This chapter is a soft edit with some grammar and spelling corrections. A final edit is pending review and will be uploaded when finalized. I apologize in advance for any errors that were not corrected.

Also, Big Mac, ya did good.

Kelly and Big Mac had their fun with each other as they finished the short trek back up to the barn. Big Mac was treating Kelly more like just a friend with only the occasional flirt or hint at his interest, but they were tasteful and never overstepped that boundary.

Kelly was doing much the same, though she was struggling to gain an edge since Big Mac was still playing off the idea that she was going after him. He didn't think of as a tactic to keep her close, though. It was more of him just doing his best to mirror the style of humor she seemed to share with her friends.

"Okay, okay, okay," Big Mac quietly pleaded through his laughs. "We're here, so play it cool and keep your hands to yerself. Don't want your friends getting the wrong idea, now."

"Hitting. Doesn't. Count!" Kelly grunted between punches into Big Mac's shoulder.

Big Mac was ready to concede such a point but had his attention redirected to Granny Smith staring angrily into the barn. She was tapping a dirty frying pan into her hoof rather menacingly.

"Granny, what are you doing here... with a frying pan?" Big Mac, asked.

"Macintosh, you watch your tone lessen you're fixin to get a clobbering like these apple thieves," Granny Smith snarled in her aging southern accent.

"Apple thieves? Oh, no, Granny," Big Mac feared the worst.

Big Mac trotted up into the barns wide-open doors to see Cerb and Lumberman sitting on the tailgate, thankfully unharmed.

Big Mac turned and stood between Granny and his new friends. "Granny, they aren't apple thieves."

The sound of footsteps finally padded up to Granny's ears. She turned to see Kelly walking up with her hands clasped together and held up to her chest.

"Gah! Another one!" Granny shouted, turning her attention to the young lady, the frying pan ready to strike. "You won't be walking away with any these apples-"

"Granny!" Big Mac shouted. "They're here to help harvest the apples, not steal them."

Lumberman sat upright on the tailgate. "For the hundredth time, lady. We brought Big Mac back home so we could help him gather apples. That's why we were unloading them in the barn and not trying to drive away with them."

Granny lowered the pan and turned back to the big red horse. "Macintosh, is that true?"

Big Mac groaned. "Yes, Granny. I said it was okay for them to help me gather the apples for our orders today."

Granny Smith tossed the pan down to the ground in a fit. "Dagnabbit, Big Macintosh! You know better than to hire help unless you ask me first. We can't afford to just-"

"We offered to help as a favor, mam. We're working for free," Cerb clarified.

Granny Smith's eyes opened up as far as the whites would allow, and Kelly swore she heard the iconic "Cha-Ching" sound effect emanate from this ponies very being.

"Helping for free? Well, why didn't ya say so?" Granny proclaimed in a much happier voice. "Why, we Apples could always use an extra set of hooves on the farm.

Granny Smith somehow managed to sneak her way over to the two on the tailgate and was already shaking Cerbs hand. Of course, upon shaking, she noticed all too late the incorrect anatomy. "Err, or whatever you fellers have."

"Hands, Granny," Big Mac informed her. "My new friends here have hands instead of hooves."

Granny lifted Cerbs hand and carefully examined it. "Hmm, well I can't imagine they'd be all too helpful with bucking trees."

"No, mam," Lumberman answered. "But we still managed to get the job done for the day."

Granny started to stumble over her own words. "Er-wel-y'all-what?"

"Eeyup," Big Mac answered with a proud smile. "Even got a start on tomorrows batch, too."

"Ya don't say?" Granny responded, slowly letting go of Cerb's hand. "Well, that's good to hear."

Big Mac erected his posture, standing tall and proud.

Granny cut his proud moment short with a quick jab to the chest with her hoof. "Cus' yer gonna need the rest of the day to clean up the whirlwind of a disaster you left in the kitchen!"

Her scolding continued. "Plus you still haven't finished setting up the rest of them fence post, like ya said ya would."

"Granny, I-" Big Mac attempted to defend himself, but Granny wouldn't have it.

"No excuses, mister!" Granny demanded. "Now I got half a mind to-"

"Granny Smith," Kelly interrupted the verbal thrashing. "Not to misjudge old Macintosh here, but in my experience, the kitchen is usually better suited to handle a ladies touch."

"Beg yer pardon, missy?" Granny inquired, shifting an uncertain glare.

Kelly smiled sweetly, hoping she wasn't overstepping her bounds with this family affair. "I'm just saying that perhaps Big Mac would be better suited heading out to finish up the fence post, and I could step in to take care of the mess he made."

"We can all help," Lumberman added from behind. "My friend Cerb and I would have no problem helping to set some fence post. And my friend Kelly there has a talent for cleaning up other peoples messes."

"A special talent for cleaning up messes?" Granny walked over to Kelly's side and examined her hips. "You wouldn't happen to have a cutie mark to prove that, would ya?"

Kelly looked down at her side where Granny had just examined, not processing the concept right away. "Oh, no. We don't have those. How about I just show you?"

Granny closed her eyes with a defiant look of disapproval. "I don't just let anypony into my kitchen. You see, we Apples-"

"Stop being so paranoid, Granny." Big Mac spoke up from behind. "I can vouch for Kelly. If I can trust her, you can trust her."

Granny turned and started to march towards Big Mac, looking like she was about to lay down the law as only a well-experienced parent would know how to. "Now hold up just one cotton-picking minute here, Macintosh."

"You know you can trust me," Big Mac stated bluntly before turning his head with a gotcha grin. "'Cus Granny didn't raise no fool now, did she?"

