Wow, this has gotten rather more attention than I expected. I'll have to see if I can do something about that.

Also, thanks to my goof of not rereading, in order to rectify a continuity error that several people have pointed out, Rarity's human name has been retconned from 'Matthew' to "Mary".

"So you really were never on the moon?" Spike asked as he refilled Luna's cup. The booze had flowed freely amidst no less than nine cakes, and after the first few rounds and toasts the recently united humans had broken into smaller groups for more personal conversations.

"No, but I knew I couldn't show my face. Timeline preservation and all that. So I studied transformation magic and spent a few centuries travelling the world and having adventures under various pseudonyms." She gave him a wink. "You should check out the journeys of the adventurer Undaunted Moon. Some of my best work."

"Another fandom reference?" he smirked.

"Of course." She took a long pull from her drink, a dark stout from Minos, and released a small sound of satisfaction. "Mm. Delicious."

"Thanks." Spike took a quaff of his own. "It's a real pain to import, but it helps when you have connections all over the country."

Luna shook her head in tipsy disbelief. "I still find it hard to believe that's you're actually a changeling. Sorry, all of the changelings."

"You think pretending to be one pony is hard?" he laughed, "Try pretending to be a thousand at once, then we'll talk. But I guess that's what I get for ignoring the 'Do Not Touch' signs in that museum."

"Do you think you could... ah..." the alicorn swirled her drink as she stalled, but Spike caught her drift.

"Sure. It's no problem. What pony do you want to see?"

Luna blushed, turning her cheeks purple. "C-Chrysalis..."

Spike raised an eyebrow, but complied. One swirling vortex of green flame later and Luna found herself muzzle to muzzle with a black predatory grin.

"This what you wanted?" the Queen asked in her multi-tonal voice.

"Haahoooh... that's hot," Luna shuddered, a tingling sparkler travelling down her spine.

Spike-Chrysalis blinked and gave herself a once over. "Really? This?"

"Hey, you try living for a few hundred years and see if your tastes don't turn exotic." She reached a hoof out as though to touch, but stopped an inch short. "Could I...?"

"Yes, I already said you cou- oof!" the changeling gasped as the air was suddenly and forcefully crushed from her lungs by a bear hug.

"Mm, you're so smooth and cool," Luna purred as she practically nuzzled the chitinous chest.

"I'm... glad you like it?" Spike replied, his voice slipping back to 'young dragon mode' in surprise.

"No, stay in character. Be cold to me."

Collecting himself, Spike looked away and forced a blush as he spoke again in the queen's voice. "F-fine. Hug me if you want. It's not like I l-like the taste of your love or anything, fool."

"Ohoho yes. That, more of that."

Across the room, Twilight and Celestia watched the pair over a couple of glasses of red wine. "They certainly seem to be getting along well."

"Indeed." Celestia took another sip from her glass, savoring the flavor. "It's too bad Cadence isn't here. She's just as much of a shipper as you'd expect a fangirl turned Princess of Love to be. Though she was always a proponent of Chrysentry, but Lunalis was a close second."

"Cadence too? Why am I not surprised." Twilight was beyond disbelief. At this point it would be harder to convince her that one of her friends wasn't a human.

"Yes, her and your brother. They came over as a pair." She lit her horn and cast a small hologram-like illusion as she spoke. "From what she told me, they were on a date at Coney Island. Just before they were going to go home, they decided to ride a slightly sketchy-looking Tunnel of Love. They entered the tunnel as humans in Coney Island, New York... and came out the other side as ponies in Poney Island, Manehattan."

"As least they still had each other's company," Twilight mused, her mind still easily drifting back to those countless sleepless nights spent wrestling with the crushing thought of never seeing or talking to another human again.

"Though they weren't very good at hiding it," Celestia commented, "I had them figured out in two weeks. Shining Armour had never seen the show, you see, and one of their pet names was a Disney reference."

