Setting the empty plate on her nightstand, Twilight flopped back against the pillows. “It’s official, Sunny...that is now my favorite dessert. It even tops the nine layer triple chocolate caramel cake that got served at the last family reunion.”

Sunset chuckled, “That’s a fancy sounding cake more than a tasty one. After about four layers it gets to be too much for a functional mouthful.”

“You have a point. It was a huge cake, wheeled out on a fancy serving cart by the chefs, and...well, Great Aunt Alabaster—she’s the one I yelled at—starts talking loudly, saying things about how some people ought to be careful with such a decadent dessert, citing this ridiculous adage about ‘a moment on the lips, lifetime on the hips,’ while giving these super nasty looks to some of the room...But then Great Uncle Stalwart, her brother, shut her up.” Twilight giggled.

Blue-green eyes studied her giggling companion for a moment, particularly the bit of chocolate frosting smudging her lower lip. “What’d he do?” the former unicorn asked curiously. “She doesn’t seem to be the kind easily silenced.”

The grin on Twilight’s face grew wicked. “He just looked over and said ‘Right...so none for you then.’”

The redhead laughed. “I’m sure that the old nag was just thrilled by that!”

Her girlfriend pulled a face that resembled Rainbow’s when Rarity talked about doing the athlete’s hair and nails. “It was something like this, if I remember right,” Twilight explained. “And she spent the next hour fuming in her chair like a toddler in time out.”

“Really?” Sunset shook her head. “Sun and stars, aristocrats really are the same no matter where you go. It reminds me of this one time, when the Ambassador from Yaaa—” She cut herself off abruptly, remembering where she was and who she was with. Horseapples, Shimmer! You can’t go talking about the time the Yakyakistani Ambassador offended Prince Highblood with the truth about his toupee! Think before you speak! “I mean...uh...”

Purple eyes were watching her, and the former unicorn found herself scrambling mentally for a way to recover the conversation, to take back what she had said, all while her internal monologue scolded her. She must have looked panicked, because Twilight finally took pity on her and slipped an arm around her in a hug. “Sunset...it’s okay. I told you before I wouldn’t pry, that I’d wait until you were ready to share. I know there’s things in your past that you either can’t tell me or aren’t ready to, and I accept that.”

The dark haired teen paused for a moment, considering something, before resting her head on Sunset’s shoulder. “You didn’t let slip anything I hadn’t already figured out, anyway. I put together a while ago that your previous guardian is a wealthy woman with a considerable measure of social and likely political influence in another country, that you grew up in a background not that different from some of my family.”

Sunset couldn’t decide whether laughter or dumbfounded silence was a more appropriate reaction. Laughter because Twilight was so close and yet so far from the truth...and the other...for much the same reason. “...what...what gave it away?” she settled on, needing to know if she had to keep closer watch over her behavior.

“Little things,” Twilight responded. “Things that you probably aren’t even aware you are doing. Like table manners and little courtesies—you brought my mother that basket of teas and coffees for Thanksgiving, remember? Or how you pull out my chair for me at dinner when we’re the first ones in the dining room...how you carry yourself in public...” Lavender fingers twined with amber ones in her lap. “It’s something that I’m familiar with because I was raised much the same way, learned the same kind of etiquette and proper manners that my extended family expects, on top of the ‘good social graces’ my parents encourage. To me...and to you...they’re automatic, ingrained.”

Blinking, Sunset thought back and realized there was a comfortable familiarity in the mannerisms of Twilight’s family that wasn’t the same with the rest of her friends—except maybe Rarity—even if they were human and not ponies like her. “I...never even noticed,” she admitted, her cheeks growing warm with embarrassment.

“That was the other part that gave it away. You never noticed, never commented or teased me for any of it.” A frown marred her features. “You wouldn’t believe the number of times at school people have called me stuck up, or arrogant, or accused me of acting like I’m better than they are, all because of how I talk or behave—but to me, I’m just being polite. And that’s a school filled with people born into wealthy upper class households.”

It hit her then, the urge to share something, anything, even if it was small. Sunset bit her lip, then said softly, “It was...a bit of a culture shock when I first got here. I ended up spending a lot of time watching people, watching how they acted and dressed and behaved, to figure out how to fit in, how to blend in a way that didn’t have too many questions asked by authorities.” She squeezed Twilight’s hand, feeling her emotions churn with each word. “...but even at my worst, when I was on the streets or ruling the school with an iron grip, I...I couldn’t escape who I used to be...before all of that: a spoiled brat who thought she was better than everyone around her and had the upbringing to back it up.”

The laugh that escaped her was humorless, bitter as her own words registered, and another thought crept to the fore. “I guess it’ll always be a part of me...which makes me wonder...have I really changed at all? Or is the monster I became still here, waiting to get out?”

A hand cupping her cheek brought her thoughts out of their spiral, turning her to look into purple eyes. “Sunny...you may have done bad things, but I don’t believe you were ever a truly evil person,” she murmured. “Even the night it all went sour for you, you saved a complete stranger from something awful, at risk to yourself, without a second thought. Someone who was rotten all the way through would not have done that.”

