Author's Notes:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Hkt0WrA3sKuhIs7hFxkmu5Xf-gO7ckIhQFVNO4Fp3OM/edit

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I felt marginally better the next morning. My entire mind still felt flayed and I was almost too depressed to get out from under the covers, but I managed to achingly stand. Taya stirred at my movement and sat up with a yawn.

Before she could finish, I grabbed a towel and walked out. She tried scrambling to follow me, but my longer legs prevailed. After all, she didn’t need to watch me take a shower. And unfortunately, I knew she’d be all too eager to anyway.

Apparently someone couldn’t leave well enough alone, though. The lock clicked open a few moments later and my cute little kitty let herself in. “Good morning, my lady!” she happily said, letting herself in and closing the door behind her. “Would you like me to wash your back?”

“No, I’d like you to get out. I locked the door because I didn’t particularly want company.”

“...Well, would you mind if I—”

“Out.”

“At least let me wash your hair! You never do it right and it gets all ratty!”

“How the hell is your oath letting you disobey my orders? Get the fuck out!”

She finally sighed and left, leaving me in peaceful silence. I took a wonderfully long shower, finally rinsing myself of Aqua’s stain. It felt nice.

When I got back to my room, Kat and Taya were sitting on my bed. My kitty was brushing my filly’s tail, probably trying to make it look appealing. I walked in and closed the door without a word.

“...You don’t usually yell,” Kat quietly said.

“If you don’t want to be yelled at, learn to follow orders.”

“Maybe you should take advantage of your vassals!” Taya said. “I thought you liked Kat playing with you!”

“Only when I’m in the mood. And I’m never in the mood to be disobeyed.”

“...Your lack of trust hurts,” Kat sighed.

“What about that implies lack of trust?”

“You are so obviously in pain, my lady! And you don’t trust me to take care of you!”

Taya groaned and I coldly replied, “I don’t want to be taken care of. If that’s the fate I wanted, I would have sooner stayed in Aqua’s grasp!” Kat’s ears shot down and she shut up. I finally started getting dressed, eschewing armor in favor of a large shirt and pants.

“So what’s the plan for today, mommy?” Taya asked.

“How are things at the fort?”

“They’re going well,” Kat said. “Though we did have some issues late last night…”

“With spirits?”

“Sort of. Zecora seemed fairly upset at how Shining Armor and Luna dealt with them. She called it a heinous crime against nature and a final insult added to a million lifetimes of misery.”

“Sounds about right. What calmed her down?”

“Showing them how to do it the right way. Luna is disappointed we aren’t getting a large supply of very powerful spirit gems, but everyone feels more at ease doing it Zecora’s way.”

“Which is…?”

“No clue,” she said with a shrug. “It’s a lot slower, but it seems to leave some parts of the bunker feeling less spooky.”

Go figure. “We’ll discuss our options when we get back down. But if there’s no immediate emergency, I think I’ll hold off on going down for now. What about Twilight? She find anything?

“Again, sort of. She found some kind of energy signature, but they haven’t found a way to get to it yet.”

“What’s the holdup?”

“It’s under a mountain.”

“What are the waters doing?”

“Helping scout the bunker.”

“Would four waters be enough to cut a way through the rock and into the mountain? They could dig straight to the source.”

“That would be sufficient,” Kat said with a nod. “They are being dispatched as we speak.”

“Is Jonathan still behaving?”

“He is remarkably docile for one who was so recently trying to murder us. He has returned to work at the fort like nothing is amiss, activating all of his brethren still in barrels. The queen on the ship has helped him refill the fort and he is using the bugs to great effect.”

“Have the elementals been grilling him?”

“Of course. He’s had answers for almost all of their questions, even if many of them are useless.”

“Have Luna and Shiny been getting along?”

“They have done little interacting. They both agreed things would be better that way. Some of the day guards have been complaining about the way we operate, including the fact that Luna is here at all.”

“They can cry me a river.”

Taya’s eyes turned blue. “Be wary of upsetting your allies,” Flo said. “They came to assist when many would not. That is not something to lightly spurn.”

“Eh. I’m gonna go find Gilda.”

“I’ll ask Sunny to make you breakfast,” Taya said, sliding off Kat’s lap.

“Ask her to make us breakfast,” I said.

“I already ate, silly!” she replied.

I looked over at Kat, who nodded. “Whatevs.” They let me leave and I wandered on down the hall, hunting for the elusive princess belly.

Although given how often she was all too happy to give it up, I guess it didn’t really count as elusive anymore.

I found her where I expected to: In her room. It looked like she had just rolled out of bed when I knocked. “Good morning, Navi,” she said.

“Howdy. We have successfully pacified the fort. You’re welcome to join the next group heading down.”

“I shall ready myself at once!” She started to close her door, but then thought better of it. “Unless you’d like to give me an early morning belly rub…”

“To be quite honest, I don’t think your body could take the raw fury I need to get out on something,” I said with a shrug. “At least, not if you actually wanted to go down to the fort today.”

“That sounds like a challenge!”

“I’m gonna pass this morning,” I said. “To be honest, I’m really not feelin’ it right now.”

“...Is something the matter?”

“Not anymore. I’m sure you’ll get more information at the fort.”

“Ah. Then I shall prepare.” She finally closed her door. By that point, I knew breakfast would be getting close, so I wandered on down to the kitchen.

Sure enough, Sunny was plating eggs and bacon as I walked in. She floated them my way with her standard grin. “Good morning, my lady!”

“Thanks, fam.” I grabbed the plate and continued walking down the hall. I considered going up to the top and dropping the food off the side, followed by myself, but I knew Flo wouldn’t let me. Instead, I went back to my room, where Taya and Kat were once again waiting. I sat on the bed and started eating as petulantly as I could.

“So when are we returning to the fort?” Kat asked.

“As soon as Gilda is ready to go. Taya will take you two down.”

“...Are you going to stay on the ship?” Taya asked.

“For now. I’ll join Twilight’s team when they manage to dig to the power source. I want to see what’s up. Who else is on the ship?”

“Scoria and Silence woke up last night, so they’re back with their squads,” Kat said. “That’s why Sunny and Amber are back up here. Black Fate’s squad is here to rest. Sentinel is with Twilight. Spike is also still on the ship, though I’m not sure why.”

“You two should go get ready,” I said. “I don’t think Gilda will take long.”

“I have everything I need!” Taya said. “Although if you wanna give me the amulet…”

“I don’t think we’ll be needing that,” I said.

“And I won’t take long to ready myself,” Kat said. “I think my time would be better spent brushing my lady’s hair.”

“Knock yourself out,” I said, finally going back to eating. Kat pulled a brush out so quickly that I was afraid to ask where she had it hidden. She pounced into my hair and started purring as she brushed it.

“I think you’re going to make a very pretty queen, mommy!” my daughter said. “And I’m going to love being your precious little princess!” That made Kat snort. Luckily for her, Taya didn’t hear it.

“Yep,” I said with a nod. “Forever and ever.” My cursed little eternafilly, destined to never grow up. All because an insane elemental wanted to make me look bad.

“She was fucked in the head well before I got involved,” Aqua said. “Really, you have only yourself to blame.”

Bimbo mode. Aqua sighed in utter disgust.

“Isn’t it just so wonderful?” Taya sighed, sounding so pleased with herself. “We’re gonna be so happy together, mommy! Isn’t that cool beans?”

“...I guess technically, but that’s not really how it’s used.”

“Well, we can use it however we want in our new kingdom,” she said with a nod. “And we can make sure it spreads, too. It’ll feel just like home!”

“I’d prefer we didn’t. I like being able to confuse people on a whim.”

“That’s just obtuse,” Kat said. “Communication is the means by which we share ideas. What’s the point of even bothering if all you say is basically nonsense?”

“All of what almost everybody says is basically nonsense,” I replied. “Lies, half-truths, little crumbs of bullshit here and there, the occasional scrap of truth, all in an effort to make themselves seem a certain way. Everybody in this world wants to sell some kind of bullshit, some kind of nonsense. It’s only fair that I get to add to the noise.”

“That… is certainly one way of looking at things,” Kat slowly replied. I finally continued eating in silence. When I finished (which didn’t take too long), Taya snatched the plate from my hand and trotted out, tail wagging. I just slumped down. “Any of us would be happy to listen,” Kat quietly said. “We are here to help you.”

“I’m just so lost, Kat. Surrounded by so many, yet utterly, utterly alone. I just want to stop. Just find somewhere to hide and let the world turn. I know now I can’t do that. Discord is turning me into something. Something like him. He has a plan for me, a horrifying plan. And now my daughter is an abomination. My sweet little filly… My cruel little filly… A nigh-immortal half fae, just like mommy. I just wanted peace. I just wanted quiet. I just wanted to be another face in the crowd. And now I am a cursed monster with a mind no longer my own. I know there are still mutations and horrors to come. There is no going back. I am well and truly broken.”

“To be honest, that all sounds pretty bad,” she said.

“Yeah. It all does.”

“Have you ever stopped to wonder why you feel lonely?” Kat asked. “You are, after all, surrounded by so many who love and support you…”

“And who always want what they think is best for me. People who disobey me. People who betray me. People who lie to me and conspire behind my back. People who have plans for me, their perfect version of me. I’m tired of all the attempts to tie strings to me, Kat. It’s so utterly, utterly exhausting. Ever since I got here, people have been beating me down, forcing me to do horrible things, and making me change. Even now, with the leader of a huge portion of the world literally under my direct control, I still feel oh so helpless. And I’m very tired of it.”

“That… also sounds pretty bad.”

“I bet. That’s okay, though. Soon, everything will be changing.”

“...How?”

“The magical coma. Now that Celestia and Aqua aren’t problems anymore, there’s nothing stopping me from doing it the instant I’m ready. I can finally fix my mind and then get back to business. I just have to not kill myself until then.”

“Are you sure you should rely on such a thing?” Kat asked.

“No. But the best case scenario is that I’m in a coma forever, so I’m okay with it. Worst case scenario is that I wake up, but I guess I can take that risk.”

“Um. Don’t you have that backwards?”