Granny stood stupefied. She wasn't about the question the quality of her own parenting to Big Mac in front of strangers. Too much Apple pride for that. "Awe, Crabapples. You better hope I raised your right, Big Mac. If she ain't the most kitchen-friendly pot and pan cleaner I ever seen, yer gonna be on dish duty 'til the Zap Apples lose their sparks."

Granny abruptly turned back and made her way to the house. "And you better finish up them fence post if you expect to eat tonight," Granny threatened as she exited the barn. "Come along missy. Let's just see how much Big Macintosh has learned from old Granny Smith."

Kelly wasn't looking forward to whatever disaster Big Mac had left behind. She locked eyes with the big red dolt and mouthed the words. "You owe me."

With the ladies departed, the men were left to tend to the fencing work.

"Sorry about that, guys," Big Mac apologized to Cerb and Lumberman. "She's a really nice pony when-"

"Eh, man. It's cool," Lumberman chimed in, sliding off the tailgate. "If a black guy showed up on my farm and was moving baskets of my fruit unannounced, I'd be angry too."

"Uh..." Big Mac seemed lost trying to make sense of that statement.

"Oh," Cerb blurted out. "-because she has a southern accent, right?"

Lumberman reached into the bed of the truck and grabbed another barrel of apples. "Hey, white folk is white folk. Even if they're a green horse," he joked.

"You're so full of shit, man," Cerb slipped out with a laugh.

"I don't get it," Big Mac complained. "Why would it be bad for a black human to be on a farm? And what's a white folk. And how is my Granny one? Is this another one of your human pranks?"

Lumberman sat the barrel of apples down on a stake with the others they had collected. "Nah, Mac Daddy. That's all gonna be over your head for a while."

Big Mac looked up towards the rafters in the barn. His eyes darted from side to side, searching for anything out of place. "I don't see anything over my head." He quickly lowered his eyes back down, cheerfully grinned at Lumberman. "Oh, I get it. You just wanted me to go looking for white folks, but white folks aren't real. Are they?"

"Well, no," Cerb correct him. "White folks are real. I'm one."

Big Mac couldn't tell if they were being serious or if this was part of another prank. "Oh... So can only green ponies be white folk, or can you turn into a green pony, too?"

Cerb lowered his head and chuckled. After a good laugh, he turned to Lumberman while pulling out another barrel of apples. "Okay, dude. We can't do race jokes in front of the ponies anymore."

"Apparently," sighed Lumberman.

"So is the prank over?" Big Mac asked, still unsure. "Do I have to get you back now?"

Lumberman grabbed another barrel. "No, man. It was stupid for me to bring it up. Only humans would get it."

"Because you're black?" Big Mac guessed.

"Yeah," Lumberman acknowledge. "Don't worry about it. Let's just worry about getting the work done, and we can worry about that later, aight?"

Cerb was carrying a stack of wooden fence post over his shoulder, dropping one along a path every few steps. Lumberman was digging another narrow hole in the same path in front of each new post to be set. Big Mac carefully raised a large wooden mallet overhead, somehow being able to hold with his hooves, though it was apparently a struggle for him.

With some impressive precision, he guided the mallet down on the post, sticking it further into the ground. The handle bounced loose of his grip, and he had to readjust before he raised the mallet again for another wack with it.

"Hey," Cerb called out on his was way back up to get more post. "Mind if I take a shot at it?" He motioned to the mallet.

Big Mac lifted up the heavy mallet. "Well, ugh. I guess if you wanna give it a try. You gotta be pretty strong to drive down the post."

Cerb gripped the mallets handle, getting an idea of its weight, which was lighter than he had expected. "It's not always how hard you can hit. Usually, it's how ya hit it, ya know."

"Giggity," Lumberman chimed in.

"Well, any pony can swing a-" Big Mac's words were cut off with a loud crack of the mallet landing on its target. He stared in amazement as to just how far the post went down with each blow from Cerb's swings. Not just how much more now he was able to drive down the post, but the speed he was able to pull back and reset for another swing.

With just a few more thuds, the post was down to its proper depth. Cerb relaxed the mallet in his hands. "See what I mean?"

"Eeyup," Big Mac admitted.

"Ya know, if you could get a better grip on this thing, you could swing just as fast and hard as I do," Cerb informed him. "If I set a few more of these post, could you grab some more for me and bring back some rope or leather straps if you got'em."

Big Mac didn't know what Cerb wanted either of those last two items for but didn't question it. Not if he was going to keep pounding the fence post like he was. "Uh, sure. I can do that. I'll be right back."

By the time Big Mac got back with another stack of fence posts, Cerb had already caught up to Lumberman who was digging the next hole.

Big Mac shifted the weight on his back and dumped the posts. "I think I got what you were asking for."

Big Mac reached behind his back and gripped a spindle of leather straps in his mouth and dropped it at Cerb's feet. "Are these okay?"

Cerb bent down and grabbed the straps. "Oh, yeah. Easy day."

Cerb grabbed the mallet again, standing it upright on its head. He wrapped the leather around the shaft enough times where he could get his whole hand around it. Then he brought both ends together and tied them in an elaborate fashion Big Mac hadn't seen before.

From his boot, Cerb pulled out a short fixed blade. Big Mac looked on with caution, not expecting him to be carrying a weapon. Cerb pulled up the strap, visually measured it for excess and made a cut. He brought the end of the strap back in and tied it into a loop.

Cerb put the knife back in his boot. "Gimme yer right hand-I mean, hoof. Sorry."

Big Mac did as requested, and let Cerb place the loop just above his hoof, tightening it just enough not to slip out.

Cerb let go of Big Mac's hoof and stood up. "Alright, twist the strap around a few times so it's tight and then try to swing it."

Big Mac started to see just what Cerb had done. He gave the straps three spins, making the leather strap nice and tight. By the time he stood up on his hind legs, Lumberman already had another post ready for him to pound in like before.

