Twilight and I were enjoying some morning coffee outside, talking about the party the night before when I got two letters in rapid succession. One was a formal invite to Fleur’s soiree happening in a few days and the other was Ponyville’s glassblower telling me that he’d made a working prototype of the thing I’d had him make for me. Both of these little tidbits made me smile, so I asked Twilight if she wanted to accompany me into town so she could see my little pet project and if she wanted to go to Fleur’s party with me. She agreed to both, so after finishing our coffee and taking separate showers, we wrote a letter to Fleur, left a note for Trixie, and headed into town. The glassblower guy was up nice and early, though he tried to request more money from me for the job. I told him that a hundred and fifty bits for a single piece was more than fair and he stopped his bullshit once Twilight explained the ins and outs of a proper business agreement. He’d almost gotten sworn at for trying to con me, but the Son of Sinbad worked well enough and I just wanted to get Twilight super lit.

We stopped at Twilight’s Treebrary since we’d been spending most of our time at my house and my lover just wanted to lay in her own bed with me for a little while, so we put off using SoS until after we did some mild cuddling in Twilight’s bed. I was starving after an hour, so when we came downstairs to find that Spike hadn't made much of a breakfast, we went shopping to fill her pantry, though that reminded me that I needed to do the same. I left SoS at Twilight’s for the time being and we bought a lot of shit. Like, a ridiculous amount of crap. Twilight ended up teleporting our bags back to our respective houses and we agreed to meet for lunch after we got our own breakfast situations sorted, but I bargained for brunch at my place since Twilight still can’t cook worth a damn.

I got home and got my shit sorted while Trixie was meandering out of bed. She shyly asked if she could borrow some of Roxy’s livery since she still didn’t have any of her own and I suggested that she spend the rest of her morning going to go get some, especially if she had a date later. That made her blush, though she saw the wisdom in my words and agreed that it was a good use of her time. I made her some pancakes as a quick breakfast and she went off to go do just that while the day was still young.

She actually walked into Twilight as she was leaving and they exchanged some pleasantries, and when asked about what she was about to go do, Trixie mentioned that she had to go pick up some undergarments so she could stop using mine. Twilight suggested that she go visit Rarity and have her show Trixie some of the best stuff around town and Trixie agreed after a moment’s hesitation, not wanting to disturb someone for her own personal bullshit. I respected that.

Twilight helped me make some stuff and I devoured fifteen massive pancakes. Cherry warned me that eating so many pancakes was something Pinkie would do, so I made a healthy salad and ate it without anything on it, which totally sucked. Something about that odd situation made Twilight ask me when my birthday was and I told her that I didn’t really remember since it had been at least five years since I celebrated it on the actual day. I did remember that it was sometime in early May, that being the fifth month on the Gregorian calendar. Twilight told me that were were closing in on the end of the fifth month on the Equestrian calendar, so we’d most likely missed my twenty first birthday. She wouldn’t let that stand, so she told me to write down everyone that I wanted at my birthday party, but I responded by telling her that I just didn’t want one. I’d attended Spike and Rarity’s birthday parties and they just hadn't really appealed to me at all, but Twilight was adamant that we celebrate me making it through another year alive. I pointed out that I’d actually died like, three times, and she told me to shut up.

Twilight refused to talk to me until I gave her my list, which was completely unfair. I thought it was some bullshit, so I wrapped her up with my tentacle and gave her a tummy rub against her will, making her turn into Pony shaped preserves in my arms. I gently tummy tortured her until she started shivering, which made me stop before I could properly piss her off. It was one thing to molest her, but it was another to make her orgasm against her will. However, Twilight immediately hopped off of my lap and dragged me to my room so I could finish the job, but even then I still had to make her a list of friends and family.

