Cross the Rubicon: Choices
Chapter 184: Chapter One Hundred and Forty Four: Sweet Surrender
Previous Chapter Next Chapter
Twilight’s hands were wandering again, making Sunset grateful for the darkness as they traveled along the highway, back towards Canterlot. Those deft hands kept slipping their way up under her shirt to rove along her abdomen and sides, occasionally braving a little higher to brush against her breasts. She kept drawing them out from under her shirt, while trying to distract her girlfriend with kisses, but they kept making their way back. “Sparky,” she breathed against the other girl’s ear. “Your cousin and Wildsong are right here...can’t this wait until we get home and are alone in your room?”
That seemed to cool some of the fire in Twilight’s blood, hands returning to outside Sunset’s shirt. “I'm sorry...” she apologized, looking out the window.
“Hey...it's okay. We’ll be alone in a little bit. Besides, I don’t think it's just you.” Sunset nodded towards the front seat, where Wildsong kept having to remind Glamour Shot that she was trying to drive. “I don't know if you noticed, but after we stopped for gas, and they hit the restroom...your cousin came back with her shirt on inside out.”
Twilight’s eyes grew wide behind her glasses. “Nooo...” she whispered, squinting at the front seats. “Omigosh,” she squeaked. “It is...”
The backseat was soon filled with shared giggles, enough to make Wildsong glance in her mirror. “That better be from a bad joke. PG-13, remember? Clothes stay on.”
“We remember,” Sunset snickered, “but maybe you should remind Glamour to put her shirt back on right-side-out the next time you guys take a bathroom break.”
Glamour Shot made a strangled sound of mortification. “Tiger! You let me go out with my shirt like this?! Why didn't you say something?”
“Probably because she was busy noticing other things,” Twilight murmured in Sunset’s ear. That earned a snort from the former unicorn.
A few minutes later, Sunset was pulled away from kissing by Wildsong getting their attention. “What was that?” she asked, a little out of breath.
“Look...I know we were supposed to crash at Twilight’s place and head back to campus tomorrow, but...would you guys be offended if we dropped you off and headed back tonight?” Wildsong had lifted a hand off the gearshift to run her fingers through Glamour’s hair in an intimate caress. “We have a lot to talk about, to start with, and well…”
Sunset and Twilight looked at each other—even though Sunset was fairly certain her girlfriend could see very little—and they seemed to be on the same page. Twilight laced her fingers with Sunset’s, leaning into the redhead’s side. “We wouldn’t be offended at all,” Sunset answered diplomatically for both of them. “I can understand wanting to get back home to your own bed.”
“We’ll probably do that then...but we’ll have to do this again sometime,” Wildsong smiled. “I had a pretty good time today—what about the rest of you?”
Twilight rested her head on Sunset’s shoulder. “I couldn’t have planned a better day if I’d made a list,” she confessed. “Thank you, all of you, for that.”
The former unicorn nuzzled her face into her girlfriend’s dark hair. “It was a great day, wasn't it? I’d be up for doing it again sometime, maybe during summer? Maybe make a weekend of it?” She knew it was the right answer with how tightly Twilight was hugging her in response.
Glamour giggled from the front seat. “Oh that would be amazing! I’d love to spend more time getting to know you, Sunset! And if you were interested, I’d love the chance to do your hair! It's just so gorgeous, and that curl! Do you know how hard I have to work to get my hair to have that look?”
She snorted. “My friend Rarity says that a lot. I could be convinced, I guess.” Hair and makeup and the like were not really something she fixated on, but like with human fashion, it meant a lot to one of her friends. In the last six months she’d been learning to at least be a good sport and appreciate the results when Rarity got into one of her ‘inspirational’ fits. She could do the same thing to bond with the one cousin her girlfriend had managed to find common ground with.
“It's gonna have to wait until next time,” Wildsong interjected. “We’re here.” The car pulled into Twilight’s driveway.
They climbed out of the back seat, where Glamour intercepted Twilight with a tight hug. “…I’ll text you when we get back to the campus, Twi! And we’ll talk soon, okay? …Especially if Song and I decide to get that apartment that Uncle Stalwart suggested.” Releasing the dark haired girl, she swept Sunset up into an embrace next. “Get my number from Twilight and text me, Sunset! I’d love to be able to talk to you too!” Then, like a whirlwind—or some form of abrupt natural disaster that was over almost before you realized it had destroyed everything in a hundred miles—Glamour had let her go and was back in the car, waving vigorously out the window.
Sunset watched as the car backed out of the driveway and drove off, before scuffing her foot awkwardly. “…so…it’s not late yet…any ideas what you want to do tonight, since it's just us?” She set the bag of their day’s purchases down on the asphalt so she could drape an arm around Twilight in a hug.
Her girlfriend leaned into it. “…Movies maybe? Maybe we could order a pizza or get take out too?”
“You know, I did pick up that batch of old sci-fi movies we were talking about last month. They showed up at my place the other day in the mail. I could go get them and we could have a marathon of making fun of how bad they are. Throw popcorn at the screen and everything.” She nudged the bag at her feet with one boot. “I could use it as a chance to drop our shirts off too, so that’s out of sight of your parents and Shining.”
Twilight cuddled closer, pressing up against her side. “…Can…I go with you?” she asked, a strange note of longing in her voice. “…I…I’m not ready to be away from you yet.”
It didn’t take her more than a few seconds to process and consider the request, before she squeezed Twilight’s shoulders and let go. “Alright, nerd,” Sunset said with affection. “Let’s go then.” Scooping up the bag, she headed for the bike, retrieving their helmets and storing the goodies in the compartment. The smaller teen settled behind her on the seat quickly, helmet in place and arms snuggled tight around Sunset’s middle. The redhead glanced down, then over her shoulder. “You know, Sparky, if you’re going to interfere with my driving like that, at least buy me dinner first.”
