The library itself was a lovely statement as to how bringing the three tribes together creates something magical. Well, sort of. Pegasi had nothing to do with this tree, but, you know what I'm getting at.

The history of Golden Oaks Library was a colorful one that went back about six-hundred years. Unicorns of the newly-formed Magus were still researching ways to increase the output of our growing agricultural efforts while the earth ponies toiled away in the fields, doing their best to make it all work. Food shortages were no longer a problem, but our exports weren't doing so great at the time.

Then some young unicorn named Flashy Fit got the genius idea of working with some earth pony farmers to figure out how to enhance their crops. He was no one of note really, a commoner who had a knack for magic good enough to get him accepted into the Magus. More an arcanist than a battlemage, though most Magus have to be capable of being either these days, and then some.

Up to that point, most unicorn scholars didn't really work with the other races on things magical in nature. They believed magic was their domain, no one else's, and no non-unicorn could ever understand how it worked. What they didn't realize was that it was the other way around: they needed to understand earth ponies.

Long story short, it took him a while, but he eventually cultivated a seed laced with a complicated array of magic that would grow with the seed itself. The end result was a mighty, massive oak tree that's only gotten bigger as the years have gone by. Golden Oaks Library. When he had presented his new spell, unicorns praised him and earth ponies embraced him. The spell was more of a miracle than he had ever expected it to be.

The trees and crops that grew with a more refined version of the spell placed upon them couldn't speak, but earth ponies could feel them easier. They could tell when individual plants were thirsty, they could cultivate the land to perfectly suit their needs, and they could more efficiently infuse their own natural earth pony magic into them. It was a revolution in agriculture that's still being thoroughly refined to this day.

Golden Oaks Library, however, was a prodigal accomplishment in and of itself. His original version gave it such vitality that, even with the inside hollowed out and carved into a huge home, the tree still lived. Enchantments to make it fireproof and more sturdy than normal held as if the tree were a living arcane sponge, crafted for the sake of embracing any sort of magic cast upon it.

I didn't know any of this at the time, mind you. So when I took Spike to the bathroom so we could both take a quick bath, I wasn't aware of the raw historical majesty I was residing in.

Unfortunately I didn't have time to be very thorough, so a quick wash for myself and a scrubdown for Spike would have to do. It wasn't until I got out of the bath that I realized just how messed up my mane was.

I looked down at Spike with a bemused smirk. "So that's what you were laughing at me about."

All I got were giggles in response.

I didn't have the time to really fix my mane, so I ran a brush and comb through it ramshackle until it at least looked somewhat alright. Not up to the true noble standard, but then I'm not in Canterlot. Fuck the noble standard!

And now...the suit. I kept spares of various colors, I even had a pinstripe one that was black and red with a matching fedora, though I didn't often diverge from my usual black with white undershirt. The blue suit I'd thrown in my suitcase wasn't bad or anything, I just prefer black. Blue just isn't 'me'. Insert goth joke here. It just doesn't capture the true darkness in my soul!

I had to be careful about Spike's curiosity regarding something I had buried down deeper in my clothes. Last thing I wanted him doing is picking up one of my .22s or, even worse, my revolver, and fiddling with it. Even though they're currently unloaded, I had two full boxes of ammunition along with them as a just-in-case, as well as a third box just for the kind of caliber ammunition my revolver took. He was smart enough...given enough time, he'd be able to figure out how to load them. Television didn't help in that matter, I'm sure he could figure it out just based on what he's seen actors do in movies.

The trip to Miss Rarity's personal business, once I had my suit back on, was fairly quick. Known as Carousel Boutique - though I'm not sure why since it didn't spin and it certainly didn't make jaunty little fair jingles - it was a shockingly gaudy and out-of-place building compared to the vast majority of the rest of the town. It would've fit in better in Canterlot, or the more dated neighborhoods of Manehattan.

However, since I'd fallen behind on my schedule, she was no longer there. Fortunately, I had a good idea of where she'd be. I had to pick up the pace, though. I was losing daylight and judging by the position of the sun in the sky, it was going to start getting dark in a couple hours.

Rarity had been given the job of decorating Town Hall, and judging by the colorful decor on the outside, she had quite an artistic mind! A bit dramatic as well, but that wasn't really a bad thing.

"Whatcha think, Spike? Think it looks good so far?"

"Uh-huh!" he said, jumping to his feet and holding up the now fairly dried-off scroll, unrolling it and pointing to the white-furred pony listed there. "She's rilly pretty."

I just smiled and nodded in agreement. "Yup, she is! Why don't we go meet her?" I said, pushing one of the double doors to the building open and stepping inside.

Even on the inside, Town Hall was looking rather snazzy! Judging by the tone of the mare standing in the center, cycling through various colors of ribbons, the job wasn't even close to done either. I glanced up at the numerous decorations and tools held in her magic and found myself a bit impressed, all things considered. Since she wasn't a Royal Guard or even a student at any mage's colleges, her overall magical power likely wasn't anything worth mentioning. But the amount of focus she had to have in order to hold so many things at once and manipulate them without even dedicating her full attention to the task...!

I suppose it could've just been attributed to the natural talent inherent in her cutie mark, but still, the average unicorn that could benefit from being able to do something like this isn't really capable of pulling off this kind of feat. She was exceptional, whether she knew it or not.

Oh, and she was absolutely gorgeous from polished and filed horn to brushed and shaved fetlocks, but that was obvious from the moment I laid eyes on her. Shame she put on so much make-up and eyeliner though, I could imagine her without all that and I think she'd look even better with a more au naturel presentation. Even that lovely styled purple mane was just magnificent, and really highlighted an already lovely visage!

Just as you might expect, her tail did the same for that plush ass of hers. Heh, like a pair of marshmallows, they looked so soft and perky...! I had the strangest urge to toss a bit at her backside just to see how far it'd bounce.

I'm a real ass-mare, in more than one way.

She seemed to be entirely absorbed in her work, so much so that even when Spike and I approached, and she turned with her side facing us, she still didn't take notice of us at all. I tried the age-old method of clearing my throat, and I didn't even get a flick of an ear to acknowledge that she heard me.

The moment I stepped up to her and tapped her on her wither though, she damn near jumped out of her skin and spun around to face me! Her eyes were wide with shock and she had to take a few deep breaths to steady her breathing, but other than that she seemed okay...aside from the vaguely dirty look she gave me.

"One should not sneak up on a lady like that!" she exclaimed, huffing and holding a hoof to her chest. "You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

I just smirked and shrugged a bit. "Bit of a health hazard when you get so absorbed in your work you cease taking notice of the outside world, huh? I tried to get your attention from a distance, but you weren't having it."

"Oh! Oh, I see. I apologize, Miss-hm?" she said, only to notice Spike peeking at her from over my wither. "Well, who might this be? Is that a dragon?!"

"Drake, actually. A drakeling, if you want to be perfectly accurate," I explained, standing still as she walked over to one side of me. "Spike, say hello to the nice lady!"

"Hullo," he said, giving that goofy kind of smile children tend to do when they have childhood infatuation welling up in them. "M' name's Spike."

The effect was immediate. Rarity d'aww'ed and Spike laughed as she sat down and squeezed his semi-pudgy face with her forehooves.

"Oh my goodness, he is adorable! Just look at his pudgy little belly and shiny, sparkly scales~!" she cooed, grinning happily while Spike fidgeted and laughed in her grasp.

I just nodded and looked back at him with a fond smile. "That's my son for you. I've had him since the day he hatched."

"Really? I've heard about something like that before, where-...oh my!" she said, suddenly coming out of her adorableness-induced fawning to give me her attention instead. "You're Twilight Sparkle? The Lady Twilight Sparkle, of House Sparkle?!"

