As the door creaked shut behind us, I kept my back to the three mares and stallion in my room. Rather, I strode over to the bed, then turned and sat down, looking at each of them in turn, before returning my look to the earth ponies among them.

“Well, let me have it, Applejack.”

I watched her jaw set and then she shook her head “Ah won’t lie, Shane, ah was madder than a hornet in a bonnet the ride up here after ah got Twilight's letter. But, havin' listened to what happened... well, shoot.”

She reached up and took off her stetson, bringing it down to her chest. “Sugarcube, you did what ya had to. That snake dun hit a mare, and that ain’t right. Now, I ain’t sayin' what you said to him was right, but ah stand by you on this, and ah think ah can speak for everypony here.”

I noted nods from each of them, and Cortland spoke up. I shifted my gaze over to the stallion with the white shield holding five apples in a cross on it as a cutie mark.

“Shane, ah know Dusty thanks you, so does her husband.”

I lifted an eyebrow at that. I didn’t know she was married. It had not come up in conversation with her.

“Shane, I can’t say what is going to happen. Although, I can tell you this. The guards are all on your side on this. So is the whole staff, and I suspect the princess knows that,” Golden spoke.

I gave her a nod and looked back to the purple alicorn in the room. “Twilight, why did you say yes? Will you really be forced to accept the same punishment as I receive if I am found guilty?”

She inhaled, then sighed out and nodded. “Yes, and I did it, Shane, because I know you are in the right," placing her right hoof up on my knee lightly. “But, we are going to have a long talk about your choice of words,” she then pointed at me with her hoof.

Applejack and Cortland both chuckled, while Golden was just blushing hard. AJ tucked her hat back on her head. “Ah can’t believe you called that sidewider that to his face.”

Twilight turned and tossed a look at the apple mare. “Applejack, don’t encourage him! He has a dirty, dirty mouth.”

I shrugged and looked out the window. “We used to have a swear jar. Any time I cursed, well, I had to put a dollar in it. The money was going to go to Cassie’s school fund,” I smiled a bit. “At the end, there was almost a thousand dollars in it.”

Everyone—pony, I would get that stuck in my head at some point. Well, they started to laugh, other than Twilight, who just gave an equine snort and frowned. “It isn’t funny.”

We chatted and bantered back and forth for a hour before a knock on the door. Twilight opened it with that soft purple glow I had come to associate with her magic. A guard stood before it and dipped his head.

“Princess, I was sent to ask if you wish lunch brought to the room?”

She looked back at us, and I think we all nodded. I responded, just because this was not our usual method of getting a meal. “Remind the kitchen that I cannot have hay or unprocessed grains.”

He nodded. “Yes, sir. I will also remind them you don’t care for anything... blue.” before he turned and walked off. Twilight closed the door and glanced back at me. I of course had a smile, that subtle comment by the guard spoke worlds to me.

Golden, who was sitting next to me, grinned. “Told you.”

Lunch came a half hour later, salads for the ponies, and one for me that had bits of what looked and tasted like tuna fish in it. AJ brought out four bottles of Sweet Apple Acres cider from her saddle bags. Overall, not a bad meal considering I was effectively under arrest right now. I had to admit, with all the fiber and low protein diet here, I had become quite... regular.

I had taken note of something that the others had more than likely not picked up on. Cortland sat closer to Golden than usual, and I had caught his looks, his smiles when she spoke. I knew that look, it was the same way I looked at Shawna back when we first began to date. That was the look of a guy—a stallion, rather—falling in love. Good for them, they made a cute couple. I wonder if she knew he was into her?

I pondered on that as everyone around me sat, engaged in conversation. Here I was, the only human in a world of talking animals. Were they really animals by that definition? They were the dominate species here, and other than a basic body shape, they didn’t share anything in common with the animals back home. Where did that leave me? I wasn’t a citizen, was I even considered protected under the laws that protected all sapient life?

There was quite a lot to think about on this subject. After all, I had, without knowing, broken the law here. Sure, I would do it again in a heartbeat, that horse’s ass deserved what he got for hitting Dusty. Although, in doing so, I had started what could be considered a major incident. My old captain would be chewing my ass right now with one sentence and commending me with the next only to go back to chewing again.

Another knock on the door brought me out of my thought and I blinked. Looking up as once more Twilight opened the door, I took note of how Golden and Cortland stood and moved just enough to be between me and any possible threat. Even now they took their jobs seriously and I admired that.

The guard at the door gave a nod. “Pardon me, Princess Twilight, but, her majesty, Princess Celestia, would like the Element of Honesty to accompany her.”

Twilight looked back over her shoulder at the orange mare. “Applejack, by law, you do not have to go. But, it is your call."

