As soon as Applejack crawled back in the pod Rainbow asked bluntly, without rolling over to look at her, "How can you not want to kill all of them? You've lost more than any of us. Aren't you just busting with hatred?"

Apple just stopped and looked at Rainbow. "No. I hurt too much to hate. My granma, my little sister, my boyfriend, my friends are all dead. I aint never gonna see them again. That kills me inside. Nothing I do will ever bring them back. The only thing I can do is try to stop them from killing anyone, everyone else. But I still, no matter why Imma doing what I'm doing, thems people; they's someone's son, brother, maybe husband or father. Possibly someone's mamma and they's gonna feel the same pain I am right now because of me."

"I . . . I, I can't be like you," Rainbow said; her voice breaking, giving away the unseen tears that steamed from her eyes. Rainbow did burn with hate. It was a fire that had consumed every moment since last Saturday and only intensified after the everything that had happened since. After Apple left she was alone, with her hate, her bloodlust. She couldn't stand what she had become because of it. She hated the way she felt because of it but she didn't know how to feel any other way.

Apple crawled up beside her and put her around her. "I know you can't sugar cube. No one's askin' ya to. I guess I was earlier. Do what ya gotta do sweetie - lord knows we need it."

"Am I a monster?" Rainbow asked full of woe and fear.

"No, you're The Warrior. You're one of my best friends as well. I love ya Dash." Apple hugged Rainbow closer. Her heart broke for her friend and she wanted her to feel better.

"Thanks AJ." Rainbow was glad she was with Apple. Out of all their friends, Apple was the closest to Rainbow personality wise. She and Fluttershy had been closer when they were younger but now Fluttershy had gotten closer to Rarity. Rainbow liked Rarity. Being around Rarity allowed Rainbow to be more girlie but they were still operating on different wavelengths. Sunset, Twilight were fine. They were caring and Rainbow enjoyed their company but they were clearly operating on a different level and were closer to each other than anyone. Pinkie was a blast. She had more fun with Pinkie than anyone. She was also the first to suspect Pinkie might be gay based on how Rainbow would sometimes catch her looking at her. Still, it was Apple who got her the most and the one she respected and wanted to be respected by the most.

"My real name is Jennifer," Apple said softly, almost ashamed. "I've only ever told one other person that."

Rainbow nodded in the darkness. "Mine's Rachael. And same."

The two laid there, essentially spooning and feeling really exposed. If they had, had sex, it wouldn't have felt as intimate as revealing their real names to each other did. Both felt vulnerable and exposed but neither one regretted sharing. A new bond had been forged between them that neither completely understood but each knew changed their relationship forever.

"Rachael, I have something to tell you," Apple said and paused to see what Rainbow's reaction would be.

"What is it?" Rainbow was confused and interested by what Apple had to say but took no exception to her use of Rainbow's name.

"The last time Chip and I were together, when he stayed with me Monday, we were together. Together together. I'm on the pill, but I'm also The Earth Mother." Apple paused again and hoped Rainbow would understand what she was trying to say without actually having to say it.

Rainbow tensed up and her eyes bulged out as she grasped the inference Apple Jack was trying to make. "You caused yourself to get pregnant?" There was shock, anger, disappointment, and a touch of joy in her voice. Apple had always been the reasonable, down to earth one. She couldn't believe she would do something like that. "Jen, what were you thinking?"

Apple shook her head. "I don't know. With losing Apple Bloom and Granny Smith; I just didn't want to lose him as well. I guess, no, I got to honest, I wanted a piece of him to have and carry on in case he didn't make it through. It was, I was, dumb."

"Yeah, pretty much. Beautiful, but dumb." Rainbow got quiet for a moment then said, "I wish I could have done that."

"Now, I don't know if I made the right choice or not," Apple said desperately.

"You don't want it anymore?"

"I do, I do. Lord knows I do; but what if we lose? I conceived a child just to die. But then, what if we win? I got the farm and that's what I want anhows; but I know that'll go to my brother and his family. What is there out there for an unwed, teenage mother?"

"I don't know. Whatever you decided, whatever you choose, I support you one hundred percent. I'm also pretty sure Big Mac will as well . . . after he yells at you."

"So you think we're gonna win?"

"Knowing what I know now, there's no way we can fail."

Author's Notes:

This was suppossed to be part of last weeks chapter but I decided to leave for this week since I was already at 2300 words or so last time. Hopefully the split doesn't affect it too much.