The red tinged memory of hurling a massive fiery sphere of death and magic at a figure wearing the same face that was looking at her with such trust, made her feel sick to her stomach. “I wish I could believe that, Sparky...but...I know otherwise. A few hours before that, and I may very well have left you to your fate, or worse, laughed about it.” All because the human girl shared a name and face with the brand new alicorn she had hated so deeply.

It almost made it worse when the trust in those eyes didn’t waver. “Do you know why that is, Sunset?” Twilight searched her face. “Do I...remind you of someone who hurt you...before?”

Sunset flinched, unable to keep looking at the other girl. Words stuck in her throat, and died, and all she could manage was a distressed whine.

Twilight drew her into another hug, tucking Sunset’s face in the crook of her neck. “It’s fine, Sunny. You don’t have to answer...and more than that, what you might have done but didn’t isn’t important. What matters is what you chose to do, what you did do. You chose to help me...and you chose to change, to do better, to not do the kinds of things you did before...and you’ve kept to that, even when things were awful for you.”

The former bully wrapped her arms around the smaller form hugging her, pressing her face more firmly into that spot on Twilight’s neck where she could smell her scent, where the whole rest of the world was blocked out by lavender skin and dark hair and she could just exist for a few minutes. Her ears keyed in on the soft voice talking to her, the way it made the skin under her lips and nose vibrate slightly, using it to steady herself. “I...I just don’t want to go back to that, Twilight. Not now. Not after knowing what it’s like to have friends, to have you, to have a fa—” Sunset broke off, shivering as the demon’s eyes from the nightmare surfaced from her memories. “The idea of going back to being...that...of losing everything I’ve worked so hard for...of hurting the people that have come to mean everything to me...” Her veins filled with icy dread at the mere thought.

“It terrifies me more than almost anything else.”

The room fell quiet for a few minutes, before Twilight asked, “Is that what your nightmare was about last night?”

Sunset shook her head. “...no...well...not exactly.”

Fingers scratched lightly at her scalp, a soothing action that pushed back the chill that had come over her. “Are you willing to tell me what happened in your nightmare?”

Sighing deeply, Sunset nodded into her girlfriend’s neck. “Yeah...I woke everyone up and I scared you...you deserve to know why.” The redhead took a few heartbeats to collect her thoughts. “I was....alone. The world was all wrong, dark and twisted and empty...and everyone was gone except for me...and the old me....”

Listening quietly, the dark haired girl never stopped the soothing motion of her fingers...it reminded her fleetingly of a few night terrors she’d gotten when she was a very small filly, horrible visions of burning heat and choking smoke that had triggered magic surges that threw things about in the bedroom that she had shared with the Princess. Celestia had always groomed her in the aftermath, humming her lullaby and trying to coax a terrified but exhausted Sunset back into dreamland. Twilight’s encouraging humming sound was a far cry from the song of her foalhood, but it gave her the courage to keep going.

“I had to find my friends, in the dream...but I found her instead, surrounded by signs that something awful had happened to them. I was...too late, and I don’t even know what got them, only that it was terrible and they were gone for good.” Sunset shivered and tightened her grip. “Then that...that...raging she-demon! She reminded me about you, and I...I had to get to you. To keep whatever had gotten everyone else from getting you too—I didn’t want to lose you.” Another ripple passed through her as she remembered the frantic run in the nightmare. “I ran as hard as I could, as fast as I could...but your house was already dark, the twisted things in the darkness crawling all over it....but I tried to find you anyways...”

Twilight stayed silent, but Sunset knew she had her full attention, letting the former unicorn get the words out in her own time. It helped her push down the way thinking about the Not-Twilight had made her feel. “I found you...but...”. Black eyes and cruel laughter flashed through her mind. “I...I wasn’t fast enough. Strong enough. You were begging me for help, but I couldn’t stop it...in the end, I was helpless and you suffered because of me.”

She could feel the arms around her tighten. “That would never happen,” Twilight told her with quiet certainty. “You would do everything in your power to help me if I needed you, and you wouldn’t stop trying until you found a way to succeed.” The younger girl pulled back so that she could meet Sunset’s eyes. “I know for a fact that in this hypothetical situation, you would never give up on me...that you would find some way of bringing me out the other side of anything horrible that could happen...and in that same form of hypothetical, I want you to know would never give up on you either, Sunset.”

The redhead dropped her gaze. “What if it still wasn’t enough? What if I still failed?” She could see not-Twilight, the way the whole of her had wavered and her Sparky had been there long enough to plead for help, to reach out to her. “What if you need me...and no matter what I do, it’s not enough?”