She looked at me, then picked her hat up and put it on her head. “Well, ah figure if the princess needs to talk to me, then it’s my duty to see to that. Shane, you ain’t got a problem with it, do you, sugarcube?”

I shook my head. “Go, she wouldn’t be asking for you if it wasn’t of any import.”

She gave me a nod back and headed past Twilight, pausing to give her purple friend a nuzzle that was returned in kind. I again smiled some, it was comforting to see the kind of friendships the show had given us, were real here, as tight as could be.

---

Another lengthy four hours later, a third knock on the door came. This time there stood six of the guard, three of the Lunar and three of the Solar. I gave a nod as I stood up and scanned over at the matching pairs of earth, unicorn, and pegasus ponies in contrasting blue and gold armor respectively.

One up front, a unicorn day guard spoke. “Shane McDonald, Princess Twilight Sparkle, we are here to escort you back to court. Her Majesty is ready to hand down her judgement,” he paused briefly, then resumed. “Sergeant Cortland Apple and Private Golden Shield are asked to stand at your side and will walk with you.”

I glanced at Twilight. “Applejack isn’t back yet.”

She looked up at me and laid her ears down. “I am sure she is there already. Come on, Shane, let's get this over with.”

I nodded and looked back at the group of guards. “Thank you for the escort, gentlemen…”

Twilight cut me off to correct. “Gentleponies.”

I rolled my eyes and nodded. “All right, let’s do this.”

---

Once more walking down the carpet, this time I had two ponies behind me, and a princess at my side. I took note of the fact Luna stood next to her sister, both observing as we approached. I spotted AJ, who was standing at the bottom step of the diaz, and looking quite the frown-wearing mare.

Coming to a stop, we bowed together, I myself taking a knee once more, it just seemed the right thing to do and that was what all the movies and TV shows all the guys doing. This received a mixed reaction, a few incoherent murmurs coming from the many gathered ponies in the gallery. I spotted Celestia nod her head, and Luna offer an impressed smirk.

“Rise my ponies, and human. The Solar Court is back in session. Please let the record show that we are attended by my sister, Princess Luna, and Prince Blueblood.”

I didn’t dare to look around, but by the snort I heard from behind me and to my right, near the gallery, I suspected I knew where he was. Rising up I faced the alabaster alicorn and her sister.

“Princess Twilight Sparkle, I have been asked to bring a challenge forward. A pony has approached us to claim right of advocacy for the human.”

I blinked and glanced down at the purple alicorn who looked quite perplexed. She shot a look right up at me and gave me a ‘stay quiet’ look, before turning her head back to Celestia.

“What would the basis of this challenge be, Princess Celestia?”

Oh, I hate that smile, that damn mare. She is still playing a game she owned, invented the rules to, and was the world champion of. I could see it on her face as she looked back at her former student.

“On the basis that despite the laurels of princesshood. You, yourself, are not a landowner, Twilight Sparkle.’

“Who dares challenge me now at the end of this trial?” Whoops, someone was furious.

Luna stayed quiet, but her eye twitched, I saw that, she knew what was up. Celestia dipped her head a bit. “The house of Apple has spoken. Lady Applejack Apple has laid claim to the right to advocate for the human.”

I blinked, and Twilight, bless her heart, sputtered and gave a cough. “Lady!”

Behind us, the gallery exploded in gasps and conversation. From just to my right, I heard an arrogant voice bark out. “Preposterous, that dirty farmer is not a noble!”

Oh, that voice, I know that voice. My head snapped in his direction and I glared daggers at the haughty white unicorn just long enough to make him take a step back. I suspect he thought I would charge him again.

A heavy hoof banged on the floor, and a deep voice spoke. Luna projected, but not quite the royal voice, thankfully.

“Prince Blueblood, you will remember thy place! The Apple family holds one of the oldest and largest land grants in Equestria. By the right of land ownership, and being the oldest female sibling in presence here. Lady Applejack Apple is very much a noble in good standing!”

Celestia looked down at Applejack and gave a soft smile. “Lady Applejack, the house of Blueblood has broken protocol. Do you wish to receive repentance from his house?”

Shaking her head I saw her reach up and take her hat off. “Shucks, no, ma’am. Ah reckon that ah can let that slip,” her head turned to look at the prince. “Once,” the warning clear and grim in her tone. I had to give the mare credit, she seemed to know a few of the rules to the game, too. I started to suspect she had a white and dark blue set of coaches to thank for that.

Looking back to Twilight once more, I watched AJ put her hat back on. “Also, ah would like it if y’all quit callin' me Lady, ah ain’t no 'Canterlot Noble'.”

