“Huh. Ah know you said it was empty, but Ah never thought it’d be this empty,” Honey remarked as she gestured ahead. The moon had almost climbed to its peak overhead, adding its illumination to the street lights, and the green mare held a classically styled picnic basket under one arm.

“I know, right? Total waste,” Surprise agreed as she merrily skipped onto the court on the park’s outskirts, her hooves clopping on the hard surface. Her wings provided extra lift as she ascended roughly ten feet with each step. Additionally, she kept her hands behind her back as she hummed while holding an orange ball under one arm.

“Show off,” Honey said as she found a suitable spot to set the basket; out of the way, but still close enough so they could reach it in case of attempted theft. “But yer right. Ah keep hearin’ the Canterlot nightlife’s s’posed ta be growin’, yet no pony can muster the time ta play a little basketball? Shame.”

“Agreed,” Surprise said as she sat on one of the goals and rested her hooves on the hoop. “Though, I think the nightlife just means shopping and stuff. Stores are open at night, but I guess it’s still taking ponies a while to play under the stars,” she added as she looked up.

“Oy, get that big butt down here before ya break somethin’! Ah don’t wanna have ta pay some fine ta replace nothin’.”

“Oh, p’lease. You’d laugh your plot off and then tell the others until they did the same,” Surprise dismissed. “Tell me that wouldn’t be worth a few bits.”

Honey blinked. “That’s beside the point. What matters is Jonagold’d be right furious at me fer breakin’ public property. Then Ah’d get… disciplined,” she trailed off as her cheeks reddened.

Surprised leaned down as her ears pivoted forward. “Do tell.”

“Well, maybe Ah might’ve let slip a couple things Ah do in the harem. Nothin’ big. Jus’ a few tricks Ah thought mah herd might like. ‘N’ maaaybe Jona took to ‘em a little too well.”

“Oh-ho-ho. Somepony’s naughty,” Surprise teased.

“Would ya’ll jus’ get down already!?”

Surprise whickered her lips as she fluttered to the ground. “Fine, but you’re spilling the beans if I win.”

“Ah thought the rules said we wasn’t allowed to talk about this stuff outside the you-know-what. Ah feel like Ah’m pushin’ things enough jus’ tellin’ mah herd.”

“Two things.” Surprise held up two fingers and pressed the first down. “A, that only applies to harem stuff. Your herd gets no protections. And B, I’m your bestie, and I want to know.”

“Bestie, huh?” Honey pondered. “Well, Ah guess that’s true enough, but don’t mah herd get some consideration?”

“It probably should, but you forgot point C, which plays off the rules established in B.”

“Which is?”

“I wanna know, and besties have executive privilege to ask.”

Honey snorted a laugh. “Yeah, Ah probably should’ve seen that comin’,” she agreed with a defeated sigh. “Fine, but what do Ah get if Ah win?”

Surprise gently passed the ball to Honey. “I could tell you some of the activities I’ve done outside the harem?”

Honey tossed the ball back, and the pair passed it several times as they warmed up. “Nah, ya’ll’d do that anyway.”

“Eh, true.”

“Ah want somethin’ equal ta sharin’ what should be at least a little private.”

“Like what?”

“Ah don’t know. A hundred bits, maybe?”

“Sounds about right. So, we good?”

This time, when Honey caught the ball, she didn’t return it. “Ah think so. Now, let’s work up an appetite,” she said as she dribbled the ball while approaching Surprise. They met in the court’s middle. “Standard rules. No bone-crushin’ strength.”

“And no wings,” Surprise agreed as she matched Honey’s competitive smirk. Just because they were playing for fun, that didn’t excuse them from giving it their all. “Three.”

“Two.”

“One!” They sounded in unison as Honey tossed the ball straight up, only to jump shortly after. She and Surprise had comparable leg strength, not including tribal differences. However, Honey miscalculated where the ball would fall and overshot the jump. She had to hurriedly adjust her arm to hit the target, but she could only do so at an awkward angle. Unfortunately, as was evident by this point, the pegasus got the ball first and put it into play.

