Iclyn was full of shock — she had just witnessed a suicide attempt by the one she loved. Gladly, it didn't go far and she arrived in time to stop it and bring Sirius back to his senses. She didn't want to think about what would happen if she stayed for just five minutes longer. She shuddered from the thought.

At that moment, she gently stroked Sirius' back with her wing as he lay on the bed resting. His eyes were closed but he wasn't asleep. He enjoyed the comfort his friend provided, all the while thinking.

"I'm... I'm sorry." he said, his voice muffled slightly as he pressed his muzzle against a pillow.

Iclyn was silent and didn't cease her ministrations. She wanted to make sure he felt relaxed and comfortable.

"I don't deserve you." Sirius continued.

"Don't you say that!" Iclyn paused for a moment. "Everyone deserves love."

"No, not everyone." the former human argued quietly. "There are many... They don't want comfort. They want violence. Kill, plunder, leave nothing but ashes."

"Nothing like you're saying happened here for centuries."

"I already became the one to kill."

"But you didn't want to do it. You did it because you thought something terrible happened to me. You don't want to rape or torture. Sirius, you shouldn't hate yourself." Iclyn sighed. "You're a nice guy, really. Just... I guess you don't tolerate bullshit, you know? That time when you fought the bullies, they wanted to hurt you. Other than that, you've not hurt anyone but the changelings, and you certainly haven't hurt anyone that didn't deserve it."

"I remember how I choked you. Why do you defend me?" Sirius asked, turning his head to look at Iclyn. He still failed to understand why she wasn't beating him up at that moment. He wished she punched him, made him a bloody mess. Somehow, he thought it would make him feel better.

"You didn't trust me. You thought I was an enemy." Iclyn countered. "Sirius, I forgave you. The past is the past, and we all make mistakes at one point or another. You shouldn't be beating yourself for what was forgiven and forgotten."

"...Maybe you're right." Sirius replied with uncertainty. "I guess... I'm just too sensitive for my own good."

"No, you're not." Iclyn shook her head. "You just bottle up emotions for far too long. However, it's not your fault."

Sirius stayed silent. He realized Iclyn was right about him. He kept all his emotions suppressed, and it was what made him so explosive. He just needed to let it all out.

He began to cry, his body shaking. He began to sob loudly and without restraint. It wasn't the display of weakness, he realized. It was the display of his better side he kept hidden for years. In a sense, he was still a little boy that was afraid of the world around him, afraid of what it could do to him.

A few memories resurfaced in his head. A long time ago, he had his parents to rely on. Then, only his mother. Later, the one he loved. And then, no one. For the last years of his first life, he had no one to rely on, and it left him scarred far deeply than any physical wound could ever do.

"Don't be afraid, let it all out." the pegasus filly encouraged him while still comforting him.

Without anyone to support him and tell him kind words, Sirius slowly turned into an aggressive, hateful version of himself. He became what he hated, and it drove him insane and mad. His aggression led him to problems that deepened his depression and suicidal tendencies. When he broke loose, he went on a rampage. Once it ended, he ended himself.

Sirius didn't even know what other people thought of his last action. They were probably glad he was gone. He didn't want to think about it.

In his second life, he had only himself to rely on at the beginning. Even after he was found and brought to the castle where the princesses watched over him, he was still alone. He wanted to forget what he was, and thus he changed his name. However, nothing else changed. He was still himself, his issues were still there, and they were unsolved.

After he was sent to school, he met Iclyn. An unlikely bond grew and turned into what was happening between them in the mansion. Finally, he had the support he so desperately needed.

Sirius wasn't sure about his relationship with Iclyn, however. He didn't want to admit it but she was more than a friend to him. He was almost sure it was love. But was it? He wanted to do nice things for her. Just lie on the bed and hug, sharing warmth. Maybe make a gift and present it to her. Indeed, he wanted to do something nice for her.

However, he didn't want to hurt her and thus didn't want their relationship to grow further into more physical, intimate contact. What if she didn't like him in bed if it ever happened? And even if they did it, what if she became pregnant? What if something changed between them?

Sirius didn't want to put her through the pain of pregnancy and giving birth. Though, he wouldn't, and not just because he didn't want to.

He sighed deeply. Suddenly, he felt Iclyn's hooves on his back. He flinched as if he was hit.

