I woke up to screaming, and shot up like a rocket, slamming into the ceiling....which shouldn't have been possible since it was about 15 feet higher than it needed to be. I fell back into the bed in a heap and looked up seeing Chrysalis looking shocked. "Lorenzo, is that you?" She had the pistol I had given her aimed at my chest.

This, despite the fact I could respawn, still alarmed me, it was never fun getting shot. "Jesus FUCK CHRYSALIS, Calm the fuck down! What the hell did you scream for!?" I all but screeched.

Chrysalis calmed down considerably after hearing my own voice and scanning me with her magic. “Alright…..so when we all went to sleep, you were normal, Moon woke up and almost had a panic attack so she woke me, while Rainshine had already left to do some shopping with Spring Dancer, and you…..your…..”

I tilted my head, an ear flopping to the side on instinct. “I’m what?” I asked, raising one of my eyebrows.

Chrysalis sighed and handed me the hand held mirror she kept around to touch up on her eyeliner or lipstick if she needed to do so, I looked into it and in shock dropped it. “WHAT THE FUCK!?” I stood up, in my boxers, and ran to the bathroom to look at myself in the body mirror I had installed. I was a FUCKING ALICORN, royal purple fur, same emerald green eyes I’ve always had, no beard or musache which made me sad, and my mane…..it seemed to be the same jetblack hair I always had. I unfurled the large fluffy wings on my back, instinct once more as I flared them in surprise, they had alternating patterns of purple and emerald green, making them sort of look like neon flames or something, oh god that looks weird.

I stepped out of the bathroom, tossing on some clothes. “Alright, I’m going to Canterlot, maybe Celestia knows what happened and can fix it, because I have no fuckin idea how this even went down, so I doubt my zebras or chemists would be able to fix this, she has lived thousands of years, she’s bound to know somethin.” I grabbed a few items as I tossed on my clothes, like my railgun and tossed it into my inventory.

Chrysalis nodded. “Alright, I’ll inform Moon, Rainshine, and Spring, maybe we’ll have a mare's day.” She chuckled at the thought.

I facepalmed. “You're in a herd, to the ruler of an Empire that has the ability to go to entirely other planets, you can do whatever the hell ya want to while I’m gone so long as you don’t break laws!” I relayed into my own carrier, and called Celestia. Within a matter of seconds I was connected to her on the phone. “Celestia, I have a situation, I’m on my way to show you what exactly happened, to see if you're able to help me, as I have no idea how, but I changed species overnight.”

Celestia’s voice came through the phone's speaker. “Okay, I’ll cancel day court, and await your arrival.” An artificial click signified the call had ended, and I looked over to the android who was going to be piloting my small carrier. “Move it! I want to be at Canterlot, YESTERDAY!” I commanded, and being the good machine it was, it nodded and we took off after I got into my seat. I signed pulling out a bottle of wine and pouring myself a glass, as well as pulling out a nice, small metal box, and opened it pulling out a fat cigar, held up my flip lighter and lit it, before taking a few puffs as well as drinking my wine to help calm my nerves.

It took longer than I’d expected to get to Canterlot, due to civilian air travel becoming more popular, so the android had to slow the craft down to avoid slamming through primitive airships like a railgun round through cardboard. The carrier...I really had to think of a better name for this thing, swung around and plopped itself onto a landing pad within short order, and I stepped out, the moment I did I knew I should have popped a stealthboy as every guardmare turned their head to look at me, ones with wings blushed and their wings flared out, while unicorns and earthponies simply stared, red as a tomato, for fucks sake. Within moments I had several guardmares trying to jump at me, as such, I dropped a tear gas grenade, and popped a stealthboy to hide as I slipped through the crowded room, and down the hall closer to the throne room.

After everything looked clear, I turned the stealthboy off, with more than half of the time left on it, I could reuse it if I needed to, just as I was turning around, I saw Luna, who promptly dragged me into her room.

--------------------------Crystal Empire-----------------------------

Johnny grinned. He was enjoying being a mechanic in his new home, these cars were so much more advanced yet so simple if you actually studied them a bit. Johnny was slightly chubby yet thick person, having ice blue eyes and a shaved head to simply prevent any from getting caught in the machinery of a car, with thin circle glasses you’d expect an 80 year old man to wear, and skin pale enough to become crispy after five minutes in the sun, thankfully that was easy to take care of with a potion. Johnny looked over from under the hood of the Atomic-8 Sedan as it was called. “Ay lassy, I found your problem right ere, one of these thick wires was shorted out, it’ll be rather simple to replace it, so the cost of repair will come to about 13 bits.”

The green crystal mare grinned. “Thanks darlin, I simply didn’t know why it would lose power faster than before, I’ll be giving you 25 bits, extra for bein so kind to an old mare like me.” She smiled at him, him being only slightly taller than her at 5’2.

Johnny nodded. “As ye say lassy.” He replaced the fried wire, it only took five minutes to do so, and once he was done, he got his pay, and waved the mare off as she hopped into her car and drove off, to wherever she was going, with a sigh, he plopped down into a chair and pulled out a Crystal Mountain Beer, and took a sip, he was going to enjoy this new gig. And later on after three pm, he couldn’t wait to meet his friend Damascus Plate at the bar for a drink and some grub, he was a minotaur, and quite friendly once ya got past how large he was compared to a normal sized person.

Checking the clock he saw it was only 1:45 PM, and thought ‘Oh fuck it, I can close early anyway I have no more appointments’ and close he did. Then he drove himself a mile down the road to his home to wait for his friend to get off work as well, and made himself a sandwich.

Alex looked up from her couch over to the door, and grinned. Opening it she was glad to see the pizzaling with her order, and took it, the ling had red eyes and wings for some reason, but from what she knew of MLP lore, changelings could change their chitin colors at will to anything they wanted, she paid, and he left, leaving her the extra meaty pizza she had ordered, the 2 liter of Classic Nuka Cola, and hot wings.

-------Canterlot castle-------------

Three hours later, I was fully dressed again...leaving a, satisfied Luna, on her bed, as I was walking out she asked. “Before you go, I’d like to know your name, now that I realise I never got it from you.”

I grinned inside my head, and gave her a grin that the Joker would be proud of. “Why Luna darling! Your words wound me so, did you really forget the last time we had fun together in my dreams? Those lovely blood curdling screams you let loose always delighted me! It’s Lorenzo honey.” Her face went from dark blue, to pale as snow, despite having fucking fur, and her eyes rolled into the back of her head as she blacked out.

And thus, I made my way to the throne room, and all but slammed the doors open to see a startled Celestia. “Alright! I’m here, this the damned problem I wanted to talk to you about.” I sighed.

Celestia just broke out laughing, much to my dismay.

Author's Notes:

Hey all! I've said it before, I have a discord server, join! jus remember to tell me who ya are from fimfiction if your discord name is different than here, and if ya don't have a discord? MAKE ONE already lol, get into the modern world and make a discord, lmfao
https://discord.gg/VEASwHZ
Hope ya enjoyed dis

OCO *mlem*