Silence filled Luna's bed chambers as both she and the human sat across from each other. Each of them performing some sort of miniature action as to help make the moment feel less awkward. Ryan was sitting in a chair with one hand on his mouth as he leaned into his arm, his right leg bouncing up and down rapidly yet quietly. Luna sat on the edge of her bed, looking around her room as she played a game of Thumb War with herself.

Ryan lowered his hand from his face, placing it against his lap and raising his other hand to scratch at his head. Looking down he scanned his body. His other clothes were soaked and coated with mud so they were stripped away from him to be cleaned. Luckily for him the clothes in his bag were able to stay dry. Thank god for that waterproof spray shit. He now wore a pair of clean blue jeans, a plain black T-Shirt, a pair of black socks, and his leather gloves.

His eyes eventually wandered to Luna. She may be a different species and all, but hot damn! She was a fucking looker. Her body was thin with a decent muscle-tone, a perfect set of hips that rounded out that amazing flank of hers, and finally that small tank top holding in those monsters on her chest.

A plus on those Double D's sweetheart.

He also couldn't help but notice that they were about to spill out of that top of hers. Was this intentional? Was she willing wearing something like this? What exactly is the reasoning behind her wearing it? It seems like it would be uncomfortable...fuck it, boobs.

Luna soon let her eyes rest on Ryan, as something seemed to be distracting him. When she followed his gaze and noticed what he was looking at she blush lightly and asked in a somewhat reprimanding voice, "Does there appear to be something in here that is catching your attention?"

Shit! She spotted you. Quick, think of a lie!

Ryan's eyes quickly shot up to Luna's face and stayed there as he tried to think of an excuse as to why he was ogling her chest. "I really like your shirt. That crescent moon on it reminds me of something I made a while back."

Way to be.

Luna tilted her head in slight confusion. Did this human perhaps have some sort of attachment to the moon back in his world. "Something you made? What exactly is it that you created?"

"A crescent moon. It's not very good, but it's special to me." As Ryan spoke he reached into his shirt and grabbed onto the necklace he had tucked away, pulling it out for Luna to see. It was about the size of a fist, but it was a flat circle with a curved line going down the middle that gave it the appearance of a crescent moon.

In all of her years she could tell that it was some sort of metal that he made this from. She could also see that it had been powder coated, usually something like this is done to prevent rust. The powder coat made the moon necklace completely black and reflective. She wondered why he would make something like this. "Why would one make something like this? Is it for rituals, a sign of devotion, perhaps to a certain group?"

"I guess you could say that." He replied, "For me it's my devotion to the moon and everything that revolves around the night."

Now she was really curious. Did his people worship the night in his world? Was the moon praised like some sort of god-like figure? Or perhaps there were even people in his world that controlled the sun and the moon that had their own followers. "Would you mind elaborating on this? I'm very curious as to what it stands for specifically. Is there, perchance, some sort of hierarchy that the symbol rests upon?"

"Nope. It's just me and my moon."

"I don't understand..."

"To put it simply, princess. I made this because I love the night and I love the moon. There's no systems behind it, no armies of day and night or whatever. Not a lot of people where I come from appreciate the world around them. I don't really either, but ever since I was a kid I always felt like...I don't know. That I had some weird connection with the moon."

Luna could see that his features becoming that of nostalgia and attempted to question him further, but found herself being interrupted by Ryan. "Seems a little odd, don't you think?"

Again, Luna was slightly confused. One minute he was talking about his connection to the moon and now he was referring to something as odd. "What do you mean?"

"Think about it for a second. I've always felt I had a connection with the moon and now here I am talking to a woman-"

"A mare."

"Fuck you, who raises the moon and brings out the night in a completely different world. If you ask me, this isn't some sort of coincidence."

Bet money that she had something to do with you coming here.

Luna smiled nervously and started rubbing the back of her neck. "Well actually...you see...I'm kind of the reason you ended up here..."

Called it!

Ryan gave her a blank stare, when they told him he came here via portal earlier they failed to mention that there was a reason behind it. He assumed it was some kind of accident, but with that guilty yet satisfied look on Luna's face he could tell there was more to it than just that. "You got five seconds to explain this shit before I come over there and punch you in the tit."

Despite the fact that Luna was more than capable of bringing this guy down, and she knew it, she decided to humor him and give him an answer. It's the least he deserves. As embarrassing as it was to admit, she swallowed her pride and spoke. "I have been in need of a mate, however, none of the stallions here managed to capture my attention. That being said, my sister and I created a portal that would find somepony with a personality that resembles mine. It doesn't have too much to do with your rhythmic feelings towards the moon, it's mostly because I'm a certain way and you are the closest match."

