"It's probably that little tart Cadenza." Chief huffed behind Sunset and Torque, the latter of which practically felt her eyes on his flank. "She's been on a matchmaking bender lately, but I can't figure out why. It's not like Equestria is suffering a lack of love."

"...You know, I was really expecting to have to figure that out for myself," Torque replied. "You know... like having to go investigate the matter, piece clues together and basically run around pretending we're Sherclop Pones solving the big mystery."

"We have nothing to prove, Dumbass. The three of us each probably have a better grasp of Forensics than the rest of the country combined, special exceptions notwithstanding," Sunset snapped, recognizing that her once-jeopardized plans for the day actually still had a chance. "Look, the stupid bimbo failed at mind controlling you and if she had half a brain cell, probably booked it when you alerted everypony to her shenanigans."

"So... are the other thirty or so ponies here all members of that 'special exceptions' category?" Torque chipped smugly. Sunset wanted to punch him in his Applewood-ready teeth, but she was too busy being surprised at not knowing something he knew.

"What? Thirty? What the hay are you talking about?" Sunset demanded, but mercifully opted to look for herself rather than wait for a response that would probably have only made her angrier. True enough, there was a much larger crowd gathered at their Badging Ceremony than she initially believed. "How... When did they all get here?"

"Most of them arrived in the interim between your arrival and this idiot finally showing up," Chief interjected, unable to believe how fast kids these days not only talked, but changed subjects. Like most bosses, especially those even the least militant in nature, she hated the young stallion's predisposition for being late, losing things, and forgetting verbal instructions. He was so inherently ill-suited to conventional military that she couldn't grasp how he managed to get into the Royal Guard. "Don't worry about that for now. The ceremony's been trashed. You're dismissed."

"Wait, do you mean 'dismissed' as in 'fired', or do you just-"

"It means GET OUT OF MY FACE, HALF-BREED!" There was a protracted silence after the older mare's outburst, the kind that was usually emphasized by a random cough. Chief was unfortunately deprived of such a reprieve. Fortunately, she too was capable of changing tack. "Hey. Don't forget your badges, morons!"

Chief half-heartedly tossed the two ponies' freshly-minted badges in their direction. Fresh Agents were treated to this desecration of their badges to remind them that their roles were not those of either glory or authority. Excessively violent ponies were trash allowed to live only by the grace of Princess Celestia's infinite tolerance. However, the two kids both caught their respective badges in their star fields, thus preventing the customary skid across the floor to bump pathetically into their hooves.

Chief and the rest of the veteran Agents just stared dumbfounded as the two newbies, who should have been awestruck by this validation of their accomplishments, only inspected them long enough to verify the lack of clearly visible flaws and immediately stashed them in their Pockets of Holding. She looked deep into the eyes of each in turn and found Sunset entirely emotionally unmoved by recent events, revealing in turn that more than any of her seniors and predecessors, the precious facet of her soul that instilled the value of life was DEAD. Torque, predictably, immediately broke eye contact and shut down any further attempts at subtle probing, granting her nothing but a reminder that he was capable of even more than what it took to get him here. This knew nowledge unsettled her, not least because it made her wonder what kind of moral codes they operated on.

Then they left, only the act of leaving was kind of like leaving home to get groceries after marathoning spy thrillers. The physical aspect of the process was easy: a short walk down a path that led through a gate in the wall and back out into life. The mental aspect was more challenging: sorting out information based on a complex and vague algorithm of security level and desire to talk about things; re-conditioning the mind to better fit in with noncombatants; and of course, scanning one's surroundings for potential threats. Sunset couldn't tell if her partner was doing all or none of these things. So she opted to talk about the one subject raised inside that she felt was safe outside, after of course pushing Torque to a Neighponese noodle shop that had opened a few blocks away recently.

"Wow... I can't believe she called you that in front of everypony." Sunset began, adopting the tones that she would go on to perfect as she infiltrated and destroyed cults and cliques alike. The difference here was that her sympathy was sincere.

"Called me what?" Torque asked as he mounted one of the stools in a series of motions that while small, was still more fluid and dynamic than Sunset felt was appropriate.

"You know... a half-breed," Sunset replied, expecting to hear shattering porcelain or thunder or any kind of ominous sound effect to accompany the term, but none did.

"Why is that so hard to believe? I'm honestly glad that someone in Chief's position is as informed as she is, even if the matter is as trivial as the nature of my birth. Although she's technically incorrect. It's more accurate to say that I'm a Quarter-horse." He managed to tear his eyes off the menu long enough to meet the eyes of the devastatingly cute waitress, who in turn seemed put out that he wasn't immediately charmed by the sight of her. "I'll have the shark fin bowl."

"What? So wait... what?" Sunset couldn't believe her ears. She'd heard that he'd come from low-borne, outlying routes, but she thought that was just slander. "Quarter? You have four breeds in you? Bullshit, otherwise you'd be an Alicorn! Oh! I'll have a large egg-drop soup!"

Chawan, the waitress in question, just stared at her. Sunset made a sign that was the ugly lovechild of a sigh and a growl. It seemed there was going to be no end to the stupid looks she got today.

"Did I stutter, Runt? Go get my soup!" Sunset barked, Chawan bolted, and the conversation resumed. She was lit by his remarks. As a royal adoptee, she found the utter dismissal of the system that controlled her entire life and made it miserable to be gravely offensive. "And you! WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'trivial as the nature of my birth'!? DID YOU FORGET WHERE YOU ARE, ASSHOLE?"