Honey ran after Surprise and quickly pulled ahead, arms outstretched as she tried to block the mare’s shooting. However, true to her namesake, Surprise had a few tricks up her nonexistent sleeve. The rule on wings was generally understood to mean no flying and no physical contact. And while some might debate the matter, other things were technically allowed. For example, Surprise kept passing the ball between her hands while evading Honey’s efforts to swipe it away. She added wing stretches to elongate the passes, creating a distraction to throw off her opponent’s focus. Surprise had to keep this up irregularly to avoid Honey adjusting to any kind of rhythm, but it was still a nifty trick.

Luckily for Honey, the orange ball stood in stark contrast to the mare’s off-white fur, so the trick only worked for a few seconds before she caught on. Finally, she reached for an opening, but it was a feint, allowing Surprise to whirl around her opponent and make the first shot. It bounced off the board, then the rim, but missed the basket.

“Mah turn!” Honey declared as she ran for the ball, picked it up, and bounced it into play. Of course, this was just an informal game, and the rules were as flexible as the players were expected to be when on the clock. As such, Surprise ran after her opponent and tried to get ahead, but Honey anticipated this. She kept her back to the winged mare and an eye over her shoulder. The earth mare attempted several feints, but Surprise matched her every move, almost like she could read her opponent’s mind.

“It’s almost like I can read your mind, huh?”

Honey narrowed her eyes, but never stopped moving. “How’d ya’ll do that?”

Surprise extended her wings and gave them a light flap. “I can read air pressure, baby!”

Honey blinked. “What? That don’t make a lick ‘f sense. How can ya read anythin’ if we ain’t even in the air?”

“There’s air all around us, silly. I can basically take you on, blindfolded,” crowed Surprise.

“Yeah, we’ll see ‘bout that.” Honey lifted her leg high and stomped down. It wasn’t enough to crack the ground, but it was enough of a shockwave to send dust particles flying. That was Honey’s signal to skip feinting and charge ahead, looping under Surprise’s arm as she ran for the hoop. When all looked clear, she jumped and let the ball fly. She tracked its approach, measuring as it descended, inch after inch, definitely aiming for a clean swish. Then Surprise came out of nowhere and swiped the orb out of the air.

It was as though everything went in slow motion. Surprise came back to the ground while pointing at her wings fixed firmly to her back. Her smile was bright and beaming, almost as though she dared Honey to declare a rule violation.

Honey wasn’t petty enough to make such a baseless accusation. The pegasus might bend the rules for fun on occasion, but she wouldn’t break them. Instead, the earth mare charged with several thunderous hoof strikes to the ground, each carefully measured to create shockwaves of varying intensity to throw off Surprise’s supposedly omnipotent wings. “Suck on mah earthbending!”

“Oh, is that what we’re playing, now?” Surprise challenged as she weaved in a zigzag pattern to evade Honey’s advance. “Well, don’t make me break out the airbending. Haha, get it?”

“Ah’ll show you, breakin’!” Another stomp launched Honey like a rocked, catching Surprise off guard mid-dribble. The earth mare rolled a short distance before she resumed dribbling and doubled back toward her goal.

“Bring it, sister!” Surprise manically cheered as she ran to retrieve her lost property. Honey had power, but the white mare was light on her hooves. She gave her wings the tiniest, virtually imperceptible flaps to provide an extra boost, but only enough to compensate for Honey’s muscular leg pounds. After all, she didn’t want to cross the line into full-blown cheating. Although, the earth mare’s ground pounds irritated her inner ear and slightly threw off her balance. However, she still managed to get ahead and circle around her opponent to block her shot. “Stars, you’ve got loud hooves.”

“Thanks. Mah pa taught me ta do that in case a pegasus was ever botherin’ me,” Honey replied as she kept the ball from her opponent. “Hit the ground hard, but not the same kind ‘f hard. Make the poundin’ different ta throw ‘em off balance. I didn’t know about the wing readin’ thing, but now it makes sense.”

