gravity,” I replied. “Waterfall, would you like to explain?”

“I’d be delighted!” And so she began an elementary lesson on the invisible forces that make the world work. The guard was stuck in his own world, probably still trying to get over the fact that the mare he dedicated his life to serving was ruling over him under false pretenses. Kat was paying attention, but spending her time braiding my hair. The tower mare was listening, obviously enraptured with the idea of solving more of life’s mysteries.

Myself, I was wondering if I should just leave the pony guide and find someone else to take me home. I decided that if he didn’t have his shit together by the time Waterfall’s explanation was over, I’d poke him a few times. If he didn’t respond, we’d just keep going without him.

When Waterfall finished, the stallion was muttering something under his breath and staring into space. “Is… he gonna be okay?” Kat asked, gently prodding him.

“If it comes to it, Waterfall can fix him,” I said. I walked over and snapped a few times right in front of his eyes, making him flinch and finally come to. “Hey, are you done freaking out yet? If you need more time, I can find another guide.”

“Huh? I’m… I’m fine. What were you guys saying just now? Something about Princess Gravity?”

“...Princess Gravity?” Kat asked.

“Of course, the princess.” The dude looked completely and totally sincere.

Uh oh. “Can you give me a short description of Princess Gravity?” I asked.

“Huh? My lady, you see her so often, though! She’s a beautiful white alicorn with a cutie mark of the sun. She’s the mare who makes the world go ‘round!” His smile cracked for a moment, but not very long. “You were just talking about her!”

“Holy shit, I did break him! Do you know the name Celestia?”

“I’ve never heard it in my life, my lady. What do you mean, broke me?”

“Waterfall, you’re up,” I said. “Remove his memory of the last five minutes.”

“Normally I would protest such a command, but to fix that which is broken…” She started sliding forward.

The guard’s eyes went wide and he tried running, but I snatched his tail before he could get anywhere. “Princess Gravity, save me! Please!” That was all the time the poor fool had time to say before Waterfall performed a little snip-snip. Moments later, he was back on his feet. He took a quick look around before blushing slightly. “W-why are you all looking at me?”

“Can you give me a quick list of the members of Equestrian royalty as of five years ago?” I asked.

“Huh? I mean, yes, of course. Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Princess Cadance, Prince Blueblood, Prince Shining Armor, and… I don’t think Princess Skyla was born yet. Although I’m also not sure how long it’s been since Prince Shining Armor married. Time sure does fly, huh?”

“It sure does,” I said. “Let’s get moving again.” And just like that, we left his horrific mental trauma in the dust. Still, though… “This might be a bigger problem than I thought. Is everyone gonna react like that when they find out?”

“That depends on how the topic is approached, likely,” Waterfall said. “If it’s flippantly thrown into a conversation like it’s some kind of comedy routine, it might be slightly more traumatizing.”

“Most of those who are capable of being leaders of the tower have minds strong enough to handle such information, so I can safely say nothing of the sort has ever happened to any of us.”

“I’ll have to talk it over with Celestia. We might need to rethink how we release the information.”

“Ponies really are weak,” Kat whispered disdainfully. I’m pretty sure I was the only one who heard it. To be honest, I couldn’t disagree.

When we got back to the common area, I was momentarily alarmed by the pall of darkness clouding one of the corners of the room. Then I saw that it was caused by Luna. She had a very large section mostly to herself with a huge no-pony’s-land all around her. At the moment, she was eating with Zecora. Unfortunately, her eyes locked on mine as soon as I saw her. That meant I couldn’t leave without at least saying hi. I really didn’t want to have to deal with her again so soon, but I guess that’s life for you.

“I think I can borrow my vassal’s power to get home, after all,” I said. “I’ll ask Luna to ferry us back. You can join your friends and relax.”

“Are you sure, my lady?” the guard asked. “I certainly don’t mind.”

“Luna would insist. She’s… devoted. Thank you for taking us this far.”

