Author's Notes:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tWgpCmni6kJAoAX2gy-qPr0STT-F8IU0sKWBFn7Vmyc/edit

The morning after was, as far as morning afters go, a pretty fucking shitty one. When my beleaguered mind finally dredged itself back to consciousness, it did so to two separate worlds of pain. The first and worst was my head. The much lesser but still not inconsequential were my lady parts.

I didn’t even try opening my eyes, because I could tell it was bright wherever I was and knowing where I was wouldn’t do me any good until my body was capable of pretending to live again. Instead I groaned and reached out to both sides of me. The way I figured, if my lady parts were aching, there was a pretty good chance I spent the night with at least one someone and they might still be in the semi-soft bed with me.

Sure enough, I didn’t have to reach very far to feel something soft and fuzzy. I poked it a few times before it—or rather, he—grunted. “Get me water, fuzzy thing,” I croaked, trying to sound like something other than a zombie.

“Right here, my lady,” he quietly said, putting something against my lips. It felt like a waterskin, so I did my best to try to grab it before realizing my body wouldn’t cooperate. Instead, I let him slowly drip some down my throat.

Once I had some life fluid in me, I realized what he said and I groaned again. He just called me his lady. Watcher’s gonna fucking kill me. Ugh, at least it’ll put me out of my misery.

When I groaned, he pulled the water back and brushed a hoof against my face. “Are you ready for me to heal you now, Nav?” he asked. I finally recognized the voice. It was Gourd, so at least I didn’t fuck one of the random guards.

“Yeah.” He carefully poked me on the nose with what I figured was his horn and I very quickly started feeling normal again. Still dry and dehydrated, but at least it no longer felt like someone tried using my head to buck apples. Before I opened my eyes, I shivered and said, “Please tell me we’re the only two in this bed.”

“We’re the only two in this bed.” I sighed in relief. “That said, Spike told me they had to drag you back to the ship because you were about a hair’s breadth away from asking a table full of dog mercenaries about twice your size to have sex with you.” I sighed in disappointment. At myself, that is, not that I wasn’t able to have a train run on me by massive dogs. “Gilda wanted to let you, but Spike and Kat thought they would literally split you in half on accident.”

“Did Doppel do it instead?”

“No, she passed out before you left the restaurant. Given what I know about the relations between dogs and changelings, they probably would have literally split her in half on purpose.”

Since I could finally move again, I reached up to clear the crust out of my eyes, then finally opened them to greet the day. The first thing I saw was the waterskin still floating right next to me. I grabbed it and almost immediately drained it.

“Thank you, fuzzy thing.” I started to sit up, but he put a hoof on my shoulder and pushed me right back down. “I gotta say, I admire the enthusiasm, but my honey pot’s feeling a little broken right now. I’m gonna have to take a rain check on round two.”

“Round six, actually.” My eyebrows shot up. “You told me that if I was going to have sex with you, I was going to do it until you literally passed out from pleasure, pain, or alcohol poisoning.”

“Wow. That explains why it feels like I let the whole ship take a turn. God damn, dude. That’s impressive.”

“Thank you. It also means I’ll be spending most of my day in someone else’s bed, because this bed is disgusting and my lower body hurts like nothing you’d believe.”

“Trust me, I believe it full well. Anyway, I got stuff to do today.” I tried sitting up again, but his hoof didn’t move. “So uh… Can you let me go?”

“I’m afraid not just yet, my lady. We need to talk.”

“If it’s about my deplorable behavior last night, can it wait?”

“It’s not about that.”

“Thank god. So what do we need to talk about?”

He finally pulled his hoof back. “I’m going to tell you about my night, starting with when you and the others got back to the ship.”

“Alright.”

“I realized you guys were back because Gilda stuck her head in my room and let off an extremely impressive belch. I didn’t know birds could burp, but she did. Then she asked, in what sounded like a very inebriated voice, if I would kindly… well, she wasn’t actually very kind about it, but she did ask if I would fly the ship back to the castle.”

“Dude, Gilda’s kinda a bitch. Just sayin’.”

“The story isn’t over, Nav.”

“Right, sorry.”

“So I got layered up and went up to the deck. You were hanging on Spike like he was the only thing holding you up, which was probably pretty close to the truth. You were also crying and he was trying to placate you. I’m not really sure what started it, but I think you were trying to tear off your dress.”

“Wow, I guess I felt bad that I made Spike lose the bet.”

“Still not done.” I nodded and let him continue. “I knew I couldn’t just let him deal with that, but getting the ship back to a stable port was a little more important. I didn’t realize it at the time, but Kat and the naga were not on board.”

“God dammit, not again. I don’t remember her drinking any last night, but I know he did.”

“Well, that’s still not the point of the story. As soon as we got moving, Spike literally dumped your crying body on me and went back belowdecks.” I’m going to have to have yet another talk with him about Gilda, I take it. “That’s when I realized what you were crying about and why you were trying to rip off your dress. You kept talking about how it felt so wrong, about how everything felt so wrong, about how you hated wearing dresses and looking pretty and being a girl.”

I felt a pit form in my stomach. “Oh.”

“I couldn’t really deal with that and flying the ship at night in the snow at the same time, so I just made sure you didn’t hurt me or yourself until we got docked. Then I brought you inside and tried putting you in your bed, but your daughter was in there and asleep and I wasn’t about to let her see you like that.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course. I brought you here instead, so I could keep an eye on you and try to get you to stop crying. I ended up getting a very impressive list of things from you that you absolutely despise. I started writing it down so I could talk to you about it point by point, but I ran out of paper and then had to reuse what I did have later. It included dresses, being a noble, Celestia, Luna, being a parent, dresses again, having a vagina, periods, skirts, dresses, bras, having boobs, being stared at, wearing dresses, being stared at while wearing dresses, dresses in general again—”

“Yeah, I hate dresses, I get it. So what’s the point of this, Gourd?”

“I’m still not done, Nav.” I sighed and rolled my eyes. “After talking about hating dresses some more, you finally decided that about the only good side of being a disgusting girl was how much sex you could have and about how refractory periods weren’t a thing anymore. And that’s when you went from crying to begging me to have sex with you.”

“Dude, how the fuck did you go from listening to all that to actually agreeing to have sex with me? Did I… I didn’t order you to, did I?”

“No, actually. In one of the only moments of lucidity you had while begging me for sex, you said that you would never, and you said never several times, order me or anyone else to have sex with you, and that if you did, you were preemptively ordering me to nonsexually spank you and then tell Watcher on you.”

“Well… At least there’s that. So did you pity me so much that you actually decided to fuck me?”

“No, I made a deal with you. And since I knew you would try to weasel your way out of it this morning, I reused that paper to make a few contracts that we both signed.”

I smirked. “I was drunk. That contract is meaningless.”

He cleared his throat and continued. “Then I showed you the law saying any contracts signed by the noble and his vassal while the noble is inebriated are, in fact, legally binding. You said a lot of curse words and called me several names, then forced me to get more paper and write up another contract, since I was so clever.”

“God dammit. How many legally binding things did I fucking sign last night?”

“As far as I know? Three. Here’s the last one you made me sign, since you won’t be nearly as upset about it.” His horn lit up and a sheet of paper flew over to me.

I snatched it out of the air and read it to myself.

‘I, Lady Navarone of the Everfree Forest, agree to let Flash Gourd have sex with me until I literally pass out from pleasure, pain, or alcohol poisoning. In exchange, he will provide me with water, healing, and a very thorough explanation of what the actual fuck I did last night.’

My signature was at the bottom. Next to it was a frowny face. He signed it under that.

“You piece of shit.”

“That was the one you demanded, my lady, and I live to serve.”

“Ugh. What were the other ones?”

He floated another sheet over as well and I snatched it out of the air when it got close enough.

‘I, Lady Navarone of the Everfree Forest, agree to tell Flash Gourd exactly how I really feel about dresses, being a noble, Celestia, Luna, being a parent, having a vagina, periods, skirts, bras, having boobs, being stared at, wearing dresses, being stared at while wearing dresses, and everything else that is upsetting me. I will be the perfect friend and burden him with every single one of my problems. In exchange, he will have sex with me. If I break this contract, I solemnly swear to become Sunshine Smiles’s sex toy.’

Our names were signed at the bottom. Mine was almost illegible, but it was definitely my handwriting.

“You fucking piece of shit.”

Before I could tear the thing apart, he quietly said, “I made several copies of that, by the way.”

“What the fuck kind of bullshit law is that? I don’t believe you!”

“I thought you’d say that, assuming you didn’t remember any of it.” His horn lit up again and a very large and heavy book floated over. “Watcher and I have been doing research on laws governing the relationships between vassals and their nobles. We have a lot more rights than we initially realized.” He flipped the well-worn book open to a marked page. “Read it and weep, Nav.”

The passage in question was highlighted. It explained exactly what the law was and that he was absolutely right. “Why the fuck is this a law? How is this fair?”

“Look at the name of the law.”

I did so. It was called the Noble’s Punishment. “Oh.”

“Yeah. Turns out some nobles back in the day used to get really messed up on salt and order their vassals to do really stupid and dangerous things. This law was put in place to curb such behavior.”

“That… is kinda fair, I guess.”

“I’m glad you agree, my lady. So please, burden me with your problems.”

Is it bad that I’m considering going the sex slave route? No one answered me, sadly. “I’m afraid I don’t have any, Gourd. No deep dark secrets here. Just too much alcohol. I don’t really mind any of that.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “You remember how I said you signed three legally binding documents last night?”

“Oh my god, I am never touching booze again!”

He sheepishly smiled and floated the last of the three documents over. I let him hold it in front of me with magic this time.

‘I, Lady Navarone, declare that I do, in fact, hate dresses, being a noble, Celestia, Luna, being a parent, having a vagina, periods, skirts, bras, having boobs, being stared at, wearing dresses, being stared at while wearing dresses, and several other things. If I deny having any problems or hating any of these things after being shown this contract, I solemnly swear to wear whatever Rarity, Twilight Sparkle, or Doppel decide for the rest of their lives.’

Once again, we both signed at the bottom.

I slowly looked up from the document to his smirking face. “Fuck you, Gourd.”

“I worked with pirates for a very long time, my lady. I know how to play this game.”

“You know that these contracts prove you guilty of rape, right?”

“You were literally begging me for sex.”

“While inebriated. That’s rape, where I come from.”

He rolled his eyes. “Either way, this contract is also legally binding. So when you have me arrested, you better come visit me in jail to tell me all about your problems. Otherwise, you and Smiles are going to be getting a lot closer.”

God dammit. This motherfucker right here… “Why the fuck do you even want to talk about this, Gourd? You have plenty of your own bullshit to deal with. You don’t need any of mine.”

“Do you know why I became your vassal, Nav?”

“Because you wanted my hot human vag?”

He blushed ever so slightly. “Do you know why else I became your vassal, Nav?”

“...Because you wanted my hot human ass?”

“So I could try to get you to open up to me.”

“Open up my hot human legs?”

