Author's Notes:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1m6srdxGICyS7xgHCWAEoyKquoYCEoJSHRkRyuuubqck/edit

It took us five days to cross through the bitterly cold mountains. Between Luna and Gilda’s griffins, we were able to skip several wrong paths. In that time, I contacted Kat through the dream world and got all the information she was able to glean from scouting around in the jungle. In short, it wasn’t much.

Twilight and I also got to take turns playing with Princess Gilda. The poor hen wasn’t even safe in her dreams, not that she minded much. The only reason we didn’t play with her together is because Twilight was still kinda upset about what happened with Taya, which I guess was kinda understandable.

Felix continued learning more about me, though he didn’t approach me again. Spike also started hugging me more, since I refused to admit he was right about enjoying hugs. To be honest, it didn’t really bother me as much as it should have, though I made sure to struggle every time.

The first sign that we might have been in over our heads was the fact that we saw the shimmering purple dome over the top of the last mountain range in the way. It was so huge we could see it from kilometers away. As soon as it came into sight, everybody rushed over to the edge of the ship.

“It’s… enormous,” one of the water elementals whispered.

“What could sustain something like that?” Twilight asked. “The amount of magical energy it would take to even cast such a spell would be immeasurable!”

“We never found the source,” Luna said. “My expedition didn’t make it far enough.”

“What happens if you touch it?” I asked.

“It stops you,” Luna replied. “It doesn’t seem to harm anything, though all snow that hits it melts on impact.”

“Did you try hitting it with magic?” I asked.

“No. I deemed it a waste of energy. It has stood for thousands of years. Probably much longer. Nothing I could hit it with would do a thing.”

“I would like a chance to get closer to it,” Twilight said. “There are magical tests I could run. We might be able to locate the source.”

“How sure are we that it won’t react poorly?” I asked. “Would it be possible to have a magical shield that would strike back against things trying to probe it?”

“That was also on my mind,” Luna said. “I imagine something so powerful likely has defense mechanisms. This location was never meant to be penetrated. The fact that there is a hole in the side of the mountain is either pure luck or meant to be a test.”

“A test for who?” I asked.

Felix actually answered that one. “All dungeons are guarded by either monsters or traps. That way, no unworthy adventurer would ever obtain the treasure inside. The greatest treasures are always guarded by the greatest obstacles!”

Can’t really fault the logic in that. Watcher spoke up next, though. “There’s a betting pool among the guards,” he said. “Slightly more than half of us think Nav is the chosen one meant to break into the vault. The rest think we’re all gonna die horribly.”

“Why would I be the chosen one?” I asked.

“Because you were the one who went back in time and met the place’s previous owner. Why else would all of these defenses be here, but to keep the place safe until you return and get what he left for you?”

“If you ever call me the chosen one again, I’m making Luna take away your night guard appearance.”

His ears flinched. “I apologize, my lady. You’ll never hear it again.”

“I dunno. I think pink might suit you.”

“I learned my lesson, I swear!”

“Uh huh.” See there? That’s how you handle an unruly subject.

“With threats?” Aqua asked.

Only threats. You didn’t have to take me over to get me to do what you wanted.

“I know, but I like you better this way. I’ll like you even more once I turn you into the perfect bride for your partner-to-be!”

“So what do you think our ETA is?” I asked.

“Passing this last range will take us an hour or two,” Luna said. “And if things haven’t changed, that will put us in view of the forest.”

“And our other ship,” Watcher said. “We should send flyers out soon to make contact.”

“Do you think your troops can manage in the cold and the altitude?”

“I’ll tell Shadow Fall and Nightshade to get suited up. They’ll be out on deck shortly.” He trotted off to the lower levels.

“It will be nice to put this matter to rest,” Luna said, her eyes staring at the purple shield.

“Are you that confident?” Twilight asked. “Given what we know, I don’t think it’ll be difficult, but surely somebody else powerful enough has had the same idea we do.”

“Someone pulled the dream machine out,” I replied. “So somebody else has obviously gotten a powerful enough group together to make it through that place and get some heavy objects back. But if there are still enough artifacts left that people like Felix can get make a profit off of it, I think the motherlode has yet to be found. And as much as I rag on Watcher for it, a part of me agrees that I’m the one that’s supposed to find it.”

“You believe yourself to be some manner of chosen one?” Luna asked.

“Nothing so much like that. But I did have a talk with the past me and told him that this place still existed. He said it was interesting and that I needed to explore it when I could. The fact that it’s still standing after all these years means there’s something there. I’m confident that we can find it.”

“As am I,” Luna said. “You have built a strong team, much better than the retinue I had when attempting to break in. We will make it.”

“Damn right,” I said. “Luna, come with me.” That got a few looks, but Luna followed me down into the ship. I led her to my room and she closed the door behind us. “In terms of experience, you would logically be suited to second in command.”

“In terms of experience, I should be in command. But I yield to you in all matters, liege lady. I will follow whatever order you give, even if it is to follow the orders of another.”

“Oh no, you answer directly to me. I’m just letting you know that you probably won’t have anybody answering to you. At least, not yet.”

“That is acceptable. Unlike my sister, I do not need others to do my dirty work.”

“You realize you just compared me to your sister.”

“You do not need me, do you? I merely offered my assistance and you accepted. You were doing just fine without me.”

“Whatever. Do you want Jak to make you a set of armor for future use?”

“I asked him the day you accepted me as a vassal. We have worked on it every day since. It will be finished before we embark.”

“Oh. I guess that works.”

“He also mentioned searching for ways to make ponies more lethal in combat, so I drew him several designs I found most effective in the old days.”

“If they worked back then, why doesn’t Celestia use them now?”

“She fears the rise of the military,” Luna replied. “I wasn’t alone in my betrayal. The vast majority of the armed forces followed me. We decimated her remaining loyalists before she even knew what was happening. From then on, it was just her, her vassals, the cursed unicorns in that eternally damned tower, and the Elements of Harmony. If she hadn’t destroyed Ponero with a comet, I would have won even with those advantages. But ever since my betrayal, she has been working to turn the army from an effective war group to an ineffective showpiece defense force. That is why huge crime rings run rampant under her own nose. Blossom was going to be my protege, a true force to be reckoned with. Something to fix all the problems Celestia allowed to flourish in my absence.”

“I don’t think she agrees with your choice.”

“I am aware.”

“And what is Ponero? I think Celestia mentioned it once, but I haven’t found any information about it.”

She snorted. “I’m surprised Celestia would even mention it. It was my capital, the seat of my power and a military fortress so powerful nothing could take it. She destroyed it with a comet. That is why the wastelands in the center of Equestria exist. We used to keep all of it safe. With its destruction, monsters were allowed to run rampant. And after my defeat, all of her well-trained and high ranking officers were dead. Instead of starting over from scratch, she decided to reign supreme as Equestria’s protector, fearing any attempts to steal her power. That is also when she decided to completely control history, erasing moments she didn’t like and creating a much nicer history where she ruled eternally as a loving mother.”

“...You’re looking forward to this confrontation, aren’t you?”

“Yes I am,” she smugly said, a frankly creepy smile on her face. “Once I have her on the floor, I am going to slice off her horn, bash her on the skull, and send her straight to the moon. I will laugh as she takes her dying breaths and attempts to beg for mercy. The last thing she will see before dying in agony is my gloating face.”

“Neat. So why can you survive on the moon but not anybody else?”

“To be honest, I do not know. I often ponder if Celestia can survive on the sun, but she refuses to make the attempt.”

“Understandable, to be honest. I hope you don’t mind, but we’re probably gonna be having more history talks in the future.”

“I do not mind in the slightest. If that is all for now, I shall go check on my armor, then return to the top.”

“That’s all.” She bowed and left, leaving the door open behind her. That didn’t much matter to me, so I pulled off my heavy clothes and began pulling on carbon nanotube armor. Once it was in place, I started lining it with weapons. Two daggers went on my back. The sword went on my side. I carried two strings of throwing knives strapped around my stomach. I put the alicorn amulet and the ring in a pouch on my side. After a second or two of thought, I slid the weird collapsing baton into a pocket as well. I slid a few rifle magazines into a larger pouch on the other side.

When I was adequately covered in weapons, I swung my leather cloak around my shoulders. I finally got around to lining it with fur from some of OG’s kills. I also sewed on a hood, also lined with heavy fur. All in all, it was warm and comfy as fuck. It was also lined with pockets, though I hadn’t created any new weapons to hide in them yet. With it around my shoulders, I grabbed my rifle, loaded it, and went up to the deck.

