“What happened to you? Wait, don’t answer that,” Rainbow said dryly as Pinkie sat herself down at their usual table.

Grinning, Pinkie winked as she placed her paper lunch bag on the table, “Let’s just say I managed to get through to our new Principal! And boy, he got me good!”

Applejack’s eyes went wide, “He pulled a fast one on ya? That’s a might strong feat!”

“What the hell did he do?” Rainbow looked surprised, “I’ve seen you predict Dan Brown books.”

“At first, he was acting as stiff as board! Hoo-wee! Then he’s all, ‘You’re in soooo much trouble!’, all serious and dark! I felt scared!” Pinkie pouted, but then grinned, “Then he started laughing! Turned out, he was pranking me! I swear he had some sixth sense about me and just went all out! Wow!”

Twilight blinked a few times, nearly dropping her fork, “Wow… Sounds to me like he’s right on your level, Pinkie.”

“He made you think you were in trouble?” Rainbow looked surprised, “For what?”

“All my… sexy stuff,” Pinkie said in a low, mysterious voice, and grinned again, “The way he called me out on it, I swear I was actually gonna get written up for it! That it was actually going to go on my record and I’d be, well, screwed! And not in the fun way!”

The five of them all looked up, “Wow, really?” It was no surprise to any of them that Pinkie got away with things that would land most other students in a heap of trouble. A lot of people were curious how she always managed to stay in people’s good graces.

“Mm-hmm!” Pinkie said, unpacking her lunch, “Oh, I thought I was done for! But like I said, he started laughing and it was all one big jokey joke! He was even saying that the GPA in this school was the highest in Equestria! Holy macaroni! Can you believe it?!”

“I can,” Twilight chimed in, “I searched the GPA records before I came to this school, and I was floored. It was part of why my parents wanted to have me attend here.”

Rarity looked from Twilight to Pinkie, “What does any of that have to do with you?”

“Weeelll….” Pinkie winked at her friends, giggling, “I didn’t even get to the best part! You see, I-”

“-ended up somehow getting sexually involved with him because he’s apparently real perverted and enjoys this kind of thing, and he knows the real reason why GPA’s are so high up. It’s ‘cause you manage to boost everyone’s morale so freaking well!” Rainbow cut her off.

They all looked at her with surprise.

“...What? It’s Pinkie. What’d you think was going to happen?”

“...That maybe for once someone in this school had some degree of ethics?” Twilight frowned.

Pinkie pouted, “I’m sorry, Twi-Twi…”

Twilight looked up, “Just… how do you do it? You’re always off partying, making friends, and having sex. And yet you get better grades than I do!”

“Multitasking!” Pinkie said with a smile, rubbing her back, “Like, for example, I can bake some tasty muffins while I’m studying for Chemistry! Orrrr… I can do Math while I’m decorating the gym for the next dance! And plus, I have photographic memory, Twi-Twi! I put all that stuff to use for anything I do!”

Twilight huffed petulantly, turning back down to her physics book as she popped another grape into her mouth.

“...With the principal? Really?” Applejack asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Why not? I think he’s sexy,” Pinkie giggled, “Oh, come on! A lot of girls go for the older men or women!”

“Yeah, but he’s a principal!” Applejack sighed, “I swear to god, Pinkie. One of these days you’re gonna hurt yourself.”

Pinkie looked at her with confusion, tilting her head, “But… I always take precautions to make sure the environment won’t harm me! Why would I get hurt?”

“Hey Twi, gotta dictionary?” Applejack asked.

Twilight silently held one up for her. Applejack took it and opened it to a page, sliding it over to Pinkie and pointing at a single entry.

SCANDAL, NOUN (SCAN-DUL)

An incident or event that disgraces or damages the reputation of the persons or organization involved.

“That’s why.”

Pinkie read it over, then smiled, “Hey, don’t worry about it, Applejackie! I’ll be fine! He knows how I work, and how to… you know, pull some stringies!”

“What kind of strings?” Rarity asked, looking up in confusion.

“Covering tracks, of course!”