"The one and only. Why?"

"You live in Canterlot!" she exclaimed suddenly, her eyes almost seeming to sparkle in the artificial indoor lights while she stared off into space. "The glamour, the fashion, oh the sheer sophistication of it all! I've always dreamed of living there!"

The words 'suck-up floozy' immediately entered my mind, only to be banished just as fast. She had the appearance and moved with the grace of a mare thoroughly trained with Canterlot noble standards, but the question was, did she teach herself or did her parents teach her? She did run her own independent business....

"I just can't wait to hear all about it! And you...you hatched a dragon egg! Something nopony's ever done before!" she said with a wide smile, trying to regain her composure in front of me. "Celestia's personal student, too. Goodness, you have quite the portfolio."

I was suddenly jerked back to reality when I felt her forehooves pressing against my withers, her muzzle inches from mine. I ducked back more out of alarm than anything else. I certainly wasn't embarrassed by her lips only being inches away from mine. Nothing of the sort.

"A-ah, well, while I would love to indulge your inquiries, and the praise is appreciated, I must stick to business for now," I said, clearing my throat. "I'm already behind schedule. Perhaps later, we can talk?"

"That would be wonderful," she said, her smile never fading. Seemed she had herself back under control. "I'd love to invite you over for tea sometime!"

"Sounds like a date!"

The rest of our conversation was all about what she'd gotten done so far, and what she had planned. It took around an hour. Unfortunately, that meant it was about five o' clock, and the sun was getting close to setting. Spike was overdue for a nap, but in Rarity's presence, he seemed all too eager to give her his full attention.

"Yer rilly pretty!" I heard him say, while he was sitting on her back.

"Aww, thank you darling! I do my best." she said, while floating him over onto my back once more.

I gave him a moment to steady himself and sit down before turning towards the door, giving her a simple nod. "We'll be going now. Thank you for your contribution to the Summer Sun Celebration."

We left without fanfare, and Rarity returned to her work before I'd even closed the door behind us. I took the time to tease 'widdle Spikey-wikey' about his crush while we made our way to the final destination of the day, not counting tracking down Pinkie Pie before it got too late. Hopefully she wouldn't be difficult to track down.

The path to Fluttershy's cottage and animal shelter went right past the orchard and a few other smaller farms that surrounded that side of Ponyville. I actually had to stop to converse with one Golden Harvest to figure out exactly where I was going. Soon we were pretty much on the outskirts of the town, walking right alongside the edge of the Everfree Forest itself.

I'm not one to really judge someone based on first impressions, but this Fluttershy must have a set of huge balls to go with her vagina just like I do, if she's willing to live so close to a place full of manticores and timberwolves.

When we finally reached our destination, the sun was already beginning to creep down over the horizon, and the lamps lining the pathways were beginning to start up to make up for the dimming light. The orange-red glow gave a kind of ideal tint to Fluttershy's entire shelter area, making it seem entirely like the most idyllic place one could live. Now if only it weren't for the overwhelming stench of various animals....

There was a loud chorus of birdsong whistling through the air, getting louder the closer we got to the cottage. It certainly wasn't the sort of thing that occurred naturally, given how harmonious the tune was...save for maybe a couple of birds. I'm pretty sure my acute hearing picked up at least three of them that were drastically off-key.

By the time we reached the source of all the music, only one bird was still having trouble, and the music had started once again. That was when I saw her.

I stared. I couldn't not stare. It was like seeing yellow and pink occurring naturally and realizing 'nature is magnificent and gorgeous'. I didn't even notice that I was walking closer to this source of sheer beauty until I felt Spike's claws pulling at the part of my mane running down the back of my neck.

What the fuck is a supermodel doing working with animals? Her picture on my scroll had to be outdated, it didn't do her justice!

"Er, excuse me, Miss-"

She damn near rocketed up into the treetops the moment my words reached her ears. Her wings flared in that reflexive fight-or-flight instinct we all had, followed by her spinning around to face me. All of her birds took off flying from being startled.

I would say that I'm noticing a theme, but so far it's just been her and Rarity that've jumped like frightened kittens. I wouldn't call that a theme so much as a coincidence, unless you count Pinkie Pie for some reason. She was certainly shocked by my presence, though the source of that shock is entirely unknown to me.

I watched her hide behind her long pink mane, luxuriously smooth locks hiding most of her face and one of her eyes from view as she turned away from me. I couldn't help but notice how adorable she was and how timid she was being and how can she make slouching look alluring?!

"...Alright then," I said, trying to regain my composure. "My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I'm here to check in with one Miss Fluttershy to determine the current state of the Summer Sun Celebration's musical arrangements. I assume you're the pony I'm looking for?"

I figured being more formal and business-like would help her open up to me, but I could barely hear her muttering behind her mane. She glanced over at me with her one exposed eye here and there, but for the most part she had trouble looking at me, let alone conversing with me. Then Spike leaned to one side and waved to her.

Her shy and reserved demeanor suddenly turned a full one-eighty on me, and she took to the skies with a wide gasp of delight. I stepped back a bit as she rapidly fluttered over to us, hovering over me and looking down at Spike with the most adoring eyes I've ever encountered.

"A baby dragon!" she squealed, landing next to me and staring at Spike with a wide grin.

It was Rarity all over again. She cooed and fawned over him for a time until I got her to give him some space. At least now she was willing to talk to me, instead of trying (and failing) to hide in plain sight.

"So...those birds sounded wonderful," I said, trying to get things back on track with her. "How'd you teach them to do that?"

She was still very timid and shy, but at least she didn't duck away from me like she did before.

"I-I told them how to do it..."

"You...told them? How does that work?"

She fidgeted a little, staring down at her hooves. "...I can understand them, and they can understand me."

I stared at her for a moment, my head slowly tilting to the side as I attempted to fathom such an absurd notion. Did she mean she was just really good at training animals, or was she being literal? I suppose, given how shy she is, she wouldn't have told me such a strange thing without totally being serious about it....

"Really? Huh," I said, clearing my throat and glancing around while Spike twiddled his claws on my back. "Forgive me if this sounds mean, but that sounds a bit unbelievable. I've never heard of a pony being able to actually converse with animals."

She looked my way for only a moment, and I feared she'd clammed up again. I looked around the area again and eyeballed several of the birds beginning to gather around us once more, and an idea sprung to mind almost instantly.

"Perhaps a demonstration is in order? Just to prove it to me?" I offered. "Honestly, I'm a bit curious now myself."

She just sat there for a moment, unresponsive. I tried to remain patient and give her time to gather her wits, but it seemed I needed to be insistent.

"I really would prefer a demonstration, Miss Fluttershy."

"Weren't the birds enough?" she asked suddenly.

I quickly shook my head. "Sorry, but I'd just like something more spontaneous. They could've been trained."

I'm sure she took offense to the idea that she might be lying, but I really did need to be sure. If she really could talk to animals and understand them, that's...well, I'm not sure exactly what that might mean, but I'd certainly wonder how many actually knew about this extraordinary ability and just said nothing to anyone.

She pawed at the ground with her hoof for a moment, then cleared her throat. "Aaaangel!" she called out. "Could you come here for a moment please?"

Mere moments later, a small white rabbit came bounding our way, summoned by the call of his caretaker. He stared at me for a moment, his little bunny nose wiggling as he sniffed the air to pick up my scent. He was kind of cute! Now if only he didn't have that scowl.

She spoke to him as if he were just another pony, and much to my shock he squeaked and chattered at her in return. She told him to do things in distinctly non-trainer-like ways, telling him to hop up onto my back and hop on Spike's head, then on mine, then back to her, and he did it all with...well okay, not zero complaints, just minimal complaints.

