“Soren, please come out!” Lyra pleads from the other side of the door. “I know you’re upset, but you can’t just lock yourself away in the bathroom for the remainder of the spell’s duration.”

“Damned if I won’t try!” I whimper out loud. “Last night never should have happened!”

“Bon-Bon and I already apologized, Soren!” she says with a sigh. “What more do you want?”

“I want to be able to trust you again!” The hiss of my voice hurts my throat. It’s only natural considering I only finished crying and screaming in the bath a short while ago. Given that I woke up face down in my female-self’s cleavage and an unconscious Bon-Bon sprawled across my aching flank, is it any real surprise how freaked out I am? As much as I try to fight the feelings of betrayal and vulnerability, I can’t. “I trusted you to ensure I didn’t do anything stupid, and even if I acted like I wanted it, I was drunk! I didn’t know what I wanted! There was no informed consent! That’s a sex crime in my world!”

She seems to shut up at that. I’d worry about whether or not that might be a low blow considering that it’s apparently not the first time she’s gotten grabby, but I’m still trying to glue my head on straight. There’s this unbearable headache eating away at my mind, and my painkillers aren’t in reach. Some peace and quiet is all I really want until further notice.

The whole drunken orgy business is only half of the reason I don’t want to see Lyra, though. There’s also the matter that I somehow managed to cram myself into the cabinets under their bathroom sink. I don’t remember exactly how it happened. All I know is that after I got out of the bath, I thought how badly I wanted a dark and quiet place to lay low for a while; the next thing I know, I’m crammed underneath the sink. To make things worse, I can’t get out.

With a sigh, I realize that as much as I’d like to stay mad at Lyra—Celestia knows I probably have every right to be angry—I’m practically trapped; getting out from under the sink is impossible for me alone. Even if trusting her is the last thing I want to do right now, I have to swallow my pride. “Lyra? You still there?”

There’s a short pause before she speaks. “Yeah.”

“I’ll come out, but you’ve gotta Pinkie Promise me two things.” I moan around the u-bend in the sink. I wait until she gives a committal grunt. “First, promise me you’ll never do anything to breach my trust again. Second, promise me you won’t laugh when you come in.”

“What?” I hear her voice on the other side of the door. “Oh, right. I Pinkie Promise not to laugh, and not to do anything to ruin your trust ever again. I cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.” It’ll have to do. With all the willpower I can muster, I focus on unlocking the door. After only a minute, I hear a click, followed by the door being pushed open. “Soren, where are you?”

“In here," I whisper sheepishly. It’s rather awkward to do so with one of my legs woven through a rack beneath the sink, but somehow, I manage to push one of the cabinet doors open, allowing me to peer sidelong at Lyra. If the situation weren’t so dour, I’d almost call the mixture of shock, confusion, and amusement on her face comical. “A little help please?”

It seems like Lyra’s been gone an awful long time now. Just how long ago did Lyra give up on trying to pry me out of there and leave to get Twilight Sparkle? That must have been at forty minutes ago, but then again, who can be sure? Time passes very strangely when you’re in a cramped, dark place. For all I know, she’s only been gone a few minutes and is bound to be gone for a while yet.

As if to reassure me, the sound of voices begins flowing through the house. “Tell me again why you need my help, Lyra.” Twilight’s voice is incredulous and pained; she’s probably just as hungover as I am. “If Soren trapped himself in the bathroom, isn’t that a job for a locksmith?”

“You’ll see when you get there.”

A few minutes pass before the darkness of my prison is intruded upon by the opening cabinet door. Still woefully unable to turn my head, my only recourse is to turn my eye and offer her an embarrassed smile. “Mornin’, Twilight,” I say, shifting meekly in my position beneath the sink. “Lovely morning for a hangover, huh?”

Twilight’s jaw drops as she peers down at me, her facial expression rife with disbelief. “Just how drunk did you get last night?” she whispers. I reckon she would probably say it louder, but her reddened eyes reaffirm that she’s pretty hung over. “I’ve heard of ponies doing strange things while intoxicated, but never anything like this—even from Pinkie!”