“That’s different from pulling strings, Pinkie,” Rarity said, shaking her head.

“Pinkie, we just don’t want anything to happen to you,” Fluttershy said softly, “This is a little more serious than just having sex with another student in… um, a janitor’s closet or something.”

“It’s okay, girls! I’ll be fine!” Pinkie assured them, waving it off, “We’ll work it all out! Promise! Besides, it’s not like I’ll be doing that every day!”

Both Applejack and Rarity sighed and returned to their schoolbooks. They’d learned a while ago that when Pinkie was dead set on something, there wasn’t any stopping her. Frankly if the school board couldn’t reign her in, what chance did they have?

“So… what happened in there anyway?” Rainbow asked curiously.

“You want aaaaaall the details, Dashie?” Pinkie snickered.

“Yeah, sure. Why not?” Rainbow shrugged. She’d always been the most laid back with Pinkie’s antics around school.

“Well, then!” Pinkie grinned, eating some more of her lunch, “We got to talking a little bit, and boy he’s so fun! Then I offered him a little classic blowjob… same ol’ stuff! So I get under his desk and I do what I doooo… Even when a teacher would come in to talk to him, he’d be all cool and calm like nothing was happening! Wow! I never knew that was possible! After I was done, I came back up, and then shook his hand. He was wearing a joy buzzer! Ha! Classic! Then before I left, he played with my hair and kissed my cheek! He’s sweet!”

“A joy buzzer?” Rainbow laughed, “Okay, the new principal is a child trapped in an old body!”

“Ha! Good one, Dashie! That’s so it!” Pinkie laughed, slapping her knee.

“So what are you gonna do with him?” Rainbow asked, flicking a wrapped behind her and into the trash can.

Pinkie shrugged a little bit, “I don’t know! I’m going to play it by ear and see what happens! But I know I’m going to throw a little party!”

“A party for what?” Rainbow asked, sitting up straight.

“Celebrating coming to this school, of course!” Pinkie grinned, “Like I do for all our new faculty!”

“It gonna be a normal Pinkie Pie party, or are you gonna be banging in the closet this time?” Rainbow snickered, much to the others’ chagrin.

Pinkie tapped her chin thoughtfully, humming, “Weeelll… I’ll go for a Normal Pinkie Pie party, since all the faculty will be there! Buuuut, I’ll leave the door open for that option, as well!” She took her drumsticks out of her hair and did the rimshot effect.

Rainbow chuckled, “Screw the others, Pinks. Don’t ever change, you’re too much fun.”

“Thanks, Dashie!” Pinkie smiled, reaching over and mussing up her hair, “You do the same!”

Rainbow smiled, her eyes briefly trailing down Pinkie’s body before she turned back to her lunch, “Thanks, Pinks.”

“You’re welcome!” Pinkie smiled, going back to her own lunch as well.

Discord glanced up from his work as he heard a soft knocking at the door.

“Enter,” he said disinterestedly.

The door opened, but no one came in, or went out. In fact, it was quiet for a few moments. Then the door closed by an unseen force. Still quiet, there was barely a sound to be heard.

At least, until a head of poofy pink hair and a pair of blue eyes peered up over his desk, a small nose planting itself on the surface.

Discord was quiet for a second, before raising an eyebrow, “...Yes?”

“Hi!” Pinkie grinned as she stood up now, holding a small container of muffins, “I wanted to bring you a little treat!”

“Aw, aren’t you a sweetie?” Discord smiled, setting down his paperwork and pushing back from his desk as Pinkie came around and sat on it.

“I do what I can!” Pinkie grinned, setting the container down and making herself comfortable, “Plus it gives me a reason to come see you!”

Discord glanced back down at Pinkie’s open file and snickered, “I’m sure you could come up with all sorts of reasons to come see me, my dear,” he chuckled as he took a muffin and bit off a piece.

“Ooooh, so it’s on!” Pinkie winked, “I certainly can!”

Discord chuckled and ate the rest of the muffin, “So how are you today, my dear?”

