Doctor and Ditzy’s Science Theater

by Rixizu

Episode 15 - Part 2

Finding a Favorite Weapon

Rainbow Dash was the first pony to move.

Ditzy: It didn’t take much to convince Rainbow Dash to kill all of her friends.

Doctor: (Rainbow) Screw you ponies! I’m not going to die here!

She seemed to have spawned at the top of a platform. She tried to use her wings to fly off, but she suddenly remembered that the necklace she was wearing had magic powers that forbid her from flying.

Doctor: So she fell to her death.

Ditzy: Ouch, a negative score already.

She jumped down to the very bottom and began to search for weapons.

Doctor: (Rainbow) Ha! The perfect weapon! Nopony will be able to stop me with this!

Ditzy: (Celestia) That’s a broom…

She came across an odd looking metal floor and stepped on it. There was a loud noise and the metal floor raised her up quickly. Rainbow Dash felt her stomach do flip flops and the force of the lift almost sent her air borne. There in front of her face was a new weapon! She stood there and stared at it for a moment.

All: (Rainbow) Ooooooo….pretty!

As she was about to walk over to get it the metal platform lowered and she found herself on the lower ground again. "Hey! That's not fair! I was just about to grab a weapon when the platform decided to lower again! How come it won't go up again?!"

Doctor: (Celestia) Sorry Ms. Dash, but you only a 5 second chance to get that weapon. Now you will have to look for another one.

Princess Celestia spoke to her. "These platforms are called lift jumps. Once stepped on, they will raise into the air and stay erect for a short time.

Ditzy: Short time? That was only like 2 seconds!

They are all timed as to how long they stay up and you will get the feel for how long they stay in the air before they fall back down.

Doctor: (Celestia) Often too quickly for you to actually do something.

On this version of the arena, you can reactivate the lift jump simply by walking off the platform and stepping back on it, or by simply jumping up and down in place.

Ditzy: What’s wrong with just a button?

In some arenas, or different versions of arenas, lift jumps will actually continue to lower up and down without you having to reactivate them. It all depends on the preference of an arena creator.

Ditzy: Or how much a jerk they are.

Princess Luna and I spent much of our time creating these arenas

Doctor: So much so Equestria’s economy has collapsed and the country is in anarchy.

and we have saved all of the older versions of our works,

Doctor: (Luna) About that….

because it would be a shame to just forget about them after all of the hard work we put into them. Most of the newer versions of the arena's lift jumps will continue to rise and fall without a player having to reactivate them."

Doctor: (Yawns) How fascinating.

Ditzy: Can we get to the fighting already?

"But why are there different versions of the same arena? Why don't we just play on the most updated versions of an arena?" Rainbow asked

Ditzy: The Princess thought the new version ruined everything they loved about the arena and refused to play it.

Doctor: (Celestia) The lift jumps stay in the air .5481 seconds longer than the last version! Sacrilege!

"Because some players, such as I, prefer many of the older versions of some of the arenas and the environments were often changed during the redesigning process.

Doctor: (Pony) Gah! Version 5 of Cathedral of Blood is like so lame. Version 4.5 is where it’s at!

I have a feeling that your friend, Rarity could perhaps help us with creating and decorating new arenas in the future.

Ditzy: Do you have any idea what you are asking?

Doctor: (Rarity) I will make this arena FABULOUS!

Other players may like the idea of having to manually reactivate a lift jump too.

Doctor: In the end, does it really matter all that much?

It's best to have more options available when choosing to play on an arena.

Doctor: I’m sure many players flock to a map because of manually reactivating lift jumps.

Some of the older versions of arenas give off great nostalgia as well,

Ditzy: Nostalgia? Just how old is this game anyway?

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even if they are not designed as well as the newer versions when it comes to top tier play level and competition.

Doctor: And they have exploitable bugs that make the game easy to win.

Go on, Rainbow Dash. Reactivate the lift jump."

Ditzy: (Rainbow) Don’t tell me what to do!

Rainbow Dash jumped up and down and the platform raised up once more. She quickly stepped off of it and walked over to the new weapon. As she traveled over it, the weapon disappeared. Rainbow Dash was suddenly confused.

Doctor: (Celestia) Just kidding! That was a fake weapon! You should’ve seen the look on your face!

The voice spoke to her again, "The weapon is now gone because the magic of your necklace picked it up and it's now in your inventory. Use your mind to go through the item slots and pick out the weapon!"

Rainbow Dash did so and suddenly the Enforcer she was holding disappeared and she brought out the new weapon.

Ditzy: The Semi-Automatic Muffin Shotgun!

