Finally done with this chapter. I had a bit of trouble with this one. Still, next chapter Sora and his friends show up. Really looking forward to doing that chapter. Shire Folk has an...interesting approach to their characters. I am not sure how long it will take me to finish chapter 2. It’s over 13,000 words. Why Shire Folk? Why?

If you have a fanfic recommendation, comments, or criticisms please leave a comment or PM me at my fimfiction account or my blog on Tumblr. Please NO clop or fanfiction with extreme violence. I am not going to do those. I want to do a more family friendly series and it is going to be relatively clean. Besides everyone else does them. Okay, I might do one for a special occasion. But otherwise no clop or extreme gore fics. Ok, enough rambling. On with the fic!

Special thanks to Shire Folk for letting me use his story.

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Doctor and Ditzy’s Science Theater

by Rixizu

Episode 2

It had been a very interesting week. This facility the Doctor and Ditzy were trap in was full of oddities and surprises. The walls and floor for example, they weren’t just any ordinary metal but seemed be made of some sort of living metal. At least, that is what the Doctor theorized. He called it Equsinitium. The real surprise was when the Doctor openly complained on the second day about the lack of color and the need for at least a potted plant. The next day the entire facility changed itself. Instead of plain metal walls and floor, it was replaced with pleasant light blue walls that appeared to be made out of wood with hard dark brown wooden floors with pure white baseboards. Hanging potted plants could be found throughout the facility of various types of ferns.

After recovering from the shock of this unexpected development, the Doctor and Ditzy tested to see if they could cause other changes in their environment. When the Doctor complained about the small selection of books given to them, the next day he found a newer and better library with an impressive selection of books. Soon the two found themselves with a new garden, a workroom, a better kitchen, and a pool with a Jacuzzi (Ditzy always complained about the Tardis’s pool not have one). For some reason however, it refused to give them two beds or at least another place for the Doctor to sleep.

Whatever caused this gave the Doctor all sorts of tools, parts, and equipment to work with. Unfortunately, whenever the Doctor tried to invent something that could get them out of this, vital parts of the device just vanished. No matter what he tried, it never worked. He tried making complex or deceptive designs that made it very difficult to discern how it worked or what even the vital components of the device were. And yet, still somehow they were disabled. However, the Doctor refused to give up and was currently working on something he was sure was going to work this time. The Doctor found all this rather fun. He knew it would be only a matter of time until he outsmarted the system controlling this facility. At least, he hoped he would.

The Doctor noted that their surroundings were subtlety and not so subtlety changing to better suit its prisoners. Ditzy said it was probably nanomachines. They always seemed to be behind these sort of things. The Doctor, however, suspected that it was done through interactive holograms controlled by a very advanced and clever AI.  The big question is why? Why go through so much trouble to make them so unbelievably comfortable? This was starting to make the Doctor uneasy.

The Doctor and Ditzy were currently strolling through the garden. The Doctor always liked doing this. He often spent hours in the garden of his Tardis. It helps him relax and cleared his thoughts. They had a half an hour until the next experiment began. A helpful clock appeared a day after they arrived telling how long they had until the next experiment.

The two walked together in silence. The Doctor looked lost in thought and Ditzy didn’t want to disrupt him. She rather enjoyed these walks with him even if they didn’t really say anything. She never really understood much of the things he said anyway. She marveled at the scene around them. They were surrounded by hundreds of different plants with the biggest flower beds she had ever seen. She saw sunflowers, tulips, daisies, lilies, and roses just to name a few. There were brilliant pearl white archways covered in pink roses. In the distance she even saw a little creak. The fact that all this could appear over night was astounding and the plants appeared to be real.

“Doctor.” Ditzy finally said after some time. “What sort of villain locks up his captives in paradise?”

The Doctor appeared to be considering this. “If you can even call him that.” The Doctor paused again for a moment. He walked up to a nearby tulip and ate it. “He acts like he a maniacal sinister villain and yet he gives us this.”

The Doctor gestured to their surroundings. “And then he makes us read fan fiction. I fail to see what sort of data he could get from that or what he could even use it for.”

“Maybe he wants us in prime condition before he breaks our will with each fan fic he gives us?” Ditzy guessed. “But something about Mr. X gives me the feeling that he doesn’t actually mean us any harm.”

The Doctor nodded in agreement. Mr. X didn’t give the impression that he was as mean as he was trying to act. But one big question remained, why did he trap them here? They heard a loud buzzing in the background. It seems it was time for the experiment.

“Well my little test subjects, how are you doing today?” Mr. X said when the Doctor and Ditzy entered the main room.

“Just fine.” The Doctor said simply. Ditzy nodded in agreement.

“That’s good. Today’s experiment will be the first chapter of Guardians of Magic by Shire Folk.” Mr. X then gave an evil laugh. “Enjoy”

“Wait!” The Doctor raised a hoof when he said this. “How about some questions first? Like…”

“No questions!” Mr. X interrupted him before he got a chance to ask anything. “You are my test subjects and that is all you need to know.”

The Doctor sighed. “Oh course.” He knew it wouldn’t be that easy.

“Now time for the experiment!” An alarm sounded as soon as he said this.

“Well it was worth a try.” The Doctor said wearily.

“Ready Doctor?” The Ditzy yelled since the alarm was so loud. The Doctor nodded and the two entered the theater.

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If you haven’t seen my pledge to three reviewers in the comments section below then I shall say it here.

Ditzy: You’re not partaking of food or water until you get a Tvtropes page?

If you’ve been wanting a good Kingdom Hearts/MLP crossover fic where it’s not just Heartless attack, Sora and crew come to mop up, Keyhole gets sealed, and everybody leaves happy…don’t come here.

Doctor: So many ponies are going to end up dead then?

Ditzy: I’m worried for Twilight and her friends now.

Everypony can still be happy at the end of the Equestria world and all, but I get characters off of their butts and out of their worlds to help save the damn universe and fight the bad guys.