“I’m goooood,” Pinkie drawled, giggling as she spread her legs a little, “Doing as I always do! And how are you? Oooh ooh! Wait! Don’t tell me! Awesometacular? Bedazzled? Sweettatstic? Dazzled? Orrr… am I totally off the markie-mark and you’re the complete opposite of any of those things?”

“I’m positively marvelous,” Discord drawled with a smirk, making Pinkie purse her lips, “What? Not enough verbal confetti?”

“Hmm… I suppose it works!” Pinkie smiled, poking his nose, “You’ll learn! Or you’ve already learned and you’re just sloooowly getting to it soon!”

Discord chuckled, “Or I’ve already gotten to it and I’m just screwing with you like I was last week.”

“Hee! You’re too much!” Pinkie giggled, sitting back and spreading her legs some more, “You’re totally special!”

Discord smiled and glanced down at Pinkie’s legs, “Something you’re trying to tell me, sweetie?”

Wiggling a little, Pinkie winked, “Maybe I am… That is if you’re up to a little booty call from good ol’ Pinkie Pie, and that’s me!”

Discord casually glanced down Pinkie’s body. She was bigger than most of the girls in this school, her hips hugged by her jean shorts over her pink stockings. It gave her legs a very lovely curve to them. And Discord was a very lower-body centric kind of man. He slid his chair forward and ran a hand up Pinkie’s thigh.

“You’re quite the lovely girl,” he purred.

Pinkie blushed a little, giggling. Of course she was used to being complimented and enjoyed them, but it felt interesting to hear it from him. “Really? You likey?”

“Yes I do,” Discord smiled, running his hand over Pinkie’s shorts, “Tight clothes looks so good on bigger girls…”

“Tight clothes are fun!” Pinkie giggled, “I used to wear baggy work clothes when I was a kid… But when I started showing off my curves, I never looked back!”

Discord stood up, reaching a hand between Pinkie’s legs to gently press against the crotch of her jeans, “It’s almost a shame to undress you. You looks so lovely in pink and blue…”

“Awww, thankies!” Pinkie giggled happily, reaching over to gently tousle his hair, “That’s why I sometimes wear skirts and crotchless or no panties! Some folks like to screw me while I’m still dressed!”

“Goodness, you’re quite accommodating, aren’t you?” Discord purred as he came around and rubbed her shoulders.

Pinkie giggled and cooed in response, “Mm-hmm! It’s not just about my enjoyment. I want whoever I’m with to enjoy themselves, too! Even if it’s little touches like wearing a silly hat or some kind of bondage gear! O-kay, I don’t do that part too often, but I will if someone asks! I’m just not good at dominatrix… it feels so silly and I start laughing! I can’t help it! Then I ruin the mood and I feel bad because the other person loves that sort of thingy!”

“I’m starting to see how you can get away with so much,” Discord chuckled as he ran a hand down her back, rubbing between her shoulderblades.

Pinkie cooed and moaned happily as her muscles relaxed, “Aaaah, you’re good at this! Hee hee! Mmm… Well, they love me! Some kids say I’m a lovable slut!”

“You’d certainly bring new meaning to the word,” Discord chuckled as he pressed his fingers into Pinkie’s back, working out the surprising amount of tension in her muscles. He made a mental note to have the desk chairs looked at.

“Well, duh!” Pinkie winked over her shoulder, “When a guy has a lot of sex, he’s a stud. When a girl does it… that’s bad? Why? Well, I don’t know! It’s messed up! Being a slut isn’t a bad thing!”

“What I meant, sweetie, was that many other girls in your situation are far less… how should we put it… pleasant,” Discord snickered.

“Awww…” Pinkie pouted, “Well, don’t you worry about that! Not with me!”

“I’m sure,” Discord smiled, pushing Pinkie forward over his desk as he massaged deeper into her tense back, “Goodness, you’re tight back here…”

“Hee, yep!” Pinkie moaned happily, sighing in bliss, “Mmmm… soooo good! I needed that, for sure!”

“How on earth does your back get so knotted up?” Discord giggled, pressing his palm against Pinkie’s shoulders.