The voice continued. "That weapon is called the Link Gun. It's primary fire is very powerful and if aimed properly, it can take down an opponent within seconds.

Doctor: Too bad it has the accuracy of a medieval musket.

The secondary fire is much less damaging, but has a unique effect that will slow your opponents down if you are able to continually keep the beam on your opponent."

Ditzy: (Rainbow) That’s lame. Why can’t it shoot explosions or something?

Rainbow Dash ventured across the arena looking for her first victim. She came across Rarity who happened to be staring at her Enforcer.

Ditzy: (Rarity) This is so gaudy. Whoever designed this has no taste at all! If you are going to design a weapon to destroy your enemies, at least make it gorgeous!

Rainbow Dash aimed her gun and fired. The bolts that came out of the gun began to cut away at Rarity's health points rapidly. Rarity's vision began to turn red and she noticed her health dropping faster and faster.

Suddenly the voice spoke to Rarity. "Rarity, it would be a good idea to run and fire your Enforcer at Rainbow Dash until you can find another weapon."

Ditzy: Thanks for pointing out the freaking obvious!

Rarity began to run in a zig-zag like pattern to avoid the powerful blasts of the Link Gun. Suddenly Rainbow Dash couldn't aim very well and remembered that there was a secondary fire mode that had the power to slow her opponent down. She quickly switched over to it and a laser like beam shot out of the gun and she was able to keep it on Rarity for a long enough time to slow her down. Rarity turned around and fired her Enforcer back at Rainbow Dash in a desperate attempt to get away, but it was too late. Rarity's health points dropped down to zero and she died. Her body turned into a skeleton upon death.

Doctor: Rarity finally lost all the weight she was working towards.

Suddenly, Princess Luna shouted out, "FIRST BLOOD!"

All: My ears!

Rainbow could see the bold red letters that spelled out first blood in her vision, and her eyes grew wide with horror. "Did I just murder my own friend?

Ditzy: (Rainbow) Oh well, I didn’t like Rarity much anyway.

Is she dead for good now?" she asked aloud.

Doctor: Why did you shoot at her then?!

The voice spoke back to her, "No. I am speaking with Rarity right now.

Doctor: (Luna) She’s totally here right now. Just continue on murderin....we mean defeating your friends in this completely harmless, not lethal in any way game.

She can use her mind at any time to respawn again. The necklaces you are wearing have the power to reanimate your bodies again

Ditzy: How does that work?

Doctor: Let me guess. It’s magic, we don’t have to explain it.

and I will select a new place for you to respawn. I am explaining this to every player right now."

Ditzy: Why didn’t you mention this sooner!

Rainbow Dash sighed to herself a breath of relief. Just as she turned around, she was met with a grinning Applejack. She appeared to be holding a large weapon that represented something of a cannon. "Howdy partner!"

Ditzy: (Rainbow) Well...ponyfeathers.

Applejack said as she pulled the trigger and a blast of shrapnel spewed out of her weapon and tore into Rainbow Dash's body. The blast was so powerful, that it turned her body into a  bunch of little meat giblets

Doctor: Giblet refers to the entrails a bird not an equine.

that seemed to bounce around the floor. "Yee-haw! That was fun!"

Ditzy: Ripping my best friend to bloody chunks is so much fun!

Suddenly Applejack heard a strange noise that seemed to be getting louder and louder. "What in tarnations is that ruckus all about?"

Princess Celestia answered her. "Be careful, Applejack. Somepony is charging their Impact Hammer and is getting closer and closer to you.

Ditzy: You ruined the surprise!

The Impact Hammer will do at least one hundred hit points worth of damage.

Ditzy: Oh...no?

Doctor: Maybe you should tell us how many hit points they have before throwing numbers around?

You should collect some health vials or body armor to be safe."

"Aw heck! I'm a tough gal and I don't need no extra protection!

Ditzy: (Applejack) An apple could hogtie a hurricane!

I'm as rough and tough as they come and ain't no lil' Impact Hammer is gonna scare this farm girl when I got myself a Flak Cannon!

Ditzy: (Snorts) Read that as ‘Flank’ Cannon for a second there.

Doctor: Real mature.

Why I'm sure you can go..." Before Applejack could finish her sentence,  she was interrupted by a "SURPRISE!" Suddenly, Pinkie Pie had blasted through her body with her Impact Hammer. Applejack's body was split into pieces and the parts of her body were scattered all around the floor.

Doctor: Well, that was predictable.

Pinkie Pie was covered in blood and gore.

All: Ugh.

Doctor: Is this really necessary?

Ditzy: Why weren’t they warned about this?!

