"Hey, Yang?"

"Yes, Gilda?" I was chopping vegetables, so I suspected it would be something important. It seemed to be a trend.

"There's a mare that wants to speak with you. She said her name was Searing Victory. Red unicorn. Did she work here?"

I was glad I'd set the knife down since I almost went straight to panic mode and would have bent it out of shape. "Right. I. . . I'll be out there in a moment."

"Uh huh. She's by the entrance."

When Gilda left, I took a few slow breaths. "It'll be fine. It'll be fine. I only forgot about her for. . . almost four whole months. How could that happen? Did someone erase my memories of. . . No, I clearly remember her knocking me into the dirt. May as well face her and get it over with." Once I was ready, I left the kitchen and saw Searing Victory in the foyer, though she seemed a bit different, like she had seen things. "Searing, I. . ."

"Don't worry, Yang," Searing said. "I forgive you."

That surprised me. "I'm confused. Let's talk in the office." I led the way into the room and we sat down on opposite sides of the desk. "Okay, what happened?"

"I caught a very rare magical disease that made me almost unnoticeable."

"And how did you find out about. . . I'm still confused."

"It's quite simple, my dear Yang." Discord snaked up out of her spiky mane. "She caught the last ever case of BPS."

"No idea what that means. What are you doing here?"

"Exposition. You may want to listen."

I sat back and prepared for a headache of a story. "Go ahead."

Searing started on her story. "It started shortly after that attack by the armored diamond dogs and red dragon. . ."

Searing woke up in her home, and something about her felt. . . Different. Oh, she felt fine. No muscle aches, belly aches, headaches, or hornaches. Her magic worked fine, her vision and hearing were sharp, she could (and did) smell fine, and she wanted breakfast as usual.

As she went about her routine, she couldn't help but start to feel more and more disturbed by the different feeling she felt. Throughout her morning workout, shower, and breakfast, it kept nagging at the back of her mind, and she couldn't figure out what it was.

In town, the irritation of the odd feeling kept getting at her. On top of that, everypony seemed to be acting a bit different around her. They acted like she wasn't quite there. They were all polite as usual when close to her, saying 'excuse me' as they passed close by, but that was about it. More and more, she felt like she was out of place, which was saying something since nopony was batting an eye at Discord riding an air bicycle slowly in reverse while quickly pedalling forward.

Searing's interactions with the ponies at the stalls in the market were not good either. They all seemed to forget about her as soon as they started to take care of her requests. A small custom sundae that usually took less than a minute took five minutes to get, mostly consisting of Searing reminding the mare that she existed.

After that tiring ordeal, she lay down on the edge of a fountain with her treat. Nopony seemed to notice her. Even the stallions and a few mares that would look at her as she passed seemed to not notice her, despite her being in excellent shape.

She'd just finished the sundae and threw the trash away when someone noticed her. "Well well well, look who's feeling all lonely and forgotten," Discord said as he slid into her sight.

"What do you want, Discord?" Searing tiredly asked. "I'm not having a good day."

"What do I want? Now isn't that the question of the century? What if I told you that I know why nopony's noticing you?"

". . . Go on."

"You have a very. Very. VERY. Rare magical disease that has almost no documentation: Background Pony Syndrome."

"Get to the point."

"Feisty. Basically, you just kind of fade into the background. Tell me, do you notice every single instance of trees rustling in the wind?"

Searing was suddenly aware of the trees around her gently rustling in the wind. "Well. . . No."

"It just fades into the background, and that's what BPS does to you." Discord disappeared and was suddenly lounging along Searing's back and neck. "You just fade into the background."

"Then what?"

"You want the details? Or should I cut straight to my cure for it?"

"Tell me about the cure."

"Details it is!" Discord snickered at Searing's unhappy groan. "Long, long, loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong ago, ponies were not as colorful as they are now. It was much more common then, and was one cause of ponies just disappearing. Because of how few colors they had, it wasn't as easy to notice if one pony in particular was missing. Then colors started happening, and it became much less of a problem because in a world of tan and brown ponies, a blue one is hard to miss."

"Get to the cure already."