“Eh, you know! All the strenuous stuff catches up!” Pinkie shrugged a bit.

“A little too much bending over, sweetie?” Discord chuckled.

“Yeeaaah… you can say that!” Pinkie giggled, winking over her shoulder at him.

“Someone needs to make a special back pain medicine specifically for taking it in the ass,” Discord snickered as he rolled his hand in small circles over her back.

“Mm-hmm…” Pinkie giggled, leaning over the desk a bit more and sighing happily, “Thankies for rubbing my back!”

“You’re welcome, my dear,” Discord smiled, leaning down and kissing her neck as he pressed more firmly.

Pinkie cooed and angled her head this way and that, giggling. She reached up and tousled his two-tone hair, letting out little moans of pleasure. “Mmm… you’re all warm and toasty!”

“Thank you…” he whispered sultrily as he kneaded the heel of his hand into her upper back.

The sound of his voice made her tingle, making Pinkie giggle happily. She’d heard all kinds of voices every day, even distinct ones. There was something about his voice, in any given inflection, that just worked her senses unlike anytime before. She squirmed happily, leaning back into his touch, closing her eyes to fully bask into the moment even without sight.

“Aaahh… hee hee! Careful, with that voice, you could end up giving me autonomous sensory meridian response tingles!” Pinkie giggled, wiggling happily.

Discord pulled back for a brief moment, raising an eyebrow. Giving a small shrug, he applied more pressure with both his hands, laying Pinkie flat against his desk as he massaged her back.

“Mmm…. thankies!” Pinkie cooed happily, stretching out a little, “At this rate I’m gonna flop over like a noodle it feels so good!”

“Hasn’t anybody ever massaged your back before?” Discord asked curiously.

Pinkie nodded, “Mm-hmm! Some of my friends can, Mrs. Cake does, but I try not to bother them about that.”

“Perhaps you should more often, your back is a tight mess,” Discord made a small tutting sound as he rubbed deeper.

“Okay!” Pinkie grinned, “I will!”

“There we go,” Discord smiled, rubbing in smaller, firmer circles.

“Mmm…” Pinkie hummed, stretching out again and sighing in bliss, “You’re too much!”

Discord looked up and chuckled, “You really don’t get pampered very much, do you?”

“Not really, not like this! My friends and other folks I love on offer all the time, but I tell them it’s okay! No need!” Pinkie said, waving her hand.

“Well we really should change that,” Discord smiled, reaching up and pressing firmly against her shoulders.

“Mmm… Maybe I should,” Pinkie smiled, peeking over her shoulder.

Discord smiled as she turned to look at him, “You’re a cute little thing.”

“Aw, thankies!” Pinkie grinned, “And you’re so handsome! I’ve never been with a man like you before!”

“Really? With how much you get around?” Discord chuckled as he kneaded the small of her back.

“Mm-hmm! Not just ‘cause of your clothing style, that’s just awesometastic!” Pinkie winked, “Something about the way you act and carry yourself is so unique! And I’ll never forget that pep rally when you just casually took a top hat and pulled out random things from it and threw them to everyone! That was hilariously coolie cool!”

Discord chuckled. Half of the student body seemed to think he was a monstrous stick in the mud, while the other half thought he kept his office stocked with crystal meth, “I’m unique? Coming from you, I’ll take that as a high compliment.”

“You’re welcome!” Pinkie giggled, resting her chin on her hand, “One of my friends wondered if you were high on something! I said sugar. She looked at me and said, ‘No, that’d be you.’”

Discord laughed as he slid Pinkie’s shirt up, pressing his fingers into her back, “Sugar is an uncontrolled substance. Everyone can get high on it.”

“Yep! Everyone just seems to think I’m perpetually high on it,” Pinkie giggled, “Weeelll… I have sweet candies on a daily basis, so yes, I kinda am!”

“Well, that explains this,” Discord smirked, reaching one hand down to squeeze her rear.

“Oooh!” Pinkie squeaked, giggling, “You got that right! Anything I ingest goes straight to my bum bum!”