Ditzy: So...we are going to see ponies in other worlds?

My Sora and Kairi eviscerate the concept of World Order.

Doctor: Maybe Hulk Hogan will get a keyblade and join them?

If you want them to stay in Equestria, go somewhere else. Otherwise, pack your bags, hold onto your hats and prepare for Kingdom Hearts and My Little Pony, SHIRE FOLK STYLE!

Ditzy: Do you think that is some sort of dance?

Disclaimer: I’ll take “Things I Don’t Own” for $400.

Doctor: Talent?

Ditzy: Writing skill?

What are Kingdom Hearts and My Little Pony? Captain Cloudhammer is also property of Cloudhammer.

Ditzy: Speaking of keyblades, do you think I might get one?

Doctor: A muffin shaped keyblade perhaps?

Ditzy: A muffin...what? That’s ridiculous! Why would I...

Doctor: Well...it’s just that...

Ditzy: Doctor, I’m not obsessed with muffins.

Doctor: Really? You eat them everyday.

Ditzy: I just happen to like muffins a lot. That’s all.

Doctor: Fine. Besides, if anyone is going to get a keyblade, it’s Twilight.

Ditzy: Come on, that’s way too predictable!

-G-M-

Chapter 1: An Average and Abnormal Morning

Ditzy: A.K.A. Every day of my life!

Ponyville woke sleepily in the sun’s morning rays as it always did. The light washed the town in its warm glow, reflecting brightly off the walls of the inhabitants’ homes

All: AHHH! MY EYES!

and filtering golden light through the many hay-thatched roofs. Robins, jays, chickadees,

Doctor: Cockatrices

Ditzy: Griffons

and other birds sang their songs in the dawn’s light, greeting those waking ponies with their morning music.

Ditzy: Dubtrot

        One such pony, a young unicorn mare with a pale mulberry coat and purple mane with a pink highlight running through it, rubbed sleep from her eyes with her hooves as she sat up in her bed. She yawned loudly, stretching out her forelegs, and turned to look out the open doors to one of the balconies in her home.

Doctor: Soon all below her would be her’s.

The sun’s warming rays greeted Twilight Sparkle

Ditzy: Wait a second. Twilight is lavender, not mulberry!

Doctor: Maybe she’s a different color in this universe?

 with a touch she always felt was semi-personal.

All: …

Doctor: (Officer) Please show us on the doll where the sunlight touched you.

It was Princess Celestia who raised and set the sun every morning and evening,

Ditzy: Luna on the weekends. Celestia liked to go camping.

and Twilight Sparkle always took personal pride in being the Sun Princess’ hoof-chosen apprentice. Every morning it felt as if Princess Celestia were raising the sun just for her, her star pupil, even though Twilight knew that it was one of her royal duties and it was for all little ponies.

Doctor: Twilight quickly grew resentful of that fact.

        Twilight threw the covers off of her bed and got onto her hooves so that she could stride out onto the balcony and soak in the sunlight.

Ditzy: Which turned her lavender.

The leaves that grew from the branches of her home—a library on the inside of a hollow, yet still very much alive, tree—

Doctor: I really need to ask Twilight about that when we get out here.

rustled slightly in a breeze and shone like emeralds with their dew still clinging to them. Twilight sighed and smiled, turning around again to return to the inside of the second floor loft she and Spike shared as their bedroom in the library.

        The lavender unicorn

Ditzy: Now she’s lavender?

Doctor: *shugs*

laughed quietly under her breath as she looked down at Spike’s sleeping form.

Ditzy: Twilight drew all over his face with permanent marker last night.

The baby dragon was still in a deep sleep under his blankets, and Peewee, the phoenix hatchling, was snuggled up against his lilac-scaled cheek close to his rounded green spines. She considered waking up her number one assistant, but thought better of it.

Ditzy: It was a far too precious moment to disturb.

He and Peewee had been up late playing last night; and Spike even later scrubbing the soot off the floor when Peewee accidentally enveloped himself in fire.

Doctor: Twilight kept a note on her mental checklist to fireproof the library later.

        “I’ll let them sleep a bit longer,” Twilight whispered to herself, trotting towards the stairs. She had thought that she had it bad when Spike hatched for her after she’d unleashed a strong surge of raw magic when she was just a little filly

Doctor: She regretted the day Celestia put him in her care.

Ditzy: That’s a mean thing to say about Spike!

Doctor: You don’t have to take it personally.

being tested to enter Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns, but Spike was just a baby dragon taking care of a baby phoenix!

Doctor: It was like the blind leading the blind.

Twilight had accidentally turned her parents into potted plants in her uncontrolled burst of magic and grown Spike from hatchling straight to a hundred-hoof tall dragon!

Doctor: I think that piece of exposition should have happened a few lines ago.

It was that event, though, that had sparked the Princess’ interest in her, and being made Celestia’s personal protégé as well as her cutie mark of a sparkling pink and purple star appearing on her flank was still one of her happiest memories;

Ditzy: (Celestia) All too easy. I have the perfect pawn..er.. I mean pony to save Luna.

and she was sure that Spike would remember standing up to that gang of teenage dragons during the Great Dragon Migration in order to protect Peewee’s egg for the rest of his, hopefully, very long life.

Doctor: Spike later that day died in a tragic...

Ditzy: No Doctor, we aren’t making those kinds of jokes!

Doctor: What? Why?

Ditzy: I mean it!

Doctor: Ok....

        She was in the middle of making haycakes, levitating a spatula in a magenta cloud, when she heard Spike’s footsteps on the floorboards above her. Peewee was chirping and Spike was talking, but Twilight couldn’t quite make out the words

Doctor: Something about burning and a fire.

until he called loudly through the house for her. She couldn’t help but laugh a little. “I’m in the kitchen Spike,” she shouted in reply, simultaneously flipping the cakes

Ditzy: Into her face when she got distracted by Spike.

in the frying pan. Twenty seconds later the baby dragon entered the room with Peewee flying close to his shoulder. Twilight and her friend Fluttershy were still amazed by the baby phoenix. At a mere two weeks old the little bird’s wings were already strong enough to let it fly. The phoenix hatchling settled itself down on a perch they’d gotten for him.

