(FoME)

Luna sighed, slumped onto the table, and wished she were drinking something stronger. "This is a terrible idea."

"I'm just saying," Cadence just said, "it does encourage higher performance on everyone's part at Crystal Prep."

"I can't believe you still do this even after taking Cinch's place."

"The students expect it. The parents expect it." Cadence's chipper facade slipped a bit. "And, well, the alumni who provide the bulk of our budget definitely expect it. I'm already in enough hot water with my other reforms; I couldn't get rid of the public test results even if I wanted to right now."

"Besides," said Glimmer Goodwitch, "you're clearly stalling."

"A bet's a bet," added Jace.

Luna grit her teeth. The lights in the bar flickered a few times before she bit out, "Fine. But you're going to help me frame it so Celestia doesn't suspect we're implementing this just because you have sharper gaydar than I do."

Cadence nodded, pleasant smile back in place. "Of course."

(Malandy)

Ringo looked at the exam results, and reached some surprising conclusions. Not from the standings in and of themselves. Everyone expected Sunset and Twilight to tie for first. After them came Lyra and Ditzy who, though quirky and clumsy respectively, were clearly very smart.

He'd just never seen all four names lined up together, and that sent his thoughts in an unexpected direction.

He was with the rest of Flash Drive, so he leaned over to their guitarist and whispered, "Hey, Flash?"

"Yeah, Ringo?"

"Anything jump out at you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Sunset, Twilight, Lyra, and Ditzy."

"What..." Flash trailed off, confusion giving way to dawning horror. "Oh, no. No. No, NO!"

Ringo cut him off with an elbow jab. "Come on, man, you're making a scene. You have to admit, this is a lot better than the alternative."

"That my type is smart girls and not ponies? Sure it is, but you didn't see who came after Ditzy."

"Who... Oh."

A burst of smoke filled the hallway, and when it cleared it left a posing girl where none had been before. "Did someone say The Great and Powerful Trixie's name?"

Ditzy Doo appeared out of nowhere without so much as a smoke bomb, wrapped her arms around Flash's chest, and glared at Trixie. "Mine."

"Trixie wasn't—"

"MINE!"

Author's Notes:

No one steals Ditzy's waifu.

Wait...