“Yeah, this is just like the bad old days before Equestria,” Surprise agreed. However, each time she thought she got a read on Honey’s movements, the earth mare would pound the ground once more. Finally, the pegasus had to retract her wings. Otherwise, somepony blowing an air horn in her ear every few seconds would have been less bothersome. “When mighty pegasus warriors would swoop down, snatch up yummy earth fillies, and eat them up like apple pie.”

“Jus’ try it, sweet cheeks. Ya’ll couldn’t lift me with three ‘f ya, so mah pie’s goin’ uneaten tonight.”

“That sounded like a challenge,” Surprise observed, her grin growing determined and dangerous.

“Challenges ‘r’ fer worthy opponents. Let me know if ya see any.”

Incensed, Surprise extended her right hand as if to swipe, forcing Honey to pull away. Of course, the earth mare didn’t expect a colossal pair of teats to come swinging from the left and knock the ball right out of her hands.

“Hey, that’s cheatin’!” Honey growled as both mares chased the ball.

“Show me in the rules where it says you can’t use teats! Mwahaha!” Surprise defiantly cackled as she dove for the ball, only for something to whack her butt and throw her off balance. She fell, but her wings quickly unfolded to slow her fall and soften the impact on her soft and supple airbags. Her head snapped up to see Honey with the ball and smirking.

“Teats ‘r’ in play, remember,” Honey taunted as she lightly slapped her left tit before charging to her intended goal. Surprise hurried to get up, but it was already too late. Honey shot and scored. “Point to the earth ponies! Surprisin’ absolutely no pony,” she mocked.

“Oh, is that what we’re doing now?” Surprise angrily growled as she ignored the ball and got up into Honey’s personal space, smashing their teats together as she stared up at her opponent. “Are we playing teat ball?”

Honey glowered back at Surprise. The two were roughly equal in height, but the green mare had an inch or two. Regardless, that added height gave her no extra courage as she stared down the bundle of little dog energy wrapped in a big dog’s body. “Don’t know,” she deadpanned with utmost seriousness. “Never played.”

“Neither have I,” Surprise said, hissing through clenched teeth. “But it sure sounds fun, huh?”

“It sure does,” Honey snarled back. “What ‘r’ the rules?”

“No hands, hooves, or other appendages. You can only touch the ball with your teats,” Surprise said with a soul-crushing scowl.

“What about plots?” Honey gravely questioned.

“That seems more like a team thing,” Surprise added in her regular, more jovial voice. “Like, somepony passes it to you, but you hip check it to your teammate. Knocking a ball into the hoop with just my plot sounds like it’d take a lot of practice, and I’d rather just play.”

“Fair point,” Honey courteously conceded and stepped back. Mashing boobies was fun, but it also hurt a little. “Also, we jus’ made a super discriminatory game,” she said as she lifted under her breasts and bounced them. “Only well-endowed mares can play, ‘n’ Ah can already hear Silver complainin’. Jus’ imagine her tryin’ ta do anythin’ with the ball with them itty bitty titties.”

“Hehe, that’s funny. It’s like teats, but sillier. Is that one of Thomas’ things?”

“Ah think so. He’s got a lot ‘f funny soundin’—whatcha call ‘em—synonyms?”

“Hehe, yeah. I’m picturing Silver, but her back’s bent, and she looks like a seal putting all her focus on keeping everything balanced.”

“Kay, so, does this mean teat ball is out? Ah wanna make sure we’re on the same page.”

“Maybe. Oh, but one more thing. What if we magically turned the others into balls?” Surprise excitedly proposed. “We could bounce them between our, uh… mega milkers.”

Honey stroked her chin in thought. “Change the game ta volleyball, ‘n’ ya might have somethin’. Ah don’t think they’d like the part where they hit the ground. Keep it exclusively teat contact.”

“Alright, that works. As for the game, let’s try it out so we can work out the bugs.”