Everybody was back to whatever they had been doing when the dome came into view. I started walking toward Watcher and his two guards, but Princess Gilda stepped in my way with a smile. “I must say, I quite like your new look,” she warmly said.

“Yeah, I feel like a badass. Getting suited up usually makes me a little bit wet.”

“That’s not surprising in the slightest, if I’m being honest. I think I like the tough warrior look. It’s… quite sexy.”

“And I like the corrupted bookworm look. It’s also super sexy. Do you still want guards assigned to you, or will you be fine with the griffins you already have?”

“Give me the dragon.”

“You sure?” I asked.

“Yes. Why? Do you doubt him?”

“Not at all. Spike is loyal, lethal, and he won’t let you down. He just—”

I was cut off by a hug from behind. This time, he wrapped the cloak around my arms so all I could do was sullenly kick. “I just what, Navi?” he sweetly asked.

“He’s just a big faggot!” I growled, struggling to break free. He wasn’t having it, though, having learned most of my tricks.

Gilda smirked. “Seeing you like this somewhat undermines your image of a great warrior.”

“She’s just a cuddly wittle human,” Spike mockingly said. He made the mistake of trying to nuzzle the back of my head, which made headbutting him easy. He reared backwards and finally let me go to clutch at his face, so I kicked him right between the legs. Luckily for him, he was still sheathed, but it still made him fall to the ground. One talon was clutching his face and the other, his junk.

I looked back to Gilda with a feral grin. “He’s all yours, princess. Good luck.” She snorted and I finally pushed past her to meet up with Watcher. His scouts took off while I was dealing with Gilda, so it was just him.

“Spike is going to help guard the princess.”

“Very well. What are you going to do about Luna?”

“She’ll be with me. I’ll also have Kat, Taya, and Flo. All the guards will be under your command. The water elementals will answer to Brook.”

“And the fires?”

“They’re on point.”

“Twilight?”

“I’ll let her roam as she wants, though she’ll have to stay with the group.”

“What will we do with the ships?”

“Keep them both out of range of anything that might sneak out of the forest. With luck, the storms won’t get too bad out here. Changelings can cloud bust, can’t they?”

“I believe so. I also think the crew unicorns learned how to cast a few weather related spells.”

“Excellent. So what do you think, old man? Did we prepare enough?”

He actually nodded. “I’m not going to say it’ll be easy, but I believe we have a good chance of getting in and getting out.”

“A vote of confidence from the big grump himself! I must be doing something right.”

“You’ve also done plenty of things wrong, so don’t let it go to your head.”

“Aww, I think the big grump needs a tummy rub!”

“Maybe when we get back.” I don’t know how to feel about that, actually. “Unless you need anything else, I’m going below to get ready.”

“Go for it. I’ll be here.” He bowed his head and went below. I walked over to the side of the deck facing the dome, which could still be seen over the top of the mountain. “I’m coming for you, motherfucker.”

“And you’re gonna get him, mommy,” Taya happily said, pressing up against me. “Your cloak looks nice and warm! You should make me one, too.”

“I’ll see what I can do. How would you feel about a suit of armor? I was waiting until you were fully grown, but I guess there’s no reason to, now.”

“Why would I need armor, mommy? I’m gonna be behind you the whole time!”

“Just in case, of course. As a bonus, it’ll make you look fierce.”

“Oooh, that sounds nice! Can I help design it?”

“Yep. You’ll have to work with Jak or Smiles.” And I’ll have to double check to make sure it’s appropriate. “Luna knows how to make it lighter. That should definitely help.”

“I’ll figure it out.”

“She’s my vassal now too, Taya. I thought you said it would be okay if she became my vassal.”

“...Is that why you changed your mind?”

“No.” Though it is an added bonus. “I want you to treat her the same you would, say, Kat.”

She sighed and nodded. “Okay, mommy…”

I rubbed her head. “That’s my filly. Go below and get everything you’ll need. Pack light, but be ready for at least one night, possibly two.”

“What would I even need?” she asked. “I don’t have to eat anymore!”

“Clothes. It snap-freezes in the crater. We’ll be using magic to keep the temperature steady, but you’ll still want something just in case. That will also give you pouches for potions from Zecora or loot we find.”

“I guess that makes sense. We’ll have to go hunting in the Everfree when we get back. That way I can help pick out the animal for my cloak!”

“Sounds fun to me. It should be easy since we’ll both be invisible to the critters in there. Now you head on below and get ready. I’ll be up here when you get back.”

“Okay, mommy.” She trotted off, happily wagging her tail.

As soon as she was gone, I was approached by a water elemental. Unfortunately, it was the shittest one there was. “And what can I do for you, Aqua?” I unpleasantly asked.

“I think it is unwise to leave your protection up to Flo. She is not trained in combat. Wouldn’t you be better off in the hands of another?”

“You mean like Luna, Taya, and Kat?”

She held up one of her hands and it became a spike. “I can protect you better than any of them. I can certainly protect you better than Flo ever could.”

“I think I’ll be fine.”

She smirked. “When you change your mind, I’ll be ready.” With that, she slithered off.

So what was the point of that?

“Why would you turn her down?” Twilight asked from next to me.

“How the fuck do you ponies keep sneaking up on me?” I asked. “Seriously, you have loud, cloppy hooves!”

“Nav, this isn’t going to be a safe trip. You need all the help you can get.”

“I need the troops I have to obey the orders I give. Aqua is going to be on Brook’s line, acting as part of the spearhead through the forest. If she does her job properly, I won’t need guards at all. And even if she doesn’t do her job properly, I’m still in good hands and hooves.”

“Do you really trust Luna more than Aqua?”

“Absolutely, in a fucking heartbeat.”

She sighed and shook her head. “Unbelievable. What has Aqua done that was really that bad, Nav?”

Oh, if only I could sing to you the ways… “Luna swore an oath to me. And she passed a lie test. She’s dedicated wholly to serving me. It isn’t about what Aqua’s done to me, it’s about what Luna has done for me. And in terms of sheer lethality, we’ve already seen that Luna beats everybody here hands down. I’m safer in her forsaken hooves than I am with anybody else.”

“...If she’s willing to turn on her own sister, she’ll be willing to turn on you, too. All it will take is a good enough reason.”

“Her sister treated her like trash. I won’t make the same mistake. Generally speaking, I reward my followers well.”

“I certainly can’t deny that,” she said. “Something for which my friends have been quite grateful. Of course, you also tend to ask a lot.”

“It makes sense to me,” I replied with a shrug. “If you ask hard things of people, you pay them well for it. That ensures more quality work in the future as well as loyalty. If Luna somehow fails to protect me, I still have Kat, Taya, Flo, and myself. I think I’ll be fine. Adding any more to my entourage will just make it harder to command.”

“And you don’t think taking the time to get on better terms with Aqua would make it worthwhile?”

“Not when I could spend the time to get on better terms with Flo instead. Our relationship has deteriorated. I would like to fix that.”

“What about your relationship with Aqua?”

“What about your relationship with Celestia?” She blinked. “She’s never done anything directly to you, has she? So what’s stopping you from trying to make things right with her?”

“My own morals.”

“And my own morals are preventing me from dealing with Aqua.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

I tousled her mane. “You’ll come to understand in time, Twiggles.” She sighed, shook her head, and walked away.

“That was the point,” Aqua smugly replied in my head.

You’re a really unpleasant being.

“Like you can talk.” I wasn’t really interested in another session of Aqua’s insanity, so I just sighed and dropped it. “That’s part of how I’ll win, you know. I can keep barraging you until you just give in and accept it!”

I’m not accepting anything. I’m just ignoring you.

“She says, in reply to me.”

“Feeling nervous?” the next pony to bother me asked. I looked down and discovered it was Sunny Disposition.

“Not particularly,” I answered.

“Oh. You were just grimacing, so I assumed… Well, I made cookies for you, either way!” Her horn lit up and a small box of them appeared. “Taya actually didn’t know which you’d prefer, so I only made chocolate chip this time. Amber even helped!”

“Chocolate chip is perfectly fine,” I said, taking the box. “Amber didn’t put anything weird in there, right?”

“I smacked her with a spatula every time she tried adding any special ingredients.”

“Just checking.” I finally popped the box open and nommed one of the fuckers down. It was pretty dank. “I approve.”

