As with the days leading up to Nightmare Night, the castle was abuzz with activity as decorators worked to decorate surfaces with ornamentation specific to the Hearth’s Warming holiday. Wreaths and ribbons hung from the ceiling and walls, decorated trees seemed to mark every corner and intersection of the halls, some of the servants had traded out their usual uniforms for those tinted with holiday colors, and the gently falling snow outside completed the festive atmosphere.

Thomas let out a contented sigh as he sat back in Moonlight’s lap while Silver cozied up to the mare’s other side. The unicorn removed her armor for mutual comfort, leaving the three of them in only their concubine uniforms before the fireplace. “This is nice,” Thomas said tiredly as he snuggled against his mare.

Moonlight adjusted her position against the bed as she stared into the crackling flames. “Sitting by the hearth, surrounded by loved ones,” she murmured in a low volume voice before issuing a sigh of contentment of her own. “This is what Hearth’s Warming is all about.”

“Still can’t get over the ‘new’ fireplace,” Thomas indicated with a chuckle. It was a feature of the castle that most of the rooms containing fireplaces employed a magical spell which made them vanish from the room, popping in only as needed so as not to waste space during the warmer times. It was an architectural design from back in the days before more advanced heating lamps, but Celestia had kept it unchanged for its homely feeling, especially this time of year. “Magic is awesome.”

“Celestia keeps her office’s hearth active year round, for ‘convenience,’” Silver said with air quotes.

“What do you mean?” Moonlight asked.

“According to Sun Dancer, it’s for those times when she’s just too lazy to ignite her messages to her protégé with her own magic, so she just tosses them in the flame,” the bat explained as she made a tossing gesture.
Moonlight tilted her head as she snaked an arm over the other mare’s belly, pulling her close. “Couldn’t she just use a candle or something?”

“I asked the same thing,” Silver laughed tiredly. “She said she burned her fingers trying that once and has been hesitant ever since.” Her explanation was met with a round of soft chuckles from the others before they fell back into silence.

“So,” Thomas began. “Isn’t this around the time when most people do their Christmas shopping?”

“Christmas?” Silver asked. “I recall you mentioning that was something similar to Hearth’s Warming.”

“Thematically it’s basically identical,” Thomas explained. “Whole different origins and history, but the look and feel of it pretty much the same.”

“I remember,” Moonlight hummed. “But you’re right. Now is about the time most ponies are migrating to the stores. Were you thinking of joining them?”

“Be nice to have something,” Thomas retorted. “How does that work with the harem exactly? Do we draw lots, get something for everyone in the harem, or what?”

“Good question,” Silver said as she sat up. “We should really ask.”

The trio met up with Talon who filled them in. It was important for the harem’s alicorn to get something from the harem, either by the concubines pooling their money or each getting their own thing. Said alicorn would then give the concubines something, which would usually be followed up with an orgy. At least, that’s how it typically worked in Celestia’s harem. Other than that, the harem was free to do whatever they liked regarding each other. Talon then suggested they go out for a night on the town, leaving Silver to hold down the fort. The night air had a heavy chill with the recent snows, so Thomas threw on a warmer set of clothes, Moonlight donned her armor, and they headed off into Canterlot.

“Come on, chimp,” Talon called from ahead as she pulled the hapless human by the arm down the street. Despite the tiring ordeal of satisfying an agitated alicorn in so many experimental positions, the griffon was bursting with an energy that left her companions a bit envious. “The night’s still young and this griffon wants to get her Hearth’s Warming shop on.”

“Do we really need to rush, though?” Thomas asked as he struggled to keep pace with the griffon. “I don’t think the stores are going anywhere.”

“The sooner we get where we’re going, the sooner we can get back and rest.” Talon offered no further explanation as she set her sights on their next destination.

Moonlight, who had been keeping a steady pace beside Thomas, rolled her eyes at the griffon’s antics. However, that did not stop her from keeping her eyes on the surrounding pedestrians. Most paid their odd group no more than a quick, unconcerned glance. However, more than once she caught wind of words like ‘thing’ and ‘animal’ directed towards her group. Just as often she caught other ponies staring, some with surprise and curiosity, others with admiring smiles, and a few mentions of ‘Halloween’. Thankfully she managed to ward them all off with her best intimidating-guard look before her friends took notice of the city’s trash making itself known. They backed down and all went their merry way. If somepony starts something, I’m not sure I’ll be able to stop Tali before she knocks some heads around, she thought in amusement.

