"Am I overdressed?" I asked to nopony, as the dressing room I was standing in was both small and completely void of any life aside from myself. Looking at my reflection, taking in the indigo dress I was wearing, as well as the green emerald accents that went down the neck and along the sides of the clothing, I couldn't stop asking myself if I was over doing it. Then I went on to think about whether or not that was even possible, given the circumstance. "Can you be overdressed for this kind of thing?"

I sighed, leaning my head against the mirror as I closed my eyes and tried to make sense of it all. "What am I even doing?" I asked quietly, not wanting anypony to hear me. "He's a sweet kid and all, but...he's a kid!" I raised my head and looked over myself again. I didn't go crazy with makeup or anything, but I did try to accent myself some with some light green eyeshadow. Nothing fancy or over the top, just a nice tint to help my eyes pop out more. "What am I doing?"

"I'm waiting for you to come out so I may grant approval of my son's date." Luna's voice chimed in from behind the closed door. This made my heart sink a little. This whole thing was weird enough on its own, then there was Luna, who almost seemed to want this more than Ebah did. I honestly cannot, for the life of me, figure out how Ebah got her on board with this whole thing.

"I'll be right out!" I called out, pushing my mane to the side a bit with a hoof before opening the door and stepping out into the royal wardrobe.

Being a guard for as long as I have, I know this castle like the back of my hoof. However, it is very rare for anypony, besides the princesses, to enter the wardrobe. Guarding the outside; Completely normal. Actually being permitted to enter, let alone being invited, was unheard of.

As I stepped out, my vision was graced with a large number of dresses and outfits of all colors, each one pristine and neatly hanging on a rack that appeared to be organized by the occasion that would call for it. These were what surrounded me. As for what was standing in front of me, that just so happened to be the alicorn princess I've been loyally serving under for years, staring me down as if she were searching my very soul for even the slightest imperfection.

Luna's gaze softened and a smile quickly took over her features as she looked me over one last time. "And my approval you shall have." She said, pleased with our combined efforts on my appearance. "Ebah will absolutely love you."

I tried to fight it, I really did, but I couldn't keep the red out of my face as those words left her mouth. She is really pushing for this and I don't have a clue as to why. The arrangement Ebah made with her was one thing, but that hardly explained why she was so... enthused? About all of this. "Are you sure that you're okay with this?" I asked, wanting to make sure she wouldn't change her mind at the last second and send me to the moon or something. "I mean...Ebah's a lovely colt, but he's so young and-"

"Garnette, please." Luna cut me off, her hoof raised to stop me in my tracks as her expression became serious. "While I do have my reservations about this, all of this, I must have faith in my son and his love interests." She explained calmly, "Furthermore, we have already discussed how I expect you two to behave while in each others presence; To which he responded in favor of you." I wasn't as taken back by this as I was everything else. But, it was a little odd to hear that he was saying something good about me. Normally I only hear insults and rants coming from him.

"In fact, he very rarely speaks ill of you." Luna continued, this time catching my full attention. "Aside from thinking you're some kind of blood sucker, and possibly homosexual-" Wait, what!? "-He never says anything that would put you in a bad light, so to speak." She paused, looking deep in thought while I continued to try and wrap my head around the 'homosexual' thing she brought up. What the fuck was he saying about me to her!

"My son holds you in high regard, Garnette." Luna went on to say, "So much so that he was willing to fight a full grown stallion in your defense. It took a moment for me to accept it, but if he truly cares that much about you, then who am I to say that you are unworthy of his affection."

...Did she just say that I wasn't good enough for a colt that's barely pushing his pre-teens?

Luna smiled at me, placing a hoof on my shoulder as she looked into my eyes. "I may not have much to go off of, but from what he has said, I have faith that you will treat him right and be there for him as any mare should be for her stallion." This...actually made me feel kinda nice. There was a pleasant warmth building in my stomach that- "And if you break his heart, I will shatter every bone in your body." Aaand it's gone! The fact that she smiled the whole time she said that only makes it so much worse!

I tried to smile and play it cool when I went to respond. I succeeded in smiling, but even that was rough around the edges. "Understood, Princess!"