She repeated this demonstration with several other animals as we conversed, her interactions with her closest of friends seeming to help her loosen up with me. Not overly so, but enough that we could at least sit down and have a normal conversation.

Spike, during all of this, had made quite a few new friends once we'd made our way to her cottage. At first the little squirrels, rabbits, puppies and kittens were instinctively scared of Spike, but with a little reassurance from Fluttershy, they approached him. What happened after that was just...okay, why is my son so Celestia-damned adorable all the time? Seriously, they were swarming over him and running around playing tag with him all over the house! It was like watching him get assaulted by fuzzballs. Adorably cuddly fuzzballs.

"So, I guess you weren't lying! I apologize," I said as we both took a seat at her kitchen table. "I didn't mean to insult you."

"Oh, it's fine," she said, that soft voice barely audible over the clamor in the other room, but with my experiments with manipulating my own senses, I could make out what she was saying easily. "Most ponies don't believe me. They just dismiss the whole idea."

"Even the ponies in Ponyville? You must not talk to them much."

She just gave me a nod, and silence fell between us for a time. I needed to find something to talk about at the very least, just sitting here like this was already getting awkward. Then a devilish idea hit me, one I was already considering from the moment I got a feel for her personality, but now was a perfect chance to put it into motion.

I rarely do anything that may be of personal benefit to me on accident. I do not simply stumble upon fortune, I plant the seeds that will most likely bear fruit for me down the line, and I harvest them accordingly. Time for me to plant a seed and see what comes of it.

"So, what kind of work do you do to afford all this? Modeling?"

Her face lit up like a tomato, and she vigorously shook her head. "O-oh, no no, n-no I could never-I mean-!"

"Whoa, whoa!" I said, holding my forehooves up to try to calm her down. "Sorry, didn't mean to upset you! Just, you know, with the perfectly-groomed fur, the long silky mane and tail...I figured maybe you did photos or something."

Her blush didn't abate. If anything, I think it got worse, and while her lips were moving, no noise was coming out. Perhaps I'd gone too far?

I cleared my throat and shifted in my seat. "I feel I must apologize again. I'm sorry if I've made you uncomfortable."

"N-n-no, it's fine, I'm just...I'm not used to ponies just saying things like that about me," she muttered, sinking a little lower in her seat and hiding behind her mane once again. "Rarity says the same thing. She says I have a lot of natural beauty."

"Well, she's right! You're lovely." I said, a wide grin on my face.

Aaand seed...planted. She turned red as a quality tomato once more and cowered away from me, but she couldn't hide the small smile she was sporting! She liked the flirtatious compliment even if it made her twist around on the inside.

Unfortunately, I took notice of the time when Spike came in, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He was getting sleepy, and that meant that he needed a nap. I don't know what was going through my head at the time, probably frustration with having wasted the entire day just tracking these ponies down and being held up by some of them, but I'd let my guard down enough to get lost in just chit-chatting with Fluttershy, listening to her stories about her animal friends. Chiropractic work on a bear? I'd have to see it to believe it!

The sun was almost completely down outside, and high in the sky, the moon hung overhead. I stared at the mark adorning the surface, the Mare in the Moon, and something deep down inside of me became uneasy. It would've been easy to just dismiss it as nothing, but I trusted my gut, my paranoia. It hadn't failed me thus far. Still, I had nothing to go on...so I simply had to wait. Perhaps if I was lucky, nothing would happen at all.

Fluttershy opted to walk us back to the library, since I both didn't have the guards with me and I didn't know the exact way back from how far out we are. Plus it was getting dark out, and despite the big shiny moon in the sky, it was just safer to travel in a group, albeit only a group of three.

Along the way, I learned more about Fluttershy's history with animals. The story about Rainbow Dash and the Sonic Rainboom, how Fluttershy plummeted to the ground, unable to stop herself, only to get caught by a huge gathering of...butterflies. Okay, is the rest of the world outside of the big cities just one giant world of childhood whimsy, or is this a more recent thing? All the goodness got washed out of the big cities and the rest of the world is picking up the slack, maybe?

I vaguely remembered the Sonic Rainboom incident, myself. I recall being indoors when it happened. Made a deal go bad, I think it was...pony trafficking. I was there to make sure shit didn't go south, but everyone on both sides of the deal were really tense and nervous, probably from some of the recent cop activity in the area. They thought I was a rat because of how young I was! Then there was this big technicolor light flashing in from outside, and suddenly guns were drawn, I heard a few go off, and I began mashing ponies into the walls and ceiling with my magic!

I came back for a couple of them for later experimentation. Took some doing to get them back to my lab though. Five ponies tied up in a room, with me experimenting on their minds one after the other? Why don't you just give me a happy ending while you're at it, universe? I'm already having a fantastic time, may as well put a little cherry on top of that sundae! Even though I was like...eight, at the time.

Either way, we made it back to the library much quicker than when Spike and I had made our way to Fluttershy's cottage. Spike had already fallen asleep on my back, only jostled awake here and there from some faltering steps of mine. It wasn't exactly all that easy to see in some places. This town needed better nighttime lighting.

Fluttershy bid us good night, and I returned the gesture before stepping into the quiet of the library. It was dark, and the lights were out, so I had to light up my horn in order to see anything. That was when everything went bad. I swear I'm still getting palpitations from it to this day!

The lights suddenly flashed on throughout the library, and a loud scream of 'Surprise!' from numerous voices filled the tree. Old honed reflexes kicked in and, lacking anyone close enough to punch in the face and then bolt, I quickly surrounded Spike and myself in magic and teleported out of the library.

I know they weren't there now, but at the time all I could think of was that I'd walked into an ambush with Spike on my back, tommy guns and pistols glinting in the sudden and overwhelming lights. I was panting from the sudden surge of adrenaline, and as I surveyed my surroundings, I found a distinct lack of gunfire heading my way. Just a commotion inside the library and a shocked-awake dragon in the beginning stages of a full-on blubber-fest.

I quickly brought my drowsy charge around in front of myself and sat down, holding him in my forelegs and rocking him back and forth while cooing small reassurances to him. He was sniffling and letting out those little 'I'm going to cry and it's gonna be really loud and grating so you'd better not stop trying to make me not cry' hiccups, and I'd become so caught up in trying to calm him down that I didn't notice the library door opening.

"Ohmigosh, I'm so so so so so sorry!" someone called out to me.

A brief flash of anger shot through me, and I snapped my gaze up towards the door...only to see a few concerned ponies with party hats on their heads peeking out at Spike and I. Where did that-

"We didn't mean to scare you!"

I'm fairly sure I jumped five feet into the air when I heard that voice right next to me. I whipped my head around to give her the nastiest glare I could while Spike began to whimper anew in my forelegs. Much to my surprise however, she wasn't where I knew, for a fact, she should've been. She was supposed to be directly to my right.

Somehow, she'd gotten around to my left without even causing a gust of wind, for how fast she had to have been moving to get there. I would've been able to feel it on my fur at the very least, but there was just nothing!

"Oh geez, I'm still doing it! I'm sorry, I was just concerned because you just disappeared like BOOSH!" she said, hopping up on her hindlegs while thrusting her forelegs into the air. "Then you were out here and he was starting to cry and I totally didn't mean to do that, but-!"

I resisted the urge to punch her in the face to make her back off. Trust me, it's a very strong reflex when ponies surprise me and then keep on pushing it without giving me a proper chance to calm down, let alone scaring me once, catching up to me, and darting around me like a caffeinated five-year-old! Don't even get me started on how dark it is out! I couldn't even see her that well.