Her girlfriend at least had the decency to look embarrassed as she lowered her hands to be around Sunset’s waist instead.
After reaching Sunset’s loft, the pair had decided to stay there for the night, and Sunset had ducked out to the pizzeria next door to get dinner. “Hey, I’m back. Two pizzas, one mushroom, one extra cheese, and I’ve got a bottle of soda here too.” Sunset nudged her front door shut with her hip, hearing it click. “Old man Asiago upsized the pizza, so I hope you’re hungry, Sparky. You figure out which movie we’re going to make fun of first?” Twilight took the soda from Sunset, and the redhead got a good look at what her girlfriend was wearing. Day clothes had been exchanged for one of her new t-shirts and a pair of sleep shorts that had been in the pile of things that Sunset had outgrown that winter. It showed off lean lavender skinned legs that had just a hint of muscle definition where the thighs disappeared into those shorts, and Sunset swallowed reflexively. “…New shirt looks cute on you,” she managed, tearing her eyes away from Twilight’s legs.
Twilight beamed at her. “You think so? I love it!” She set the soda on the coffee table, where she’d cleared space for the pizza boxes. “I figured I’d go ahead and get ready for bed, in case we fall asleep on the couch…again.” She wrinkled her nose. “We have a really bad track record of doing that here.”
Sunset laughed, reaching out to tweak her nose—it was just too adorable not to. “It's because the couch is comfy and we’re together, nerd. I’ll go change too—we have to match, right?” She nodded towards Twilight’s shirt.
That got a giggle from her girlfriend. “I’ll set up the movie and the food then.”
Twilight shifted, leaning back against Sunset, snuggling more into her arms. A horrible sci-fi film played out on the screen, one they had been laughing at for almost an hour. The pizza had been decimated and the soda bottle had been tossed in the trash, casualties of two hungry, thirsty teenagers. The body she was resting against was warm, and Twilight found herself acutely aware of her girlfriend in ways she’d never thought about before. Being held by Sunset had always felt good, and always made her feel safe, even in her worst moments of panic and fear, but she’d never realized how well they fit together…how Sunset’s soft curves and lean muscle combined in just the right fashion to mold perfectly to her own body, no matter how they were positioned. Even the way that amber skinned arms fit around her, holding her with her hands lightly brushing along her skin where her shirt had ridden up a few inches felt right, and she savored the not-quite-ticklish sensation of calloused fingertips against her stomach.
The fiery haired girl was also the reason the day had felt the way it did, she realized. Sunset had gone out of her way to make the day a good one, and every time Twilight’s anxiety and fear threatened to overwhelm her, Sunset had been right there, bringing her back down and letting her know she was okay, that she was safe, that she was with someone she could trust. That had given her the courage to try, to be herself in a way she never had before, to be open and expressive about parts of herself that she’d kept secret for years…and no one had said a word to her. She hadn’t been stared at, mocked, or treated like some kind of anomaly to be studied or avoided—she hadn’t felt like some kind of freakish outsider, too other to fit in properly.
That too, was Sunset’s doing. Even Twilight’s other friends—with the exception of Moondancer—had always struggled with some of the more extreme parts of Twilight, whether it was her tendency to go off on long, extended, highly informative tangents, or her bad habit of fixating on her project of the moment, or simply trying to keep up with a hyperactive intelligence that far exceeded most of those around her, and that always left the dark haired girl feeling a little awkward and out of place, and when one added her own difficulties with trying to wrap her mind around social cues and boundaries and how to properly interact with her peers, Twilight had always believed she wasn’t really meant to belong to any kind of social circle. And then she’d met Sunset Shimmer, and the redhead had shown those fallacies for what they were—false assumptions made on incomplete data. Sunset got her, understood her in ways that no one else had ever managed, and none of the things that made Twilight different ever seemed to phase her or even give her pause. Sunset took everything in stride, a smile on her face and arms always open to offer a hug and reassurance, and some days, Twilight would swear that Sunset knew what she was feeling before she did—and much to her joy, it went both ways. Sunset was the only person she’d ever met who she could read like an open book, whose words and feelings and body language all matched with what she had had to learn intellectually instead of through an instinctive knowing like most people were born with. With Sunset, Twilight Sparkle felt like she belonged, and even when other people were added to the mix, the presence of her girlfriend grounded her.
Her thoughts wandered, her brain supplying an intriguing hypothesis: Was today an example of what a future with Sunset would be like? Could every day be like this one? That was an answer she wanted to find out, and her mind began to follow those potential outcomes, paths of ‘what might be’ in increasingly painstaking detail, until she lost track of the outside world in favor of the one in her head, where she and Sunset were blissfully happy and together in a thousand imagined lifetimes.
She was brought back to reality by lips ghosting over her neck with little featherlight kisses that evoked shivers of delight. “You still awake, Sparky?” came the breathy voice in her ear a moment later. “Or did the movie just shatter your ability to function with its terrible pseudoscience that violates everything we know about physics?”
Twilight turned her head, sealing her lips to Sunset’s in response, unable to articulate the emotions and thoughts going through her head at that moment, but wanting…needing…to try anyway. It was probably the most aggressive kiss she’d ever given, willing Sunset to be able to read her emotions in that amazing way of hers, to know just how much Twilight was feeling for the redheaded girl in that very moment.
It didn’t take long before Sunset’s hold on her tightened and she pushed back into the kiss, taking control in the way that Twilight secretly loved. A little noise escaped her unintentionally, and she raised a hand up to tangle it in that wild mane, wanting to keep them like this as long as possible.
