A deer stag bent down and nibbled on some sweet grass near a small bubbling creek, oblivious to the danger that was stalking him. The snap of a twig caused the stag to snap to attention and look around in fear. For a while, the stag stayed tensed up, ready to flee, but nothing approached, and the deer could neither see nor smell anything. Soon, the deer went back to eating.

A young red female dragon whelp continued to watch the deer from high in a tree, waiting for the right time. The deer then moved from the grass to the creek and began to drink, putting himself in the perfect spot to be ambushed from above.

The deer bleated in alarm as he was forced violently to the ground by the sudden weight of the dragon jumping on him. His protests were quickly ended as the dragon silenced him with a well placed throat slash. The now dead body crumpled to the forest floor as the dragon roared in triumph.

The dragon huffed some of her long reddish-orange hair-like spines out of her eyes so she could admire her kill before she went about eating. The sound of a very sinister laugh put the dragon on edge, and she whipped her head around, trying to see or smell who would dare interrupt her meal. Neither seeing, hearing, nor smelling anything, she turned back to her meal.

The laughter started again, and the deer impossibly turned its head towards the dragon. She could hear the sound of the neck breaking. The dragon backed away from the deer in shock, stumbling backwards over a root. The soulless and sightless eyes continued to stare at the dragon, and an unearthly echo came out of its mouth. Why fight it?

Wouldn’t my blood taste heavenly on your lips? Come on... once you have a taste… you will have to have more and more… And the sound of my bones breaking? So very soothing and relaxing... Like the world's best massage.

The dragon let loose a flame to burn the abomination alive. She didn’t want to hear anymore from the undead deer.

Besides, no one will want you. Still the deer spoke. Who would want a killer around?

Nopony...The deer suddenly morphed into a pony, a very familiar tan furred and dark blue maned unicorn pony. It was her brother, and she had just sentenced him to death by claw, and now flame.

“No…” The dragon whispered, backing up in fright and horror.

Can’t you feel the rush of power when you breath flame? To see the light of life fade away… The flaming skull continued, even as the dragon tried to get up and away. Come now, there is nothing to fear.

“No, no, no... NOOOOOOO!” The dragon finally managed to get to her feet.

That’s right, run! The voice mocked as the dragon began to flee.

A beast! The voice shouted from everywhere, panicking the dragon even more.

A explosion of fire filled the dragon’s eyes, and the sounds of cruel laughter drowned out all other sounds.

“AAAH!” I snapped awake, screaming, a bit of my red flame escaping. I quickly shut my mouth, not wanting to set anything on fire, not that my room had a lot that was flammable. A fire-breathing dragon like myself learns really fast to not have anything flammable nearby for cases just like this… Or at least, I think so... I have never seen another dragon in my life. Heck, I’m the only known dragon in all of the Equus Nation. I was such an unknown that I was a scientific curiosity for a while.

I looked at the clock and saw that it was still late at night. I shivered as I tried to get the horrible vision and terrifying voice out of my head. Somehow, I managed, after some time of tossing and turning, to fall back into a restless sleep.

I woke up with a start just as the sun was peeking over the horizon. I sighed, as I knew that I would not be able to get back to sleep now. I got up, made myself breakfast, and went about my chores for the day. All the while, trying not to dwell on the night before, which was easier said than done.

I finished the last chore, just as the sun reached it peak. I half-heartedly congratulated myself, as I managed to get my chores done in record time. “Time for lunch, I guess,” I muttered as I went back inside, making a light lunch with a salad and an apple jam sandwich.

“Hey Dowsy!” I greeted my brother, Magic Dowser, or, to his ‘annoyance’, Dowsy, as he came in the door, just as I was finishing up my lunch. His saddle bag was filled with who knows what.

“Can you not call me that? I hate that nickname.”

“What brings you back? I thought that…” I stopped midsentence when I detected something very interesting. I took a stronger sniff, and, as I did, I noticed that my brother was starting to sweat. “Magic Dowser, do I detect a hint of a marefriend?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about, sis.”

I raised an eyebrow. It had been a while since I last saw him, but I didn’t think my brother would have forgotten that I have an excellent sense of smell. He may have masked it with shampoo and soap, but I could clearly smell the unmistakable scent of pony bucking.

“Okay… So who, and how long?”

“You and your fucking sense of smell.”

“I’m waiting…” I tapped my foot to accent my impatience.

“Fine!” He finally relented. “It’s a girl from school.”

“No fucking duh…” I rolled my eyes while grinning ear to ear. “So... what’s her name? And better yet, is she good in the sack?”

“RUBY!” Dowsy blushed hard. “Must you!?”

“Hey! I need something to fantasize about, because you know I got a lot of time…” I twiddled my claws, suddenly embarrassed, myself. “A lot of time to think, and all...”