Big Mac raised the mallet and able to keep total control all the way up, and all the way down on its intended target. This time it didn't bounce out of his hooves or slip from his grip like it used to.

"Better?" Cerb asked.

"Much better," Big Mac answered, still impressed at the genius in its simplicity.

"Big Macintosh!" Applejacks voice shouted unexpectedly.

The thee trained their eyes to her voice.

"What in tarnation are you thinking?" Applejack scolded. "I come back here to get some supplies so that we can help Lumbermen and his friends, and what do I see? Kelly cleaning up your mess in the kitchen, all the apples you were supposed to gather were stacked by them, and now you here having Cerb and Lumbermen doing your fence work?"

"It's LumberMAN, with an A. Not an E," Lumberman corrected the angry apple horse. "And we asked to help. You know. Trying to be good neighbors. Isn't that the apple way, or something?"

Applejack had to take a second to think around not condoning her own ideology. "Well, yes, it is. But that's not the point. You just got here and shouldn't be building our fences and work'n the orchard like ya did."

"It's because he's black, isn't it?" Big Mac accused Applejack, trying to defend his friend. "You're just trying to keep the white folks working the fields, ain'tcha?"

What should have been a serious moment full of contention was ruined by Cerb doubling over with laughter. Lumberman wasn't laughing, though. He held his face in both hands and just sulked, the teeth of a bad joke coming back to bite him in the ass.

After a moment of nothing but Cerb laughing like a jackass, killing any conversation and leaving the two ponies baffled of what was so funny, Lumberman joined Big Mac by his side.

"Okay," Lumberman laid a hand on Big Mac's shoulder. "-Big Red, I like you, ma dude. Fo real. We're cool and all, but just don't bring up the black man defense again. Seriously. Full stop, right here. Do not engage."

Lumberman turned back quickly to see if Cerb had settled down at all. Which he hadn't. "And funny as it was for you to say to keep the white folks in the fields..." Lumberman had to take a moment to collect himself. "You got that shit completely wrong. It's pretty clear she meant both me and Cerb about not working the fields. And I mean, I'm not even gonna start on how backwards-"

Lumberman had to back away before making it more awkward than it already was. "I'll explain this all to you later. Okay."

"Right," Applejack answered, her words slow and sounding unsure. "Tell you boys what. How about you both go on ahead and take a break for a bit, while my brother here explains to me just what all's been going on since I left this morning."

Lumberman raised his hands and backed away. "Hey, that's fine. You both go ahead and do what you need to do."

Big Mac took one step forward but stopped as he felt the mallet dragging along with him. "Whoops. Forgot about that."

"Hey, I got ya, man," Lumberman said, coming to Big Mac's side.

Lumberman helped undo the strap and took ahold of the mallet. "Oh, here. You take it."

Lumberman took the loop from the strap and dropped it over one of the hames on Big Mac's horse collar.

Big Mac looked back to see it hanging off to his side. "Well, now. That seems mighty convenient."

"Ugh, Big Mac. Can we get ah walk'n?" Applejack asked, growing short with her brother.

The two siblings trotted back up in the direction of the house, leaving Cerb and Lumberman to take their break.

"Well," Lumberman said, turning back to Cerb. "-that was awkward."

Cerb started to lose the fight of holding back his laughter. "Trying to keep the white folks working the fields," He managed to spit out before falling back into his full gut filled laughter again.

Even Lumberman now had to laugh along. "God, damn it. We're gonna end up corrupting these poor bastards."

The two removed themselves from the fence line and found shelter in the shade of a nearby tree. It was a much-needed break from the warm air and beating rays of the sun. Cerb was already getting a sunburn on the back of his neck, or so it felt like.

"What are we really doing here, man?" Lumberman asked.

Cerb stayed on his back, watching the spots of sunlight dance in and out between the leaves as the gentle breeze moved through. "These apple horses have been good to us. They have status, connections, supplies, and access to resources we could never get on our own. If we keep good ties with them, that's going to ensure we have some security and protection out here. That, and they just seem like some good people to know."

Cerb took pause, reflecting on distant memories. "Mac actually reminds me of a marine I used to know. Corporal Thomas. A 3043, practically ran the whole supply platoon himself. Dude always found time to find out what all the infantry guys needed. Boots, phone cards, candy bars, or hot sauce. Whatever we needed, he had our back. Then his dad died. He went back for the funeral, came back a few weeks later, and separated."

Lumberman was quick to ask before Cerb went on any further. "Why'd he get out? Couldn't deal with the loss or something?"

"Nah, nothing like that," Cerb replied. "I mean, yeah, he was pretty broken up about it, but he came from some big ass farm. Cornfields and cattle. All that shit. But when his dad died, his mom and younger brothers and sisters couldn't keep up. Said they were gonna lose the farm if he didn't come home. And he did. He didn't even ask if he could stay in. Just asked what he had to sign to get out."

Lumberman shot him a questionable look. "They can let you out for shit like that?"

Cerb huffed. "You can get out for just about any reason so long as the CO approves it, really. There's some legal text out there that covers shit like in his situation, but I don't remember how it works. He was a good man, though. Good marine. Lucky fucker actually had a family worth keeping."

"Must be nice," Lumberman answered back. His words were honest and reflected the same tone of sorrow, and jealousy Cerb had.

"Found'em on Facebook a while back," Cerb added. "Married, kids of his own, now. Full-blown cowboy redneck."

"Ha," Lumberman laughed slightly. "Sounds like your kinda people. Corn fed and cowboy hats."

Cerb innocently laughed at the idea. "Ha, ha. Fuck you, dude. I look goofy enough without some stupid ass hat on my head. Besides, you know that I'm clearly the upper crust of white trash, not redneck. Hillrod, maybe."