Discord chuckled and brought his hands back up to her shoulders, pressing harder as he unwound a particularly nasty knot in her shoulder. Pinkie moaned happily and relaxed all the more against his desk. It really had been quite a while since she’d been rubbed down extensively. She was definitely going to consult her masseuse-savvy friends for a little pampering fun in the future.

For now, she enjoyed the touch of his hands, melting all the more. Pinkie closed her eyes and lay her head against a small pile of papers, humming, “Oh my goodneeeesss…. soooo goodie! I might just have to hit you up for some rubbins and lovins more often!”

“My door is always open, Pinkie,” Discord purred, leaning down and kissing the back of her head as he trailed circles down her back.

“Thankies, Dissy!” Pinkie giggled, “Oh, but if you don’t like that one, it’s okay! I’ll come up with a nickname for you! It can take a while sometimes, but I can do it!”

“That’s just fine,” Discord giggled, pressing down on her spine and sliding his hand up, popping each vertebra.

“Okay!” Pinkie sighed happily, wiggling gently, “Ooh, I love feeling your hands on me! You’re so good!”

“That’s good to hear, because you’re so tense for someone who’s so chipper all the time,” Discord chuckled.

Pinkie tapped her chin thoughtfully, “Mmm… I guess I try to ignore it sometimes! It’s not so bad, I just get achy on some days.”

“You poor dear,” Discord purred, moving out to the sides of her back and unwinding the tension there.

“Ooohhh… mmm…. oohh yessss…” Pinkie cooed, her arms going limp over the edge of the desk.

“Enjoying ourselves, are we?” Discord chuckled.

“I sure am, Dissy! I appreciate you doing this for me!”

“It’s my pleasure, Pinkie,” Discord smiled brightly as he gently patted his fists against her back.

“Ooohh yes….” Pinkie cooed happily, feeling the pleasured tingles travel south. “Just a little lower…”

Discord lowered his hands down to the small of her back and patted her in a steady rhythm, stopping every few pats to knead her muscles.

It was heavenly. Pinkie cooed and sighed in bliss, feeling like she was practically floating at this point. The tension was ebbed away, leaving her feeling more light and perky as she ever was. She stretched a little, then let herself relax again as the massaging continued. If it was going to feel this good every time, she was planning to make it a weekly must. It also helped that the pleasured sensations were having an affect on her sex, which was practically begging for attention at this point. But for once, she decided to wait for now. Just until the right moment.

“Ooohh Dissyyyy…” Pinkie cooed, peeking over her shoulder a bit, “You’re sooo amazing!”

“And that would be the sixth time,” Discord chuckled, pressing down just above her hips at one of the last places he could find any knotted muscles.

“Hee hee… I’ll say it as often as you like!” Pinkie winked.

Discord reached up and patted her cheek before returning to her back, “Wonderful…”

“Mmm… ooohh… yes… that’s it…” Pinkie cooed, wiggling her hips a bit.

Discord glanced down, watching her rear shake as he unwound the tension in her back, finally stopping as he cracked his knuckles, “I think that should do it, my dear.”

“Aaaahhh…” Pinkie went limp and giggled, “So much better! Thankies again! I feel soooo good!”

Discord patted her back as he straightened out her shirt, returning to his chair and sitting down, “It was my pleasure, sweetie.”

Pinkie managed to get up, feeling revitalized and ready to face the day. Even if she wanted to just float around like a balloon. She stretched, then fell to the floor on her rump, “Oop! I fell down! Hee hee! My legs feel like rubber!”

Discord laughed and came around to help her up, “I guess I was too good?”

“Hee! Maybe!” Pinkie took his hand, managing to stand herself up.

Discord leaned in and kissed the top of her head, “You silly girl.”

Pinkie giggled from the tender gesture, her cheeks heating up. She stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek, “That’s me! See you tomorrow, Dissy! You rock!”

Winking, she then left his office, giggling and feeling dreamy as ever. If not moreso than usual.

“Hey Pinkie,” came Twilight’s voice as she came out of the study hall, “...Whoa, what’s got you so giddy?”