Rolling my eyes, I bang a hoof against the pipe. “I wasn’t drunk when this happened... not to say I didn’t do something I regret when I was drunk.” Lyra and I exchange uncomfortable looks, and then I shy away. “I ended up in here wanting to be somewhere dark and quiet.”

“I think he somehow teleported without knowing how...” Lyra mutters.

Twilight looks to Lyra and then back to me. “If that’s true, then he’s incredibly lucky that he didn’t—”

“I’m lucky that I didn’t end up inside a wall; I know!” I whine. “Can you please get me out of here, Twilight?”

There’s the slightest pulling at the corner of her mouth. She looks away only for a moment, but I can just make out her saying something under her breath. “I was going to say materialize without a head...” In a louder voice she adds, “Yes, getting you out of there will be simple. I can just grab your hoof and teleport us somewhere else.”

A sudden thought strikes me. Perhaps I can use this as an excuse to get away from Lyra. Sure, I would have to forgo taking my painkillers, but I’m willing to take the risk at this point. I need time to think, alone. It’s not an unreasonable thing, the more I think about it. “Twi, do you think maybe you could blink us both back to the library instead of here?”

From over Twilight’s shoulder, I catch a glimpse of a very short disapproving look from a crouched Lyra. “What about me? Would I have to walk there?” She crosses her arms in front of her chest, and I’m thankful that she’s at least clothed now.

How how it’d be nice to not have my neck through this u-bend beneath the sink. It’d be much easier to shake my head then. “No, Lyra. You would stay here.” I sigh and turn my gaze away from the open cabinet door. “I’m absolving you of your responsibility today. If it upsets Bon-Bon, tell her that I need some time to myself.”

“I’m not sure I can teleport all the way to the library with you—at least not in my present state—but I’ll certainly try.” Twilight’s voice draws me back to the moment at hoof. She gives a pained smile before grabbing a hold of the closest hooves with her own. Her horn aglow, she decides on some faux dramatic flared, saying, “Hold on to your hooves, this might singe a bit.”

Before I have a chance to ready myself, my entire vision is filled with a bright purple-white light. My center of balance, already screwed from being crammed under the sink for too long, plummets as my entire being vanishes and reappears elsewhere. My lungs fill with air and then just as quickly deflate as I’m dropped unceremoniously on a dirt road. As my eyes readjust to the outdoors, I’m happy to see that we are only a few houses down the road from the library.

Stiffly rising up, I quickly jump on Twilight and wrap my hooves around her neck in a hug. “Thank you, Twilight! You have no idea how badly I had to get away from her.” Quickly releasing the unicorn, I give her some space. “Er... Lyra didn’t say anything about what happened last night, did she?”

“No, not at all.” One of those pained expressions takes over her face again. “Why? She didn’t... Oh, not again... At this rate, she’s really going to get herself into the stocks.”

“I don’t want to talk about whatever drunken tomfoolery occurred last night,” I say a bit too quickly, bringing my forehooves up in front of me. “What happened stays between Lyra, Bon-Bon, and me.”

Well, if she didn’t have any idea what I was talking about before, I’m pretty sure I just gave everything away. The way her eyes widen and her ears fall flat against the sides of her head leaves me with no doubt that she’s figured it out. “Soren, did they... If they did something to you last night, you might feel better if you talked to somepony.”

“I don’t want to talk about it, I said!” I snap, almost shouting it. Twilight shrinks back at my words, her ears somehow going even flatter against her skull. “I’m sorry for snapping like that... No Twilight I can’t talk about it right now. I’ve barely had time to think about it myself. I just want to go someplace quiet to think about things—everything—for a while.”

I turn away from Twilight and begin trotting away. It’s a lovely day, even with a splitting headache and an empty stomach. Surely I can find somewhere to sit and think. As if answering the unposed question, a small voice behind me says, “There’s a nice quiet park at the south side of town.”