I may not be this waiters biggest fan, but I gotta admit, he knew exactly how to please me.

I've never been on an actual date in my entire life, but I did plan one out in case I would ever meet someone who caught my attention. The dining room had now been converted into my vision of a perfect date; The table was covered in a fine red cloth, with a centerpiece that I thought was almost too much to my liking, three tall candles surrounded by glass cylinders. The entire room was candle lit, as I wanted it to seem as romantic as possible, and keep my eyes from hurting from too much light. Then to top it all off, my new mother actually made the moon full for this occasion.

Everything was perfect. If I weren't such a fucking man I probably would have shed a tear or two. To make up for that, I did something I didn't think I would ever do.

I approached the waiter, my small form barely anything to be intimidated by, though he did cower a bit, and offered him a smile. "You kicked ass here today, my dude." I said, easing him out of his fear-induced state. "Never thought I'd say this, especially to you, but thanks. You did a great job."

The waiter's- I really need to learn this guy's name- gaze rested on me and he seemed to visibly relax. "Anything for the prince."

Prince...Yeah, I still don't like that. "That's Lord to you and everyone else in this castle." I corrected, maybe sounding a bit more serious than I actually intended.

Panic shined through his eyes for a second as he bowed apologetically. "Of course, my Lord! I meant no disrespect. Please, forgive me."

I could get used to this.

Okay! Let's try to avoid that then!

"Calm down, I'm not mad." The waiter rose from his bow, slightly relieved that I wasn't upset with him. "I just don't like the sound of 'Prince'. Unless it's the singer, who has my utmost respect, I don't wanna hear it come out of anyone's mouth while I'm around."

"Yes, Lord." I don't know about anyone else, but that sounded way better than 'Prince'. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"

I took a few seconds to think that over. The dining room was everything I could ask for, the full moon was a bonus, and everything I had planned for after dinner was already in place. All that's left is making sure that I'm still presentable. I turned my attention back to the waiter. "How do I look?"

The stallion looked me over, first going over my combed mane with his eyes before moving on to my dark suited form. His eyes locked onto my red cravat, my personal preference to ties, and dared to make a move. He placed a hoof to the article, adjusting it some before pulling back. "There you go. Now it's perfect, my Lord."

Mmm, I love it.

Starting to sound a little creepy up there...

"Anything else, my Lord?" He asked, prompting me to think again. What else could I possibly need to make this really blend together. I can't believe I didn't think of it sooner. What does every date have that always helps to lighten the mood and put everyone's nerves at ease; Fuckin' wine!

"A bottle of-" No, don't make it as cheesy as the movies. Let's try to keep it somewhat real here. "some of best wine we have. Not asking for the top notch stuff, but nothing cheap either."

The waiter offered me an unsure look. I could already see where this was going. "But, my Lord; Aren't you a bit young for-"

“Do you really wanna argue with me on this?” I interjected, shooting him down a peg or two.

"Of course not! Right away, my Lord!" The waiter took off like a bullet, running off to god only knows where. I couldn't help but to notice the look he had before taking off like he did. The guy looked absolutely terrified. I know our last couple of interactions didn’t play out so well, but sheesh. Calm down, dude.

I didn't get another minute to dwell on the weird waiter's behavior as the sound of several hooves meeting the solid floor reached my ears. I turned my attention to the entryway and- Wow! Garnette all but strutted in, with the woman in tow, looking like some sort of gothic, pony wet-dream.

Okay, that sounded weird. But, what else can I say? The mare is absolutely breathtaking! That statement became way too real as I realized my body's need to take in air. I drew a few breaths to keep myself from passing out, trying to regulate my lungs until they were working properly again. She came up to me with a nervous smile and a touch of red in her cheeks.

"Good afternoon, Ebah." She began, looking more than a little uncomfortable. "You look nice."

I tried to form a coherent sentence, but all that came out was a bunch of mumbling, gibberish that ended with my previous assessment. "Wow..."

The woman gestured for Garnette to take a seat. I would have done the gentlemanly thing and gone over to pull out her chair, but was stopped before I could even take a single step forward. With a blue hoof on my shoulder, the woman shot me a worrisome look. Or maybe it was dread? Either way, something wasn't right.