The trio proceeded to explore the streets of Canterlot with the enthusiasm and thoroughness of an archeologist who had just discovered some long lost temple, or something deep like that. Thomas was being run too ragged to come up with anything better. Unlike their previous outings, though, the griffon seemed to be actively working to make sure the human was in her sights at all times, not unlike how Moonlight usually did. This was in addition to her more frequent displays of physical affection.

“Not that I necessarily mind, but did my personal bubble pop without my knowing?” Thomas asked as Talon came up from behind and draped her arms over him, nuzzling into the back of his neck.

“You’d better not mind. I’m doing this for you, ya know.”

“Really? For a moment I thought you were molesting me to make Moonlight happy.”

“Why must you insist on bringing me into this?” The unicorn asked as she kept pace with them.

“Quit acting like you don’t love it, smarty-corn,” Talon teased as she pulled Thomas close against her bare chest and planted a quick peck on his cheek.

With Talon still draped over his back, he awkwardly led the way down the sidewalk as passersby gave them quizzical looks, but most of those looks quickly averted when they saw Moonlight. The streets were lovely tonight, but the human couldn’t help but feel that Luna might not have given it her all with how few stars there were behind the winter clouds. It was disappointing, but he understood that even someone as amazing as Luna would need to take breaks in order to recharge her batteries.

“Besides, the little guy’s still got an aversion to public displays of affection,” Talon explained, gesturing to a nearby stallion who was trying not to smile. All the while she was making herself into just enough of a nuisance so that Thomas had trouble walking, but wasn’t entirely encumbered. Truly it was an art. “Steel Hoof says this was something he had to learn after leaving the Minotaur Kingdom. His people tend to be more solitary, so he had to adjust to how ‘touchy-feely’ pony society was.”

“You have to deal with that when you moved here?” Thomas asked, ignoring the stares his lion-skin cape was earning.

“Not really. Griffons are pretty physical too, but we’re not as gentle.” She leaned forward until her beak was level with Thomas’ ear. “I think you’d have hated it back in the Griffon Kingdom.”

Thomas couldn’t quite place Talon’s tone, but something about it bothered him. It sounded a bit hurt, but not quite convincingly so. Then he realized what she was saying. “Would I weigh as much over there as I do right now?” He jumped a bit, jostling the griffon around him for emphasis.

“Probably more,” Talon smirked. “I’m actually pretty petite as far as griffons go. Most of our females would just fall on you and let you squirm beneath their bodies.”

“So basically not that different from my life right now?” Thomas smirked.

“Maybe a bit more biting,” Talon said, nibbling at his ear playfully.

“So where exactly are we going again?” Moonlight asked in annoyance. “We’re still on the rich side of the shopping district and I don’t think I see anything that either of you would like.” She leered at the griffon still making a pest of herself. “It would be a lot easier if you’d just tell us what you were looking for.”

“Hmm. She may have a point.” Thomas admitted, causing Moonlight to beam proudly. “You think if I worked my lower body muscles enough, I could swing Tali around and use her feet like whips? Maybe we can clear the way faster?”

“A more noble aspiration I have never encountered,” Talon awed at Thomas’ suggestion before they both descended into chuckles, while Moonlight rolled her eyes at the distraction. “Nice to see you coming along so well, chimp. I’m proud of ya.”

“As am I,” Moonlight nodded. Silliness aside, she really was happy for him. “You’ve become much more outgoing these last few weeks. I’m almost tempted to say that soon you might be able to go outside on your own.”

Thomas raised an eyebrow. “Only almost?”

“It would be a fool mare to present an argument against her own job. Especially one she enjoyed so much,” she giggled.