I invited pretty much everyone I liked and we agreed to have the party at the end of the month, though Celestia and Luna immediately sent back notes asking what I wanted as a present. I didn’t want anything, actually, and told them as much, but Twilight told me that I was going to be getting presents. I put my foot down and told her that I would submit to the party, but not to getting free shit for no other reason than existing. Twilight evidently heard the steel in my tone and backed down. Luna actually kept up a short chain of letters and asked if she could teleport me to Canterlot for some time to ourselves, but Twilight told me that she would put a hoof somewhere uncomfortable unless she could watch. I let Luna know what she’d said and the Princess of the Night agreed after a few minutes.

Without further ado, Luna popped into my house and requested that Twilight and I keep the day’s events to ourselves. I told her off for just teleporting in instead of knocking like I’d asked her to do multiple times, but I was dutifully ignored until I lead us upstairs where I started ordering Luna around like she was my bitch. Without going into too much detail, the afternoon’s proceedings involved a paddle, a small switch, some hoofcuffs, some orgasm denial, and more than a handful of toys, though any that were inserted into the usual place were only handled by Luna by her own request. I respected that enough and may have been a little rougher with her as a result, but it was nothing compared to what I put Strawberry Petal through. Seriously, that woman was a glutton for punishment in all the best ways.

Anal may or may not have been offered to me, but Twilight didn’t want me to partake in that so Luna and I were both shit out of luck. I’d rather desired to nail another princess, but it just wasn’t in the cards for me today, so I sighed and asked Twilight if she’d be willing to take care of me afterwards. She told me that I had someone right in front of me willing to follow orders, so I turned to Luna and told her to open wide.

I learned very quickly that Luna was not good at that.

After being bitten far too hard, I left a mushroom shaped imprint on her cheek and replaced my trousers, frustrated and a little annoyed. Twilight and Luna were fucking with me and I knew it, so I decided to get back at both of them. I moved onto the cane and let Luna get used to some mild stuff before I put my full weight and force behind a swing. It was fucking brutal. A large welt rose almost immediately on both cheeks as Luna let out a pitiful yelp and started whimpering, so Twilight rushed over to see if she was okay. After some shaky assurances that she would be okay, Luna turned around and gave me a black look, her eyes glowing. The next thing I knew, I was in Canterlot Castle, Luna was fully clothed, and she had me by my throat. It was made very clear that if I ever hit her that hard again, she would do the same to me tenfold. I warned if that if she ever bit my dick again, that I would spend years worming my way into her heart and tear her apart just when she got comfortable with loving me. My threat was a lot more savage then hers, so she told me that she would abuse Twilight in my place. I replied by threatening to leave her and Celestia completely if she so much as laid a finger on Twilight.

I understood that I’d fucked up, and at this point, I was just fucking with her. When she drew me in close to snarl something or other, I licked her nose and fondled her ears a little bit, giving her a dopey smile. Luna was rather confused at my change in tone and demeanor, so she asked if I was crazy. I responded by telling her that I was crazy enough to taunt and chastise royalty on a daily basis. Luna let me go and she teleported us back to my place, though Twilight was working herself into a tizzy, crying and apologizing for teaming up with Luna to mess with me. I gave her a kiss and told her that pulling the wool over my eyes only worked if I was super high or blackout drunk. She was surprised to learn that I’d known that they were messing with me, but when I asked about how they’d gotten the idea to fuck with me, she said that they’d come up with it during a telepathic conversation.

I thought that was cheating like fuck, so Luna and I teamed up to get revenge on Twilight. Luna encased her in a magic bubble after healing her aching bum and teleported us to a decent sized hill outside of Ponyville. Twilight asked why she was in a Magic-Proof Bubble, but Luna just smiled before kicking her down the hill like a Spartan. I thought it was fucking hilarious. Luna and I took our time in catching up to Twilight, and once we did, she was still lying down after being made dizzier than a college freshman after their first party. Luna let the bubble go and Twilight encased me in one of her own, so Luna rolled me down the same hill. I, however, am awesome and just tucked myself into a ball to avoid getting too dizzy. It worked well enough, so I was ready and on my feet when Luna and Twilight came down to laugh at me.