Doctor: Out of a bin.

        “Aw, why didn’t you wake me Twilight?” Spike asked while the unicorn grabbed the haycakes with her magic. “You know that cooking is one of my chores.”

Ditzy: (Spike) Besides, you cook as well as you dance.

        Twilight giggled at the annoyed look on his face. “I know that Spike,” she answered, setting the haycakes down on two plates she’d also picked up before setting them down on the table. “But you’ve been so busy with Peewee lately that I thought I’d let you sleep in a little.

Ditzy: (Spike) Alright Twilight, what’s the catch?

Doctor: (Twilight) What do you mean?

Ditzy: (Spike) You never do things like this. You want something!

Besides, you both looked so cute that Princess Celestia would make it a crime to wake you.”

Ditzy: (Spike) You like watching me sleep? That’s really creepy Twilight!

        “Now Twilight,” Spike argued even as he filled Peewee’s bowls with water and lily petals with grasshopper legs,

Ditzy: Not actual whole grasshoppers?

“how am I supposed to be your number one assistant if you won’t let me do my job?”

Doctor: (Spike) I like the unnecessary workload you push on me.

        “Oh Spike,” Twilight countered patiently, pulling her chair back with more magic from her glowing horn, “you’re still my number one assistant, but you have more chores than just cleaning, cooking, organizing the library, and helping in my studies and research now;

Doctor: How can Spike deal with all that?

Ditzy: He’s a very responsible dragon.

you have Peewee to take care of, and that’s a big responsibility.”

Doctor: (Twilight) Remember what happened to Mr. Limpit.

        “It’s okay Twilight, I can handle it.” Spike ran one of his claws down Peewee’s head, getting a pleased croon out of the phoenix before the magical bird dug into its breakfast.

        “Even so,” Twilight said kindly, “I want to give you a helping hoof whenever I can too Spike.

Doctor: (deadpan) How generous of you. Now he’s only slight less swamped with work.

We’re family; and Owloycious too.” As if hearing his name, there came a faint “hoo” from outside in the tree’s canopy. Twilight couldn’t help but giggle a little and Spike sat down at the table across from Twilight.

        “But I’m still your number one assistant, right?”

        “Don’t worry Spike,” Twilight assured him, “nopony could ever take your place there.”

Doctor:(Twilight) An owl on the other hoof...

Spike picked up a fork with a smile on his face.

        “Then all is right with the world,” he said, sticking the fork into a haycake.

All: (groans)

Ditzy: Why do they keep doing this?

-G-M-

Doctor: Now hopefully we can get to the story after all that horrible, trivial, and awkward exposition about why Spike has a pet Phoenix.

        Princess Celestia’s hooves descended with purpose onto the lawns of the Canterlot Castle gardens,

Doctor: She was going to get the last piece of cake no matter what.

her younger sister just behind her. Luna was tired after the previous night’s events, but she refused to acknowledge it and get some sleep until the two alicorns had come up with some sort of explanation for what had occurred.

Ditzy: Luna went without sleep for several months.

        “They just disappeared?” Celestia asked.

        “Yes,” Luna answered, watching as a white Pegasus Guard flew overhead. The Royal Guards had run into ten other creatures in the city, and had dispatched them without much difficulty,

Doctor: (Luna) Though mysteriously fourteen of these foul creatures ended up vanquished that day.

but all of the ponies who had encountered them reported that the creatures did unnerve them to some degree.  

Ditzy: Which is why they should be murdered on site!

Doctor: (groans) That’s like assuming all shifty eyed people are killers!

“Instead of leaving a body behind or some type of substance, they just turned into wisps of smoke and faded away. I cast a detection spell in the area after I’d seen to two of the students, but they hadn’t left any trace of their presence in the area that my magic could detect. Celestia, it doesn’t make any sense.”

Doctor: Maybe you waited too long when you scanned the area?

Ditzy: Non magical creatures?

        Princess Celestia frowned as she continued on towards the sculpture garden. “No, it doesn’t make sense, and that’s what I’m afraid of.” Luna looked around, recognized where they were going, and issued a slight gasp.

        “You don’t think?”

Doctor: (Luna) You don’t think it’s Him do you?

Ditzy: (Celestia) I’m afraid so.

Doctor: (Luna) Him... We will get all the jello we can!.

Ditzy: (Celestia) I don’t think you are thinking of the same pony.

        “I sincerely hope not, dear sister,” Celestia told her anxiously. “Discord should still be locked away since the Elements of Harmony imprisoned him once again, but I’m not taking any chances. If this is somehow Discord’s work, we need to make sure so that we can act accordingly.”

Doctor: I doubt it. It doesn’t sound like his style.

Ditzy: Not enough boxing penguins.

        “But what if it is?” Luna asked worriedly. “We’d imprisoned Discord for nearly three and a half thousand years before he broke out five months ago. If the seal the Elements placed on him has already weakened…Twilight Sparkle and her friends worked so hard to return harmony to Equestria.”

Ditzy: (Luna) They put in overtime and everything!

        “I know Luna,” Celestia sighed, stopping and looking up at one particular marble statue on a pedestal. It was of a creature few had ever seen the like of before.

Doctor: (coughs)

A mad scientist’s experiments at cross-breeding could hardly create a stranger creature, or a child’s imagination for that matter.

Doctor: You clearly haven’t met the same mad scientists I have.

A bipedal winged animal that was a cross between pony, dragon, bat, ram, deer, and gryphon just to name a few of its odd limbs. Chaotic was the closest possible definition of the creature, and Celestia and Luna both feared it. “However, I cannot think of another explanation.

Ditzy: Creatures created through dark magic? I remember seeing something similar before.

Doctor: Maybe creatures actually made from shadows?