It was true, though, as the human considered it. Compared to how he had been, Thomas had really come out of his shell. It may have only been because he had learned to draw strength from those around him, but wasn’t that what friends were supposed to do? In a way Talon was like the big sister he’d never had, or more accurately the big sister he’d read about in hentai manga, looking out for him but never missing a chance to embarrass him with her sexuality. Moonlight, on the other hand, was like his rock, someone he could always rely upon to make things better. And Luna… she was his lead mare in every sense of the word. She’d been there since the beginning, helping him to open up in ways he’d never imagined he could; and the walking talking argument against his original resignation to die alone, but that stuff didn’t matter anymore. It was a bit trickier to place his exact feelings on Silver, but suffice to say her company was treasured. He cared for them all and it warmed his heart to know they cared for him right back. The sex wasn’t bad either.

“How about some jewelry?” Thomas suggested, pointing out a store called Ornate’s Ornates. “Girls like jewelry, right?”

“No harm in looking, I guess.” Talon’s tone betrayed her uncertainty. “If they have something real nice, maybe, but ‘Leste was never much for shiny rocks.”

“Fair enough,” Moonlight remarked. “So what is she for?”

Talon shot the mare a half smirk. “Still not certain what to get yours, huh? Well, don’t get too worked up about it. ‘Leste always likes it when we make stuff. Ya know how students might like a teacher a lot so they make a banner to show their appreciation?”

Not in my reality, but go on, Thomas thought as he nodded.

“She goes absolutely gaga for that kind of stuff. It appeals to her inner teacher to see her ‘pupils’ show how much they care,” Talon explained with a lascivious grin. “As for you guys, well, you know your alicorn best. What’s something you could make for her, besides getting a cooler modeled after the chimp?”

“Hardy har har,” Thomas retorted in annoyance. Though Talon’s words did leave him with something to work with. As he thought, he recalled that there was something Luna’s harem had already made together. “We could check on how well Twister’s doing, and see if it really will be ready for the holiday rush?”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Moonlight beamed. “We can go to the store in a little bit, but, since we’re here, I’d really like to see their jewelry selection first.”

Thomas smiled at the mare as the griffon got off him. “Sure thing.” They crossed the street as they headed in the direction of the jewelry store.

However, the group was stopped from entering by one of the greeters, a white unicorn with a spiffy dress shirt and nothing else, held out his hand to stop them. “Begging your pardon, ma’am,” he said to Talon in a posh nasally tone. “But I’m afraid that our fine establishment does not allow pets inside.”

“Pet?” Talon asked with a cocked eyebrow. “You seriously just call him a pet?”

“Animal companion, if you prefer, ma’am,” the greeter replied. “But fear not. I shall wait out here and hold his… where’s his leash?” he asked with a growing panic.

“What?” Thomas asked with a mix of amusement and offense. “You afraid I’m gonna jump you or something?”

The greeter flinched back. “It… talks?”

“Afraid not,” Thomas shook his head. “The stress is getting to you and you’ve finally cracked.”

Talon held out her claw and Thomas dutifully gave her a high-five. “Nice one,” she whispered.

“Good sir,” Moonlight cut in. “I’ll have you know you have the distinct privilege of meeting Princess Luna’s Senior Concubine, Sir Thomas,” she said with an attitude of formal seriousness. “It would behoove you well to pay him the courtesy his position is owed.”

Blinking rapidly, the greeter eyes scanned the group until they landed on Talon’s loincloth. That seemed enough for him to make up his mind and welcome them in. “By all means, Mr. Senior Concubine, please allow me to apologize for my terrible impropriety. These old eyes, you know,” he laughed nervously. “Perhaps I might interest you in our special discount for the Crowns and those employed in their service?”

“A discount?” Talon asked in faux offense. “You aren’t trying to bribe us into forgetting the insult you’ve inflicted, are you?”

“Would that work?” The greeter responded obsequiously.

Talon folded her arms over her chest and gave her smuggest smile. “Depends on how much you’re offering.”

The stallion rolled his eyes, mentally chastising himself for digging himself into this hole. “Our fine establishment offers a number of tantalizing discounts for its valued customers. Those in most direct service to the Princesses, castle staff and the like, are offered quite the deal on their purchases. Of course,” he indicated Moonlight, “Ornates’ Ornates offers an additional deal to those willing to lay down their lives for the crown. For concubines, however…” he trailed off. “I think I’ll have to talk to my manager, but I think she’d agree that such a prestigious position deserves a very special discount all its own.”