"Fine fine. But I warn you, it's going to be a bit. . . Chaotic." Searing suddenly found herself sitting in a comfy chair (the same kind that the unexpected Equish Inquisition used, not that she knew). On the other side of the desk in front of her was Discord dressed up as a doctor looking at a clipboard. On the desk itself were a variety of travel brochures. "I can make you the last ever case of BPS and cure you, but you'll need to take a little trip. Time and space may not make sense while it happens. As your travel advisor and doctor, I prescribe taking the Crayxamaxyarc trip package."

"Is that even a word?"

"Spirit of chaos, my dear. Our first stop will be a local attraction: Ghastly Gorge!" With a snap, they disappeared and were in an opening in the wall of the gorge. "Ta-da!"

Searing looked down into the deep, black abyss. "Has it always been this deep?"

"When a huge weather machine rises from here, it kind of has. It also just so happened to conveniently open up this deep underground science bunker OF SCIENCE! Miraculously unscorched. Anyways, toodles, gotta go finish organizing some chaos things. I'll be back in a week."

"What will I eat?"

"There's a fully stocked fridge and the water is perfectly safe. Don't worry, it's all fresh. Ciao~" With a snap, Discord disappeared.

Searing sighed and went inside. "Well, not like I've got anything better to do."

"Did you find anything cool in there?" I asked, interrupting the story.

"As a matter of fact, I did," Searing said. "But I'm not going to show it to you just yet. Anyways, that week was rather lonely and boring. It was when Discord showed back up that things got weirder. . ."

Searing woke up to the sound of what sounded like knocking, only a couple hours after she'd gone to sleep. "I'm on my way," she groggily said as she, on wobbly legs, followed the knocking and opened the fridge door. "Can I help you?"

"On the contrary, my dear," Discord said as he stepped out of the appliance, then looked around. "Looks like someone had a party last night."

Searing glanced over the many empty bottles across what she had been using as a kitchen counter. "Only a *hic* a little bit. Loneliness. . . It gets to yuh."

"And as soon as you sober up, we will go to our next destination."

"Awrite." Searing fell over and fell asleep on the kitchen floor right in front of Discord.

"Or maybe I could bring you there now." Discord picked up a kitchen knife, poked the air a bit, then filleted a portal to his target destination. After seasoning it to chaotic taste, he picked up the passed out unicorn and simply walked through.

"Wake up, Searing~" Discord gently said.

"No," Searing drowsily stated as she pulled the pillow against her face.

"Hmph. Seems I have to take more drastic measures." He snapped, but nothing seemed to happen. Satisfied, he grabbed the blankets and yanked them off the bed, revealing the humanized Searing Victory, wearing some light sleepwear.

"Yeeeee!" Searing immediately curled up, wide awake and feeling a chill on her skin.

Discord, also human and wearing a tastefully mismatched set of clothes, put a pair of earplugs in, followed by earmuffs, and sat down on the ceiling. While the room was soundproofed, he would need to wait out the freakout.

When it appeared that Searing was on the brink of calming down, Discord, staying on the ceiling, walked over to her. "That behavior is very unbecoming of a young lady such as yourself."

"Why do I look. . . not quite like Yang?"

"It's just part of the trip, my dear. You still have Background Pony Syndrome, but you're not a pony now, so you should be able to interact like normal with people. Of course, you need to learn how to walk first, and you'd better learn fast."

"Alright, alright." Searing rolled out of bed and landed on the floor. "Ow! Why are these things on my chest so big?"

"They're the same size as Yang's would be if she appeared here instead of Equestria. In fact, you've been blessed with the same figure as her. 6'3" tall, excellent physical shape, and an excellent physical shape. Anyways, to your feet, soldier!"

Searing tried standing, but couldn't find her balance and fell on her back. "How do you stand on only two legs?"

"A better question would be how minotaurs don't fall over on two hooves, but who am I to judge?" Discord watched Searing try and fail to stand a few more times before making an offer. "Would you like some help?"

"No." Searing fell on her chest again. "Owwwww. . . Okay, yes."

"Excellent." Discord smacked her head with a foam sledgehammer. "There we go."

Searing stood up and shot him a glare. "You think that works?"