“Good! I thought they might help take the edge off. You’re not allowed to share, though. You have to eat every single one!”

“Deal. And if anybody asks, I’ll tell them you were the one who said I couldn’t share.”

“Good,” she replied with a nod. “You need more meat on your bones, my lady.”

“Yeah, the stallions would love more cushion for the pushin’.” So would everything else I fuck, honestly.

“Right. Honestly, you’re so skinny that it’s scary sometimes. I really don’t think your bones should be showing under your skin!”

Way to body shame me. “Probably not. It’s not that bad anymore, though. I’ll let you see later if you promise to give Amber all the details.”

She sighed and shook her head. “That poor mare has it bad, my lady. How long are you going to keep torturing her?”

“All she has to do is ask and it ends, just like that. Honestly, I’m starting to wonder if she gets off to the teasing.”

“That… is an interesting proposition. I honestly don’t know. Is that even a thing?”

“Yes. I guess I’ll keep teasing her until she finally gives in and tells me what she wants.”

“You’re such a wonderful lady,” she sighed. “Always thinking about your subjects…”

I grabbed another cookie and said, “I know, I’m a fucking miracle,” with my mouth full.

She giggled and said, “Enjoy your cookies, my lady. I’m heading back below for now.”

“‘Kay. And thanks again.”

“Anything for you, Lady Navarone.” She bowed her head before trotting off.

Watcher was finally coming back up from the depths, now covered in armor. He walked my way, eyeing the cookies. “I thought I smelled something deliciously sweet.”

“Yeah, these things are the bomb diggity. It’s a shame I’m not allowed to share.” He lifted an eyebrow. “Blame Sunny. She said I had to eat them all or else Amber would punish me.”

“Somehow I don’t think she worded it quite like that.”

“You think correctly. The sentiment was still there, though. I have to eat all of these myself.”

“You truly make great sacrifices for your subjects, my lady,” he sarcastically replied.

I sighed, eating another cookie. “It’s truly awful, Watcher,” I morosely replied. It was muffled by a cookie, but I think he still got the gist. “How long do you think we’ll go before hearing from the other ship?”

“Until we see it. I ordered them to wait for us. They were only going to warn them that we should be there soon. That way, they can compile all the information they’ve gathered.”

“Which isn’t much, unfortunately,” I said. “I’ve been keeping in contact with Kat. There’s definitely a warband in the jungle, but she hasn’t been able to capture any alive. They all either retreat at the sight of her or fight to the death. Any that she’s managed to knock out ended up chewing off their own tongue and choking to death on it as soon as they wake up. They’re like rabid animals.”

“None of them even tried to talk?”

“Nope. She said it was eerie.”

“Hm. And they haven’t tried attacking the airship?”

“Nope. She tried leading one out of the forest to let the changelings capture it with magic, but it stopped following her when she got too close to the edge. Something is keeping them there.”

“...Interesting. And what about the forest itself?”

“Surprisingly, shittier than Felix described. It’s apparently a deathscape full of carnivorous plants, poisonous creatures of all kinds, and trees that shoot spikes out.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah. I’m thinking scorched earth, personally. The water elementals can kill everything in a straight line all the way through. If they’re unwilling, the fires can do it. If they’re unwilling, Luna will do it.”

“Seems like a good plan to me. Was she able to get through the forest?”

“Yep. She snuck through with no issues and got to the crater itself, though she didn’t go any further. Apparently there were several tornados going at the time, so she turned back before scouting.”

“That’s… discouraging.”

“Right? Luckily, Twilight knows how to bust them. A part of me wishes we brought Rainbow Dash, but it was too late to ask by the time we realized we’d need her.”

“I’m sure she would have been happy to be here. That mare enjoys her adventures. I question her value in a fight, however. This will not be a trip for the light of heart.”

“I’m just hoping it won’t be a haunted trip.”

“That’s what Zecora is for, my lady.”

“And for keeping you warm at night.”

“Yes, and for keeping me warm at night. I feel like a griffin might work better, though. Know anybody with experience taming one?” His raised eyebrow made it seem like he was insinuating something.

“Yeah, Spike.”

“Surely you can think of one with experience taming more noble ones…”

“Yeah, Spike. OG is a very high ranking noble.”

“I was hoping for one with a more… royal nature. A graceful princess, maybe.”

“Why would you want a princess? They’re too stuffy. You’re better off with a peasant girl. They’re nice and comfy and love to party.”

“A proper gentlestallion is allowed to have some taste, my lady,” he puckishly replied. “I assumed you knew of such things. After all, you’ve courted all manner of high ranking types. How many princesses, was it?”

“Oh, who keeps count?” I asked, waving a hand. Me, for one. “Besides, queens are more fun. They’re much more mature.”

“Maybe, but princesses are more of a forbidden fruit. Why, I would love to rub a forbidden princess belly…”

“It’s overrated. Ex-princess bellies are much more enjoyable.”

Watcher finally grinned. “So you’re aware that your room isn’t naturally sound-proofed, right? That’s something that Twilight does with her magic. Normally, we can hear just about everything.”

“Oh? And do you have something to say about that, Watcher?”

“Not at all, my lady. But if you would like to thank us for keeping… prying ears away from your door, it would be most appreciated. Those griffin guards were quite curious about what you and Princess Gilda have been discussing. I’m sure any number of questions might be asked had they been listening in.”

“If there’s anything I hate, it’s eavesdroppers. Our discussions are private. I’d hate for anybody to get the wrong impression.”

“Say, an impression about you sleeping with the princess?”

“I said the wrong impression. Though for that matter, I’d be wary of them getting the right impression as well.”

“Oh ho. So how is she, then?”

“No comment.”

“Obviously good enough for repeat performances.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“And good enough to warrant an invitation to Miss Shady Grey herself. My oh my, I wonder if there will be a passage in a book dedicated to breaking royalty...”

“While I still don’t know what you’re talking about, I will admit that such a thing would be super hot. There is nothing better than turning a proper lady into a begging slut.”

That made him snort. “Spoken by a proper lady herself.”

Taya reentered the conversation by shoving herself in between us, pressing her warmly dressed body against my leg. “Miss me much, mommy?”

“Always,” I replied, placing a hand on her head.

“Oh, Sunny finished the cookies!”

“She sure did. I would offer to share, but—”

“You’re not allowed to,” she finished for me. “I know, mommy. That was my idea!”

“Best daughter ever,” I said, popping another cookie into my mouth.

“Wouldn’t the best daughter ever make enough cookies to share?” Watcher asked.

“Nope!” Taya smugly replied. “Just enough for mommy! That way, she gets cookies and gets to watch everybody else suffer! It’s a win-win!”

“They grow up so fast,” I said. Watcher sighed in disgust. “So who wants to play I Spy?”

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Watcher said. “It’s either a rock, snow, or a giant purple dome.”

“You’re really good at I Spy,” I replied.

“Even if he makes it boring,” Taya said. “I’ll play with you, mommy!” Watcher rolled his eyes and walked off without another word. “Wow, that was easier than I thought!”

“You know me so well, honey,” I said. “So, you want a cookie? I won’t tell Sunny if you don’t.”

“Oh no, Amber’s always watching. If you let anyone else have a cookie, you’re gonna regret it!”

“I’m almost curious enough to risk it, but I guess I’ll behave. I’m definitely not going to be able to eat all of these in one sitting, though.”

“I made sure to leave a pouch available for the box,” she replied. She took it from my hands and flew it to a small bag on her side. When it was in place, she pulled the string and closed the bag. “Let me know when you want more!”

“‘Kay.” And now, aside from the crumbs in my mouth, I’ve already forgotten they even existed. “I gotta say, waiting is the worst part of campaigning.”

“I thought the worst part was getting all the blood out of your hair.”

“Nah, that builds character. Standing here in all my gear, weighed down by this haunted sword, I’m left feeling restless, like I should be moving. And yet here I stand, awaiting a battle that is at least another hour away…”

“I can fix that,” Taya said. “I’ve only tried the spell a few times, but it’s not that hard!”

“What spell?”

“A time manipulator. It’ll feel like just a blink of an eye, to you, but any amount of time could have passed.”

“...No thanks.”

“Aww…”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you to pull it off, it’s that I’d rather stay lucid just in case I’m needed. You never know what might happen.”

“I know… But I like showing off my magic for you!”

“Cause an avalanche.”