"Ebah, may I speak with you privately for just a moment?" I was caught a little off guard by this. She and I had already hashed out the details on how I wanted this night to go. What more was there to discuss? If she's backing out on her end, I am going to murder someone!

"Fine..." I huffed, following her back to the entrance to the dining room. We came to a stop right outside of the open door, where she proceeded to start analyzing the whole damn area.

"You haven't noticed anything odd, have you?" She asked, now beginning to capture my full attention. "Seen anything even remotely out of the ordinary?"

This doesn't sound good. I mean, aside from the waiter acting a little funky just a few minutes ago- which isn't too surprising after all he's gone through with me- nothing seemed out of place. "I can't say that I have. Why?"

The woman narrowed her eyes, looking around again as if to make sure no one was listening. She leaned in close to me and whispered, "Something just doesn’t feel right. I can’t quite put my hoof on it, nor can I shake this odd feeling I have."

I raised a brow at this, feeling as though I knew what she was trying to do. Ten to one she changed her mind at the last second and is trying to call it off. I thought it best to play dumb first; Give her a chance to straighten her shit before I lose mine. "Okay? I'm not sure where I fit in to this development."

The woman started to look conflicted, like she wanted to say something, but was holding back for some reason. Gee, I wonder what it is. "I...I just think that..."

Okay, starting to lose my patience a little. "Think what?"

Biting her lip, the woman closed her eyes as she seemed to finally come to a decision. "Just...keep an eye out for anything strange. Should something happen, do not hesitate to call for me."

That’s a good pony. "I'll keep that in mind." I was about to walk off, but there was one last thing I wanted to be sure of before I got started with Garnette. "So about the whole 'privacy' thing we talked about..."

The woman let out a sigh. She wasn't too happy about no pony keeping an eye on me, but I made it abundantly clear how much I hated being watched constantly. "The guards will be patrolling the outside of the gardens, for security purposes. But, at your request, they will refrain from entering for the night."

To be honest, I'm actually quite surprised with how well she was taking all of this. Just this morning she wasn’t even hesitant to shoot down the idea of me going after Garnette. I hoped that my argument would convince her to change her mind- which it did- but I never thought she'd go all out to try and make my vision come true.

As disgusted as I am with this, I do owe her a little something for all of her help. I took a few steps toward the towering mare, getting up on my hind legs so I could reach her neck, and gently wrapped my hooves around it. "Thanks...mom."

You did NOT just do that!

The woman made a sound akin to a hiccup before quickly wrapping her hooves around me and lifting me up even as she went and sat on her haunches. "Anything for you, my son!" She waved my body around a bit. I guess the excitement got to her. Before long she set me down, spinning me around and all but pushing back into the dining room. "Now get out there and woo that mare!"

I almost lost my footing from being shoved like I was, but managed to catch myself before I made the mistake of falling flat on my face. Once I was stable again, I made my way to the table, spotting the waiter from earlier pouring two glasses of wine before taking off again.

Making my way to my seat, I couldn't help but stare at Garnette just a little. My attraction to her was kinda there, but also not, when we first met, but over time I found myself growing much more fond of her both physically and mentally. Seeing her all dressed up though really kicked everything into gear. She is drop-dead gorgeous and if I don't tap that at some point, I'm gonna kick my own ass.

I climbed onto my seat, adjusting a bit until I was comfortable. Looking over at Garnette, two things were made very clear. One; I don’t care that she's technically a cross between a vampire bat and a horse. My dick is going in it as soon as I am able. And two; She was nowhere near comfortable.

It's understandable, I guess. In her eyes I'm a fucked up kid that was trying to have a night of romance with her. I have put her in a spot that not many face in their lifetime, nor do they even consider something like this happening to them. Yet, here she is. Being how this is my fault, I took it upon myself to try and lighten the mood and make things feel natural.

"A toast!" I announced, quickly earning her attention as I awkwardly wrapped my hoof around the wine glass in front of me and raised it above my head. "To...what is probably going to be the weirdest night of your life."

I'm relieved to say that I managed to get a smile, and even a light chuckle out of her. "You can say that again." She reached out a hoof and grabbed her own glass, but with much more ease, and raised it as well. "To the weirdest night of my life."