Discord slid around the ceiling, the former unicorn chasing him around for a minute. "You know, I think it does work."

She stopped and looked around, then started testing her legs. "Your teaching method needs work."

"Hmmm, nah. On a side note-" he flung a bundle of fabric at her. "You need to get dressed for school."

Searing's breath caught in her throat. "School?"

"Are you afraid of a little edumication?" The chaos god taunted.

"Well. . . Um. . ."

"Dark and troubled past with staff that acted with questionable ethics and legality?"

"Ifellasleepallthetimeinschool." Searing's bright red skin easily hid the bright red blush on her face. "Or I got in fights. Sometimes both."

"Is that all? Well, I'm sure a good breakfast will help with that. Go shower up and I'll get started on it." Discord flipped over to the floor, walked through the wall next to the open door like a ghost, and whistled a merry tune. "Oh, you have plenty of time before you have to leave! Three hours! I need to go over some stuff with you too!"

"Alright alright!" Searing found her way to the bathroom and was soon in the shower.

I gave Searing a questioning look when she stopped talking. "So, how was that first shower as a human?"

"I. . . Don't want to talk about it," Searing nearly stammered out.

"Something about the dexterity of fingers or-"

"Okay, moving on."

Discord held up a phone. "I have a recording of the sounds she-"

"OKAY! MOVING ON!"

"-and those are the common wonders you'll see around here." Discord let the projector screen roll back into the curtains. There wasn't a projector, but that didn't matter. "Now for the cover story."

"Can't I just make something up?" Searing asked over her empty breakfast plate. The Carne Den was much better, but it would do for the time being.

"You are a transfer student from a land called England, and you came here because I, your dear old single dad, had to move due to work. I've already set everything up at the school you will be attending."

"You're not my father," Searing firmly stated.

"Now where did I say anything about that? I'm your dad, not your father. Anyways, you grew up in the English countryside away from a lot of technology because you were a flower child or something like that, and I accommodated as best I could, complete with private tutors. As a result, you're somewhat technologically stunted, but we'll get that fixed soon enough."

"With what? Another foam hammer?"

"Pfsh. Don't be silly. No, you're going out there and seeing it for yourself." He hoisted a backpack onto the table, the impact shaking everything on it. "I'll take you to the school. It's only a mile from here, so you can walk on your own easily enough once u kno da wey."

Searing took the hefty bag. "What's in here?"

"Textbooks, folders, paper, pencils, everything you'll need for your classes."

"It feels like there's a whole tree in here. Isn't this supposed to be a high tech place with those. . . phones and tablets and internets?"

"Progress on integrating that is a bit haphazard. But enough talking! Let's get walking."

The walk in the morning sun was peaceful, though Searing was on edge the whole time. Discord was going to do something chaotic at any moment, she was certain. The highly ordered alien surroundings, much more ordered than even pony cities she'd seen, most certainly did not contribute at all to her nerves.

"I bet you two walking together looked strange," I commented.

"It took me a week to realize that," Searing said. "No rumors, thankfully."

"You lucked out then. So, anything interesting happen there?"

A tall boy with dark blue skin, piercing yellow eyes, and smugness rolling off of him in waves was leaning against the wall. "Hey, new kid," he said with a baritone voice.

Searing stopped to look at him. "What do you want?"

"Want to be the president of the student council?"

"W-wait, just like that?" I asked. "When did that happen?"

"About two weeks in," Searing said. "And no, I did not develop a crush on him."

"She totally did for a week," Discord said.

"Discord!" It was then that I learned it was possible to see a blush through red fur, and it was kind of funny. "ANYWAYS, I won the debate and went through all the rules the student council had passed. It was a headache, even with his help."

"What was his name?" I asked.

"Midnight Stroll."

"So, you've got the rest of the student council turning against you for burning up their many, many rules," Midnight said. "The social studies teachers that support the student council don't seem too pleased either. They really want your head on a pike. And all that in the span of a month. Why did you do it?"

"Do you want the noble reason or the real reason?" Searing asked as she slumped over onto her desk.

"Give me both."

"More freedom for the students and less work for me."

Midnight put on his smug grin. "So what's the noble reason then?"