“It was a delight, my lady. Feel free to call us any of us if you need help in the future.”

“Of course. And Waterfall, thanks for showing us to Zecora’s lab. Now we can actually ask permission for what we took.”

“Whenever you come back, feel free to ask for me again,” Waterfall said. Our two guides departed, leaving us to walk over to the loneliest corner ever.

“What are you going to do if she says no?” the wannabe-horny mare asked as we walked.

“What makes you think I’ll give her the option of saying no?”

“Greetings once more, my lady,” Luna said when we were at a socially acceptable distance. “I wasn’t aware you were coming to the fort today.”

“I have a really bad habit of getting sidetracked. Zecora, do you mind if I borrow one of your horns to help a disabled old mare?”

“You say borrow. I believe you mean take.”

“Look at her. She’s old and rickety. You’ll obviously outlast her and I doubt she’ll care if you take it back when she’s done.”

“...That one may have been a little too far,” Kat whispered as everyone else stared at me in silence.

“Fine. Do you mind if I take one of your horns to help a disabled old mare?”

“The loot from a battle belongs to the chieftain first and foremost, does it not?” Zecora asked. “Take what you like, my lady.”

“Cool. How’s progress on clearing out the undead in the bunker?”

“Slow but steady,” Zecora replied. “Thank you for allowing me to take the time to do this properly. I truly, honestly think that helping the dead pass on will make the world a better place.”

“Given what I know of the world, I’m inclined to agree,” I said. “From my understanding, the war that eradicated humanity killed so many people at once that a large number of souls got stuck on this side. That’s the reason so many cities are in the same place and have very similar names. Zecora, for the sake of eradicating the bullshit punny naming system, you need to help all the dead pass on. That means taking a few apprentices.”

“The skills I possess can't be taught to just anyone. I have every intention of taking an apprentice as soon as I find one who can and is willing to learn.”

“Luna, can you learn to work with the spooky scaries instead of eating them for magical power?”

“...I feel like turning them into magical power would be a faster and easier way of eradicating the punny naming system you detest so much, my lady. If we hunt down all of those troublesome spirits, wouldn’t that solve the issue?”

“Blaze, activate Luna’s empathy for me.”

Her eyes lit up orange and she scoffed. “Why should we feel empathy for the dead?” Blaze asked.

“Aren’t you supposed to be the honorable warrior type? Doesn’t that imply a sense of spirituality?”

“Let me rephrase that, then,” he said. “Why should I feel empathy for convenient sources of easy yet incredible power?”

“I wish you knew what movies were so you could understand how much like a stereotypical villain you sound like right now. Literally everybody knows that convenient sources of easy yet incredible power are always either cursed or have a massive or even fatal downside that’s not immediately apparent. The only people who agree to use cursed and damned souls as sources of power, assuming other options are presented, are obviously the bad guys.”

“My lady, aren’t you planning on creating a blood gem farm using captured monsters?” Kat asked.

“Monsters aren’t sapient. Any curse or downside I get from that won’t be as big of a deal. So, I guess Luna’s out as an apprentice. How will you know when you find the right person?”

“I can tell by what’s around them,” Zecora said. “Those who have a connection to the other side are often surrounded by spirits. I’ve seen a few before, but none that were in a position to become an apprentice. Taya could learn it, since she’s been so heavily immersed in death.”

“Wait, is this something you’re born with or something that you unlock by doing certain things?” I asked.

“It could be either,” Zecora replied with a shrug. “I was born with a connection. The voices kept me company at all times and helped raise me. Those like Taya have forced the connection through bloodshed or repeated contact with the other side.”

“Wouldn’t that also apply to me?” I asked.

“Without a soul, you couldn’t connect without assistance,” Zecora said. “That said, not having a soul does give benefits. For example, you could likely actually go to the other side. Or at least, a few of them.”

“Wait, I can teleport to heaven?”