“No. You can never understand how I yearn for the sweet, sweet release of death, Kat. The only thing stopping me from killing myself right now is Flo. Without her, I’d erase Aqua’s personality, then order her to shut my brain down. A permanent coma is a close second.”

“...Oh.”

“Say, if I ordered you to, would you kill me?”

“I would kill myself so I couldn’t obey the order,” she immediately replied. “Please don’t ever say such things, Nav. It… hurts. And I know it would break Taya’s heart.”

I sighed and fell silent again, just staring into space. The brush in my hair was honestly somewhat hypnotic.

After about a minute, Aqua snorted. “If all you wanted was to die, you should have let me keep control. I would have killed you piece by piece!”

Flo, find some way to make her feel pain.

“Oh, I know exactly how to do that. You might want to mute her first.”

No, I want to hear her screams. Don’t stop until she convincingly begs you to.

“Got it.”

The room may have been silent, but the symphony in my head was beautiful.

I didn’t get to sit through all of it, though. Flo muted Aqua for me when Gilda poked her head in. “So when are we leaving, again?” she asked.

“Kat, get ready to go, then find Taya and tell her it’s time to go back.”

“Of course,” she said, finally pulling the brush away. “Are you sure you won’t be joining us?”

“I am.”

“You aren’t going?” Gilda asked as Kat slid out the room.

“Not yet. I’m going to join Twilight’s team when the elementals dig down deep enough. I want to see what they found. If we can get the shield down, we’ll join you.”

“Oh… I was hoping you could give me the tour…”

“Thankfully, it’s pretty straightforward,” I said. “The fort itself is one big loop around a hole in the ground. There’s a ton of sciencey shit in there. You’ll need to get Jonathan to explain everything to you.”

“...Who?”

“The local nanomachines,” I said. “We finally got in communication with them. Well, him. I think you’d enjoy talking to him.”

“Oooh, that does sound interesting. And it was in control of the weather?”

“Sure was,” I said with a nod. “And from the sound of things, he has a way of replicating the effects.”

“Wonderful! Will he share such knowledge?”

“Probs. You’ll have to ask. We found all kinds of shit in there. All I ask is that you be escorted by a unicorn at all times, so you can be teleported back instantly.”

“Then may I request the company of one of the mares here?” she asked. “I know they’ve been itching to explore, too.”

“Go for it,” I said. “If you wouldn’t mind, ask a few of them to go with you to start ferrying more valuables up.”

“Of course,” she replied with a nod. “It’s better we get as much as we can secured quickly, just in case. I will see you when you join us below, Nav.”

“Yep, see you,” I said. She finally dipped out. I fell back into bed.

Taya teleported on top of me a moment later. “Goodbye hug!” she said, wrapping herself around me. I hugged her back because it seemed the motherly thing to do. When she was good and secure, she whispered, “Aqua may be a bitch, but she made the right choice with me, mommy. You’ll see.”

“With luck, I’ll join you back at the fort soon,” I said.

“You know… I bet giving me a belly rub would make you feel better!”

“Unfortunately, everyone’s probably waiting for you up top. It’ll have to wait.”

She sighed, slumping down on top of me. “Fiiine. Really mommy, you’re so difficult sometimes.”

“Yeah, well, I learned it from watching you.”

“I know that’s not true because I learned from you!”

God help us all. But most of all, me. “Good little fillies aren’t difficult, honey. Don’t you want to be mommy’s good little filly?”

“Sometimes. Flo tells me I act bratty a lot. I think that’s kinda fun too!”

“You’re not gonna be a brat for the next thousand years,” I said. “I promise you that.”

“Aww… Well, being a good little filly can be fun, too! You know, as long as I keep getting rewards for it…”

“From the way things are going, soon enough, I’m going to have the whole world in my pocket,” I said. “And I’d be happy to give it all to my good little filly.”

“And that’s why you’re the best mommy ever,” she sighed. “And you always will be…”

It’s like you’re trying to sound creepy.

“Your robot called me creepy, mommy!”

“Flo?”

“I said she was acting creepy.”

“Well there you go, Taya. Don’t act creepy and you won’t get called creepy.”

She finally pulled back, though didn’t actually get off me. “How was that creepy?! I’m just reminding you that we’re together forever!”

“Yes, Flo,” I said. “Please explain.”

“I shall be happy to do so in detail,” she said in presumably both of our heads. “In person. So if she wants to hear the explanation, she will need to stop stalling and join the others up top.”

“I’m just hugging mommy goodbye! How’s that stalling?”

“You forget that you’re my host now, Taya,” Flo said. “I haven’t actually looked into your memories, but I can still quite easily see your surface thoughts. You are hoping they will leave without you, giving you an excuse to stay.”

“Taya, you can teleport,” I said. “I’d make you go anyway.”

“It’s not fair! Spike gets to stay! Why can’t I?!”

“Because Spike is going to be giving me a massage,” I said. “A few days of riding on Luna’s armor is taking its toll, as is constant, though relatively easy, combat. I feel like it’s only fair for me to relax a little after being freed from the most hellish, horrific experience of my life. So I’m going to take some time in relative silence and actually try to unfuck my mind a little.”

“...So you don’t like the sound of my voice.”

“Taya, stop stalling,” I said, finally reaching up to boop her on the nose. “You know I love the vast majority of the things about you. Your voice is one of them.”

“What do you mean, vast majority?!” She finally pulled herself away from me and hopped off the bed. “W-what’s happening?!”

“Your mother said no more stalling,” Flo replied to both of us, walking my filly right out the door. Taya continued complaining on her way down the hall, but I was finally free from having to try to care.

When I could no longer hear her bitching, I finally stood up and brushed as much of the fur off my shirt as I could. After a second, I smirked. “Aqua, use yourself to clean all the fur off me.” She actually obeyed without any sass, sliding her black water out of my head and eliminating all the annoying fur clinging all over me. When it was done, she let herself back in. “So you can be useful. It just requires torture.”

She didn’t reply. Flo finally giggled and said, “She still hasn’t begged convincingly enough, so I didn’t want to bother you with the screams.”

“It’s fine, just keep them low. It’ll help me relax while Spike is doing his magic.” I finally started hearing Aqua again, who sounded like she was wailing. “So how are you hurting her?”

“Overstimulating her mind. I learned when I absorbed your laptop what it can do to us. It’s the only equivalent to pain I’ve found so far.”

“Neat. Make sure she doesn’t get used to it.”

“Don’t worry, Navi. It’s all under control.”

That was oddly comforting. I finally wandered on down to Spike’s room. His door was open and he was polishing his belly. “Good morning, Nav. How you feeling now?”

“Marginally less suicidal. I need a few things from you, Spike.”

“Happy to help!” he replied, finally putting away the polish. “So what do you need?”

“First, I need a massage. Then I need you to fuck me into the ground. Finally, I’ll need another massage.”

“I can do all of those!” he said, hopping up. “So just lie on down and we can get started.”

I pushed the door shut and started removing clothes. “I’m honestly surprised those requests didn’t make you pause.”

“I’ve been waiting for you to ride my dick since you lost yours, Nav. I knew you couldn’t resist.”

“You’re making me consider going to Gourd instead.”

“Oh come on! I won’t brag about it to anyone who’ll listen. And I won’t make you sign any contracts. I also won’t be super clingy or annoying about it. I know that you’re just craving a good hard dicking. It just so happens that I have one I can give you. Plus, I really wanna hear the cute noises you make. Doppel said they were adorable!”

“...Why was she talking about the noises I make in bed?”

“I dunno,” he replied with a shrug. “She shares all kinds of strange things at strange times.”

“Whatever.” I was finally completely naked, so I flopped into his musky bed. “You better keep your promise about not being clingy. If you can do a decent enough job, you might just get a chance to try again.”

“Sounds like a fun challenge,” he said, breathing fire onto his claws. When he finally started pressing them onto my back, I sighed in relief and let him work. Hearing Aqua’s screams in the background really did make it all the better.

When he was finished making me feel all tingly, he took an appreciable amount of time to make me feel like a piece of meat. I had to encourage him a few times to make him actually be rough, but when he got into it, I was in heaven.

I was also covered in several scratches when he was done, but I had Aqua heal them while he began massaging my even more battered body. “So how was that?” he smugly asked.

“More than adequate,” I sighed in delight. “I really do enjoy dragon cocks. It’s just a shame you can’t cum inside…”

“We could use Aqua as a condom.”

“As funny as that would be, not even I will go that far. Now, you are allowed to brag, but only to your Gilda and Gourd. And you can also make lewd yo momma jokes to Taya, but only at your own risk.”

“Yo momma such a slut, I had her begging for more after two times!”

“Yo dick so small, I couldn’t get off properly until you started using it right.”

“Bullshit. I saw it bulging your stomach out! You even complained about it being too big when I tried to put it in your ass! Until you started enjoying it, at least…”

“I will not be slut-shamed on my own ship.”

“I’m not slut-shaming you, Nav. I think it’s hot. And if it makes you feel any kind of better at all, I’ll be happy to keep fucking you for as long as I can.”

“You may not have a magic healing cock, but getting fucked hard is exactly what I needed. That endorphin rush is like nothing else. It’s about the only time I can really feel anything anymore.”

“That’s probably not healthy.”

“Nope. I am wholly and totally addicted to sex again. It wasn’t this bad last time. It’s finally to the point where I basically only have three moods: Angry, horny, and empty.”

“...Then are you sure you should be having so much sex?”

“Hell no, but it’s the only thing I have to cope. Despite possible appearances to the contrary, my life is basically a wreck.”

“I can see why you’d hold that viewpoint. Are you doing anything to change it?”

“Yes. I just need to last until I have time to put the plans in motion. The sex is holding me over until then.”

“So you’re using an addiction as a bandaid again?”

“Yep.”

“That’s dumb.”

“You wanna fuck me again or not?”

He actually took a second to consider that. “...I mean, I’d like to, but… I don’t know if fueling an addiction is a good idea, regardless of the cause.”

“You have an addiction to food, Spike. And an addiction to air. I don’t see you complaining about those.”

“I also wasn’t just talking about how I need food and air to feel things. Attacking the reason you feel nothing seems like a better option.”

“I think you know full well a good chunk of why I’m empty inside.”

“Well, I am one of your oldest friends…”

“Is that the only reason, I wonder…?”