"Shut up. . . What about Principal Cinch?"

"Oh, I have heard that she is upset. Not livid, but we'll get her there soon enough. And when she gets there, we can play all the cards that are in your favor against her, then Dean Cadance can step in and then things will be much better."

Searing sat up and sighed. "Sometimes, I wonder which of us is the real president. What if this plan doesn't work?"

"Then we go out in a blaze of political glory. It's our last year here, we hold prestigious positions, and she is obsessed with image. We are perfectly safe."

"If you say so. How do people do this for a living?"

"Do you want the noble reason or the real reason?"

"Oh shut up, Midnight." With a tired groan, Searing stood up. "I'm going home."

"Want me to walk you there?"

"No thanks."

The walk home was perfectly normal. The weather was good, the birds were singing, traffic was low, and on the end of the second block from the school. . . There it was. Searing smiled as she walked up to the white waist high fence and the big friendly chocolate lab on the other side. "Hey there, Buddy!" She happily cooed as she started scratching the dog's head. "Oh, you are just mad today, aren't you?" The dog happily leaned into her scratching and petting. "Yes, you are absolutely furious, aren't you?"

"Good afternoon, Searing," the dog's owner said as he stepped out of the house.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Trender," Searing replied without stopping the stream of scratches for the very not upset dog. "How are you?"

"I got up this morning, so that's good," the old man said. "At my age, it's a blessing. How's the student council business going?"

"Oh, you know. . . The rest of the council doesn't like me, Midnight seems to have his own agenda, and most of the student body praises me."

"Sounds like you're doing something right."

"All I'm doing is getting rid of pointless, redundant, difficult, and stupid rules. Why would anyone get upset over that?"

"You're ripping power out of their hands. People in power love power. Take it away, and they will naturally object.”

Buddy started turning around and Searing kept up the friendly petting, going from the top of his head to his chin. “That makes sense. I know someone who went through something similar with some pon. . . people in high places. She had some friends in higher places, but that didn’t stop them from trying to get her.”

“Did they get her?”

“No, they didn't. I wonder how she's doing right now?"

Searing stopped her story. "Say, what's happened with the nobles? Did they, well, they didn't get you, but did they do anything?"

"They tried to frame me for mass foalnapping and burning down an orphanage," I answered. "And they almost got me, too. It was one little detail that they missed that was my saving grace."

"What was that detail?"

I expanded one Ember Celica and held my arm out. "Try and get it off with your magic."

"Pfsh. Easy." Searing lit her horn up and looked confident. A moment later, confusion came over her face. As she tried more and more to pull the gauntlet off, Discord, just under a foot tall, appeared on the desk to cheer her on. A minute later, she cut the glow, sweating and working to catch her breath. "What sorcery is this?"

"They're unaffected by magic. Turned out that everything they were accusing me of, they themselves did. Gold Leaf was the mastermind, and a lot of the others were in on it too. Twilight turned on the honesty magic and let me tell you, her declaration of their titles, wealth, power, and property being stripped was a sight to see."

Searing smiled at the short description. "Well, that's good to know."

I leaned back a bit in the chair. "One of the other ones realized what she had been doing and had a change of heart. Bloody Marey is now one of my business partners. The drinks we make from her mixes sell really well."

"What kind of drinks?"

I couldn't pass up the puntential. "Bloody Mareys."

"I know that. What's the drink called?"

"Bloody Marey."

"Not the bloody noble, the drink!"

"You've never heard of the Bloody Marey?" I saw Discord off to the side biting into a crispy chicken finger to keep himself from laughing.

"Look, Yang, I just want to know what Bloody Marey's drink is called."

"Bloody Marey?"

"Yes, her!"

I was starting to have a hard time holding my composure in the face of the comedy. "B-bloody Marey."

"What is her drink called?" Searing seemed to catch up to what was going on when a few snickers started to escape me. "Oh. It's like that one baseball skit Discord had me learn."

Discord ate the chicken finger and promptly started laughing. "Ohohohoho. . . That was good! I wonder if I can do that with other pony names?"

"We're going to have to do that skit sometime," I said after some laughter of my own. "I think it's been done here before, but who cares? It's good. Anyways, what else happened?"