“Who knows?” Zecora asked with a shrug. “I just know that objects can pass back and forth. In this particular case, object refers to anything lacking a soul. The smaller it is, the more likely it is to happen by chance. That means things like bits, socks, and quills get sucked in a lot more often than planets. It also means that, given the right conditions, you could go through.” We need to hurry up and find those conditions so I can abandon this hell and chill in paradise for eternity.

“How do you like your armor?” Luna finally asked, looking at the runic mail I was wearing.

“It’s much nicer than a dress. Oh, that reminds me. Kat, your arm?” She held out one of her paws, so I gripped it and used a knife to slice into her flesh. As soon as her blood started dropping, the runes on my armor lit up. “There, you did get to be first. You’re welcome.”

“Th-thank you f-for the honor, m-my lady,” Kat whispered, clutching at her bleeding arm.

“Tch, lucky,” Luna muttered. Her horn lit up and Kat’s blood ceased falling. “I’m next!” She offered up one of her hooves, so I took it and sliced her open next. “I advise you to order the guards around us to offer up a sacrifice as well.”

“Good idea.” I turned around to face the rest of the room. Several guards were staring at me in horror. I grinned. “Everybody listen up!” I called out. At this point, they all knew what I sounded like, so everyone shut up and looked over to me. Their eyes all widened when they saw the bloody knife in my hand. “The armor I’m wearing grows more powerful the more sources of blood I have. I’m looking for volunteers only to let me cut them just a little, whereupon you’ll be healed almost immediately by Luna.”

“...You promise it won’t steal our souls?” one of the less cowardly guards asked.

Background characters don’t have souls. “I… Wait, Luna, does this armor steal souls?”

“No, just life force.”

“I promise this armor doesn’t steal souls,” I said.

I wasn’t expecting it, but most of the guards in the room actually volunteered. In fact, a few got a lot more into it than I liked and had to be dragged off by their friends. Apparently being cut on by a big strong predator is a fetish for some stallions.

By the time I finished, the runes were all glowing dull red, making my armor look surprisingly futuristic. “If only it were chrome,” I muttered.

“You want armor made of chrome?” Luna asked, tilting her head.

“Well, everything is made of chrome in the future, from what I hear. Anyway, I think that was the last of the volunteers. Luna, can you help ferry us home? It shouldn’t take but a moment, unless I get sidetracked again.”

“Of course, my lady.” Kat started to reach for my arm, but Luna’s magic stopped her. “Kat, be extremely wary about touching our lady right now. The armor is granting her more strength than usual, so it’s entirely possible she’ll hurt you on accident.”

“That’s a risk I’ll happily accept,” Kat replied. Luna shrugged and released her, allowing Kat to wrap her arm around mine.

“I’ll do my best to be careful. Let me see…” I lifted my arm up. Kat held on tighter, so I easily pulled her into the air. “Wow, yeah, I’m a lot stronger than I should be. I don’t think I could just pick you up like this before. Say, do you think something like a mace might be better to use than a sword, with the extra strength?” I set Kat back down, but she didn’t release her tight grip.

“If you’re going to cross train with any melee weapon, it should be a pole arm of some kind,” Luna said. “You didn’t seem to like the bardiche I made you. Maybe a halberd or a spear?”

“If you’re talking about for use while riding you, I’d prefer either a spear or a naginata.”

“A spear would be more ideal,” Luna said. “In a pitched melee, you might not have as much room to swing, but stabbing should pose no problem. And once you learn enough, you can use a spear to cut nearly the same as a sword can.”

“All fair points. The last fight I had with Nestorats showed me that I really don’t want to get too close to my opponents, especially when they’re literally made of fire. Keeping them at spearpoint will be better than keeping them at swordpoint. Do you know any runes for one?”

“I don’t know any special runic combinations, but I can give one a few special effects. It might take us a while to find enough chrome for it, but I promise—”

“I was joking about the chrome. Use whatever’s best. And thank you. Now let’s go home.”