“Sunny...look at me?” Hesitant blue-green eyes pulled reluctantly away from the wall. Twilight let their foreheads rest together, and Sunset felt some of her tension ebb. “This is only a hypothetical, and nothing from your nightmare has happened. We are both safe, and you didn’t fail me. Nor will you, should anything happen in the future. I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that in any potential future events where I need you, that you will give everything you have and then some to succeed, because it’s who you are. In this case, you have nothing to fear, no matter what your inner demons might say to convince you otherwise...”

Kissing Sunset softly, Twilight continued, “Whenever you find yourself doubting that, I will be here to remind you, to quiet the negative things your own head tries to convince you of...just like you do for me.”

“Promise?” Sunset asked before she could stop herself, hating the way her voice trembled.

With their foreheads still touching, and her arms still wrapped tight around Sunset, the dark haired teen made a quiet sound. “Just like I’ve told you that I trust you, Sunset, I want you to know that you can always trust me even when you feel like you can’t trust yourself. That’s a promise, one I’m making to my very best friend.”

The warmth of Twilight’s lips sealing to hers spread from the point of contact all the way through the former unicorn and left behind the same tingling that she had always associated with good magic passing through her. It was heady and left her wanting more as much as it left her feeling comfortable and relaxed.

Evidently the other teen thought so too, because she tugged Sunset back down onto the pillows with her. “Cuddle with me for a bit? Like last night? I think we both need it again.

“I think I can manage that,” the redhead snarked, shifting Twilight into the position they both liked best, enfolding her girlfriend in her arms and even draping one leg over Twilight’s to keep her close and warm. The two of them exchanged light, affectionate kisses, allowing Sunset to finally get that smudge of chocolate off her companion’s lower lip with a playful flick of her tongue. “You had some chocolate there, Sparky,” she murmured teasingly.

The smaller girl made a face at her, eyes dropping briefly to Sunset’s mouth. “You were too neat an eater—I can’t enjoy you tasting like chocolate too.”

Sunset grinned, rubbing their noses together before rolling away slightly to be able to reach the plate on the desk. “We can’t have that, now can we?” A swipe of a finger snagged a little bit of leftover chocolate from the surface, and she smudged it on her own lips, giving Twilight a rakish grin. “There. How’s this?”

Purple eyes danced with humor. “Perfect,” came the response, and then Twilight was kissing her again, a kiss that was filled with chocolate and sweetness and more than a little silliness.

Coming up for air a minute later, Twilight giggled and fixed her glasses. “I think I’ve changed my mind,” she told Sunset with more than a hint of playfulness in her voice. “Chocolate coated Sunset is now my favorite dessert.”

It was a comment that made the redhead laugh—even as it stirred up some of the heat and desire that still smoldered in the back of her awareness. “Mmm...we might have to agree to disagree there, Sparky,” she murmured, the tip of her tongue flitting out to delicately lick away the tiniest smear of chocolate from the corner of Twilight’s mouth. “I think I’m a bigger fan of chocolate flavored nerd...” Sunset watched Twilight’s cheeks darken, and she nibbled on Twilight’s lower lip teasingly. “I like it enough that I was thinking about borrowing that bottle of chocolate syrup your mom keeps in the pantry so I can have seconds.”

Her girlfriend sucked in a sharp breath, the gasp echoing through the room. Purple eyes had gone wide behind her glasses, and Sunset could feel the way her heart had sped up. “Too much?” she asked Twilight hesitantly. The words had been meant with the same sense of play the other girl had used, but the reaction they’d garnered suggested that she might’ve gone a bit too far.

Twilight’s blush darkened even more, and she played with a lock of hair, clearly trying to find the words to respond. It was interrupted by the cheerful and repeated chirping of her phone going off on her nightstand, which caused the dark haired girl to look momentarily confused before it registered that it was her cellphone. She pulled away from Sunset’s embrace to retrieve the device. “Who could possibly be texting me,” she mumbled. “You’re here, and my family would just knock on my door...”

Swiping at the screen, Twilight went from confused to elated. “Oh!”

As she settled back close to Sunset’s body, the former unicorn craned her neck to look at the screen. “Star photography? You finally found something you wanted us to try and get ourselves to add to your collection?”

Shaking her head, her girlfriend turned the phone so it was a less awkward angle. “Nope! This is actually something a cousin of mine took. Long Shot is really into photography, it turns out, and I ended up having this long conversation with him about different camera lenses and techniques. When I told him about how I learned the techniques to do amateur astrophotography, he said he wanted to give it a shot. This is the end result for his first attempt!”

Sunset studied the picture—quite a pretty capture of a night sky not unlike the one she had seen out at the farm on New Years. “I think yours are better, but it’s not bad,” she offered. Most of her astronomy related experiences in the human world had been with Twilight over the last few months, and ponies...didn’t really have the technological gimmicks to do something like stellar photography. Illusion magic wasn’t a bad substitute, but the photographs were in a league of their own, one she was not in a place to judge objectively. “It sounds like your New Year’s Eve was even more eventful after we hung up than I thought...since it sounded like before you weren’t really on speaking terms with most of your relatives.”