Honey’s eyes narrowed. “What about the point Ah jus’ won?”

“Oh, I guess you can keep it,” Surprise said to Honey’s satisfaction, only for the happy-go-lucky mare’s wrathful expression to return. “Anyway, let’s try again. Only this time, I shall crush you beneath my mighty teats!”

“Oh? The pillow’s threatenin’ ta crush a boulder? That’d be somethin’.”

The pair got back into standoff position. “Three. Two. One.” Surprise bounced the ball to the ground. It ascended much lower than before as the mares each came from the right with their breasts. The ball briefly squished between their mammaries, only to go flying to one side. Surprise reached the sphere first. However, remembering the rule about hands, she pulled her tits apart, ducked low to scoop up the globe, and slapped her girls together like clamps upon the lucky sphere.

“Hehe, it’s like Moonlight’s head is sticking out.”

“That horn head is mine!” Honey growled as she grabbed under her breasts and threw them against Surprise’s mammaries. The white mare’s grip slipped, and the ball went flying. Honey caught it, mirroring Surprise’s gripping method, but she hadn’t accounted for the ball’s rough texture. “Ow, that hurt!”

“Uh oh, did your boobies get a booboo? Am I bad for hoping the answer is yes so I can kiss them better?”

“Nah, jus’ a little rough is all. Like takin’ Plow up the plot without greasin’ up first.”

Surprise winced.

“Okay, so maybe not that bad, but still not good,” Honey amended as she adjusted her awkward grip to something more comfortable. “I think I gotta hold it more in the middle. Otherwise, mah girls stretch around the base.”

“We’re learning so much tonight,” marveled Surprise. “I wonder if this was how all sports were invented.”

“A couple ‘f idgets hangin’ out in the middle ‘f the night ‘n’ lookin’ fer excuses ta smash their bodies together?” Honey proposed as she achieved an ideal grip. “Yeah, probably. Anywho, let’s get goin’!”

Surprise came in from Honey’s blind spot and swiped her white marshmallows up and under Honey’s green melons.

“Ow!”

“Shoot, I’m sorry,” Surprise said as the ball came back down, where she effortlessly caught it with her teats. “Too hard?”

“How d’ ya’ll do that?” Honey demanded in mild offense at Surprise’s ease. “That thing’s like sandpaper on mah girls, but ya’ll don’t give a lick how ya hold it. What gives?”

Surprise beamed. “Well, it’s like you said. Your boulders against my pillows. Pillows are soft and bend around stuff, but boulders just crumble under pressure.”

“So, it’s come ta pass. Havin’ the mightiest teats in the land has finally come ta bite me in the ass. Ah knew this day would come,” Honey dramatically bemoaned.

“Two things. First, you saw this coming?” Surprise asked. “Honey, I had no idea you were an Oracle. And second, you’ve got a pretty high opinion of yours—Agh!” The white mare grunted in protest when a pair of green, tit-shaped boulders whacked her face. She went flying, but extended her wings before suffering any damage. She rubbed her sore cheek as she looked up at the green mare. “Ya know, lots of scholars question how earth ponies held their own when the pegasi had aerial domination. Bodies as hard as rocks seem like a good explanation.”

Honey smirked. “We ain’t hard all the time. We’re a little like stallions. We only get nice ‘n’ firm when we need to. Otherwise, we’re soft as kittens.”

Surprise stretched the kinks from her jaw as she continued holding the ball. “Okay, experience tells me that’s probably true, but I still wanna test to make sure.”

“Typical sneaky pegasus. Always changin’ the rules midgame when ya know yer losin’.”

Surprise smirked as her eyes narrowed to dangerous slits. “You’re gonna wake up tomorrow with a pineapple where you didn’t expect.”

“Promise?” Honey asked with a cheeky grin.