So...eHarmony for bipedal talking horses?

Ryan stood up out of his chair and raised both hands in front of his face. "Stop! Wait! Hold the fuck on. You're telling me that I'm here because of some weird magical pony 'Perfect Match' bullshit? How the hell does that...We aren't even the same species! Hell, you and I are probably nothing alike. I mean, you got the bad girl look and that's hot and all, but I don't see you having the attitude for it."

Luna rose to her feet as well, almost as if she took his words as a personal insult. "Excuse me! Are you saying that you, a little human, have more of a rebellious streak than the two thousand year old princess of the night?"

Did this bitch just challenge us?

The night princess was maybe an inch or two taller than Ryan, but her stature wasn't going to be enough to scare him into submission. Not only that, but there was no way in hell she could outdo him. "Sweetheart, you can play your little games all you want, but I'm in the lead here."

"Oh please, I've fought in wars."

"Justifiable deaths, you did it to protect your land. I fought in gangs."

"Petty fights with little casualties. I leveled a whole nation."

"All's fair in money and politics. I temporarily brought down my own government for fun."

"Must have been a weak government. I can literally kill nightmares!"

"Dreams aren't real. I broke a cop's nose before jumping off of two hundred foot cliff!"

"I've sentenced stallions twice your size to death and watched them being beheaded!"

"Which was likely a royal decision because they committed a crime! That's not rebellious, that's justice. I've killed six men, three with my bare hands, one with a bat, and two with a car!"

"I blocked out the sun in an attempt to cover the world in darkness for all eternity!"

"...I don't really see the problem with that." Would that be a problem? He wondered, what with this world being full of magic and all that jazz they don't really need the sun to survive.

"Exact-Wait, what?" Luna asked in both shock and confusion.

Celestia let out a light yawn, signalling that it was almost time to call it a night. She pushed the paperwork she was going through aside and took a deep, relaxing breath. Before she goes to bed she should probably see how her sister and the human are fairing. She rose from her throne and stretched her limbs, popping a few of them as she did so before making her way to Luna's bedroom.

The walk wasn't a long one, but in Celestia's professional opinion, it could be shorter. Once she arrived she looked over at the unguarded door. The fact that the guards weren't watching over them made Celestia a bit uncomfortable, but Luna liked her privacy and refused to let the guards be near her room.

She couldn't really say anything about it, this was her wing of the castle, meaning that all of this area was the night princesses jurisdiction. With a firm step she walked over to the door and reached out to grab the nob. However, an odd assortment of sounds from the other side prompted her to stop and listen.

It sounded like there was some sort of struggle, which made Celestia assume the worst. Her heart racing and her protective instincts kicking in she burst through the door to find the one thing she feared come to life. Luna was being held to the ground with one of her arms being forced to bend at a painful looking angle.

Her eyes shot up to the one pinning Luna, the human she had left her alone with who back at her with an expression entirely filled with surprise and fear. As her anger grew, the temperature in the room started to rise.

Ryan looked up at the white mare from earlier, quickly taking notice of an angered expression enveloping her features. He could do nothing but what as he mane went up in flames and her horn started to glow. He also couldn't help but notice the whole room felt like it was moved a few hundred yards closer to the sun.

Not good. Not good! RUN!!!

He quickly let go of Luna's arm and dodged a beam of yellow light that shot out of the princesses horn before diving under the night princesses large bed. One might believe that taking refuge under a mattress would be both childish and cowardice. It would be, but this circumstance is different. It is actually a well known fact that alicorns are weak against mattresses and their divine powers. Making them incapable of-"Fuck!"

Luna watched as her sister marched over to her bed and lifted it off of the ground with one hand, making it lean toward the wall. Ryan screamed one of his weird human swear words that he told her about as he tried to crawl away from her sister. With the shock finally gone from her body, Luna went up to her sister and pulled her away from Ryan.

"Sister, stop this now!" The night princess yelled, "It wasn't what it looked like, you are misunderstanding the situation."

Celestia unwillingly turned to face Luna, the fire in her eyes and in her mane still shinning brightly as she was screamed at by her younger sibling. "How was that misunderstood? He was attacking you!"

"He was not attacking me!"

Ryan took this opportunity to slip out of the door and run like a bat out of hell to the nearest room he could hide out in. Making sure to avoid a repeat of the shower room situation, he read the signs posted above the doors, charging into the one labeled 'Janitor's Closet' and locking the door.

After about ten minutes of hiding he heard a knock at the door and quickly put on his best impression of a Mexican maid. "No body-I mean pony, is home! Please check back later."

They knocked again, this time more firmly. "Ryan, it's Celestia, please open the door."