"Celes- Cassandra," Twilight corrected herself as she interrupted.

"Celestia's fine," she said with a wave, "Or even just Celly. I've been that a lot longer than I was Cassie."

"...Celestia," Twilight settled, not quite ready to cross that bridge of familiarity yet, "What do we do now?"

"Get another bottle?"

"No, I mean in general. The odds of all us being secretly humans must be astronomical."

"We are main characters," Celestia pointed out.

"True, but hear me out. If there are this many of us, who's to say there might not be more.

That gave the Princess pause. She set down her glass. "That is a sobering thought. To think that there could still be others out there, living like we were. Alone and pretending to be some pony that they're not just to avoid rocking the boat."

Twilight nodded. "I can even think of few offhand that might be humans."

"Really? Who?"

"Flim and Flam for one, and Vinyl Scratch for another."

"What makes you suspect them?"

Twilight sat up a little straighter as she instinctively shifted into lecture mode. "Their technology mostly. You've seen the show. Don't you think their Super Speedy Cider Squeezy seemed a little too advanced for this pseudo-medieval world? It was powered by magic, sure, but aside from the train every other form of transportation is pony-powered. They not only built a car, but built a whole automated factory within it. And Vinyl Scratch is along the same lines. She not only invented techno music, but also all the equipment needed to make it exist? You don't make the jump from Victrola records to digital turntables with amps and electric speakers in one move. And who invents a microphone when voice charms are a beginner level spell?"

"Those are very valid points." Celestia sighed and filled her glass again, to the brim. "Points which would rule out my main character theory. The brothers are minor villains, but Vinyl is a confirmed background pony. If we include them, then any pony might be a human. The gates are open, as it were."

"An if there are more humans out there," Twilight stressed, "We can't just leave them alone and isolated like we were. Even if it's just one or two, we need to reach out, find a way to help them. Something like a support group, if nothing else."

"I agree, but how would we find them? You and your friends are as close as can be, yet not one of you picked up on the others' vestiges of humanity."

Twilight stood and began to pace. Partially because she could feel the wine muddling her thoughts slightly, and partially because she always found the ticking staccato beat of hooves on crystal to be an excellent metronome to getting her thoughts in order. "We need... a question. Something that would be obvious to any human, but that no pony would be able to answer."

Celestia tracked her with her eyes as she found the safest route between bottles and cake. "You mean like who was George Washington? Something like that?"

Twilight shook her head. "No, we can't assume that they're from America. Applejack is apparently a native German, after all."

"Hm. Something that not only would every human know, but that also only humans would know? Sounds like a zen riddle."

Twilight continued her pacing as her thoughts turned inward, saving precious time by not saying them aloud. Something that only humans would know. History? It would vary by region and spotty education systems. Language? The same problem. The universal language of memes? A possibility, but one which too was hampered by their short shelf life and patchy recognizability.

As she still struggled to come up with an idea, she found herself distract by noise. Across the room, Rainbow Dash, Rarity and two changelings in Spike form were arguing over the lyrics to a drinking song. In this case, 'arguing' meant that each of them were trying to sing what they thought was the correct verse louder than the others were, as if mere volume would prove their point.

And then Twilight got an idea. Something so universal, so well-known, that no human could resist it.

The populace of Ponyville did not know why they had been gathered to the center of town. But two of the Princesses were there, as well as all the Elements of Harmony, so it had to be important. Plus, several of their neighbors had seemed oddly insistent in making sure that absolutely everypony turned up for the meeting.

"And so," Celestia concluded, wrapping up her unnecessarily verbose introduction where she'd thanked everyone for coming out, "In light of some recent revelations, we have a question to ask you all, citizens of Ponyville. A question which we hope you will answer honestly."

The princess cleared her throat, doubled-checked her voice amplification spell, and took a deep breath.

"Is this the real life?" she asked, "Is it just fantasy?"

"Caught in a landslide," Luna added, "No escape from reality."