“Damn it. This again, sis?” Dowsy shook his head. “Did you have that nightmare again!? Spill.”

“Yeah…” I admitted. I have no idea how he figured that out, but I knew better than to lie to Dowsy, especially about the nightmare. He could always tell when I’m trying to hide the fact that I had one. “But there was something new that happened.”

After he had grabbed a glass of cider from the fridge, Dowsy sat down across the table. “Okay, lay it on me.”

I sat down and began to describe the dream, and more specifically, the mocking voice. Dowsy never once reacted during the whole time that I related the dream, other than a few nods and sipping on his cider. After I was done, he stayed quiet for awhile, but I could see the gears in his head spinning.

“I suggest you go hunt, and use your flame…” He finally said.

“What!?” I screamed, gesturing towards town. “The town ponies are already leery around me, as it is!”

“I know that, Ruby! But you are my sister… forget what the fucking town ponies think!” Dowsy sighed, rubbing his head. “There is not much known about dragon biology, given that you are the only dragon to ever be seen or set foot in the E.N.… but, you know what I think? I think these dreams are your instincts saying you need to hunt, and that you need to use your flame…”

I sighed. If there ever was a reason that I should suppress using my flame, it was right in front of me. There, blazing across the right side of my brother’s muzzle and down to his neck, were splotches of scars, places where his fur never grew back. The places where his fur did grow back, it never grew back properly. It had been a miracle that his eye wasn’t blinded.

It all started the day I grew into a whelp. My third birthday… He had hugged me a bit too much after I changed... I was still reeling from the change and… the smell of burning fur and flesh… was bad. That same night, the nightmares began.

Dowsy was in the hospital for weeks, recovering… always asking for me, but I was too guilt-ridden, too horrified at what had happened. What I had done… It took months before I could see him, much less talk to him without constantly apologizing. It’s much better now; our relationship is like nothing ever happened, though I still feel guilty about it.

“When was the last time you used your flame? And I don’t mean by accident, after one of your dreams, or when you were sick.”

I tried to maintain eye contact, but couldn't. I could hear my brother sigh again as I did.

“Look, I’ll be honest, I don’t know if holding back your flame or desire to eat meat is healthy, or not… But clearly, it's eating you alive from the inside. You need to get over the guilt from what happened. It was an accident. You need to stop being afraid of your own flame.”

“But what if…”

“Ruby…” Dowsy cut me off. “The voice you heard… now, please hear me out... I think it was right. Dreams, especially nightmares, are the subconscious, trying to deal with issues that aren’t being worked out in the waking world. I think your nightmares are just your instincts, telling you that you are denying who you are as a dragon. Shooting out flames and hunting for prey is a part of who you are.”

“Yes, Professor.” I rolled my eyes. So, just because my brother is working on his graduate degree, suddenly, he’s soooo smart. “It’s just that...”

“Are manticores and wolves evil, just because they need to eat meat to survive?”

“Uh...no, but…” I tried to object; manticores and wolves had been known to attack ponies.

“Or pet owls? Cats?” Dowsy pressed his point harder. “And what of pet snakes, which are reptiles, such as you, yourself are?”

I closed my mouth, my protest dying. He had me, there… There were many animals that had to eat meat, and I knew there were several ponies in Castle Town that had animals like the ones he described as pets. Still, those were animals, and were not sentient… I could feel a headache coming on. Forget this… I was not going to deal with this anymore, right now.

“You know what...” I gave an exaggerated yawn, “I think I'm going to bed early; I really didn’t sleep well last night…”

“Ruby, putting off reconciling who you are is not…”

“I know, I know…” I waved my brother off, yawning for real this time. Not surprising, as I really didn’t get a restful sleep. I made my way to my bedroom, wrote in my diary, and was soon fast asleep.

Dear Diary,

I had that recurring nightmare again last night, though this time, something was different. A voice called out to me, mocking me. I woke up, screaming and spewing forth flame. I guess I should be thankful that my room is not only on the far side of the house, but also made from cinder blocks. It prevents Mother from hearing my screams, or seeing anything aflame. The last thing I want to do is explain that I’m having those dreams again. And Tartarus no on telling her that the dream brings feelings of power from shooting out flames and killing animals. (And double Tartarus no on telling her about that voice, or was it voices?) Not that I want to use my flames… not since that one day… I can’t; I’m afraid of hurting the ones I love... Even worse, my cravings for blood have been getting stronger and stronger…

Dowsy is worried over me, but… I know he means well, but I can’t. I just can’t use my flame or hunt… I’m so worried that once I start, something would break in me and… No. I can’t even write about it...

I hope I don’t have that dream again tonight. I don’t think I can handle it anymore.

Author's Notes:

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