“...when I talked to you...I wasn’t,” Twilight admitted. “For years, all I’d ever heard them talk about were things I didn’t care about, engaging in social behaviors I still don’t really understand or have any desire to learn. I...suppose you could say I was drawing conclusions from incomplete data, and the ones that...are different than I had believed didn’t realize that I...didn’t understand.” Her cheeks were flushed with a different kind of embarrassment now. “I know you are aware of my difficulties in social situations, but not everyone is as...” she paused trying to find the word she wanted.

“Perceptive?” Sunset offered, nuzzling her cheek into dark hair. “I like to think I’ve always been fairly capable of reading others, even back when I was awful. It’s easier to manipulate someone if you can figure out how they tick. Or...in the present example, have a good idea of what you’re feeling.”

“Perceptive is probably the best, non-esoteric term,” Twilight conceded. “Regardless, I was under a false assumption and generalization, but because of what happened with Silver Dollar—”

Blue-green eyes narrowed. “Wait. What happened with Silver Dollar? That’s the guy whose dad is like...your uncle’s business partner, right? The one you said made you uncomfortable in the hall?” Anger gnawed on the bars of the metaphorical cage she kept it in. “What did that two-bit, snake tongued, tail chaser do?”

Lavender fingers rubbed her arm. “It’s fine, Sunny. I’m okay.” The way purple eyes suddenly found her phone screen extremely interesting spoke volumes, and Sunset tightened the embrace, waiting for Twilight to put her thoughts in order. “After we hung up, I still needed a little time to collect myself. I was still too wound up to be able to be around people,” she began. “I went out on the balcony that runs the length of the backside of the house—it was cool and clear, and I could see the stars...”

Sunset listened, feeling anger rise in her as the story unfolded, anger at Silver Dollar for chatting up her Sparky, anger at herself for not being there, anger at Twilight’s relatives for letting a slimy, yeti kissing goat-licker anywhere near their house. “That rotten—”

A finger to her lips quieted her. “He was awful,” Twilight admitted. “...and when he got too close, too pushy...it...did remind me of what happened...but...” The smaller teen gave her a slight smile, not a happy one, but one that held a measure of satisfaction. “I didn’t freeze up, Sunny. I reacted, used what you’ve been showing me, and when he grabbed me—”

“He. Grabbed. You.” The flat delivery was the best Sunset could manage to contain the raw fury that surged through her. “I’ll break every bone in his hands,” she hissed. “I’ll geld him with a rusty spoon. I’ll—” Words failed, a red haze had descending on her, tinting the corners of her vision, feeding into her desire to find the scumbag who had dared place a hand on her Twilight.

“—nny? Sunset!” Twilight’s insistent voice and the feeling of a palm pressing to her neck jolted the former unicorn back to full awareness, cutting through the rage. Blue-green eyes found purple ones, even as the other teen stroked her fingers along Sunset’s jaw. “Sunny...I’m okay. See?” A kiss was pressed to her lips. “I won’t lie—it was a terrible experience, and when he grabbed my arm, I had flashes of...the boys from the park...but I didn’t freeze or have a panic attack. I reacted like you taught me, I stomped his foot and yelled, and got free from him. He let go and didn’t try anything else, especially after I...maybe told him exactly what I thought about him.”

Blowing air out her nostrils in an aggressive snort helped bleed off some of the anger Sunset was feeling, enough to focus on her girlfriend, to hear the rest of the story. She was still upset that someone had manhandled her Sparky, but at the same time, she felt a measure of vindication for her choice to give her the means to defend herself as well as a large amount of pride in Twilight Sparkle. “You gave it to him good, then?” she asked on the heels of another snort.

“Stomped his foot hard,” Twilight confirmed. “I think I might’ve broken a few toes. I don’t like the idea of hurting others, but I tried hard to make it clear I didn’t care for his approaching me and he failed to take the hint.”

Sunset kissed Twilight, using it to push the rest of her anger down until she could safely deal with it later. “I’m proud of you, Sparky. You did everything right, it sounds like.”

Twilight pressed her forehead to Sunset’s, drawing in a shaky breath. “I don’t advocate interpersonal violence, but he deserved it,” she said tightly. “He...he tried to insinuate that I should stargaze with him as some kind of lead in to a physical encounter. He barely even knows my name, and he tried to weasel his way into stargazing.” Her voice wavered, filled with upset and frustration enough that it made the redheaded teen grow concerned.

“Hey. Take a deep breath, Sparky, nice and slow. Then explain why that upsets you more than him getting grabby?” She stroked her fingers through dark hair.