Lumberman pulled out a clump of grass and tossed it in Cerb's face. "Awe, come on, man. You know that shit's interchangeable."

"Pft," Cerb muffled out. "Like you know white folk lifestyles. Kiss my ass," he joked.

"You'd think between you, Chris and Benny that I'd of learned something by now," Lumberman said playfully sarcastic.

Cerb brushed the grass off his chest. "At least Chris," Cerb offered. "I mean, he's no Thomas, but shit. Ya know."

Lumberman gave in. "I'll figure it out someday. I'll discover the secrets to your hidden cowboy life you don't want me to see."

A woman's scream came blasting from the house, making the two sit up straight. They listened for a moment, trying to assess what they just heard. A moment of absolute silence, save the gentle brushing of leaves overhead, was all they could hear.

"CERB!" Kelly's voice cut through the calm of the summer afternoon. Her scream was urgent. She needed help.

"What the fuck?" Lumberman asked, looking back up towards the house where Kelly and all the others were supposed to be.

"Get up! GO! GO! GO!" Cerb shouted, rising to his feet and pulling Lumberman up with him. They both raced towards the house.

"Do both the cinnamon and sugar go in this cupboard or just the cinnamon?" Kelly asked Granny Smith.

"Cinnamon up top, sugar down below." Granny directed.

Kelly put the last two items away and reached over to shut off the water to the sink. "This reminds me a lot of the times I would go over and help my friend Becky clean up her house. Her mother was probably the worst cook I ever met. I can't remember how many times I had to scrape charred macaroni from the bottom of a pot or petrified chunks of cheese from a casserole dish."

"That bad, huh?" Granny asked, finding some humor in the story.

"Oh, god, it was bad," Kelly added. "That lady couldn't take care of a household if her life depended on it. Luckily for Becky, she had friends like me and everyone else."

Granny pulled out a stool and sat down, resting her front hooves on the center table. "This friend of yours, Becky. She couldn't do the cooking or cleaning herself?"

Kelly dipped her hands in the warm soapy water, scrubbing the first set of dishes. "Sometimes, she could. Becky is the one I mentioned earlier that's sick. Some days are worse than others for her. And back then, when we were younger, she wasn't getting all the right meds and treatments to help her breathing to keep her on her feet. So, we all helped her out the best we could."

Granny could respect such a sentiment. "Well, that's mighty kind of y'alls to take care of a friend like that."

"Yep," Kelly gleefully replied. "Some of us cooked, some of us cleaned, Lumberman was their go-to handyman. Other times we would take turns driving her out to her medical appointments when her mother was too busy."

"She must have been a hard-working lady," Granny replied. "Being a mom isn't easy, ya know."

Kelly slowed down at that response. Her hand circled a dish with much less effort in the sink. "Yeah... something like that."

Granny could tell that was a response that was leaving something left unspoken. "Something like that, or something not like that, sweety?"

Kelly stopped washing the plate; the question had hit some unpleasant memories. "No. It wasn't like that." She picked up her pace and went back to washing.

"Becky's mom was terrible," Kelly spoke up more clearly. "She did everything she could to try and push Becky off to anyone else who could take her after she first got sick. Said she couldn't deal with the hardship of watching her baby girl suffer. Not that she could have noticed when she was blitzed out of her mind bouncing from one dead beat boyfriend to the next."

Granny felt terrible for asking, now. "I'm sorry, dear."

Kelly continued without letting another word in edgewise. "It's fine, Granny. When things got worse, Becky had us to take care of her. But then her mother found out that she could pull money from the state to take care of her. So suddenly watching her baby girl suffer became a badge of honor she wore for everyone to see. Of course, eventually doing the bare minimum was too much for her, and it started daily fights between her and Becky. Then her mom started calling us up, screaming why we weren't doing everything we could to help our friend. So, we eventually took over all the responsibilities of taking care of Becky, with the agreement that her mother never talk to us again."

"You can't be serious," Granny asked, rather shocked.

"Nope," Kelly answered, "She never won a Mother of the Year award, and no one ever had to ask why."

"Granny Smith!" Came Applejacks voice through an opening door. "Can you tell me why you allowed our new guest to-" Applejack again noticed Kelly was cleaning. "Ahem. Allowed our guest to do Big Mac's chores?"

"It's no problem, honestly," Kelly answered. "We were happy to help."

"Well, yes. I gathered that." Applejack sneered.

Granny motioned for Applejack to join her at the table. "Now, Applejack. From what I've heard so far, Kelly and her friends seem like some real tough cookies. And it's not like we couldn't use the help here on the farm."

A knock on the door interrupted the conversation.

Granny looked up towards the front door. "Big Mac, be a dear and see who that is, would ya?"

Big Mac turned and walked through the doorway, the mallet bumping up against the door frame.

"And don't be bringing any more tools in the house!" Granny hollered. She bitterly looked down into the table. "Crabapples," she mumbled before looking up to Applejack again. "Where was I? Oh, yes. Now when Big Mac first told me what all the going ons was, I said the same thing. But when-"

"Applejack," Big Mac intentionally interrupted. "I think this might be important."

Big Mac came back into the kitchen, three royal guards following in tow; Spearhead, and two Gary Stu looking guards. To Spearheads right stood a white Earth Pony holding a spear. To the left was a white unicorn with a sword and shield strapped to either side.

Applejack sat still, trying to figure out why the royal guards would be looking for her. "Uh, can I help you, fellas? We're kind of in the middle of something."

Spearhead stepped forward between the two guards that accompanied him. "Applejack. We have orders to escort you to the dwelling of the humans. Princess Celestia is to interrogate them in their connection to the wanted fugitive, Sunset Shimmer."