All too soon, they had to come up for air, and Sunset tucked her face into the crook of Twilight’s neck, panting heavily, but still placing little kisses along the skin.
“Sunny...” Twilight whispered, angling her head to give her girlfriend more access to her neck.
The kissing paused. “Yeah?” a breathless, husky voice asked against her skin.
Twisting in Sunset’s arms so she could look her in the eyes, Twilight smiled. “...I wanted to say thank you...today has been special and it means so much to me...but it was only special because of you.”
Sunset exhaled, resting her forehead against Twilight’s. “You deserved a good day, Twilight, one with no bad stuff, no stress...just you and me, being happy doing things together. I wanted to make sure you got that, and I’m glad I succeeded.” She teased Twilight’s lips with her own, barely brushing them together long enough for it to register before she had pulled back.
"You really did, Sunny," she murmured. "If I had to pick a single word to describe today, it would be ‘magical.’” She reached up, running lavender fingers through the forelock that always fell down across Sunset's face, "You are magical.."
Blue-green eyes grew wide and startled by the declaration, searching her face with some undefinable emotion in their rich depths. There was a vulnerability there that Sunset rarely showed, a glimpse at the soul inside that was capable of tremendous love, compassion, and empathy, but was still so very afraid of being hurt again. Twilight found herself tracing her fingers along Sunset’s hairline, then down her cheek to soothe her fears, her own smile feeling awkward and shy.
Drawing courage from the day and the feelings warming her, Twilight continued, her voice soft. "You wanted to know what I was thinking of before? It was us, Sunny, how amazing today was, how wonderful I felt, just how...free I felt. How much I want to feel like that again, with you. How much I want more magical days, spent with you. A-as many days as..." Twilight’s courage ran out, and she trailed off, not quite able to articulate the rest of the thought. Instead, she tilted her head up to press her forehead back to Sunset’s, letting the gesture speak for her.
Sunset’s breath caught in her lungs, her whole body frozen from one heartbeat to the next, time seeming to stand still. Emotions warred within her for supremacy, fear and trepidation against hope and happiness, as she tried to figure out exactly what Twilight meant, particularly since she was struggling to separate it from the aching want in her soul that had been growing steadily for months. She knew what she desperately wanted it to mean, what it would have meant, coming from another pony…but Twilight was human, and for all the similarities between their species and cultures, the differences were profound, and that was only compounded when navigating the frustrating subtleties and subtext of language.
Was her Sparky saying what she thought she was hearing? The subject of their intimacy and attachment was something they’d discussed before…but always in terms of their ‘friendship that had progressed to something more,’ and rarely about the ‘something more’ by itself…and Sunset had avoided ever voicing the depths of her own emotions on the subject. Was Twilight admitting to what it seemed like she was? That the feelings and affections between them that had grown out of their friendship meant as much to her as it had come to mean to Sunset? That it was more than just an exploration, more than just a ‘try and see where it goes’ experiment between two high schoolers to the dark haired girl?
Hope grew, a fragile little thing that she was almost more afraid of than anything else. After so long of warring with the question of that in her own heart, of realizing that what she was feeling was making her seriously consider a future with the human Twilight Sparkle, of how deep her own emotions ran…to hear the other girl give voice to everything she felt in such a way…it was both a thing of wonder and a source of a familiar fear.
That fear was an old friend as much as it was an enemy, a nagging form of trepidation and negativity that whispered to her that such things wouldn’t last. That as much as she…cared...for the lavender skinned girl, with emotions that surpassed any she had ever known, Twilight couldn’t possibly feel the same way. It tormented her with the knowledge that it couldn’t possibly mean the same thing to the human girl, that eventually, she would grow apart from Sunset and move on, in that way that seemed so common for humans, leaving behind a lost little unicorn in the wrong body and nowhere to call home, discarded by yet another being that she had hoped would love her.
Yet as she searched Twilight’s face, looking into those shining purple eyes, the fear lost ground. She could see in her girlfriend her own emotions reflected back, and that knowledge burned through her veins like cleansing sunlight, filling up even the darkest corners of her heart and soul with a brilliance beyond the dawn. This was happening, and it was tangible and real, and her eyes were wet with happy tears. Her hand found the back of that dark haired head, bringing the smaller form as close as possible, so she could seal their lips together in a blistering kiss that put every one before it to shame with its intensity.
Twilight went rigid for long enough that Sunset almost broke the kiss, but then the dark haired girl melted into her embrace, a whimper escaping her as the redhead plundered her mouth hungrily. Her hands found a resting place on Sunset’s chest, fingers curling into the shirt there while she tried to press herself even closer to the taller frame. When she finally allowed the kiss to stop, Twilight let out a protesting sound, nuzzling against Sunset’s neck. “….Sunny…” she whined. “…Do you have any idea how incredible you are?” She pressed soft kisses to the skin there. “…gorgeous…sexy…intense…all passion and charisma and fire…you’re everything I’ve ever wanted in a girlfriend…and you could have anyone at all…but you’re here…with me and kissing me like this and holding me like that…”
A tingle ran up Sunset’s spine, half emotional response, half magic that she pushed back down in order to respond to her girlfriend. “…Sparky…” she murmured, tipping Twilight’s face so she could lock eyes with her. “…I don’t want anyone else…” she confessed, her voice so thick with emotion it threatened to get stuck in her throat. As it was, it sounded odd to her own ears. “No one else has ever, in my entire life, made me feel the way you do, made me want them like I want you…I’ve never needed anyone like I need you.” She stroked over a lavender cheek with her fingertips. “…it's only ever been you…and I never want it to be anyone else…”
The words…they felt so good to say it almost hurt, making her heart race with anticipation and her lungs struggle to bring in enough air. Fire burned in her core, that aching heat and simmering desire she’d been struggling to contain for months, reminding her that the words she had uttered had layers of meaning and the time to make her choice was fast coming due.