"STOP! Just...just give me a moment," I said, taking a few deep breaths and rocking Spike in my forelegs to help calm him down some more. "You scared both of us out of our skin, just about."

I quickly lit up my horn so I could get a better look at her. The moment her face came into view, I could see the genuine concern in her rather expressive face. I tried to restrain my volcanic magma that was my anger to a mere powder keg, and nodded once to her, taking a few more deep breaths for good measure to steady myself before speaking a single word.

"You're Pinkie Pie, I believe," I said slowly, gently floating Spike onto my back as I got to four hooves once more. "You're the one in charge of setting up the traditional party that's supposed to go all night long, if I'm remembering correctly."

She just nodded, glancing at Spike worriedly while Fluttershy rushed over to figure out what was going on. She'd probably heard the shouting and come running back. Personally, I found that surprising, she didn't seem like the type to go running towards commotions.

The pink pony simply nodded, seeming to be entirely different from how she was when I first met her. Gone was the pronking energy of a superequine party mare. Now she just seemed despondent from what her actions had wrought. Guess I couldn't leave her like that, and I'd barely even noticed Fluttershy consoling Spike right next to me.

"Yeah, it was supposed to be a big surprise to make you smile, because I'm everypony's friend but I didn't know you, so I figured it'd be a good idea to surprise you with this party instead of holding it at Sugarcube Corner like we usually do," she said, rambling on while the sound of a balloon deflating coincided with her mane and tail going flat and smooth. "I'm really, really sorry!"

Okay first of all, what the fuck just happened with her mane and tail? I'd be tempted to make a fart joke if it were just her tail, but her mane actually swished and wavered like it was blowing air out of itself! Just...what?! I don't...oh, fuck it. Really not important right now. I was fairly tired, Spike was definitely tired and needed some sleep, and I really didn't give a fuck about magical logic-defying manes and ponies at the moment.

"It's...fine, Miss Pie. I just don't react well to surprises like that," I tried to explain, glancing back at Spike. "Neither do young children who are half-asleep. I would, however, still like to participate...just as soon as I get this little guy to bed."

There were no complaints as I began walking toward the library with Fluttershy and Pinkie at my sides. Pinkie had cheered up at least a little, but she was still extremely apologetic. Fluttershy was just enthralled with her ability to soothe Spike's worries enough that he damn near fell asleep right in front of her. I certainly didn't mind, he needed to be put to bed anyways. It'd been a long day for both of us.

Various party-goers apologized as we entered, and I quickly put their concern to rest. Proclaiming I'd be back, I walked past everyone and headed upstairs with a curious Spike in tow. He grumbled and wobbled in my grasp as I floated him into a basket I'd bought a month prior to start getting him used to sleeping alone, and gently tucked him in with his favorite blanket.

Even now, with him all nestled in, he was very hesitant to sleep without me nearby. I laid down next to his basket and gave him a small nuzzle, laying my head down next to his while he grasped at the foreleg I extended over his torso. My horn lit up with a gentle glow while I hummed a soft lullaby for him, and I floated over the old Smartypants doll that used to be mine before things went...yeah. I had no further use for it, so why shouldn't I have passed it on?

As he dozed off, I cast a veil of silence over my bed and Spike's basket, rendering both of them deaf to the world. It would be bad form for me to sleep on the eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, but as I said before, it'd been a long day. Some sleep was in order. Plus, my hindleg was aching again, and another one of my painkillers would make me pretty drowsy.

Still...there was a party going on downstairs, and I didn't want to be a party-pooper. Maybe just a couple drinks and some good company would help me relax a bit.

I laid there, watching my son fall asleep in front of me, and when I felt his breathing become more rhythmic and peaceful, I carefully extracted my foreleg from his grip and sat up, replacing my foreleg with Smartypants as smoothly as in a Daring Do novel.

I heard the door to my temporary room crack open, the noisy creaking only heard out of one ear until I stood up, my head slipping out of the veil just in time to hear someone peeking their way into the room, the thrum of the party music downstairs seeping in through the doorway.

"Everything alright in here?" I heard Pinkie ask, her cautious smile barely visible around the edge of the door.

I calmly stepped away from Spike, leaving him to his slumber. "Yes, everything's fine. I cast a veil of silence over him to block out incoming sounds, so you don't have to worry about keeping your voice down."

"Huh. You can do that? That's pretty nifty."

Rainbow Dash came waltzing in, a cup of cider in her hoof as she pushed the door open all the way. She seemed at least slightly tipsy, but not so much that she was really off-kilter. Just more liberal with her tongue, as most that imbibe alcohol are wont to do.

"Dang it, Rainbow! Mind yer manners more, wouldja?"

Aaand there was AJ. Then Fluttershy, and Rarity. What were they all doing here? Rarity and Fluttershy seemed entranced by the cute sight of Spike calmly snoozing away in his basket, though I urged them not to get too close for fear of entering the veil of silence and waking him up. Rainbow just knocked her drink back while AJ stayed at her side, just in case the cider really got to her.

Pinkie just began to hop up and down in front of me, grinning and urging me to come downstairs to join the party. I didn't resist. Really, I was just confused as to why they were all rather insistent on coming up to see me. Then again I suppose I was the new mare in town...or well, they thought I was a mare, and that was perfectly fine with me.

The party entered full swing now that everything seemed to be okay, and I wasn't shy about taking various ponies as dancing partners. I tend to suck horribly at dancing when I'm left to my own devices, but I've danced enough to know how to keep in-rhythm with my partners. Not that these rural folk knew any intricate dance moves, the most complex it got that night was a few twirls, courtesy of myself, Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie, who seemed to just know all sorts of bizarre dances. To this day, I'm convinced she made up almost all of them.

About two hours later though, I took my leave and headed back upstairs, letting Rainbow Dash know I was going upstairs. Applejack was staying close to her, keeping her away from the alcohol as much as possible, since it wouldn't be appropriate to show up a bit sloshed when Celestia raises the sun in such a glorious display. I assumed that by telling her the others would eventually find out as well, and since I was really starting to feel the fatigue, I didn't feel bad about just kinda disappearing from the party like that.

I didn't go to bed immediately though. I was still wound up and feeling at least a little sweaty from all the dancing, so I hopped in the shower, gave myself a quick scrubbing, then threw my undershirt and my pants and underwear back on. What? I had spare clothes, but just enough for the week, I hadn't brought a bunch of extras! I needed to make it last, after the mud puddle incident earlier.

I retrieved my metal cigar case from the pocket of my suit top and grabbed one of them from inside of it, tucking the case away once more and heading out onto the library's upper floor patio. I shot a tiny bolt of fire from the tip of my horn to the end of my cigar and brought it to my lips, biting off my end of it and spitting it out over the guardrail. I took a long, deep drag and felt the smooth cherry-scented smoke filling my lungs.

I'm not any kind of connoisseur of cigars, mind you. I went with them because they're at least better smelling than cigarettes and cause significantly less ill disgust whenever I have to pick up their scent. Why did I take up smoking? Two words: stress relief. However, I made the mistake of trying out some particularly expensive cigars on a few occasions, and then finding a way to buy some of my own.

Now I buy cigars that cost approximately twelve bits each. I buy them in cases of twenty. I'm just thankful I don't smoke very often, or else this would be an atrociously expensive habit. Besides, if I really wanted a cheaper alternative, I'd just smoke weed all the time. Stuff can fuck with your long-term memory over years of steady use, but damn if it doesn't really help mellow me out!