“Ugh, no! Well, yes, but mostly no!” He sighed and massaged one of his temples for a moment before shaking his head. “The day you saved all of our lives is the day we had all resolved to die. We knew that we were up against a pony ship and we knew their magic would have made short work of our ship without us on it. So we decided that we would rather die than capture another pony ship. We were going to go up on that deck and let ourselves be killed. We had hopes at least some of our foals would be rescued, but we decided it would be better for them all to die than to be prisoners of those monsters.”

“Oh wow.”

“You saved us, Nav. You saved our foals. And doing so hurt you. You had already been through so much and helping us just put you through more trauma. But you wouldn’t let any of us help you. When Princess Celestia offered to set us up anywhere in the world, we all asked to move to Ponyville. She declined, but offered to give us a very nice deal in Canterlot instead.”

“Why wouldn’t she let you stay in Ponyville?”

“She didn’t say.” Typical. “But every day we were in Canterlot, we debated when we would go visit you. Thankfully, the princess remembered us when you had to go to Gryphus. We were overjoyed to see you, and yet… you seemed more broken than ever.”

“Yeah, I went through some shit…”

“When you showed up on my boat to commission me, I had honestly given up hope again. You saw what I was doing to myself. The way I figured, if you let the world break you down, how could I ever stand a chance? But then you came back and you needed us and I knew I would let nothing stand in the way of helping you. I stole, swindled, lied, and cheated to get the parts I needed to make this ship what you needed it to be with the budget I gave you.”

“Why didn’t you just ask for more money?”

“Because you said that was pushing what you had and I wasn’t going to do anything to burden you.” Oh. “Watching you change on this journey has been more than I could have ever asked for, Nav. Helping you like this is a dream come true for me and all of my crew. But we all know the darkness is still there. We know you’re having problems. We know this is affecting you in ways you refuse to talk about. We have always wanted to truly help you, but you never gave us the chance. So as soon as I knew I could tie myself to you, I did. And as soon as I saw the chance to force you to open up, I took it. I know you’re angry and I know you don’t want to talk about any of it, but you don’t have to hide behind toughness or words anymore, Nav. I have the law and righteousness on my side and there’s nothing you can do about it. So take your defeat with a spoonful of sugar and then start talking, because I’m not going any-damn-where until you do.”

I slowly ran a hand down my face. “I have really important things to do today, Gourd. I don’t have time for this bullshit.”

“Oh, I didn’t think you considered finding Smiles that important. But if you think so…”

“Ugh. God, can I just order you to put a pin in this?”

He lifted a hoof to his chin for a moment before tilting his head and lowering the hoof. “I’ll allow you to tell me about just one of the things you hate today.”

“I hate people who force me to talk about my problems.”

He shook his head. “No, no. Specifically, one of the things on our contract. If you don’t pick one, I’ll pick for you.”

I sighed dramatically and grabbed the contract again. My eyes immediately picked one name out. “I hate Luna because she raped me and stabbed me in the chest with a horn. She also tried to murder me a few times and she tried to use love poison on me once. Oh, and she made all the ponies have sexual dreams about me.” He rubbed the back of his neck again and looked away. “Yeah, I bet you remember that, don’t you?”

“Those dreams… probably turned a whole generation of stallions bi…”

“Trust me, I know. So yeah, that’s why I hate Luna. Well, some of the reasons. Now can I finally fucking go?”

“You may leave, my lady. But I’m keeping these contracts well protected and we’re going to have a nice, long conversation when you get back from Iceland.”

“Tch. Maybe I’ll get lucky and die there, then.”

“You know what? I think I’m gonna start a list of everything I find out you hate and ask you about each and every one of them. I think I’ll start with how much and why you hate talking about your problems.”

“Oh yeah, I’m definitely gonna do my best to die there.” I finally slid off the bed and winced when my feet hit the floor. I’m gonna be walking funny today. When I looked around for my clothes, I found… nothing but panties. “What did you do with my clothes, dude?”

“You made me disintegrate the bra and the dress. I think the coat fell off in the hall on the way here.”

“You didn’t destroy these, though?” I asked, holding up the lacy panties.

He shook his head. “In one of your other lucid moments, you said you actually liked panties. I don’t know if you meant wearing them, seeing them, having them, or touching them, but you didn’t hate them and didn’t ask me to disintegrate them.”

Well, shit. That’s one set of semi-fancy clothes gone forever. Rarity’s gonna be pissed if she finds out. “Whatever.” I didn’t even bother putting them on. The ship was mostly empty and everyone left on board had probably seen me naked or wanted to see me naked, so I just walked out in my birthday suit. Hell, as far as most ponies were concerned, wearing panties was more lewd than wearing nothing anyway, so they could all suck my clit.

The only one in the hall was motherfucking Amber Night. As soon as she looked up from what she was doing, I swear to god her nose started bleeding. After dying a little more on the inside, I smiled and waved. “Good morning.” She stammered something incoherent as I walked past and ran my hand down her back. She continued squeaking and trying to say something right up until I got into my room and closed the door.

Taya was somehow still asleep. I couldn’t help but wonder how I woke up before her even though I literally passed out the night before, but I wasn’t about to look that gift horse in the mouth. I had dried cum all over my back and stomach, which made me really regret never giving the captain a chance before. But it wasn’t something Taya needed to see and it was disgusting besides, so I grabbed a towel and went to take a shower.

Amber Night was still in the hall. She blushed very hard when she saw me and redoubled her cleaning efforts, trying as hard as possible not to look at me again.

By the time I was physically clean, the halls were empty. I walked back to my room in peace. Taya was still asleep on the bed, wrapped up all comfy-like in the blankets. I wish I had a camera so I could leave a picture of it in my journals, but resolved myself to just adore the moment instead.

Then I remembered that I had shit to do and quietly got dressed.

As soon as I was ready to greet the day, I let myself back out and walked down to the naga’s room. Kat was just easing the door shut behind her on the way out. She pulled it shut and stopped when she saw me. “He’s finally asleep.”

“What the hell happened to you two? Gourd said you didn’t make it back to the ship.”

She sighed and rolled her eyes. “The naga wandered off. He didn’t take your warning about the alcohol very seriously. I followed and made sure he did not freeze to death.”

“So what actually happened, then? Did you two just get back?”

Her eyes flashed blue for a moment before she shook her head. “I don’t ever want to talk about it, my lady. What happened to you?”

“...I also don’t want to talk about it. Neither of you got hurt or in trouble, did you? That’s all I’ll ask.”

“We did not.”

“Cool beans, fam.”

“...What does that mean?”

“It means good, my friend.” She mouthed the words, as though committing them to memory, and then nodded. “Get some rest and report to Fleur. Pack up everything you need, because the ship might not be staying in Canterlot. You can take Spider if you want.”

“As you command, my lady,” she said with a cute curtsy. “Should I bring weapons?”

“If you think you’ll need them. Please don’t hurt anyone unless you really have to, though. Grab the ring from my room if you want, but do not lose it.”

“As you wish. Did you ask if Fleur would let me compete?”

“I did. She said probably.” Kat actually squee’d and hugged me, purring slightly. It was super adorable, so I hugged her back and just barely stopped myself from petting her.

Once she was done, she pulled back with a large smile on her face. “Thank you, my lady. I won’t let you down!”

“Baller, dawg.”

She suddenly looked very confused. “I’m a cat, not a dog.”

“It’s another human thing. That means good, my friend.”

She slowly shook her head. “If you say so… Anyway, I’m gonna go get some sleep. I’ve had a long night.”

“Sweet dreams.”

“I hope so,” she purred as she walked past me.

I thought about checking on the naga, but decided not to risk waking him. Instead, I poked my head into the room across the hall, Twilight’s new lab. No one was present. I didn’t figure anyone would be, but I wanted an excuse to let Kat get up to her room so it didn’t feel like I was just awkwardly following her.

Once it no longer felt awkward, I went back up to my room, where Taya was still just slumbering away. I popped the gene-locked chest open and pulled out everything but the laptop, then closed it again. There wasn’t much in there that anyone else might need, but there’s no telling how long the trip to Iceland would take and I didn’t want to take chances.

That done, I wandered up to the deck to see if anyone else was up and about. I realized the error of my ways as soon as I opened the door and realized it was probably below freezing. A quick look around determined that no one else was there.

After the feast the night before, I wasn’t any kind of hungry, so I elected to go back into the ship instead of bothering Celestia at breakfast, assuming she hadn’t already eaten. That said, there were still some people on the ship I needed to talk to, so I went on down to the ship’s kitchen. I figured I could find someone there. Sure enough, Sunny was doing her thing, stirring a large bubbling pot of what smelled like vegetable stock.

Her attention was on that, so I said, “Morning.”

She turned her head to look at me and smiled. “Hello, my lady. How was the party last night?”

“Probably fun, but I don’t remember much of it. Do you know if Silver Quill or Spike are awake yet?”

“I know Silver is. She’s always an early riser. Gilda wandered down here looking like a zombie a few minutes ago, but I don’t know if Spike was with her or if they’re even awake now. All she got was water.”

Figures. “Then I’ll deal with Spike later.” The fucking bastard. “Thanks, Sunny.”

“Before you go, are you hungry? I’ve just been cooking to order since there are so few of us left on the ship, and I’d be happy to make you something.”

“Nah, but thanks for the offer. I ate way too much last night and I’m still feeling it.”

“Well… okay, as long as you eat lunch before you leave today. Taya always asks if you’ve eaten and I always hate telling her no…”

“Have you considered… lying?”

She flinched back in shock. “No! I would never stand in the way of a daughter making sure her mommy is well. Especially when said mommy is also my lady and savior!”

“Oh. Have you tried telling her the bad news in a good way?”

“Also no. Usually I just tell her what you like and dislike the most so she can make sure we get more of what you like later and less of what you dislike. I think she’s slowly working your favorite foods out so you’ll never have any excuses not to eat.”

“I don’t know if that’s cute or creepy.”

She shrugged and turned back to her broth. “I gave up trying to figure it out. Have a good day, Nav.”

“You too, Sunny.” Her tail flapped, so I wandered down the hall to the room Silver Quill took over. The door was open and she was not present. The only place I thought she might have been was in the planning room, so I went back to deck to brave the cold to find out.

Sure enough, she had a few dozen pages spread out on the table and was looking through them. A well-used abacus was sitting next to her. She was so engrossed in whatever she was doing that she didn’t even notice when I walked in and closed the door behind me.

“So how rich am I?” I finally asked after watching her work for almost a minute.

She squeaked when I spoke up and almost fell backwards out of chair when she flinched back. Her very wide eyes stared up at me beyond a small pair of reading glasses. When she realized it was just me, she sighed in relief and floated the glasses off. “What was that, my lady?”

“I was asking how rich I was.”