She put down the Impact Hammer and ran her front hooves down her face. She looked at her hooves and they were now covered in blood and the bits from Applejack's body. Pinkie Pie started giggling madly at the bloody mess that she made of her friend.  

Doctor: I don’t think Pinkie even knows what she has done. She probably thinks that ketchup.

"Well done, Pinkie Pie!" the voice said.

Doctor: (Voice) Embrace the madness and carnage!

"The Impact Hammer has many uses including a power E.M.P. blast that can knock even the most mightiest power-ups off an opponent and you can grab them for yourself.

Ditzy: Ha! That leaf powerup won’t save you now Mario!

Do keep in mind that it's not very logical to only use the Impact Hammer as a primary weapon. As the players adapt and get used to what the weapons do and how things work, you will be at a disadvantage in the long run because this weapon is strictly melee based and all the other players can hear you from a distance. I recommend using it more for arena mobility. Thankfully there are no real uses for the Impact Hammer when it comes to mobility for this arena, but there are many other areas of different arenas that you can gain easier access to thanks to the Impact Hammer."

Ditzy: You can’t even go to the bathroom in GM-KPony-4EVAR-LOL-Temple-of-Dangerous-Things v.1.10.12 without it.

Pinkie Pie frowned and replied, "But I love this weapon! I want a weapon that fires fast, at blistering speeds! What other weapon do you think I would like, Princess?"

"Look near where Applejack's corpse is. This weapon is called the Stinger.

Doctor: It shoots bees.

Ditzy: Bees? Dear Celestia!

It fires bullets almost at the same speeds as when you talk.

All: Wow.

When you fire it, at first it may not seem as fast, but it will pick up speed shortly as you hold the trigger down. It also has a powerful secondary fire that can be very disruptive to your friends when they are attempting to line up shots against you. It fires out these powerful nail-like shards that knocks your opponents back with force. You can practically crucify your opponents to the walls with a few well placed shots!"

Doctor: Passion of the Applejack.

Pinkie Pie giggled at the idea

Doctor: (Pinkie) The Romans sure knew how to have a good time!

and walked over to the Stinger. She quickly took it out and  grinned. It was time to have some more fun!

Rarity respawned

Ditzy: So, does this mean they’re clones now?

Doctor: I suppose so consider their original bodies died...I think.

and she found her hoof was stuck inside the corpse of one of her dear friends. She couldn't even tell who it was because the body was so damaged and burned beyond recognition.

Ditzy: Okay, I can understand fighting with scifi weapons in real life is cool and everything. But, seeing disfigured ponies doesn’t sound fun at all! The first time I saw a pony die, I threw up, and he was just stabbed! Why can’t they just disappear when they die? It’s less scarring.

Doctor: I guess this is the logical conclusion to video games desensitizing violence.

She puffed her cheeks out as if she were trying to hold back the temptation to vomit at the sight she saw.

Ditzy: See! What did I tell you!? And this was one of her friends too...

She hoped the foul smell of the burnt corpse would not enter and offend her nostrils.

Ditzy: And it smells like real carnage too? Why would anypony want to play this?

Doctor: (Shakes head) Life isn’t like a video game.

"Ew! Ew! Ew!" Rarity shrieked, as she took her hoof out from the gory mess. "Why would you have me spawn here where I'm standing on top of a corpse?!"

Ditzy: (Celestia) This is for going after my nephew's money and title!

As the corpse began to magically disappear,

Doctor: Leaving the refreshing smell of pine.

Princess Celestia spoke to her, "Sorry about that.

Ditzy: (Celestia) But it was good for a laugh.

I felt this place was the most appropriate spot right now because there are too many other battles going on around the arena and you have a better chance here to find a weapon and defend yourself."

Doctor: And you couldn’t spawn her a few meters to the left out of the gore because….

Suddenly a loud explosion was heard from above. Rarity suddenly felt what seemed like a rain storm of body parts and a blood shower upon her body.

Doctor: It won’t surprise me if Twilight and her friends ended up with PTSD after all of this.

"Ew! This is disgusting! I cannot go into battle with a messy mane or coat that is covered in blood! I need to feel pretty! Please let me at least find a comb in this arena!"

Doctor: (Rarity) Blood and gore is one thing, but no combs or brushes? Utter barbarians!

Princess Celestia spoke again, "You don't have to get too messy if you don't want to.

Doctor: That seems a little hard when every weapon in the game causes an unnecessary amount of gore.

If you're also worried about appearance, there are health vials, health packs, body armor, and the most important power up of all, the Shield Belt.