The mares squared off once more, facing each other down as the wind blew, cooling their slightly sweaty bodies. A random bell from a nearby shop acted as the alarm, setting both mares lunging to attack. Honey held her boobs’ sides for a full-frontal assault, but the ball was already gone. Surprise had dropped it, used her tits to smack Honey’s away, and then picked up the ball on its return bounce before dancing around the earth mare and running. Honey tried repeating her maneuver from earlier and threw her boobs at Surprise’s butt. However, the white mare was prepared this time and shot her booty back to counter her opponent. Luckily, Honey had anticipated such a move and redoubled her tit tackle. In the battle of booby against booty, there were no losers, except for anyone who wanted to be involved, but couldn’t. It sucked to be those guys. Also, Surprise’s pillowy flexibility was no match for a head-on blow from Honey’s rock-hard tatas, so the pegasus fell and dropped the ball.

With limited time to act before her opponent did something wild, Honey decided to get creative first. She squatted down and slapped the top of the ball with her tits, bouncing it up. On its return trip down, she only opened her breasts a little to catch the ball with the top of her tits. Friction ensured the sphere stayed in place with relatively minimal effort compared to previous attempts. “Ha!” Honey crowed at her trick and ran for her target, boobies in hand and ball threatening to hit her chin. “This is so weird!” she proclaimed with a laugh.

“You ain’t seen nothin’ yet!” Surprise proclaimed as she seemingly came out of nowhere, fire in her eyes. She charged from the side and fixed her gaze on Honey, intent on doing something drastic. Her lips pulled up in a slight smirk when she saw her opponent’s fear. Then, boobies in hand, Surprise pulled her melons apart, stretching them so far that Honey almost tripped in sympathetic pain.

The green mare didn’t know what was coming until it had already eclipsed the moon. Surprise’s wings were outstretched as she hovered over the earth mare like an albino night angel. Finally, the pegasus released her tits, which snapped back into alignment like the world’s tightest rubber band with a thunderous and fleshy smack, right around Honey’s head. The poor thing dropped like a stone and nearly hit the ground. Luckily, Surprise demonstrated a level of aerial acrobatics not often seen outside sports shows, spinning like a ballerina to swoop in and save Honey. The white mare held the green one like a knight bemoaning his fallen love.

“Oy, you awake?” Surprise asked as she rapidly and persistently tapped Honey’s cheek. “Oh, stars. I didn’t kill you with my teats, did I?” The white mare wedged her head between her friend’s melons with a cartoonish pop and pressed her ear to the sternum. “Heart’s still beating. Thank the alicorns,” she sighed in relief. However, as she tried extricating her skull, she encountered a snag. “H-hey! I’m stuck!”

“Dirty trick.”

Surprise froze when she heard the malicious grin in her friend’s voice. She tried pulling harder, but to no avail. The booby cage was too strong.

“Ya know, Ah hear a lot ‘bout how pegasi do purty good in thin air,” Honey taunted as her hands firmly squished her tatas over her opponent’s head. “Makes a mare wonder. Jus’ how long ‘til ya’ll suffocate?”

Surprise stopped struggling. “Okay, wow. That got dark,” she stated, her voice muffled by the fleshy prison.

“Yeah, maybe a little,” Honey allowed. “But Ah’m still mad ya’ll did that. Ain’t no way that kind o’ move is legal in any sport.”

“You mean the move you’re doing right now?”

“Well, yeah, but the game’s already over. Yer disqualified fer pullin’ that illegal move. This is yer penalty box.”

While Honey remained sitting, Surprise pulled herself up, so she was standing while bent over at a ninety-degree angle and tapping her hoof to the pavement. “So your idea of punishment is to stick my head between your… uh, mega milkers, and that’s supposed to discourage my bad behavior?”

Honey averted her gaze. “Dang it! Why does havin’ perfect tits always have ta come back ‘n’ bite me?”

“Are you still on about that?”

“You don’t understand,” Honey dramatically bemoaned while fighting a smirk as she stared from the back of Surprise’s headless neck, down her back, and to the poofy tail wagging between the mighty cleft of her bum. “Ya’ll can’t possibly know what it’s like ta have teats so grand; they know they’re too good fer ya, so they never do what ya want ‘em to.”