If something has happened to Discord’s seal, we must know and assemble the Elements of Harmony at once.”

        Her horn glowed with soft pink light as the Sun Princess cast a powerful detection spell. The same glow enveloped the stone Discord had been turned into, and Celestia probed every aspect of it.

Ditzy: Making Discord really really uncomfortable.

Tiny fluctuations appeared in the light as the princess turned her attention towards one spot and then another, or changed the definition of her detection spell and searched for different methods the spirit of chaos and disharmony could have used to circumvent the spell that kept him imprisoned.

Ditzy: Which gave Discord plenty ideas how he could escape.

He’d been able to escape once after the Elements of Harmony had changed hooves from the princesses to Celestia’s pupil

Doctor: That and the spell weakened sufficiently when Luna was separated from the Elements of Harmony. It was only a matter of time really.

and her five friends just because nearby ponies got into a heated argument;

Ditzy: The “Free Cutie Marks” sign over him didn’t help.

surely he’d had plenty of time to examine his prison and come up with ways to attempt to break free in his thousands of years imprisoned.

        Finally, though, Celestia lowered her horn and ceased the casting of her spell. “Celly?” Luna asked cautiously.

Ditzy: Celestia was a ticking time bomb waiting to go off.

It was a sign of how close the two alicorns really were to one another when the older sibling dropped onto her knees and gave her junior a defeated look. Celestia would never appear so distraught or weak in front of anypony else.

Doctor: Which is really out of character considering that the situation isn’t all that serious yet and this Celestia we are talking about.

        “The seal is perfect,” she said, shaking her head. “Discord is not responsible for the appearance of these creatures, and I can think of no other explanation for them to even exist.”

All: (groans) Really!?

Doctor: So much for her thousands of years of experience.

        Luna placed her muzzle against her sister’s white cheek. The last time she had seen the white alicorn so emotional was when the two had reunited after the Elements had set her free from being Nightmare Moon. “Celly, I’m worried too,” she said, “but I do not believe we have the time or luxury to be as lost as we are now.

Doctor: (raising an eyebrow) May I ask why?

We may not have the answers, but we do know what we must do, don’t we?”

Ditzy: (Luna) I’ll get the Ouiji board.

        Princess Celestia inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly. She opened her eyes, her multi-hued mane flowing in a non-existent breeze as it always did. “Thank you, Luna. You’re right. We may not know what these creatures are or where they come from, but they are posing a very real danger to the ponies of Equestria.”

Ditzy: Who know how many more ponies might get scratched by them!

She stood up and extended her wings. The larger alicorn turned her head and gave her younger sister a faint smile. “Come, Luna. We must mobilize the guard.” Princess Luna nodded her head, and the two royal alicorns took off.

Doctor: (Announcer) And they’re off! Luna seems to be taking lead but Celestia isn’t far behind.

-G-M-

        In just under an hour, the most prominent officers of the Pegasus Royal Guards and Unicorn Royal Guards (collectively forming the entirety of the corps) had assembled in the audience chamber of Canterlot Castle, giving a large table that had been brought in a noticeable berth.

Doctor: It already took the lives of three guards!

With them stood three unicorns who were not wearing the brightly polished golden armour of the Royal Guards. Two of them were Starshine and Moondancer, each with bandages on their bodies where they’d been scratched by the creatures the previous night,

Ditzy: Moondancer’s serious and seemly life threatening injuries last chapter were a bit of an exaggeration.

and the third was a weathered unicorn with a mauve coat and sharp green eyes. His mane was short and white, and growing from his chin hung a snowy beard, but his tail was long and swept almost to the ground; a golden stripe ran through the left side of his tail. On the unicorn’s flank was his cutie mark, that of a wide, upwards-pointing golden crescent with a golden circle in the space between the two points. He was the headpony of Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns,

Doctor: So it isn’t Spell Nexus?

and the leader of the most powerful unicorn spell-users in Equestria. Some even said that he was as strong in magic as the legendary Star Swirl the Bearded or Marelin.

Doctor: Who, for the hundredth time, is not me nor will be.

Ditzy: Don’t you mean Merlin?

Both students who were close to him seemed at the same time to be trying to distance themselves from the much older stallion,

Ditzy: He reeked of an old pony and garlic.

but it appeared as though it was mostly due to them being in awe of their headpony.

Doctor: (Starshine) He pulled a coin from behind my ear out of nowhere! Truly he is one of the greatest unicorn mages in history!

        Princess Celestia nodded approvingly of Coltinster’s presence. She had requested personally for him to attend, and was glad that the old pony had been able to make it.

Ditzy: It was usually time for his nap.

She and Luna had been unable to come up with an explanation for the creatures,

Doctor: Ditzy. Has it been established that the princesses have no idea where the Heartless come from yet?

Ditzy: No Doctor. I don’t think so.

Doctor: You’re right. Silly Doctor.

but if they worked in concert with the school then Celestia was certain that they’d be able to find an answer to their problems.

        Celestia began to cast a spell, her horn suddenly glowing with yellow light. The act alone attracted the attention of most of the ponies in the room,

Ditzy: Especially considering it blinded most of them.

but the booming sound of the doors slamming closed and the gentle whoosh of curtains being drawn over the windows managed to gather the others’ gazes to her and Luna.

        “Please everypony, take a spot at the table,” she said, now descending from her throne to take her place at the table’s head.

Doctor: Sitting on the table for some reason.

The Royal Guard officers and Coltinster and his two students all approached the table so that all could look equally at Celestia and Luna while also being able to observe the map of Equestria that had been placed upon the table. The Sun Princess waited a moment before withdrawing a little. “Luna, would you like to begin?”

Doctor: (Luna) All right. Call me Ishmael....

        “Certainly, Celestia,” said the younger alicorn. She looked up at the ponies assembled at the table. “As many of you have heard the report from Captain Crimson Horn and your juniors, last night these two unicorns were assaulted by dark creatures in the Canterlot gardens.” There was a nodding of heads and Coltinster looked at his two charges with questioning eyes, to which they both nodded quickly.