I tend to get lost in thought when I'm enjoying one of my cigars. Usually I'm always keeping myself busy with something at least a bit important, thus I always had something to focus my thoughts on, and this time was no exception. I stared up at the moon, my physical motions with the cigar on auto-pilot as I just sat there with my upper half leaning against the guardrail...thinking about the Mare in the Moon.

How lonely must she be up there, in the silent vacuum of space? No sounds, no one to talk to, only the memories of those she once knew, now long gone...it sounded awful. At least a pony stabbing you is a death you can face. Being sealed away from pretty much every living thing in the world...that's like a death of the mind and soul.

That's assuming she's been awake all this time, staring down at us in what had most likely become a mad rage...well, if alicorns really succumbed to madness the same way us normal ponies do, anyway. Also assuming that she was real, though at this point I was suspicious enough to believe that there was a strong possibility of it.

I just kept delving deeper into random thoughts about the Mare in the Moon after that. Where did she go to the bathroom? Was she even capable of such a thing after a thousand years of no sustenance of any kind? Was she even still alive after all this time on the moon? Numerous thoughts.

Eventually I felt the siren's call of bed in my eyes, and I snuffed the fiery heat in the end of my cigar and carried it back inside, slipping it back into my case. Not smart to waste expensive cigars, even if it's three-fourths gone. I checked the door to my room and secured the lock before slipping out of my clothes and crawling under the covers of my bed. I think I was out the moment my head hit the pillow.

I awoke with a start, feeling someone shaking me in my sleep. Once again, my natural reflexes almost kicked in, but I snapped my eyes open and, against every instinct my life had hammered into me, took a moment to take in who was jostling me around. Of course, it was Pinkie, and I had to consciously force the tension out of my body before I did something bad.

Wait...wasn't my door locked? How did she-? Oh, fuck it. I was too tired to give a shit.

In any case, it was just her, and she was trying to wake Spike and I up because it was time for everyone to gather at the meeting hall. I rushed into the bathroom to give my mane a quick brushing, swished some mouthwash around in my muzzle, then headed out with a sleepy Spike on my back. Neither of us really got enough rest, but by the time we got there, I was awake enough.

Ponies were crowding into the meeting hall en-masse, even though the moon was still high in the sky. It was giving off an unusual amount of illumination, but I held my paranoia at bay for the time being. I made sure to give the Mare in the Moon up there a nasty glare, however. That was when I noticed it.

The Mare in the Moon was gone.

Oh no don't worry, it was totally fine. I was completely cool about it. I wasn't freaking the fuck out on the inside! Why would I do that?! I was only dealing with the sudden realizations that one, the story about an alicorn that plotted to doom the world to a permanent starving, freezing death and thus getting sealed in the moon was actually true, and two, she was no longer where she was supposed to be. No big deal at all!

I suddenly became very aware of just how naked I was in regards to weaponry. Still, at least when I showed up at the meeting hall, the two guards assigned to me had already showed up. We exchanged brief greetings, but they both expressed concerns regarding the fact that Celestia's escort was noticeably missing.

I quickly told them to do a once-around the meeting hall before heading inside with me, and I calmly waited with Spike on my back. He seemed unnerved by the missing image in the moon as well, once I pointed it out to him anyways, and he nestled in against the back of my head and neck while we stood there waiting.

That gave me an idea though...but it was only a guess. What if Nightmare Moon didn't know that her imprisonment caused a mark to cover the moon? If she wasn't aware, then acting suspiciously wouldn't be to my benefit. Tipping her off to the fact that I knew who she was could work, but...ugh, I was overthinking it again. The same rule applied: without anything to work off of, I could only wait to see what would come, and plan appropriately. I lacked any other way to get information, so it would have to do.

When they returned with nothing to report, we headed inside, and they fanned out behind the crowd while I waded into the crowd, moving closer to the front where the ponies I'd gotten more familiar with the previous day were all gathered close to each other at. Well, the majority of them anyways. Fluttershy was off to the side of the stage, with all of her bird friends roosting nearby, ready to sing for our glorious omnipotent ruler. Rarity was waiting up on the balcony, prepared to pull the curtains back to reveal her to everyone in dramatic flair.

"Isn't this exciting?! Are you excited? 'Cuz I'm excited-"

I rapidly tuned Pinkie's ramblings out after giving her a cursory glance out of the corner of my eye. I could easily see her becoming the most annoying pony I've ever known. I mean, aside from Blueblood. Annoying in a more 'please stop talking' way rather than 'oh sweet Celestia if you don't die right now I'm going to kill myself'.

The birds began to tweet and chirp in a harmonious tune to Fluttershy's hoof motions while Mayor Mare walked out on the stage. Being totally honest here, Mayor Mare looks fucking fantastic for an almost-forty-year-old. Seriously, I'd hit that ten different ways if given the opportunity. Just...mmm! Lemme just grab that body for a moment and show you you've still got it honey, c'mon over here...!

Guh. Ahem. She was talking, right, very impolite to tune out on everyone like that. I should pay attention, especially since she was currently in the process of revealing Princess Celestia behind the curtains. I waited tensely while Spike pressed just a little closer to me, both of us dreading what might be back there.

The curtains were pulled back with just a tug of a rope, and the spotlight overhead panned over the balcony to reveal...nothing. Just Rarity, standing there just as shocked as we were that the Princess wasn't where she was supposed to be. There seemed to be a bit of that going around this morning. I glanced to my two guards cautiously, and they both met my gaze, the two stallions visibly tensing and holding their spears closer to themselves. The absence of Celestia's Honor Guard only made the situation worse.

My guards began to move out of sight, trying to find an inconspicuous way to get up to the balcony while Rarity began to walk behind the curtains to have a look around for herself. I quickly took notice of the welling unrest in the crowd, which was already wound up enough despite most of them staying up through the night in celebration. I reflexively looked back at Spike to make sure he was right where he should be, fearing he might get lost in the crowd otherwise.

The mayor quickly urged us to calm down, since there just had to be a logical explanation for all of this. I'm sure there was, but whether it was acceptable to everyone was another matter entirely.

"Ooh, I love this game!" I heard Pinkie call out, looking around the hall with the eagerness of a child. "Is she hiding?!"

I don't...I'm not gonna question it. She's one weird, immature little mare.

Fortunately, Rarity stepped out onto the balcony again. She seemed confused and alarmed, and in her situation, I know I'd be confused too.

"She's gone!" she semi-shouted out for all to hear. The collective gasps of the crowd rapidly welled into a budding panic that Pinkie seemed completely immune to. Leave it to her to go against the grain...or, y'know, be completely oblivious.

"Ooh, she's good!" I heard her say. I'm pretty sure she legitimately thought the Princess was hiding somewhere.

Then the dark, starry mist showed up, making Rarity back away reflexively as it coiled around itself and swirled atop the balcony. I could feel the magic in the air coalescing into that sparkling mist, only to burst outward in a...well, surprisingly anti-climactic show of a more taxing transmogrification spell. At least, I think that was what it was. It certainly wasn't parlor tricks that brought Nightmare Moon to the balcony.

"Oh, my beloved subjects~!" I heard her say, her voice laced with the kind of false enthusiasm I found being vomited from the mouths of ill-intent nobles almost every day. "It's been so long since I've seen your precious little sun-loving faces."

"What did you do with our Princess?!" I heard Rainbow say, just before Applejack restrained her from charging head-first into what would likely have been a very brief and very painful encounter for her.

Rarity's statement that she was gone, and Rainbow's curiosity as to what Nightmare Moon had done with Princess Celestia must've meant that Celestia had shown up at some point, likely while I was asleep. That meant Celestia wasn't just on her way, she was here and she disappeared, coinciding with Nightmare Moon's appearance. Not good no matter which way you slice it.