Ditzy: (Rarity) ...Darling have you listened to a word I’ve said.

These will greatly increase your hit points be it health, body armor, or shield. You will practically shine once you pick these items up.

Doctor: (Celestia) Metaphorically of course, you will still smell just as rancid as before.

I think I have the perfect weapon in mind for you since you are the pony who has the 'eye' for things and pays attention to even the smallest of details going on. Hurry on over to the nearest jump pad. It will take you up to a spot that has a special weapon that will fit your needs exactly."

Doctor: It’s nice you’re giving them pointers and everything, but wouldn’t it better to let them learn how to play the game for themselves.

Ditzy: Celestia is like that back seat gamer that won’t shut up.

Rarity saw in the distance a ramp that led up to the jump pad. She hurried on over and walked over the pad. The pad activated and sent her flying on top of the platform. There she saw the Sniper Rifle. She walked over to it and brought it out from her inventory list. Rarity held the gun in one hoof and flicked at her mane with her other hoof in an attempt to flick the blood and gore out of her mane and to feel pretty once again.

All: I feel pretty,

Oh, so pretty,

I feel pretty and witty and bright!

She put her eye to the scope and began to take aim. She saw Twilight Sparkle in the distance trotting over to find a weapon. BANG! Rarity had fired a shot but missed.

Doctor: It ricocheted off a wall and hit Rainbow Dash instead.

This time she decided not to use the scope

Doctor: (Luna) Rarity, you’re not using your scope. What’s wrong?

Ditzy: (Rarity) Nothing darling. I'm all right.

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and tried her best.

BANG! She fired another shot and it took her friend's head off instantly.

Doctor: The force is strong with this one.

"HEAD SHOT!" Princess Luna called out.

Ditzy: I wonder what talking in red text sounds like.

Doctor: Loud and gravelly?

Rarity saw the kill award in bold red letters in her vision.

Princess Celstia began to speak to Rarity, "A clean and honorable kill, Rarity!

Ditzy: I thought honor meant not attacking ponies from behind.

Well done! It looks like this will be your main weapon of choice! You now have the option to get kills without having to worry too much about getting covered in a gore fest."

Ditzy: What was wrong with them just turning into a skeleton and dying?

Twilight Sparkle respawned. She was getting frustrated that Applejack seemed to be dominating this game ever since she found the Flak Cannon.

Ditzy: There’s always that one player.

Twilight Sparkle consciously went through the scoreboard. "Applejack is a head by fifteen kills right now and I don't even have one!

Ditzy: You did your best and worked as hard as you could.

Doctor: That’s hardly comforting.

I can't keep up with Rainbow Dash and Applejack's competitiveness. I just wish there was some kind of weapon that could give me an advantage and use some kind of strategy to out smart my opponents!

Doctor: (Twilight) Why can’t the game win itself for me!

I am a thinking and planning kind of pony! I'm not as fast as Rainbow Dash or Applejack when it comes to their reflexes!

Ditzy: Maybe if you exercised and dieted like Spike has been pressing you to do.

Oh, please help me, Princess!"

"I understand your troubles

Doctor: (Celestia) But I’m not going to help you. I don’t play favorites.

and I have spawned you next to a weapon that I feel will suit your needs," the voice said.

Twilight Sparkle walked over to the weapon and then took it out of her inventory. "The Shock Rifle?" she asked.

Doctor: (Celestia) It tickles them with electricity.

"I might as well give it a shot." Twilight began to roam the arena looking for somepony to shoot. She stumbled upon Pinkie Pie who was bouncing off the walls that were now splattered with blood like a mad filly. Twilight took aim and fired a few shots with the primary fire. She couldn't even land one.

Ditzy: (Twilight) Pinkie Pie is so hax.

Pinkie Pie turned around and began firing a spew of bullets that came out of her weapon. Upon being hit a few times, Twilight began to panic and switched to the alternative fire. She wasn't even trying to aim carefully, she just held down the trigger and a blast of powerful pulse-like balls began to shoot out. She connected a few hits with Pinkie Pie, but Pinkie Pie's mobility was next to flawless. No pony in the game had the same speed and mobility as Pinkie Pie did, and she had already mastered the wall dodge in the game.

Doctor: (Celestia) Wait, how do you know about that? I never told you about it.

Ditzy: (Pinkie) I read the manual silly.

Doctor: (Celestia) What?

Twilight Sparkle began to back her flank up to the wall in an attempt to get away.

Ditzy: (Twilight) Maybe I try hard enough, I can go through this wall.