I spun my head around when a snort came from Blueblood and I glared a second time at him, almost daring the son of a bitch to mouth off. He however seemed to have enough brains to know better. Turning back to the events at hand, I spoke up.

“Don’t I get a—”

I was cut off by three princesses, two Apples, and a shield all speaking at the same moment. “No!”

All right, then. I clamped my mouth shut again.

Twilight seemed to think for a time before she dipped her head. “In light of the challenger being a landowner, I will step down and make way for her.”

Leaving my side, she moved over to face Applejack, looking eye to eye with her friend and fellow Element.

“Lady Applejack Apple of the Apple Family. Do you accept the responsibility to stand at the accused side, knowing you will bear the weight of his guilt should he be found such?”

Applejack give a nod. Her green country girl eyes glimmered a bit. That mare really was as honest as the day was long and it wasn’t just skin deep. That kind of honesty went right down to the bone.

“Ah sure do, sugarcube,” causing a few chuckles among the elite in the gallery.

Twilight gave a nod at that and leaned in, whispering something to her that I could not hear. Although, whatever it was made the apple mare blush for a moment and nod. Twilight then walked up to the throne with her cutie mark on it and stood before it at her fellow princesses side.

Applejack walked over, her work-worn, toughened hooves ringing on the floor every step, an audible reminder she was an earth pony to her core. Celestia looked around, then nodded, turning her head to look at me.

“Shane McDonald of the humans, you stand accused of one count, crimes against the crown. One count of assault on a pony, and several counts of verbal assault. You have had your word weighed along side of the words of your peers and your accuser. I ask, how do you plead before I pass judgement?”

I glanced down at Applejack, who gave a nod of her head and I leaned down. She whispered to me, “You do what is right, sugarcube, you do what is honest, and the Apple clan stands behind you.”

I glanced behind me to see both Cortland and Golden nod. What I didn’t see was the smile shared between Celestia and Luna.

Turning back to look up at the three princesses watching me. I dipped my head in a bow. “I do not deny the charges, Princess Celestia. Facts behind them or not, I did strike the prince and I did... use a few off-color words. So, I will save the court time, I plead guilty.”

Exhaling, I had just laid all my trust in the orange mare beside me. There was a part of me that was honored she would put her name, her families name, behind me like that.

“Very well,” Celestia spoke, then continued after tapping her hoof three times on the marble floor. “On the counts of crime against the crown and assault we find you, not guilty,” pausing only because the gallery once more erupted into whispers and gasps. Of course, one pony decided he needed to show his colors once more.

“Aunty, I must object! I—”

Again, the hoof came down, but this time it was Celestia herself. “Prince Blueblood the Eighteenth, Scion of the Blueblood family. You will hold your tongue in my court, am I clear?”

I did glance over and watch his jaw snap shut. I gave him a little smirk and a wink, that seemed to just make him even more furious, and his hate was clearly aimed in my general direction. Well, better me than Applejack, or another pony.

Looking back to Celestia just as her head turned back to look at me.

“On the count of verbal assault, the Solar Court finds you guilty. However, we find extenuating circumstances around the events. Therefor, the court will issue this punishment.”

I stood up a little taller, as if I was going to be punished. I was going to take it like a man and show this group of ponies I accepted my actions.

“One, here and now, you will stand before the court and the Gallery of Nobles. You will be given a bar of soap. You will put this bar in your mouth for no less than the span of five minutes.”

I blinked, she was going to wash my mouth out with soap? All right, perhaps this wasn’t too bad.

“Two, you are remanded to the care of the house of Apple. You owe them the sum of one thousand bits, having paid your fine in full. As you have no job or source of money at this time, I am made to understand the Apple family will provide you with room and board, for the span of three months, as you work off your debt to them, and pony society.”

Hard labor, I knew things were going too well. Okay, I can do this, fair is fair and it would get me out of the castle and out in the open air once more.

“Third and last, you are to continue your reports to me on the state of law enforcement among humans, as well as submitting to me a friendship report once a week...”

Celestia was cut off by a little squee from her right, where the smaller purple alicorn had a big wide grin on her face and was hopping hoof to hoof. Luna did an admirable job of covering her mouth with her own hoof to hide the chuckle she let off.

Continuing on but with that all knowing warm smile on her face now. “You will continue to travel to Canterlot two times a month and speak to my sister and I about human history, and you will continue three times a week to have a two hour meeting with Princess Twilight.”

Friendship report? I had to send her a friendship report, really? I would have told her to fuck off, but, all things considered, I was still not doing terribly here. Best to just go with the flow right now. I dipped my head and spoke.

“The court has been fair, I will submit to this judgement and do my best.”

Once more, the sun princess gave a nod.

“Very well. The Solar Court is in recess,” her hoof tapped the floor three times.