Author's Notes:

This is what happens when you write at 1:00 AM one too many times.

An earsplitting crack echoed through the room as Rainbow Dash hobbled in.

"Ah, shucks." Applejack began, walking towards the old mare. "'Dash, for the last time, ya shouldn't be walkin' 'round so much. It ain't good for them rickety bones o' yours."

"Shut it, ya lil' whippersnapper!" Rainbow Dash lashed out, another crack emanating from her joints as she winced. "I'M TELLIN' YOU, IT'S THAT DARN ARTHRITIS AGAIN. YA GOTTA USE THE SHRINKYDINKS TO CURE MY ARTHRITIS!"

Twilight rolled her eyes. "For the last time, Rainbow." She groaned, "What the heck are shrinkydinks? What are they even good for?"

"YOU TALKING ABOUT MY SHRINKYDINKS, EH?!" Rainbow screeched, her cane boring a hole into the floor, "LEMME TELL YA, THEM SHRINKYDINKS MAKE MY ACHY JOINTS SHRINK UNTIL IT'S JUST A LITTLE DINK. YA GOT IT?! SOMEPONY GRAB THE THING FOR ME BEFORE I BREAK MY BACK YELLIN' AT YOU YOUNGUN'S."

"Ah." Rarity mused, leaving her seat for the medicine cabinet. "She wants her medication."

Suddenly, Pinkie burst from underneath the floorboards.

"I have osteo-porosis!"

"What."

"What?"

"...Nevermind, Pinkie."

"Just kidding!"