Ditzy: Coltinster was dangerous if provoked.

“Later we discovered ten others of this same type of creature in various places within the city.”

Ditzy: (Luna) Mostly in night clubs. It seems these foul creatures enjoy the nightlife.

Her horn glowed with midnight blue light and a burst of magic summoned a translucent image on the tabletop. Several ponies gasped

Ditzy: The image Luna accidently projected made Starshine and Moondancer turn beet red.

as they stared at the creature with its jet black hide and piercing yellow eyes, and Coltinster eyed it curiously.

Luna waited for only a few seconds before capturing their attention again. “Currently, we have no idea what these creatures are or where they come from,

Ditzy: (Luna) Even a search on Ponypedia proved fruitless.

but we can only assume that their intentions are hostile from their previous actions.

Ditzy: Not the attacks but the mean things they posted on 4Pony.

What we do know, however, is that their bodies can become as two-dimensional as a shadow on the ground, emerge as fully three-dimensional creatures from their shadow, and that when they are defeated they simply…disappear in smoke.”

Ditzy: There were really ninja ponies!

        Eyes shifted towards Moondancer and Starshine, and then back to the princesses. A round of muttering began,

Doctor: (Pony) Is it just me or is Princess Celestia’s flank getting bigger?

Ditzy: (Another Pony) It must be all the cake she has been eating lately.

and was soon silenced as Princess Celestia spoke up. “Luna and I have both examined the area in the gardens where the creatures appeared, and the statue of Discord.” Absolute silenced reined as the name of the spirit of chaos was mentioned. “We have been unable to detect any trace of the creatures’ presence where they appeared, and the seal on Discord has not been tampered with or weakened in any way. Whatever we are dealing with, it is not connected to him.”

        Another round of muttering began,

Doctor: (Pony) If it’s not Discord, then maybe it’s Princess Luna, no Nightmare Moon, trying to usurp the throne again. These creatures seem the sort of thing she might create.

Ditzy: (Another Pony) You idiot, why would she discover and destroy her own creations!?

Doctor: (Pony) To lure us into a false sense of security! She’s the devil I tell you!

and Celestia and Luna let it continue for a minute, sharing a look with one another, before Celestia spoke up again. Quiet recommenced as she spoke. “Therefore, we must take immediate action in order to safeguard everypony from these creatures. Princess Luna and I task the Pegasus Royal Guard to form teams to bring word of these creatures to every city, town, and village in Equestria.

Ditzy: (Celestia) We want to cause a big of a panic as we can.

Doctor: Do you even have evidence that Heartless are outside of Canterlot yet?

Everypony must be warned and made aware of this threat so that they may take appropriate steps to protect themselves. Therefore, Luna will give each team a letter providing them with all details we currently know about these creatures and our recommendations on ways to prevent personal harm;

Ditzy: Don’t let their claws hit you.

Doctor: Run away when approached.

Ditzy: Don’t bother counting how many there are. The author will just forget again.

the letter will also empower each team with the authority to take any reasonable measures to ensure public safety should these creatures appear in their location. Captain Cloudhammer will organize these teams.

Doctor: By using a dart board.

Furthermore, I ask for the Unicorn Royal Guard’s full cooperation and assistance with the Pegasus Royal Guard’s operations. The floor is now open for discussion on this pressing issue.

Doctor: (Celestia) All the issues on our struggling economy can wait.

Captain Cloudhammer, Captain Thunderspark, Coltinster of the School of Gifted Unicorns, please come with me; Moondancer, Starshine, you may accompany us as well.”

Ditzy: (Celestia) All the ponies that can actually do something.

        Princess Celestia turned away from the table just as firestorm of voices erupted from around it. She tuned out the voices of each pony trying to get a word in edgewise and stopped at her sister’s side. “Try to keep them civil will you?”

Ditzy: (Celestia) I have never heard something so foul.

        Luna half-smiled at her. “When is the Guard ever civil behind closed doors about anything that gets them worked up?”

Ditzy: (Luna) Seriously, Sister did thou see what happened during the last year’s Hearth’s Warming Eve Party? The toilets have never been the same since.

Sighing in resignation beneath the cacophony of voices, the strongest belonging to General Arrow of the Pegasus Royal Guard and Major Bright Flare of the Unicorn Royal Guard, Celestia motioned to the ponies she’d named and walked towards a door set behind her throne. An aging white pegasus stallion followed loyally next to an ash unicorn mare. Coltinster and the two students were only a hoof or two behind.

        Once the door had closed behind them, Celestia silently led the five ponies through the corridor to a small antechamber, furnished to be a lounge of sorts for the Princess when she needed to take a break from holding court during the day.

Doctor: Any time she needed a break from the nobles really.

She sealed the door behind them with her magic, and released a pent-up sigh she’d been keeping in. “Thank you for coming. Captain Cloudhammer, Captain Thunderspark, there is another task I have for you.”

        “Anything you ask, Princess,” replied the aging white pegasus, immediately followed by the unicorn nodding silently. Celestia smiled at them both.

Ditzy: (Celestia) Put on this tutu. It will provide excellent protection from the shadows.

        “Captain Thunderspark, I need you to assign a Unicorn Guard that will go with each of Captain Cloudhammer’s pegasi teams. Luna’s report is as accurate as can be given the limited contact we have had with these creatures.

Doctor: (Celestia) Even though it is almost unreadable because Luna still writes in Middle Equestrian.

Ditzy: (Luna) Than fahve shawdows creetures  imerging fromm the shawdows on the grownd and ackacted two ponies neighmed Starshine and Moondancer with there suarp klahz.

Unicorn magic and its versatility appear to be the most effective weapon against them at this time.

Doctor: Really? Smashing them into something seemed to work pretty well.

I also task you to divide the remaining Unicorn Guards into teams that will scour and patrol Equestria on hoof. If your superiors are as they were when I promoted them,

Ditzy: (Thunderspark) Drunk and barely standing?

then they should be able to coordinate with aerial surveillance from the Pegasus Guards.”