Pinkie Pie switched her Stinger to the alternative fire and she connected a fatal shot to Twilight. The shot pierced through her throat and the force of the shot sent her flying back against the wall. She was pinned against the wall and her body was swaying slightly in the air.

Doctor: Don’t feel bad Twilight. Your body could double as a pinata.

Frustrated at another failed attempt to get a frag, Twilight consciously wished to respawn and she did again. The Princess spawned her at the exact same spot as before.

Doctor: (Pinkie) Oh hey Twilight!

Ditzy: (Twilight) Oh p…….

Twilight Sparkle became even more frustrated and cried out,

Doctor: She starting a temper tantrum.

"I have tried every weapon in this arena and I can't get one single kill!

Ditzy: (Twilight) Even Fluttershy kicks my flank to the curb.

I was even doing better with other weapons. Why would you respawn me here again!?"

The voice answered her, "Twilight, you are not thinking. You have not learned that you can use the primary fire to connect a shot to the secondary fire and thus resulting in a huge area of effect explosion that does incredible amounts of damge!"

Doctor: It destroyed the second ‘a’ in the last word!

Twilight Sparkle picked the weapon back up and fired the alternative fire. She then shot the primary fire at the alternative fire and the result was a colorfully huge explosion.

Ditzy: That accidently killed her.

"That was awesome! That explosion reminds me of a sonic rainboom!" she said.

Doctor: Rainbow Dash later sued for copyright.

"If I can properly predict where my opponent is moving before they actually do move, then I'm sure I can be successful with this weapon!"

Ditzy: (Twilight) Oh, who am I kidding? I suck at this game.

Twilight Sparkle hopped off of the ledge and ventured down to where the Flak Cannon

Ditzy: You really need to think up a better name. It’s really hard not to snicker at it.

spawn point is. She was hoping that she could find Applejack lurking somewhere around the Flak Cannon. Sure enough, Applejack eventually came back looking to pick up some more ammo for her Flak Cannon. Twilight Sparkle made some mental notes in her head

Doctor: (Twilight) Wait, did remember to buy milk today? I will ask Spike to pick some up later.

and fired the alternative fire. She licked her lips in anticipation as the giant pulsing ball headed towards her friend. Once the ball reached a certain proximity she blasted it with the primary fire and the result was epic. Applejack was instantly killed and the bits and pieces of her body flew across the arena. Twilight Sparkle put down her gun and clapped her hooves with excitement. She went through the score board and saw that Princess Celestia added a kill point to her score board. "Oh! This is so wonderful I got my first frag and now I'm officially on my way to catching up to my friends.

Ditzy: Only fifty more points to go!

I bet if I practice with this weapon more, then I might have a chance of winning too! I should also practice connecting my shock combo shots as I'm moving to avoid being hit by other players."

BANG! a loud shot rang out from Rarity's rifle.

Doctor: You asked for that Twilight.

Rainbow Dash had lost her head again.....literally.

Ditzy: Get the duct tape and gorilla glue.

Rainbow Dash respawned and checked the scoreboard. Applejack was still miles ahead of everypony else and now that egg head Twilight was starting to pick up some kills too. Rainbow Dash began to complain out loud. "This game is lame, Princess Celestia!

All: No arguments here.

You know I can't stand losing and none of these weapons are getting me anywhere. I need the absolute best of the best!"

Doctor: (Celestia) Do you want me to play the game for you? Figure it out yourself!

"I have been watching you carefully," the voice said. "I have spawned you at what is considered the tier one weapon in the game.

Doctor: Way to be a neutral moderator Celestia.

I'd like to introduce you to the Rocket Launcher. Even though all of the weapons are as best balanced as they can be in the game, the Rocket Launcher

Ditzy: (Celestia) Was designed saying “Buck balance and fairness!”.

is an incredibly powerful weapon and a fan favorite amongst many other competitors in the tournament leagues.

Ditzy: Cause splosions. 

It has multiple modes of firing and you can custom fire the way you want your rockets or rocket grenades to come out. You can fire up to three rockets or rocket grenades, at once. You have a certain timing window, when you can fire the rockets or the rockets will fire by themselves, even if you don't take your hoof off of the trigger when loading up to three rockets to fire. When loading multiple rockets to fire, opponents will hear you in the distance just like any other weapon that has a charge-like ability. If you hover your reticules

Ditzy: A what?

Doctor: Her sight.

Ditzy: Oh.

over an opponent for a long enough time, it's also possible to lock on an opponents body with missiles that will track and hone in on your opponent. They can often be easily dodged though in most cases.

Ditzy: That is a terrible homing feature. You might as well just aim normally!