She sounded calm enough, but Ryan wasn't gonna go for it. He liked taking risks and all, but this was one that would, more likely then not, get him killed. "I'm sorry Miss Celestia, I don't know anypony by that name."

Celestia wore a deadpan expression and slapped her hand against her head. "Ryan, I know that's you. Please open the door. I just wanna talk."

"You can go fuck yourself!" He yelled in his normal voice, seeing no reason to keep doing his shitty impression. Suddenly the knob became coated in a golden light. With a click of the lock the door swung open, revealing the sun princess on the other side standing straight and tall with her arms crossed.

Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee...Shit!

Ryan smiled nervously and started behaving as if they were friends who hadn't seen each other in years. "Oh! Hey Celestia! How's it going? I was just talking about you! Wow, I really love what you've done with your mane, it's so-fuck it, just kill me already."

Whelp, it was nice knowing ya. I guess I'll see you in Hell. Don't worry though, I'll save you a seat.

Celestia sighed. She was upset, but not with him. She was upset with herself. "Ryan, I'm sorry I tried to attack you. I still don't know you, and you two were in her room, and I heard all of that noise...I thought you were trying to hurt my sister."

"Well I may have been trying just a little, but I think she deserved-"

You better start rephrasing that right now or you're gonna be on a spit with an apple in your mouth while they roast you over her hair.

Ryan cleared his throat and continued, this time wording it differently. "Look, I would never hurt your sister. She and I were just talking and...who'd of known we both like to fight? Like...I'm really not sure how to-"

Celestia placed a finger to his lips to silence him. "Don't worry, I completely understand. Luna already told me everything."

He breathed a sigh of relief and waited for Celestia to move her hand before continuing. "I guess I can't blame you for acting the way you did. You saw me putting your sister in an arm bar for fuck sake. Hell, when I found out my sister's boyfriend had hit her I broke both of his legs."

"While I don't completely agree with your actions, I do think that he shouldn't have put his hands on your sister." Celestia commented.

"Don't agree wi-You tried to turn me into a god damn shish kebab!"

The sun princess smiled and nodded to him before turning to face the night wing. "Come along now, it's getting late. I'll lead you to your room."

Ryan shrugged and followed close behind her. Today has been interesting; first he was running from police, he jumped off a cliff, got pulled through the eHarmony portal, woke up being straddled by aliens, was told he was supposed to be mated with the princess of the night, and then he was almost killed by her sister. "Wow, today has been fucking nuts."

Celestia giggled at the human. He was a really fascinating creature and all, but despite the physical differences, he was a lot like a normal stallion. Everything she had heard from Luna was enough to tell her that. "So, I hear you've grown quite fond of my sister's chest region."

"...uhh"

Run, bitch! Run!

Ryan was about to take off for the third time today, but Celestia grabbed onto his shirt, rendering any attempts of escape null and void. "Do not worry, it's not a bad thing. You are supposed to be her perfect mate after all, your attraction to her is an important part of this development."

When Celestia was sure he wasn't going to run, she released her grip on Ryan who continued to follow her. "Development? What development? What are you getting at?"

"Why, your relationship with Luna, of course." She said with a smile. Now that he knew why he was brought here, she could commence the teasing of both him and her sister. Especially if they actually started growing close to each other.

"Woah...Woah! Hold on a second! Our relationship? Okay, I get the portal says I'm her perfect match or whatever, but that doesn't mean I'm just gonna marry her right off of the bat. Besides, marriage is evil; and, statistics show that it is the leading cause of divorce."

"I guess I'll just have to wait for you two to be walking down the isle so I can say I told you so. I can already imagine the foals you would have." She said with a laugh, causing Ryan to grumble.

Okay, alright. If this bitch wants to play that way, he can play it better. "If Luna and I have kids, I'll make sure to remind you every day of your life that I fucked your sister."

It didn't take Luna too long to fix up her room. She could understand why Celestia acted the way she did and didn't blame her for it in the slightest. It was extremely unappreciated though, so she would likely prank her later for this. Once she was done she prepared herself for night court and exited her room.

She wondered if Celestia had apologized to Ryan yet, more importantly, if he was accepting that apology. Before she could even take three steps forward she saw a familiar silhouette flying down the hallway. Once it got close enough she lowered herself to the ground, allowing it to fly over her head and slam into the wall behind her.

Holy shit! You're gonna feel that tomorrow.

Ryan's body twitched a few times, the force of the impact having knocked him out. The abuse he had suffered today was almost as bad as when he woke up in Tijuana, Mexico with no pants nor recollection of who he was. Oh well, it's just another adventure in Ryan's wonderful, fucked up life.