"I didn't forget where I am, only where I'm from." Torque said, looking down with an expression that was sad enough it immediately cooled Sunset's temper. Then he smiled at her like he just remembered something funny, but his eyes revealed the lie in his expression. Sunset made a mental note to ask him why they were dull brown while he was inside and brilliant gold when out. "Well, sort of."

Their dinner was served, and Chawan was sufficiently intimidated by Sunset to not linger too long in their vicinity. She tried to look into his eyes and get a feel for his mood, but he was staring at the counter.

"Let's not talk about the past," he quipped, filling Sunset with an intense... relief? Disappointment? Suddenly realizing that they were both on the verge of publicly airing ghastly closet skeletons, she let him change tack. "The past is a dark place for ponies like us, and even talking about it would spoil our meal."

Sunset, in what many would probably find a shocking breach of character, quietly nodded and focused on eating. Well, first she focused on him eating, largely to figure out why Chawan was trying to stare holes into his cheeks and chest. Didn't she know those were SUNSET's property? This filly might have to disappear. As the two mares watched, Torque split a pair of chopsticks PERFECTLY then set about starting to eat, but didn't even get the first bite in when the waitress overcame her fear of his partner and bounded back over to them.

"Oh. Mygosh!" she cheered, revealing that the ponies who taught her Equestrian were from Applewood Valley and inspiring internal cringes from her audience. "I've never seen somepony break those evenly before! You must be so lucky!"

Poor Chawan. She was waiting for this opportunity to swoop in and tempt the stallion away from his insufferable mate, and he had just hoofed her an extraordinary one. The reward for her compliment was confusion, at first. But that was soon followed by realization, a flash of pity, and then a slightly better smile than the one Torque had just given Sunset.

"Well of course I'm lucky. The odds have been stacked against my survival from my conception until I joined the Guard. Also, I was born on July 21st in the Year of the Rabbit. But that's not necessarily a good thing, you know. It just means that I have a greater share of Lady Fortune's attention than most ponies, and as it so happens that she's only slightly less of a spastic bitch than Sunset here."

Chawan wilted to the tune of tending to dishes and Sunset punched him in the shoulder, hurting herself but at least getting his attention.

"Okay Asshole, here's the rub: One- you are NOT getting away with calling me a spastic bitch, and TWO- what weren't you telling Miss Squinty about the chopsticks?"

Torque tightened his lips at having been seen through, then looked around to make sure that neither Chawan nor anypony else of similar descent was nearby.

"One- Thank you for being unlike literally every other mare I've ever met and actually telling me exactly what you feel and why in no uncertain terms. Oh, and you're not a threat, and I recommend you disillusion yourself of the notion before it gets you hurt. Two- Breaking chopsticks evenly on a consistent basis is actually very easy, assuming they've been made with the barest modicum of quality control. Observe."

As he spoke, he lifted several sets of chopsticks to their table with his star field, then brought them before Sunset's eyes one at a time and broke them so she could see how he was doing it. "The cheapest method is, of course, to use an Arcane Scalpel to cut the sticks apart."

To illustrate his point, a tiny white crescent flashed in the center of the chunk of wood adjoining the chopsticks, carving it perfectly apart in the blink of an eye.

"I actually consider this method to be pretty banal, because at that point, why even bother packaging them as a single item and acting like there's an element of chance involved. That's why I prefer the Twinned Mage Hands method."

Torque split and condensed his starfield into what looked like two tiny, floating tentacled creatures and directed them to place the tips of said tentacles at positions along both sticks that looked both deliberate and random, including one pressed against each of the joined chopsticks' topmost corners. Then, with a quick and yet delicate tug, he pulled the two apart until they snapped into individual pieces. They split as evenly as the cut ones, but not as neatly. Sunset wanted to learn that trick too, but Torque wouldn't let her do it whenever Chawan or others of her ancestry were around (the latter of which expanded as the lunch rush hit), to her limitless frustration.

As punishment for his crimes, Sunset made him escort her to a gazebo overlooking the labyrinth, where she needled him until he reluctantly confessed to having had both his existing memories and his ability to form new ones severely damaged, and she guessed it was probably by the "Bottled Foalsitter" potion that had been in vogue when he was young. But the point was clear: her bodyguard couldn't trust anypony. He would never be able to form, let alone maintain, lasting interpony relationships. Between that and his bizarre ancestry that apparently allowed for carnivorism, he couldn't have been more alien if he was visiting from another world. Absent her company, he spent his days in the depths of the kind of loneliness that drove normal ponies to madness.

"I only really remember objects and actions. Data points, except strangely enough for trivia. I can speak foreign languages, but I can't understand them when they're spoken to me. Ponies, who they are, and what they say are all inevitably swallowed by the insatiable void that occupies the space in my mind where I should have a memory. Given the pattern so far, I'm pretty sure I'll forget you after having spent about one-quarter of the amount of time we spent together in your absence. I'm being hyperbolic of course. There's no way in Tartarus that the retention period is that long, or that easily gauged. So... really, in the interest of preserving your emotional and mental health, I have to STRONGLY urge you to keep our relationship strictly professional in nature."

(Oh... my... gosh, Mom...) Sunset thought, watching him stare at the labyrinth fight back tears over the things he lost and others he would never have. And win, apparently by trying to solve it. (He's perfect!)