The groveling is strong with this one, Thomas thought.

Talon bobbed her head from side to side, thinking it over. “Weeeeell, maybe. We’ll see.”

“Thank you, my lady.” The greeter bowed and rushed off into the store.

“I’m all for discounts,” Thomas said, “but doesn’t this feel a little like extortion to you?”

Talon looked down at the human with a cocked eyebrow. “And your point is…?”

“Nothing, apparently,” Thomas chuckled quietly. “Just hoping that this abuse of power isn’t the beginning of a slippery slope into full jerkdom.”

“If that’s your concern, then you’re probably safe,” Moonlight replied.

Soon enough the greeter returned and affirmed that the store owner agreed to the deal.

Upon entering Ornate’s Ornates, Moonlight immediately stepped out in front of the group to survey the store. Conversations petered out as the customers watched her suspiciously, as a guard in a place like this was not something they were used to seeing. Many ears perked in anticipation, obviously expecting the Princesses or someone else of great import, but to their eyes, the only ones to enter were a griffon and a foal they didn’t recognize, so all returned to their previous business.

Ornate’s Ornates was a store befitting the expensive tastes of rich ponies. It was set up like most jewelry stores Thomas had seen. Glass counters were set up around the outskirts and two more displays stood out in the middle of the marble floor. The walls were painted a muted yellow with magical lamps set up at regular intervals along the wall. Thomas was grateful that they’d elected to enter at night, lest they be blinded when the rays of the sun reflected off the various jewels and metals. The numerous items on display could very well be mistaken for priceless artifacts, if it weren’t for the price tags on equally prominent display.

A quick scan by the frugal human revealed the cheapest item to be a pair of emerald earrings for 400 bits. Thomas glowered at the earrings, condemning them for existing at such a price.

“Find something you like?” Talon asked teasingly as she pressed her breasts to his back while her claws gripped his shoulders. She looked to the earrings and then poked a claw at Thomas’ earlobe. “Hmm. Doesn’t look like you’re pierced.”

“And I’m gonna stay that way, thank you very much,” Thomas replied sternly. “It’s just, look at the price. That’s just ridiculous.”

“Meh,” Talon shrugged. “Personally, I’m starting to warm up to the idea of some collars, gem encrusted an all fancy looking.”

“You can’t be serious,” Thomas deadpanned.

“She looks serious to me,” Moonlight noted with a hint of dread.

“That’s ‘cause I am,” Talon beamed. “Ya know, I heard that unicorns used to put their stallions in collars so everyone’d know who they belonged to. Maybe a certain alicorn might appreciate the gesture?”

Damn bird, Thomas thought as he glared at the wren. Why you gotta go and make a good point like that?

“The custom was hardly that widespread,” said a mare behind the counter. She was a young pink unicorn with a dark yellow mane and tail. Her attire consisted of two bronze bracelets on both wrists and an orange unbuttoned blouse with her name tag on it, leaving the bracelets on her flanks bare for all to see. The tag read Bright Bracelet. “It was the ponies who settled southern Equestria who were the last to practice collaring as a serious custom. Although I hear it’s making a bit of a comeback in some circles.

“But I’m sure you’re not here for a history lesson,” Bright continued. “Was there anything you were interested in, besides collars?”

Talon beamed an evil grin and snatched Thomas up before he could run.

Some time later…

“Well aren’t you just the little charmer,” Bright Bracelet gushed as she finished setting Thomas with his new attire.

“She’s not wrong,” Talon commented while nodding her approval. “The green really does bring out your eyes.”

Thomas had been extracted from the warmer fabrics for the purpose of fitting the various accessories, leaving him only in his uniform as he was subjected to the griffon’s sudden urge to play dress up. He hadn’t stopped fiddling with the chain since it’d been set around his neck. The thing was unusually heavy, but had the most intriguing texture which felt odd against his fingertips. It was encrusted with complimenting rubies and emeralds, which gave it a pleasantly Christmas look. Further, Bright Bracelet had spent some time adjusting the silver arm bands on his wrists until she was satisfied they were perfectly symmetrical to match the gold shoulder covers.