“As you wish, my lady.”

“Before you go, I wanted to ask something of you,” Zecora said.

“Go for it,” I replied.

“Do you remember the potions of magic regeneration I created, the ones that Luna praised as revolutionary?”

“Yes.”

“I have enough supplies to create one more batch of those potions. I wanted permission to give them to Jonathan to see if he can duplicate them.”

“Granted. However, don’t tell him what they’re for. I don’t trust that thing. I want a few cards up my sleeves it doesn’t know about.”

“Understood. For now, I’ll keep the recipe a secret. We can discuss the issue again if mass production becomes possible.”

“Agreed. If it gets to that point, let me know and we’ll talk about it.”

“...You discovered a potion that restores magic?” the old mare quietly asked.

“I did,” Zecora said with a nod.

“Perhaps living so long in the tower truly was a mistake…” the mare whispered, hanging her head.

Given that you’re resorting to borrowing a dead unicorn’s horn, you should have realized this sooner. “The things happening around me are probably a special case,” I said. “I doubt there are many others out there conquering ancient human ruins and looting them dry. Or exploring the world enough to find all the ingredients necessary for rare potions. Oh, Zecora, does that potion help restore real magic, or just fake unicorn magic?”

“Real magic doesn’t need restoration,” Luna said. “Using it just makes you tired. Fake unicorn magic uses the horn and a few other internal things as catalysts, so potions can actually help restore it.”

“Fake unicorn magic?” the mare said, tilting her head. “I know Athena and Hera were able to do magic without a horn, but to call what we do fake seems unfair.”

“Fake is definitely the wrong word,” Luna confirmed with a nod. “It’s less that the magic is fake and more that it uses a catalyst to accomplish what would normally require sheer force of will. That means it’s considerably easier. It also limits what you can do, because not all magic can be accomplished with just internal catalysts. Thus, unicorn magic is weaker and less versatile than true magic. But since that was the goal, it’s ideal.”

“Wait, the goal was to make it weaker?” the mare asked.

“Obviously,” I said. “Celestia didn’t want to risk anyone becoming more powerful than she was, so she had to censor the history of true magic. I think the official reason was the founding of Equestria, though. After Grogar chased the ponies from the area around the Crystal Empire by fixing the environment, Celestia was wary of anyone doing any more big changes that might require her ponies to have another mass migration. Luna probably knows a lot more than I do, though.”

“I didn’t realize Grogar fixed the environment,” Luna said. “I thought he broke it to chase the ponies out…”

“Nope. The north and south poles are supposed to be cold. It looks like Grogar is going around the world, trying to fix macro issues like weather problems and curses on areas of land. Some time after fixing the north pole, it looks like he went to the south pole to chase down leads on all the evil undead energy that was gathering in the human ruins there. But he couldn’t get inside because the ruins were sealed, so it seems he decided to go to Tartarus to hit up the lake of magic. I don’t know if he’s trying to purify Discord’s corruption on the lake or if he’s trying to use the lake for a power boost in order to gain access to the human ruins, though. I’ll have to ask when we invade. With luck, we can get him to help fix the curse on the middle east, too.”

“More human ruins… A lake of magic… A curse on the middle east… A possibly good lich…” The mare from the tower was muttering a bunch of stuff, but we all ignored her.

“...Why would a lich be doing all of that?” Luna slowly asked.

“That’s something else I want to ask him. My two thoughts are that he became a lich to have more time to fix problems or after becoming a lich, he grew bored and decided to do some good in the world. Either way, that’s something else we can ask. Anyway, we got way off track. Luna, we’re leaving.”

“Understood, my lady.” She finally stood and began walking to the teleport circle. We followed, though Zecora had to poke the mare to get her to start walking. Once everyone was in place, Luna’s horn lit up and we appeared back on the surface. From there, it was just a short walk back to the other teleport circle and then everyone but Luna was back home.