        “It will be done, Princess,” the ash-coloured mare answered, nodding her head again.

        “In addition,” continued Celestia as she turned back to the pegasus, “once your teams have been organized, Captain Cloudhammer, I would like you to assemble another team and a chariot large enough for six ponies.

Ditzy: (Celestia) Bring me six ponies with attitude.

Bring the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony, and the dragon Spike,

Ditzy: Where is he going to sit? The chariot is only big enough for six ponies!

Doctor: They can tie him to a rope at the end of the chariot and he can ride that way.

here to Canterlot. Luna and I will explain the situation to them personally.”

Doctor: (Celestia) In a musical number.

        “The Elements?” asked Starshine, the student finally getting the courage to utter a syllable in the presence of the Princess.

        “But why would Twilight Sparkle need to come here?” wondered Moondancer.

Doctor: (Facehoofs) I thought that would be obvious.

        “Don’t you see?” Captain Thunderspark asked them. “Equestria’s never encountered anything like this before. Princess Celestia isn’t going to take any chances.”

Ditzy: (Thunderspark) She plans on encasing every town and city in Equestria with a magical bubble.

Captain Cloudhammer nodded once more and dipped into a slight bow. “As you command.” The Sun Princess nodded her head and turned towards the other unicorn in the room.

        “Coltinster, what are your thoughts on all of this?”

Doctor: (Coltinster) Zzzzz... er what? Get those dang kids off my lawn!

        The bearded unicorn smiled mysteriously at the princess. “I think that the appearance of these creatures signify that Equestria sits on the verge of a monumental and pivotal occurrence in its history,” he said whimsically.

Ditzy: He’s saying something whimsically. We should probably listen to him.

“Think on it for a moment everypony. Creatures that have not once been seen in memory of our dear Celestia, who has lived the lifetimes of many, many ponies, are now suddenly popping up out of the shadows and vanishing just as quickly into them. There is no precedent for their like, and we have not even a body to examine in order to understand just what they are.

Doctor: Just...capture one alive?

Creatures of this kind cannot possibly be natural in occurrence; else we would have seen something like them before, and certainly if they are appearing in the middle of Canterlot itself. No my friends, what we are dealing with is something beyond the current comprehension of ponies,

Ditzy: (Coltinster) Looking them in the eyes will surely drive a pony insane.

for it is not in the natural order of life.”

        “Headpony Coltinster, what do you know?” Starshine questioned, awed out of his mind.

Ditzy: (Shakes head) Nightshade. I heard it’s becoming popular lately with young mares and stallions.

        “Know? Know!? I know much more than you colt! I’ve lived these last fifty winters knowing more than you and learning more with each passing day. In the last sentence you spoke I’ve already learned something new, even, that you are like those young ponies that are so impressionable and awed whenever some old ass

Ditzy: I thought he was a pony.

Doctor: It’s a human expression.

like me makes a profound statement. What do I know indeed!”

Doctor: I like this guy. He seems to be the only one in the story so far with his head on straight.

Ditzy: I think it is because you are both crotchety old ponies.

Doctor: ...

He coughed, quite tickled at the looks on Starshine, Moondancer, and the two captains’ faces. Celestia quietly giggled to herself. He had said that he had lived fifty winters on several separate occasions in her presence, one eight years ago, another twenty, and even another over fifty years prior.

Ditzy: I see! I think Coltinster is really Star Swirl the Bearded! No pony ever did learn how he died.

Doctor: Really? We will have to look into that when we get out of here.

        Coltinster continued. “Now, what I know about these…erm, ‘Shadows’, I suppose we can call them,

Ditzy: How about...Shadow Crawlers? That describes them nicely.

 is very little. However, what I have said is just what I have thought, as Princess Celestia asked for. I believe that these Shadows are not from Equestria, and are as unrelated to the animals of Equestria as dragons are to dragonflies.”

Ditzy: As Pegasi Cake is to Pegasi!

Doctor: As Tartarus is tartar sauce!

        “I agree,” Princess Celestia told him. “However, as you have stated, I have lived a long life and my memory is not the clearest thing at times.

Doctor: Things got a bit awkward and hectic that one time when she forgot Twilight’s birthday.

I cannot recall having seen creatures like this before, but that does not mean that they have not appeared in Equestria’s history before. It is possible that a pony may have come across these creatures before, in the time of Discord or while exploring on their own.

Doctor: (Celestia) Maybe you can find something in the newest Daring Do novel.

My sister and I cannot be all places at once, nor can we see all that occurs in our realm. Therefore, I ask for the School of Gifted Unicorns to search the Archives for any clue we may find within to solve the riddle of these…‘Shadows’.”

Ditzy: Riddle me this Batpony!

        Coltinster bowed. “As you say, Your Highness.” He turned sharply towards his two students. “Well? What are you waiting for? The Princess gave a royal command. Get those hooves in motion and move!” Startled out of their wits, the two students cantered off,

Ditzy: And...leaving a puddle on the floor too. Ew...

completely ignoring their sore and healing muscle tissue after the scratches the Shadows had given them.

Doctor: Celestia decided to close down all hospitals due to the emergency.

Coltinster turned back to Princess Celestia. “If you’ll excuse me, Princess Celestia, I have a faculty to inform that all their classes and experiments are to be halted by your command.

Doctor: (Facehoofs) Really?

Ditzy: (Moondancer) Strange creatures should attack us more often.

It’s a good thing too; Hoofer was trying to propose the building of a machine that would drain ponies of their pigmentation to create rainbows. The old coot’s a raving lunatic I tell you,

Doctor: Indeed. That doesn’t sound safe or practical.

Ditzy: Where are they going to get to volunteers?

pity that he’s a genius too.”

Ditzy: Isn’t that always the thing?

Coltinster’s mauve horn glowed white, and with a flash he had teleported away.