“So?” Bright Bracelet asked eagerly as she held up a mirror in front of her perky pink breasts. “What do you think?”

Thomas couldn’t help but smile as he tried to keep his focus on the reflection and not the excited nipples to either side. I look like a freaking pimp! He mused. From prostitute to pimp. I guess that makes me a social climber. He thought as he turned his attention to the shoulder covers. “Not bad, but I don’t really get what these are for. Is there supposed to be a cape that goes with it or something?”

“The cape is an optional attachment, yes.” Bright Bracelet nodded. “I can go get a few samples if you’d like. What’s your favorite color?”

“No thanks,” Thomas held up his hand. “I feel silly enough as is.”

“Silly?” Bright Bracelet queried in surprise. “You look just like my uncle Brilliant Broche when he last attended the Gala.”

“Yeah, but don’t you think it’s all a bit… gaudy?” Thomas asked gently, hoping to put an end to this as quickly as possible.

“Hmm,” Bright Bracelet puzzled as she set the mirror aside and eyed him over. “It’s symmetrical, but now that I look at it, it does seem a bit off balance. Perhaps you’re too top heavy.”

“I feel top heavy,” Thomas agreed as he rolled the ache out of his shoulders.

Talon set her claw on his shoulder and nodded sympathetically. “Such is the burden of all fair maidens. Trust me. You’ll get used to it.”

“You’re one to talk,” Thomas mumbled as he removed the chain and shoulder covers. “I’m not a pony, and all this stuff is just way too heavy for me. If I walk around for an hour like this I’ll either get a workout or a lifetime of back problems. Besides, this is all way too flashy for me.”

“I see,” Bright Bracelet nodded. “Hmm. Perhaps if we spread them out more and find something more subtle,” she mumbled as she searched through the glass cases.

“What about this?” Moonlight offered. The others gathered around to find her pointing at a gold ring. “My father has one of those he likes to wear for special occasions.”

“Now there’s an idea.” Bright Bracelet said excitedly as she hurried around the counter to open it from the back and retrieved the ring, showing it to her potential customers. “And it fits perfectly with your, ahem, position.” She beamed.

“You got anything smaller?” Talon asked. “Cause I don’t think that’ll stay on.”

“Yeah.” Thomas agreed as he inspected the ring up close and held up his hand for comparison. “There’s no way that’ll fit on my finger.” This was met with subdued snickers from the surrounding females. “What?”

“Sorry. Sorry.” Moonlight was the first to compose herself. “It’s, well, it’s not for your finger.”

“Then… what’s it for?” Thomas asked warily as he saw Moonlight’s cheeks tint with pink.

“If you would please disrobe?” Bright Bracelet asked. “I’ll need to check your size.”

“Disrobe?” Thomas asked flatly. Checking and double checking, he confirmed he was indeed wearing nothing but the arm bands and his loincloth. We were just saying the ring was too big, but there’s no way that thing’s big enough to go around my wrists. So where’s it supposed… to… oh no.

“It’s a bangle that goes around your balls, silly.” Bright Bracelet explained like it was obvious. “It’s an ancient fertility symbol for stallions. The bangle says,” she deepened her voice in imitation of a male’s, “look at me and my shiny foal planter.” She giggled, returning to her regular voice. “Like I said, ancient, but it’s still holds appeal to this day. Though, if you don’t like the bangle, we also have a band for your penis. However, I wouldn’t recommend both. One is a sign of virility. Two just looks desperate.” She said in disapproval.

“My father said the same thing,” Moonlight agreed. “He preferred the bangle though.”

Thomas’ brain finally switched back on as he looked up at Moonlight in shock. “You watched your dad put a ring around his balls?”

“I don’t think I ever watched him put it on,” Moonlight shrugged casually, uncertain what was upsetting Thomas so. “He just put it on for special occasions, like fancy parties. Although,” she chuckled, “I do remember this one time my brother snuck into father’s drawer and tried it on.” She continued snickering. “He couldn’t figure out how to get it off before one of my moms caught him. He was in soooo much trouble.”

“Bangle or dick band, I still need to measure you and I can’t do it with that in the way.” Bright Bracelet said sternly, gesturing down to Thomas’ loincloth. “If you could just whip it out real quick, this won’t take a minute.”