We shared a pleasant smile and sipped from our respective glasses, setting them down shortly after. "So, sweetheart;" I began ignoring the light tinge of red in her face. "You've gotten to know me pretty well since I came here, but I really don't know that much about you." Ever since I first came here and Garnette became my sitter, I've shared plenty of stories about my previous life with her. She's brought up a few things about her past as well, but only a few. "How about a bit of background?"

There was a pause, and judging by the look on her face, she was going over how exactly to answer my question. I mean, I pretty much just asked for her life story. There's a lot to sort through with that kind of thing. "Well, I guess we could start off where my species comes from and go from there." She said before continuing, "My ancestors came to Equestria from the northern mountains a long time ago; Long before the rise of Nightmare Moon."

Something about that name sent a shiver down my spine. Not sure why, it wasn't all that threatening. Fuck it, it's not important. "Years passed as they went from place to place, being chased out of towns and threatened left and right for being different from other ponies. They were lost, alone, and unwelcome here."

Well...fuck.

"That must have been awful." This hit a little too close to home for me, but they must have had it so much worse. "I, myself, was homeless for four years. That alone sucked. I couldn't imagine being kicked out of entire towns though."

"It was hard, but they pulled through." I could see a certain glow in her eyes as she went on to tell more about her family history. "Princess Luna stumbled upon them one day and took pity on them. She welcomed my family and others of our kind into her home with her sister, Princess Celestia. She gave them everything they needed to survive. In return, they offered to be her loyal servants. I was born here, in Equestria, and was raised at a young age to be one of her guards. I've spent most of my life within this very castle, doing my best to repay the princess for her kindness to my species."

Okay...I'm a huge fuckin' dick.

My mouth was a tad difficult to move for a few seconds, but a quick slap to the face got it going. "You uh...You really know how to open a guy's eyes...and make him feel like the biggest asshole in existence." Here I was treating that blue mare like she's some kind of nutjob, which she is in some cases, but at the same time she opened up her heart and home to an entire species that was cast out by society.

Kinda like how she did with me...Fffuck!

I soon found my head in my hooves as I played back every thing I ever did to her, everything I said, everything I put her through. "Oh my God, I'm such a cock!"

"Calm down, Ebah. You're not THAT bad."

"But I am though." I argued, still going through the hell that was my mind and how I took it all out on the princess. "Since day one, all she tried to do was help me and I was so fucking ignorant that I shot her down every chance I could."

Why do you even care!?

"Because it's not fair!" I snapped, slamming my hooves into the table. "This whole time she's been nothing but generous and I'm treating her like a stray cat!"

"Ebah!"

Garnette's voice caught my attention, prompting me to look up and see that the flames on every candle in the room had nearly tripled in size. My eyes went up, catching a glimpse of my now glowing horn. Not know what else to do, I reach up and aggressively placed my hoof against it. This proved to be a little painful for some reason, but I found that doing so had cut off my magic and everything went back to the way it was.

I lowered my hoof, turning my attention back to the thestral that was now staring me down with a look of worry. "S-sorry about that." I said, feeling like the biggest fucking idiot in the world. "I guess I got a little caught up in the moment there."

The waiter returned before we could exchange any further to take our orders for the night and refill our glasses. I ordered the potato salad, being as it was really the only vegetarian thing that sounded appealing to me. I hardly registered Garnette's order, still being stuck in sort of a mental war with how I've been acting. We made some idle chat after the waiter left, which helped to calm my nerves a bit. After a while, he returned with our food and I went through the familiar battle of attempting to use this pony witchcraft to lift a fork.

It took a few unpleasant thoughts to get it going, but I did finally lift the damn thing. I figured that if I upped the ante on my anger-induced voodoo, I'd be able to use it properly. Instead, I only managed to make the utensil glow red before it melted into a puddle.

Our savant magician strikes again.

"Shut up..." I moved on to the spoon, trying to lift that now. It was just potato salad, it didn't matter which one you used. I just preferred the fork.

"Ebah." I looked up from my silverware, dropping it back to the table as I lost focus. "Can I ask you something...personal?"