“Ah. In layman’s terms? Very. But even now, I’m still trying to figure out exactly how rich. I know how much you have in the bank, but determining the values of your properties, assets, and items is a nightmare. There’s no legal precedent for any of the magic artifacts you have and the changelings don’t have any records of how many gems are in the mine you have majority ownership in. I’m probably going to have to go there and try to find the foreman. They also didn’t keep any records of what all went into constructing your house near the Everfree, so I’m probably going to have to find a building appraiser and have it inspected. There is a high chance that I will need an apartment in Canterlot soon so I can have time to determine some of these numbers.”

“Then I have good news and bad news.”

Her body seemed to deflate and her ears drooped down. “You… you’re replacing me…?”

“Um. No. Jesus, Silver, I’m not planning on firing you. I know I’m asking a lot and I know none of it is easy. You’re doing a good job with very limited information and you’re really helping keep my life simple. You don’t have to worry about your job.” She has some self-esteem issues, I swear. That got her ears to perk back up, at least. “The good and bad news is that I’m thinking about getting a large house in Canterlot to use as a home base. It’ll need enough rooms to house the crew and my soldiers and it’ll need a place we can dock the airship and move goods. I want you to keep an eye out for places like that. You’ll probably be staying there whenever the ship goes anywhere, along with a few guards and maybe a servant or three.”

“Oh, I can do that!”

“Cool beans.” Her head tilted. “That means good.” She nodded. “If the ship leaves and you need a place to stay in Canterlot, ask Sunshine Smiles. His family owns a really fancy hotel here. If he can’t get you a place for free, let Gourd know and he’ll hook you up with the bits to stay wherever you need while the ship is gone.”

“That’s no problem, I have the money to—”

“You have the money to do whatever you want with it, Silver. I am asking you to stay in Canterlot and do this for me, so I will pay for it. And it’ll be the same once you pick out the house. You’re free to get your own place if you want or you can stay in my place.”

She stared at me for a few seconds before her ears drooped again and tears came to her eyes. She lowered her head to the desk and started actually crying. Oh hell, what did I do this time?

Before I could go over there and try to hug her or whatever, she looked back up, staring at me with wet and red eyes. “You’re the b-b-best e-employer ever!”

That’s kinda sad. “Thanks. I think. Should I get some comment cards so all you guys can leave anonymous reviews?”

At least that made her smile again. She sniffled and said, “I don’t think that’s necessary.”

“Good. I probably would have made you get them anyway.” And that got her to giggle. “I’m not sure when I’ll be leaving today, but if you need any more information from me, I suggest getting it soon. I’ll probably be on the ship for a little while, so I should be easy to find.”

“Of course, my lady,” she said with a nod, her tears mostly forgotten. “I believe I have everything I need, though.”

“Dope as heck, bro.” She slowly lifted an eyebrow. “That also means good.” She nodded and I finally went back belowdecks.

Since Taya was still probably being lazy, I grabbed a few full waterskins and took them to Doppel’s room. Everyone else had people to care for them in the morning, but she was left by herself. As far as I knew, she had never gotten super drunk before so she had no idea what was coming for her. I had no idea if changelings could get hangovers or not, so I erred on the side of caution and brought her four full waterskins.

When I got to her room, she was still passed the fuck out. Thankfully, whoever dumped her on the bed dropped her on her side, though I’m not really sure changelings could vomit. I quietly set the water on the nightstand and then moved her trash can next to the bed. She didn’t even flinch the entire time, so I had a feeling she would be out of it for a while.

As I walked to the door, a haunting thought came to me. Can changelings even metabolize alcohol? I slowly looked back at my maid and watched her for a moment. She was breathing, but it was very slow. I nodded and finished walking out.

Since I didn’t have anything else to do until Spike dragged himself out of bed, I finally went back to my room. Taya was still asleep, but I didn’t care anymore. I just grabbed the laptop and joined her on the bed. She woke up long enough to realize it was just me, then she cuddled up against me and fell back asleep as I started dicking around.

It took her another hour or so to wake up naturally. She did so with a big ol’ yawn, followed by hugging me around the waist and putting her head in my lap. I closed the laptop and pet my daughter, making her shiver in delight.

“How was the party?” she finally asked.

“Fun, I think. I only remember the first half hour or so.” A few blurs came back to me while I was on the laptop, but I knew most of the night would be gone forever. “The naga got drunk again and Kat took care of him. Doppel passed out before we left. Spike carried me back to the ship, then dumped me on Gourd to have sex with Gilda.”

“My night was better. I fell asleep. It was nice.”

“Lucky you,” I said, booping her on the nose.

She grinned and rolled over, presenting her belly. “What time are you leaving today?”

“Haven’t decided yet. It’s going to require Twilight, Gilda, and Spike, so it’ll be some time after they all wake up. Gilda was apparently out of bed a few hours ago, but I don’t think she was in any condition to fly. But I definitely wasn’t going to leave without talking to you first.”

“Good.” She finally rolled back over and hopped down. “I’m gonna go get breakfast, mommy. Are you going to join me this time?”

“Nah, I’m good. I’ll probably be in here if you want to join me again, though.”

“I’ll be right back.” She trotted off down the hall. I popped the laptop back open and went back to rotting my mind with stupid bullshit.

About twenty minutes later, she came back in floating two plates of food. As soon as she got inside, my ring floated off the nightstand and tied itself to her mane. “I brought you breakfast, mommy,” she happily said, flying one of the plates to me. I noticed that there was nothing but stuff I liked on there.

I took a moment to eye the ring in her hair and realized I could either feed myself or be fed. That in mind, I decided to close my laptop and take the plate. “Thank you, dear,” I said, trying to sound grateful instead of angry. She happily nodded and joined me in eating.

When we were done, she floated the ring back to my nightstand, took the plates, and dipped. As soon as I couldn’t hear her hoofsteps anymore, Aerie made herself known by quietly giggling. “She’s so sweet and protective, isn’t she?” the air asked.

“Yeah, she sure is. Do you need something, Aerie?”

“I do not, no. But Blaze would like to speak to you. Alone. He is on the deck. Would you care to join us?”

“It’s not alone if you’re there too, you know.”

“Don’t be silly, Navi! I’m neutral. Blaze may be a lovely and warm fire, but you freed me. I shall be the mediator!”

Oh boy. “Let me grab my coat.”

“No need!” I felt her surround me and then the air around me picked up heat. “I’d be happy to keep you warm in your watery owner’s absence.”

I closed the laptop and stood. “Whatever, I guess.” She just giggled again, so I walked back out and then up to the deck. Sure enough, Blaze was waiting there, his arms crossed. Occasional droplets of water from the icicles on the balloon hissed when they hit him, creating small and temporary craters in his body of fire.

“Greetings, human,” he said in a tone that almost sounded respectful.

“Hello, Blaze,” I cautiously replied. “Aerie told me you wanted to talk.”

“That is correct. My behavior after being rescued was improper. That said, I am not the type to apologize. I merely ask you to take my stress under consideration while you think about my offer.”

“Okay.”

“Become a host to me or my brother that you seek to rescue instead of your water.”

“...I’m going to have to ask you why, Blaze. The waters told me that fire hosts don’t tend to last very long.”

“The waters told you many things, Navarone. How far do you feel that you can trust them? You know what Mist did to me. The… severity of that incident may be isolated, but I guarantee you that all of them have that madness in them. They will go to any length to do what they think is right, regardless of what effect it has on the ones they proclaim to love. I’m sure you’ve seen it yourself, human. How has your relationship with your water gone? How has this Flo treated you? And what does she say in rebuttal even now?”

“Flo has… changed me. There was a time I was certain those changes were something I chose. But these past few days have made me wonder. How much of someone’s personality is them and how much of it is something other people imprint on them? And how can I tell if these changes are something I decided or if something Flo did to me?”

“That is simple, human. What makes you happy?” I couldn’t stop myself from barking a laugh. “What?” he growled, almost instantly becoming irate.

“I never thought I’d hear you say the word happy nonsarcastically.”

“You have been listening to too much water propaganda. Fire elementals do, in fact, care for our hosts. They are our battle brethren, our shock troopers and our clansmen. We do not micromanage their lives with impunity like the waters. We do not seek to change what we see as imperfect. We bolster individuals with our strength. We turn powerful fighters into hive-minded killing machines that are capable of receiving and following orders across entire battlefields at the speed of thought. That is why you should become a fire host, Navarone. My brother or I would turn you into a sister of battle, a true force to be feared. I believe that will be a great boon when we seek to find Nestorats. And we can undo whatever damage the waters may have done to you.”

I took a moment to think. While I was doing so, Aerie caressed my face and began whispering, but I had no idea what she was saying. It was kind of eerie, but I never felt comfortable around her anyway, so it didn’t bother me too much.

“You fought waters in the war, Blaze. Would they brainwash a host? Would they forcefully change violent beings into peaceful ones?”

“Navarone, Mist locked me onto an island in an attempt to do exactly that. She sought to tame me and make me hers. As I said, I was an extreme example, but that tends to be how waters work. They eradicate traits they find distasteful. If their host refuses to change on their own, the water will oftentimes take matters into their own hands. I’ve seen freed prisoners that were honorable soldiers turned into… peacemongers within the span of a year. Brave warriors turned into cowards, all through mental manipulation. Most of them did not even realize how far they had changed until we saved them. Water elementals can manipulate the brain much more deftly than any other elemental. It is very easy for them to subtly release dopamine when you do something they like and cause you stress and anxiety when you go against their wishes. When they put their minds to it, they can slowly change someone until nothing is left of the original but what they consider a bad memory.”

“That is literally terrifying.” I wonder how true it is. And if it is true, I wonder if Flo did it to me.

“The kobolds you saw on the island were once all subjects of fires. They are a very warlike and carnivorous race, by default. But several water elementals captured and enthralled entire tribes of them, turning them from their violent tendencies to a life of peace. Their minds were so far gone that they felt happiness in their broken lives. That is what you risk when you side with a water, Navarone. Peaceful bliss, trapped in eternal happiness, living a life that is not your own. Truthfully, I am surprised the water inside of you is not defending herself. Most despise the truth and will refuse to let any of their hosts hear it. That is why I waited until they were all gone to make my offer.”

“Flo is… not currently inside of me.” He slowly leaned forward. “The other waters realized that she was getting a little bit too controlling and asked her to take a break from me while I was in Iceland.”

“This may be your only chance at freedom, Navarone,” he slowly said. “If you accept my offer, we will protect you. We will restore to you what was stolen.” He reached out a fiery hand. “What do you say, human?”

I looked at that hand for a moment, still thinking. Finally, I came to a decision. “Aerie, you said you are mediating, right?”

“That is correct, my lovely little human.”

“I will use Iceland as a test. I will be Blaze’s host on a trial basis. After all, being able to communicate with the ship and Canterlot might be important. I’ll decide what I want after Iceland. I want you to hold us both to that.”

“As you wish, Navi,” she said with a not-quite-so-cute giggle.

That didn’t really make me feel any better about this, but I tenderly reached my hand out and grasped Blaze’s. He grinned and a wave of fire shot across his hand and into mine. It burned for an instant before jumping inside of me. Once inside, I felt it dig through my veins, tearing at my organs before settling as an intense heat in my head that slowly pounded down to a small heat.