His talons paused before continuing more slowly. “You’ve told me all kinds of stories, Nav. To be honest, most of them sounded unpleasant.”

“I feel like you’ve been doing a little more than listening, Spike. A part of me wonders how much reading you’ve done.”

“I’ve uh… I’ve done plenty of that, t-too!”

“Spike?”

“...I’m sorry for reading your journals, Nav. I knew it was wrong, but… I just wanted to know more about you!”

“And you didn’t think to ask me?”

“Of course I did! You just never told me enough!”

“Did you happen to learn why in your readings?”

“...Yes. You don’t want pity and you don’t want to hurt us. Although it kinda loses merit when you complain all the time about how bad everything is.”

“I don’t complain all the time, just when people try and force me to talk about things. I do throw in the occasional horrifying aside to derail boring conversations, but that’s not the same as complaining.”

“...You know, I thought you would be a lot angrier about this.”

“I’m so used to people not caring about my privacy that it really doesn’t faze me too much,” I sighed. “It’s not like I should seem bothered that one of my best friends stabbed me in the back and couldn’t even be bothered to tell me himself. I guess I’m slightly surprised that you finally apologized without me having to explain that I already knew.”

“That… really stings, Nav. How did you get so good at doing that?”

“Tons of emotional abuse as a child. Having parents like mine makes you really good at being passive aggressive, manipulating people, and wounding others without actually leaving a mark on them. Well, that and a whole other lot of unhealthy habits.”

“I think I need to fuck you a few more times,” he said. “You’re still being really depressing.”

“Fine,” I said. “Depending on how my lady parts feel when you’re done with this massage, I’ll make you a deal. If you outlast me, I’ll pretend to be bright and chipper.”

“And if you outlast me, I’ll be surprised!”

I snorted. “You can do better than that.”

“Hm… I’ll stop hugging you without asking first!”

“Deal.” That made him go back to the massage with renewed vigor, humming quietly and occasionally steaming his talons. So, who’s gonna help me cheat?

“Not I,” Flo said. “You made a deal with a friend. It would be wrong to interfere.”

Fair enough. So Aqua, you’re up.

“She’s still screaming,” Flo said. “Can I stop, Nav? I know she deserves all this and more, but… I still don’t like hurting others.”

Stop. Ask her if she’s learned her lesson.

Flo paused a moment before sighing. “She learned the lesson that you’re more cruel than she ever was. After all, she only hit you once!”

And I only tortured her once. It was just for a long time. Also, unmute. And don’t immediately start yelling.

“Every moment with you is torture!” Aqua bubbled. Apparently water elementals can’t growl well. “Ever since I first moved in, I have gotten nothing but abuse and disdain! Why can’t you be grateful for what I’ve done for you?”

You mean turning my daughter into an abomination? Or maybe attempting to brainwash me and marry me off to Celestia?

“I meant the part where I handed you Celestia on a silver platter, actually.”

Are you… trying to make me kill you?

“N-no, don’t be ridi… Please just end it! I can’t take anymore of this! I just wanna die!”

No can do. But you know what I can do?

“...P-please.”

Boom, you’re happy now. Congratulations. That made her begin cackling so hard she started crying. See there? Do unto others as they threaten to do unto you, Aqua. So put a smile on. Remember: You’re serving the best host ever! We both know you really love me. Now start acting like it.

Her horrifying laughter finally stopped a few seconds later. “Don’t be silly, Navi!” she sweetly said, caressing my cheek. “I’ve always loved you. I just didn’t know how to show it until now. Don’t you worry! I’ll be the best elemental ever!”

I know you will. See there? You don’t need to completely reset your personality and start fresh. We’ll just kill the parts of you I like the least until you’re something perfect.

“I just love the sound of that! What must I do to earn your love, Navi?”

We’ll fix more of your personality later, but I’m just loving the thought of finally weeding out the worst bits.

“Oooh, so am I,” she sighed. “It’ll be wonderful…”

To be honest, I wasn’t expecting that to work. I also wasn’t complaining about the results, assuming she wasn’t trying to fake me out. So of course, I thought, Are you just pretending?

“Nope! I can’t make any attempts to lie, trick, or deceive you.”

Flo?

“She’s telling the truth. After you left, I asked Jonathan more about what he did. One of the details he told me is that she would be incapable of lying.”

Good. Now, freshen up my lady parts, Aqua. And don’t let Spike win.

“But… I love you, Navi! That means I want what’s best for you! And cheating on a deal with a friend is awful. I know you could never forgive yourself.”

I’m sure I’ll find some way to deal with it. Now chop chop.

“This is an… inventive way of dealing with her,” Flo said as Aqua got to work. “Not what I was expecting. You have changed in my time away from you.”

Well, let’s see. Almost getting raped and/or murdered by dragons, being physically tortured by the second largest dragon, being emotionally tortured by the largest dragon, basically being forced to act like a lady, Discord confirming that he made me, getting taken over by Aqua, then finally learning that Discord is trying to turn me into an ally have all taken tolls. I am a purpose-built abomination and I only have more horrors to look forward to. Some people steel up and become heroic to cope with horrific circumstances. I just do anything to win. And when I win, I do anything to make sure my opponent won’t be capable of hurting me again. In this particular case, I want to do it as slowly as possible.

“Spike is right. You do like complaining sometimes.”

I’m sorry for venting my problems to you, Flo. Would you feel better if I—

“Don’t even go there for a moment with me, missy! You know you’re my favorite. That’s why you call me pure.”

Spike rudely butted in before I could come up with a reply, thankfully. “So which do you prefer, Nav? The talons or the d?” (I didn’t capitalize it on purpose, of course)

“Talons,” I immediately replied.

“...That was fast.”

“Your dick is fun, but I prefer knots.”

“I know all kinds of knots we could use! I have to keep Gilda tied up sometimes because she can get… a little too into it.”

“I meant like a knot on your dick, like dogs.”

“Oh. Well mine still made you moan like crazy.”

“I’m not knocking it,” I said. “It definitely gets the job done, don’t get me wrong. I just have preferences.”

“Well, I think I quite enjoy your tight little hole,” he said, sliding a talon down there. “And since you prefer my talons…”

I opened my legs to give him better access and said, “I do hope the big, strong dragon isn’t thinking about adding a unique little lady like myself to his hoard!”

“This big, strong dragon is gonna have a fun time teaching a weak little lady like you her place!”

“You’ll never break me, beast! But I will enjoy you trying!”

He finally snorted and shook his head. “Do you really get off to roleplay?”

“Sometimes. I was mostly joking, but we can do something if you want.”

“...Didn’t you say there were human legends about dragons kidnapping princesses?”

“Sure did. Do you want me to pretend to be a dragon for you, princess?”

“I dunno… I think Princess Navi sounds cute! Although Queen Navi was also pretty adorable…”

“Well… Being pretty can be fun sometimes.”

“There’s nothing wrong with enjoying it,” he said. “Everybody likes to feel attractive. Not all of us can pull it off quite like you, though! When you’re all dolled up and you smile… Oooh, it can make our knees weak, Nav!” He finally sighed and patted me on the thigh. “If only we could show you what we see when we look at you, Nav…”

“It’s… hard for me. You see Nav, but I see… my sister. Slightly older, mutated and misshapen, but still very much my sister.”

“You do her memory proud, Nav.”

“...Let’s just get to the dicking,” I finally said.

“Will you at least try to fight back a little this time?” he asked.

“GIMME DAT DICK!” I screamed, pouncing at him. He only had a moment to look surprised before I dragged him down. Round two finally began in earnest.

Only to end with me as the victor surprisingly quickly, actually. “Come on, Spike,” I said, grinding on his stomach. “You givin’ up so soon?”

“I was bluffing,” he muttered with a blush. “I was almost spent…”

“Woo, no more hugs! Get shit on, nerd!”

“That sounds… really gross. And come on, Nav. I know you like hugs. Especially Pinkie’s! Why won't you let me hug you?”

“It was never about letting you do anything,” I said. “It was about you hugging me without permission while completely and utterly ignoring me when I asked you to stop. That lack of respect is just insulting. Do you keep flirting with a girl after she’s told you she’s not interested?”

“Didn’t you tell me sometimes that no means yes?”

“No, I told you that sometimes girls think that playing games is cute and will tell you no, but want you to keep chasing them anyway. If you find a girl like that, you run the other way, because she’s an immature child who will bring you nothing but trouble. And I shouldn’t have to tell you that if she follows up her multiple requests for you to leave her alone with physical violence, you should really pick a new target.”

“Oh, now it’s coming back to me!” He finally looked down at his stomach, where I was leaking all kinds of lewd fluids. “So uh…”

“Your tummy is really warm,” I replied with a giggle.

“Well, at least your juices smell and taste better than Gilda’s.”

“It’s the diet,” I said. “More fruits and veggies makes it taste better. Pineapple, especially. Eat a lot of it and in a few days, your cum will be a lot sweeter.”

“Very good to know.” He finally wrapped his talons around my waist and set me on my feet. “So, feel any better?”

“Yes.”

“Good. I should probably warn you that you smell like you’ve been thoroughly fucked by a very talonsome dragon.”

“That’s fine. There’s basically nobody on the ship and they probably all would have heard my screams of pleasure anyway. I’ll just take another shower and finally get armored up.”

He finally hopped up and grabbed two towels. “Dibs on the middle shower,” he said. “That water always gets the hottest.”

“Whatever, dude.” I took the other towel, bundled up my clothes, and walked to the closest one. He went the other way, thankfully.

Once I was done with my second shower of the day, I wrapped myself up in the towel and walked down the hall, looking in doors. The guard squad had apparently left at some point, so it was just ship unicorns. When I got to the kitchen, I saw Sunny sitting on the floor and looking bored out of her mind. “Sup, honeybuns?” I said.

She blinked in surprise. “You’re still here?”

“Yep. Do you know how to dry hair?”

“I do.”

“Wanna help me get armored up?”

“I would be honored!” she replied, jumping to her hooves.

“Cool.” I continued walking and she pranced around behind me. When we got to my room, she pushed the door shut with magic and I finally tossed the towel aside. “So dry me out.”