With enough skill, you can also air juggle your opponents and connect rockets mid air. It's one of the most rewarding and satisfying feelings in the game."

Rainbow Dash quickly walked over to the Rocket Launcher. She had only one thing in mind.

Ditzy: Paying back Thunderlane for standing her up.

To give Applejack some pay back for her abusive Flak Cannon skills. Rainbow Dash saw Applejack running along the edge of a platform fighting against Rarity. Rarity was on the lower ground doing her best to avoid the barrage of Flak Cannon balls

Ditzy: And this isn’t intentional?

while trying to take Applejack down with the Sniper Rifle. Applejack eventually landed a flak ball that connected with Rarity's face resulting in an instant and glorifying kill for Applejack. "How's that for a facial makeover, or more like an entire body makeover, Rarity?"

Ditzy: (Rarity) You could at least have the decency not to shot a lady in the face!

Applejack said to herself with a grin as she looked at Rarity's scattered body parts.

Ditzy: They formed the shape of a bunny rabbit.

Rainbow Dash began to hold the secondary fire down as she charged up three rockets to fire at once. She peeked her head out from the corner and called out, "Hey A.J., I heard you don't even need to aim with that thing. You are nothing but a spammer! Why don't you come off that ledge and do some battle with me?"

Applejack, being a little bit too confident, stepped down off the platform.

Rainbow Dash quickly leapt out from behind the corner with grace and agility. She fired all three rockets at the hooves of Applejack.

Doctor: Who’s the spammer here?

Applejack was sent flying into the air. The blast didn't kill her because she had collected enough health power ups and body armor to stay alive. Applejack tried to rain down some flak with the primary fire from the air. Some of the flak bounced off of the ground and hit Rainbow Dash. Other pieces of the hot glowing shrapnel scattered across the floor and then ricocheted off of a nearby wall.

Rainbow Dash patiently waited for the right moment and fired a single rocket into the air. She refused to even blink as the rocket came closer and closer to Applejack. The anticipation was killing her. BAM! The rocket connected mid air with Applejack's body before she was even able to hit the ground. Rainbow Dash squealed with delight as the body parts and blood of her friend rained down from the sky and covered her body.

Doctor: Tomorrow skies will be partly cloudy with 20% chance of Applejack.

Applejack's scattered body parts were smoking and parts of her body were on fire. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! BEST WEAPON EVER!" Rainbow Dash squealed.

Ditzy: Until she was sniped by Rarity.

A great deal of time had gone by and Fluttershy had been cowering in the corner with her hooves covering her ears and her eyes were shut tightly. Everypony who ran by Fluttershy had refused to frag her because they knew that she was extra sensitive and that it might hurt her feelings if she died in the game.

Doctor: Poor thing.

The voice spoke to Fluttershy. "Fluttershy, you need to play."

Ditzy: (Voice) Kill everypony Fluttershy. Kill them all!

Fluttershy's eye's suddenly opened wide and she replied, "Oh, but I just can't hurt my friends! I love them all and I just don't like the violence that I am hearing. It would scare my animal critter friends if they ever heard it. I don't want to play and you can't make me."

Ditzy: (Celestia) Even if we offered you a position as the Royal Veterinarian?

Doctor: (Fluttershy) Um….well..

The voice spoke up again, "Fluttershy, what if I told you that Princess Luna and I are

Doctor: (Celestia) Holding Angel hostage.

the administrators of this game and that it would displease us greatly if you refused to participate in this tournament. We also have the power to permanently ban you to the Everfree forest.

Ditzy: (Fluttershy) That doesn’t sound so bad. Zecora would take me in and would be a very nice roommate.'

Not that we would, but we're just reminding you that we could.

Ditzy: If this was the Doctor, he would just firmly plant his hooves in the ground and refuse to even move for the entire game.

Doctor: (Nods)

There is a weapon near by called the Bio Rifle. We both agree that you would enjoy it because you like nature and well, the ammo has a rather unique effect on living organisms."

Doctor: (Celestia) It turns them into penguins curiously.

Fluttershy gulped at the thought of being banished to the Everfree forest and slowly stood on her hooves again.

Ditzy: It’s absolutely detestable that your are bullying poor Fluttershy into this.

She bowed her head shamefully as she walked cautiously over to where the weapon was and walked over to it. She wanted to please the Princesses and make them happy.

Ditzy: Buck you Princess Celestia! Er, story Princess Celestia I mean...

She went through her item slots and brought it out.

"Now this weapon is most useful in its secondary fire mode upon firing the first shot," the voice said. All you have to do is hold down the trigger of the alternative fire and charge up your rifle. Once it reaches full charge, you are free to hold it as long as you want,

Doctor: (Fluttershy hopeful) For the rest of the game?