“You made the right decision, Navarone,” he said both in person and in my head. He shook my hand once before releasing me. His head tilted slightly. “You have a very interesting mind, human.”

“Don’t get too comfortable, Blaze,” I said. “And don’t go rooting around where you aren’t wanted. On the off chance this isn’t permanent, I’d rather you not know everything I know.”

“Hmph. So be it. But it will be difficult for me to detect anything your previous elemental did to you unless I am free to look where I please.” I felt the heat in my brain retract to a single point that settled in as something of a dull ache.

“We’ll see how I feel later.”

He rolled his eyes. “As you wish. The pain will recede in time. I guarantee that you will find me a much better match than the waters. If you ever want your wings to be normal again in a timely manner, I suggest finding a way to contact my brother while he is still trapped, assuming he is in a volcano like I was. If he can make you a host as well, you could cut your wing off and have it halfway grown back before the old one hits the ground.” Gee, that would have been really nice to know before I freed you. “Do not forget that I am in your head now. I will not punish impudence as a water would, but that does not mean I would not like respect. The relationship between a host and an elemental is very symbiotic and requires mutual support and respect. I assumed your water would have taught you that, at the very least.”

“It was kinda hard to teach me much when she was too busy slapping me and molesting me.” He flinched back in shock and I thought I heard Aerie gasp.

“She… actually hit you?” Blaze slowly asked. His flames slowly began picking up heat, going from red to orange.

“Yeah. Is that not common?”

“It’s not!” Blaze immediately replied, his entire body immediately turning blue and making me take a step back. “And it’s abhorrent! Hosts are defenseless against their elementals. Striking one is akin to striking a baby.”

“And she… touched you?” Aerie asked, very lightly grazing the crotch of my pants.

“Usually only when I asked, but there were several times she did it to punish me.”

That made Blaze turn white hot, which forced me to back up yet again. I couldn’t feel the heat around Aerie, but I still didn’t want to be too close. “I will have a conversation with your ex-elemental, human,” he growled. It sounded like he was about to go on a rampage, so I decided it might be a good idea to stop talking about Flo. “Do not defend her, Navarone. She will reap what she has sown. As soon as you give me leave to fix what she has defiled, you will realize that it is for the best, regardless of what you might still feel for her.”

“Yeah, but you’re burning so hot right now that I’m worried you might catch the ship on fire. I was just going to change the subject so that hopefully wouldn’t happen.”

“Ah.” I felt Aerie leave my body and surround his. She started whispering again, though I still had no idea what she was saying. Surprisingly enough, I didn’t feel any chill in the air at all. “That is one of the perks you get from a fire elemental, Navarone,” he said as his body slowly reverted to its normal red. “You will no longer feel hot or cold.”

“Cool.”

“No, not cool. I literally just… Oh. I see its meaning in your mind now.”

“Anyway, I totally would cut off my wing and let your brother heal it, but I’m going to be a dragon. Chopping it off wouldn’t do me any good.”

“That is disappointing, but no matter. There will be time later, I’m sure. Another benefit of my kind is that we heal as quickly as demons corrupt. You will not need to worry about further corruption while in Tartarus. Though I do not know if your body could corrupt any further.”

“All the same, I’d rather not risk it.” That said, don’t forget that this is currently a trial basis.

“I will not,” he replied only in my head.

“I think I’ll be heading back below, unless you need anything else,” I said aloud. “Now is feeling like a good time to head to Iceland.”

“Then I shall let you be on your way,” Blaze replied. “Though I will leave you with a warning. Be very wary of letting the waters know you are now my host. That includes their hosts among the crew. I fear they would… not handle it very well.”

“Yeah, I fucking bet. I’m already looking forward to that conversation, trust me.” He snorted and left without further ado, taking Aerie with him.

As I walked back down into the ship, I couldn’t help but wonder if I made a mistake. I knew having Blaze in me was the only way I’d be able to communicate with Canterlot and the ship while I was in Iceland, aside from Spike. But Spike had to have paper and I figured that wouldn’t be readily available in a place where all the residents breathe fire. I was also hoping he’d be able to give me a new perspective on Flo and the other water elementals. It felt like there was a lot the waters weren’t telling me, and my drunken tirade proved that something was wrong in my head.

That said, I knew I had to take everything Blaze told me with a grain of salt as well. He certainly wasn’t unbiased when it came to the waters and it most definitely showed. There’s no telling how much of what he told me was true.

Somehow, I had a feeling that I would have a lot of very tough decisions to make after I got back from Iceland. I was absolutely not looking forward to it.

That said, if the lie detecting spell worked on elementals, things would be a whole hell of a lot easier. I resolved to look into that later.

Taya was no longer in my room. I guess she didn’t feel like waiting for me to get back. I didn’t need her at the moment anyway, so I walked down to Spike’s room. I had a feeling he probably wasn’t in there, but I was going to check just in case.

There was no answer when I knocked. Since there was no part of him I hadn’t seen before, I slowly turned the handle and pushed the door open, trying to be as quiet as possible. Surprisingly enough, he actually was in there, passed out on his bed.

Let’s see… I probably woke up about an hour or two after dawn. That would be eight or so. It’s been about two to three hours since then. It’s at least ten or eleven now. I think it’s time for him to wake up.

As tempting as it was to wake him up by slapping him around and then yell at him for abandoning me the night before, I figured I’d get through to him better if he at least had some water in his system before I started yelling. He didn’t think to set any up for himself, so I wandered down to the kitchen to get him some.

He hadn’t moved at all by the time I got back. Since I figured that would be the case, I got an extra glass to wake him up with. Once I had everything else set down on his nightstand, I emptied the glass onto his head.

Spike shot up, sputtering and trying to get the water out of his face. That lasted for about five seconds before the splitting headache hit him and he fell back into bed with a groan. Both of his claws went to his head as he tried to massage away the hangover.

I knew that wouldn’t work, so I grabbed one of those claws and placed a canteen in it. It took him a few seconds to realize what he was supposed to do with it, but he finally grabbed it and brought it to his dry mouth. He emptied it with a flash and I replaced it with another that he chose to nurse.

Once he got over the initial shock, his bloodshot eyes finally opened and beheld my glorious appearance. “Ugh, what the buck did we do last night?” he whispered.

“We didn’t do anything. I don’t know what you did with anyone else, though. That said, Gourd happened to tell me something pretty interesting. Tell me, how much of last night do you remember?”

His green eyes went blank as he tried to process what I said. It took him several long seconds, but he finally blinked. “Bits and pieces. The last bit or piece is picking you up to help you out of the restaurant.”

Blaze snorted. “I don’t believe him.” How good is your lie detecting skill? “It is… very weak, compared to that of a water. We do not do as well in social scenarios.” Then I’ll have to take him at his word, for now. He harrumphed, but let it go.

Thankfully, Spike took my moment of silence as a chance to drink more water and try to get over the horrible agony. “So I guess you and Gilda didn’t do anything?” I asked.

“I… don’t remember. Why?”

“I’m just surprised. I figured she would have been all over you. Alcohol has ways of bringing people together.” Just ask my parents. That accidental pregnancy did quite a lot to bring them together. For a few years, at least.

His head slowly turned to look around the room. My guess is that he was looking for any signs of his paramour. When his eyes found mine again, he shrugged. “I guess not. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway. What’s the point if I can’t remember?”

“It’s a good way to pass time, at least. Anyway, we need to leave soon.”

“Already? What time is it?”

“Early afternoon. I don’t want to get stuck in Canterlot for more bullshit. Find someone to take care of your hangover and then get some food in you. I’ll find Twilight and make sure she’s ready to go with us. I know Taya is still on the ship somewhere, probably in her room. She might can help with your head. If not her, Sunny, Gourd, Silver, and Amber are all definitely still on board and might be able to help.”

“Can’t you just… I dunno, ask them to come here?”

“After what you did to me last night, you’re lucky I’m not just dragging you out of bed and taking you to Reginald as you are. You’re also very lucky you don’t remember it, or I’d probably be yelling at you instead of trying to be nice. Now get your lazy ass out of bed and get that tail wagging.”

“Uhhhh… What did I do to you last night, Nav?”

“Ask Gourd, if you’re that interested. He’s probably still giddy that you gave him the chance of a lifetime to force me to torture myself. I’m sure he’d love to tell you all about it. But I’m still pretty fucking pissed, so I’m leaving to find Twilight.” And just like that, I left to go find Twilight. I’m sure Spike probably wanted to ask more, but I really wanted to get the mission underway.

She was not in her room on the ship. That kinda stumped me, so I decided to go check her room in the palace. Thankfully, all my time spent in the palace taught me my way around most of it, so I managed to find it without Flo’s help. Twilight’s door was closed, so I (painfully) knocked on the stone door.

It took her almost a minute to answer and she did so with a large blush on her face. “O-oh, Nav!” she said, almost sounding relieved. “I was… just thinking about you.”

“Cool. You about ready to head to the Everfree?”

“Um. I was just uh… in the middle of something.”

“Ah. How long do you think it’ll take? I don’t mind waiting a little bit longer, but I do want to get this show on the road.”

“Well… I was really close to finishing. Maybe you could… help me?” With the tone her voice took and the way her eyes dipped to half-lidded, I finally realized what she was just in the middle of.

“Oh. Sure.” She sighed in relief and used magic to pull me into the room and close the door behind me. “So you were thinking about me during, hm?” That made her blush even more and she started stammering, so I took her breath away with a kiss. Her entire face and part of her neck was bright red when I pulled away. “I think it’s cute.” Her ears started going haywire.

That’s when I gently kicked her front legs out from under her and did naughty things to her right in front of the door. It was great.

Once I was done… or rather, once she was done, she picked me up with magic yet again and floated me down for a longer, more personal kiss. Once she had her fill of me, she pulled back with a happy sigh. “Thank you, Nav. I really needed that this morning. Would you like me to return the favor?”

“Thanks for the offer, but no. I apparently had a busy night. I don’t remember any of it, but my body does.”

“Oh right, the party thing you guys were planning. Why don’t you remember it?”

“Because Gilda and Dash got some mead for us. We got super hammered. Shit was so cash.” Her head tilted slightly. “That means it was fun.”

“Are you… sure?”

“Yes. Well, no, since I don’t actually remember most of it, but I imagine I probably did enjoy a good chunk of it.”

“Oh.” She finally set me back down, thankfully on my feet. “Well, I’m mostly prepared. I left the alicorn amulet on the ship because I don’t like having it near me and I need to make sure my research assistant is still going to join me. Are you heading right back to the ship?”

“Yep. I don’t know if Gilda is awake, but if not, you can poke her with your horn until she drags you into bed as a cuddle-buddy.”

She shivered slightly. “I really need to fine-tune that spell to turn you into a griffin. Gilda always looks so soft and perfect to cuddle with, but I know she would just laugh at me if I asked. Anyway, if you give me a moment to take a shower, I’ll walk with you.”

