“You sure about this?” Moonlight Shield asked as she followed Thomas.

The human in question was walking as fast as he could in the direction he was fairly certain was opposite of Prince Blueblood’s quarters. “Hell yeah. Prince or not, there’s no way in Tartarus that I’d ever sleep with that prick.” Though angry, Thomas couldn’t help congratulating himself on how well he’d adjusted to Equestrian dialect. “Can we please talk about something else?”

“Like what?”

“Well… it’s been a while since I picked up a copy of the Equestria Daily. Anything happen in recent news?”

Moonlight thought a moment. “I heard this little town called Ponyville was nearly destroyed by an infestation of parasprites. That was a thing.”

“Really,” Thomas said in fake surprise while a smile touched his lips.

“Is something funny?”

“No, not really.” The truth was that this was one of the incidents he’d warned Celestia and Luna about. But based on his description, she seemed satisfied that the Element of Laughter would handle the situation and felt that her student needed to learn the lesson, though she had secretly sent in agents around the town’s outskirts just in case things got too out of control. “So what all happened?”

“There are these little bugs called parasprites that inhabit the Everfree Forest. All they do is eat and spit up copies of themselves. Normally the local predators keep their numbers in check, but one wandered into town and things got out of control really quickly. It seems Princess Celestia’s student tried a spell to stop them from eating all the food, because naturally the disaster would have to happen on the very day the Princess was due to visit the town, but the little buggers started literally eating the town instead. All seemed lost until the Element of Laughter slapped some instruments together and led them back to the Everfree in a parade. Oh, and it looks like we’re here.”

Thomas pushed open the doors to chow hall. Row after row of tables were lined up across the cafeteria with a line to the immediate right to the entrance. With his guard close behind, Thomas took his place in the short line and looked over what the chefs had to offer. A wide assortment of fruits and vegies was nice, but he needed some protein. “You wouldn’t happen to have any… meat, would you?” To Thomas’ relief, the chef didn’t grimace at the question and pointed further up the line. There he found the relatively tiny section devoted to the meat eaters of the castle staff. Thomas grabbed himself some sausage, eggs, and a few orange slices. Moonlight Shield got some hay bacon, a couple apples, and a bowl of oats.

The pair then set out to find some seats. The hall was relatively empty due to the fact that Luna’s night court was still being built and thus so much smaller than Celestia’s day court. Even though virtually everyone present was in Luna’s colors, be they guard, maid, or butler, Thomas still didn’t feel comfortable sitting with strangers. However, Thomas did catch a few ponies staring him, or rather his uniform. The stallions nodded in what was most likely a congratulatory “lucky bastard” sort of way, while the mares ate him up with their gaze, obviously curious what made him so appealing to the Princess. Thomas quickly reassured himself that what he did wasn’t anything to be embarrassed by, but he still quickly motioned towards one of the empty seats in the corner to escape the stares as quickly as possible. Moonlight followed silently. However, just as the pair were about to sit down, Thomas heard a thud and turned to see that Moonlight had been knocked to the floor. Before he could react, a pair of arms wrapped around his small frame and pulled him into a warm feathery embrace.

“Hey there, chimp,” a gravely yet feminine voice greeted as Thomas was squeezed tighter in the embrace, his face being buried into a pair of small, furry breasts.

“Talon?” Thomas asked as he struggled to look up. Sure enough, he was greeted by the friendly visage of Talon, Celestia’s griffon consort.

“What’d you just call me?” The griffon raised an eyebrow indignantly.

“Sorry, Tali,” Thomas smiled.

“That’s better. How’s it hanging, chimp.” Talon let Thomas’ feet touch the ground, but still held him in her claw-like hands as she smiled down at him. The griffon had crimson fur from her torso down, white feathers around her head had somehow pulled back into a pony tail (possibly to be ironic), yellow claws for hands, lion paws for feet instead of hooves, and dark red wings. Her relatively small breasts, which were just at eye level with Thomas, betrayed the fact that she most likely found the night air cold, or that she was happy to see him. Beneath her well-toned six-pack and above her child-bearing hips was a loincloth just like Thomas’, but emblazoned with Celestia’s sun instead of Luna’s moon.

“Unhand him you cur!” Moonlight Shield threatened as she stood in an aggressive stance with clenched fists and lit her horn in preparation for a spell.

“Ease up, guard pony,” Talon waved dismissively and pulled Thomas close to her side. “Me and chimp here go way back.”

“We’ve only known each other for like eight weeks,” Thomas pointed out.

Moonlight began to relax, but her horn remained lit.

“So? You’ve only been in Equestria a few months and somehow managed to worm your way into Princess Luna’s bed,” Talon teased. “It is not the quantity of time we spend together, but the quality. Besides, we carnivores have to stick together.”

“I’m not a carnivore and neither are you. I’ve seen you eat apples,” Thomas explained for what he felt must have been the twentieth time. Then he turned his attention back to his guard. “It’s alright, Moonlight. Tali here’s cool.”

“Cool?” the griffon raised an eyebrow. “Who are you calling cool, pipsqueak? I’m the hottest griffon in all Equestria,” she said as she stepped away from Thomas and struck a heroic pose. “How do ya think I made it into Celestia’s bed?”