"Open your eyes," Twilight pleaded, "Look up to the sky and see..."

Suddenly, a voice rang out from the crowds. "I'm just a poor boy," sang Thunderlane in his rich tenor, "I need no sympathy."

Then another voice joined in. "Becauthe ith's eathy come," it was the filly, Twist, "Eathy go."

"A little high," contributed Bon Bon.

"Little low," finished Lyra with a wide grin and not-so-subtle rump bump.

"ANY WAY THE WIND BLOWS, DOESN'T REALLY MATTER TO MEEE..." bellowed Bulk Biceps, "TO MEEEEEE...!"

By the time they'd gotten to Scaramouch, it seemed like the whole crowd was singing in chorus. Lightning flashed at the appropriate time as the crowd split into two groups for the call and response portion. But this was no Heartsong, no Moment of Harmony. No unseen instruments joined in their song save for a long guitar a stallion had already had with him. Everypony knew what to sing, not because the force of harmony whispered it in their ears, but because they already knew the lyrics.

In time, the song ended, as all songs must. Sweetie Belle beautifully soloed the final 'Anywhere the wind blows' and silence returned to the town square. Everyone certainly had some idea of what had just happened, but no one wanted to be the first to say anything just in case they were wrong.

"Right then," Luna declared as she stepped forward and took charge."Now that you all probably have some idea as to what's going on, will anybody who was not, in some way, shape, or form, previously a human being, please raise your hoof."

There was a pregnant pause as everypony waited, their eyes ever anxiously shifting to the ponies around them. One second. Two. Three. No hooves were going up.

Noticing Luna's jaw hanging uselessly, Twilight stepped up to the plate. "Alright, that's... more than we'd counted on. Okay, next question. Please raise your hoof if you are familiar with a television program called: My Little Pony. Specifically the rebooted Friendship is Magic version."

And suddenly there was a forest. Not all the hooves were raised but it was certainly no less than three quarters of the crowd. There was another momentary pause as everypony took acknowledged the sight... and then the mob descended into cacophonous chaos as the floodgates broke. Countless conversations flowed over top of each other like an avalanche of shock, surprise, and joyous relief.

"You're a human?"

"Yes! Well, I was."

"Me too!"

"You're not really Lotus?"

"No, my name is Charles, and I have no idea how to massage."

"Yeah, I could have told you that."

"I hate growing flowers! It's so boring!"

"Then why are you a flower vendor?"

"Cause look at me! I'm one of the flower trio! That's what they do."

"And I hate retail! In a world of magic and monsters, why am I still bagging produce?!"

"I'm so sorry. I know I've been pretending to be your husband, but I have no idea what your first name is."

"That's okay, I don;t know yours either."

"All of you were humans and you never told anyone?!"

"What would I say?"

"They'd think I was crazy."

"I thought it was a dream."

"A coma."

"A parallel timeline."

"An alternate dimension."

"So this isn't a holonovel?"

"And besides, I didn't want to break canon."

"...couldn't change the timeline."

"...didn't want to mess up the future."

"...ruin the show."

Some ponies, rather than react in mere surprise, had skipped ahead right to anger. The first was the piebald colt, Pipsqueak, who stepped forward and declared in a loud yet adorably squeaky voice, "I am a forty-five year old veteran and I demand a beer!"

He was quickly joined by a blue colt of similar age. "Yeah! And a release from the education system! I didn't go to college just to go back to elementary school!"

Elsewhere in the crowd, a maneless green stallion in a fine business suit with an questionable expression voiced his complaints as well. "You all knew! I've been a living, breathing meme for four years and you all knew and none of you said anything!"

"Stop making Dr. Who references at me!" Time Turner yelled at the group of ponies all trying to speak to him at once. "I know this character is a reference, but I never saw that show! Blast it, I'm a gym instructor, not the Doctor!"