Ditzy: (Luna) No.

until you are ready to let go of the trigger and fire away. It will send a large blob of toxic goo

Ditzy: At least it isn’t a weapon that splatters blood everywhere.

Doctor: Spares Fluttershy doing that to her friends at least.

that will land on the ground and smaller areas of the goo will break off and land around the area. Do be careful not to step in the goo after you fire it; it will kill you. We can't even recall the exact number of times Derpy Hooves had walked into her own land mine of goo and killed herself.

Ditzy: Grr. Stupid poor depth perception.

The neat thing about this weapon is that it will deal at least two hundred five points of damage if you connect a fully charged shot.

Ditzy: Wow, that’s twice as strong as the Impact Hammer! ...I still have no idea what the max HP is.

It's a great weapon to have when you need to make a comeback against somepony who is in control of the arena and has collected too many health points, or armor power ups.

Doctor: Good way to balance the game I guess.

It's also an effective weapon for getting rid of somepony who has collected the Shield Belt or the Big Keg O' Health.

Ditzy: Cool! Whatever that means.

Doctor: Now you're not explaining everything?

Do keep in mind that while this weapon may not be nearly as loud as the Impact Hammer in its charging mode, ponies will still be able to hear you from a distance when you have your Bio Rifle charged up in its secondary firing mode."

Ditzy: This game has like no stealth. You can’t really do anything without attracting attention.

Doctor: Perfect if you like being loud and breaking things.

Fluttershy gulped again and took a deep breath.

Ditzy: (Fluttershy) Okay Fluttershy you can do this! Just pull the trigger and send one of your best, most dearest friends to a horrible and…. (Sobs) I can’t do it! Just banish me already and get it over with already!

She squeezed the trigger with her hoof gently and held it down. A strange sound came out of the weapon as the Bio Rifle began to charge up.

All: (Sound) Ooga-chaka ooga-ooga! Ooga-chaka ooga-ooga!

She waited patiently for somepony to come by as she nervously hid behind a veil of her own pink mane. Fluttershy heard hoof steps coming and she braced herself. The tension was building up inside of her and she puffed her cheeks out as she held her breath. Could she do it? Could the sweetest, most caring, and loving pony in all of Equestria really kill one of her best friends?

Doctor: Is this such a good idea? She’s never been the most stable pony I’ve ever seen.

As the pony made her way around the corner, Fluttershy closed her eyes tightly and let go of the trigger. The blast of green goo shot out of her rifle. The goo connected and clung to the body of the victim. Within seconds the victim was dead.

Doctor: Hey! At least there isn’t ridiculously over the top violence this time.

Fluttershy, refusing to open her eyes asked aloud, "Did I do it? Did I murder my friend?"

Ditzy: (Luna) We were just checking...gah….

The voice replied to her, "If you don't want to open your eyes and see for yourself you can consciously open the scoreboard with your mind and see if you were rewarded with a frag point or not."

Ditzy: (Luna) You will not escape what you have done.

Fluttershy gulped again and opened the score board.

Doctor: (Fluttershy) Negative 1?

There she saw that she now had her first official frag.

Doctor: (Pinkie) This calls for a…

Ditzy: (Luna) No parties! Thee shall commence with the killing and that is it!

Fluttershy opened her eyes and saw the carnage that lay before her.

Doctor: Half of the arena was gone.

She bowed her head down with guilt. Suddenly, she felt a hoof tap her on the back of her shoulder. She slowly turned around to see Pinkie Pie grinning from ear to ear. She was also covered in blood and gore.

Doctor: Again. Is it really necessary for the game to have this?

"Oh, I guess you're going to kill me now because I'm a bad pony and murdered one of our friends. Go ahead and just get it over with please," Fluttershy said in a depressing tone as she turned her head away.

Doctor: Poor poor Fluttershy.

Ditzy: What kind of sicko would put her through this?

Pinkie Pie put down her weapon and embraced her friend with a great big hug. "No way, Fluttershy! At least not at this moment, I just came over to congratulate you on such an awesome frag!

Doctor: See Fluttershy, murder is not so bad.

I saw the whole thing happen! You blasted Twilight Sparkle and killed her before she even knew what happened! Great shot!"

Doctor: Somehow I knew it would be her.

Ditzy: She’s like the most unlucky pony I have ever seen.

"Oh," Fluttershy replied. "So you don't hate me? You're really not going to kill me for that?"