She looked up at me, eyes twinkling with joy. “Can I really?!”

“Yep. Just do it under us, so we don’t have to worry about any rocks peppering the ship.”

“Hm…” She closed her eyes and pointed her horn straight at the mountain. After a few seconds, it lit up and… nothing happened. Her eyes scrunched up and finally, something under the snow cracked and a huge boulder ripped free. She released it and it started tumbling down the mountain. All the snow that had been under it was now falling as well, creating a massive avalanche that cascaded down the huge mountain. “How’s that?”

“Fucking badass.” Of course, it also garnered a lot of other attention and a few disapproving gazes, but I didn’t give a fuck. On the off chance there actually was somebody down there, they were probably related in some way to the zone. Thus, evil and deserving of death. “Think you can throw a rock far enough to hit the dome?”

“I know I can!”

“Don’t,” Twilight said before Taya could have more fun. “Nav, why are you letting her be so irresponsible?”

“How is causing an avalanche in the middle of nowhere irresponsible?”

“It’s not. Using so much magic before potentially being in a hostile zone is.”

“Oh come on,” I said, waving a hand. “Magic literally grows on trees!”

“First of all, no it doesn’t.” Athena says otherwise... “Second, even if it did, there aren’t any trees around. If there had been, the avalanche would have destroyed them. Third, Taya should already know better, so I know she only did it because you brought it up. And I know you brought it up because it’s exactly the kind of thing you would have her do for fun.”

“What are you, the fun police?” I asked. “I’m sorry, Herr Twilight. Please don’t take me away to your gulag!”

“I have no idea what that means, but something deep inside of me just knows it was probably horribly offensive.”

“That’s because you and mommy are a perfect couple!” Taya sweetly said.

“Like socks and sandals,” I said. “Or crocs and jorts!”

Twilight sighed deeply before giving my daughter a serious look. “Be wary of wasting your magic frivolously. If you run out of energy on this expedition, somebody will have to carry you. Worse still, it might cut into your mother’s plans. You know you’ll feature heavily in anything she’s likely to try.”

“Nuh uh!” Taya quickly replied. “Luna’s much more expendable than I am! Mommy will use her up before she asks me to lift a single hoof!”

“But I trust you more,” I said. “Generally speaking, I’d sooner ask things of you than order them of Luna. You know, depending on the situation.”

“And even if not, wouldn’t you rather protect your mommy yourself?” Twilight asked. “That way, she’ll rub your belly when we get back instead of Luna’s!”

“All I have to do for a belly rub is ask,” Taya said. “And if she’s giving one to a vassal, she’ll either make room or cut it short for me! But I would rather save mommy myself...”

“It’ll be hard to do that with no magic reserves,” Twilight said. “So don’t go causing random avalanches just because she told you to.”

Taya rolled her eyes. “Ugh, fine. I guess if mommy’s the cool, fun parent, you’re the boring, responsible one.”

“I’m not boring!” Twilight said, sounding surprisingly shocked and offended. “Tell her I’m not boring!”

“I mean, you have your moments, but…”

“You always get mad at mommy for all the fun things she lets me do!” Taya said.

“That’s because most of them are dangerous and irresponsible!”

“Which makes you boring,” Taya replied with a nod. “Fun people know that sometimes dangerous and irresponsible things are okay!”

“I raised you right,” I said, tousling my little filly’s hair. She squee’d in delight. “See there, Twiggles? Taya knows what’s up!”

“Sometimes I wonder if you raised her wrong as a joke. Then I realize that no, you’re really just that shitty of a mother.”

“Now she gets it! Taya, high five!” I lifted a hand up high and Taya leapt up to smack it with a hoof. “Now I have somebody just as shitty as me running around! I’m not alone anymore, Twiley.”

“Wow. Just… Wow.” She shook her head in pure disbelief before walking away, head hung low.

“We make a great team,” Taya giddily said.

“Hell yeah we do. Wanna make a sign that says ‘No Fun Allowed’ and sign it with Twilight’s name? We can make her wear it around her neck every time she gives us boring lectures.”

“It’s like you’re reading my mind, mommy!”

We both walked back down below, giggling like children. It was a pretty decent way to waste fifteen minutes.

Twilight didn’t appreciate our gift. I knew I was in for some punishment later. So basically, all according to plan.

By the time we finished dicking around, the end of the mountain range was finally in view. Everybody on deck perked up as we finally passed the last of the stupidly huge rocks and the fuckmassive crater came fully into view. Even more mouths dropped as we started flying toward the changeling ship.

“...What could have caused this?” Taya whispered.

It was a reasonable question. Any comet that created that huge of a crater probably would have destroyed all life on the planet. Hell, it might have cracked the entire planet in half.

“I have no idea,” I said.

From what we could see, the diameter of the crater had to be at least five kilometers, possibly more. We could only see part of it, with the rest being blocked by more mountains. The spooky forest was only a small blip on the side of the otherwise flawless crater ring. It appeared to be maybe a kilometer large at its biggest, but shrunk to a quarter of a kilometer where it squeezed into the crater.

“It’s always a humbling sight,” Felix said from next to us. “Just wait until we get through the forest!”

I crossed my arms, still taking the whole thing in. “How thick do you think the rocks are at the edge of the dome?” I asked.

“Probably a few dozen meters at most,” he replied.

“Taya, how difficult would it be to cut a hole through a few dozen meters of rock the size of an airship?”

“Cutting a hole? That would be kinda hard. But blowing a hole through it would be easy.”

“The airship would never survive in there,” Felix said.

“It doesn’t have to. All it has to do is last long enough to drop us off. That way, we can skip the entire fucked up forest. Extracting us would also be much easier.”

“...If it was that easy, why wouldn’t it have been done before?” he asked.

“Where do you think that forest came from? Something had to cause that fissure. Way I figure, it’s worth trying to skip the first obstacle entirely.”

That made the kitty grin. “Truly, a suggestion worthy of the great Lady of Nature.”

“Yeah, I’m the fucking best,” I sarcastically replied. “I’m gonna go find Luna. Taya, help bridge and anchor the ships together.”

“I… have no idea how.”

“Ask Gourd. I’m heading below.”

She shrugged and started heading up to the wheel while I walked to the stairs leading into the ship. The first place I checked was her room. She wasn’t there, so I walked down to the smithy.

I found her in there with Jak. She was currently wearing the bottom half of a suit of full mail armor, helping Jak tap a glowing line into the upper portion. Once the line was complete, I realized that it was part of a rune that covered the entire suit of armor. “I shall be ready for battle soon, Nav,” she said.

“Good. So what’s that rune gonna do?”

“Many things,” Jak replied. “It is one of the most powerful I have created, enclosed within a full suit of armor forged with the carbon of diamonds.”

“Cool. So what are those things?”

“The metal’s strength is enhanced ten-fold. It makes the wearer immune to heat or cold. Once we finish the helmet, it will allow the wearer to see through illusions and easily peer through water. Her blows will be infused with magical energy.”

“Until we get the claws finished,” Luna said. “They will be imbued with fire.”

“The old mare knows a thing or two about runes, to be sure,” Jak said. “I always thought the lines in Celestia’s crown and peytral were for decorations. I never once thought to look at them as runes!”

“I have heard you have a source of gems,” Luna said, looking back to me. “If you grant me access to them, I will increase their value and teach your unicorns a means for extra power.”

“By making blood gems?” I asked.

“Indeed. I’m surprised you know the process.”

“...I’ve done it before.” Her eyebrows lifted. “Does it have to be something sapient?”

“No. Any animal life will do. So who did you murder, hm? Will we need to watch out for vengeful hunters?”

“It was a dragon while I was magically transformed into a dragon. He was trying to turn me in to Bahamut, essentially.”

“Ah. Those gems will be extremely powerful. I imagine they have already been plucked from the earth.”

“They wouldn’t be guarded as a monument?” I asked. “I mean, I legit straight up just murdered that purifier.”

“They would start that way until their dragon greed got the best of them. But it is little matter. With certain runes, I can use a blood gem as a source of energy. Once it is drained, it can be replaced. That’s what the gems are on Celestia’s artifacts. They also power several passive defensive spells on her. If they are ever activated, the energy is taken out of the gem.”

“This all sounds like necromancy and dark magic,” I said.

“Oh, it is,” Luna confirmed with a nod. “Even the possession of a blood gem is a crime tantamount to high treason in Equestria. Any unicorn possessing one and actually attempting to use it would be severed immediately and forced to grind their own horn before being locked into the highest security black site we have.”