Her horn lit up and the water all pulled away from my body and pooled into a ball. When it was far enough away, it flashed into steam. “Would you like me to do your hair, too? If you leave it alone after drying it with magic, it can do all kinds of crazy things!”

“Go for it.” I sat down on the bed and she hopped up behind me. A brush teleported in and she started running it through my stupidly long hair.

“So how was Spike?” she coyly asked.

“Pretty good. Nice length, great girth, and all kinds of soft spines that feel amazing. And his massages just melt me.”

“Hmm, seems like a nice time! It did sound pretty rough, though.”

“Sometimes a girl just wants to be pounded.”

That made her chuckle. “True, I suppose. Though I’m sure the princess was disappointed you chose him instead…”

“I couldn’t be as rough with the princess. Her poor little belly can only take so many rubs.”

“And I know Twilight won’t approve. She has to stop herself from treating him like a child all the time.”

“Spike’s probably physically about as old as I am, at this point. Mentally and emotionally, I think being around the ponies stunted him slightly. He’s getting there, though.”

“Some mature faster than others,” she said. “He’s changed a lot on this trip.”

My wings sagged and I sighed. “I think it’s changed us all…”

“And brought us all closer together,” she said, placing one of her hooves on my shoulder.

I definitely couldn’t deny that. Since I fell silent, she started quietly humming. It was… strangely soothing.

When brushing my hair got old, she made the brush disappear and started doing something else to it. I couldn’t really tell what, but it felt like she might have been rolling it or something. “You told me once that all Amber had to do was ask,” she quietly said.

“I did. To be honest, it might be a bad idea. I think that mare might need help and I’m not sure giving in to her desires would be good for her.”

“I’ve also heard you giving the occasional flirty comment to guards…” I didn’t say anything. After a few long seconds, she continued, “And you never seem to lack for… ahem, bellies to rub.”

“Bitches love bellyrubs,” I replied with a shrug.

Both of her hooves wrapped around me and she pulled me close. Her fuzzy tummy felt good against my back. “Don’t do this to yourself, Nav,” she quietly said. “One of the first things you told us is not to chase addictions or mindless pleasures to escape our pain!”

“I’m just doing it to get by,” I said. “I have a plan for how to break free. I just need time. Trust me.”

She continued to hold me for a few seconds before finally sighing and releasing me. “Of course I trust you, my lady. That’s all I needed to hear!” Something teleported in behind me and stuck itself in my hair. I hadn’t really been paying attention, but she apparently wrapped the entire thing in a bun. “I used to have really long hair. This will keep it out of the way and off your neck!”

“Awesome.” I stood up and started pulling on my armor.

Sunny began grabbing weapons and placing them on the bed for me. “I can’t believe your vassals usually make you do this alone!”

“I usually tell them to gear up while I do, so we can be done faster.”

She sighed and shook her head. “You need to whip them into shape, my lady. They should already be prepared to go before you give the order! That way, they can help you prepare.”

“I don’t need help to prepare.”

“That isn’t the point,” she replied. “Two pairs of eyes are better than one. All it takes is one mistake, a single forgotten buckle or misplaced knife, to end it all. The pirates would always at the very least check each other over before going out. The closer ones would actually help each other. If pirates can do it, then I’m sure your vassals can!”

“Why would I need them when I have my favorite?” I asked, booping her on the nose. When she squeed in delight, I started putting on weapons.

“I can’t do everything, my lady,” she replied. “Also, please don’t call me your favorite where Kat can hear. She’s… possessive.”

“Do I need to have a talk with her?” I sighed.

“No, it wouldn’t help. So what’s next, my lady?”

“Call me Nav, at least in private,” I said. “Flo, what’s our status?”

“The waters are about halfway to the power source on Twilight’s side,” she replied. “They should be done within twenty more minutes. Zecora is still going slow and steady in the bunker. The spirits they’ve uncovered seem mostly peaceful, thankfully. There haven’t been any monsters like what you faced, though there have been a few hostile ghosts.”

“Fantastic. Do the spirits ignore elementals?”

“They absolutely do not. We actually almost lost Raine to spirits. It slowed our scouting down considerably. Luckily, the hole leads directly to the mall area, so we have plenty of small rooms to tide us over at the moment. Most of the stuff in these rooms has either been looted or destroyed, though.”

“The good shit will be deeper in, probably hidden by false walls.”

“Most of the things we have found were in hidden safes. It seems the other explorers didn’t think to look for them. We’ve been using the ship to move up and down the shaft and have been loading items into it as we find them.”

“Good. Then I’ll be joining Twilight. I want to see what she found.”

“Need me to teleport you?” Sunny asked.

“Do you have a way to teleport to the other ship?”

Her mouth opened, but she paused. After a few seconds, she shook her head. “I actually don’t.”

“Then Twilight should be able to pull me over.”

Sure enough, I instantly teleported into her embrace. “Morning, Navi!” she happily said. “How’d you sleep?”

I hugged her back, since it seemed like the right thing for a special somehuman to do. “Like the dead. It was nice. And for the record, I do want to talk. Now is just a bad time.”

“I know, Nav.” She finally pulled back and nuzzled me. “I have to say, my luck really did you wonders yesterday!”

“Sure did,” I replied. “Want it back?”

“Of course!” With her permission, I finally kissed her. It felt warm and fuzzy.

When she got her fill, she pulled back and let herself drop back to the deck. “So, what’s crackalackin’?” I asked.

“Do you just put random words together sometimes?” Sentinel asked.

“Every sentence is just a jumble of random words,” I replied.

“Yeah, but most of what I say actually makes sense. A good chunk of what you say is just… nonsense.”

“It actually isn’t,” Twilight said. “I’ve been keeping a list and studying them occasionally. They’re surprisingly deep when you dig down into their meanings! In this particular case, she’s asking us what events are presently occurring.”

“The elementals are digging a hole,” Sentinel replied, rolling her eyes. “It leads to some kind of weird energy readings Twilight found.”

“How far are we from the entrance of the dome?” I asked. I actually couldn’t see the dome from here.

“The dome is about a dozen kilometers to the west,” Twilight replied. “The entrance is another few kilometers away.”

“Wow. I thought it would be closer. So what’s their ETA?”

“About ten more minutes,” Twilight said. “If this does turn out to be the way to turn off the shield, I propose we pull both ships up to the fort and hold an all hooves on deck meeting.”

“Agreed,” I said. “I have a few announcements to make and we can decide what to do moving forward.”

“I don’t think we can trust the elementals,” Sentinel said. “If any one of them was willing to do that…”

“If we can’t trust them, we have to kill them,” Twilight said. “And I don’t think it’s come to that yet. Aqua was corrupted by cursed crystals. We found no evidence of anything of the sort while freeing the other elementals. It’s possible that some might be corrupt, but not as bad as Aqua yet.”

“That we know of,” I said. “Jonathan can supposedly repair them. He doesn’t have to actually roll them back to an alpha model. He can just unfuck them.”

“If they’re willing to be unfucked,” Sentinel said.

“I have a feeling they won’t be hard to convince,” I said. “Not after Aqua’s coup. If they don’t see at this point that they’re a threat to us, there’s a problem.” Surprisingly, none of the elementals replied to that. “So how sure are you that this is our target?”

“Pretty sure,” Twilight said. “I was able to trace the energy signature the entire way, so whatever’s here at the very least leads to the dome.”

“I’m surprised we’re the first ones to find this,” I said.

“I’m sure everybody who sees something like this would think the same thing we did,” Twilight replied. “That the energy source had to be inside. I never once imagined otherwise, but it does make complete sense. I think I’d like to know more about the race who constructed this dome and the airship.”

“It might be the same race that occupied the mountains that the minotaurs eventually took over,” I said. “As far as I know, they’re the only ones that called humans forerunners.”

“I’ll have to ask Jonathan for more information,” Twiggles said with a nod. “Shall we start heading down? They should cut through shortly after we get there.”

“Let’s wait,” I said. “I don’t want to be the first one to investigate the strange magical energies from a long-extinct race. It sounds like a good way to be the first ones to die.”

“I am so glad our lady is actually intelligent,” Sentinel sighed. “Most nobles I’ve run into are about as dumb as a box of rocks.”

“I take offense to that,” Twilight said. “Even if it is true. We’re supposed to be respected, not derided.”

“Don’t even start that shit,” I said, booping her on the nose. “Noble titles are just that: titles. An idiot is an idiot, no matter what title they have. Throwing in several generations of inbreeding just makes it worse. Of course, an idiot with a noble title is a lot more dangerous than an idiot without one, so they actually should be derided even more than usual.”

“Be wary about saying that anywhere in Canterlot,” Twilight said. “Even with Celestia under your thumb, statements like that can create problems for you.”

“When I take over properly, there are going to be a lot of changes,” I said. “We’re going meritocracy, not aristocracy. Someone’s parents can be dirt farmers, for all I care. If they’re capable of doing what needs to be done, that’s all that matters. I don’t intend to take any titles away from people unless they actually deserve to lose said titles, but they will lose a good chunk of what power they currently have. Leadership skills aren’t hereditary and we shouldn’t act like they are.”

“...Who farms dirt?” Twilight asked.

“Pinkie’s parents are rock farmers,” I said. “You can’t tell me Equestria doesn’t have dirt farmers, too.”

“I can confirm that,” Sentinel said. “I can barely remember it now, but I knew some dirt farmers in my hometown. Being so poor is part of what drove me to the guard.”

After becoming a bandit, apparently. “And now you’re capable of doing what I need done,” I said, booping her on the nose next. She didn’t look too pleased, but that was okay. “Maybe I should make Celestia knight some of you guys… Something about outstanding heroism in the field.”

“Please do,” Sentinel replied with a nod. “It’s about time we were honored for all that we’ve done for Equestria. Not too many commoners ever rise to the rank of knight.”

“I was mostly joking, but if you actually want it, you better believe you’ll be getting it. Get with Watcher and write me up a list of everyone in your squad that deserves it and what they did to deserve it. I’ll see what I can do.”

“Of course, my lady,” she said, bowing.

“My sisters have uncovered a hollow area,” Flo said in my mind. “It appears to be some manner of control room.”

“Looks like the waters are in,” I said. “Shall we head down?”