Purple eyes were dark. “Because...because it’s special. Stargazing is... When I was little...my head was so loud, filled with too many thoughts, and lights and sounds were often too much for me...I couldn’t handle doing a lot of the activities that children enjoy with their families. But one night, I was too anxious to sleep, and the house just felt...too loud, so Dad took me in the backyard with his telescope. It was dark, and quiet, and the air didn’t feel like sandpaper on my skin...and he showed me the stars. Told me about them, their names, what constellation they were in, what kind of star they were, how far away, everything I could want to know. It became a thing we did, whenever I was stressed or upset, or when everything was too much.” Twilight hugged her again. “Sometimes Mom joined us, and she would tell me the myths behind the constellations, of gods and heroes and monsters.” She sniffled. “We did it less as I got older and started seeing Dr. Soft-Spoken, but...when I look at the stars, all my problems just...feel small, and small problems I can handle...especially when I look up and it’s a reminder that my parents love me and have always done their best to support me, even when I’m not the easiest person in the world to get along with.”

A soft smile crept across her face, "And in a way, despite the rest of what happened that night, it was stargazing that meant I met you....and the moments we have spent since then, looking at the stars together? All of that just reinforces for me that its something very special in my mind. Something I only share with someone I can trust, someone I can relax around. It started with my parents, but now? Now it’s something I can only imagine sharing with you, Sunny.”

The former unicorn nuzzled Twilight, unable to prevent the throaty approximation of a nicker from vibrating the air. “When I was out at Applejack’s farm for New Years, I could see the stars clearer than I have in the entire time I’ve lived here...and all I could think was that the view was missing the most important part: you. You weren’t there beside me to share it, and because of that...I couldn’t look at it for long. It...didn’t feel right. So....I think I understand what you mean.”

Twilight's face lit up, "Yes, that's exactly how I felt when I was on the balcony by myself—the sky was this gorgeous panorama of more stars most people ever see, yet still calming and familiar....but there was an emptiness beside me, where you should have been. It felt wrong to not be able to point out my observations to you, to enjoy the sights above us together...”

Then the lavender skinned girl took a deep breath, the content expression replaced by one that was filled with anger and disgust. “So for that...that...”

“Unmitigated spawn of an inbred goat and a centaur’s leavings?” she suggested, offering out the most vehement insult she’d ever heard come out of Raven Inkwell—the older mare had not had a high opinion the arrogant leader of the tribalist faction among the unicorn aristocracy, and that had been the one of her favorite labels for the young Duke Neighsay behind his back.

Her girlfriend blinked at her suggestion, but accepted it with a nod. “Yes. So for him to try and insinuate that he should be in your place...and behave like he was doing me a favor by offering?” Fingers flexed as if she wanted to ball her hand into a fist—instead, she gripped Sunset’s shirt. “I felt more violated by that intrusion than him grabbing me. It made me so furious I lost myself for a minute.” A shudder went through Twilight’s frame. “It’s...probably a good thing Glamour showed up and ran him off. I’m not sure what I would have done next with how angry I was.”

Sunset cuddled the smaller form close, humming softly as she did. “Anger...is something I’m very familiar with,” she murmured in one lavender ear. “Sometimes, I think I was probably born angry, and never stopped. It never goes away, and it’s always waiting for a reason to explode out of me like a raging wildfire. So believe me when I say I understand how it feels to be angry like that....but I also think you would have been okay.” Feeling Twilight go still against her, she pressed her face into dark hair. “You weren’t angry for no reason, and you weren’t blowing up at someone innocent. And in the end...you stopped. If your anger was...the kind you should be worried about...the kind that I have, you wouldn’t have stopped, or hesitated. You would have hit him until the sensation of hitting wasn’t satisfying anymore.” The echo of breaking bone and the sound of stone crashing into flesh reverberated through her mind.

Seeing the tension come over Twilight, Sunset shifted the topic gently. “I am glad your cousin helped you get rid of him though. Which is strange to say because last you mentioned her, you were complaining about her. What happened?”

The other girl flushed, tucking her face into Sunset’s neck. “And I feel really awful about a lot of what I said about her, not just to you, but to my mom. Glamour...may have overheard me, and even though she tried to tell me it was justified because of her actions, I know it wasn’t right. She got the same expression you do, when you talk about people bringing up the way you used to be as some kind of joke.

Sunset winced. “Oh...that’s...not great.”

Twilight nodded against her collarbone. “It’s not. She...she’s got a lot in common with you, Sunny—she got a wake up call to the fact that her behavior was hurting others around her, and now she’s trying to fix it, to change and be better, which has included her wanting to put things right with me...” Though her voice was muffled, Sunset could still detect the guilt in it. “And I know just how much it hurts you when your efforts get thrown back in your face, even if people aren’t trying to be cruel. Knowing I did that to her, especially when I’ve always known that nothing about Glamour Shot’s behavior was malicious...” Twilight sniffled. “I feel like a terrible person and a worse cousin. My parents taught me better than that, and I just...I ignored it...because she annoyed me.”

The former bully carefully tilted her girlfriend’s head up until she could see watery purple eyes. “Hey,” she said gently, giving her a crooked smile. “You are not a terrible person, Sparky. From everything you’re saying, she didn’t know how bad her actions made you feel, and you didn’t understand that her behavior was motivated by a genuine desire to help. Now though, it sounds like you both know how the other feels and have a better understanding of what is going on...which means you can both try to be better towards each other going forward, right?”