"Quiet down, all of you!" Luna roared, easily overpowering the crowd into silence. "Yes, there are a lot of changes that are going to happen now. A lot of adjustment as ponies- no, people, stop playing a role and start living authentically. But we cannot give in to chaos. To do this we need to cooperate. So the important question is: what are we going to do now?"

"No Pinkie, we are not going to keep drinking." Pouting, the pink mare pushed back in the bottle she'd been pulling from her tail.

"Princess! Princess!" There was movement among the crowd which after a moment resolved itself into a pony pushing their way forward. After a long minute of struggling, she reached the front, falling on the ground as she did so.

"Yes, what is it?" Celestia addressed her. "Golden Harvest, isn't it?"

The mare nodded as she stood and dusted herself off. "Yes, though, I'd prefer Dennis now that everything's out in the open."

"Of course Dennis."

Dennis cleared her throat. "Princess, I know the pony I've been playing is a farmer, but really I'm an electrical engineer with over thirty years of practical experience in electronics manufacturing. If you give me a team and a budget, I think I can kick-start Equestria's Information age within five years."

"Done," Luna answered immediately."Come to Canterlot in a couple days and we'll get everything sorted."

As though the clouds had parted to reveal the sun, Celestia suddenly had a vision of the future as clear as day. Not a true prophetic vision, as she'd often faked to explain away her knowledge of future canon events, but a vision nonetheless. An idea of what could be done with the powerful union of human knowledge and Equestrian magic.

"Listen to me!" She yelled to gather the attention of those whose focus had begun to wander, "Our humanity may be gone, stripped away from us by force or chance, but that does not mean we are not still human. Each of us carries within ourselves a portion of humanity. Music and art, culture and technology! If we work together, if we combine the best of what made us human with the best of what we loved about ponies, then we can rebuild! If we can't return to our world, then we'll rebuild our world right here! Who's with me!"

The roaring cheer was deafening. Be they humans or ponies, everybody loves a powerful and dramatic speech.

Catching her sister's drift, Luna raised her voice so the crowd could hear her over their ongoing cheer. "If anyone else has a skill, talent, or life experience that they feel may be put to use in rebuilding a portion of our former human lives, please come to Canterlot in three days time to submit your proposals."

True to the nature of humans, they all ignored her instructions and began yelling out their ideas over top of one another.

"I was in Special Forces!" declared Mrs. Cake, "I can reform and modernize our military so we'll be prepared this time for that horrible event that happened in the final season!"

"Pencils!" another pony exclaimed, "I developed a spell that can convert raw wood and diamonds into pencils. Think about it! No more ink! No more quills! No more insufferable quill feathers that you can't pick off your tongue because you don't have fingers!"

"I know Python!" possibly the most unhelpful pony shouted, "If you make me a computer, then I can write some programs for... things!"

It was all too much. The crowd was on the fast track to evolving to a proper mob, and Celestia was just about to break out her Royal Canterlot Voice to shut the entire show down when she suddenly realized that there was a pony by her side. She had neither seen nor heard him arrive, and his deep crimson cloak did not look like it had just squeezed through a crowd. The cloak and its hood also served to effectively hide absolutely everything about his identity. Yet, even without speaking, he seemed to give off a foreboding aura that not just she, her sister, and the Elements could feel, but was strong enough to make even the closest edge of the crowd quiet down in apprehension.

"Princesses. Elements." His voice was as plain and featureless as a field of snow, giving nothing away, yet it seemed to easily cut through the noise of the crowd. "If I may speak with you. Privately."

The two primary princesses shared a look, one which passed the kind of meaning that could only be developed after many many years. Whatever their look had discussed, Luna apparently agreed with a quiet huff and a nod. In a flash of light, Celestia teleported all of them away, save Luna, leaving her sister behind to corral the enthusiastic crowd and, hopefully, convince them to return to some semblance of normal life, if only for the time being.

She would not be successful. There would be no going back to 'normal life'. Not after this.