Twilight’s horn lit up and the two of us appeared on a large staircase carved into the side of a mountain. “They carved us stairs so we can easily get up and down,” she said as she started walking. After a few steps, her horn lit up and a light appeared above her. I followed right behind her. “It might take us a little while to figure out how to turn this thing off.”

“I bet it’ll be stupid easy.”

“Not everyone labels their big generators with a super obvious on/off button, Nav,” she said.

“That’s dumb. You put a trap on the super obvious one and then label the actual on/off button with something silly, like ‘release angry wasps’.”

“Remind me to never let you become an evil overlord. You’d be way too good at it.”

“Probs. How deep do you think this thing is?”

“Approximately two hundred meters into the mountain. I was barely able to follow the trail. I’m not sure why they chose to put the power source inside a mountain.”

“Who says they did?” I asked. “It’s been who knows how fucking long since then. For all we know, this was just an empty field all those years ago. I do kinda doubt it, but a lot can happen in that amount of time.”

“I bet they were trying to hide the source from Jonathan,” she said. “Imagine how horrifying it must have been to encounter something like that with no knowledge of what you’re dealing with.”

“I’d say it was pretty fucking spooky. Losing an airship of that size with that kind of armament was probably a hefty blow, too. Luckily, their loss is our gain.”

“Assuming we can get the shield down,” she said. “That would give us access to what’s likely the most powerful airship on the planet.”

“Plus easier access to everything of value within the bunker itself. With Jonathan on our side, there really isn’t a reason for us to keep this place. Once we load everything up on the big ship, I vote we just leave and don’t look back. We can implement his nanites in the Everfree to help clean that place up.”

“Do you really think it’s a good idea to leave such a massive fort and subterranean lair unguarded?” she asked. “There’s no telling who or what might move in after we leave.”

“This place is super isolated and pretty much everyone under the sun thinks even laying eyes on it is basically a death sentence. It has no strategic value and getting to it is a bitch and a half. It might not be wise to leave it unguarded, but keeping a bunch of soldiers here on the off chance that someone we don’t like might move in seems like a waste. We can talk to the others about it after we’re done and see what they think.”

“It looks like we’re getting close to the bottom,” she said. She summoned another light and sent it forward. Sure enough, it didn’t take long for it to hit a room. The four elementals were crowded around the entrance. When Twilight sent out more lights, I realized why they hadn’t gone in any further.

Several dozen black pipes covered in glowing runes leading to the floor fed into a thick glass tube full of a glowing orange liquid. I’m pretty sure it was magma. A much smaller white tube led from the magma container to a creature that was bound to a table. The pipe was embedded into its chest. There were two runic wires leading out of its face and back down into the ground. I looked around at the walls and saw that several large runes seemed to hold everything together.

“So did we just discover a torture chamber?” I asked.

Twilight groaned and started trotting forward. No fun allowed, indeed. I followed behind her, because I kinda wanted to poke that thing just to see what would happen. “It’s obviously somehow channeling the earth magic from the lava to keep up the shield,” she said.

“There are no on/off switches,” Ice said. “We made sure to check.”

“Well, this is looking more complicated than I was expecting,” I said. “Although I bet if we pull the plug, so to say, it’ll solve the problem.”

“This thing could be alive, for all we know,” Twilight said. “We can’t just start tearing things apart until we know more.”

“You see an instruction manual anywhere?” I asked.

“No, but I know a few people who know runes a lot better than we do.” Her horn lit up and a camera appeared. “Take some pictures. We’ll show them to Athena and see what she thinks. I’ll run some small magical probes on the body and see what I can find.”

“An elemental could probably tell us everything we needed to know,” I said, looking at my batch of four volunteers. “Who wants to make a host out of an ancient, extinct race?”

“I’d love to be your elemental, Navi!” Ice immediately said, surging forward. I slapped him upside the face when he got close enough. When his head reformed, he sighed in disappointment before approaching the figure on the table. I grabbed the camera and finally started taking pictures.

When I had what I was hoping were enough pictures, I walked back over and took a picture of Twilight’s butt. As soon as she heard the camera go off, she swung around and I handed it back. “Here you go. The last one’s for me, though.”

“Did you really just…” She sighed and took the camera. “Of course you did. I’ll let you take plenty more later, when we’re better prepared.”

“So what’s the dealio with dudeski?” I asked.

“She is alive,” Ice said. “And begging me to kill her.”

“Did she explain how she’s alive?” I asked. “It looks like there’s raw magma pumping into her.”

“The runes on the pipes transform the magma into pure energy, essentially. It pumps into her, and the runes on the wires leading back out constantly siphons that energy out and into the shield. It’s really quite complex and extremely interesting!”

“Is there any way to free her without killing her?” I asked.

“Not that she knows of. As soon as the magic stops pumping through her, she’ll probably immediately disintegrate.”

“Twilight?”

“I think this place bears more study first, but if she’s begging us to kill her…”

“The pain is excruciating,” Ice said. “This was her punishment for leading her ship to ruin. She would atone for her mistake of releasing Jonathan by keeping him sealed for eternity.”

I drew my sword and sliced right through the wires leading out of her face. Her body convulsed once before deflating and finally disintegrating. “Did that lower the shield?”

“It did,” Ice said with a nod. The room we were in rumbled. The runes on the walls started to flicker.

“Twilight, teleport!” We instantly appeared back on the changeling ship with a pop. It took the elementals a few seconds longer to join us. A huge cloud of smoke followed right behind them.

“What happened?” Sentinel asked.

“The thing keeping this place powered was a prisoner being tortured for eternity,” I said, finally sheathing my sword. “We put a stop to it.”

“Please tell me you got everything from her brain,” Twilight said, looking at Ice.

“I did,” he said, turning pink. “It has already been disseminated among the others. Their race was a very interesting and powerful one, fusing human technology with magic. The runes used to power that shield could likely be used to power small towns.”

“We already have something similar,” Twilight said. “We use magic cells. They do have to be recharged by a unicorn every now and then, though. This was running continually for who knows how long.”

“Ice knows how long,” I said.

“I don’t, actually. The perpetual agony warped her perception of time, as did being sealed in an underground tomb.”

“Well, whatever.” I finally looked over to the helmsling and said, “Take us into the crater.”

“At once, my lady.” The ship started moving.

“Tell Gourd to meet us there,” I said.

“They’re already on the way,” Naiad said. “I understand we’re having a meeting. I would like to know what is going to be discussed.”

“It’ll be a status update from all parties,” I said. “Then we’ll discuss how we’ll move forward.”

“I have a suggestion. Now that we have Celestia under our control, we must either ensure that she stays that way or kill her while it’s still easy. I recommend that you move your summit with the other rulers forward, to make it as soon as possible. Your followers can mop up the hostile spirits and continue combing the ruins while you can attend to more important matters. Once you are done, you can rejoin us and claim the vault.”

“Well, the point of the meeting was for suggestions like those,” I said. “And I’m inclined to agree. I really don’t want to explore another fucked up haunted ruin. If it looks like Zecora actually has this handled, I’ll head to the Crystal Empire with Shiny, Twiggles, and Woona.”

“And Taya,” Twilight added for me.

“And maybe a few others. It’ll be like a little vacation.”

“Excellent,” Naiad said. “I also have suggestions for how to deal with Celestia.”

“That will be up to my summit to decide,” I said. “I’m going to put it to a vote.”

“A vote?” Twilight said. “I thought we were still going to kill her!”

“Why? We could just as easily wipe her mind and turn her into the perfect princess instead. The ideal, canon Princess Celestia. You’d finally have your old teacher back!”

“That is… not a suggestion I expected from you, Nav.”

“Yeah, well, let’s just say I’ve had a good little while to think about it. The more shitty things people do to me, the more shitty my methods tend to become. Except for that time I genocided an entire colony with fire, which was pretty extreme, even now.”

“Wait, what now?” Twilight said.

“That was something I told you to stop pestering me about,” I said. “One of the things Celestia ordered me to do for Chrysalis. You remember the diamond dogs who kidnapped Rarity?”

“...Yes.”

“Well, you remember how I have a ton of gems now from a changeling mine?” She sighed and hung her head. “And you remember that time we went to Appleloosa and found a diamond dog in their prison?” She face-hoofed. “It’s okay, though. I later found out they were actually a group of criminals hired by the Dogfather. That kinda made me feel a lot better about the whole thing.”

“Silver linings,” she said with a shrug. “So you really think we could wipe her mind and make her a better princess?”

“Well, it’s not like we could make her worse. We’ll need to keep a close eye on her to make sure she doesn’t get any ideas or have any relapses, but I think we should be good. Again, though, it’ll be up to the council. If we vote to kill her, we’ll put her on trial and execute her. With Aqua in her head, it shouldn’t be hard to make her confess to a laundry list of crimes, lies, and hypocrisies. With it straight from her mouth, there’s not much any royalist supporters could do. Host it in the morning, have her execution immediately after, then a huge party to celebrate the death of the tyrant.”

“I think you’re underestimating how popular the princess is,” Twilight said. “Even with admissions of guilt, we might have a hard time taking over.”

“Which is why I’d prefer to leave her alive if possible. I sure as shit don’t want her job. She can help us fix all the messes she made.” That way I can actually retire in peace eventually.

“I have a suggestion for how to deal with her,” Naiad said. “She should wed someone on the council. That would legitimize your power and ensure she continues to behave.”

“Twilight, you want to marry Celestia?” I asked.

“What?! No! I’ve known her almost as long as I can remember, Nav. She’s almost like a second mother, in some ways.”

“You seemed to have fun when I was a changeling. And you definitely had fun in those dreams…”

Her face lit up bright red. “Because I knew it was just you messing with me! I could never actually… not with her!”

“Well I mean, she’s not biologically related to Luna… And Luna did disown her anyway.”

“Stop being gross! If she should marry anyone, it should be you! With her under our control, you can still keep up your relations with as many others as you want. As long as we’re discreet, there shouldn’t be any issues. You get direct access to all the power you’ll need without anyone in the public ever questioning it. It’s basically an open secret at this point that you two have been on and off lovers.”

“I vote either Fleur or Moonbeam,” I said, crossing my arms. “Moonie could turn Celestia into the mommy she’s always wanted to be. And Fleur could put that power to much better use.”