Kelly quietly put down the dishes back into the sink and started to dry her hands. She realized that a bad situation had found its way to the kitchen. One she shouldn't stick around for.

"Interrogate? Fugitive!" Applejack exclaimed, jumping out of her seat.

"Hey, it seems like I shouldn't be here for this, I'm gonna take a step outside if that's okay," Kelly softly spoke, making her way to the door that she originally came in when she left the barn.

"Oh buck," Big Mac said under his breath. "Hey, sis. You get all that worked out. I'm- I'm going to take our good loooooong time friend outside. Keep her out of your mane while you talk with your buddies."

"Hold it right there, civilian," Spearhead ordered, trying to sound as intimidating as possible. "Who's your friend... there," He quickly trailed off, taking in all the features of Kelly.

"Hey!" The Earth pony shouted, pointing his spear at Kelly. "Look! Only stands on two legs, no body fur, and no claws or fangs. That thing is a human!"

The unicorn grabbed his sword with his magic and drew it. He pointed it first at Granny, then Kelly. "No pony move," His voice trembled and he was visibly frightened.

"Celestia said the humans could be dangerous like Sunset Shimmer," The earth pony rattled off, sounding just as frightened as the unicorn. "I've heard the stories of Sunset. She took out over a dozen guards. Not even Celestia was able to stop her."

The earth pony guard struggled to steady his spear and keep it trained on Kelly. "The princess demands an audience with you."

Kelly backed away, trying to make her way to the door. "Mac. Granny. Applejack. I didn't do anything. I don't know what they're talking about."

Granny slid off her stool, marching up to Spearhead. A stern glare from her aging eyes beating down on him. "Now hold it just a minute there, Buster. Kelly is here with us, and she-"

Spearhead brushed her aside into Applejack. "She is coming with us. As are you, Applejack."

Applejack steadied Granny back up on all fours. "You all need to calm down, just let us talk to Kelly first."

"No! I'm not going anywhere with you." Kelly turned to reach for the doorknob but was stopped by the earth pony jumping in front of her. She doubled back as the tip of the spear came dangerously close to her face. "Mac! Don't let them take me."

The chaos that followed was a mesh of fear and stupidity that would leave lasting damages and shape major future events. In many ways, this is where it all went wrong.

Kelly turned her back to the earth pony guard and threw herself into Big Mac's neck. She wrapped her arms around him for protection. Spearhead moved up, cutting off the line of sight between the earth pony and the unicorn. The unicorn pressed forward to separate the two, but only took a single step in before Applejack reached out and pulled back on his armor, trying to stop him. The earth pony guard readied his weapon and ordered Kelly away from the civilian.

Big Mac brought his left front leg up to pull Kelly in closer to him at the same time that he noticed the unicorn brought his sword back and struck Applejack in the head with the hilt which nocked her back.

Big Mac in a fit of panic, shouted to the unicorn. "No! Stop!"

The earth pony could only see Kelly grabbing Big Mac, and assumed that he was yelling at her to stop. The young royal guard reacted the only way he thought he should at this alien threat attacking a fellow Equestrian.

"Treacherous Beast!" The royal guard yelled before thrusting his spear in a misguided attempt of bravery and defense for another pony.

There was no drawn-out contemplation of what transpired. Kelly didn’t stop to question why the pain had ripped its way through her side and radiated through her ribs. Her body stiffened, but her legs buckled. Then her lips parted just enough for her gut to steal one short and powerful gasp.

The change in Kelly’s posture, as well as her gasp for air, forced Big Mac’s attention away from his sister and back to Kelly. He reared his head up and pulled his eyes back in line with hers.

Big Mac didn’t see the pain in her eyes at first glance. It was the terror she felt that was all too easy to read. Those shinning windows to the soul, decorated with splashes of brown and amber, that previously shined with such alluring beauty, were now shallow and desperate.

Still holding onto Big Mac, Kelly’s fingers curled and tightened. One hand gripping his mane and the other pressing through the fur on his neck and clawing at his skin. Then like a banshee, she wailed a deafening scream that froze every pony in the room. So immobilized were the unprepared ponies, the earth pony guard didn’t even retract his weapon.

Kelly pulled herself away. The shaft bowed under the pressure of her torn flesh bearing down against the tip of the spear and its awkward angle.

Immediately Kelly felt the warmth running down her side, blood pumping out with every heartbeat. She stumbled a few steps away from the bloodied edges of the spear and grasped over the wound with her palm before she collapsed. Her back slammed with the full weight of her body into the lower cupboards. She slid further down to her side, the blood already soaking her shirt left a smear of the crimson as she decented to the floor.

She held up her hand to assess the damage, no patch of skin was left unpainted in red. She called out just as loud as her scream before. “Cerb!”

“WHAT DID YOU DO!” Big Mac boomed, the rage turning his innocent presence to one so domineering that even Spearhead shuttered.

“Oh my gosh! Kelly!” Applejack shouted as she rushed over to Kelly’s side, only to be blocked off by Spearhead’s outstretched wing.

"Hey? What the?" Applejack protested.

The frightened Gary Stu earth pony quivered under the vehement approach of Big Mac. The situation was out of their control, and this foolish guard rationalized the idea that he needed to take it back himself.

“Citizen!” He weakly commanded. “I need you to step aside, or you will be charged with aiding and-“

Big Mac could no longer tolerate any more of these royal thugs, and this puffed-up pony before him would be the first to face his wrath.

Big Mac needed only to lean forward to close the distance between him and the earth pony. Coming in fast with a battle cry, he brought down his teeth on the poor pony's snout and clamped down tight. Ignoring the pleading screams to let go, Big Mac shook the pony hard in his jaws just as a predator would its prey.