"Well, I got some presents. . ."

Searing walked downstairs and saw the living room festively decorated. There was a tree, covered in lights and glittery things, topped with a star that looked like Princess Celestia's cutie mark. Garland ran around the room. Little Santa models were placed on numerous surfaces. There was a lit fireplace she could swear wasn't there the night before. Right outside, a snowstorm was raging.

Since she'd seen similar stuff around town for the last two months, Searing knew it was Christmas. "Discord!"

Discord popped his head out of the tree, a fake white beard on his face and a floppy red and white hat on his head. "Yes, Searing?"

"Did you do all this?"

The chaos spirit rolled his eyes. "So much for the magic of Christmas." He opened the tree like a door and stepped out, dressed like Santa. At the same time, a number of presents tumbled out. Most were badly wrapped while some were neatly wrapped, and Searing could swear that they landed to spell 'All yours'. "Go ahead and open them."

Searing grabbed one of the smaller ones and tore it open, letting the black and light blue item unfold in her grasp. "Really? A swimsuit at this time of year?"

Discord was smiling like a loon. "I know, right? It's perfect!"

"I guess I'll accept it." Searing folded it up, set it aside, and moved onto a smaller, more rigid gift. She carefully opened it and found a brand new phone, along with a case and stylus for it. "Oh, this is cool!"

"It has been bestowed with unlimited high speed data," Discord said in a sagely manner. "Can't say the same for the battery, though. Now, let's go over the. . ." Searing was sitting in a chair, looking over the instruction manual and not paying any attention to him. "You're not even interested in the rest of your presents, are you?"

"I'll get to them later." She got the phone into its case, emblazoned with her cutie mark, and turned it on. A smile came across her face as it came on, and she started playing with it. "Now, what to do. . ."

"Did you become a phone addict?" I asked.

"Maaaaybe just a bit?" Searing said. "I got better."

"Good for you. There are people where I'm from that never put their phones down. Ever. Not any friends of mine, but it wouldn't surprise me if those people didn't notice that they walked off a cliff until they hit the bottom."

"Yeah, I saw a few of those too."

"So, did you come back once you were done there?"

"No, I still had BPS. And if I thought the high school was weird, it had nothing on our next destination. . ."

Discord knocked on empty space. "Hey, chaos buddy! I brought a friend!"

"Ohohohohohohohohoho!" A high pitched spinning laughter sounded from the other side. "Come on i~n!"

Discord opened the empty space and pulled his unicorn travel buddy into it. "Here we are. A realm of pure chaos! A realm where the strongest minds can fall, and the weakest could change anything. Perhaps. My chaos buddy lives here, and is one of the strongest in the. . . Well, you can't really call it land, can you?"

"My eyes!" Searing shouted as she looked at the surroundings, where landscapes melded and broke like clay, where the future affected the past in the present, where absolutely nothing made any sense.

"Audible sigh. Must I do everything?" Discord pulled out an eyedropper and dropped some liquid into Searing's eyes. "That better?"

"What. . . What am I looking at?" Searing shakily asked.

"The Warp, my dear. You'll get used to it soon enough."

A blue humanoid thing suddenly appeared. "Discord! It is so good to see you! Or it isn't. Maybe I'm hungry. Who knows?"

"Hi Tzeentch!" Discord happily greeted with an ocean wave. "Searing, this is a fellow chaos god. Fellow chaos god, this is Searing Victory."

Tzeentch didn't so much move as he did distort around to look at Searing. "Oooooh! A sapient unicorn! And she's quoting Sly Marbo too!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

"Hm, tone's all wrong. Still, A for effort."

"-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

"Cut her some slack, buddy," Discord said. "We haven't been here for long."

"-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

"Her head's not going to explode, right?" Tzeentch asked. "I'd hate to lose something like her."

"-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

"Don't worry, amigo," Discord said with an Italian accent. "I already gave her the Gellar eyedrops. She won't be exploding from The Warp anytime soon."

"-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

Tzeentch scrutinized the screaming mare. "Good set of lungs on this one. Can you stop her though?"