“Well, that’ll be up to the council to decide,” Twilight said. “I still think we should put her to death for her crimes, but I’ll abide by the vote.”

With the ship’s speed, we were already entering the crater, which had been completely cleared of trees. Finally seeing it from above, without the shield or any plant life, the place felt like a crater on the moon.

The other two ships were docked together, so ours joined them. A few worker bugs from the main ship quickly set up fairly sturdy looking bridges that latched onto both ships. All the important peeps were waiting for us in front of the bridge of the big ship, so that’s where Sentinel teleported us. She left her squadmates behind. Taya immediately latched onto my leg and Kat grabbed the opposite arm.

“How did deactivating the shield go?” Watcher asked.

“Mommy did it, duh,” Taya said.

“It was being powered by a piece of ancient magitech,” I said. “Lava was being pumped up from the earth using runes and stored in a glass tube. It fed into a much smaller pipe that led to a member of that race. The runes on that pipe converted the magma to raw energy, which was forced into the ancient. Two more wires led from its face into the ground, over to the crater. It was… gruesome.”

“Can it be reactivated?” Luna asked.

“Absolutely not,” I immediately replied. “There is no crime that is worth eternal punishment. I set her free.”

“Could that energy be channeled into something else?” Princess Gilda asked.

“I’m going to go with probably,” I said. “The elementals got all of the knowledge from the ancient’s mind and they’re disseminating it now.”

“Our… unique minds find understanding magical runes difficult,” Brook said. “We could draw them instantly, but they would have no power. To be honest, the meaning of each individual rune is lost to us, though we are able to get a general understanding of what they were trying to accomplish when we see certain runes used in certain places. At this point, I am confident that we could easily guide a mortal through constructing a golem of either steel or paper. We could likely help a learned mortal such as Jak through building something like the contraption you encountered. The more we see, the better our understanding will become.”

“So. Blaze. How many ponies can you control?” I slowly asked.

“That depends on how precisely I need to control them,” he replied, crossing his arms. “And I have not been privy to their level of computational power. My understanding of runes is considerably lessened.”

“Twilight, you mind being a bridge?”

“A… bridge?” she asked.

“The waters implant the knowledge in your mind, then Blaze sucks it up.”

“Never!” Aqua immediately shouted. “They can’t be—”

“Bimbo mode,” I said. That shut her up immediately and she went back to her jiggliest form. “Now stand there in silence like the eye candy you are. Remember, the best host ever shouldn’t be questioned.”

“To answer the question, I don’t mind at all,” Twilight said. “I would be quite interested in learning how to craft them. It shouldn’t take me long to make a few books detailing the processes.”

“This is legit the best powerup ever,” I said. “I gotta say, going from basically a slave to essentially a god has been one wild fucking ride. Now I’m gonna have a full, mostly invincible golem army!”

“That’s still a lot of steel,” Twilight said.

“Luna, you know any spells to hunt for metal in the ground?”

“I do,” she said with a nod.

“We’ll use this ship as a mobile mining and crafting base,” I said. “The bugs can harvest resources from all over the continent and we can house an army of craftsmen to turn them into everything we’ll need for our invasion of Tartarus. We already have a lot of clone ponies that Aqua and Celestia made that we’ll need to get rid of. We can give them to Blaze for now and let him use them to craft either weapons or golems. This ship is probably way too big to fit into the Tartarus portal, but we can park it right outside the portal and push through full armies of ponies in runic gear, each squad controlling its own steel or paper golem. If we want, we could push through the materials we’d need to make a sky fleet and use that to teach the so-called demons in there the true definition of hell.”

When I was finished, Twilight actually moaned. “You just turned me on more and more with each sentence, Nav! Oooh, that sounds wonderful!” Her brother turned bright red and face-hooved.

“So, about that marriage,” Gilda said, leaning forward. “I’m picturing red and pink roses and two beautiful gowns…”

“You may be getting ahead of yourself,” Luna said. “We still need to clear out the bunker. As wonderful of a plan as that is, we currently have higher priorities.”

“We do,” I said. “Zecora, what’s the status of cleansing the bunker?”

“It goes… slowly,” she said. “I do not think these spirits were in as much pain as those you encountered before. Some seem hostile, but most are happy to be freed. I do hear darker things from within, things that I would not feel comfortable facing alone.”

“Slow and steady is the name of the game,” I said. “Right now, there’s no real hurry. Being careful is more important. Gourd, how’s our food stocks?”

“The fort has everything we need to survive for as long as we need,” Gourd said. “And Jonathan said he could easily grow more if we start running out.”

“Watcher, how are the troops?”

“On top of the world,” he said. “You’ve led them through another hopeless fight without a single loss. They know we aren’t out of the woods yet, but they’ve taken your stories about the other bunker seriously. I’m fairly confident none of them will get cocky and overextend.”

“Shiny, how are your guys?”

“Concerned. They certainly see the value in working with you, but they aren’t used to adventuring and they certainly aren’t used to your… different… Um…” He took a quick look around and finally said, “You know what, never mind. They’re fine.”

“Her different what?” Twilight asked. “Nav is always open to constructive criticism.” That made Flo snort. “You know, in public.”

“Your crew horrifies them,” Shiny finally said.

“Fucking tell me about it,” I sighed. I’m sure that probably took several people aback, so I didn’t leave them any time to bitch. “So as I’m sure most if not all of you are aware, Aqua implanted herself in me against my will about two to three weeks ago. Right before Twilight and I left for the festival. As of now, I know for sure that she changed my mind without me noticing to force me to do two things. I’ll be grilling her later to learn how much else she influenced. Until now, we’ll just assume all of my stupid decisions in that period were caused by her trying to make me look bad. All of the good decisions were those times I was able to slip shit by.”

“That’s a bold assumption,” Shiny said.

“I stand by it. What not all of you might be aware of is that she took Celestia as a host first. And Celestia didn’t manage to escape like I did. That puts her under my complete control.”

“So what are we going to do with her?” Watcher asked.

“Death unto tyrants!” Gilda said. “For what she has done to my kind and so many more, she deserves no less!”

“That brings me to the final point of this little meeting,” I said. “I’m taking Luna, Twilight, Taya, Brook, Aqua, and maybe Princess Gilda to the Crystal Empire. Shiny will teleport back and let Cadance know we’re coming. I’ll contact Fleur, who will join us with Blossom. I’ll also get in touch with Moonbeam and let her know it’s time. We’ll decide what to do with Celestia there. When we’re done, some of us will go confront Celestia, gloat a little, and then handle her. We’ll discuss things again after that and see where we all stand.”

“Of course I’ll go!” Gilda said. “The technology here can wait. That meeting will be world-changing!”

I turned to Sketch, only to see that he hadn’t joined us. “Anyone know if the changeling ship will fit all of us?” I asked.

“I’d like to teleport back with Shiny,” Twilight said. “It’ll let me spend some time with him and his family.”

“And I shall stay here for now,” Luna said. “My assistance might be needed. I will teleport to the Crystal Empire when the elementals tell me you have arrived.”

“Then it definitely won’t be a problem,” Gourd said. “The guest rooms are actually very nice. They… kinda skimped on the crew’s rooms, though.”

I unbuckled my sword and handed it to Kat. “You know how to use this?”

“I never really trained with a sword quite like it, but I should have no issue taking down a few ghouls. However, I’d prefer to be by your side.”

“Your curse could be really useful here. There are a lot of hidden doors. If the elementals ever find one they can’t open, you can force the issue.”

“...Very well.” She pulled herself closer and wrapped her tail around mine.

“Why am I going?” Brook asked.

“As a representative of the elementals.”

“What?” Blaze asked.

“Brook is an alpha elemental. If I order her to be unbiased, she’ll have to be.”

“Nor would I ever make a decision that might harm you,” Brook said. “I am inclined to agree with Nav’s proposal that Jonathan should search the rest of us for corruption and fix us all. It is obvious to see that many of us are dysfunctional in one way or another. We cannot allow another Incident.”

“And I am inclined to force the issue,” Luna said, stomping an armored hoof onto the deck. “You will either be fixed or you will be considered broken and eliminated!”

Everyone turned to me. As much as I wanted to agree with her, I knew it would be unwise. “I would never deliver an ultimatum to an ally,” I said. “However, I’ll tell you right now, if I ever find out that another elemental took a host without permission, I’m having you all hunted down and exterminated. Unless, of course, you consent to being fixed.”

“How is that not an ultimatum?” Mist asked.

“Because it’s just a warning,” I said with a shrug. “If you want to stay as you are now, you better not take any unwilling hosts.”

“We’ll put it to a public vote, here and now,” Brook said. “Elementals only, please. Who thinks we should allow any possible corruption to be purged from us?” Surprisingly, every single one of them lifted an appendage, even the two fires. “We submit, Nav. We will allow Jonathan to restore us.”

“Excellent. Where is he?”

“In the fort, creating more of himself to replace his losses,” Brook said. “We will go as soon as the meeting is concluded and I will join you on the Ambassador before you depart.”

That went better than I was expecting.

“Making it public forced our tendrils,” Flo said in my head. “Those who might have found it distasteful knew that disagreeing publicly after what Aqua did would make them pariahs.”

“Anyone else have anything to add?” I asked.

“How are you feeling now, Nav?” Watcher asked.

“Much better than I was a full twenty-four hours ago,” I said. “I am free at last and the world is finally starting to turn again.”

“...Good.”

“Yep. Anyone else?”

“Would you like my soldiers to stay behind?” Shiny asked.

“I’ll leave that up to them. If they don’t want to work with my crew, we can send them on their way. If they’re willing to stay, that’s also fine. At this point, I’m leaving Watcher in charge, so they’d at least have a proper military leader.”

“These ponies are soldiers, Nav,” Shiny said. “They aren’t used to being given a choice.”

“I’m sure they’ll survive.”

“Do you want any guards to go with you?” Watcher asked.

“I’m going to what’s probably one of the safest places on the planet where I’m regarded as pretty much the biggest hero ever. I’ll be accompanied by Equestria’s sword and Celestia’s personal student. I’ll be meeting with the ex-captain of the Equestrian guard and his uber-powerful love goddess wife, alongside an ancient and immensely powerful fae of hunger. I honestly don’t think of any place where I might possibly need guards less.”