“No thanks,” Thomas said flatly. “I think I’ll do without putting jewels on my junk.” Especially after that comment about not knowing how to get it off.

“Junk?” Bright Bracelet asked in offense. “I’ll have you know Ornate’s Ornates boasts the finest jewelry in all Canterlot.”

“No. Not the merchandise. I meant, ugh,” Thomas groaned. “It’s a euphemism for genitals, alright?” He admitted with an annoyed sigh. Cultural barriers are really annoying. “Point is, I don’t want metal on my crotch. Besides, we’re not even shopping for me.”

“Maybe you’re not,” Moonlight retorted flatly as she eyed the ring a moment longer. “I was told we were to be offered a considerable discount to make up for a certain… transgression, earlier. Would that still apply if I decided to leave and come back later?”

“Certainly, ma’am,” Bright Bracelet chirped as she retrieved a quill and paper with her magic. “I’ll just make a little note here,” she handed off the paper, “and you are free to return any time.” She glanced at Thomas before giving Moonlight a conspiratorial wink.

Ignoring Thomas’ confused stammering, the group pushed the human along to a new section of the display, the one with the collars.

“I figure it’s about time we got to these,” Bright Bracelet held out her hands in presentation. “We’ve got quite an array of colors, from the gem encrusted, to the plain, to even some with spikes if that’s what you want.”

“They’re all the same size,” Talon noted as she observed. “Do you have to get them fitted?”

“Not necessarily,” Bright Bracelet dismissed. “Some of our collars are enchanted to match whatever neck they’re placed on. However, the enchantment is… well it’s new.” She said in the tone of a pony who hoped what they said made sense. “The idea is that the collar fits the first pony it’s put on, and then holds that size indefinitely. However, if placed on another pony, the collar refits itself. You can do this a few times, but eventually the enchantment wears out and you have to get it recharged. The idea is that you can share a collar between multiple partners.”

“A neat trick,” Talon commented. “But for what I’m thinking, we’re gonna need several of these if we plan on going that route.”

“For the Princess?” Bright Bracelet whispered, glancing cautiously around the store.

“I’m afraid that’s on a need-to-know basis, ma’am,” Moonlight cut in not unkindly.

As the ponies and griffon conversed, Thomas had begun staring blankly at the collars as he thought. Luna, Moonlight, Talon, and Silver. He listed. Luna’s basically covered with Twister, but what about the others? He’d seen a number of things in this store that he’d imagined the ladies in his life would appreciate, and it wasn’t like he couldn’t afford them. The trick would be in making the purchase without letting the others know, especially his unicorn shadow.

“Hey. Do you guys have a catalogue for your merchandise?” He asked the salesmare.

“We do.” Bright Bracelet squatted down and retrieved a small pamphlet from behind the counter before offering it to Thomas. “Here ya go.”

Thomas opened the pamphlet and scanned for the particular feature he’d thought of. “You guys wouldn’t happen to do delivery, would you?”

“I don’t think so sir,” Bright Bracelet said apologetically. “I’ll have to go ask my manager.” The mare departed and returned soon after with a blue unicorn who wore a large frilly hat that could probably function as an umbrella

“I’m terribly sorry, sir.” She began. “My name is Ornate Crown, the owner of this fine establishment, and I’m afraid we offer no such service.”

“Shame,” Thomas frowned in disappointment. “Don’t suppose you know if any other stores do?”

“I doubt it,” Ornate said with a scoff. “Establishments such as mine wish to distance ourselves from the commonality of… fast-food chains,” she said the word as though it were a swear.

Thomas furrowed his brow as he continued to study the catalogue. “I guess I can understand why you’d want to distance yourselves like that, but you’re kind of missing the point.”

“And that would be?” Ornate asked with a dismissive scoff. It was apparent she was merely humoring him.

“Second rate food is only part of what fast-food places sell,” the human explained thoughtfully. “The other, bigger part, is convenience.”

Ornate scrunched her nose in bemusement. “How exactly does one sell an intangible concept such as convenience?”