"Mmm-hm-ha-ha-hah~!" she liltingly chuckled, gazing down directly at all of us, though I purposely stepped closer to the larger part of the crowd so I didn't stand out quite so much. "Why? Am I not royal enough for you?" she asked, her eyes narrowing just slightly. "Don't you know who I am?"

I was going to say something, but Pinkie quickly beat me to it.

"Ooh, ooh! More guessing games! Um-"

Oh sweet Celestia, Pinkie, don't.

"-Hokey Smokes! How 'bout...Queen Meanie!"

Someone's gonna die right here in front of Spike, and if I'm being totally honest about it, she was asking for it. She really was.

"No! Black Snooty! Black Snooty!"

Pff-okay, that one was actually kinda funny.

Applejack mercifully shoved an apple (or was it a cupcake?) in Pinkie's muzzle to silence her, and I restrained the desire to sigh with relief. At least she wasn't a big black scorch mark on the floor yet. I really didn't want Spike exposed to that sort of thing. Preferably never, but he was going to outlive, well...all of us, outside of Princess Celestia. Best to actually sit him down and talk to him about the inevitability of death rather than have it come up one day out of nowhere.

The irritation and malice in her eyes was unmistakable as she moved over towards Fluttershy, that false smile of hers fading ever-so-slightly. I tensed at the sight, those teeth of hers only on partial display, but I could see them well enough to make out the predator-like sharpness to them. Those weren't an herbivore's chompers.

"Does my crown no longer count now that I've been imprisoned for a thousand years?"

She turned her attention to Rarity next on her other side, that starry ethereal mane of hers curling like an extra limb under Rarity's chin, flowing in gentle undulations, not unlike a leaf fluttering in a light breeze.

"Did you not recall the legend?" she asked, flicking Rarity's chin up with her mane. "Did you not see the signs?!"

I wanted to confront her. I wanted to rush in and start getting ponies to panic so they'd get out of the meeting hall. I didn't have the resources or the time to coordinate them all, so a panic would be the only quick way to do it. But first, I needed to make sure Spike was safe.

He was cowering against me. Nightmare Moon terrified him, and understandably so. He was only four years old, and she was already menacing enough to me. I could only imagine how much she was freaking him out right now.

By now, AJ had gotten Rainbow to keep her hooves on the ground for now, though Rainbow looked just as ready to get up close and personal as I was. Perhaps I had been a killer, murderer, twisted torturer and many other things over the course of my life. Some of them, I can still claim the title of...but then, I am also Lady Sparkle of House Sparkle. I am still Celestia's protege. I had a duty to use my cunning, my knowledge and my magic to protect those around me. That started with getting everyone in this hall out of here before things got a bit too heated.

I shifted over side-to-side with AJ and looked back at Spike, quickly urging him over onto her back with my magic. He resisted at first, but the look on my face brooked no argument, or at least I think so. He could've just as easily been too scared out of his wits to protest. Applejack gave me a confused look, her eyebrow quirking up at me as I leaned over towards her.

"I need you and Rainbow to start ushering ponies out of here, and I need you to take Spike back to the library. Can you do that for me?" I asked as quietly as I could.

Unfortunately, like trying to lean over in your seat to whisper the answers to a friend during class, Nightmare Moon's attention snapped over to us the moment I was halfway done speaking.

"You dare to show such blatant disrespect before your new Queen?!" she called down at us, her wings spreading out menacingly at her sides.

I quickly gave Applejack a few firm pats on her chest with a hoof, and she took the hint. She backed off into the crowd around us, but Rainbow didn't seem to catch on. Not at first, anyways. I think she got it when AJ bit onto her tail again and gave it a rough tug, pulling her into the crowd as well, to the tune of a lot of protest from the rainbow-maned mare.

"No! Not at all, your majesty. At least, disrespect wasn't my intent," I quickly said, stepping forward with a small smile. "I was simply informing my companions that I'm well aware of who you are."

"Oh? The same companions that are retreating with the baby dragon you had on your back?" she asked, laughing at the brief instant of surprise in my expression. "A bit difficult not to stand out with something as rare as a dragon using you as a seat, and a fashionable suit on your body among a plethora of naked ponies. I saw you the moment you arrived."

She circled around me while the crowd behind me backed off, looking me over while I stood there as calmly as I could. Oh, what I wouldn't do to be able to finish my cigar off right now. Just something to calm my nerves. Sadly, no such luck.

"But, that matters little," she muttered, standing in front of me and leaning in a bit closer, those razor-sharp teeth showing through a small grin. "Who, pray tell, am I, little pony?"

I met her gaze stoically. "You're the Mare in the Moon, Nightmare Moon."

"Hah, such enthusiasm! I would dare to say that you're nonplussed," she said, looking me over a bit more closely, causing me to step back to put some distance between us. "I assume you know why I'm here then."

"Oh, you mean dooming us all to a slow, freezing, starving death by banishing the sun and ruling us through your eternal night? Yes, I'm very aware."

"Yet, even in my presence, you guard your fear well. But it's there..." she said, lifting a forehoof and tapping it against my chest. "Right there, deep in your heart."

"I'm a living creature that would prefer not to stop living for any reason," I said, smirking a little and staring up at her. "I think fear is natural."

She stared into my eyes for a moment longer, then laughed right in my face, her tail swatting the side of my head as she spun around to walk away from me. I almost didn't feel it, given how soft her 'fur' seemed to be. I could hear someone easing the meeting hall doors open behind the crowd, and I thanked my lucky stars that this was working. At least, I thought it was.

"As it should be!" she said, for all to hear, her voice seeming to reverberate through the hall. "I grow strong from your fear! It causes the sweetest nightmares for me to enjoy. So utterly delectable, you ponies are."

I risked a gaze up to where Rarity and Fluttershy were, but I didn't see them. Hopefully they already left out the back entrance, if one even existed. Maybe a window? Not the most dignified route of escape, but certainly acceptable given the circumstances. I glanced back at the crowd and noticed it was thinning closer to the door, not quite noticeable yet, but at least some progress was being made.

Wait...where were my guards?

"Seize her!" I heard Mayor Mare call out, pointing a hoof at Nightmare Moon. "Only she knows where the Princess is!"

My heart dropped out of my chest when I saw both of my guards lunge for her. It was the stupidest possible thing they could've done, but with Mayor Mare suddenly calling for action, well...they were trained to not let a civilian, even one in a high position, remain the focus of an enemy.

Nightmare Moon didn't seem to like that one bit. She turned to her left to face them both, her eyes glowing with a powerful light while her horn began to light up with raw mana. I could feel it from where I was standing, and for an instant, I feared she had prepared a seventh-tier spell just to make an example of them.

"Stand back, you foals!"

The lightning that arced from her horn was nigh-instantaneous, but I could tell it wasn't a more lethal spell like it could've been. She casted it far too fast for it to be particularly life-threatening, but when it hit them, their armor sparked and fizzled and the juttered in place before crumpling to the floor, letting out weak groans of pain as the electricity continued to cause small spasms throughout their bodies.

Panic erupted in that moment. First a few screamed, then moments after the entire meeting hall was screaming, ponies galloping around trying to get out the door. It was shoved wide open and they all began to filter out, that old herding instinct kicking in. They'd probably be running through the town for a while before they all realized the danger had passed, or had been left behind.

I lit my horn and grabbed the two guards while Nightmare Moon was briefly disoriented by the sudden surge of her attack. Alicorn or not, using a third-tier offensive spell like that without properly constructing an array can cause quite the backlash, and the fact that she was still standing steady and able to see straight was a testament to just how experienced she really was. Regardless, it still gave me an opportunity to get my guards to safety behind me.