“...What if they didn’t grind their horn?”

“They would be tortured until they either did so or died. Celestia still keeps a few of the old ways, when they suit her or are far enough from the public eye. The only exceptions she allows are her own and those of her inquisitors.”

“There’s more than one of those freaks?” I asked.

“Yes. They’re broken up into three groups: Those who hunt necromancers, those who hunt demons, and those who hunt dark mages. Thankfully, she doesn’t keep many of them.”

“Why didn’t she send any of them to clean up Sombra?”

“There was a prophecy that Celestia wanted to fulfill to further her goal of making Twilight a princess.”

“Oh, that makes sense. Does that mean I’m gonna become Princess Navarone?”

“No, of course not. At least, not because of that. You will become Princess Navarone after we kill Celestia.”

“No, I’ll be queen-consort.” Not that it’ll matter.

“Ah, yes, your deal with Moonbeam. With the aid of the elementals, Twilight Sparkle, Cadance, and Shining Armor, we might not need Moonbeam at all. I would like to keep her in reserve, but only as a last resort.”

“We’ll talk about that when we get to the Crystal Empire,” I said. “I do like Moonie, but I’m not sure she’s marriage material.” And I know I’m not marriage material. “So could you make me a similar set of armor?”

“No,” Luna immediately said. “I would need to research different types of runes. This one was designed by Starswirl and I specifically for equines. You can’t tell now, but when all the pieces are together, they will make one continuous rune that will intermittently glow with power.”

Jak decided to weigh in with, “I believe I could make a set of automated bipedal armor, if I could find a way to seal it together. The golem runes would work just as well on a hollow chunk of metal.”

“What about a skeleton?” I asked. “Or either tattoos or scar art?”

“Yes to all of the above,” Luna said. “Celestia and I believe that cutie marks are a form of rune, though we never determined what was causing them. That might well be why I can survive on the moon. I believe the inquisitor you met was the head of the demon fighting order. If so, you would have seen his runic tattoos. They can grant one all manner of abilities, but the inks are difficult to make.”

I bet I can get a magic tramp stamp. “That’s something to keep in mind. I got plenty of blank canvas to work with.”

“It will be easy to accomplish in Tartarus,” Luna said. “A few demon clans rely on them extensively and would have the ink and knowledge you require.”

“I’m not sure I want to let a demon tattoo me. It’s something to consider for the future, at least. Anyway, I came down to ask how hard it would be to bust through a few meters of rock.”

“You seek to create your own hole instead of using the forest?”

“Yep.”

“It would not be difficult,” she replied. “I considered doing it myself, but we cleared the forest out entirely while scouting and looted it of every herb and poison of value. At that point, it seemed prudent to just go in the front door. But if you would like to skip it, doing so would be simple.”

“I would. We only have two herbalists with us and they’re both going to be joining to the group heading to the center. I don’t want to leave anybody behind looting and I’d rather just skip it entirely.”

“So be it. Once my armor is finished, I will scout with your daughter to find the weakest point, then we will create a hole large enough that we can easily get to it from the ship.”

“Alrighty. We’re about to dock with the other ship, so we’ll probably be in the planning room going over final preparations.”

“Then we will get the helmet done post-haste and skip the remaining weapons,” she replied. “I shall be on deck soon.”

“Dope. Find me when you do.”

“As you command,” she said, bowing her head. I went back up to the top and made it right as we got to the other ship.

As soon as Kat saw me, she sprinted across their boat and leapt onto ours so she could tackle me with a hug. “Hello to you, too,” I said, hugging her back. Felix was watching with a wagging tail.

“I missed you so much, Navi!” she said.

“I’ve been meeting you in your dreams every night for almost a week.”

“But I can’t smell you in the dreams… I love your scent so much, my lady!”

Jesus Christ, what is with you people? “Creepy, but good to know. I guess I’ll give you a used shirt for Christmas or something.”

“No, I just roll around in your sheets whenever I need a fix.” She finally pulled away from me, grinning ear to ear. “So are you ready for the bloodbath?!”

“We’re probably skipping the forest, actually,” I said. She blinked in surprise, her smile dipping slightly. “Luna thinks she can easily knock a hole just under the dome. If we go in there, we skip the entire forest.”

“...Luna?” she slowly said, losing the rest of her smile.

“Yep. She’s my latest vassal.”

“W-why?”

“Because she wanted to be. I decided to say fuck it and let her.”

“B-but…”

“She swore the same magically binding oath as everybody else.”

She pulled me close again and whispered, “Please don’t replace me, my lady…”

“Luna’s not a replacement for anybody. If I need somebody murdered, I still know where to turn.”

Kat sighed in delight. “That’s good to hear… I love being of service to you…”

“Yeah, I’m pretty great.” The crew members on both ships were working on setting up a bridge between the two so people without wings or who weren’t willing to risk falling to death could easily get between the two. “So did you manage to get any prisoners?

Kat pulled back again, but kept her arms around me. “I’m afraid not, Nav. After we captured the first two, the others we managed to get were teleported away before we could escape the forest.”

“Oh well. I doubt they’d be useful, anyway.”

“I’m sorry I failed you, Nav…” she morosely said.

“I forgive you. We need to get Sketch, Gourd, Watcher, and Brook up to the planning room. I’ll leave Sketch and Brook to you.”

“I’d be happy to get them all!” she said, her tail wagging.

“I hope you’ll also be happy to just get Sketch and Brook. I’ll also want you there, of course.”

She pulled herself up to nuzzle me warmly, tickling my face with her whiskers. When she was done, she finally pulled away with a smile. “I’ll be right there, Navi!” She walked back across the bridge, brushing past Felix without even a glance.

Finding Watcher was easy, since he walked over shortly after Kat began hugging me. “You picked the two of us because we were on the way to the planning room, didn’t you?” he asked.

“Duh. Let’s go.” He snorted and followed me up the staircase, where we found Gourd and Taya. “We’re about to begin the final briefing,” I said. “Head to the planning room whenever you’re finished getting the ships synced.”

“You got it, my lady,” Gourd said.

Taya just followed along next to me. Sending Kat in search of Brook was pointless, since she was already waiting for us. “I assume the others will be joining us shortly?” she asked with a grin.

“Yep. I’m thinking we can crack the mountain under the dome to save us from having to go through the forest. What are your thoughts?”

“I think that would be rude,” she replied. “Whoever or whatever owns this dome fully intends us to go in from the front door. Breaking its rules might be unwise.”

“Are you saying the forest is a test?” Watcher asked.

“Look at the size of this dome, Watcher,” Brook said. “Surely you can feel its power even from here! There is definitely something of tremendous strength within. It would not keep this hole in its wall for no reason. Nav, allow a few of us to go into the forest and capture some of the residents. We can painlessly absorb their knowledge before they could have a chance of fleeing. Once we know more, we can determine our next course of action. It is possible we can talk our way in if we have a way to speak with whoever is in charge. I feel that to simply skip the forest would be a grave mistake.”

“Kat wasn’t able to get any of them out alive,” I said. “And her latest attempts ended with them getting teleported away. Do you want to risk running up against magical opponents?”

“Kat is very skilled, Nav. You put much weight on her words.” I crossed my arms. Her smile deepened. “She may be skilled in silence, but we are moreso. Believe me when I say that in such an environment, they would never see or hear us coming. We could have them subdued and at our mercy in an instant.”

“Send three elementals in,” I said.

She bowed, the annoying smile still on her face. “I will return once they have departed, Nav.” With that, she slid off to the front of the ship.

“I really hope they get massacred,” Taya delightfully sighed when Brook was hopefully out of earshot. “Really mommy, how can she possibly be so smug?”

“Don’t be rude,” I said. “They are our allies. Even if most of them are horrible bitches. Now, Luna will be up shortly. Watcher, prepare an escort of pegasi to go with her and Taya to the edge.”

“Are we not going to wait for Brook’s intel?” he asked.

“No. I just had a feeling she was going to be difficult about it, so I wanted her to leave. I don’t give a fuck what some being under this dome wants. We obviously aren’t supposed to be here. And we are obviously going in anyway. I don’t know about you, but I’d prefer skipping the guard dogs. If we can break in, we’re going to.”

“That makes sense to me,” he said. “But she does raise a good point, Nav. We’ve run into powerful things before, things that we had no business bothering. We could be poking the spider’s nest here.”