        Captain Thunderspark chuckled as soon as he was gone. “We should hire him to train new recruits. He’d sure whip them into shape faster than old Blue Moon can.” Celestia could not withhold her grin.

Ditzy: The mention of whipping got her excited.

        “By your leave, Princess Celestia,” Captain Cloudhammer then said, “Thunderspark and I need to get started on assembling our teams. I’ll return as soon as I can with the Bearers.” He and Thunderspark saluted smartly before leaving the room.

Doctor: Thunderspark feared that Celestia would send him into the sun if he didn’t.

        Now alone, Princess Celestia sighed once more and slowly placed one hoof in front of the other. She was dreading returning to the throne room.

Ditzy: Another boring meeting awaited her. And us.

Captains Cloudhammer and Thunderspark she had known longer than any of their superiors, and trusted that if they’d just accept the promotions she kept offering every year that they wouldn’t have let the power of their new positions turn them into blustering foals

All: Too late.

concerned more about escaping the desks they flew to play golf than about matters important to the Royal Guards.

Doctor: They would play games on their phone instead.

Although, when the reputation of the corps was at risk or Equestria in a crisis, they all certainly shaped up and reminded her just why she had promoted them in the first place.

Ditzy: Their rugged good looks...er I mean their skills as soldiers.

Over half of the Wonderbolts had been members of the Pegasus Royal Guard, after all.

Doctor: I thought they were just stunt flyers.

Ditzy: No silly. They do search and rescue and protect Equestria from danger!

        Celestia’s body stiffened instantly as she felt the magical energy roll against her as soon as the back door opened. She had only to gallop a full two lengths of her body to bear witness to what was causing the disturbance. The scene in the throne room that awaited her was not the one Celestia had expected at all.

Ditzy: A giraffe in clown make up was fighting Heartless.

Instead of abrasive voices or enthused impromptu speeches or arguments, everypony was standing in anxious silence in front of a swirling mass of blue and black cloud. Lightning skittered amidst the cloud,

Ditzy: It was a Kracko.

sparking every so often with a crackle that raised the hairs of manes and tails across the room.

Doctor: Rarity fainted when she saw this.

        Luna turned her head and spotted her sister. “Celestia! It appeared from out of thin air. It gave no warning to its appearance, and—” Celestia frowned the same moment her sister stopped speaking.

Doctor: Finally something interesting is happening.

Ditzy: (Nods)

The cloud began surging with energy; the sheer wind being expelled and blown around the room could attest to the agitation in the air. It pulsed with light, and Celestia’s horn quickly illuminated with soft pink light as she cast a detection spell.

        Something was coming out.

Doctor: It was a naked, hairless, muscular, bipedal, ape-like creature with a brown mane.

-M-G-

All: Oh come on!

        Far away from Equestria,

Doctor: Camelu?

Ditzy: The Lost World?

a tall humanoid mouse was laughing at three figures that were staring at him with stunned expressions. One of these three was a white-feathered duck, another was a dog-man, and a third another black-furred mouse, except this second one stood only about the height of the duck at barely over two feet. The duck was dressed in a blue jacket and hat that resembled a beret, the dog in a green turtleneck, black vest, yellow pants, orange hat and white gloves with goggles over his forehead; and the smaller mouse was garbed in a jacket of two colours, red on the lower half and black on the upper, red pants with yellow pouches on the front, and yellow shoes.

Ditzy: In other words, Donald, Mickey, and Goofy.

Doctor: Does the author think we forgot what they look like?

The tallest mouse was in an outfit similar to the smaller mouse, though his jacket was gold and orange, and his pants were a pale, sandy yellow.

“Ha-Cha-Cha,” laughed the tallest rodent,

Doctor: He’s a Jimmy Durante caricature?

twirling a purple device in his right hand. “Looks like none of those bozos are gonna be messin’ with us for a while now.” The mouse stopped twirling the device in his hand and blew at a rod that was sticking out from a concave piece of metal, dispersing the smoke that came out of the rod’s bulb. A faint ping sounded from the rear of the device, and the mouse smiled pleasantly and opened up a compartment. He withdrew a steaming muffin in his hand and bit into it.

Doctor: (baffled) What?!

Ditzy: I...don’t know...

 “Mm. Taste that Mick? It’s the sweet, sweet taste of my victory. Ha-Cha-Cha!”

Ditzy: That’s silly. Muffins taste like love not victory!

        “What did you do to them Mortimer?”

Doctor: So this is the OC the author was talking about in the prologue?

Ditzy: I guess. I have no idea who he is.

the smaller mouse growled, flexing his white-gloved right hand. White light flashed into existence around it, and suddenly the mouse was gripping a dark-coloured handle surrounded on four sides by a silver guard. Extending on one end of the guard was the blade of a sword-like weapon, though it was a cylindrical rod made of gold. Where the blade left the hilt was a band of red and at the other end a block of gold extended out, the shape of a three-pointed crown apparently cut out like a cookie-cutter had been put into the metal.

Ditzy: Yes, we know what Mickey’s keyblade looks like. You don’t need to explain it.

Overall, the weapon was in the shape of a giant skeleton key, and extending from the opposite end of the hilt was a chain of golden links, ending in a golden three-circled mouse head.

        ‘Mortimer’ grinned and kept his questioner waiting a moment as he chewed on his muffin. He opened his mouth and spoke, the dog, duck, and smaller mouse able to see partially chewed food escaping off his tongue.

Ditzy: Ew...

“I just sent ‘em someplace else where they can’t interfere with the boss’ plans,” he replied, “and good luck finding them, Your Majesty.”

Doctor: (Mickey) I sense condescension in your voice.

        “Where are they?” demanded the duck, anger making the white feathers near his eyes turn red as his blood boiled.

        Mortimer laughed. “That’s the beauty of this little beauty; I have no idea where it took ‘em! But you can bet that wherever they are, it’s plenty far from here!”

Ditzy: Ironically they landed only a few hooves behind them.