This could go any direction. I don't wanna assume, but I hope it's something relating to the bedroom. "Yeah, sure."

Garnette tapped her hooves together, seeming to have her own little mental quandary. "I know this might be a sensitive topic, so you don't have to answer. I was just curious about...your illness." I raised a brow at her. I've brought it up a few times in the past, but never went into detail. "I don't mean to be insensitive or make you uncomfortable, I was just wondering..."

Now I know where this is going. "You wanna know what it's like, right?"

Garnette's eyes widened a bit, but she remained composed and nodded. "Yes...If you don't mind, that is."

"No, no. It's fine. You're not the first person to ask about it and I doubt you'll be the last." Though I do my best to avoid the topic, I don't leave people blind to it. This is something I've been dealing with for as long as I can remember. Half the time, I didn't even have to tell people about it. It's not hard to see that I ain't exactly right in the head. "What it is you're trying to receive from this?"

"I guess I just want to...I don't know...understand it better?" She clarified, "Like; If you could compare it to something, how would you describe it?"

That's a new one! Of all of the times I've been questioned about it, never once has anyone ever asked me to make a comparison. If I had to compare it to something though, I guess it would have to be along the lines of...

"Imagine having a few siblings. One's that constantly follow you around and refuse to leave no matter how much you plead." I began, doing my best to describe my little condition in a way she could understand. "Now imagine that they can't leave. That they're stuck with you no matter what and they're mad at the world because of it. But, the rest of the world can't hear them. The only one that can is you; so you're the one they can take it out on."

"Maybe it would be better described as being haunted." I thought out loud. "Like, you're a medium or some kind of ghost whisperer in a world full of people who aren't. And they rely on you for social interaction." Now that I think about it, that sounds really stupid. "It's basically like you're wandering around with these edgy, paranoid, and very angry people, who are chain-linked to you. And because of reasons, you don't really understand, they're calling you out on every little thing you do and no one else can hear them screaming."

I was at a loss for words, not knowing how to respond to such a thing. I imagined every example he gave and none of them seemed like something I would want even ponies I hated to go through. It's no wonder he acts out all of the time. If I had to deal with something like that every day of my life, I'd be on edge too.

Ebah must have noticed the look on my face, because he immediately changed the topic. "Did I mention that you are just breathtaking right now?"

Okay, I might have gotten a little red in the face from that. It's a fairly simple compliment, but one I don't hear very often. I decided to play it cool though and ease things back to how they would normally be when we were together. "If I recall correctly, the only word out of your mouth was 'Wow'."

"And I stand by that statement." Ebah said, earning a small laugh from me as a result.

We continued to make pleasant little conversations throughout the rest of this date he prepared, trying to avoid anymore touchy subjects. It was nice. Really. We laughed, we joked, shared some of our usual banter, and enjoyed our meals in between. Overall, it was a very lovely treat to get to do this. If he were a little older, I could honestly see myself having a satisfying relationship with Ebah.

Not only did Ebah share my more twisted sense of humor, but he actually listened to me and didn't judge me for some of my weaker points in life. In fact, he actually came to my rescue during one of them. That alone showed me that he cared more than he was letting on. Minus the daring move he made by asking me out. With how he is, and what he's done for me, being around him just felt right. It was a more than welcomed feeling, being around somepony that, in a sense, made me feel loved.

After a good while of talking and eating, the waiter returned to collect our plates and got started on taking everything down so he could return the dining room to its former glory.

I climbed out of my seat and got back to my hooves, a little disappointed that it was over. "I had a really nice time, Ebah. This was...more than I could have asked for."

I was going to offer him a little something for everything he had done to make this date happen, but something was up. I could see it in his eyes. "It ain’t over yet, my vampiric darling." He said, ushering me to follow him as he exited the dining room. "This way."

There's more???

I followed Ebah to our usual hangout, the castle gardens. I was a little confused as we entered the little slice of heaven, my eyes leaving him for a moment as I looked over the area, all brightly lit under the glow of the full moon...wait a minute...The moon isn't supposed to be full for another-

I was cut off mid-thought by an unfamiliar tune. My head jerked to the side, spotting Ebah next to a record player. "You know, it took me longer than I would have liked to find the pony version of this song. I was actually surprised that it shared the same name as the one from my world, just had a different artist name." He explained rather vaguely, walking back over to me and offering his hoof. "May I?"