With that, Moonlight looked down and realized Talon was a member of Celestia’s harem and extinguished her horn, though she kept her eye firmly on the griffon. “Forgive my earlier threat. I did not know that the two of you were friends.”

“Don’t apologize,” Thomas instructed before looking back at the still posing Talon. “You shouldn’t have shoved her like that,” he scolded.

“Meh,” Talon shrugged. “No big. What’s this little pony going to do to me anyway?” She asked as she stepped up to Moonlight, pressing her bare breasts against the guard’s breast plate as she stared down at the shorter pony.

“Little?” Moonlight snarled as she straightened her back, but it did little to close the gap between their heights. The tension was palpable.

“Hey. Hey. Whoa,” Thomas coaxed as he moved himself between the large women, internally scolding himself for deliberately getting into a position where people could knock him out just by falling on him. “There’s no reason to start anything here.”

“Aww,” came a complaint from somewhere out in the cafeteria. Most ponies stuck to their own conversations, but a few of the nearby tables were watching events unfold with great curiosity.

“Why don’t we just calm down and shake hands as friends?” Thomas suggested hopefully.

After a few more seconds of glaring, Talon broke out into a giggle. “Not bad, pony,” she complimented. “Most of you guards back down when I stare down at you like that, but you held your own. You’re alright in my book,” she held out her claw. “Name’s Talon, concubine in Princess Celestia’s harem and former Sergeant in the Royal Griffon Reserves.”

The unicorn offered a respectful grin and took the griffon’s claw and gave it a friendly shake. “Private First Class, Moonlight Shield. I’m currently assigned as guard to Luna’s Senior Concubine.”

No matter how often any pony said ‘concubine’, the word never ceased to sound weird to Thomas. Regardless, he was grateful this hadn’t turned into a catfight, or whatever you’d call a fight between females of different species where one actually was half cat. The three took their seats at the table and began to eat. Thomas had somehow found himself in the middle of the two larger women with the armored mare to his left and the soft yet muscled griffon to his right.

“So what were you two talking about before I stepped in and improved the scenery?” Talon asked, taking deep slow breaths to draw attention to her breasts.

“The parasprite invasion in Ponyville,” Thomas answered.

“Ah. How did that mess even start to begin with?” Talon inquired. “I mean, the way I hear it, that pink pony was the first to identify the parasprites and then she spent the next few hours gathering instruments for the parade while her friends bumbled around. Shouldn’t they have listened to her from the start and saved themselves a whole mess of trouble?”

“Maybe she wasn’t very direct about it,” Thomas suggested. “I hear she can be a little silly so…”

“But she was their friend,” Talon defended. “Plus she’s one of the freaking Elements of Harmony. Shouldn’t that mean something?”

“Well…” Thomas chose his next words carefully so as not to reveal too much. “From what I hear, the Elements bonded to them because of their personalities and she’s the Element of Laughter. Just because they have certain personality types, doesn’t necessarily make them authority figures.”

“No. I think Talon’s got a point,” Moonlight added. “The Elements of Harmony are a magic that predates Equestria. Power like that isn’t given out to just anypony. Those six were deemed worthy by an ancient and arcane magic and then used that magic to vanquish… er… free Princess Luna.” It was an unspoken rule among the night court to avoid mentioning Nightmare Moon. “This is probably an appeal to authority fallacy, but I can’t help but think that that at least means their opinions should be heard.”

“Thank you,” Talon threw up her hands in exasperation. “You’re the first pony I’ve talked to who actually agrees with me on this. If the Elements had bonded with griffons, we’d have handled matters a lot differently.”

Moonlight waved her hand encouraging Talon to go on.

“Well,” the griffon continued, “first thing we’d do is immediately conscript them into the RGR and give them all training, in self-defense if nothing else. A weapon like that needs to be protected. Second, we’d move them to the capitol where they’d be in a central position that could easily be deployed wherever needed.”

“The first part, maybe, but I’m not so sure on the second part,” Moonlight argued. “The Elements of Harmony aren’t an ordinary weapon that you use to just blast anything in your path. I’m not sure if I can explain this properly, but a lot of advanced magic has this philosophical and emotional aspect to it. You’d want to keep the Elements’ operators happy and harmonious so that they can still use the Elements. If their personalities change, like if they went through boot camp, then you run the risk of compromising their compatibility with the magic.”

Talon stroked the bottom of her beak ponderously. “Well, what would you do miss smarty-corn?”

“I think we need to reassign a few soldiers from the army to Ponyville. Since that’s where the operators live, the best way to keep the harmony is to let them live where they want with their friends and family. The soldiers would spend most of their time patrolling the town, since I hear it’s sorely lacking any kind of police force anyway. But they’d also spend a few days a week training the Elements’ operators and be on standby to offer their support whenever there was some sort of emergency. That way, even if Thomas is right and the Element of Laughter is a little silly, then at least there would have been some trained professionals nearby who could recognize that she knew what those things were and then help her deal with them.”

Thomas smirked at Moonlight’s words. Not only was he happy that she’d begun to open up, but he had made that very suggestion to Celestia. She refused because she thought it would be too much of an intrusion in their lives and the peace of the quaint little town.

And so we introduce Talon, the griffon in Celestia's harem and friend to Thomas. She's aggressively affectionate, but a good friend to have in your corner.

Also, I imagine most people will be relieved at the lack of yaoi with Blue Blood.