Thoumas couldn’t help but grin. “In the same way you sell class,” he replied. “It’s like an invisible price tag added on to every purchase. For example: your store has an atmosphere of refinement and propriety to it, right?” he asked and Ornate beamed in approval. “Well, that the atmosphere of the store is part of what you’re selling, something customers want but might not be able to get anywhere else. They come here because the like the feel of this store, they’re buying the shopping experience as much as they are the merchandise. Does that make sense?”

Ornate’s face scrunched in thought as she considered. “I… I’m not sure.”

“Customers want a thing, so you give it to them. In fast-food it’s like ar der hmm,” Thomas attempted to say through the claw clasped over his lips.

“Never mind him,” Talon said as she pulled Thomas back. “He rambles sometimes. Anyway, I think we’ve seen enough for right now. My friends and I’ll come back for that little discount later, kay?”

“Um, okay?” Ornate responded as the griffon hurried her party out of the store.

“Chimp,” Talon whispered warningly into his ear. “You were blabbing again.”

“Talon?” Moonlight asked warily.

“Chimp here was about to give away human economic stuff, for FREE!” she emphasized. “Dumbass should be selling this stuff to universities or something, not blabbing to the first mildly attractive mare who asks.” She lifted her claw for him to answer.

“… Oops,” Thomas deadpanned.

“Damn right, oops.” She stepped back and gave him some space as he took his clothes back and dressed in the on the sidewalk. “I thought you introverts were supposed to spend all your time thinking.”

“I was,” Thomas chuckled. “I was thinking I could get something delivered so I could surprise you guys with presents. You can imagine how tricky that might be for someone like me.” His eyes trailed over to Moonlight.

“You really shouldn’t worry so much,” the mare assured. “I’ll like whatever you give me.”

Thomas fixed her with a deadpan stare. “When has that line ever worked on anyone ever?”

Talon’s beak moved as she silently counted to herself. “Three, maybe four times,” she said with reasonable certainty. “Out of the roughly hundred attempts I’ve seen.”

Thomas gestured at Talon while giving Moonlight a ‘see-what-I-mean’ look.

Moonlight rolled her eyes in exasperation. “Hearth’s Warming is about spending time with friends and loved ones.”

“And commemorating your ancestors’ victory over snow demons that literally wanted to freeze your kind to death,” Talon added in a tone resembling a lecture. She did not falter under Moonlight’s terse glare.

“Presents,” the mare continued, “are just a nice bonus.”

Thomas nodded like a bobble head. “Uh huh. Yeah. That’s easy for you to say, but I’m…” Thomas trailed off, unable to finish.

Moonlight zeroed in on Thomas’ expression and recognized it instantly. “Pardon the armor,” she said before scooping him up in a hug. “You’re being hard on yourself again, aren’t you?” It was more of an accusation than a question.

Seeing no point in resisting, Thomas surrendered to the mare’s comforting strength. “You guys do literally everything for me. Is it too much to ask to do a little something for you that isn’t sex related?”

Moonlight sighed. “If you’re that intent on it, I’ll see if I can arrange something.”

Thomas pushed the mare back to look up into her eyes. “Just like that?”

“Don’t get me wrong. You’re making a mountain out of a molehill here, but it’s clearly coming from a good place, so I’ll allow it.”

“So glad to get your permission,” Thomas snarked.

“As you should be,” Moonlight said authoritatively. “Now then, I suppose we should continue our shopping. See if we can find anything we like for a later purchase.”

God damn, has this chapter been a pain in my ass. The original premise dates all the way back to when the story started, back in the trio’s first outing. The idea was for someone to say something they shouldn’t have and work the nobility into a frenzy clamoring to Thomas for favors. That idea was scrapped for something that featured more on the Ornates as minor villains, building up their devious plan to trick Thomas into marrying one of their daughters, or something, and leading into a minor scuffle that Moonlight would be disciplined for for not handling better. But, as you might imagine, that plot didn’t work out so well either. That kind of conflict just doesn’t want to work in this story.

So I cobbled together what I could of my previous attempts, salving the least uncomfortable segments together for a simple shopping chapter. And it finally worked. I wish I could have given more of a conflict like I did with the ursa attack, but I guess we’ll all just have to wait a little longer for that one.