“I’m confident that we won’t overextend,” I said. “We’ll have opportunities the entire way to back out and escape if need be. With the elementals to gather intel for us, we should be able to avoid any real problems once we get inside. If we end up finding another Arachne, we can always retreat.”

Kat finally walked in with Sketch and Brook in tow. “I have found them, Nav,” she said.

“Good. Sketch, can your ship stay here until we get back from the bunker or will you need to return to a port soon?”

“We’ll be fine here,” he replied. “Especially with more unicorns here to help keep us warm. Some of us were starting to feel sluggish in the cold.”

“Excellent. I want both ships here to help us ferry as much loot back, if at all reasonably possible.”

“How are we going to get anything back through the dome?” Brook asked.

“There might be some way to disable it inside the bunker,” Watcher said.

“And we have plenty of mages here who can teleport things,” I added. “I want to loot everything in there that isn’t nailed down.”

“That might not be wise,” Brook said. “Many of the artifacts we find are likely not things that we should risk falling into the wrong hands. Once we deal with the hostiles in the bunker, it should be safe for some of us to stay here and study the artifacts in a safe environment. Between Sunshine Smiles and Kat, we can easily communicate whenever we have a new development.”

“We’ll make that determination once we know how much stuff we’re dealing with,” I said. “This was more of a research and survival facility than a weapon place, so I don’t think we’ll find much that’s actually dangerous. Even then, we should be able to keep it pretty well-protected anyway.”

“Hm. Well, I believe my sisters should return in about thirty minutes to an hour. We’ll need to be ready to move when they return, in case they do raise any suspicions.”

“We’ll almost definitely be going through a hole in the wall under the dome, so suspicions shouldn’t be an issue.”

Her eyes turned slightly orange. “I thought we agreed it would be best to go through the forest.”

“No we didn’t. I told you to send some waters in to determine if there was any reason not to go around. If they can’t find any specific reason that we shouldn’t, that’s going to be our course of action.”

“I see. May I ask why?”

“You may,” I said.

She waited a few more seconds before her eyes got even brighter orange. “Why?”

“Because why the fuck would we fight and kill a bunch of people we don’t have to?” I asked. “Not to mention deal with a ton of poisons and carnivorous plants. Unless you have some kind of concrete proof or legitimate reason that we should go through the forest, we’re going to bypass it entirely.”

“Sounds smart to me,” Watcher said.

“The best way to deal with a hostile is to avoid them,” Kat said.

“Why go through the big scary forest if we can go around?” Taya asked. “And getting out will be even easier, too!”

We all looked at Sketch, to see if he had anything to add. When he realized we were staring at him, he blinked and actually blushed. “O-oh, I… I didn’t have a comment.”

“We’ll see what your scouts have to say,” I said. “If they conclude that we can go around, we go around.”

Brook’s eyes went back to blue and she bowed her head. “As you wish, Nav.”

Gourd finally joined us. “So what did I miss?” he asked.

“Nothing much,” I said. “We’re just finalizing plans. So once we get under the dome, what should our marching order be?”

“I don’t think it’ll matter,” Kat said. “No kind of animal could survive in that terrain, not for long. The weather will likely be our sole obstacle. We’ll need to get through it as quickly as possible.”

“Twilight and I can put a shield up,” Taya said. “That’ll block out the bad weather.”

“Not tornados,” Kat said. “I’ve never seen anything like that before!”

“Twilight can bust those,” I said. “I’ve seen her do it. That was a magically made tornado, but I don’t think it’ll make a difference.”

“That mare is extremely impressive,” Watcher said.

“Sometimes. Taya and I will likely need an energy boost. According to Felix, it gets dark down there much earlier than it does here.”

“Who?” Kat asked.

“Princess Gilda’s cat thief,” I said. “He apparently got arrested for loitering in Gryphus. Before he could bust out, they realized he was a master thief wanted all over the planet. She decided to give him the choice of serving her or living his life in a prison cell with no lock to pick. Once this is done, she might give him a few more tasks before setting him free.”

“Oh, the tabby that was eyeing you up?”

“That’s the one,” I said.

“In regards to your energy, I believe Zecora has a fix for you,” Watcher said. “She’s been working on something to help you survive on your own at night, in case you ever get separated from us again. She was hoping you and Taya could test it on this trip.”

“That’s doable,” I said. “What is it?”

“Some kind of potpourri,” he replied with a shrug. “I think you’re supposed to keep it in a bag and breathe it in whenever you get tired. It’ll give you a small energy boost.”

“Sounds neat. I’m down. Taya will use magic to keep awake for this trip, though.”

“Why?” she asked.

“Just in case it isn’t safe,” I said. “This is a trial. It doesn’t matter if I pass out and die, but you’re—”

Kat cut me off by slamming into me with a hug. “Don’t,” she hissed.

“I will test it,” Taya said. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head, mommy!”

“Zecora actually already tested it herself,” Watcher said. “It works just fine. The reason I said it’s a trial is because she isn’t sure if it’ll work on the tree parts of you. But it’s absolutely safe.”

“See, you should have opened with that,” I said, crossing my arms behind Kat’s back. It probably looked like I was hugging her, but I was really trying to be petulant.

“Yeah, but where’s the fun in that?”

“Brook, please boop him for me.” She did so without a word. “Thank you. So, Taya and I have our energy solution. Is there—”

Spike walked in and immediately shouted, “I KNEW IT!”

“Did you really just come in and interrupt our fucking briefing to be a whiny little bitch?” I asked.

That actually made him blush. “W-well… no, but come on! Just admit you like hugs, Nav!” Kat giggled and pulled me tighter.

“No, fuck you. Now what did you want?”

“Oh, I just wanted to ask if you wanted me to bring Princess Gilda up for the briefing.”

“If I wanted Princess Gilda here, I would have sent for her.”

“...That makes sense, I guess. So… group hug?”

“Out.” His ear spines dropped and he sighed before walking out, head hung low. Once he was far enough away, I quietly said, “What is with him recently?”

“Everybody already knows you like hugs,” Watcher said. “He found out when he read your journals in Antarctica and then he told all of us.”

“That fucking bastard!”

“It’s not like we didn’t already know,” Kat said. “You make it pretty obvious how you really feel, given that you’re still hugging me!”

“Shut your whore mouth. I’m gonna have to do something horrible to that piece of shit!”

“Why?” Brook asked. “He only did so in an attempt to get closer to you.”

“Oh, so you think it would be okay for a water elemental to just invade my mind and steal whatever information they wanted without permission?”

“Absolutely not,” she immediately answered. “And now I understand. It was a breach of your privacy. You have every right to be upset. However, I advise talking to him about it instead of doing something horrible to him.”

“Tch. We’ll fucking see. Is there anything else?”

“What’s our position on potential hostiles?” Watcher asked. “Do we determine if they’re actually hostile or attack on sight?”

“We know the ones in the forest are hostile, so we kill them on sight. We’ll find out if the ones in the fortress are actually hostile before attacking.”

“What do you want the ships to do?” Gourd asked.

“Once you drop us off, back away from the forest and keep the antenna pointed at the forest. We’ll radio you for a pickup when we’re ready.”

We actually heard the next person walking up before entering. Her presence was announced by loud, heavy hoofsteps that proceeded straight to the door. Luna finally turned the corner and bowed to me before entering, covered in badass looking black full plate armor that literally resonated with power. “I am prepared, Nav.”

“Just in time. Watcher, go prep an away team. Taya, you’re also going with them.”

“How?” she asked. “Want me to make wings?”

“I shall carry you,” Luna said. Her horn lit up and a saddle appeared on her back. “Back in the day, my most elite troops acted as cavalry for our cat auxiliaries. I myself am a well-trained battle mount. I will not let your daughter come to harm, Nav.”

“I know. I thought nobody knew the cats existed.”

“That’s what happens when Celestia rewrites history to suit her own needs. Things get forgotten. I have led many armies of many types comprised of many different soldiers of at least a dozen races. Ponies have not always lived alone. There was once a time we had close allies in the world. There was once a time my sister and I were respected by other races instead of feared or despised.”

“Neat. I want you to write some history books whenever you have spare time.”

“As you command. Shall we ready your troops, Watcher?”

He looked my way. I nodded. He looked back to Luna and said, “Let’s go.” The two of them walked back out, Luna clunking like crazy.

“Go with them, Taya,” I said.

“Do I gotta?” she sighed.