"If I must." Discord snapped a blindfold over Searing's eyes.

"-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. . . . . . . . That thing's still there, isn't it?" Searing asked as she calmed down a bit.

"Tzeentch is still here."

"But really, what even is 'here' anyways?" the Warp resident asked. "More importantly though; Discord, it's about time we settled the score."

"What score?" Searing asked.

"I agree," Discord said in an uncharacteristically serious tone. "How are we going to do it though?"

Tzeentch giggled. "Why so serious? It's just a children's card game."

I started laughing at the line. "S-seriously? A children's card game?"

"There's an emperor that plays it too," Searing said. "Apparently, it's serious business there."

"An emperor? Must be a popular game. Anyways, who won? Discord or Tzeentch?"

"She did." Discord hung his head in defeat as he held up a big flashing neon arrow pointing to Searing.

"And I still don't know how I did it," Searing stated. "Anyways, one of the later stops was in a corner of the internet. . ."

"Behold, Searing!" Discord announced. "The source of some of the craziest stuff on the internet! None other than The STBlackST himself."

Searing looked off in the distance to make out where Discord was referring to. "It's just a guy at a computer."

"There's more to it than just a computer. We are just past the minimum safe viewing distance of 1000 feet. If you want to get closer, you'll need a few layers of protective gear."

"Armor?"

"Chemical gear. You do not want to accidentally inhale any of the drugs good stuff he uses. That stuff scares me, and I'm a chaos spirit. You remember that one confusing playlist I had you watch?"

"Which one?"

"American Boot, bread tank, space cakes, that stuff."

"Ahh, that one. He made all that?"

"Yes. I suppose a closer look is in order?"

Searing gave him a resigned look. "We're not getting out of here without getting closer, are we?"

"Nope."

The mare sighed. "Do you want me in unicorn or human form?"

Discord thought about it for a full minute. "Let's go human. The payoff will be spectacular!"

"Payoff?"

"You'll know later. For now, you need to get dressed." He tossed her some shiny, tight looking clothes, and a booklet with a picture of the full outfit on it. "Let me know if you need any help." With a snap, a bathroom appeared around Searing, and after going to her human form, she started getting the new clothes on.

I held my head in my hands as I leaned over my desk, hiding my twitching eyelids from her sight. "Dare I even ask for a description of what you put on?"

"I. . . I'd rather not describe it," Searing said. "Safe to say though, it was snug, glossy, fit me very well, and. . . Are you alright, Yang?"

"Fine! I'm fine." There were a couple spots of red on the desk, soon joined by a few more. "I'll be fine in a bit."

Discord started laughing and I saw Searing turn to the chaos spirit, just at the edge of my sight. "Is this the payoff you mentioned?"

"Hahahahahhhhh. . . . Totally worth it!" Discord exclaimed as the sounds of a chaos spirit getting pummeled by hooves started up. "Okay okay! Not worth it! Uncle! Uncle!"

"And don't you forget it. Any funny business, and I will find a vat of nacho cheese big enough to dip you in."

I looked up and saw Discord twisted into a lightly salted pretzel, including a few grill marks. He even had a side of fried wings. "I don't think I want any other details about that part of the trip."

"That's good, since I don't remember much else of it. When I woke up, we were somewhere much more normal. Well, for a given value of normal. . ."

Searing opened her eyes and saw a wood ceiling. She flexed her fingers, a clear indication that she was human. "Where am I now?" she blearily asked.

"We're further back in time," Discord replied from his chair on the wall. "We're in a quaint little cabin in the woods, 1683, just outside Vienna."

"Neighenna?"

"No, Vienna. It's a different time, a different culture, and a different place. Also, I have an update on your condition."

"Which one?"

"BPS. You're almost completely cured."

"Thank goodness." Searing got out of bed and started taking in the details of the cabin. There really weren't many things to notice. Basic furniture, wooden walls, a couple small windows, and an open door revealing more of the same in more of the cabin.

"This should be our last stop. Go ahead and get dressed. We're going for a sunlit walk after you make lunch."

"Why am I making lunch?" Searing found her clothes and was disappointed at the dull selection of dresses.