"What are you doing?" he asked, quickly turning his head to her.

"My great-grandma always had problems with her back. To help her, I learned how to make massages." Iclyn explained. "I'm no earth pony, but I think you'll like it. Relax and let me do everything. Trust me, you'll feel better."

Sirius was silent for a couple of moments and Iclyn wasn't moving, waiting for his response. At first, he wanted to stop it, to tell her that she shouldn't have done it. However, he wanted to put more trust into Iclyn. He hesitated, but nodded. He gave it a chance.

Iclyn started moving slowly, using her hooves to knead his tense muscles. She felt how much he needed rest. It seemed like he was ready to jump into a fight even while seemingly relaxing. The filly wanted to make him feel safe and secure.

As time passed, Sirius began to relax, the tension in his muscles going away. He even smiled slightly, enjoying the sensation.

Iclyn moved down his body, and soon came to his backside. As soon as she touched his flanks, Sirius flinched and opened his eyes wide. Startled, Iclyn jumped away from him.

"What are you doing?" Sirius quietly demanded to know. He slowly craned his neck and looked at Iclyn. Then he repeated the question again: "What are you doing?"

"W-what is wrong?" Iclyn asked. She didn't like his tone, it induced... fear.

The former human stood up from the bed. He didn't feel so relaxed anymore. He needed a shower.

Without saying anything, he limped out of the bedroom, leaving Iclyn scared and confused. What did she do? She couldn't understand why Sirius reacted in such a strange and scary way.

Princess Celestia was heading to Sirius' mansion. She wanted to check on him and see how well he was doing in his new house. She also wanted to talk to him about the invasion he stopped and especially Chrysalis.

The solar alicorn had a chance to visit the changeling queen. She was furious over the loss of her horn, and it was found out that it couldn't be reconstructed. Its core was too damaged, and an ugly stump was left in the place of a once majestic horn. Chrysalis didn't fear to state that she wanted to murder Sirius in the worst possible way there was.

Celestia shuddered from the thought. The venom in Chrysalis' voice was too much for the alicorn to handle. She left the queen in her cell shortly afterwards.

Truly, the daylight princess never liked violence, especially its brutal side. That was why she always tried to peacefully solve any problems there could be in Equestria. Most of the times, it worked well. However, the villains she had previously banished or imprisoned were coming back, and Celestia wasn't sure she would be able to handle them alone or even with her sister. The hope lay on the six bearers of the Elements of Harmony.

Or on brutal ways of murder as Sirius demonstrated. Celestia knew he was one strange being with mind she couldn't quite understand, but it was obvious he didn't hesitate to kill. During his duel with Chrysalis, Celestia could see bloodlust in his hate-filled eyes, and it scared her. He hadn't hurt anyone outside of those who deserved it and this way the princess couldn't do anything about him other than follow the laws and reward him in the hope that he wouldn't turn against her ponies.

Celestia was a powerful alicorn but even she feared what Sirius could do. He was physically below an average unicorn of his age, but mentally and skillfully he surpassed most. He wasn't a great magic user but he had other no less effective ways and methods to harm or protect others.

Soon, the mansion came into view, and Celestia couldn't wait to see Sirius again. She cared about all ponies and she could see he needed support especially after the traumatic events of the invasion. However, she must make sure she wouldn't be too intrusive as not to antagonize him.

The carriage stopped at the gates. Some words were exchanged, and the princess had to wait for a few minutes. Then the gates opened, allowing the carriage to drive inside.

Frankly, Celestia was nervous but didn't show it. To most ponies, Sirius was a hero of Equestria, and the princess didn't want to do anything bad to him. In truth, she was just as thankful for what he did as other ponies were. She just didn't like the methods.

In a few moments, the princess finally disembarked.

"Sir Sirius is waiting for you inside, your majesty." Flora said, bowing.

"Thank you." Celestia smiled at the elderly mare.

The princess went straight to the main building. She ordered her guards to stay outside — it was a private visit, and she believed she wouldn't need additional security. First of all, she didn't come there looking for a fight. Second, Sirius was skillful enough to be able to handle her guards easily if he wanted to. She remembered he had a miniature version of a cannon that packed quite a punch. Very few knew about it besides the royal sisters.

