Author's Notes:

Simba's gonna talk shit like he's Sgt. R. Lee Ermey.

Two minutes later

Simba was getting the course ready with the help of Celestia, Luna, Cadence, and Discord, a minute earlier, they went back to the to the kitchen to eat and now they were getting ready for the training of the royal guards, Simba was waiting for the guards to show up including Shining Armor when he looked at the clock "Those idiots are late." Simba said as Cadence looked at him "Is that a problem?" Cadence asked and Simba looked at her dead in the eyes "Yes, I expected them to work rather than simply start slacking off and I don't tolerate slacking off, from now on they're gonna be waking up at 05:00 hours." Simba said as Cadence got a terrified look "What, 5:00 AM, doesn't that seem too early?" Cadence asked as she set up the obstacle course "No, the earliest is 04:00." Simba said as grabbed a water hose and turned it on in order to make the mud pit "What, how do these poor ponies get their sleep?" Cadence asked "When it's that time, the U.S. military doesn't tolerate slacking off nor does my chain of command and I'm not gonna go easy on your idiot husband." Simba said as he turned off the water hose "Simba?" Cadence said as the lion looked at her "Yeah?" Simba said as he sat on one of the benches "I don't ever want to wage war on the U.S. military." Cadence said as she trembled "You have to be a complete idiot if you ever declared war on the most powerful military and expect to win, you start a war, America ends it." Simba said "But we peacekeeper soldiers did hated one "military" branch." he said, this got Celestia's attention "Blackwatch." she said in a disgust tone "Yeah, I still remembered how many of those bastards I killed, it was so satisfying." Simba said as Celestia sat next to him and rubbed her hand on his cheek "I know how much you went through but you can start all over again as both my captain of the royal guard and my lover." she said as she kissed him on the lips.

Simba loves this mare, she was going so much as to help him as much as he help her, she reminded him of Nala which is why he loves her, Simba then said "You remember how we fought Blackwatch together" he said as Celestia nodded and giggled, she was always a thrill seeker, then Cadence asked "How are you able to slaughter a bunch of Blackwatch soldiers when you were in New York?" Simba then answered "Simple, I was giving better training than those pathetic baby killers and I know most of their toys and how they work like the back of my paw."Simba then notice that Luna and Discord made a bet, "So you two made a bet on whether I bed Celestia or not?" Simba said as he was giving his trademark smirk "Oh, big time, I knew that you, the son of Mufasa and Sarabi, would totally have sex with one of the princesses of Equestria." Discord said as he stroked his beard with his lion paw "And not to mention the fact of how amazing you were in bed last night, you were so sweet and caring." Celestia said as she nuzzled her lover, causing Simba to blush, then a raspy voice interrupted their nuzzling " Ugh, musshey stuff!" then Simba looked at the group "Who the fuck said that?" he said in a pissed off tone to which Discord pointed at the source, Simba then looked to said source and found the main 6 and Spike looking at him with Celestia.

"What?" Simba said and Twilight asked "Is it true that you had sex with the princess?" Simba looked at her and noticed that her mane was out of place, he pinched the bridge of his muzzle, it was just like if they make a big deal with something so mundane "So, what if I did, pencil neck?" he said, Twilight, Rainbow, and Applejack got really mad and Applejack said "This has gone too far, not only y'all talk trash to us but you also raped our princess as well?" this pissed Simba off "I didn't raped her!" he shouted "Likely story." Rainbow said as she and Applejack got ready to attack him but they were stopped as Celestia grabbed them with her telekinesis, she glared at the two pig headed brutes "Let's get two things straight, one, don't ever attack my lover again, and two, he didn't raped me, I was willing to make love with him because of how loving and caring he is to me." Celestia said in a pissed off tone.

The main 6 were shocked at what Celestia said, not only did she called Simba her lover but she willingly had sex with him "Is it true, princess?" Rarity asked as Simba hugs Celestia by the back "Yes, Rarity, it's true." Celestia said as she nuzzled Simba in the cheek "Thank you, Tia." he said in a soothing voice as she let Rainbow and Applejack go, turned around, and kissed Simba.

The six girls' jaws dropped at the site of Celestia making out with Simba while Spike was laughing at the girls' shocked faces until a group of royal guards entered the training camp, Simba and Celestia broke from their kiss and Simba looked at the guards to inspect them then he turned to Celestia and winked at her to which she giggled.

