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One of Those Days...

by Somber Star

Chapter 3: An Important Distinction

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An Important Distinction

"There is no doubt in anypony's mind that the Royal Guard represented the glory and power of Equestria as extensions of Princess Celestia's will to protect her subjects from incursions into her nation's borders."

Every Agent had heard the Chief Administrator's speech upon their Induction. While the ceremony was typically for an individual or tiny group of Agents due to their extremely low turnout, visits from other members of their clandestine force whether past or present were common. Ostensibly, the ceremony was for both Torque and Sunset, but all eyes were on her, which would be of immense relief to the former were she not his charge.

"Their golden armor not only serves to protect them from anything short of alicorn-level magic, it is also a symbol for all who see them whether friend or foe to ponykind."

While the large bluish-purple mare in a black suit made for a smaller pony rolled on through a monologue Torque felt like he could predict the course of, his attention started to wander. He realized that he was mistaken at first when he believed that nopony was giving him more than cursory glances. Although the absence of hostility made it difficult to pinpoint its origins, he was suddenly stricken by the notion that he had somepony's complete attention. Then he suddenly started to think things that were incredibly bizarre, not in nature but in intensity.

"As Agents, on the other hand, you take on a darker responsibility. That of Her Majesty's Wrath. I'm sure you're well aware, but Princess Celestia cannot effectively reduce the volume of her true destructive power to less than that of an average county. More importantly, given her immensely benign and forgiving nature, she suffers from being slow to strike where swiftness is needed."

(Sunset Shimmer is the most beautiful pony I've ever met. I can't stop thinking about her. I feel like she lights up my life. I want to be with her for- wait.) Relegating the nagging train of thought to a less relevant track, Torque started to try to pinpoint the source of the recent mental assault. It was far too subtle and effective to actually have been from Sunset, which meant that if he couldn't catch the pony responsible in the act, he would have to deal with answering a lot of annoying questions, like who would do such a thing to the two of them, and why.

"Agent 64, if you would please be so kind as to PAY ATTENTION when I am speaking to you. I don't hold these ceremonies for my health, you know."

"Oh! Um... well, you see. I was paying attention! A lot of it actually. It's just that only a small portion of it was actually to you. Heh. Heh.... I'm kind of not helping my case here, am I?"

"Torque..." Sunset whispered, only audible to him because he was right next to her and had sharp hearing. "This is the part where you lessen your embarrassment by shutting up."

Chief was tellingly silent. The entire room was silent. Nopony was going to bail out the guy who screwed up the Little Princess's latest "Big Special Day".

"Okay wait! What if I try to repeat back what you just said?" Torque said hurriedly, stealing quick glances around the room like a squirrel who just heard a hawk. "That'll show that I've at least been paying enough attention to remember it, right?"

"You're really failing at the whole 'shutting up' thing." Sunset whispered more harshly, subtly kicking him and rudely reminding herself of his 'impact negation' magic.

Chief tried to glare at him and failed. She looked confused for a moment, then broke into a small smile and a chuckle that shattered the icy veneer she'd been holding up since the two ponies first met her. If Torque had a real Special Talent, maybe that was it.

"All right kid," she said almost patronizingly, "give it your best shot. Bear in mind, though, that everypony's watching."

"Okay. Where do you want me to start?" Torque chimed back, almost happy for the opportunity.

"What?" Chief couldn't believe that anypony would be so craven as to claim to remember the contents of a speech they weren't listening to. Least of all any stallion.

"She's giving you a chance you don't deserve, and THAT'S what you're doing with it?" Sunset broke in, no longer whispering now that everything had been officially ruined forever. (Thanks, Jerk. I hope you never get a marefriend and die miserable and alone.)

"Where in your speech do you want me to start reciting?" Torque clarified, stuffing a hoof in Sunset's mouth. Luckily for her, the floors in the Canterlot Castle were sterile and Torque not only kept his hooves clean, he hadn't picked up the trend of coating them in some ridiculous substance.