“Yes. Don’t you wanna help blow something up?”

“Oh. That’s a good point. Okay!” She practically pranced out the room, humming with joy.

“Do you have any more orders for us?” Gourd asked.

“Nope.”

“I have a request,” Brook said. “Lower the ships and drop the ladder so my sisters can return once they have finished scouting.”

“Do it,” I said.

“Should we disengage the ships?” Gourd asked.

“For now,” I replied. “Once you guys drop us off, you can dock again if it makes things easier.”

“Then I’ll head back to my ship,” Sketch said, sketching a bow.

“And I’ll pony the helm,” Gourd added. The two of them left, leaving me with Brook and Kat.

“So… group hug?” Brook asked, her eyes turning pink.

“Only if you promise to brag about it to Spike later.”

She giggled and swarmed the two of us. It was nice and honestly made me miss having a kind, loving elemental even more.

Because of that, Aqua didn’t let me enjoy it long. She finally forced me to let Kat go. “Time to head out,” I said.

Brook didn’t let go, though. “So why won’t you just admit the truth?” she asked.

“Spite. If he wasn’t being such an asshole about it, I’d tell him. But if I repeatedly tell him not to do something and he does it anyway, I’m not giving him the satisfaction.”

“So you would prefer lying to him?”

“If he prefers going against my wishes, yes. If he apologized and respected what I say, I would consider telling him the truth.”

“That’s fair,” she said, finally letting me go. “Have you considered telling him that?”

“Fuck no. That would just confirm it. If he wants to do the right thing, it’ll be without any external pressure. If he’s incapable, then he’ll never get the truth.”

“Ah. Before I began asking why you did things, I always assumed it was an obstinate refusal to see sense. Now that I have begun taking the time to understand, it surprises me how much of what you do is based in some manner of logic.”

“That’s our lady for you!” Kat sweetly said.

“Some manner?” I asked.

“Indeed. You do not draw many of the same conclusions a water elemental would, but the conclusions you draw are still generally valid. I do wish you would consider the opinions of my sisters and I more often, but we would never do anything to force you to.”

Hurray for dramatic irony. “So you keep saying. Now, let’s join the others.”

They both followed me out to the deck. Luna’s away team was already flying to the dome. The crew was working on disentangling the ships. Kat walked with me over to the railing facing the dome while Brook fucked off to do her own thing.

Once we got there, she looked around the deck for a moment before grinning and locking arms with me. When she was comfortable, her tail snaked up my cloak and slowly wrapped around mine and she laid her head on my shoulder. “You’re so comfortable, my lady,” she said.

“Good to know. Any reason in particular you’re so cuddly today?”

“I missed you, silly! And Felix is watching, so I wanna make him jealous.”

“Well, I would suggest a quickie, but I don’t think we’ll have time and I don’t want to take all my armor off.”

“Too bad,” she sighed. “Although…” She started patting around my waist, looking for a place to slip her paw in. Unfortunately, it was more of a bodysuit, so she didn’t find any entry points. “Shoot!”

“Hopefully seeing us like this will be enough.”

Luna and co were finally approaching the wall. After about a minute of hovering in front of it, she shot a small lance of light at the rock. Taya shot her own lance of light at it a few meters away. I couldn’t really tell what was happening until I noticed what looked like lava flowing down the side of the rock.

“Are they melting the rock?” Kat asked.

“Looks like it. I wonder why they’re doing that instead of blowing it up.”

“Easy,” Twilight said from right next to me. “They’re worried about hitting the dome with magic and making it react.”

“That makes sense, I suppose.”

After about half a minute of burning through the rock, Taya’s lance started moving up and Luna’s moved down. Before they could get too far, a group of five pegasi and five griffins started flying at them from the forest.

“Spike, on me!” I called, pushing Kat away. Before he could react, I jumped off the ship and started flying to my daughter.

Spike quickly surpassed me and flew straight at the group of hostiles. The two escorts Watcher sent with Luna flew in front of them, but there’s no way they’d stand a chance against the coming wave of enemies.

Luckily for them, they didn’t have to. Spike got to the group right as Taya turned her attention that way. She used magic to break the wings of three of them while he immolated four more. The survivors turned their attention on Spike just in time for me to get my gun up and shoot two of them out of the air. Spike grappled with the last griffin and sent him tumbling from the sky with a few very painful looking scratches.

Taya turned her attention back to her task while I flew up to the rocky wall. I gripped it with one hand to hold myself steady, since hovering is a motherfucker with my shitty wings.

“We have things well in hoof,” Luna called. “You may return to the ship, Nav.”

“I don’t mind staying,” Spike said.

“I won’t be much use just hovering,” I said. “Keep them safe.”

“You got it,” he replied.

I pushed back off from the mountain and started lazily flying back to the ship. At that point, I could see three water elementals sliding up the ladder. Since I was pretty curious what they had found out, I sped up and made it back shortly after they got to the top. Kat immediately wrapped herself around me again as I walked over to them.

“So what did you find?” I asked.

“Nothing,” Ice replied.

“...Nothing?” I asked.

“Indeed,” Rain said. “They have no minds.”

“Or memories,” Raine added.

“No thoughts.”

“No emotions.”

“Truly blank slates.”

“Working purely off instinct.”

“We couldn’t even control them!”

“They would make truly horrible hosts.”

“I concur. That forest and the abominations within should be razed to the ground.”

Ice finally broke in with, “I disagree. There’s definitely something wrong with the beings in the forest, but that doesn’t mean they should all be killed.”

“Good news, then,” I said. “We’re going around the forest. Luna and Taya are working on cutting a hole through the mountain now.”

“...You didn’t even wait for our report?” Ice asked.

“I was planning on going around as soon as I realized it was an option,” I said. “I just wanted to know if you could find any useful intel before we did so.”

“I see. That isn’t what Brook told us.”

“She must have misunderstood. Would one of you pull up the ladder? I’m gonna talk to Gourd and get the ship moving.”

“As you wish,” Ice said. He turned to do that while the rains dicked off to circleschlick with the rest of their sisters.

Kat and I went up to the staircase. I was too lazy to actually walk up it, so I just said, “Hey Gourd, start moving us toward Luna.”

“You got it, my lady,” he replied. A few seconds later, the ship started moving forward.

Kat and I moved back to the rail, where I asked, “So how long are you gonna keep this up?”

“Until we get to the dome,” she said with a shrug. “Is it bothering you?”

“No, you’re warm and comfy.”

“I’m happy to hear that, my lady.”

By the time the ship got to the mountain, Luna and Taya had a fairly sizable hole punched through it. Not large enough for the ship to fit, but easily big enough for all of us to make it through. They used magic to push the plug through the other side, sending it careening down the crater. As soon as it was clear, their team flew back to the ship and landed. Taya immediately trotted back up to me with a grin on her face.

“You did good, honey,” I said. “Why’d you break their wings instead of killing them, though?”

“I wanted to make it more painful and scary for them,” she sweetly replied. Wow.

“Makes sense,” Kat said.

“I’m sad to say that they don’t have any emotions,” I said. “And they probably also can’t feel pain, either. The elementals tried interrogating them but couldn’t get anything.”

“Oh. Well, it was also easier,” Taya said. “Wings are easy to break.” Mine twitched. “Don’t worry, mommy! I’d only ever break yours if you tried to leave me!”

Wow. Again. “Um.”

“And then I’d take you away somewhere so you could never escape my love!” she happily added, her voice dipping down into an uncomfortable mania. “But that’ll never happen because you’ll never leave me. Isn’t that right?”

“...Right.”

She hopped up and hugged me. “You’re the best mommy ever!”

I slowly looked over to Kat. She was smiling warmly at my daughter. There was no concern in her eyes at all over what we both just heard. So am I the only one that thought that was horrifying?

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Aqua said. “I think it’s endearing! Your little pet filly just loves you so much! Really, I think it’s perfectly normal to want to kidnap the object of your affection and hold them hostage until they love you back. If anything, you’re the weird one here!”

No one else was standing around me, so I didn’t really have anyone else to ask. Lacking other options, I just hugged my daughter back, pushing the concern down in my mind. After all, it wasn’t like I ever actually would leave the only nice thing I had in life, so I had nothing to worry about.

While I was paying my hug tax, our ship finally pulled up alongside the hole in the mountain. We couldn’t get close enough to put the bridge up because the balloon was too large to fit next to the dome, but it would be an easy feat for the pegasi and griffins to ferry everyone across.