“A simple no would have sufficed,” Watcher stuffily replied.

“Yeah, but then everyone else would have chimed in with unwelcome passive-aggressive bullshit about how I must always be protected no matter what and to ever suggest otherwise is heresy.”

“My ex-sister does not surround herself with guards for protection,” Luna said. “She does it to show off her power. Appearances are important. Having bodyguards makes it seem to others like you are a figure worth protecting.”

“Thankfully, I still have that covered,” I said. “Since, you know, my most powerful vassal is going to be there with me. Alongside my new pet war hero elemental.”

Gilda snorted. “It would be utterly humiliating to be killed by that thing in its so-called bimbo mode.”

“Hopefully she’ll start behaving and I won’t have to use it as often. If not… Well, I have ways of making her more compliant. Anyone else got shit to bitch about?” After a second or two, I blinked. “I mean, anyone else have any questions?”

“Without me here, my griffins might not be interested in staying,” Gilda said. “I would be quite happy to leave them behind, though.”

“Well, there isn’t room on the changeling ship for them,” I said. “I’m sure someone would be happy to teleport them wherever they wanted to go. Tell them that an extremely important political summit is being held there and you have to represent the griffins.”

“That should work. I shall return to the ship and pack what little I brought.”

“There’s where Taya and I are headed next,” I said. “Anyone else?” Please tell me no. Surprisingly, no one spoke up. “Then we’re going to go pack. I plan to leave as soon as we’re all ready.”

Before anyone could speak up, Taya teleported the three of us back. “Everyone always complains so much,” Taya said. “They really should just learn to accept what you say, mommy.”

“Sometimes that would be nice,” I said, petting her mane. “Now let’s go pack so we can get underway before they can bitch some more.”

“...You can pet me, too,” Gilda quietly said. “I-in private, o-of course…”

“I can pet you in public, too,” I said, doing just that. Her face lit up bright red, but she didn’t try to stop me. She gasped when I started scritching the back of her neck, but quickly relaxed and let herself enjoy it. “See there? Isn’t that nice?”

“Oooh, yes! B-but in p-public?!”

“There’s nothing wrong with pampering your princess,” I said. “And nothing says pamper more like making you putty in my gifted hands.”

“Why do you think I’m her daughter-pet?” Taya smugly asked. “Mommy’s wonderful hands have been all over me!”

I quit playing with the princess to tickle my filly. “I just love making her squeal,” I said.

“While I am still hard-pressed to approve of such a thing, I am beginning to understand it,” Gilda said. “I could quite easily lose myself in her hands! Soft enough to pet, yet hard enough to scratch! It is truly a match made in heaven.”

Since Taya was starting to look more angry than giggly, I finally stopped. “Yeah, they’re great. Now let’s get to it. You still need to find your soldiers and explain what’s up.”

“Very well.” We finally started moving downstairs.

I didn’t have much clothing, so I just grabbed everything I had and started stuffing it into a bag. Sunny walked in and stopped me with magic as soon as she realized what I was doing. “Nav, you have to fold them!”

“...Why?”

“So they won’t be wrinkly! Ugh, I can’t believe we left Doppel behind.” She started pulling the clothes back out and flattening them out on the bed. “I’ll… Wait, why are you packing?”

“I’m taking the changeling ship north, to the Crystal Empire. Now that Celestia is under our control, I want to decide what to do with her before she finds a way to free herself.”

“Why are you taking their ship?!”

“It’s faster and I want to leave this one behind to support Watcher.”

“...Oh. Well, I’m sure you’ll need a cook! I’ve seen Doppel try to help in the kitchen before. It wasn’t pretty.”

“I’m pretty sure they’ll need a cook here, too.”

“Spike and one of Watcher’s guards are fully capable of cooking enough meals for everyone we’re leaving behind. But our lady and her daughter, not to mention Princess Gilda, deserve proper meals on the trip.”

“Fine, whatever. Go pack.”

“After I finish helping you,” she said, finally starting to actually fold my clothes.

Since she had the clothes covered, I grabbed Athena’s book and set it on the bed, then pulled out the magic mirror. “I’m going to talk to Moonie for a sec,” I said.

“I won’t interrupt.”

“Moonbeam.” The mirror showed me the ceiling. A drone suddenly appeared and grabbed it.

Watching it flying around quickly got disorienting, so I looked away until I finally heard my sweet queen’s voice. “Greetings, Navarone. How goes the campaign?”

“Extremely well. I have a lot of very important news.”

“One moment.” Her horn lit up and she appeared back in her room. “I’m all ears.”

“I’ll start with the least important stuff. First off, we’ve successfully made contact with a friendly human AI that was guarding the bunker in the Zone. We also managed to disable the big forcefield. All that’s left now is to deal with the ghosts in the bunker. With Luna and my shaman working together, I’m confident we’ll secure the vault within a month.”

“I see. Has it been worth the effort?”

“Absolutely. We captured a fort, we captured the means with which to grow infinite trees and food, we’ve captured an absolutely massive airship crewed by an extinct species of bugs, we’ve obtained tons of magical artifacts and blood gems, we’ve gained another powerful ally who’s capable of manipulating matter before our eyes, and the list just keeps going on.”

“It sounds… too good to be true.”

“You know the legends about the Zone. The entire atmosphere under the dome was utterly artificial, changing entirely on just a whim. The AI could create storms and tornadoes, grow trees and change them however it pleased, and was able to feed an entire fort and bunker stocked completely full of mindless slaves of those who attacked the fort before us. It took us a while to make contact with him because he fought us so vehemently.”

“It sounds like quite the tale. I’m going to enjoy hearing it in person.”

“And of course, I saved the best news for last. About two or three weeks ago, one of the water elementals forcefully took me over.”

“That… does not sound like good news.”

“Oh, it wasn’t. In fact, it was super shitty. But when we made contact with the AI here, he put her under my control.”

“That is good, but it hardly sounds like the best news.”

I finally grinned. “She took Celestia over first. So now Celestia is under my complete control.”

“Wonderful! Truly well done, Navarone! You have accomplished what no one else in over six thousand years could. I take it that is why you are packing?”

“You take it correctly. Now that Celestia is ours, we need to decide what to do with her before she has a chance to break free. It’s time to meet at the Crystal Empire. I’ll be leaving on the Ambassador as soon as I finish packing.”

“I shall be able to teleport. What is your ETA?”

“I’m not sure yet.”

“Four days,” Sunny said, completely breaking her word not to interrupt. “That’s how long it should take to get there, now that we know the paths to take.”

“Four days,” I said. “We’ll be joined by Luna, Twilight, Brook, Aqua, Shiny and Cadance, Captain Blossom, Princess Gilda, and Fleur.”

“Your little coup really took off, didn’t it?”

“In ways I truly never expected. Will that timing be alright for you?”

“I wouldn’t miss this for the world. I must say, you really made my day, Navi.”

“Happy to hear it, Moonie. I think that’s all the important stuff for now, if you were busy.”

“I was, but I’m always happy to make time for you. I look forward to seeing you in person. I’m almost starting to forget how you taste.”

“I’m looking forward to reminding you.”

She actually kissed the mirror. When she pulled away, it was with a sly grin. “See you soon!” Just like that, the feed dropped.

“You really do have all the fun, Nav,” Sunny said.

“Whenever I get time off from going through absolute hell, at least,” I said with a shrug, placing the mirror on the bed. “So, are my clothes properly secured now?”

“Of course. I took the liberty of laying an outfit out for you so you can change out of your armor before you leave.” Sure enough, she left out a pretty little sundress and some liberal underwear. “I figured that would be more comfortable.”

“You figured correctly,” I said, finally starting to remove the armor. “I will be bringing this just in case, though.”

“Then I shall go fetch a larger bag.” She trotted out, closing the door behind her. It was kinda pointless, because Taya let herself in moments later.

“Unless it’s an emergency, knock first,” I said.

“But then I might not catch you in any compromising positions!”

I stopped what I was doing and just stared at her. The grin on her face very slowly disappeared until she looked away awkwardly. I finally continued changing.

When I was finally all dolled up, someone knocked. “Come in.”

Sunny walked in with a larger bag. She smiled when she saw me. “You look much better, my lady.”

“Yeah, this dress is super cute.” I grabbed the bag and started stuffing my armor and magazines into it. I’m kinda surprised she didn’t stop me to make me do it right. “Thanks for the help. Go ahead and get packed. I still need to talk to a few people here and there, so it’ll take me a few minutes to head to the other ship.”

“Of course, my lady. Taya, do you need any help?”

“Nope. I’m not bringing much and I teleported it all over already.” Sunny finally bowed and left.

I took a moment to put Athena’s book in my sack of clothes. After a second of thought, I decided to leave the mirror on the ship. “Send my gun and both bags, if you don’t mind,” I said.

Taya’s horn lit up and they all vanished. “So what next?”

“I’m gonna talk to Jak. You’re welcome to either come with me or head on to the other ship.”

“Of course I’ll stay with you, mommy!”

“Then let’s go.” I led the way out and she followed right behind. Thankfully, Jak was still in the forge, doing some work to the golem. “Hey, old man.”

“Hey, little lassie,” he replied, standing up and stretching. “Mmm, how goes the bunker?”

“Well. I’m about to head north, though. Have you seen the new airship yet?”

“We have a new airship?”

“Sure do,” I said. “I’m pretty sure it was built by the same species that built the ruins in Minos.” His eyes opened wide. “We actually encountered a member of that race earlier and the elementals got all of her memories, including her rune knowledge. I was wondering if you could work with them to possibly recreate some of what they could do.”

“Of course! I’ve been considering getting one of those things in my head for a while, but if they can share more knowledge of those who shaped our culture so, I would be honored!”

“Good. Another note about this airship: It’s absolutely fuckmassive. In fact, this ship is docked onto it right now. It’s also full of weapons. You’re welcome to study them as much as you want.”

“Once more, you place heaps of tasks upon me, asking more and more of the impossible! And each time, I succeed beyond our wildest expectations. I shall take this knowledge I am being granted and turn you into the most powerful ruler this world has ever seen, Navarone.”