"What was the last thing I said?" Chief demanded, ignoring the exchange in spite of this scrub's brazen disrespect for Princess Celestia's Adopted Daughter.

"'It is absolutely vital that Agents never forget that we have sole authority below the Princess to end the life of another pony. More importantly, that we have a solemn responsibility to never abuse that authority, nor to wield our power in the heat of passion or in any other state that compromises our judgment.'" Torque's eyes moved as though he was reading something, but Sunset triangulated off them and saw nothing in the direction he was looking.

"... I'm going to give that a pass, if only because you now have me immensely curious as to what exactly was distracting you from being instructed on how to safely handle your power and responsibility." Chief used her star field to force Torque to look directly into her eyes. Once she was sure contact was locked, she subtly tried to cast Command on him, only to find the spell loaded onto another train of thought to be relegated to a distant track.

"I'm... um... I kind of... don't want to talk about that, sorry." Torque said, then offered what Sunset would come to recognize as a very trademark grin. The expression seemed to take up his whole face without crossing the line into apparent mania. It was more than pleasant to look at: it was utterly disarming and potentially stunning, depending on how close to your 'type' he was. The big drawback was that it drew attention like lamps drew moths, and being extremely conscious of other ponies, Torque tried to resist the tiny flow of adrenaline into his veins as a result of the seeping paranoia.

"Oh? I'm sorry if my phrasing confused you, Soldier." Chief practically spat the word, wiping the smile off the young stallion's face and finding herself greeted by the intense frigidity that passed for his second default expression. "Tell me where your attention was and WHY."

"As you wish. During the course of this conversation, somepony invaded my mind and tried altering my thoughts, I can only assume in an effort to drive my behavior." Torque looked around again, and Sunset was sure that she would be "chasing his eyes" again were she not cringing from the reminder that she had recently failed to do just that. Chief was cringing in an identical fashion, -as was Princess Cadance, who had no business being there in the first place.

"What... what were they trying to make you think?" Sunset asked, recovering before the older mare.

"See, that's where it gets weird. Whoever tried to control me wanted me to think that you are beautiful. Which is ridiculous." Torque said, deliberately pausing there for the reaction he knew he'd get out of her.

"I-I-I- what? HOW DARE YOU SAY IT'S RIDICULOUS THAT YOU MIGHT THINK I'M BEAUTIFUL!" Sunset bellowed at him. But unlike literally every other pony, Torque cower before the terrible presence that was a slightly upset Sunset Shimmer. Instead he rolled his eyes.

"I mean it's objective fact that you're beautiful. Don't look at me like that. I am not complimenting you. It's probably best that you're not on magazine covers. I can only guess at how many fillies might commit suicide out of despair from ever looking like you. But your beauty is probably the catalyst for the awful things you're known to do, so to me it's kind of tainted and almost painful to look at. Now, back to b-"

"WAIT! STOP! YOU CAN'T DO THAT! YOU CAN'T SAY THINGS LIKE THAT TO ME AND NOT- A-AND JUST STOP LIKE THAT!" Sunset was... not calming down. If anything, she seemed to wind herself further with every word.

"Sunset, I think your caps lock might be stuck, Honey." Torque said, forging a new smile, this one tight with nervousness and strained tolerance for the redhead's belligerence.

"DON'T CALL ME 'HONEY', YOU STUPID JERK! YOU RUINED TODAY FOR ME! AND THEN YOU HAD THE GALL TO TRY TO EMOTIONALLY MANIPULATE ME INTO FORGIVING YOU BUT OHHH! I'M ONTO YOU MISTER!"

"Believe me, I've noticed." Torque replied, pushing the approaching-legal filly off of him. "Anyway, the day is not ruined. All we need is for you to stop screaming at me so I can find out who tried to force me to fall in love with you and we can finish the ceremony and look forward to putting this whole mess behind us!"

Next Chapter: The Big Mystery Estimated time remaining: 9 Minutes
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