They also had a noticeable effect on the girl cuddled up against her. A slight shiver ran over her skin, and Twilight’s hand slid down Sunset’s front to the bottom of her shirt, fingers slipping just underneath the edge to brush over amber skin. Purple eyes stared from behind lenses, large and with a hint of what Sunset fervently hoped were happy tears at the corners. “…Sunny…” she whispered, voice almost pleading. “…Please…I need to hold you…feel you against me…” Those fingers traveled higher on her skin, pushing her shirt up and bunching it under her breasts, palms pressing to the smooth skin of Sunset’s stomach and making the former unicorn’s innards squirm pleasantly. “…Please?” her girlfriend asked again, pecking her lips with several soft, short kisses.
Sunset let out a shaking breath, taking Twilight’s hands away from her body in a firm grip. The other girl whined in disappointment—at least until Sunset let go of her hands so she could peel her own shirt off, then divest her nerd of her own top, leaving them both bare from the waist up. Lavender arms snaked around her in a tight hug, pressing their bodies back together with the delightful sensation of skin on skin. Twilight nuzzled into her, a happy smile on her face. Sunset tugged her girlfriend’s dark hair free of its ponytail, so she could run her fingers through it in an affectionate caress. “…This what you needed, Sparky?”
Twilight nodded, resting her cheek against Sunset’s collarbone. “…I can feel your heart,” she offered as an explanation. Her hands rubbed up and down Sunset’s back, the touch sending more warm tingles into the redhead’s center. Sunset kissed the top of Twilight’s head, burying her nose in her hair and inhaling deeply, nose filling with the well known scent, this time touched with a hint of sun and sea from their day. Contentment filled her, and she held Twilight close, closing her eyes to revel in the sense of being with the most important person in her life.
How long they lay there on the couch, Twilight couldn't say. She’d lost herself in Sunset’s words, in more fanciful imaginings of what the future might hold for them, in the soft breasts pressed against hers, in the steady heartbeat and clean, mild scent that she associated with her companion. The contact between them was intimate and tender, loving touch that was more about the emotions that had been aired than physical desire—not that that wasn’t very much present.
Twilight was not ignorant of her own body, nor was she oblivious to the way Sunset responded to her on a physical level. She was familiar with the heat that pooled low in her belly, and the delightful shock of pleasure when Sunset shifted position and she could feel their nipples rub against each other in passing in a way that made both of them gasp. She knew how her hands traversing up and down Sunset’s bare back made her girlfriend feel, and the way her own body reacted to being held was a welcome sensation that was part of her most erotic dreams. For all that part of their relationship developed slowly compared most of their peers, she never doubted that they were physically attracted to one another.
She felt Sunset shift again, and tilted her head up. “Everything okay, Sunny?”
The redhead smiled crookedly. “Not the most comfortable position for me,” she admitted sheepishly. “Its putting a weird pressure on my hip....but I...” A faint flush colored her cheeks. “This feels nice and I don't want to stop.”
“We could...move to the bed?” Twilight suggested. “It's bigger and more comfortable than the couch, and you won't be crammed back into the cushions like that.” She slid her arms free and sat up, trying not to feel self conscious about her state of undress—and to not stare too much at Sunset’s breasts, as much as she really wanted to ogle.
Sunset’s eyes wandered over her, but the motion of her fingers tweaking Twilight’s nose playfully put the dark haired girl at ease. “Good idea, but you have to let me up first.”
Scrambling to her feet, she picked up their discarded shirts, draping them over her arm. Sunset turned the tv off, then held out a hand for Twilight. Curling her fingers around it, Twilight let herself be pulled gently up the stairs to the bed, pausing only a moment to hang their shirts over the railing before sliding under the covers with her girlfriend.
The taller girl tugged her close once more, tucking her face into the crook of Twilight’s neck, nuzzling and kissing. Her hands were drawing random patterns on the small of Twilight’s back, making her squirm, half from pleasure and half from how it tickled a little. “Sunny!” she giggled. “That tickles!”
Lips murmured an apology close to her ear, and then Twilight’s laughter turned into a low moan when Sunset nibbled at the sensitive spot where neck and shoulder met. In the months since they had started dating, the redheaded teen had figured out all of the places on her neck that got the strongest reaction, and she wasn’t shy about evoking those responses whenever they had time alone like this. It felt so good, but it also drove her crazy, making her want to beg Sunset to keep going, to never stop touching her like that.
“....oooooh...” she panted, feeling one of her girlfriend’s hands wander to her stomach. “...Sunset...please...”
“‘Please’ what, Sparky?” came that husky voice in her ear.
Twilight whimpered when the fingers of that hand dragged fingernails carefully against her skin. “...That...” she managed. “...do more...like that...”
A warm, happy laugh, and Sunset was kissing her on the lips again. That hand on her stomach crept higher, until it rested between her breasts, calloused fingertips and short nails teasing over her skin. She could sense it more strongly now, the tinge of desire rising in both of them, but it wasn’t the frenzied fire that authors penned in romance novels, or the all consuming race to a climax seen in movies and television. This need was different than anything she had ever imagined in any of her fantasies or dreams, slower, deeper, and yet...somehow she knew it to be more powerful and intense than any solely sexual urge could ever be.
Her own hands, needing to find purchase on something, found their way to Sunset’s shoulders. It gave Twilight the leverage to deepen the kiss, a ripple of delight going through her at the playful taunt of Sunset’s tongue wrestling with hers. She had been wrong earlier when she thought watching bad sci-fi cuddled up on the couch had been the perfect end to the day. This was a much better way to end it.