Big Mac thrashed the guard trapped in his maw. Slamming him into the kitchen counters, the table, then up off his hooves and down into the floor.

Spearhead jumped in to rescue his comrade but was stopped by the battered guard's body slamming into him. He was struck hard enough by the ragdoll guard that it lifted him off his hooves and sent him into the unicorn that was too awestruck to react.

Another round of thrashing and Big Mac finally released him on the upward shake, slamming him into the ceiling.

The guard's body crashed against the plaster overhead, sending broken shards off in all directions. Now barely conscious, the pony fell into the empty bucking zone of Ponyville’s number one apple tree bucker. The pony mentally braced for an impact he could not avoid. And with a mighty buck, the guard was fired off to the wall like a cannonball, via a two iron horseshoe delivery service.

The wall stood no chance against the stallion's body at such speeds and force. The timber was ripped off and splintered as most of the outside wall was obliterated in a spectacle of wood, glass, plaster, and pony all tossed out into the lawn.

The unicorn guard struggled to come to his feet. Spearhead was stunned from the impact and was slow to stand up or let the unicorn out from under him. “Spearhead! Get ahold of yourself! We need to reign in this renegade pony!”

The unicorn finally managed to push Spearhead up with the combined effort of his hooves and magic. His sword and shield levitated back up to him, and he readied himself for combat.

“Big Mac, no!” Applejack shouted in the towering sight of her brother.

The unicorn then saw it, too. Big Mac had the leather strap around his hoof and just finished the last tightening spin. The unicorn dropped his sword and cowered under his shield. Quietly he prayed. “Celestia, as your faithful royal guard, I pray that you may protect me from all threats that-“

Big Mac swung down with full force. The mallet struck the shield, dead center, creating a gong that rang through the whole house and echoed far past the borders of the orchard. Down below, a second gong from the shield rang out while bouncing in the cellar and echoed up through the new pony-sized hole in the kitchen floor.

That was more than enough to put Spearhead back in the proper headspace. He grabbed the sword in his left-wing and jumped back to take him out of striking range. “Big Mac! By the authority of the Royal Guards of Equestria, you are under arrest for interfering with her majesties orders and the assault of two of her royal guards. You will be treated as an enemy hostile and detained by force unless you drop your weapon and surrender the human accomplice, now! ”

Big Mac sidestepped to Kelly, still slumped over and struggling to hold the wound in her side closed. He slung back the mallet behind him and stretched out his free hoof to her.

As difficult as it was to do, she let go of her wound and reached out with her bloody hand, interlocking it with his fetlock. He pulled her in close to his chest and let her move her hand back up to cover on her wound again. He held her tightly and added more pressure to the bleeding gash.

“It’ll be a bright and sunny day in Tartarus before I let any of you close to Kelly or any of her friends again,” Big Mac snarled in defiance.

Spearhead was almost happy to hear the refusal. "That was your third and final mistake."

Kelly started to mumble something, though her sobs made it hard to understand, “Get Cerb. Lumberman. Take me home.”

“Don’t worry Miss Kelly, I’ll make sure you get home. Don’t you worry about that one bit.” Big Mac assured her as he walked her closer to the open wall.

“Ya hear me?” Big Mac asked.

Kelly didn’t answer. Her head slumped down, and her body went limp.

Big Mac gently shook her. “Kelly. You still with me? Miss Kelly? Come on now.” After she didn’t reply again, Big Mac started to panic. “Miss Kelly?” He looked down to see her still breathing, but otherwise lifeless.”

The familiar sound of the truck's engine revving up roared outside from the barn made its way through the busted wall. Big Mac's ears turned to the source and recognized the noise. He softly laid Kelly down on the floor, knowing what it meant. “Applejack. Take Miss Kelly outside to her friends. I’m not done with Flathead, here.”

“My name Spearhead, you traitor,” the pegasus spat.

Big Mac glared down across the room to the confident pegasus. “That’s where you’re wrong. It’s Flathead. And I have the mallet to prove it.”

Applejack ran to her brother's side and slipped herself under Kelly's arm and started to carry her out. “Now don’t you do nothing foolish, Big Mac.”

“I won’t,” Big Mac boasted, bouncing the mallet up and down in his hoof.

“And don’t you go loosing, neither,” Applejack added.

“Of course not, sis.” Big Mac grunted, bringing the mallet up ready for another swing. “That would be foolish.”

Applejack was only a few steps through the busted wall, and Cerb was already running up on her.

Cerb sped up the porch to Applejack, Kelly's limp body half on Applejack's back and the other drug through the scattered pieces of the busted wall. A trail of blood dripped and was smeared along their path. “What happened? What happened to Kelly?” Cerb demanded, sounding just as furious as Big Mac was moments ago.

Applejack helped slide Kelly off her back and into Cerb’s arms. “I dunno what’s going on. Celestia’s guards showed up saying they need me to go to y’all’s place so she could talk to your friends about some wanted criminal named Sunset Shimmer.”

Both ponies in the house finally ended the standoff and charged each other, yelling like madmen. Spearhead raised himself in the air and kicked the kitchen table into Big Mac's gut, taking him down to the floor.

Big Mac landed on his back as the table came to a stop over him. He grunted angrily, coming into the fight with this kind of disadvantage. As he glared, looking up at the underside the table, Spearhead's swords stabbed through and pierced into the floor, missing Big Mac's face by only inches and cutting off a lock of hair. His eyes focused on the blade, seeing just how close it came. He then looked back up again. "What happened to being detained?"

Spearhead struggled to pull the blade out, getting it wedged in the flooring. He grunted as he strained. "Gah! I hope this thing is stuck in your stupid face!"

Big Mac snorted hard, literally huffing steam. "Typical elitist pegasus. Still needs an earth pony to do the heavy lifting," Big Mac mocked while curling up his rear legs and positioning his hooves under the center of the table.