As soon as Celestia entered, she looked around. She didn't know what she expected, but everything looked like when she evicted Blueblood Senior from the mansion. There wasn't an army of servants, and most of rich and excessive decorations were gone, leaving the simplicity and homely feeling the mansion was designed for.

Celestia liked Sirius hadn't changed anything yet.

She went forward right into the living room. The only glowing light came from there, and she suspected him waiting for her right in that room.

And she was right. As soon as she entered the room, she saw Sirius. He was sitting at the head of the table. Most chairs were close to the table, and only one was currently far enough from it to be sat on. The said chair was across Sirius.

"Welcome, your majesty." Sirius said, his voice mostly emotionless. He didn't have anger or fear towards the princess, he just acknowledged her presence. "Take a seat, please. Would you like tea?"

"Good day, Sirius." Celestia nodded, walking to the chair. "If it isn't too much to ask, I would indeed like some tea."

Sirius nodded, and a cup of tea along with a small plate under it was levitated to her end of table. The tea was still hot, steam coming off of it.

Celestia took her place and then sipped the tea. It was regular black tea. Unsurprising — Sirius didn't expect her and she doubted he even knew about different sorts of tea.

She took in his features. In the dim light of the room, even the sun from the outside didn't provide much. Sirius' face was mostly hidden in shadows, leaving his eyes glistening in the soft light. In them, Celestia saw neutrality and indifference. Though, it could be clearly seen that Sirius would like her to leave. The princess also noticed a white strand in his mane — the sign of experiencing too much stress in the short amount of time. Frankly, Celestia had no questions regarding how he got it.

The last thing she noticed were his weapons. Both his blades were placed near his chair, and the pouch was opened slightly, revealing the metal inside.

"You wanted to see me." Sirius more stated than asked. "Why?"

"I just wanted to see how well you're doing, Sirius." Celestia said honestly. "Do you like the mansion?"

"Yes, I do." he nodded slightly, keeping his eyes locked onto hers. His gaze was neutral and yet heavy. "It is nice."

"I'm glad to hear that." the princess smiled slightly. "How have you been?"

"Somewhat." Sirius waved his hoof. "I now have a permanent limp, new scars, but... Everything is going more or less fine." he admitted honestly. "There is one thing I want to know... The invasion, how did it happen?"

"Well..." Celestia cleared her throat. "I... I must admit it was partly my fault."

Sirius frowned slightly, but then his expression returned to neutral. His eyes expressed nothing.

"How?" was his simple question.

"Changelings can take the appearance of another pony." Celestia explained. "The bride was replaced by no other than Chrysalis herself. I noticed that she was acting weirdly but chalked it up to pre-wedding stress. Then, my student told me that Cadance was indeed strange, but I became angry at her — at that time, I still thought the bride was just stressed about the wedding.

"As I found later, I was wrong, I should've listened to my senses and my faithful student. But it was too late. Chrysalis revealed herself. I tried to fight her, but she managed to see my attack coming. She was feeding on the groom's love, and his love was so great it overpowered my magic. From that point, I could do nothing, unfortunately."

Sirius' eye twitched slightly. Was it because of her that he was forced to be a cripple for the rest of his life? He felt his anger rising.

"Your majesty..." he said, some anger seeping into his voice. "I can say one thing — if not your... dismiss, I might have not become this." he stood up and limped towards Celestia, only stopping halfway to glare at her. "This is permanent, princess. It can't be fixed." he inhaled deeply, controlling his urge to hurt the princess. "I don't want to see you in this mansion. You know I have the means to ensure my safety." He returned to his place, and then placed the pouch on the table. "Do not come near me. This mansion, money... It won't heal my leg." he glared at the princess once again. "I ask kindly... Don't come near me. Sit in your castle, rule. You are fine ruler. Better than most if not all that I've seen. But I don't want to see you."

"I understand." Celestia nodded, her smile gone and replaced with the apologetic look. "I'm sorry, truly."

"Words can't heal body." Sirius replied. "Sorry isn't enough to cure. It never is."

Celestia couldn't disagree with him. In truth, she realized it was directly her fault Sirius was hurt so much. If she had just listened to her own students and her senses, everything would be evaded.

Even for a centuries-old and wise ruler, she still made mistakes others had to pay for. Just like with her own sister...

"I hope everything goes well for you, Sirius." she said before leaving.

The former human didn't reply and just glared at her. No words would ever return proper functioning to his leg.