A little dumbstruck by the gesture, I didn't say a word as I laid my hoof over-top of his. He lead me to an opening in the gardens where it appeared as though the moonlight had been focused. Once there, Ebah stood on his hind legs and I responded in kind. It was a little awkward, given the size difference between us. Even with his hooves around my waist, and his head only reaching my barrel, he managed to take the lead and moved us in a delicate motion, keeping pace with the slow song.

This was almost too much. I know full grown stallions who can't even fathom the idea of slow dancing, let alone perform it so effortlessly. Not to mention that I'm nearly twice this one's height. It all fit together so perfectly too. The full moon, the sweet melody ringing through my ears, the soft patterns of his hooves moving in harmony with my own.

We slowed down and relaxed a little more into each other as the song came to its end, our dance now moving into a gentle embrace of the other. When it finally ended, we separated. Ebah looked up at me with those old, bright blue eyes, a satisfied smile adorning his muzzle. I returned the gesture, feeling as though nothing could go wrong in this moment. It was almost too good to be true and...Oh my Luna, I'm falling for him!

My smile became strained, my heart beating out of my chest as I absentmindedly rubbed one of my hooves against the other. "T-Thank you for a wonderful time, Ebah." I said with a bit of a stutter, mentally slapping myself for it. "This was beyond anything I could have imagined."

Ebah shrugged, looking completely calm. "What can I say? You're worth the effort."

Ahhh! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop being so nice!

Ebah raised a brow at me. Not like expectantly, or like he was confused. In fact, I have no idea what's going through his head right now, as mine is currently in full freak-out mode!

Looking to the sky, Ebah's features returned to normal before turning his attention back to me. "It's getting pretty late." Something about the way he said that sounded off. "You should take the night off."

Oh, shit! I'm supposed to watch him tonight! I can't watch over him like this! It already feels like my heart is going to explode. And I don't think a night of cuddling will help any...Wait a second..."What?"

Ebah just smiled at me. "Yeah! As far as I'm concerned, you've put up with me enough tonight I think you need a break."

That...That doesn't make any sense. I thought he wanted to spend more time with me. Not send me away. "But...I'm supposed to..."

"Sweetheart, you're supposed to watch me to make sure I don't do anything stupid." He clarified to me, even though I already knew why I was supposed to watch over him. "But, I'm actually really tired. I'm just gonna go up to my room, have a quick bath, then hit the hay."

...He's lying...I know he is, I can hear it in his tone. But, why would he lie about something like that? It seems a little amateur for him. Unless...Is he giving me an out?

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Positive." He confirmed with a nod. "You go on ahead. I'm just gonna clean up out here a bit before I crash for the night."

Okay, now I KNOW he's lying. And it's actually kind of sweet. A genuine smile worked its way across my face. "Alright then. I'll see you tomorrow." What am I doing? Why am I leaning down? Why did I just kiss his cheek!? "Goodnight, Ebah."

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I quickly turned around and all but sprinted back into the castle, pressing my back flush against a wall as soon as I got past the door. Placing a hoof to my chest, I tried to slow down my heart rate. "It's okay, Gar! It's okay!" I told myself in vain, trying desperately to calm down. "Just relax. Take a deep breath." I inhaled deeply, holding it for a few seconds before letting it out. I lowered myself back to my hooves, continued to breath deeply and slowly. "It's okay...Everything is...A-Oh-Kay."

I started to head toward the guard's barracks when some sort of commotion caught my attention. "Wo- Woah! Hey! What the fu-mmmph!"

"Ebah?" I turned around and ran back into the gardens, finding only the record player, which had been knocked over at some point, and nothing else. "Ebah!?"

Author's Notes:

Find the fucking references! Also, if you can, find the callback to one of my older stories. I am issuing this as a fucking challenge!
Also, be sure to slap that LIKE button like a bitch and leave comments below. Comments make me feel special :P

And another big thank you to my old editor, Deka! He was lost and now he is found! Glad to have you back, buddy!

DekaSkittalz