The noises Twilight was making were addictive, and Sunset found herself wanting to hear more of them. She had returned her attention to her girlfriend’s neck some time ago, getting lost in the nibbling and kissing that was so integral to pony intimacy that for a while she forgot her ‘Special Somepony’ was in fact, a ‘Special SomeONE.’ It wasn't until she dipped lower to run her tongue over the hollow of Twilight’s throat and a hand tangled in her hair tightly that she remembered her companion was a human.
“Sparky?” she questioned. “Everything okay?”
Purple eyes opened, and their owner smiled at her dazedly. “...yeah...just...feels really good. Don’t stop?”
“Mmm, alright.” The former unicorn pressed a kiss to her girlfriend’s collarbone, completely unprepared for the way Twilight gasped and arched against her. A thrill went through her, the same kind she used to get when she learned a new spell, and she kissed the same spot again, this time scraping the edge of her teeth along lavender skin. Twilight made an incoherent sound and those fingers on her scalp tightened their grip.
Sunset smiled wickedly, an idea building in her mind. She started at Twilight’s throat and ran the tip of her tongue down the exposed skin until her head was level with her girlfriend’s breasts. Once there, the redhead started leaving featherlight kisses against her chest, listening to the way Twilight’s breath caught and feeling how her heart was pounding in her ribcage.
There was something about being the cause of those sounds that resonated with Sunset, filling her with a heady sort of euphoria....and so she decided to indulge. She remembered what Twilight had done to her a few weeks prior, and how Twilight had responded to just the touch of her hands. Those memories guided her actions in the here and now, her lips kissing a path across one breast, eyes flitting up frequently to watch Twilight for any sign of discomfort or distress.
Then, with a smirk still on her face, Sunset dropped a kiss on the perky nipple that was a few shades darker than the surrounding skin, pleased with the whimper that came from her companion. Another kiss, then a flick of her tongue to trace the sensitive flesh, filing away just what kind of cry each act coaxed out of Twilight. “Remember, Shimmer,” she reminded herself, “more sensitive and thin skinned than on a pony...” as she captured it between her teeth with a careful nibble.
Twilight bucked on the bed with a sharp cry. “Sunny!”
The former unicorn immediately let go, sliding back up in concern, resting a hand on Twilight’s cheek. “Hey, hey...did I hurt you?”
Her girlfriend shook her head vigorously. “...no, it didn't hurt,” she assured Sunset. “It felt...amazing...” She pecked Sunset on the lips, quiet for a minute before offering a more helpful response. “...if it's something you're comfortable with...I would be very okay with saying that you have my permission to use your mouth like that anywhere on me you want to...” The dark haired girl looked away nervously. “You know, add it to that list of ‘touches we’re okay with?’”
The former unicorn knew she was operating mostly blind now, delving like this into unfamiliar territory. Ponies and humans were different, not just from a biological standpoint. Popular media and culture portrayed human intimacy as having a focus on sex, and even the books that Cadence had loaned her had made it clear that a large part of most humans’ romantic intimacy tied back into sexual intimacy…or at least physical. And that was not even delving onto the way movies and media and literature portrayed sex as the entire reason humans engaged in intimacy at all.
It was a far cry from the pony way…where intimacy was an extension of deep, abiding emotional ties. Ponies saw most kinds of intimacy as simply one of the deepest demonstrations of those bonds, of trust and care. For Sunset, there were the physical desires, true, but so much more of it was wrapped up in behaviors and instincts which centered around wanting to make Twilight happy, make her feel loved and wanted and cared about. It was a way to express her deepest, most intense emotions without having to say them out loud, something that made her tremble when she glimpsed the depth of what she felt and shied away from a truth she still wasn’t quite ready for.
Coupled with the biological differences—many of which she still only understood in a clinical, textbook fashion—reading on a subject could only impart so much knowledge after all—and she found herself floundering.
Her hesitation lasted long enough that the hand in her hair relaxed and moved to rest against her cheek. “Sunny?” Twilight asked softly. “What’s wrong?”
Sunset leaned into the contact, exhaling slowly. “...I...don’t really have any idea what I’m doing,” she confessed, feeling her cheeks flush. “...This is...new territory for me, in so many ways...and I don’t want to mess it up. You’re too important to me, and—” Words failed her, and she had to look away from Twilight, staring off towards the wall.
Twilight was quiet, thoughtful for a minute or so before she responded. “...relationships like ours are not...often portrayed favorably, in terms of media and popular culture, and this extends to helpful guides and recommendations on engaging in physical intimacy,” she started, a hint of ‘Teacher Twilight’ coming to the fore. “...and...intimacy is a complex and complicated subject, where no two individuals are alike.” She stroked her thumb along Sunset’s cheek. “...in the end, it’s okay, Sunny, if you have to learn. I don’t want you to be perfect…I just want you to be you.” She paused, then added, “Everything else, we can figure out together. We’re both intellectually gifted, after all, and a lack of experience shouldn’t hinder us for very long.”
Oh. Oooh. For some reason, that caused a very strong reaction in the redhead, a wave of heat and want sweeping over her so powerfully that it took her a handful of heartbeats to remember how to breathe. “O-oh...o-okay...” she managed to get out, before that feeling urged her southward on Twilight’s body again.
This time, when she closed her lips and teeth on Twilight’s breast, she didn’t jerk away at the rising cries that filled the air. They actually served to spur her onward, giving her the courage to suck and nibble and play to a wonderful litany of sweet sounds, Twilight writhing against her on the bed until Sunset was forced to pin the smaller girl down. When she finally drew her head back with a wet pop, Twilight’s chest was heaving from exertion and the hand that had returned to Sunset’s hair trembled. “Still good?” Sunset asked, getting a shaky nod in return.