Another mighty buck from the big red stallion sent the table rocketing up. Spearhead, sword and all, crashed into the ceiling, sandwiched between the table that cracked around the polished gold armor of the Pegasus.

Spearhead grit his teeth, looking down at the table as it fell away while he remained loosely stuck in the ceiling. As the table dropped further, he could see just past its edge that the mallet was drawing back again for an upward strike. He flexed his wings, pushing him out of the plaster and releasing him. As fast as he could, he flapped his right wing with a powerful thrust and turned his body. That's all he needed to fly out from above the table as Big Mac delivered a devastating blow to it.

The table cracked again under the force of the mallet and broke through the weakened upstairs flooring, the table itself then snapped apart, freeing the sword.

Spearhead smashed his hooves against the wall and bucked himself off back to the fight. Flying in, he caught the sword in his teeth and moved in to slash at his big red target.

Big Mac arched back, narrowly missing the blade cutting through the air.

Spearhead landed on the floor, dropped the sword from his mouth and into his waiting wing. With a firm grasp on it again, he thrust himself back into the fight.

The house quickly came filled with the sounds of their weapons clashing together. The battle intensified, and all the clamoring from their crashing and smashing as they tore the house apart broke out into the open air.

Cerb didn't have the luxury of joining the fight at the moment. Kelly lay in his arms, unconscious and blood still spilling out under his hand. He had carried Kelly down the porch and now ran towards the barn.

Applejack followed Cerb by his side. “Then they realized that Kelly was a human and said they were gonna take her back to yer place, whether she liked it or not. Then…” Applejack shook her head. I dunno what all happened next. I got thumped on the head, one of the guards stabbed Kelly with his spear for no good reason at all, and then Big Macintosh just went ballistic on all of 'em. And where are we going?"

Applejacks ears twisted toward an unfamiliar mechanical noise. "What’s that sound?”

On cue, Lumberman pulled out of the barn with the tires spinning and kicking up dust. He whipped the truck around and steered towards them.

Applejack remembered the large yellow wagon machine from the human's house. She wondered what type of magic must be used to make the oversized contraption move on its own like it did.

“We heard Kelly scream and started running," Cerb explained, panting with Kelly still in his arms. "Then we saw something crash through your wall, so I told Lumberman to get the truck. Figured it was time to get the fuck out of here.” Cerb finished explaining.

“It wasn’t a thing that crashed through the wall. It was him!” Applejack trotted in pace with Cerb and pointed with her hoof at the white earth pony.

The pony she pointed to was knocked out cold, covered in debris from his forceful exit of the house, and heaped up in a lump on the lawn. The bumps and bruises he got from Big Mac's beating showed through every area of his body not covered in armor. His snout stuck out as especially bruised and swollen around the bite mark.

“That be the feller that stabbed Kelly,” Applejack revealed. “What you see there is all Big Mac’s doing.”

Almost too fast to be safe, Lumberman pulled up alongside them. “What the fuck happened here?! And who the fuck is Big Mac fighting in there?!” Lumberman yelled out through the passenger window, pointing to the hole in the side of the farmhouse.

Looking inside, it was clear that Big Mac was in a struggle. He swung the mallet frantically trying to take down the last royal guard, but that Pegasus could dance. One short flap of his wings had him dart in any which direction he wanted. Just as nimble; however, Big Mac managed to dodge or block each slash and jab of the sword the Pegasus somehow managed to hold in his wings.

Cerb turned back to the truck and opened the rear side door. He laid Kelly halfway onto the floor of the back seat, resting her hand over her still bleeding wound. “Applejack, sit back here with Kelly, pull her in the rest of the way, and keep the pressure on the wound. James, take them back to the house. Have Becky stitch her up. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Be back as soon as you can? Where the fuck you going?” Lumberman demanded. “Get in the fucking truck. Let’s go!”

Cerb backed up enough to let Applejack jump in with Kelly. “Mac’s still in there. No one get’s left behind.” He proclaimed as a matter of fact while helping to bring Kelly's legs in. With Kelly in, and Applejack tending to her, he shut the door.

“Exactly!” Lumberman shouted. “You're someone! I ain't leaving you here!”

Back in the house, both stallions were panting, though neither would yield. Spearhead cautiously stepped around the debris in the room, keeping pace with Big Mac. “Okay, this has gone on long enough,” Spearhead announced before dropping his sword.

Big Mac couldn’t tell if this was some kind of diversion, or if the pegasus was surrendering. The answer came with Spearhead stomping his hoof on the blunt end of the spear the earth pony guard had dropped.

The spear flipped up and spun in a blur where Spearhead managed to snatch it out of the air in mid-spin. Not only did he catch it, he quickly demonstrated his familiarity with the weapon. Spinning it around his hooves and back, never letting it come in contact with the surroundings. This was his weapon of mastery.

The last guard stood poised and ready, the spear in his hooves held firm and steady. “I’m about to show you why my name is Spearhead,” He threatened through gritted teeth.

“Spearhead, look out!” Granny Smith shouted out behind him.

Spearhead reactively turned to face the new threat. Unfortunately, he did not turn fast enough, and something black and metallic struck him between the eyes. Whatever it was, when it connected with his helmet, it released a pleasant aroma of apples and cinnamon. A bit burnt, but still pleasing to the senses.

Granny Smith glared daggers at the staggered Pegasus. “I just threw a frying pan at yer face. Haha! Take that ya orange peel eaten jerk!”

The final guard's vision flashed to all white, and he had become disorientated. The frying pan that struck him delivered something much worse than a headache could ever bring on.

“Hey, Flathead!” Big Mac yelled out.