“...Why would you want to take a shower now? You’re about to go to the Everfree. Why not just wait until you get back?”

“Because you just fingered me and I don’t want everyone to smell me.”

“I don’t mind waiting.”

She smiled. “Then I’ll be right back.” Her horn lit up and she teleported away with a flash and a pop.

“I hope you don’t mind lesbian horse sex, Blaze. You’re going to be seeing a lot of it. And lesbian sex in general.”

“Consenting carnal relationships are extremely healthy, Navarone,” he replied. “What you willingly do with another is of no concern to me. That said, I would greatly prefer watching you dominate her instead of being the submissive partner, but I understand that the water elementals have conspired together to encourage submissiveness in you. With luck, that will be one of the many habits out of which I can break you.”

There were several things I wanted to say to that, but I decided to keep my peace. Thankfully, he respected that.

Instead, I roamed around Twilight’s room, looking around where I presumably wasn’t wanted. Unfortunately, she didn’t have anything too interesting hidden away, at least not that I could find.

She walked back in smelling faintly of roses while I was looking in an empty drawer. “Are you looking for something?” she asked.

“No, just trying to get caught doing something that’ll get me punished later.”

“Oh. Well, that’s the wrong drawer for that. Better luck next time!”

“Hey, it’s not too late. I might manage to push the right buttons on the walk there.”

“I guess we’ll see,” she said with a cheeky grin. “Shall we?”

“Sure.” We set out back to the ship, side by side. As we walked, I found myself hunching down and shoving my hands in my pockets. “So I’ve been thinking about some things and I want your opinion.”

“I think the bulbed ones make you moan slightly more than the tapered ones.”

“Good to know, but not what I meant. And I want your opinion on this, not Aqua’s.”

“...You’re talking about Flo.”

“So Aqua already briefed you?”

“She did,” Twilight replied with a sigh. “She is very opinionated about the matter. So am I.”

“Which is why I’m asking. What do you think I should do?”

“I think you should give it enough time to realize what you want to do. Becoming a permanent host is something that takes a lot of consideration. Flo didn’t give you much time. In fact, according to Aqua, it’s possible she forced you to become her host. Elementals can change memories and they can apparently manipulate our minds so well we don’t even know it’s happening. It’s a frightening concept and the only reason I allow Aqua in me is because I trust that she wouldn’t do that to me. But if you have even a single doubt about Flo, you’re risking having your personality overwritten, possibly beyond the point of repair. It isn’t about whether or not she’s capable of doing it, it’s about whether or not she’s willing to do it.”

“...Or whether or not she’s already done it.”

Twilight missed a step and then actually stopped, looking down. “That is… another thought the water elementals had. I’ve known you longer than anyone else in Equestria. You have changed a lot, Nav. I’m… none of us are entirely convinced that it was natural. I want to believe you’ve become a better, happier person because that’s what you wanted, but it’s entirely possible that you are only what Flo made you. So my advice for you is to take at least a month with no water elemental inside of you and really look at yourself. Are you who you want to be? Are you happy? You’ll need to decide those for yourself.”

I think Gourd might have given me the answer to those questions this morning. “I’ve been considering taking a month or two off when we get back from Iceland. Tartarus is going to be the most ridiculous boss level ever.” She lifted an eyebrow. “As in, it’s going to be really shitty. I want more information, I want more training, I want more time to relax, and I want to go into it knowing I’m leaving as little behind as possible. I want the business with Flo done with by the time we go.”

“I think that’s a good idea. It’ll give me and Watcher more time to learn about demons and the lay of the land in Tartarus. I’m sure the girls would also like the time off. In case… you know.”

“Yeah, I know.” Tartarus was going to be stupidly dangerous. There was a very real chance we wouldn’t be coming back. We went back to walking. “So what does Aqua think about Flo?”

“Ugh, don’t even get her started. Aqua has been staunchly anti-Flo ever since we went to Atlantis.” Probably because I mentioned I was suicidal, if I had to guess. Blaze snorted, which left a small wave of heat in my head. “She’s been second-guessing every action the two of you have done since. Getting trapped in your head when we were against Trixie just made it worse. She is very glad I became her host, because it gives her a chance to keep an eye on you.”

“That’s just so she can make me suffer. I’m pretty sure she hates me.”

Her eyes flashed blue and she missed another step before Aqua picked up Twilight’s gait. “I do not hate you, Navarone,” she said using Twilight’s succulent mouth. “I believe that you do not behave in the way the last remaining human should. I believe that Flo has both spoiled and abused you in various ways. I believe that Flo is bad for you. But most important of all, I believe that you should have the right to choose whatever you want to be. However, in choosing whatever you want to be, you must be prepared for and accept the consequences of your actions. It seems that in many ways, you take having an elemental for granted. You want all of the benefits with none of the responsibilities. Flo was entirely reliant on you for too long. You do not truly know what it means to be a host. I believe that if you want an elemental in you, you must first learn more about that elemental. If you want Flo back, you must earn her back. Though I have the feeling she will be the one who needs to earn her way back into your good graces.”

“‘Kay.”

“I dislike that answer, Navarone.”

“Then I’ll start using it more.”

She sighed in either disgust or disappointment. A moment later, Twilight missed another step and shivered. “Do you ever get used to that?” she asked.

“Flo usually asked before she did it to me. She also usually warns me before she gives control back. She didn’t always ask before giving me orgasms, though. It’s usually pretty awkward.” That made it Twilight’s turn to sigh in either disgust or disappointment. “Anyway, you kept saying that I shouldn’t have a water elemental in me. What about a fire or air? Blaze seemed like a cunt-muffin, but he might calm down now that he’s no longer surrounded by what used to be his mortal enemies, the same group of people that also locked him on an island and tried to break him. And we don’t really know anything about the one I’m about to rescue.”

“Aqua immediately started repeating the word no in my head,” Twilight said. “So I’m going to assume that she thinks it is a bad idea. That said, I have a feeling all water elementals will be biased. I will do my best to talk to Blaze while you are gone, if he is willing. I imagine he knows I am a host, but hopefully he will realize I was a scientist and a student before that. I am interested in all of the elementals, fires included. If he does let me speak to him, I’ll try to get a read on his personality. At the moment, I can’t say it’s a wise idea to become a host to a fire, but I wouldn’t rule it out just because a water says it’s a bad idea.”

“I can’t imagine Aqua is very happy with what you just said.”

“She is incredibly displeased, trust me. However, just as I am a scientist and student before a host, I am also your friend before a host. I want what is best for you, not what the water elementals decide is the best for you. As Aqua said, I support your right to choose your own fate, even if that choice seems unwise at the outset. I want you to be happy, Nav. I don’t want you to feel like a prisoner in your own body. If you think a fire elemental would make you happier than a water elemental, I will support you and defend you from whatever the water elementals happen to say or do about it. And if you decide that you are better off without an elemental at all, I will do the same. This life isn’t for everyone. Truthfully, I’m surprised you lasted as long as you did with Flo without either breaking and demanding her to change or ordering her to get out of you. To me, the very thought that you lasted this long lends credence to the idea that she… manipulated your mind against your will, but that isn’t something I can decide and I’m not entirely sure it’s something I would trust the other water elementals to verify. They want you on their side, and I have a feeling that all of them know that if you find proof Flo tampered with your head, you will never give another one of them a chance. If you ever do let them check your mind, I would like to be present and I would most definitely like to have the lie detection spell hoofy. I don’t know if it would work on an elemental since they aren’t technically alive, but it’s better than taking what they say at face value.”

Good to know I’m not the only one that distrusts them. “You’re a good friend, Twilight, and I’m honestly happy to know you.” She gently bumped into me and we continued in a pleasant silence.

When we got to the ship, she went to find Gilda and I went to find the only pony daughter I had. Thankfully, she was in her room, so it didn’t take me very long. Her door was also open, so I didn’t have to interrupt anything naughty. “I’ll be leaving really soon,” I said. “You’re welcome to go with us to the Everfree if you want.”

“I’ll be ready when you are, mommy!” she happily said, hopping off the bed.

“Cool. Twilight probably won’t need your help to cast the spell, but I’ll be happy to have you send me off. Though I might fly the two of you back to Canterlot so you don’t have to deal with the Everfree yourselves.”

“We could handle it!”

“I know. But if I carry you, you won’t have to. And I love carrying my adorable daughters, so everybody wins.”

Her ears twitched when I said daughters, but she didn’t comment on it. Instead, her horn lit up and the butterfly wings appeared on her back. “Do you already have everything you need, mommy?”

“Yep. Kat is going to hold onto the key and the ring. She might need them. You’re free to stay on the ship if you want, but it’ll probably be moving around. If you don’t want to stay here, you’re welcome to stay in my room at the palace, in our house in Ponyville, or talk to Gourd to get money for a room in town. I’ll leave it up to you.”

“I think I’ll stay right here. The guards don’t like me training with them and there’s nowhere else to practice combat magic in the palace. The ship is perfect for it.”

“Cool. Let Gourd know before the ship leaves. I don’t want him thinking he accidentally kidnapped you or something.”

“Alright.”

I reached down and booped her on the nose. “I’m gonna go make sure Spike is ready, then find Twilight. You’re free to wait on the deck if you don’t mind bitingly cold weather. Otherwise, you can just chill here and wait for us to head out.”

“I’ll be here, mommy.” She was handled, so I went on down to Spike’s room.

He was in there, staring at the crossbow, sword, and shield on his bed. “I would suggest not bringing those,” I said.

“It’s the only hoard that I have, Nav,” he softly replied, not looking at me. “The only things of value that I really truly own.” He fell silent for a few long seconds before looking back up at me. “And you gave me every single one of them.”

“I reckon that’s so.”

He sighed and looked at them again. “They’re the only things I could really bring to show off the life I have now. I might finally find my parents, but these will be all I have to show them. But you think I shouldn’t bring them.”

“Blood doesn’t mean a fucking thing, Spike. Family is who you make it. There’s a saying back in my world. The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. This ship is your family, Spike. I do think finding your parents would be amazing and I would absolutely love to be by your side when you do, but if you can’t find them, don’t think it’s the end of the world. You’ll still have a place here, at my side. And if you do find your parents and they’re disappointed that you have nothing to show them, then fuck them. Your parents should be ecstatic that their long-lost son found them, not disappointed that he didn’t bring a hoard with him when he did.”

“It’s easy for you to—” he started to say, but froze when he realized who he was saying it to.

“It most definitely is not easy for me to say,” I replied. “I knew my parents. They were pieces of shit. But despite that, I miss them. And despite missing them, I made a place here. It’s a place where the broken and lost of the world can come together. It’s a place for people like you and me, Spike. People with no families, no ties, nothing holding us to this world but each other. I said you’ll have a place here at my side and I meant it. But I would be happy for you if you found your parents and I would be happier for you if they were amazing parents that wanted you to stay. That is a choice you might have to make and I want it to be something you’re thinking about now. If it comes time for a choice, I will not try to sway your mind and I will support you no matter what you pick. You’re my friend and I want you to be who and what you want to be, even if it means you will no longer be by my side.”