“Keep talking like that, boulder butt, and I’m telling Luna,” Surprise threatened.

“Pssh, like Ah’m s’posed ta be afraid o’—”

“Excuse me.”

“Gah!” Honey jumped, accidentally tightening her grip on Surprise’s head and pulling her to the side. She looked off past the court’s edge to a brown stallion who was still trying to figure out what he was seeing.

“Um, is everything alright?”

“Move along, sir,” Surprise dismissed with a wave, her voice still muffled. “We’re just having a friendly spat. Nothing to see here.”

“Um, if you say so,” the stallion uncertainly allowed and walked away, keeping his eyes on the odd duo for as long as he could.

“Was he looking at my plot?” Surprise asked. “I bet he was looking at my plot.”

“Well, ya got it all hangin’ out up there like a signal fire. Ah’d look, too.”

“I knew it!” Surprise slammed her fist into her palm in vindication. “Also, while this smells nice, the air’s starting to get pretty thin, so…”

“Oh, sorry,” Honey said and finally released her friend. “Still, Ah hope ya’ll learned yer lesson from this.”

Surprise beamed. “I learned that if you slap your teats on a mare’s face, she’ll respond in kind. That’s a lesson I intend to pass down through the ages,” she somberly avowed, only for her growling stomach to kill the mood.

“Ya ready ta eat?”

“Definitely. Although did you bring marshmallows? I’m really craving marshmallows for some reason.”

Honey good-naturedly rolled her eyes and chuckled. “Nah, but I got some toasty hot buns if yer interested.”

The pair shared a laugh back to the basket and set up their picnic. They then ate shoulder-to-shoulder as their tails low-key wrestled for dominance.

“This is nice,” Honey said as she bit into her sandwich. “Jus’ a couple o’ gal pals havin’ a picnic under the stars. Ah should do this with Jona ‘n’ Plow sometime.”

“Plow is your gal pal?” Surprise asked after spitting out some melon seeds. “That must make Hearts and Hooves awkward.”

“Quit it,” Honey said as she shoved Surprise’s shoulder. She then let herself be shoved back, but didn’t continue the squabble. Instead, she resumed staring at the stars. “Luna sure went all out tonight.”

“Hmm, ya think so?”

“Ya’ll don’t?”

“Last week’s stars were prettier, so I think she’s taking a rest tonight.”

Honey chuckled. “Ya’ll call this a rest? If this were fireworks, ‘efore the Summer Sun Celebration was like a couple o’ sparklers, while this is that show they do up in Manehatten.”

“Yeah, but that’s my point,” Surprise clarified. “We’re finally seeing a professional at work, but it’s like she’s still rusty and getting back into her old groove.”

Honey was quiet for a while as she let this idea sink in. “Still? … Whoa.”

“Yeah,” Surprise sighed and rested her head on Honey’s shoulder as they both stared into the sky. “Our mare paints some pretty pictures.”

“She sure does,” Honey agreed and wrapped her hand around Surprise’s waist, pulling the white mare close. “She sure does.”

So, ages ago, I watched the anime Keijo. It had the kind of ridiculous energy that I absolutely adore. Anyway, I posted a story about the Mane Six playing the game… way too late to catch the hype from the show’s initial run, but I guess I had a little more in me. Call me crazy, but sexy ladies crashing their heavy assets into one another just has a hold over me that I simply can’t explain, but I hope you guys enjoy it. Anyway, I’m continuing the dating arc for a little bit more, and this is another pairing checked off the list.

And thanks to my subscribers
Tier 1: User#56e9c67c
Tier 2: Neural Shock, Haveclav, captainrex2020, Magetsu88, and Sneaking Sneker
Tier 3: Drake565, brainloki3, and Shiyakazing
You guys make all of this possible. And if you want early access to my work, and to support an artist you enjoy, please check out my SubscribeStar as well. It'd mean a lot https://subscribestar.adult/typist-gray