Spearhead turned to where he heard Big Mac’s voice. Several frightening images of a giant angry farm horse holding a mallet slowly came into focus and spun around each other. “It’s- “ He stumbled forward awkwardly, yet still determined - “Spearhead.”

“Not after this,” Big Mac corrected him.

The last thing Spearhead saw was several Big Mac’s on their hind legs all taking a step forward, their front right hoofs stretched out behind them and their mallets arching up towards him.

He was defeated without further protest. Waiting for the final blow, he gripped his spear as tightly as he could with whatever pride as a royal guard he had left, shut his eyes, and waited for the darkness to embrace him.

When Big Mac's swing connected, Spearhead felt nothing. Not the mallet's impact jarring his brain against his cranium, not the metal of his helmet flattening over his head, nor his face busting through the kitchen floor. Those were all things he would feel when he woke up staring down into the cellar.

Big Mac stood triumphant and exhausted, still holding the mallet that trapped the head of his new enemy in the floor.

Cerb peaked his head around into the kitchen from the remaining section of the wall still standing. He didn’t expect to see the scene Big Mac had created. Cerb peered into what looked like Big Mac standing over a horse decapitated by his mallet. “Is it clear?”

Big Mac didn’t even look back, “Eeyup.”

Cerb stepped in and examined all the damage. “Jesus, fuck… How many of these pricks did you kill?”

Big Mac snapped his attention to Cerb and all but jumped in shock. “Kill! I didn’t kill no pony. They’ll be fine.”

Spearheads leg twitched, and a wing rapidly tried to flap and stretch in short jerky contractions.

Big Mac pulled the mallet out of the hole he smashed Spearhead’s face through. “I mean. Not today, obviously.”

Granny Smith crept over, looking down the first hole from the unicorn guard, and then shook her neck to the pegasus. "Certainly not tomorrow, neither."

As much as Cerb wanted to explore this, there were more pressing matters at hand. “Okay, Big Red. I owe you, but we need to get Kelly out of here. I need to know what they did to her. Was she poisoned or did they use some kind of magic to knock her out?”

The sound of glass and wood snapping pulled their attention as Lumberman back the truck up to the porch in front of the kitchen.

Lumberman put the truck and park and stuck his torso out the window, waving his hand frantically. "We gotta go, now," Lumberman spoke up just low enough for them to hear, but did so with urgency.

A knock came from the front door again. "Apples! This is the Canterlot Royal Guard. We're here to rendezvous with Spearhead and the rest of our squad to escort Miss Applejack to the princess. We also heard sounds of a struggle on our way here. We may require your assistance?"

"Rest of the squad?" Cerb uttered under his breath. "Fucking A. Squads can be up to twelve strong."

Cerb patted Big Mac on his chest and looked down to Granny. "Mac, Granny, get in the truck. We'll get you out of here."

"No," Granny protested. "You two go, I'll distract them."

"Granny?" Big Mac questioned her offer.

Granny turned to Cerb. "You there, big fella. Get your friends and Macintosh somewhere safe." She turned to Big Mac. "Don't worry about me. I can handle this."

Big Mac protested. "But Granny?"

"Mac," Cerb tugged on Big Mac's horse collar. "Come on, we gotta go now," He ordered before hurrying back and jumping into the bed of the truck.

"Mac," Granny said softly, placing a hoof on Big Mac's cheek. "I know why you did what'cha did."

Big Mac looked back to Granny, who was oddly smiling warmly with knowing eyes. He couldn't believe she already knew.

"You can't help her by staying here or getting carted off to the dungeon," Granny explained. "Now go with them, but don't leave until the music starts. That contraption is too noisy. You'd never get out unnoticed," she instructed, walking calmly out to the next room where the pounding on the door came again.

Big Mac swallowed hard and nodded. "Thanks, Granny."

Big Mac trotted over and stepped into the metal bed of the truck as quietly as he could. "Hold on. Granny said not to leave until she turns the music on."

Lumberman opened a sliding glass panel on the back window. "Where's the Granny horse?"

Cerb moved his face in front of the window. "Just hold a sec, she said not to leave until the music starts."

Lumberman could have popped a blood vessel. "What the fuck are you talking about? What the fuck we need music for?" He stage whispered furiously. "We need to get Kelly out of her right the fuck now. Get your Granny in here and let's go."

Applejack looked up, still holding Kelly up against her and doing her best to control the bleeding. "Big Mac, what do you mean wait till the music starts? What's Granny doing?

Static and the crackling pops of a record player suddenly were heard from somewhere in the house. Mac, Cerb, and Lumberman silently looked back to into the house. Applejack turned an ear to the open window.

More knocking came pounding on the front door. Whoever was out there started yelling into the door about who they were and why they were there again. Then the music began to play and all but drowned them out. The music seemed familiar. It sounded like something resembling the 1920's styled saloon piano music. The kind where ladies dressed in western-themed Cabaret and would dance on stage and do the cancan.

"Is that?" Cerb asked, almost apologetically.

Big Mac sighed, knowing exactly what she was doing. "Go now. Please."

"Got it," Lumberman answered and moved back to his seat. He popped the gear in drive and eased the truck out and away from the house, making sure the engine stayed only to a low idle.

Pulling away, the music started to fade. Granny's voice was only once loud enough to be heard. "Guards! Guards! Help me! Somepony has stolen my morals and good sense of judgment!"

Cerb turned to Big Mac, looking on him with a mix of respect and sorrow for Granny's sacrifice. "Dude. Your grandma is a fucking boss."

Big Mac glanced back to his home and the grandmother he regretfully abandoned. "I don't know what that means, but I'm sure you're right."

Faintly in the distance, the royal guard's struggle grew to a whisper. "Lady! Control yourself! Stop removing his armor!"

Cerb nodded. "A fucking boss."