Using Twilight’s responses to her touch as a guide, Sunset worked her way lower, taking the opportunity to enjoy not only kissing Twilight’s stomach, but to playfully tickle her, sending the dark haired girl into a fit of laughter and leading to the two of them wrestling on the bed. Sunset came out the winner, sprawled out on Twilight’s legs, face nuzzled against her stomach. Her hand had fallen on Twilight’s knee during their tussle, and she bit her lip, letting her fingers trace along towards the outside of her girlfriend’s thigh, following the line of the lean muscles as they gave way to softer flesh the closer she got to the shorts Twilight was wearing.
She turned her face into the other girl’s skin, inhaling the mixture of scents that she automatically registered as ‘Twilight’, taking the moment to once more gain some control over the sharp pulse that went through her whole body as Twilight arched her hips up off the bed, pressing herself against Sunset with a whine. It proved harder to do than it had in months, and she struggled, her body crying out with how badly it craved that physical affirmation of the way her heart felt. Panting, she couldn’t stop herself from peppering Twilight’s stomach with kisses and love nibbles, a surge of pleasure jolting through her every time the smaller girl’s knee inadvertently pressed up against her groin.
Sunset could sense it, the way something in the air changed, something ineffable that had been building for days and weeks and perhaps even months shifting into something more, and she knew, in that same way she knew when her cutie mark was driving her to act, the same way she understood Twilight without the need for words, that they were approaching a point of no return. It should have terrified her, made her pull back, stop this before then, because there was still so much hanging unsaid, about herself and her origins, about magic and the monster she had become...but this time, none of that felt like it really mattered. What mattered was the feelings between them, the soft admissions spoken in the privacy of the loft, and her best friend who was so much more than that, laying pinned under her and looking up at her with absolute trust and open desire.
In that moment, something gave way inside her soul, and Sunset dropped a near reverent kiss on the quivering skin just below Twilight’s navel. “...Sparky...” she whispered, unable to say more, but putting her heart, her very being into that single word.
If Wildsong’s words in the café had opened her eyes to the possibility that Sunset Shimmer was in love with her, the look in blue-green eyes staring up at Twilight drove the fact home like the impact from an asteroid. Sunset had always treated her as someone special, and freely referred to Twilight as her best friend, but Twilight had never seen her eyes shine with so much emotion before. Her heart had been beating fast before, but now it was racing. Sunset loved her, was in love with her, even if she hadn’t yet said it aloud, and it nearly brought tears to Twilight’s eyes. The beautiful redheaded girl could have had anyone she wanted, but she had picked Twilight. “I’ve never needed anyone like I need you...” she had said earlier, “...it’s only ever been you…and I never want it to be anyone else…”
It had meant so much when Sunset had said it before, but it meant even more now that she had seen the other girl looking at her as if she were the only other person in the world. Her cheeks hurt from how much she was smiling, and she realized she could be happy if only she could spend the rest of her lifespan having Sunset look at her that way—even if everything else in her life crashed and burned, to be loved by the girl she loved in return would soothe the pain and anxiety of even the worst failures.
Twilight’s brain stuttered to a grinding halt when her own perceptions caught up to her train of thought. She analyzed it carefully, turning it over in her mind, comparing their relationship and her own emotions to what she knew of love and those who had happy, healthy relationships—notably her parents and Cadence and Shining—and with a sort of building, happy wonder, she realized she had meant the thought. She loved Sunset Shimmer.
Her gaze refocused on her girlfriend, who had moved down further, her hands running up and down the outside of Twilight’s thighs, her face nuzzling affectionately against the skin above her knee. “...Sunset...” she breathed, wanting to say something, knowing on some level just how much it would mean for the redhead to hear a declaration of love, “I lo—oooooh!”
The words were lost when Sunset’s mouth pressed a kiss and a nibbling bite to the inside of her thigh, a few inches higher than her knee. What came out instead was a long, low sound of pleasure that accompanied a hot bolt of lightning that traversed her nerve endings to the lust in her core that threatened to overwhelm her.
In her somewhat addled state of mind, she thought she saw Sunset smirk at her, before she repeated the gesture, just an inch or so higher. Twilight gasped and moaned again, her hips coming instinctively off the bed. And then she did something she could almost never do, something utterly alien to Twilight Sparkle: she stopped thinking, as her girlfriend’s mouth and hands led an assault on her thighs.
There was something heady and intoxicating about the way Twilight was responding to her touch, squirming and twisting while making a vast array of breathless sounds. It fed into that buried part of her that thrived on control and her ability to make someone do exactly what she wanted and how…there were no words to describe the rush that she felt now, from being in control, of being responsible for Twilight’s state of existence, the knowledge that she could read the other girl well enough to know what she had to do to wind Twilight up and push her to the brink, knowing that she use a kiss here or a nip there or a whispered word at the right time to get the reactions she wanted...but instead of using that part of herself for selfish reasons, she was turning it towards making her Sparky feel good.
Sunset found herself drunk on the feelings it triggered, ripples of pleasure going through her with each moan, each cry, each mewling, incoherent gasp, and she found own breath coming in harsh pants. She needed more. She hungered for more, to wring every last drop of ecstasy from Twilight until the other girl collapsed in a barely conscious heap—that thought brought with it burning in her blood and her bones, and it felt so good it almost hurt.
With a nickering sound burbling in her throat, she levered herself up long enough to roll Twilight over, giving her unfettered access to the back of those lavender thighs. Her lips and teeth found new skin to explore, her tongue following suit, slowly working higher, finding that oh so delectable spot where the lean muscle gave way to a softer bit of padding...only to find fabric barring her access to her partner’s flanks. She slid her hands higher, trying to push the fabric up and out of the way to no avail.