He finally looked back at me. It was obvious that he was on the verge of tears, so I walked over and hugged him. He wasted no time in hugging me back. It’s kinda weird that dragons can even cry. You’d think the tears would just evaporate.

Sometimes I wonder if I’m a sociopath.

Once he was done with his moment, he pulled away. “Is it time to go?” he asked.

“Yeah. Head up to the deck. I need to find Gourd and let him know we’re leaving and then I’ll see if I can find Twilight. She was looking for Gilda.”

“Then I’ll see you topside, Nav.” We both left his room. He pulled the door shut with all of his stuff still on the bed.

Gilda’s room was a few doors down, so I went to check it out. Her door was open and, sure enough, an unconscious Gilda was struggle-snuggling a conflicted Twilight. “Well, that was supposed to be a joke,” I said, leaning against the door. “I guess she didn’t quite want to wake up.”

“She didn’t,” Twilight whispered. “But she’s so comfy! I just couldn’t wake her up…”

“You should try cuddling with her right after she gets done preening and taking a shower. It’s like getting cuddled by… I dunno, something really soft, I guess. Anyway, let’s get this show on the road. Wake her up, heal her, and get her on deck. If she asks why you’re cuddling, just say the two of you banged last night after she got shit-faced.”

“I’m… not going to do that. I’ll wake her, but I don’t think she would be happy to find that we had any manner of relations.”

“Twilight, call it sex.”

“I don’t think she would be happy to find that we had sex.”

“Thank you. I’m gonna let Gourd or someone else in the crew know we’re leaving. I’ll meet you topside.”

“Alright.” I left her to her dilemma and went to find someone who kept the ship in the air. Gourd wasn’t in his room, of course. Sunny wasn’t in the kitchen. Amber wasn’t roaming around anywhere. As far as I knew, all the rest of the crew was off the ship, so I was kinda stumped. I decided to just say fuck it and leave a note, so I went back to my room, where I found Gourd chilling on the bed.

“Dude, why are you… actually, I don’t care.”

“Too bad, I’m gonna tell you anyway,” he replied before I could continue. “My bed is nasty and I didn’t think you’d be needing yours, so I ended up in here. I gotta say, I like the cloud you have in here. Next time we do anything, we need to do it on your bed.”

“If there is a next time.” Given by how much he’s annoying me with his sappy friend bullshit, that chance is shrinking.

“If, when, whatever. I figured you would have been gone by now, either way.”

“I was actually looking for one of the crew members so I could tell you guys that I’m about to leave and to heal Doppel when she wakes up. I couldn’t find anyone, so I was coming here to get paper for a note, since I know you don’t have any in your room anymore.”

“Not anymore, no, but I’ll be keeping a large stock in there from now on. After all, there’s no telling what other contracts I might be able to get.”

“Go fuck yourself with barbed wire. I’ll see you in a few days or weeks, Gourd.”

“Good luck, Nav.” He smirked. “After all, I wouldn’t want anything bad to happen before you can tell me all about your problems.”

“Suck my clit.”

“Already did,” he said, placing his hooves behind his head and grinning lasciviously.

“Suck my nipple.”

“Did that, too. Only one of them, though.”

“Ugh. Suck my… ass.”

“Alright, now that I didn’t do. Sounds kinda gross, actually.”

“Good, then suck my ass. See you later.”

“See you, Nav.” I went next door to collect Taya and finally went up to the deck.

Spike was already there. Taya pressed herself against my side and then cast some kind of spell that made the air around us shimmery. That was when I realized that I walked out without a coat like it was nothing. Thankfully, Taya was looking out for me and made the air warm so no one had to ask why I wasn’t wearing a coat.

“So what’s taking Twilight?” Spike asked.

“Gilda was feeling handsy,” I replied. “And she didn’t want to wake up. They shouldn’t be too much longer.”

“Why’s Gilda even going?” Taya asked.

“To help Twilight get more bodies for her necromancy thing,” I said. “The Everfree has a lot of creatures everyone would prefer dead. Twilight needs test subjects. Gilda needs food. It’s a win for everyone.”

“...What about the creatures?” Taya slowly asked.

That one stumped me for a moment, before my burning need to always be right kicked in and gave me a bullshit answer. “They get freed from the horrible existential nightmare that is life,” I said with a shrug.

Taya took that as an acceptable answer and nodded, but Spike slowly lifted what would have been an eyebrow if he had hair. “That’s kinda… out there, Nav.”

“Yeah, well, whatever. Did you ever ask Gourd about last night?”

“No. I figured if it actually mattered to you, you’d actually talk to me about it instead of being super passive aggressive. You usually confront real problems head on and pass small things off to others, so I didn’t think you cared that much or you were too angry about it to discuss it anyway. Either way, I decided ignoring it and hoping it would go away wouldn’t hurt.”

“Oh.” For some reason, that made Taya snicker. “Well, if you’re interested, when Gourd came up on deck, I was apparently bawling my eyes out. As soon as you saw him, you dumped me on him and went below.”

That immediately made Taya stop giggling. Instead, she glared at Spike, who seemed somewhat confused. “Uh. Are you sure?”

“That’s what Gourd told me. He had to stop me from hurting myself, or so he said. You just followed Gilda.”

“Huh. Well, I don’t remember much after leaving the restaurant, so I guess we’ll have to take his word for it. I’m sorry, I guess. I can’t imagine what would make me just leave you like that, but I hope it was worth it.”

“So do I.” It better have been, given what I’m going to have to go through because of it.

Silence came over us and lasted until Gilda dragged herself out of the ship. She didn’t look too fucked up, but she definitely wasn’t smiling. And as soon as she saw the bright light, she flinched back, but powered through it to join us. “So are we doing this or what?” she asked. Her voice wasn’t too fucked up either, so I assumed she managed to get hydrated.

“We’re just waiting on Twilight, now,” I said. “She didn’t have to grab much, so—” The mare herself walked out of the doorway leading into the ship. “Yeah, we’re good to go. Alright, for this large of a party flying over the Everfree, we need to be careful. Keep hostile thoughts to a minimum. Yes, Taya, I’m looking at you.” I wasn’t actually looking at her. She sniffed and presumably rolled her eyes. “We should be high enough above the forest that it won’t pick us up as threats, but it might not be happy when we land in front of Reginald’s cave. Let me try to handle anything that might approach us, unless things look like they’re getting out of hand.”

“Or I could just teleport us all,” Twilight said.

“I like that option,” Gilda said. “My wings are stiff.”

“Can you do that and still turn me into a dragon?” I asked.

“With the amulet, definitely,” she said with a pleased nod.

“Then we’re flying,” I immediately replied. “Stiff wings or not. I don’t want you wearing that thing for one second longer than necessary.”

“A little corruption never hurt anybody,” Twilight said, rolling her eyes. I lifted an eyebrow. “But fine, we’ll fly.” Her horn lit up and cute little butterfly wings appeared on her back. “Since you just have to be difficult about everything.”

“Well, you can always punish me later,” I said. “Anyway, let’s go.”

They all took off while I walked over to the side and jumped off. Most of them jockeyed for positions around me while I just set a steady pace and angled toward the mountain in the Everfree.

The flight should have been very cold, but Taya kept up some kind of heat around all of us, not that I would have noticed without it. Thankfully, everyone kept their thoughts safe enough that no monsters from the Everfree decided to bother us. Or maybe we just got lucky. Who knows?

Either way, we landed in front of Reggie’s cave with no issues. Gilda looked around, seeming somewhat impressed by the number of bones. “I’m gonna go say hi,” I said. A few of them made half-hearted replies, but none seemed interested in joining me. I went into the dragon’s cave alone.

I didn’t get very far in before finding him. “So you are finally here,” he rumbled, rolling off a pile of gold. “I was wondering how long you would make this old dragon wait.”

“Patience is a virtue, one I figured an old man like yourself would have picked up.”

“Hmph. You sound like… never mind. Are you prepared to go to the land of the dragons, Navarone?”

“Yep. Everyone else is waiting outside.”

“Good.” He didn’t move any further, though. After a few seconds, he sighed, bathing me in steam. You know, this is technically his spit. That’s really disgusting, when you think about it. “You and Spike are likely going to learn a few very unpleasant things while you are in Iceland, Navarone. I want you to understand that we only did what was best for all races.”

“And I want you to explain that now so I don’t get blindsided when we go to Iceland.”

He was silent for another few long seconds. His eyes, each one about as large as I was, just stared at me. Finally, he said, “I believe I mentioned a treaty to you, one involving Spike. I did not mention why the treaty existed or what terms were in it.”

“You didn’t, no.”

“It was a peace treaty between the dragons and the ponies, following a… heated disagreement. Celestia… convinced me to tip the scale toward the ponies. You will likely learn far more about it while you are there. I will end with two things: It directly resulted in the creation of the purifiers and the official draconic code and it resulted with the ponies getting one dragon egg every ten years. Forgive me, but talking about it is painful.”

God fucking dammit, he’s just going to leave me hanging. “I don’t suppose you could give me any more information, could you?”

“...No. I hate that I have told you what I have, but I wanted you to hear it from me before you hear the propaganda. I did what I did for the best of both races, even if there are many dragons who do not see it that way.” Well, it sounds an awful lot like you’re a race traitor. “There is more reason than one that I have put off my return to Iceland for so long. But it is time for my self-imposed exile to end. It is time for me to return home. And if you ever want Spike to be able to return to Equestria, you will tell no one that he was born from an egg given to Celestia.”

“...Why?”

He was silent for almost half a minute this time before looking away. “Because escaped hostages are not allowed to run back to their eggnappers.”

“Wait, wha—” Before I could finish asking, he snatched me up and started walking.

“Returning home will be a very interesting experience for me, Navarone,” he said over what I was trying to ask. “Perhaps I have been gone long enough that the others have forgotten or forgiven.”

I’m gonna go with probably not. And given that he wasn’t listening to any of my questions, I decided to stop asking them. One way or another, I was going to get an answer. Then again, it didn’t take too much thinking to come to a conclusion. It wasn’t a very nice conclusion, but it was a conclusion.

It sounded a lot like Celestia bent Reginald’s arm into supporting a treaty between the ponies and the dragons that gave the ponies a hostage every ten years to prevent the outbreak of another war. The dragons couldn’t do anything to the ponies because of all the dragon eggs the ponies had as prisoners. The eggs couldn’t be hatched without some kind of magic, so the hostages could never escape. But Celestia managed to hatch at least one somehow. That meant Celestia was technically experimenting on prisoners, which resulted in Spike being born.

If that was the case, Spike had been a prisoner his entire life, kept ignorant about his people, and was basically brainwashed into being a servant of the ponies. I really hoped that wasn’t the case, because if it was, I might literally murder Celestia. That was just… beyond the pale.

But it sounded exactly like something she and her sister would do.

We got outside while I was still thinking. When Reginald set me down, I noticed that Gilda had departed, but Rainbow Dash had joined the group.