Simba walked towards the group of royal guards "attenhutt!" he shouted as the guards stand at the position of attention, Simba then inspected the guards and found out that Shining Armor was in the group giving out an arrogant grin, Simba then gave out a proud smile "Alright, boys, for standing like the way you should, no punishment PT." he said but then his proud look turned into a pissed off look "Which I would've said if bitch boy wasn't giving off that fucking disgusting arrogant grin!" he shouted as he walked towards where Shining Armor was standing and glared at the arrogant unicorn "What are you supposed to be doing when you're in the position of attention, bitch boy?!" Simba shouted which Shining Armor got pissed "My name is Shining Armor not bitch boy, get it right." Shining said only to get socked in the face by the red manned lion, both Cadence and Twilight cringed at the action"I asked you a fucking question and now you're talking shit like you've own the entire course?!" Simba shouted as Shining Armor recovered "It was my course but you took it away from me!" Shining Armor shouted only to receive an uppercut from the lion "Fucking wrong, bitch boy, Tia gave me this camp because she was sick and fucking tired of your and everybody's performance as guards because you only cared about a pathetic little fucking wedding!" Simba shouted "And I haven't seen any discipline on any of you fucktards, especially if you're fighting about who got the "best" dagger or about wanting to be first in line in the mess hall well guess what, this ain't fucking elementary school, this is a military corp! I'm Captain Simba Hasnuu, your new commanding officer, from now on, you'll speak only when you're spoken to and the first and last words out of your fucking mouths will be "sir" do you fuck heads understand that?" he said "Sir, yes, sir." the guards responded quietly "Bullshit, I can't hear you, sound off like you got a pair!" Simba shouted "Sir, yes, sir!" the guards responded loudly "Good, from now on, in my unit, you'll be waking up at 05:00 hours, and you will not slack off, do you maggots understand that?!" Simba shouted "Sir, yes, sir!" the group shouted as Simba walked towards a random guard and glared at the poor stallion.

"What's your name, dirtbag." Simba asked "Sir, Pvt. Beam, sir!" the stallion responded "Bullshit, from now on your name is Pvt. Snowball, do you like that name?" Simba asked "Sir, yes, sir!" the stallion now known as Pvt. Snowball responded "Well, there's one thing you won't like, Pvt. Snowball, they don't serve hay fries on the daily basis in my mess hall." Simba said "Sir, yes, sir!" Pvt. Snowball responded until Simba heard a voice that said "I've heard he banged the princess." and got suspicious "Who said that? Who the fuck said that?! Who's the little, piss drinking, trash eating, dick headed, dirty fuck down here who just signed their own death certificate?!" he shouted as he looked at the guards

"Nobody, huh, the fucking tooth fairy said it?! Or fucking Stanley, I'll PT you all until you fucking die!! I'll fucking PT you till your assholes can suck buttermilk!!" Simba shouted as he glared at a scrawny stallion "Was it you, you scrawny little fuck up?!" he shouted "Sir, no, Sir!" the scrawny stallion shouted "Sir, I said it, sir!" a voice said as Simba looked at the source and found a stallion "Well, look at that, Pvt. Joker the fucking clown here." Simba said as he punched the stallion now known as Pvt. Joker in the stomach "Let that be a lesson that if you speak without being spoken to, you will get fucking punished! You best unfuck yourself or I'll break your bones!" Simba shouted "Sir, yes, sir!" Pvt. Joker responded "Pvt. Joker why did you come to my beloved unit?!" Simba asked "Sir, to kill, sir!" Pvt. Joker answered "So, you're a killer? Now show me your war face!" Simba shouted as the stallion looked at him confusedly "You don't know what a war face is?!" Simba said "Sir, no, sir!" Pvt. Joker said, then Simba gave out the loudest lion roar that everyone had ever heard, the guards and group were scared shitless while Celestia popped a wingboner "Now that's a war face, now show me it, Private!" Simba shouted as Pvt. Joker screamed but Simba wasn't amused "I'm not impressed, work on the war face, Private!" Simba said "Sir, yes, sir!" Pvt. Joker screamed as Simba scanned the group "Now for this exercise, you fuck heads are gonna run this giant obstacle course and the recruits that complete it in the fastest time will enter the Equestrian special forces where you will be personality trained by me, now get your fucking asses into the course!" Simba shouted as the royal guards got to the exercise, Simba then crossed his muscular arms and watched the guards "Oh shit, this is gonna be fun." he said with a smirk.