Frustrated, she nipped as high up as she could reach, before moving her fingers up to hook into the waistband of those shorts. She felt Twilight move, could see her twist to watch Sunset briefly, and then the dark haired girl lifted her body up, nodding to Sunset. Tugging, Sunset drew that fabric down and away, tossing it at the railing and missing. That didn't matter though, not with the smooth, rounded curve of Twilight’s hindquarters on display for her now. She nuzzled into the spot where a cutie mark would go, kissing and nipping the soft flesh, before using the tip of her tongue to draw in the six pointed star that her girlfriend was so fond of using onto her skin.
Time lost all meaning, as did anything but Twilight Sparkle and making her feel like the most important being in the whole universe. The air around her was filled with those beautiful sounds of her Sparky’s pleasure, and Sunset couldn't stop herself from making the low, throaty, nickering noises in response. Fisted hands curled around Twilight’s thighs, holding her where Sunset wanted, how she wanted, feeling the lean muscles flex under her touch.
The fire that had been smoldering in her for months flared into an inferno as she rolled Twilight back over, driven back to the soft skin of her inner thighs. She traced out Equestrian glyphs with her tongue in between heavy, whuffling breaths that made her companion shiver when the air traveled across her flesh. Every inch of flesh she marked sent a pleasurable tingle to her groin and without thinking she squeezed her thighs together to ease the tension there.
Her eyes slipped shut, cutting off vision so she could savor touch and scent and sound, her mouth moving progressively higher, hearing the cries take on a needy, pleading edge. She inhaled through her nose, nostrils filling with a scent unmistakably Twilight, but laden with something new, something enticing and undeniably female that made the former unicorn’s lips curl into a smile. Sunset switched to light, little kisses, moving at last from inner thighs to the place she knew Twilight wanted her badly.
The first of those kisses made Twilight’s body jump, then sigh happily as Sunset nuzzled her in affection. It was unfamiliar territory, and yet not. It was still her Sparky, and she had spent months learning to read her in ways no one else could. In a fashion not that dissimilar from the way she’d mapped the sensitive places on Twilight’s neck, Sunset made another sound in her throat, licking and nibbling and exploring this new area with a dexterous tongue, savoring the way that her girlfriend’s scent was translating into taste, memorizing not just the shape and texture and taste of every inch, but which spots coaxed the most response. Twilight gave her plenty of subconscious input: little gasps made it clear when she’d found a pleasure spot, whines that suggested the touch was too much on sensitive flesh, and breathless moans and whispered pleas for more were what she needed to drive her onward. Teasingly she ran her tongue over the entrance hidden within Twilight's folds, and when the other girl gave another long moan, hips flexing upward, Sunset responded by dipping her tongue within, and testing out her responses to the same exploratory touches inside, filing the knowledge away with everything else she knew about her girlfriend.
Sunset was burning up from the inside out—and it was intense and right in ways she couldn't explain. This was everything she wanted, everything didn't know she had needed, and it filled a hollow space in her soul she hadn't realized was there. Her face pressed closer to her companion, filling her senses with “Twilight,” drowning in how it felt, how it made her body throb and ache. Nothing in her life had ever felt made her feel like this, and the former unicorn never wanted it to end.
Eventually she drew her tongue upward in a slow trail, her mouth settling on the hooded bud that had caused such a strong response from Twilight in her exploration. She knew, in a dim sort of intellectual way, what it was and why Twilight reacted the way she did when Sunset tested running her tongue over it, but knowing something out of a book did not impart any practical knowledge on what to do with it. That left her once again, with experimentation, letting her girlfriend’s sounds and behavior serve as a guide. That yielded very quick results and she found herself brushing just the very tip of her tongue against Twilight—anymore and the reactions told her it was too much stimulation—making use of skills learned as a filly to be far more capable with her tongue than the average human.
As she traced the shape of the hood, Twilight cried out louder, her hips bucking again. At this point, she seemed entirely nonverbal, reduced to instinctive sounds of pleasure, her cry becoming mewling whimpers that seemed to beg for more. Sunset finished tracing an outline and on a whim, decided to start drawing Equestrian glyphs with her tongue like she had on Twilight’s thigh. At first it was just whatever symbols came to mind, random and teasing...but as she felt the heat in her own center rising, she switched to specific words... Twilight’s name, a few adjectives...
The fire inside her was paired with the growing sense of her magic, the soft warmth of power that manifested when she ponied up. Hesitating just a moment, she got an idea, one of those eureka moments that used to come to her at CSGU, though she wasn't sure it would work. Using what remained of her willpower, Sunset focused on her mouth and her emotions, doing everything she could to try and combine that with the tiny trickle of magic, as she spelled out the words she couldn't bring herself to say out loud, needing Twilight to understand how she felt.
She wasn’t sure it was doing anything at all at first, but she could feel that power pulse abruptly, and Twilight’s voice changed mid-moan. Lavender fingers tangled tightly in her hair and Twilight’s legs hooked around her, pulling her even closer, until Sunset could barely breathe. The lack of air didn’t make any difference, however, as she finished tracing the last few glyphs on her girlfriend’s flesh. Twilight’s whole body arched and thrashed on the bed, and Sunset pricked her ears forward to catch every last nuance and fluctuation in the wailing scream that filled the loft. And then nothing mattered at all as the pressure and heat and sensation that had been building inside her own nethers crashed into her, waves of pleasure like she’d never felt in either world wracking her body.