She turned to face me, the malice in her eyes and the razor-sharp glint of her teeth becoming all the more apparent to me as she stalked towards me, her head held at a low forty-five degree angle, a standard for magical combat. Horn forward, eyes on your target, and all that.

"You would dare to defend those that stand against your new Queen?!" she growled, the screaming panic beginning to die down as less and less ponies lingered in the meeting hall.

I had already begun to weave an array in my mind when I heard hooves galloping in behind me. I risked a look back out of the corner of my eye and saw Applejack running in behind me, hefting the two guards onto her back. There was some visible strain on her from their combined weight, but she was definitely tougher and stronger than she looked.

"Mom?!"

I froze in utter terror at that voice. Forgetting my situation, I snapped my head around to lock my gaze on the little dragon standing fearfully at the meeting hall doors. He had a hand on one of the big doors for support, and he just stared at me with tearful, shimmering eyes. Looking back on it...I'm proud of him for having the guts to stand in the face of fear and spit on it just because he's worried about his Mother.

"So, ponies are taking to adopting baby dragons now? Hmph, and here I thought he was merely a familiar," Nightmare Moon said, seeming to care little about Applejack rushing out with the guards on her back. "Of course, that just makes you all the more interesting, little unicorn."

I quickly turned my attention back to Nightmare, crouching low and lighting up my horn as she drew closer to me.

"Applejack, get him away from here!!" I shouted, digging my hooves in and preparing for a scuffle I probably wouldn't be able to win.

Of course, that didn't mean the idea didn't excite me. I love a good scrap!

"What might your name be, little suit-wearing pony? One who would not flee at the very sight of nightmares given flesh?" Nightmare asked me, that unwavering, judging gaze of hers shining down on me.

I straightened up a little and let the magic die down in my horn. I honestly expected an attack from her right that moment, but she seemed...confident. A little too confident, if you ask me. I knew she was an alicorn, but c'mon, I had a chance! A slim chance!

"Twilight Sparkle," I said, clearing my throat. "Lady of House Sparkle, and Princess Celestia's personal student."

There was a sudden recognition in her eyes, followed by an almost snake-like delight, the way she smiled at me.

"Ah, so that is why you are vaguely familiar!" she gushed. "Many dreams have been filled with your visage, quite a few of them on the more risque side. Such power in you, other unicorns can't help but find you attractive."

"Oh, I'm aware," I said, waving it off. "Sometimes I even entertain their desires."

"How very noble of you." she muttered flatly.

I shrugged a little. "Mares have needs."

"How very non-noble of you," she said with a small laugh. "Not that I fault you for it."

"Speaking of dreams," I said, pulling my cigar case out of my pocket and looking it over briefly. "How did you view them from your prison? I would've assumed Celestia made sure you had no way of touching your subjects."

"Hah! She could seal me away, but the realm of sleep is my domain. She could not stop me no matter how hard she tried."

It made sense, all things considered. Even if someone were lucid enough to identify her in their dreams, they'd just chalk it up to old mare's tales and Nightmare Night shenanigans. It'd take a real stretch of the imagination to think that your dream version of Nightmare Moon was the Nightmare Moon.

"A small curiosity for myself," Nightmare suddenly said, sitting down and giving me a once-over. "Why were you not bothered by the thought of others dreaming about you in an erotic fashion? Most would be appalled."

I hah'ed and turned my side to her, striking a more sensual pose, my back arched slightly and a foreleg lifted off the ground, displaying my more feminine features to her.

"I'm in the spotlight a lot, your majesty. Why wouldn't somepony have fantasies about all this?" I asked, a cocky grin spreading across my muzzle.

She was enjoying herself, far as I could tell. Good. I needed to keep her talking. Keep her occupied, keep her distracted from everyone else. I had to get as much information out of her as I could. She asked about my cigars, my crippled leg, various other things. In doing so, I learned that she'd banished Celestia to the sun, and she knew little about modern society aside from the more modern methods of speech.

"You are most entertaining, Lady Sparkle! Enough that I won't kill you for your earlier transgression. On the contrary," she said, standing up once more and walking away from me. "If you swear fealty to me, I will make sure your life is a comfortable one."

"My life is comfortable enough," I responded, standing up and tucking my cigar case away once more. "Deepest apologies your majesty, but I cannot pledge myself to your rule. You intend to kill everyone with your eternal night, and you're inadvertently threatening my son's life by doing so. Ponies don't tend to get away with that, when I catch wind of it."

"Ah. A shame, verily," she muttered, turning to face me once more. "But I believe you will change your mind, given enough time. If not for yourself, then for your son's sake."

"And now you're threatening my son directly. I think I'm done talking to you, because now I really want to bounce your head off the floor."

"Resorting to violence now?" she asked, a small smirk adorning the corner of her mouth. "I would not expect it from a pony of your intellect and worldly experience."

"Violence is its own language, I've realized. So come on," I said, pushing myself up onto my hindlegs and shifting my stance, my forelegs raising up to protect myself. "Let's have a nice, bloody conversation."

"Ah-hah! As tempting as it may be to teach you your place, I would break you in seconds." she said, the bemusement in her tone only managing to irk me.

She wasn't wrong. If she was anything like her sister, she had the benefits of all three pony races in her. Unicorns aren't allowed to spar with earth ponies in the Royal Guard for a very good reason: earth ponies would snap us in half. Her? I think she'd liquefy my bones if she got a good hit in on me.

"However, if you are so intent on resorting to violence..."

Her fur and mane blackened rapidly before my eyes, before dissipating and dissolving into the air. She rapidly turned into a black smoke, her eyes the final thing visible on her body before they closed and she became a large starry black mass of ethereal gas. It churned and spread through the meeting hall, forming a large circle around me and obscuring the windows and the door from my sight.

Out of the wispy shadows it formed, I saw a pony step out into the artificial lighting overhead. The bright pure white of its eyes contrasted with the sheer black fur covering the pony's body, the batlike wings resting at its sides flaring as it stepped towards me. It could only be one thing, and three more were quick to join it.

Arcane constructs. Dangerous opponents in the right hooves...and sadly, Nightmare's hooves proved quite capable of pulling their strings like a master.

They are fairly stupid constructs that only get stupider the more you make, since you have to split your concentration between them to give them steady orders and even directly control their movements. However, you are only one pony, and one mind. We are not built to control more than one body at a time, though training yourself to multitask can really help to make them more effective. Instead, those you aren't directly controlling have to be given basic instructions that the artificial mind they're built with can follow to the best of its ability.

What's more deceptive about them is how alive they look. Make no mistake, there is no soul, no consciousness residing within them, and their bodies are nothing more than magic given physical form with a fairly complicated array. Though, looking more closely at their movements, the array Nightmare was using was likely primitive...perhaps she hadn't learned any more modern tricks?

"I will indulge your desire. Now, entertain me!"

I hopped in place a few times to test my bad hindleg while they rushed me, the four constructs spreading out away from each other to circle around me. Once I was sure my hindleg wouldn't immediately give out on me, I lunged at one of them as soon as it got close enough.

They weren't fighting on their hindlegs, like me. It wasn't uncommon for ponies to fight like I do, but my more unique mixing of styles is far from normal, melding the compact, focused skills of minotaur boxing with the Neighpon style of judo.

Ponies and zebras can manipulate things in the same way minotaurs and griffons do with their hands and claws, we just need to be able to touch that thing with our hooves. Known as tactile kinesis, we can manipulate anything we can touch with our hooves via magic that spreads over the object, invisible to the naked eye. It functions similar to how unicorns can reach out with their horns to grasp things from a distance, except, well...yeah, there's a reason it's called tactile kinesis.