The smaller mouse lunged forward, his overlarge skeleton key

Ditzy: Why doesn’t he just call it the keyblade?

Doctor: It’s... a surprise?

Ditzy: A keyblade in a Kingdom Hearts fanfic. Who would have guessed?

 swinging out in front of him, but Mortimer jumped back and looked out the window he was standing near to. It was a long way down.

        “Gosh Mickey, I’d love to stay and get my tail kicked by you three ninnies,” he said, turning back to them, “but I’ve got bigger and better things to be doing.”

Doctor: That’s...pretty intelligent for a cartoon henchmen.

Ditzy: If only Pete would learn this lesson.

A pool of darkness suddenly appeared beneath the mouse, and a surging mass of black, dark blue, and purple enveloped him.

Doctor: (Mortimer) Oh god someone help me please!

 A moment later, the swirling hole of darkness shot back into the ground and vanished in wisps.

        “Get back here!” the duck roared, shaking his fist at the empty space where Mortimer had stood only seconds before.

Ditzy: (Donald) Why I oughta...

        “He’s gone, Donald,” the dog said regretfully. Donald tapped his foot repeatedly in frustration and folded his arms over one another.

        “Aw phooey!”

Doctor: Ah classic Donald.

        “What do we do now, Your Majesty?” the dog asked, turning towards the small mouse. Mickey suppressed a sigh and turned towards Donald and Goofy, his Court Magician and Captain of his Knights. The King’s Keyblade

Ditzy: Now he’s calling it a keyblade?

vanished from his hand in a shimmer of light.

Doctor: No three paragraph explanation of the keyblade and how it works? I’m impressed author.

        “Welp, much though I don’t like it, Mortimer’s right. We can’t do much right now besides look for them. Rei’s the only one who knows who the Keepers are,

Ditzy: Rei? As in Evangelion’s Rei?

and if we can’t find them all, or if the Horned King finds them first,

Doctor: The Horned King?

Ditzy: An OC villain I guess. Though he is probably just Xehanort in disguise or some facet of him.

Doctor: Like his lebido? Don’t look at me like that. I can make those kind of jokes sometimes.

I don’t even want to imagine what’s going to happen to the worlds.

Ditzy: (Mickey) Without the keepers everything will become very untidy.

Donald, when we get back to the ship, you might want to tell Daisy you’re going to miss that date of yours.”

Doctor: Yikes.

        The duck groaned. “I’d rather fight Xehanort’s Heartless again than tell Daisy that,” he muttered under his breath.

Ditzy: I think I would go against the Terrible Zodin again than face that!

Doctor: Agreed.

-M-G-

Sorry everypony. No Sora this chapter, but we did get a minor villain, a major villain, a couple of cameo appearances,

Ditzy: Maybe I appeared in the background somewhere.

and hey, look! Mickey, Donald, and Goofy!

Doctor: (Author) Maybe it will distract you from all the tedious exposition in this chapter.

May the Grace of the Valar Protect You

Shire Folk

Doctor: What a boring chapter.

Ditzy: Well Sora is showing up in the next time. That will certainly liven thing up!

-------------------------------------------------------------------

The Doctor and Ditzy walked out the theater. They were discussing something.

“You know what I really loved about this chapter?” The Doctor asked in an annoyed tone. “The author loves to explain things we should already know.”

“I know! It’s so strange. I don’t think many ponies would read this story if they weren’t already a fan of both series.” Ditzy replied. “Or at least have a passing knowledge of them.”

“I really hope this doesn’t become a common occurrence.” The Doctor said wearily.

“So my test little test subjects, how did you like the story?” Mr. X chimed in from the screen in the middle of the room in his usual distorted voice.

“Well…” The Doctor was about reply when he was interrupted by a high pitch distorted voice. In fact, it sounded familiar.

“Hiya Dinky whatcha up to!?” Said the high pitched voice.

“P-Pinkie Pie?!” said Mr. X or rather Dinky in a rather alarmed voice. “How did you…”

Pinkie Pie gasped. “Timey? Ditzy? What are you doing….”

Pinkie’s voice was cut off and was replaced with silence. The Doctor and Ditzy stayed quiet of some time. Until the Ditzy finally decided to say something. “Uh, Mr. X or should I say Dinky, are you still there?” She got no reply.

“I guess he is still dealing with Pinkie Pie. This could take awhile.” The Doctor said while doing some stretching.

“Uh, Doctor. Dinky is a girl’s name.” Ditzy replied. ”Mr. X is probably a she.”

The Doctor was about to ask how she knew this, but then remembered that she has been around pony names all her life. So this shouldn’t surprise him and Dinky did sound like a feminine name.

        “I hope Pinkie will be alright.” Ditzy flattened her ears.

        “She can take care of herself.” This the Doctor didn’t doubt. Pinkie was amazingly skilled at avoiding danger. Once he saw her run through a minefield that was being bombarded completely unharmed despite all odds. She said her Pinkie Sense helped her. The Doctor decided it was best not to ask how that was possible. It seemed a very good idea to the Doctor to not to ask questions when Pinkie Pie is involved, if you want to keep your sanity.

        With Pinkie here escape seemed more likely. Hopefully. She’s bound to show up again sometime. She had a habit of showing up when least expected. “Ditzy? Have you ever heard a Dinky in Ponyville?” The Doctor asked while rubbing his chin with his hoof. Ponyville seemed to be the mostly likely answer to where they were.

        Ditzy considered this for some time. “I don’t think so.” She said hesitantly. “But I’m no Pinkie Pie.”

        The Doctor sighed. Still, they were one step closer to learning the truth of this place. “Who are you Dinky?” The Doctor said quietly to himself.

A faint ping sounded from the rear of the device, and the mouse smiled pleasantly and opened up a compartment. He withdrew a steaming muffin in his hand and bit into it. Next Chapter: Episode 3 - Guardians of Magic - Chapter 2 Estimated time remaining: 30 Hours, 35 Minutes