Suddenly out of no where, Rainbow Dash had used the lift jump tactic and she propelled herself high into the air. She had three rockets charged up. Right before she fired them,

Doctor: She crashed into the floor and blew herself up.

she called down to the two ponies who were huddled in the corner, "Pinkie Pie may not want to kill you now, but I don't mind doing it for her!" The rockets landed on top of the ponies and they were both instantly killed.

Ditzy: What a jerk!

Within an instant, a deep booming voice that could only have been Princess Luna, glorified Rainbow Dash

All:Glorified?!

and cried out "DOUBLE KILL!"

Rainbow Dash began to roll around on the floor giggling to herself.

Doctor: Yeah, real funny.

Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy had both respawned fairly close to each other. They both saw Rainbow Dash rolling around on the floor while cracking up with laughter.

Ditzy: And shot her to pieces.

Pinkie Pie called out over to Rainbow Dash from across the arena, "Hey! That wasn't fair! We were talking and you know that Fluttershy is a sensitive pony. You should say your sorry to Fluttershy!"

Rainbow Dash ignored her friend's request and continued to laugh.

Ditzy: Yeah, that totally sounds like Rainbow Dash.

Fluttershy looked over to Pinkie Pie and said, "Oh, that's ok. I don't mind."

Pinkie Pie scratched her head with her hoof and asked, "So you're not upset that Rainbow Dash was being cheap and mean?"

Fluttershy straightened up a bit and gathered some confidence.

Ditzy: (Fluttershy) Actually, I’m furious! That Rainbow Dash should know better than to attack defenseless ponies! I’m in the right mind to give her a stern lecture over what she just did. In fact, that’s exactly what I am going to do right now!

She looked back over to Pinkie Pie and said, "No, but I'm not going to let her push me around like that. I'm going to find my Bio Rifle and I'll show her who is boss!"

All: Um…

Ditzy: Oh boy, not this again...

Pinkie Pie bounced over and connected her hoof with hers. "That's the spirit, Fluttershy!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed. "Don't let some silly filly boss you around like that! Kill her with kindness!"

Ditzy: This can only end in good.

Fluttershy giggled to herself as Pinkie Pie leapt off the ledge to find a new weapon. Fluttershy ventured back to the same spot where she first picked up the Bio Rifle. She had a smirk on her face as she charged up her weapon. "Come out, come out my little pretties," she whispered to herself.

All: (Back up) Oh…..kayy…..

Applejack and Rainbow Dash seemed to be butting heads together often and found themselves locked in intense and epic battles.

Doctor: But they were cut for time.

They were both competing to see who could hold first place the longest on the score board.

Even though Rainbow Dash was competing for first place on the scoreboard,

All: Naturally.

she had the most deaths out of all of the players because she was very reckless and aggressive with her play style.

Doctor: Often known for rushing into enemy fire just to get a fews shots in.

Rainbow Dash would often get so excited and full of adrenaline,

Ditzy: She made Pinkie Pie look tame and subdue.

that she would sometimes make careless mistakes and fire her rockets too close to her own body which resulted in a suicide, and the loss of a frag point. She did love the idea of taking down an opponent or even opponents before they could finish her off by firing a rocket near her own body,

Ditzy: It’s a really good thing she isn’t a real soldier then.

Doctor: Why do guns suddenly drop the intelligence of their users?

but she needed to practice and understand more when that time was appropriate for her to suicide in order to take an opponent down

Ditzy: Like when a villain is threatening a friend and the only thing you have is a forklift.

with her because sometimes she would fire her rocket near her body too soon and her opponent would survive the blast from her last resort kamikaze attacks.

Doctor: Kamikazing to win is rarely a winning strategy.

Rarity was freelancing and picking off her friends one by one with the Sniper Rifle.

Doctor: Freelancing? Is she a mercenary now?

Fluttershy had a very low death count because

Ditzy: She’s Fluttershy?

she was a very conservative player, and she gathered up enough confidence to rack up an impressive amount of kills considering how long she was idle from being too scared to play at first.

Doctor: (Fluttershy) One kill! I’m so good at this.

Twilight Sparkle was starting to rank up with kills by playing intelligently and connecting epic

Doctor: Stop throwing around epic like it actually means anything!

shock combos with her Shock Rifle, and Pinkie Pie seemed to have the least deaths out of all her friends. Nopony could seem to keep up with her random wall dodges and unpredictable movements. Pinkie Pie was a target that was incredibly hard to hit.

Doctor: Pinkie thought using her Pinkie Sense would be cheating.

Next Chapter: Episode 15 - An "Unreal" Day - Chapter 3 Estimated time remaining: 17 Hours, 12 Minutes