Looking at her, Pinkie broke into a huge smile and embraced her, giggling, “Nothing much, I just feel soooo awesometacular!” She kissed her cheek, nuzzling her, “You smell soooo good, Twi-Twi!”

Twilight blanked for a minute, “Uh… what just happened?”

“What do you mean?” Pinkie looked at her, tilting her head cutely.

“You’re just… more… Pinkie than usual,” Twilight said, pulling back from her.

“Well, I feel better! I got some lovins and rubbins!” Pinkie cooed, winking at her.

Twilight balked, “Right in the principal’s office?!”

“Yeppers!” Pinkie said with a nod, bouncing along as they walked, “Secretary and VP were none the wiser!”

“Pinkie, really? I mean, during… wait, is that why you weren’t in History class?” Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow.

“May-be,” Pinkie winked.

Twilight huffed. She always thought it wasn’t fair how Pinkie could miss classes and spend most of her time having sex and still manage to find the time to do better in school than she did. She often wondered if she bribed teachers for good grades, but she never dared voice that thought.

Pinkie looked at her, sensing some contention, and stopped walking. She took her friends hand, squeezing her comfortingly, “What’s the matter, Twilight? You look upset.”

Twilight yanked her hand away from Pinkie, “Of course I do! I work my ass off for years to do well in school, and you’re always doing better than I am! And you don’t even go to class half the time! You’re lounging around the place dropping your panties for anyone who asks! Why the fuck do I have worse grades than the school slut!”

Pinkie looked at her with slightly wide eyes, but kept her expression neutral. She was used to this sort of emotional response from someone, whether they were venting to her or at her. Of course she knew to some extent how Twilight felt about this, she hadn’t gotten this passionate about it. She didn’t even feel hurt, not in the slightest. If anything, she felt bad. Making someone feel this way stung at her gut, especially it being such a close friend who meant so much to her.

Nonetheless, she remained where she was, focused on Twilight and not saying anything.

“I mean how the hell are you doing it? Is everyone right?! Are you just sucking cock for good grades so you never have to do any fucking work in your life?!” Twilight snapped, her voice getting louder and louder, “That would at least put some sense to the world so I know I’m not living in the land of sunshine and rainbow unicorns! So which one is it?! Are you some magical creature that always has enough time for everything?! Or are you just another girl whoring herself through life?! Which one is it?!”

Admittedly, Pinkie was taken aback by this, but didn’t falter. Even though she knew some of her peers were jealous of how she could manage-she’d never seen it like this before. She looked at Twilight as she ranted, resisting the urge to hug her. No, she couldn’t do that yet. She had to let her get this out of her system. Pinkie wanted to cry, wanted to apologize profusely for making Twilight feel insignificant. Even though not her intent, it wasn’t something she wished anyone to feel. She exhaled lightly, but otherwise didn’t make much movement or sound.

Twilight seethed as she glared at Pinkie, her breathing coming to a slow as her glare softened, “...Oh my god, Pinkie… I’m so sorry…”

Eyes going wide, Pinkie was surprised it came this early. Nonetheless, she gave Twilight a sympathetic and understanding smile and hugged her. “It’s okay, Twilight. You needed to vent. I’m sorry I make you feel that way.”

“No no no, I shouldn’t… I shouldn’t have called you a…” Twilight wrapped her arms tightly around Pinkie’s shoulders and buried her face into her neck, “Pinkie, I’m so sorry…”

Holding her tighter, Pinkie nuzzled her hair in comfort and stroked it, “It’s okay, Twi-Twi. You were just upset, that’s all. I still accept your apology, though! And you know what? You’re the smartest girl I know, Twi-Twi. I don’t deserve half the credit I get. But you have the potential for ultimate academic awesomeness, and you always will.” She stroked her hair some more, nuzzling her, “You know you can talk to me about how you feel, Twilight. Promise! I just want you to feel better and have a soft place to fall.”

Twilight murmured quietly and clung tighter to her as Pinkie stroked her hair, her books having fallen forgotten in a pile at her feet as she buried herself in Pinkie’s comforting embrace.

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