The downside is that that ethereal grip is nowhere near as reliable as a flesh-and-blood hand, though it has the advantage of being able to shape itself however you desire. Muscle, sinew and bone have limits that can be built upon and can be reliably counted upon, and a pony's grip with their hooves pales in comparison to a minotaur grappling something. It's weak when compared to other races in other words. Still, we can hold guns like minotaurs do and use quills, pens and other things without absolutely relying on our mouths, so...net gain overall for ponykind, I guess.

However, most ponies dismiss it as unreliable and still use their mouths, something the educational system still hasn't addressed, much to my disappointment. I learned to train it to be stronger, and more useful to me, since I couldn't count on one of my hindlegs for the usual guard tactics of bucking and kicking. I needed something that would focus on the use of my forelegs for offense and my hindlegs for mobility and leverage. Boxing and judo both stood out to me.

Sure, I could've just carried a spear around with me everywhere, but that's not exactly acceptable, is it?

So when I suddenly wound up in front of the construct charging me, then weaved to the side and hooked my right hoof under its chin and pulled it backwards mid-charge, I think both Nightmare and the construct were taken by surprise. It was forced to rear up, and I pulled further back, stepping around behind it and getting both of my forelegs around its neck.

The other constructs halted and watched, their plan to flank me instantly shattered as I curved one foreleg under its neck and twisted hard to the left. A resounding crackling snap issued forth, a sound akin to hearing an electrical socket blow out several times over. I pushed the construct away and watched it collapse to the floor. The body juttered and began to burst into black flames, then dissipate into arcane smoke, wisping into the air and disappearing.

That was the downside to using arcane constructs as combat units: they're really easy to take out. Their bones make up the network of magic sustaining their form, and if you break just one, no matter where it is, it'll cause a cascade failure of the entire construct's body due to the flow of magic being disrupted irreversibly. Sometimes they even explode, if they're designed to. Kinda like a final fuck-you to whoever 'killed' them.

"A unicorn who opts to dive into melee combat rather than keeping her distance? How interesting you are, little protege of the sun!"

Oh, right. She was still watching me. It wasn't that I'd forgotten, I just...well, okay, maybe I did forget for a brief instant. I wasn't kidding when I said I was a killer, and the familiar motion of getting behind someone and just hurting them, well, I sometimes get lost in it unexpectedly. These arcane constructs weren't nearly as satisfying to take out as a living, breathing pony, but they'd do for a warm-up.

Two of them came at me from two different angles, and I quickly turned my focus to the one on my left. None of them seemed capable of fighting on their hindlegs like I was, so as it tried to run straight into me, I shifted to the left and threw a straight directly at its face. I heard the satisfying crunch-pop of its snout and its fake teeth getting knocked out of alignment, and it wobbled dazedly past me, legs still trying to run.

It fell flat on its face just as the other one sped up and tackled me from the side, knocking the wind out of me and taking me to the floor. I barely had time to twist myself onto my back and guard my face as the construct rose up and stomped its hooves down, one coming down on my chest and making me wheeze out the small breath I'd managed to take while the other was blocked from crushing my throat.

I quickly grabbed hold of the leg I'd blocked and twisted it to one side, forcing the construct off-balance and pulling that twisted foreleg down to my right. I kicked out with my left hindleg and rolled as the construct fell over to one side, shuffling to straddle it and pin it down. It fought back though, its forehooves sloppily flailing and pushing at me to try and get me off of it. I hammered a forehoof down directly over its face, smashing the back of its head against the floor in response.

The sudden weight on my back forced me forward, mashing my face into the wooden floor. That last construct had tackled me from behind, and was now mounted on my back, forelegs wrapped around my neck and choking me from behind. I pushed myself up onto all fours and tried to shake it off, but it wouldn't let go. The other one slowly got to its hooves as well, shaking off the punch to the face rather quickly. Fortunately, the one whose muzzle I'd broken seemed to dissipate into smoke, just like the first.

Getting on our back is one of our biggest weaknesses. It's one of the key disadvantages ponies have that led to us developing our military with a direct focus on always doing things in pairs at the very least. Once someone's back there, the only way to get them off is to buck them off or use magic, and bucking wasn't exactly the greatest option for me, with a weaker hindleg.

I lit up my horn, and the construct immediately tilted his head and bit down on it like it was some kind of lollipop. Pain lanced through my mind, but I fought through it, even as the other construct came over and bucked me in my chest, trying to bring me to the ground. My hooves faltered, but I quickly backed away from it and focused on my magic instead.

That's the upside to using constructs: they're disposable, and they lack any sense of self-preservation. The simplest and most effective strategy with them is to make them over and over and throw them at your opponent in hopes of overwhelming them with sheer numbers. Judging by how things were going for me right now, it was still tried-and-true.

The magic in my horn charged stronger and stronger, my magic arcing against the inside of the constructs mouth, singing its tongue and teeth before bursting outward in its muzzle and shattering its jaw and skull. Before it could dissipate, I reached up and grabbed hold of one of its forelegs with my hooves, hefting it off of myself and flipping it forward with a firm twist of my body, smacking the flank of the one remaining construct with its deteriorating body.

That didn't stop the construct from landing a kick right on the side of my face though. I reeled backwards from the unexpected impact and held a hoof to my face, the taste of copper coating my palate. By the time my vision straightened out, it was facing me again, charging at me in another kamikaze move. I did say these things were stupid.

It tried to tackle me again, but I was ready for it. I pushed forward when it tried to grab me, grappling with its forelegs and pushing it back, raising up onto my hindlegs again in the process. I lashed out with my forelegs, landing one hook, then another square on its jaw, the construct's head snapping to and fro as I unloaded on it. It fell to the ground, dazed and half-conscious. I sat down in front of it and grabbed its head, and smashed its face into the floor over and over until the crackling noises faded and it dissipated into smoke in my hooves.

Nightmare's laughter reverberated around me, and I got to my hooves, looking around for more danger. Fortunately, nothing else was coming my way. I deliberately opted not to use my magic for fear of giving something away to her, but if she sent even more after me I might not have any choice but to use my horn for more offensive applications.

"You are a vicious pony, Lady Sparkle! You could have broken its leg, but you opted to brutally bash its skull in," I heard her say, a light chuckling accompanying her almost wispy voice. "Not to mention fighting four of them off with minimal use of your horn. Where did you learn to fight like that?"

"A little mix of self-study, training, and a lifetime of learning in the Hard Knock Academy, as a friend of mine likes to put it." I said casually, spitting out some of the blood in my mouth.

"I see...well, in any case, it was very amusing to watch. Sadly, I no longer have the time to spend with you," she said, the smoke in the room coalescing near the door. "My offer still stands."

"My refusal still stands."

"As you wish. You will change your mind."

I watched the billowing starry smoke flow out of the doors and into the night sky, staying where I was for a moment to take in the fact that I'd just survived challenging an alicorn to a fight. Nightmare hadn't attacked me directly, but...still. I pulled my cigar case out of my pocket and held it in a shaky hoof, flicking it open and floating my almost-finished cigar to my lips, lighting it up with my magic and taking a deep drag of it, slowly exhaling the smoke through my nostrils.

I needed to calm my nerves after that.

Author's Notes:

Huzzah! You all can blame Xenoblade Chronicles 3D for how long this took. That and the overall length of the chapter itself. Seriously, that game's like crack. I can't stop! There's way too much to do. ._.;

Edit: It has come to my attention that I should perhaps post the music I listen to when I write these chapters here as well as on my blog. If you want to know why I post music, my blog post explains it!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pmo1VW_wA_o