"Norms of the time. Toodles!" Discord dropped through the floor. A moment later, the sound of a chair hitting the floor and breaking was heard. "I'm fine!"

"Long story short, the walk went pretty well," Searing summarized. "Along with more that came after it. Then September 12th happened."

"What happened?" I asked.

"Simply put. . ."

"DISCORD, WHAT IS THIS?" Searing shouted over the din of thousands of hooves shaking the land and thunder cracking in the sky.

"A moment that, in 330-something years, will become a meme," Discord calmly explained, his voice not impeded at all by the roaring cacophony of hooves and battle cries.

"THAT DOESN'T ANSWER ANYTHING!"

"Did you not pay attention in history class?"

"YOU MEAN MY METAL CLASS?"

"Well, this is the moment-" An electric guitar sounded out of nowhere. "-WHEN THE WINGED HUSSARS ARRIVED!"

I found myself tapping out a tune as Searing told her tale of WHEN THE WINGED HUSSARS ARRIVED, and I made a note to see if I could magic up the rest of it later. "So, then what?"

"After it was over, Discord said I was cured and it was time to come home," Searing said. "That was less than an hour ago, and I've never been so happy to be in Equestria. So, do you want to see what I picked up?"

"Sure. Show me."

"Well, first, I got this skill." Searing's body glowed bright blue, and a moment later, I saw Searing as a human, wearing what looked like the school uniform she described. A small hill of luggage and bags came with the change, some of which landed gracelessly on the floor. "I still prefer being a unicorn, but this isn't bad either."

"Neat skill."

"Thank you. Now for the goodies." Searing looked over the luggage for a bit before settling on a silver one with hazard stripes. "I got this thing from the bunker." From the case, she pulled out a behemoth of a rifle. It was big, heavy, and went almost end to end on the desk. "I couldn't tell what it's called, so I named it the Blasting Laser Cannon. Or BLC. I've even got a second one.”

I gingerly picked up the hefty gun. “So, what kind of ammo does it take?”

“None that I could find. As far as I could tell, it’s either fully loaded or uses something else." She turned to the chaos spirit, untangled and wearing a blue army helmet. "Do you know anything about it?"

"I know nuzzink about how it works," Discord said with a heavy German accent. "Nuzzink!"

Searing turned back to me, "Yeah, we're not getting anything out of him. Do you know anywhere we can take it for a test run?"

"Hmmm. . ." I thought about it for a bit. "Well, there is the diamond dog territory nearby, but I don't want to spook them with my presence again. Celestia might be able to help us. Or maybe Twilight could. Either way, we'll have to go shooting later. It's a busy day."

"I can go get my uniform and help out."

"Pack up and go do that."

A big grin graced Searing's face. "Yes, ma'am!" After packing up and switching back to unicorn, she left.

I turned to the draconequus in the room. "Can I help you with something, Discord?"

"Oh, not really," he casually said. "But tell me, how does it feel knowing that there's someone similarish to you in town now?"

"I'm still trying to wrap my head around the Background Pony Syndrome stuff. I mean, you'd think I wouldn't forget her, but. . ."

"If it's any consolation, everyone else in town forgot about her too. Anyways, I'll be off now. Ciao~." With a snap, Discord disappeared.

I looked down at the red spots on the desk, then found some tissues. I was able to clean it up without leaving any easily spotted stains. Before heading back out, I checked myself for blood. There was a little bit from my nose, but that was it.

Searing entered the kitchen in uniform. "Hey, Yang?"

"Yeah?" I asked while preparing some barbecue baked potatoes.

"Is. . . Is your guest room available? They kind of foreclosed on my place."

"Yeah, sure. We can talk details after closing."

"Thanks." Searing left the kitchen and was at the bar with Aegir a moment later.

Author's Notes:

Credit goes to Painkiller for pointing out a character that I'd totally forgotten about: Searing Victory. For those who forgot, she's a unicorn that suplexed and pinned Yang back when Yang decided to join in on the training at the Canterlot boot camp by surprise. Hired as bartender and bodyguard, then kind of just disappeared.

Once I got started with writing her adventure with Discord, I knew there was a story there. Here it is: Searing Victory's Unusual Adventure.