When Twilight nodded in affirmation, Sunset used her thumb to wipe away the tear that had made it halfway down a lavender cheek. “I know you, and the fact that you picked up on the parallels between her situation and mine means you will be hyper-conscious of what you say in the future. You won’t keep getting digs in by bringing it up, or use it as some petty way to get back at her for things she did in the past, even accidentally.”

Kissing her girlfriend on the nose, Sunset’s smile widened. “Take it from someone who has been seeking forgiveness from those I wronged—the fact that you apologized in turn and accepted hers? That meant more than she can ever tell you...because even though most people never think about it...even bullies have feelings, and they can get those feelings hurt.”

A comfortable silence fell between them as Twilight digested Sunset’s words—the redhead could tell, just by the expressions that flitted across her face that she was analyzing her own memories and emotions. At last the smaller teen sighed. “...you know, you’re getting good at this.”

“Good at what?” Sunset furrowed her brows in confusion.

Her girlfriend nibbled Sunset’s bottom lip. “Giving friendship advice.”

That garnered a laugh. “I am not—I just happen to have had a great teacher.” She flicked her gaze down, then back up. “Though none of my past teachers gave me quite the same...incentives...that you do.”

Cheeks flushing, Twilight tried and failed to give her a stern look. “Sunny!” The grin she was fighting ruined the scolding tone. “‘Incentives’ or not, you still had to be willing to put in the effort yourself. I didn’t make friends for you. You did that yourself. You reached out to others.”

“...not entirely. Some of them reached out to me.” She found herself making a face as she recalled her first conversation with Flash over the holidays. “Even when I had gone out of my way to avoid some of them.”

Twilight gave her a searching look, "Something you want to talk about?"

Sunset winced, trying to come up with a way to explain the situation in brief without it getting uncomfortably weird for both her and her girlfriend. “About a year ago, when I was running things at CHS, I had the brilliant idea that I needed a convenient boyfriend. Some of it was to stop the advances of boys in general—and the rumors that spring up when a pretty, popular girl constantly turns them down—and...well...all my research had shown me that a well liked, handsome boyfriend was part of the popular girl image that I was cultivating....so I picked Flash Sentry. Sweet, kind, friendly, part of his own band, popular and attractive, but a gentleman....”

A realization hit her, one that made her cringe. “...thinking about it now, I...would guess Shining when he was in high school was probably a lot like Flash is now. Which of course, makes what I did even worse. I hooked Flash into dating me, playing the picture perfect, popular girlfriend. We went to school events, dances, games...every one of them perfectly planned and executed to increase my reputation. Even kissing him was preplanned.”

Guilt and shame flared, and she couldn’t look at Twilight right then, so she closed her eyes. “Everything I did was a performance. In my eyes he was a disposable accessory...one I got rid of once he served the purpose I wanted...but he didn’t know it was fake until I ended at the end of summer.” Sunset swallowed, but pushed on, knowing she had to get it all out. “He ran into me outside the mall and my friend Rarity sort of...pushed us into a private conversation. I expected yelling, or at least some ugly name calling. It was definitely what I deserved, but Flash proved, once again, that he really is a good guy.”

“What happened?” Twilight asked in a soft voice.

“He forgave me—more than that, he apologized to me for not doing anything when I was dealing with people getting revenge on me. I broke his heart, Sparky, and he still made the effort to talk to me, to put all the ugliness behind us, so we could start again as friends. It...made me feel even more awful for what I did to him.”

Twilight was quiet at first, something that started to worry Sunset, who still had her eyes shut, unable to work up the courage to see what expression the other girl wore. When she started speaking it was almost a relief to hear that her tone remained neutral and fairly soft. “Sounds like he’s a good person, and is capable of seeing how much you’ve changed. He wants to give you a second chance, because you’ve worked hard to earn it.”

There was a pause, and Sunset felt warm fingers stroking her cheek. “And you have earned it, Sunny, even if you don’t want to believe it.”

The former unicorn leaned into the touch. “It's hard, when I look back at how cruel and spiteful and mean spirited I was.”

“Sunset? Answer me honestly: would it have made you feel better if he’d screamed and swore at you instead? Called you names and provided a detailed list of every wrong you’d ever done to him? Or maybe if he’d wished all kinds of ill upon you? Would that have been better?” Twilight let her palm cup Sunset’s cheek. “Or would that have only perpetuated an ugly, vicious cycle of hate and strife?”

Blue-green eyes finally opened to meet her girlfriend’s gaze, and she found herself remembering the lesson of Hearth’s Warming, specifically the way Princess Celestia had told the story in her foalhood. “‘Hate and fear only beget more of the same. Less work they take than stoking Friendship’s fire, but in the end, all they leave is an icy domain,’” she quoted.

“That’s a beautiful and eloquent way of putting it, Sunny. Is it a quote from something?”