“Sup, Nav?” she asked, nodding at me.

“Nothin’ much, Skittles,” I replied, trying to take my mind off what Reginald just told me. “You see us flying out?”

“Yep. Couldn’t get ready in time to join you in the air, but it wasn’t hard for the Dash to find you!”

“Yeah, it’s pretty easy to miss the only mountain in the Everfree,” I sarcastically replied. She stuck her tongue out at me. “Anyway, are you all ready to see me draconified?”

“Only if you’ll race me!” Dash happily said.

“Sure, I guess. Let me just get undressed.”

Almost everyone present was happy to molest me with their eyes as I stripped down. I knew Dash, Twilight, and Spike would have enjoyed playing with my hot bod. Taya probably also would have enjoyed it, but I chose not to think about that. There’s no telling what Reginald would have liked, and I wasn’t interested in asking. Soon, I was down to nothing.

“You ready?” Twilight asked.

“Yep. Let’s get this over with.” She and Taya walked over and pressed their horns together. They did the same bullshit magic thing as before and soon enough, I found myself turned back into a monstrous killing machine. Well, a dragon, anyway. I guess technically speaking, I was already pretty adept at killing things.

I looked around the clearing with my special eyes and noted with a grin that Rainbow Dash and Spike were having difficulties picking their mouths off the ground. “Having issues?” I asked with a smirk.

Spike recovered before Dash and almost immediately said, “You’re huge!”

“That’s no way to speak to a lady!” I said, trying to sound like I was hurt.

“No, no, I mean… Kumani was… she was like nothing compared to you!”

“That’s… kinda a good point, actually,” Twilight said. “Kumani was a lot smaller than you. There’s no way that relationship would have been acceptable if you were both dragons.”

“Trust me, that’s a conclusion I have already come to. I regret it. That relationship was a mistake. I’m glad both of us realized it and I’m glad she left like she did. Spike, if we run into her, do not tell her who I am. And until I tell you otherwise, don’t tell anyone you were born here in Equestria. Remember what happened at the dragon migration.” He looked down. “They weren’t keen on letting you leave. We’ll find out some information, learn why they didn’t want you to leave, and we’ll go from there. You have my word that we won’t leave without digging into your past.”

“...Alright, Nav. I trust you.”

Before I could do anything else, a blue blur shot toward me and Rainbow Dash landed on my face. “So we gonna race or what, Navi?” she asked, tapping me with a hoof.

“Just say the word, Dashie,” I replied, then used my tongue to lightly yank her tail. She yelped and spun around, but didn’t see anyone. “Feeling kinda… jumpy?” I asked.

“N-no! Just… Whatever!” She spread her wings. “First one to the rainbow falls near Cloudsdale?” she asked.

I’m pretty sure I know where that is. “Sure.”

“Then go!” She shot off before I realized we were doing anything. I spread my wings and almost immediately joined her in the air.

To make a short story shorter, she very handily won. Or maybe very wingidly won. Either way, it wasn’t even a competition.

“I can’t believe you’re slow even as a huge dragon!” she said.

“I can. I have a whole lot of body mass and I don’t know how to use this body that well. You’re fucking tiny and full of magic or whatever.”

“Psh, I’m just awesome.”

“Hey, if friendship is magic and if magic works off the power of belief, then you’re super fast because you have several really good friends who believe in your ability to be super fast. It’s the same with Twilight and magic, Applejack and farming, Pinkie and being insane, Fluttershy and dealing with animals, and Rarity and being annoying.”

“...I think you might have gotten a few of those wrong.”

“Okay, fine, then Applejack with having really sexy thighs. Whatever. Point is, if friendship is magic, you’re never gonna lose a race.” If that’s the case, it kinda explains a lot of what Pinkie can do. After all, she has a ton of friends, which means a ton of people believe in her. It’s no wonder she can do all kinds of horrifying shit that only makes sense in a magical world.

“I think it’s just ‘cause I’m awesome.”

“Sure, let’s go with that. So shall we head back, oh awesome one?”

“Nah, not yet.” She walked over to one of the pools of rainbow and looked into it. “I kinda wanted to talk.”

“Oh. Well I mean, I guess there’s not really a time limit on any of this. What did you want to talk about?” Or at least, I didn’t think there was. As far as I knew, Discord would be fine to wait until the sun blew up. It’s not like he really had much else to do but watch a poor innocent human suffer.

“You, actually.” She fell silent. I knew that if she wanted to talk about me, whatever she was trying to say would probably be hard for her.

“Dash, I am happy to listen to you. And you know that you don’t have to feel weird about anything you want to say. I won’t think any of it’s uncool or whatever. Say exactly what you’re thinking.”

She sighed and hung her head. “Ugh. Way to make me feel awkward.” She finally turned back to look at me. “I’m proud of you, Nav.” A blush actually came up on her face and she rubbed the back of her neck with a hoof. “You’ve been through a lot and had a lot of tough problems, but you’re handling them like a pro. I’m happy for you and proud of you. I know it’s hard for you to adjust to everything you’ve been through, but you’re doing it and you’re doing a good job.” She looked away, still blushing. “It’s super cool, kinda.”

That would make me feel a lot better if Gourd hadn’t just told me everything she said was wrong. “I don’t know if I’m handling it as well as everyone thinks, but I’m trying. And I’m happy that you told me that, Dash. Thank you.”

That just made her blush even more, which was super adorable. “N-no problem… Navi.”

“You know, it’s really pretty out here, Dash,” I said, looking around. “You ever bring any dates here?” Her ears shot straight up and she began stammering even more, trying to say who knows what. I reached a talon out and pressed it against her nose. “Maybe a big strong predator who could teach a tiny little herbivore her place?” Her eyes slowly widened and her wings quickly stretched out. “You know, Cloudsdale is right there. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of them were watching. What do you say, Dashie? Wanna be taught your place while the whole city watches?”

I don’t think she could trust her voice, so she just nodded. The talon against her nose quickly wrapped around her body instead. She squeed in delight.

(Sex incoming. Ctrl+f “Sex is over.” if you’re lame)

Truth be told, I was a little bit afraid of hurting her. I had no idea how strong I was, so I did my absolute best to be careful with her soft little pony body and fuzzy little pony wings. Just being picked up and held was enough to make her moan, though. It felt like something wet was pressing against the bottom of my hand, so I figured she was really into it.

Still, though… “Safe word is coconut,” I said.

“Got it.”

What I did know about Dash is that she was very stretchy. Seeing her with Flo proved that much. I grabbed one of her front legs with one hand and I grabbed her other with my other hand, so I was holding her up like that. I forced her to face Cloudsdale, with her back legs dangling toward the ground.

I lowered her down to my mouth and slowly reached around her body with my tongue, tasting her. She shivered in delight as the tines in the forked tongue prodded both nipples at once, then moaned as the tongue moved up and caressed her chest. Finally, I slapped her across the face with it.

“Beg for it,” I demanded.

“Tch, make me, you overgrown lizard!” she shouted back.

So I went back to work with my tongue. I slowly ran it between her lower legs, very lightly pressing against her lower lips. She moaned and arched her back, then pressed her lower legs together to try to hold me in place. I left the tongue there and moved it to her nipples instead. She gasped as I started circling them and licking them. My draconic tongue was very long and very smooth, but somewhat dry and hot, giving her some very interesting sensations.

When she started panting, I pressed the tongue higher, right against her slit, before shooting it out further to force into her mouth. She gagged on it, but let the large invader slip down her throat. I slowly ran it in and out, throat-fucking her and pressing right into her mare-gina.

Once her legs started trembling, I slurped the tongue back, making her cry out. “Beg!” I ordered again.

“P… please! T-t-teach me my p-place!”

Oh, I do so enjoy Dashie’s voice when she’s desperate. “Your place is to be used as I desire, pony,” I replied. She groaned. I finally took pity on her and popped my tongue back out to very carefully prod her wet axe wound. She gasped again and that’s when I decided to finally impale her.

“Oooh, it’s s-s-so hot!” she cried out.

As soon as I pressed into her, her body seized up and her legs fought against my grasp, but she was unable to get away as I used my tongue to ravage her. She almost immediately came and actually started crying as I viciously assaulted her inner body with my tongue while she struggled to escape. Both her back legs kicked and stretched out, trying to find purchase on anything so she could get away from the overwhelming pleasure.

Finally, I stopped moving the tongue, though I didn’t take it out. Her body slowly calmed down until she was left panting. Her wings were flopped down, limply hanging from her back and her legs were no longer struggling.

Since it looked like I successfully broke her, I began moving my tongue again, making her body flinch like some kind of sexy marionette. She still made the occasional squeak and moan, but it was obvious that I had already broken her. It was actually kinda disappointing, so I resolved to see just how much control over my tongue that I had.

While the tongue was still inside of her, I looped the front of it back out of her body, doubling the width of what was in her and making her lower legs stretch out to the side to try to stretch out her cave. I decided to go ahead and nip that one in the bud by moving both of her upper legs into one of my hands and both of her lower legs into another hand, making her much tighter and forcing her to cry out and start begging for me to stop.

But she knew the safeword and she wasn’t using it, so I ignored her begging and moved the front of my tongue back to her mouth. She moaned in shock when I forced it into her mouth, but she met it with her own tongue.

So I used my extremely long tongue to fuck her candy vag and kiss her at the same time. About half a minute after I started kissing her, I pressed my tongue down into her throat and kept it there, blocking off her air flow. She grunted and flinched, but couldn’t move her head enough to dislodge me.

I began undulating my lower tongue inside of her as she slowly ran out of air. She seemed to get even wetter and almost instantly came as I choked her. Her mind was in complete panic mode and every part of her body was trying to get away from me so she could get air, but she was still riding my tongue as much as she could, too full of ecstasy to care that she was on the verge of death.

When I finally had my fill of skittles (and her body was only barely still struggling), I pulled the tongue out of her mouth to let her get some air. She immediately started coughing, but I didn’t stop playing with her incredibly sensitive pussy, so she was struggling to breathe around her mind-numbing pleasure.

She was completely helpless and knew it. And I knew that she loved every single moment of it, which was more than enough to make me happy. I continued violating her with my tongue for another five minutes (and three orgasms) before I finally decided I really needed to get going.

That said, I couldn’t leave without one last little dig. I slowly eased my tongue out with some pretty sexy slurping noises and let her lower legs go. They were shaking too much for her to stand on her own and probably would be for a while, so I kept hold of her upper legs and turned her to face me. “Now what have you learned, my tasty little morsel?” I asked.

Her eyes were bloodshot, tears were streaming down her face, and her hair was messier than usual. It looked like she was in no place to reply. In fact, all she could do was moan.

“That’s what I thought. You learned that your place is as my pet.” That actually made her very weakly grin. “And as my pet, I think a short post-coital cuddle is due.”

She did absolutely nothing to resist as I laid back onto the ground and placed her against my stomach. She sighed in delight at my pleasant warmth and just pressed her head against my belly, trying to recover. Having her fluid-soaked legs pressing into me was kinda nasty, but I’d live.