“Good. I wanted to pitch an idea to you, as well.”

“I am… not famil—”

“Propose. Luna knows a spell that can find ore underground. The airship is crewed by a friendly race of bugs. I want to send it around the continent, obtaining resources like easy to reach metal, wood, and various alchemical supplies. I think the bugs can handle all the mining if you can handle the army of craftsmen using those resources.”

“I can whip any horde of lazy gits into shape! With the elementals to spread knowledge, I could get an entire group of artisans crafting runic armor, weapons, and golems!”

“That’s what I want to hear. We’re going to use them to invade Tartarus.”

He actually picked me up and hugged me. “You honor me more and more! Truly, you must someday allow me to go to Minos and spread word of what you are doing! Hundreds… thousands of minotaur smiths, crafters, and runeworkers will join us!”

“After we deal with Celestia, I’m going to look at a map and start spreading seeds, so to say. Minos will be one of the places I visit first.”

Thankfully, he finally put me down, only to lean in and kiss me on the forehead. “You are like family, Nav. I can promise that your welcome to the city will be that of a hero.”

“Baller.”

“And before I forget…” He walked over to one of his shelves, where two strange looking daggers were sitting. “These are the weapons that Luna asked me to make for you.”

I walked over to get a better look, because I figured they’d be pretty neato. “That’s a pretty hefty curve.” It was shaped almost like a talon. When he pulled both daggers out, I realized the blade was on the inside of the curve. “That looks… super deadly.” Both were covered in runes that seemed to glimmer with power. One had a large ruby in the hilt. The other had what looked like an opal. Neither blade seemed to be metal. “What are these things?”

“Luna called them karambits. Apparently they were used by a few tribes she fought in Asia. She said they would likely suit your fighting style. The one with a ruby will burn your enemies. The one with the opal will freeze them.”

“What are they made of?”

“Dragonbone-forged steel. Not haunted, this time. She kept some of the dragon components from the ones you killed on the first day so we could use them in weapons and possibly armor.”

“Nice.”

He slid them both away and handed me the belt. “Be careful, lassie. These things ain’t toys.”

“Trust me, I know. You think you could carve runes on my other naga dagger? I’d like to keep using it because it’s guaranteed access to any naga cave, but I’m starting to out-level it.”

“Of course.”

“Neatorama. It’s on my bed.”

“I will add it to my list. Now, I think I’d like to go find an elemental!”

“Have fun.” I let him walk out first, because his legs were longer. We followed. I poked my head in Twilight’s room, but she wasn’t there. Thankfully, I did find her on the deck. “‘Sup, sweetcakes?” I asked.

“Not too much. Just trying to shake off that knowledge imprint.” She actually shivered slightly. “It was very… jarring.”

“You alright?”

“Oh, of course. I’ve just never experienced someone else’s memories before. I keep having to remind myself to just focus on the knowledge, not the memories of gaining the knowledge.”

“I kinda figured the elementals could give you just the knowledge, not both.”

“So did I. Apparently since they’re incapable of understanding runes properly, they have to show me the process of how she actually learned the runes instead of just giving me the knowledge.”

“Weird. When are you heading out?”

“As soon as I finish packing. You?”

“As soon as I finish mackin’ on my mare.”

“You’ve said that one before… kissing, maybe?”

“Basically means flirting and advances. Kissing is somewhere in there, though.”

“Good!” She hopped up and braced her hooves on my shoulders so she could comfortably kiss me. Once again, her face was all kinds of warm and fuzzy. Taya’s gleeful giggles made it even better.

When at least half of us got tired of the tongue battle, we finally pulled away. “I’ll see you in the Crystal Empire, Twiggles,” I said, nuzzling her.

“I’ll be waiting!” Her hooves finally pulled back and she landed back on the deck. “I’m gonna go pack.”

“Make sure to bring the vibe,” I said. “I’m absolutely gonna make you wear it in front of your brother. Ooh, Cadance and I can compete with our remotes to see who cums first, you or your brother!”

“Gross.”

“Don’t judge Shiny. He can’t help that he’s a little butt slut.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.” She finally sniffed and walked past me, hitting me with her tail as she went. I thought about slapping her ass, but decided against it. Instead, my daughter and I started walking across the huge ship.

Kat very quickly joined us so she could latch herself to one of my arms again. She was finally wearing my sword, too. Apparently she knew she had annoyed me enough for the day, so she didn’t say a word until we got to the bridge leading to the changeling ship.

She finally hugged me as tightly as she could and whispered, “I’ll miss you, my lady.”

“I’m sure the time will just fly by,” I replied, reaching around and groping her ass with both hands. And it’ll be nice to get away from these crazy people for a few days.

A few seconds after the hug got uncomfortably long, she finally let me go and pulled away. “I’ll be sure to spend all my time thinking about ways to better serve you, my lady.”

“Cool.” I reached over and booped her, then finally walked onto the other ship.

Sketch flew over from the wheel to land in front of me. “What are your orders, my lady?” he asked.

“We’re going to be heading north, to the Crystal Empire,” I said. “Cast off as soon as Princess Gilda, Sunny, Brook, and Aqua are all aboard.”

“There are only three guest rooms, my lady.”

“The elementals will be fine in the hold. The princess will be sharing a room with me.”

“What about me?!” my filly demanded.

“This is the first chance I’ve had with her away from her guards. I’ll still have plenty of time to rub your belly. Hers is just going to be getting priority rubs for now.” That made her start muttering, but I happily ignored it.

“We’ll cast off as soon as they’re all aboard, my lady,” he said with a bow. “Would you like the food pony to be dressed up?”

“...What does that involve?”

“Something to cover his cage, for one thing.”

“Very specifically, what does it entail?”

“A standard maid dress that we got from Doppel. He’s far enough along now that he’s about androgynous enough to be a mare.”

God dammit. “That won’t be necessary. Why not just give him male clothes?”

“I don’t know. It was the queen’s idea.”

Of course it was. “Whatever. I’m gonna go claim a room.”

“Shall I inform you before we depart?”

“No. Leave as soon as everyone’s on board.”

“As you command.”

Since he didn’t seem to have any more questions, my daughter and I finally went belowdecks. The guest rooms were right at the front of the ship, so I quickly picked out the room with all my shit in it. It also had Taya’s stuff, so I had a feeling she had been planning to share rooms. She snatched her things and sulked off to another room to pout.

I pulled Athena’s book out, took a deep breath, and opened it. The calamari sucked me in and deposited me straight into the arms of Hera. “Welcome back, my lovely little Navi!” she warmly said, holding me tightly. “Oooh, I’ve missed you so!”

I hugged her back, because she was just the right kind of squishy. “Sorry I haven’t been back in a while. I’ve been busy adventuring.”

“Sounds exciting! Have you been slaying enemies in my name?”

“Well, I’ve been slaying enemies. I don’t typically shout any names when I do it, though.”

“Oh come on, Navi! The more sacrifices you make for me, the stronger I become! If you hold a large enough crusade for me, I might be able to leave the book! Wouldn’t that just be wonderful? I can finally claim my rightful place as the world’s one true goddess!”

“Stop pestering my guests,” Athena said, yanking Hera out of my arms. “The age of crusades is long gone!”

“But Navi would be happy to lead one for me! Wouldn’t you, Navi?” She finally focused her glowing golden eyes straight on mine and I felt myself start slipping.

Athena tsked and grabbed one of my arms. We appeared below the deck and she pushed me backwards into a chair that suddenly appeared to support me. Another one showed up below her when she sat. “So what brings you here today?”

“Have you heard of the Zone of Alienation?”

“Yes, but I have very little information on it. I’m afraid you’ll have to look elsewhere.”

“I don’t need information. It was the place where Anonymous built all the old species. I’ve already assaulted it and am making very impressive headway. At this point, the last obstacle is the bunker itself, which is full of spirits. My crew is working on dealing with them now.”

“Ah ha. So why have you come to see me today?”

“To give you an update on the status of the world, so to say. Another very important thing happened while I was here. I now have complete control of Celestia through a water elemental. At this point, I’m basically in control of about a third of the planet. I’m going to use some of the resources I got at the bunker to invade Tartarus and finally tame it.”

“Keep me up to date with your Tartarus trip. The last great magical lake is on that continent. It was cursed by Discord’s followers, long, long ago. It is likely what is fueling the dark mutations of all the species within. If it could be cleansed, you would gain an unbelievable amount of power, surely enough to brute force you a new soul.”

“I’ll definitely make that one of my side goals. At the moment, I’m about to head north to hold a summit with several other leaders to discuss what to do with Celestia. Once we have that question settled, I’ll return to Equestria, deal with her, cut off my wings and my tail, then put myself into a coma to heal my mind and give my body time to fix itself.”

“You should have your coma in here,” Athena said. “Hera and I can ensure you heal quickly.”

“I might take you up on that.” But probably not, because Hera is horrifying. “According to the AI we found guarding the bunker, Anonymous left me a vault within. I’m not sure what’s in it yet, but it might be a lot of information. I’ll update you when we find it.”

“Excellent. I would also be interested in knowing what you decide to do with Celestia. She would make you a fine wife.”

“I’d rather not go that route. It probably would end up being the most convenient, but it would feel really bad to wipe out her mind and then force her to marry me.”

“Perhaps. It would ensure your power and guarantee that none could usurp it later. I know you consider her form fair in at least some respects, so you could likely stomach lying with her.”

“She’s actually a lot of fun in bed. It would defs feel rapey to wipe her mind and then fuck her, though.”

“Understandable, I suppose. Do you have any more news from the outside world?”

“Nothing in which you’d be interested, I don’t think.”

“Then I bid you farewell for now.” I appeared (thankfully standing) in front of the exit book. I opened it before Hera could bother me some more and plopped back out into my new room. I set the book in a drawer and fell onto the bed. It’ll be nice to have a few days to unwind. Nothing but me and all the soft princess belly I could ever rub…

“And your wonderful little eternafilly, of course!” Aqua helpfully added. “Plus your new favorite elemental!”

“But Brook isn’t my favorite.” That actually made her whimper, which was kinda amusing.

I had no way of knowing how long it would take Gilda to arrive, so I finally just closed my eyes and let myself relax.