Watcher approached me as I let Taya go. She continued hugging me, though, which left me with two very warm and fuzzy spots. “Who’s going across first?” he asked.

“Me and Twilight,” I said. “I want the first look and I want her to assess whether or not a magical shield will cut it.”

“You got it,” he said. His horn lit up and two pouches appeared. “Here’s the potpourri from Zecora. Whenever you get weary, just open the pouch and breathe into it for a few seconds. The effect will get progressively weaker the more you do it until you sleep, though.”

“But it’ll keep us going for a little bit longer,” I said, taking one of them and dropping it into a pocket in the cloak. Taya grabbed the other and floated it to her side.

“That it will. If you run out of uses, we’ll keep you going with magic.”

“Sounds good. Where’s Twiggles?” She certainly wasn’t on the deck.

“Below,” he said.

“I’ll go get her,” Kat said.

“Then I’ll be waiting in the hole.” I hopped over the side before they could reply and glided to the long hole in the mountain. As soon as I touched down, I pulled up my rifle and walked to the far edge. My mouth immediately dropped.

Despite what Felix said, a part of me was expecting the inside of the crater to be a barren wasteland. Instead, it was full of flowers of all different colors, including combinations I’ve never seen before. There were also huge trees bearing fruits that looked out of this world. The entire place seemed like a huge tropical paradise surrounded on all sides by huge rock walls. There weren’t any huge storms at the moment, but it did appear to be raining in some areas.

After a few seconds of staring in wonder, I lifted my scope up to get a better view. That helped me see some kind of haze over everything, what looked like spores of some kind. Every time they touched down, something new grew.

“We must be wary,” Aqua said. “It is possible those spores can affect us. At the very least, they might affect you and your daughter.”

With luck, the shield will block them. As I continued perusing the area through my scope, I saw a bright flash, followed by a loud thunderclap. Just like that, half the dome was engulfed in a lightning storm with what looked like gale force wind. “Jesus.”

“That’s not at all what I was expecting,” Twilight said from next to me. “I feel like Rainbow Dash would have a field day in here!”

“Until she exhausted herself. What do you think? Is a magical shield gonna cut it?”

“Well, I’d certainly feel more comfortable with my brother here… but I’m confident we’ll make it. Kat also mentioned something about tornados. Luna and I should be able to take those out.”

“You know, I’ve seen a lot of weird shit in the world, but this place might well take the cake. I wouldn’t mind spending a few days just watching what happens.”

“I agree,” she said with a nod. “I imagine the amount of books I could write about it would be never-ending. There’s no telling what effects those fruits have or what the flowers could be used for. Even the wood in the trees might have special properties!”

“So, you ready to bring everyone else up?”

“Yep! I’ll keep an eye on this side.”

“And I’ll keep an eye on the forest while everyone crosses.” She nodded and I went back to the other side. “Start bringing everyone over!”

Between the pegasi, the griffins, and Spike, getting everyone across the gap was pretty easy. Kat joined me in watching the forest, using her crossbow to keep it covered. Thankfully, nothing else tried coming after us. If I had to guess, I’d say they used up all of their flyers and didn’t really have any options.

Once the last of our troops was across, the ship started flying away. There wasn’t enough room in the hole to keep everybody there, so Twilight began lowering people from the top while Luna grabbed them from below.

Soon enough, it was just me, Taya, Kat, Twilight, and two pegasi on the ledge. The others were waiting for us down below, standing on the rocky edge just before all the vegetation. “Last chance to back out, Nav,” Twilight said.

“Why would you even say that?” I asked, slinging my rifle.

“I dunno. In case you were having second thoughts?”

“Psh, I live for this shit.” I wrapped my arms around Kat and jumped down, letting my wings slow my fall. As soon as I touched down, I stumbled and would have fallen if not for Kat. My eyes instantly started burning and I pushed her away so I could fall to my hands and knees. Despite eating a light breakfast, I actually vomited it all up and continued retching as everyone tried crowding around me.

Thankfully, Luna fixed that by opening a hole with magic and inserting herself. Her horn pressed against me and a wave of magic poured into me, but nothing happened and I continued shivering and retching. I heard the same thing happening next to me and I looked over and found that it was also happening to Taya.

What the hell is happening?

Luna grabbed my head with a hoof and forced me to look at her. As soon as our gazes met, her eyes widened. “Your eyes! Water, I need a waterskin!” One of the guards hoofed her one and she opened it with magic, then splashed me in the face. Once that was done, she lifted it to my mouth. “Drink deeply, Nav.”

The retching had stopped, so I was able to actually do so. The cool liquid filled me with life and I could vaguely tell that they were doing the same thing for my daughter. When the waterskin was empty, I slowly and achingly got to my feet. Kat placed a paw on my shoulder when I swayed, but I managed to stand. Once I did so, I felt a massive surge of energy. The strands of my hair that I could see were now green. I grabbed one of them and lifted it up just in time for an actual flower to bloom at the end of it, making everyone gasp. I grabbed more of it and saw that cherry blossoms were blooming like crazy all over my hair.

“What the absolute fuck?” I hoarsely asked.

“It is part of your transformation,” Luna replied. Her horn lit up brighter and a mirror appeared facing me. “Look at your eyes.”

I did so and found that they were now a bright emerald green instead of the dark green they had been. “Holy hell. Is this permanent?”

“I honestly do not know,” she said. “It appears that the same is happening to your daughter.”

It took Taya a little bit longer to recover, but she was finally able to stand and was swishing her flowery tail around in wonder. It made her look even more adorable than usual. After a few seconds of thought, I undid my ponytail and shook all my hair free.

“Alright, show of hooves, paws, talons, and claws: Who thinks this is cute as heck?” I asked. Pretty much everyone but the fire elementals lifted their arms. “Awesome. Then shall we get this show on the road?”

“Are you sure you’re feeling alright?” Twilight asked.

“I have literally never felt better,” I replied. “I have so much energy right now that I feel like I could suplex Luna.” That made her lift an eyebrow. “Not that I’m planning on it, you’re probably just the heaviest one here.”

“Do you want one of us to check you over?” Brook asked. “It would only take a moment.”

“I’m good,” Aqua made me say. I finished with, “Besides, you have absolutely no standard with which to compare me, so it wouldn’t matter anyway. I say we get this show on the road.”

“It wouldn’t even take a moment,” Brook said.

Aqua rolled her eyes and surged over me. “Such a baby,” she said while forcing herself on me. “There’s nothing wrong with a little medical check. And for what it’s worth, you’re fine.”

“How about you fucking don’t?” I asked when she was done violating my holes.

“If Nav wishes to reject our assistance, that is her prerogative,” Brook said. “We must respect the wishes of the mortal races.”

“Why?” Aqua asked. “Half of what Nav says is completely moronic and the other half is self-destructive.”

“I have a counterpoint,” I said. “Go fuck yourself.”

“A powerful argument,” Luna said with a nod.

“Truly words for the ages,” Kat said, wiping away a fake tear.

“Another wonderful inspirational quote from our lady,” Gourd said.

“The greatest orator of our time!” Watcher added with a grin.

“The fact that she somehow manages to inspire loyalty in those around her is just proof of how easily misguided mortals are.”

“Another counterpoint: Eat a bag of dicks.”

“This is wasting time,” Char finally said. “We need to get into the ice dome before night falls or the weather gets worse.”

“Flo, slap Aqua for me.” Flo reached over and popped Aqua in the back of the head. “Luna, Twilight, get that shield up. Watcher, assign some people to the edges to keep an eye out for any danger. Char, Blaze, you’re on point. Find us an easy path through the trees. Waters, kill every piece of small flora in the way so we don’t run into poison. Griffins, keep an eye on the sky and warn us if you see any weather changes. Kat, Taya, keep being adorable. Spike, keep an eye on the princess.”

Luna and Twilight put their horns together and a large blue field surrounded us all. All of Watcher’s squads immediately rushed out to the edges. Char and Blaze started moving forward and the water elementals flanked them in an arc. The griffins surrounded their princess and started watching the skies. Kat brushed at her face coquettishly and Taya fluffed her hair out and giggled. Spike followed the princess’s entourage, looking fairly out of place.

As soon as everything was suitably in motion, I took my place at the center of madness. Flo appeared next to me and bowed. “Are you ready to move out, Nav?” she asked.

“Let’s do it.” Our expedition finally began in earnest.