She nodded, staring beyond Twilight into memory for a moment. “A story from when I was young...” she trailed off, giving her head a shake to clear it.

This time it was Twilight who tilted her head with a gentle touch, so their eyes met again. “It captures the concept quite poetically,” she murmured. “...but there’s one thing you seem to forget: it’s not just about forgiving others or being forgiven by others, Sunset. It’s about learning to forgive yourself too. You have to, or you’ll have just traded one negative emotion for another.”

Sunset had no reply to that—Twilight was right, echoing something several of the girls had already hinted at, and on some level, she had already known it herself. It was just hard to reconcile with the guilt and shame that ate at her still when her past actions were brought up. She still had a lot of apologizing to do, people to make amends with.

She gave a heavy sigh. “I know you’re right, Sparky, I do. I guess I just feel I still have so far to go to make up for every ugly thing I did to others....but I’ll try.” Her mind drifted back. “I suppose I’ve already made amends with almost all of the people I hurt the most....there weren’t many people I did worse to than Flash and the girls....” Except Princess Celestia, but that hurt was long standing, mutual, and complicated by her exile.

Still, the idea of one day...eventually...hopefully...clearing the air with her former mentor—mother, a traitorous corner of her mind whispered—was an appealing thought. Their last conversation had been so ugly, so hateful, so angry, with words being thrown that one or both of them didn’t truly mean, and the former unicorn longed to be able to apologize, and just once, even if the Princess of the Sun laughed in her face after, tell her that she loved her as the only mother she’d ever had or wanted. At the same time, she didn’t believe that any encounter between them would go quite so smoothly. The people she’d wronged here had nothing on the wounds left standing between her and Celestia, and she wasn’t sure the alicorn would react quite so positively to a mere apology.

Faintly, so fleeting she thought she might’ve imagined it, she thought she caught a faint snarky whisper cautioning her against borrowing trouble when she already had enough of her own to see to. Whether it had been Stupid Little Voice or not, the words rang true. Magic and magical powers in a nonmagical world was quite enough on her plate, and she didn’t need to add to it with some kind of over the top teen drama and a negative spiral fueled by misplaced negative emotions. They had just gotten through that with the Sirens and were still trying to clean up the aftermath. The last thing she and the girls needed was for her to get hung up on her ‘mommy issues.’

The kiss jolted her out of her musings, and she raised an eyebrow at the dark haired girl still curled up comfortably in her arms. “Not that I’m complaining, but what was that for?”

“You got lost inside your thoughts, so I figured I’d try your technique. Turns out it works on you just as much as it does on me.” Twilight smiled at her. “Care to share with the class, Miss Shimmer?” she asked in the playful tone that only Sunset got to hear.

Her own smirk curled the corners of her mouth up lazily. “Sure thing, Professor Nerd,” she responded, reaching up to tweak Twilight’s nose. “I was thinking about my friends, and how having them has made all kinds of changes in my life.”

“Good changes though, from everything I’ve seen,” her girlfriend pointed out. “You sound so happy when you tell me about your friends and your outings with them.”

Sinking more into the pillows, Sunset nodded. “I am happy, and I have such a great time with them, even when I don’t think I will, and they keep surprising me with little things I don’t expect. Like at the sleepover....we had this all out pillow war where we turned furniture into forts and almost took out some of the lamps in our efforts—I thought we’d get yelled at, but Granny Smith just yelled for us to clean up at the end. Or Rarity went and got a whole bunch of the food for our dinner from this farmer’s market, because she thought I might enjoy some of them instead of the cheap fare from the deli.”

Twilight propped herself up on one elbow. “I didn’t even know there was a farmer’s market around here.”

“I didn’t either,” Sunset replied, toying with a lock of dark hair. “I did get the flyer for it though, so maybe we can go one weekend, maybe get some stuff to surprise your mom. Rarity had a lot to say about the breads and fancy cheeses, and AJ said her family runs a handful of booths there, selling produce and cider and stuff.”

“So a pillow fight and a fancy DIY sandwich feast...and you told me about the fireworks and the s’mores, and they did all of this with the want to give you a good experience? Your friends sound so nice.”

“They are some of the best people I’ve ever met, and I’ve learned as much about friendship from them as I have from you. I can’t imagine not having them in my life.” Sunset reflected on the warmth and faint sense of magic that even just thinking about her friends made her feel.

Twilight gave her a bright smile. “And that’s wonderful, Sunny—I’m so glad you have friends like that, where everyone supports each other in their unique interests but still comes together to share things as a group.” Her smile turned wistful. “Sometimes I find myself a little jealous—I would love to have a group of friends like that in my life. I had some friends but...well...Lyra moved away and Moondancer is doing a year in Italy as an exchange student. All that is left besides me is Wallflower...and honestly, I feel really guilty but she is so quiet that I just...forget she even exists when I get into one of my projects. Besides, as good a group of friends as they were, they didn’t have that same balance of accepting my interests but knowing when to pull me out of my own headspace that you do, or that your friends seem to have with each other.”