Glancing back at Twilight’s own retreating form, I can’t help but respect her. I bit her head off and she still helped me. “Thanks, Twilight.”

Last night was a mistake; that much is certain. There is no denying that what happened is every bit my fault as everypony else. I behaved irresponsibly, and could very well have killed myself mixing those painkillers and alcohol. The fact that I willingly ignored those instructions and put Lyra’s life at risk just goes to show that the ‘self-preservation’ node Twilight mentioned isn’t doing a great job.

If I treated her body so poorly, and began behaving like a liquored up slut, why do I have any right to be upset with the outcome of being rutted like the mare in heat I was? Well, that’s pretty simple in my opinion! I was drunk, and taken advantage of, right? That’s a betrayal of trust no matter how you look at it! So what if they were every bit as drunk as me?

With a sigh, I rest my head across my hooves. Lying here on a bench in the park is relatively peaceful. Even with ponies here playing with their foals, there’s barely any noise. Unbelievably, just relaxing here is doing more for the headache than the painkillers ever did. It’s just a shame that my beautiful surroundings can’t change the turmoil in my mind and heart.

Would it be different if any pony other than Lyra had taken me in out of the kindness of their hearts? Quite possibly, yes. If it had been Twilight or Fluttershy, I doubt I would have been allowed to drink last night. If Pinkie had been there in the hospital with me, she’d have known about me being in season, and wouldn’t have dosed any of the cupcakes with that whatever-it-was that she got from Zecora. Rarity, AJ and Rainbow Dash would probably be wildcards because of their siblings or relatives...

Siblings... Dear Celestia! If anypony other than Lyra had taken me, I don’t think I’d have been there for Sweetie Belle if not for Lyra. That filly would be dead right now if Lyra hadn’t taken me with her to Sweet Apple Acres—if she hadn’t taken me in. Any way I look at it, a family would be mourning the loss of a foal if not for Lyra. What gives me the right to wish the past changed, knowing that I’d be condemning a foal to death?

Speaking of foals, I notice a small diapered pony peel off from the herd. Nopony else seems to notice the little foal make a break for it. The little bugger is moving at a decent clip heading south. Wow, an unattended filly or colt could get into some real trouble. I look back to the herd in the park, but still nopony has noticed a missing little one.

“Hey, somepony’s foal is getting away!” I shout towards the park. Unbelievably, nopony seems to react. In spite of it all, everything is deathly quiet, to boot.

Wait... Isn’t the Everfree forest south of town?

OH FUCK!

Lyra and sexual misconduct be damned. That foal is heading straight for the Everfree! The thundering of my hooves on the dirt and cobblestone path fills my ears as I struggle to catch up to the foal. No way a foal should be able to outrun a fully grown pony, but sure enough this little foal—a pegasus buzzing along with his tiny little wings—is fast. “Hey, wait up, little guy! You really shouldn’t go in there.”

The sound of childish laughter fills my ears as the cream foal peers over his shoulder. His fiendish little brown eyes glisten in the sunlight and his brown mane dances in the breeze as he tears on. He’s almost familiar, but I just can’t place him. Just when I think I’m close enough to grab him, though, he darts off at an angle. Good Luna, this kid is quick. The moment I try to grab the tiny pegasus with my magic, however, a tinge of pain floods my head. Magic is out, it seems.

On and on the chase goes. The closer we get to the Everfree we get, the stranger I begin to feel. Not only is there a feeling of dread flooding my very being—some sort of inbred fear of areas outside of pony-kind’s control?—a strange electric tingle is coursing through my very veins the closer we draw to the treeline. Each step I take causes a surge of energy to flow through me.

I hit the treeline, and a bright purple-white light fills my vision. The familiar disorienting feeling hits my stomach, and when the blindness subsides, I can’t believe my eyes. Unable to believe what I’m seeing, I sink to my knees in front of the Ponyville library.

“No no no... this can’t be happening!”

Author's Notes:

Re-edited 12 July 2017