(“Sex is over.” You didn’t miss too much this time.)

Dash normally isn’t one for cuddling, but I had a feeling she would have a very difficult time moving after that. She laid against me and let my talons slowly pet her and occasionally play with her hair.

It was easy enough to keep her calm, so I let my mind wander, thinking about what Reginald just told me. He obviously wasn’t as heroic as I thought he was. There was probably also something in what he said about Celestia convincing him to betray his own people. That sounded a lot like blackmail to me, so I couldn’t help but wonder what she had on him.

He also said that the treaty resulted in the creation of the draconic code of honor. It’s possible that whatever blackmail material she had on him was something that broke said code of honor. I didn’t know exactly what all was in it, but I imagine there was probably a lot to it. Spike and I would definitely have to have it explained to us so we didn’t fuck it up while in Iceland.

I’d also have to find a way to get the truth about the treaty while I was there, because I knew Celestia wouldn’t tell me a single fucking thing unless I already knew enough about it. Most dragons couldn’t read, so I doubt I would be able to find any books about it while we were there. Reginald also seemed to think he was one of the oldest dragons still alive, so I didn’t think I’d find too terribly many first-hand accounts, either. Finding out what really happened might require talking to Pyrite, which probably wouldn’t be safe. It would be a last resort, though.

If the dragons wouldn’t let Spike leave after learning he was from one of the eggs given to Equestria, finding his parents could be impossible. I was hoping it wouldn’t come to that, but it was a very unfortunate reality. That was a choice he would have to make, though. I wasn’t going to keep the truth from him. He deserved to know everything.

If the mare who raised him did so to keep him in blissful captivity, he had every right to know. And he most definitely had every right to be angry and seek revenge. I really hope he would choose to take the high road, but I wouldn’t hold it against him if he didn’t.

Learning that your entire life is a lie seems like a very justifiable reason to get upset, after all.

I was interrupted from my musings by the groaning of a little pony on my belly. “That… that was… amazing,” she finally sighed. “I’ve never been… choked like that before!”

“Yeah, I imagine that would be a first for a lot of people. Getting choked by a very long dragon tongue that was also playing with your cooch is probably a pretty unique situation.”

“I meant choked in general, but… yeah.” She weakly kicked her lower legs and shivered. “I can’t believe you made me so sticky!”

“You know you loved it.”

“...Oh yeah. And your claws are so soft…” She splayed herself out and giggled. “And you’re so warm. You’re the best cuddler ever!”

“This best cuddler ever is gonna have to leave eventually, Dashie.”

“Psh, only if I let you!” I slowly reached a talon down lower and pressed it between her bottom legs. “B-but I might not fight much…” I pulled said talon back and went back to petting her. “Mmm…”

After a few seconds, a random thought came to me and I finally looked down at her. Sure enough, her mane was braided. Each color was done as its own strand, so she had a full rainbow braid going on. It was super cute and I wish I could take a picture, but I had a feeling she would try to undo it as soon as she realized.

So instead, I moved my hands lower and zoned out again, hoping Ava would do her freaky braiding thing to her tail as well. Waiting another fifteen minutes wouldn’t hurt too much, I figured.

I tried to think about something, but my mind kept blanking on me. I knew there was a lot I needed to consider, but I also knew that I needed a lot more information before I could come to any real conclusions. It was a really shitty conundrum and I found myself desperately wishing that more people would actually give me the full story instead of just tantalizing hints every now and then.

Fucking pricks.

Either way, it gave Dash more time to recover from our filthy antics. She wouldn’t have been able to walk or fly right after we finished, but I think she was finally up to being able to fly. At the very least, her wings were folded against her now, instead of being floppy and unresponsive.

Her tail was also braided the same way, which was a huge plus. How does no one ever notice this? Is having your hair braided that relaxing or can they just not feel Ava’s ghost touch?

Blaze chose not to reply. He presumably did not give one fuck about fashion.

Once I noticed that her tail was done, I very gently poked her back. “I need to go, Dash. I can’t keep them waiting in the Everfree forever.”

“Ugh, five more minutes,” she sighed, flapping just one of her wings.

“I’m afraid not. If you need me to fly you back, I can, but we need to get going.”

“You might need to get going, but I don’t,” she said. “I smell like… Well, like a mare that just got tongue-bucked by a dragon. I think I’ll spend a little while here, then fly home.”

“What, don’t want to show off your cute hair?” I asked with a smirk.

“My cute what?” She finally lifted a hoof up to her head and felt it. As soon as she realized, she shot off my belly with a gasp. “What did you do?!”

“I braided it, silly! Your tail, too.” Her eyes widened even more and she spun around in the air, trying to catch her tail. She finally got it and just wordlessly yelled. “It’s so adorable!” I said.

“It’s so girly!”

“Yep. And since you’re a good little filly who knows her place, you’re going to leave it just like that. Otherwise, I might not pay you a visit when I get back.”

She looked down at her tail, conflict clear on her face. Finally, she landed on my chest. “I’ll… make you a deal.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll… leave my hair like this. And… and I’ll braid it like this before I see you again. But I want… I want…” She trailed off, looking away and blushing.

“Come on, Dashie. Tell me what you want.” What you really really want.

She seemed even more conflicted before finally sighing and hanging her head. “I want a date,” she whispered.

“Oh. With me, or…?”

“Yes, with you!” she angrily replied, jerking her head back up to face mine. “I’ll braid my hair like a girly little filly if you’ll go on a date with me!”

You know, I can honestly say that I didn’t see this one coming. “I’m going to tell you upfront that I am not looking for a relationship, Dash. If we’re happy together, that’s awesome. But I will not try to lead you on and I won’t be going into this as anything more than a casual date. I will absolutely go on a date with you to give it a chance and see if we both like it, but only if you tell me right now that you understand that it probably won’t lead to anything serious.”

“I understand completely,” she said with a nod. “And I’m okay with that. Being with you is fun, Nav. You’re a good friend. You’re also a really cute mare… well, woman and I’m really attracted to you. My parents always told me that best friends make the best coltfriends, so I put two and two together and… well, here we are. Even if it doesn’t lead to anything, it’ll still be fun. That’s plenty enough for me!”

“Cool. Then think of something awesome for us to do while I’m gone. If you want to wear either vibrating panties or a hidden vibrator while we’re on said date, I promise to make it worth your while. If not, that’s also cool.”

That made her blush, of course. “I’ll… think about it,” she slowly said. “But you better really really make it worth it!”

“Oh, I will. Now hop off. I need to get back.” She finally took off, but only to dart in to my face and lightly kiss me. She pulled back with a blush before I could reciprocate and zoomed off further into the falls.

If I had time, I would totally chase her because I had a feeling it would be really cute and fun. Unfortunately, I had places to be. Also unfortunately, I was a giant dragon next to a very militant pony city and I was really lucky they hadn’t already sent guards. With both of those things in mind, I took off back toward the Everfree.

By the time I finally got back, the two of us had probably been gone for over an hour and a half. Twilight and Taya were poking over a few bodies while Gilda and Spike were roasting something on a bonfire. I landed on the other side of the clearing, trying not to fuck up the fire. As soon as I hit the dirt, Taya pranced over to hug one of my legs.

“What took you so long, mommy?” she asked.

“You know Dash,” I replied, walking over to Twilight with Taya clinging to my leg. “One race never satisfies her. She’s gotta be the best at everything.”

“She’ll learn one day,” Twilight said, though she didn’t look up. “Reginald went back in to do a few last minute preparations. He should be out in a minute or two.”

“Cool. Did I miss anything big?”

“A monster attacked,” Spike said. “As soon as Gilda landed with a string of small bodies, it shot out of the forest.”

“It seems to support your theory, at least,” Twilight said, finally looking up. “Gilda proved that she was a threat. The Everfree sent a monster here to try to deal with that threat. And now Gilda and Spike are… eating that monster.” She shivered slightly, though that seemed a little bit hypocritical to me. How could she find eating meat creepy when she was looking at a row of forest critter bodies that she was about to experiment on?

But whatever. I guess ponies are gonna pony.

Shortly after Spike and Gilda finished devouring whatever the hell they killed, Reginald came thumping back out of his cave. “So you finally returned,” he said. “Are you prepared to depart, Navarone?”

“Yep.”

“Excellent. Spike?”

“I was born ready!” Spike replied.

“Indeed you were, little one,” Reginald quietly replied. “Then back away, all of you. I am going to seal my cave.”

Taya was currently lying on my back, so I walked to the far side of the clearing, where everyone else was congregating. When we were all clear, Reginald moved a huge boulder in front of his huge cave and blew a huge blast of fire at it. The flames seared the rock and partially melted it into place, preventing anyone but a dragon from moving it, if they could even tell that it was there.

“You will need to carry Spike, Navarone,” he said. “You will also need a different name.”

“Will Tiamat work?” I asked.

He tilted his head slightly, thinking. “I suppose,” he finally said with a nod. “You shall be Tiamat, dragoness of the wastes. Let the others think that Spike is your son, but do not say for sure one way or another. Dragons do not like liars, but they do like craftiness. If you trick them into thinking he is your son, you will be fine later when they learn the truth. If you lie and say he is your son, you will lose their trust.”

“Cool. I’ll keep that in mind. Anything else I need to know?”

“Plenty. I shall inform you on the way. Shall we finally depart?”

“Just about.” I reached around and very gently pulled Taya off my back and set her on the ground. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, Taya. I’ll also be as safe as I can. Reginald is huge and he’ll be protecting me, so you don’t need to worry about a thing.”

“I know, mommy. I’ll miss you, though.”

“And I’ll miss you. But with luck, I’ll be back before you know it.”

“I know…” I wanted to lean down to kiss her, but I didn’t want her to smell my vagina breath, even if it was skittle-flavored. Instead, I booped her and looked around the clearing.

“Keep it real, Twiley. And watch out for Taya.”

“Of course, Nav.”

“Gilda, the ship’s probably not gonna be in town too much. You’re free to stay on it if you want or you can grab whatever you need and get a place in town or stay with Dash.”

“Already taken care of,” she said with a nod. “I’ll see you when you get back.”

“Now I am ready,” I said, looking back at Reginald.

“I’m… I’m not,” Spike quietly said. “Just… just a second, guys.” He slowly walked over to Twilight and whispered something to her. She softly smiled and they walked away from the group, to the far side of the clearing. They talked over there for a few minutes before hugging it out and walking back over. “I’m ready,” he said, sounding very certain.

“Then hop on my back so we can get this show on the road,” I said. He grinned and flew up to my neck, riding me. “How’s it feel to ride a dragoness five times your size,” I asked with a dirty grin.

“Don’t make me smack you with a tree,” Twilight said.

I think Spike wanted to reply, but Twilight kinda killed the mood. Instead, he just awkwardly cleared his throat.

Reginald shook his head with a smile on his face before taking off. Spike and I joined him in the air moments later and we all took off toward the ocean.

It was looking to be a very… enlightening adventure.