The smile dropped into a thoughtful and somewhat pensive frown as Twilight kept talking. “I’ve known Moondancer since sixth grade,” she confided, “and the other two girls I met my freshman year...but in all that time, I don’t think Ive ever been as close with them as you are with your friends. We get along, and Moondancer even had a few sleepovers here over the years, but...we certainly never had a big group sleepover, and sometimes...”

“Sometimes what, Sparky?” Sunset ran her fingers lightly along Twilight’s shoulder.

Her voice got very quiet. “Sometimes I wonder if the only real reason they were my friends is because we didn’t fit in with everyone else at Crystal Prep. Half the time, I’m not sure if Wallflower is being sarcastic or if she doesn’t like me at all, but the alternatives at school are worse.”

Sunset observed the way that Twilight’s mood shifted with the topic. It wasn’t just her voice, or even her expression, but the way her whole body shifted whenever her school and the people there came up in conversation. For a moment, she considered asking if Twilight herself even liked the girls she was referring to as her friends, but as soon as the thought made itself known, the former unicorn squashed it. It wouldn’t help right now, and in a lot of ways, it sounded very much like something the old Sunset would have asked.

Instead, she settled for squeezing the dark haired girl tighter. “I...wish I could tell you that's not the case, but I can’t, Twilight, because I don’t know. I’ve never met them, and what I know about CPA members besides you...doesn't really endear your classmates to me.”

“I know, Sunset,” came the disheartened response. “I’m not asking you for any kind of clairvoyant insight or even a way to fix it. I’m just...wishing I had more friends that I connected with even half as much as I connect with you, that’s all...”

Guilt made her stomach twist—the redhead had every reason to believe that her Twilight would love forging friendships with the girls, and not just because they were already friends with a Twilight Sparkle. They would adore the nerdy girl for herself, and do everything they could to make her feel welcome. ...and yet...she was denying her girlfriend the chance at what could very well turn out to be some of the best friends Twilight could have, all for her own self centered reasons.

It was guilt that prodded her to speak. “...maybe...I don’t know...but maybe when we’re...more ready for people to know about us...I could introduce you to the girls? I have a feeling they’d like you a lot.” It wasn’t much, and she shamefully hoped that such a nebulous time would happen after she’d decided on what she wanted to do, what she really wanted with the girl she was curled up to...but at the same time, she wanted to see Twilight happy, and if that meant a little more pressure on her thought process? Well, it’s not like she wasn’t used to impossible deadlines, between the Battle of the Bands and her previous life as Celestia’s student.

Thankfully, Twilight seemed as nervous and uncertain about the suggestion as she was about going through with it anytime soon. She bit her lip, expression not exactly a frown—it was more pensive than anything—her fingers toying with Sunset’s shirt. “....maybe?” she responded, her voice squeaking slightly. “I mean...I would like to someday meet them..they clearly mean so much to you, Sunny, and that matters to me. It’s just that five people at once seems like a lot to get to meet and know, especially with all of them possessing such vibrant personalities and you know how I am with social situations, especially with strangers. I’d be so worried that I didn’t want to mess up with that many eyes on me that I’m afraid I wouldn’t be able to remember their names or even speak at all, and then what would they think of me? I’d be seen as some kind of spaz, a weirdo...and what if that damaged your friendships with them? I don’t want to put you in the middle and make you choose between me and your friends—that would be just awful for you and I don’t want to—”

“Twilight,” Sunset interrupted, before her girlfriend wound herself up again. Purple eyes met hers as Twilight stopped talking. The redhead kissed her lightly. “It’s fine. I didn’t mean right now—you can meet them when we’re both ready, and if you’d feel better meeting them one or two at a time, that’s fine too.”

She watched as her girlfriend gave a little shake of her head to clear it—one Sunset suspected was modeled after her own tendency to do so. “Yes...of course.” The words were slow, halting. “Later is...I can do later. Maybe...in the future, after I’ve worked up to telling Mom and Dad? Then I could meet your friends...as your girlfriend?”

In answer, she pressed their lips together again for a longer, more intense kiss. “I...think I’d like that...but not until we’re ready.”

Twilight kissed her back, and the world around them melted away as the two of them lost themselves in each other again. When they finally pulled apart to breathe, Twilight eyed Sunset shyly, cheeks flushed. Her fingers fiddled with one of the former unicorn’s shirt sleeves. “...so...were you serious earlier? ....About...about the chocolate syrup?”

The wicked smirk that crept over Sunset’s face was an answer all on its own.

A bit of a bigger chapter, and one full of things! :P Important talks of nightmares, of fears, of Sunset coming up with creative insults for Silver Dollar...Busy chapter, but a fun one!

And of course, more sweetness, because I haven't given you guys enough cavities yet, lol.

Incidentally, we're coming up on the two year mark of how long I've been posting this story. Which is super awesome, all things considered!