Somewhere in the midst of Twilight’s release and her own pleasure making her see stars, Sunset lost all connection with the real world. She wasn't Sunset anymore…She was flesh and blood and bone, but she was also fire and light, spirit and soul…she was the universe burning and fading to darkness only to be born anew from the ashes of the old, she was destruction and creation and healing…she was the endless hunger that never stopped in its Desire for more, even as she was the fulfillment and satiation that filled that nagging internal void…She was incomplete, she was whole, she was a multitude thrumming in Harmony, and for a moment that lasted an eternity, she was everywhere and everywhen at once, a heart beat shared by a billion billion souls and every star in the cosmos, before she crashed back into the organic shell of mortality and the knowledge was whisked away from her as it it had never been, leaving behind only the faintest sense of having glimpsed something important and profound and the darkness of her inner eyelids.
Sunset couldn't be sure how long it took her to come back to awareness, but given that Twilight was still panting for air, it couldn't have been that long. The former unicorn felt shaky as the full impact of what had happened finally registered, but strangely warm and content as well, settled in her human form in a way that she had never felt before. She placed a soft kiss to damp flesh, before slowly crawling her way back up Twilight’s body on trembling limbs. Collapsing on her pillow, Sunset curled her arms around Twilight in a hug, trying to process what she had just done.
On some level, she had known what she was doing...but now that she lay in her bed, holding Twilight’s form close to her own as they both came down from the high, she realized the full measure of her actions with crystal clarity... that they had crossed the final boundaries into physical, sexual intimacy...and by all rights, Sunset thought she would be upset or bothered—after all, she hadn't planned on it going that far. Yet, thinking about it, she found she wasn't even slightly distressed or even worried...the feelings, the words they'd shared and the way they’d clung to each other, even the way she had practically worshiped Twilight’s body with her mouth...it all felt...right. Like everything was exactly as it was supposed to be with the two of them in her bed, skin pressed to skin with the signs of intimacy and lovemaking marking them both.
Twilight twitched in her arms, managing to roll onto her side despite uncoordinated limbs. Purple eyes shining with emotion and still have glazed from pleasure, she kissed Sunset sweetly. “...Sunny...” she breathed, shifting to be as close as possible to the redhead. Sunset tightened her grip, nuzzling into sweat dampened dark hair, and felt Twilight pepper her jawline and neck with more kisses, in between contented little sighs. Lavender fingers stroked over her arms, her back, her shoulders, gentle touch that carried affection from one girl to the other.
Sunset luxuriated in the sensations she was experiencing, her mind absently trying to draw a parallel between how wonderfully and totally right this moment felt and any other moment in her life—in either world. After searching through her memory, she could find nothing that matched—the closest she could find came from a long ago and deeply treasured memory from a time when she had been young, before CSGU, before she’d realized that the white alicorn she idolized and adored was not the mother she saw her to be. She had been five, maybe a bit younger, still prone to those wild and uncontrollable magic surges that only the Princess could halt in their tracks, and in an effort to help her get a handle on her power—and some of her emotions, Sunset realized now—Celestia had spent several days coaching her through a very basic task that would give her some active control: controlling a feather with her telekinesis.
The former unicorn burrowed her face more fully into Twilight’s hair, a rueful expression on her lips. That had been a frustrating three days, filled with anger, tears, and more than one magic surge that incinerated the delicate feathers, until Celestia had supplied one of her own wing feathers which had the benefit of being immune to the fire that seemed to so often come with the turquoise colored aura. In that moment, when she was no longer trying to worry about so many things at once, Sunset had succeeded, taking the shimmering white feather from the golden aura with her own. She could remember prancing in place, ready to burst from joy that she had finally managed to do something other than start fires, and the look of pride on Celestia’s face had been worth the three whole days of misery. Especially when the Solar Princess had swept her up in those wings, held her tightly, and touched the tip of her horn to Sunset’s the way unicorn parents sometimes did. “I’m so proud of you, my little sun,” she told her then, words that only added to the euphoria of mingled magical auras and pure happiness.
That was the closest she could come to how she felt in the here and now, curled up with Twilight in the darkness of the midnight hours. Despite the lack of magic in her Sparky, and her own extremely limited powers—which seemed to do very little beyond threaten to surge at the worst times and make her pony-up with the other girls—there was a sense of something far greater than either of them, a kind of magic of its own, that filled her body and soul with pleasant heat and an inner peace she had never known.
Hands tugged her head down gently, bringing the redhead out of memories. Twilight kissed her lips again, murmuring something Sunset couldn't make out and then pressing their foreheads together. Sunset smiled. “Hey,” she breathed.
Her girlfriend giggled, the sound colored by sleep. “...that was...the best way...to end the day...” Twilight managed around both a yawn and a bit of returning shyness. “...thank you, Sunset...for making it everything I’d ever imagined and more.” She hesitated, biting her lip nervously. “Was...did you like it?”
Sunset brushed their lips together, a soft, brief touch. “I...I never imagined anything could be like tonight has been, Sparky...it wasn't planned, and I never thought it would turn out like this...” Another kiss, meant to reassure, and she continued. “...but for all that, nothing has ever felt so right.”
Twilight hesitated again, a faint blush staining her cheeks. "That's how I feel too." She took a breath, then continued, "Stay like this with me for the night?" Fingers caressed Sunset’s bare shoulders and down her back, and lean legs tangled with hers. “I want to...to feel you like this for as long as possible...I’m not ready for it to end just yet...”
“I think I can manage that,” the former unicorn murmured, sitting up just enough to retrieve the blankets to pull over them. “Come here...” Laying back down, she tugged Twilight back against her, shifting the smaller teen until they were in her favorite position for sleep. She tucked her face into her girlfriend’s neck, leaving a goodnight kiss on bare skin. “G’nite, Sparky.” Twilight whispered something back, but sleep had already stolen over Sunset’s awareness, meaning the words hung in the air unheard.