Everything was going according to plan for the returned alicorn of the night. She had escaped from her accursed prison in the moon, her sister had been removed from the picture, and the town of Ponyville had been made evidently aware of her presence. Word would spread, and soon all of Equestria would know that their rightful leader had taken her place. Gone were the days of Celestia, and even that bothersome students of hers was no concern for the ancient mare. A smirk crept onto Nightmare Moon's lips as she considered that latter point. Oh, she was sure this Twilight Sparkle would do her best to thwart her, as loyalty to Celestia was not something easily cast aside. But Nightmare did not feel even the tiniest bit of fear regarding her. After all, she was a mere youth. A unicorn, however talented, could not stand against one as powerful as her, and the mere notion of it caused a chuckle on her part. And it was right around here that she heard footsteps to her side as she stood at the edge of the Everfree Forest.

"Ah, Kevin."

She turned, casting a glance to the human beside her.

"It is Kevin, isn't it?"

The human let out a brief, but dry laugh in response.

"Er, yep, that's me, Ma'am."

Nightmare Moon again looked triumphantly to the forest's edge.

"This night is the start of a glorious reign, my friend. Soon, all of Equestria will bow to me."

Kevin nervously scratched the back of his head.

"Yeeeeeeeeeeah, wanted to talk to you about that. You know that one lavender unicorn that ran in here with a bunch of other mares?"

Nightmare looked to him with slight disdain.

"Please, do not refer to her as 'lavender unicorn', if you would. It is a rather predictable description."

Kevin shrugged.

"Hey, if it works, it works."

Nightmare rolled her eyes.

"What about her?"

Kevin pointed to the forest.

"See, I can't help but notice that you sort of...you know...just let her walk right in there for this big quest of hers. The quest that, I'd like to point out, you know is for the express purpose of beating you."

Nightmare waved him off.

"Oh, not to worry. I know she will try, but I have plans on how to deal with her."

Kevin chuckled, pretending to wipe sweat off his brow.

"Phew! For a moment there I was worried you were just gonna let her wander in there and find this ancient magical whatever that could totally defeat you!"

Nightmare joined in on the laughter.

"Ha! No, of course not! Instead, I shall torment her and these allies of hers as they attempt to do so!"

Here, the human paused, looking to his employer with some confusion as he twiddled his thumbs.

"Um...torment?"

Nightmare nodded.

"Indeed! First, I shall make the ground give way beneath their hooves! They shall face a fall most terrifying!"

Kevin blinked slowly.

"Er...not to put a damper on your plans, Boss, but two of those mares can fly!"

He paused.

"Also, if you can rend the earth like that, can't you just, I dunno, do something more? Maybe make a whole bunch of earthquakes? You know, really make sure the job's done?"

Nightmare seemed amused by the remark.

"Pah! Such a thing would be far too easy!"

"Er, yeah, it would be easy! That's why I'm saying you should do it!" Kevin pointed out.

But his master was undeterred.

"There is no need for such a thing, Kevin. When they see the fearsome dangers they are dealing with, they will turn tail and run!"

Kevin again scratched the back of his head.

"Yeeeeeeeeeeeah, I've kinda dealt with their types before, and a bit of a tumble by a cliff-edge isn't really gonna do it. I mean, if there's people who are willing to casually jump over literal bottomless pits, I'm willing to bet something like that won't be a bother to them. You got anything else in case they move on anyway?"

Nightmare smirked.

"Naturally. I shall set upon them fierce beasts! I shall tempt them with offers to divide their group. I mayhaps shall even make the trees themselves appear terrifying! Hoho, truly this will be a foreboding journey for them!"

As before, Kevin just stared at her, then rubbed his temples.

"So...all the powers you have, and you're just gonna beat around the bush and make them a bit scared? Why not just...you know...shoot them with your magical horn lasers and stuff? Maybe teleport them somewhere fatal? Like a volcano?"

He looked to the forest.

"Hell, since these Element things are so dangerous to you, why not just send them away?! You already know where they are, right?"

Nightmare looked to him with, of all things, pity, giving him a pat on the shoulder.

"Oh, my dear, deluded assistant. I appreciate your concern, but there is no need. Nightmare Moon shall emerge triumphant this night, and all shall be as we desire!"

Kevin nodded.

"Uh-huh, sure...or you could just let them slip past you to recover the one thing in all the world that can stop you! Which is what's happening right now! I mean, they're not too far away from here by now, you can just scoot on in and...you know..."

He put a finger to his throat, mimicking the motion of a slitting, to which Nightmare simply looked to him oddly.

"Tsk! Such a simple matter. Where's the sport in that?"

Kevin facepalmed himself.

"There's a time for sport, and this ain't it! Just zap yourself over there and do that whole lightning thing! Remember the lightning? You did it with those guards a few minutes ago?"

Slowly, Nightmare frowned.

"I could strike you with such power, should you decide to keep questioning my decisions like this."

She looked him square in the eye.

"So...is there anything else you'd like to comment on, human?"

Kevin halted, considering that.

"Well...there's that whole matter about how eternal night would kill off all plant life, which would end up killing everything else, thus leaving you with nothing but a barren wasteland for a kingdom..."

He looked to her, seeing the utterly enraged way she was looking at him, prompting him to clear his throat.

"But...I'm guessing that's not really something you wanna talk about right now, so...how about I just get some coffee?"

Smirking, Nightmare nodded firmly.

"Good lad, I haven't had a good cup in aeons. Oh, and make sure it's all black."

As Kevin walked away, he muttered under his breath.

"Huh, an actual threat against me...that's a new one."

The character of Kevin the Assistant is the creation of the YouTube Channel Dorkly. If you haven't seen any of their videos with him, know that they're hilarious