Luna and I pretty much just kept doing mean shit to eachother. She whacked me in the balls once or twice, so I clam slammed her with my tentacle and we stopped going after the genitals once we laid out some ground rules. Twilight teleported home so she wouldn’t get caught in the crossfire, and after Luna and I were done fucking around, we joined Twilight for a cup of tea and told her about some of the terrible things we did to each other, like Luna running her thumb up the crack of my arse or me swatting one of Luna’s breasts while wrestling to get some much needed distance. All in all, it was a fucked up but fun way to spend the morning and pretty much every part of my body was aching, though it was in a good way.

While cuddling and enjoying a nice cup of tea, Twilight asked, “So why are you and Luna so close now? I know you two bonded over the… Stuff, from earlier, but the way you hit her with that cane made me want to cry!”

I shrugged. “I don’t really know myself. When we left, we threatened each other a little and we just decided to get back at you. Luna’s always had a whimsical streak in her just like me and I guess our stupididity just works well together.”

“You know you pronounced that incorrectly, right?” Twilight inquired.

“Pronounced what incorrectly, cherry?” I asked innocently.

She rolled her eyes. “Moving on. I just don’t see how you can hurt somepony like that and still be friends.”

“It’s because we’ve both done far worse things to people and had far worse things done to us. I wouldn’t stay mad at Luna for long if she did something similar to me, but if she hit you like that, I’d be out for her head. We just know what lines can and can’t be crossed, though I’m still finding a few of hers.” I said.

“It would make me feel better about you two if you promised to never hurt each other like that again.” Twilight said softly. “I know Princess Luna likes pain, but she was really upset when you hit her too hard.”

“I know. She grabbed me by the breathing bits when we teleported away. I promise I won’t hit her like that again without good reason.”

“No, I don’t want you to hit her like that at all!”

I pulled my arm from her shoulders and gave her a look. “Twilight, there’s a very serious possibility that I may have to kill Luna depending on the situation. I’m not going to make a promise I can’t keep.”

She glared at me. “You have a lot of ways to avoid hurting her, like knocking her out-”

“Fucking how? Luna is a lot stronger than me, and my magic is fucking pathetic compared to hers. Luna has Unicorn, Dark, and True Magic at her disposal and she’s had thousands of years to get good at it, but that’s not even mentioning that my Dark Magic will never work against her unless I go full-blown Revenant. You and I both know that’s just not an option. I’m strong, cherry, but I don’t have a hope of just ‘knocking out’ Luna.”

Twilight set her jaw and crossed her arms, staring straight ahead. “You should be more focused on finding a way to not kill her.”

I scoffed. “I’m trying not to die and that’s literally the only thing I can do. If you think of something, feel free to let me know.”

“I want you to end things with Luna.” Twilight said critically.

“I’ll write the note when I get home.” I said, trying to even out my tone.

Twilight waited a long minute before replying. “Thank you.”

I cleared my throat. “You already know I’ll do whatever you ask within reason.”

“I know.” She turned to me. “I trust you, Max, but I don’t like that you’re so friendly with somepony that might try to kill you.”

“There’s a reason I’m so friendly with her, Twilight. Friends hesitate to kill friends, and even if that only buys me a second with Luna, it’ll count in the end if I have anything to say about it.”

“...So having you break things off with Princess Luna is worse for you than remaining in this terrible relationship?” Twilight asked, exasperated.

I shrugged. “To my knowledge, yes.”

“That makes no sense.”

“That’s because you’re naive.” I stated simply. “Don’t take offense to that, by the way. From my perspective, most ponies are naive.”

Twilight grabbed my hand. “You’re forgetting that you let me read your journals. I already knew that. You’ve seen a lot more of the world than nearly any pony in Ponyville, and you haven’t even been here a year yet.”

I sighed and squeezed her hand. “You’re astute and you pay attention. Too much sometimes, but I’m glad for it now.”

She laid her head on my shoulder. “I guess you could continue your thing with Luna if you think it’ll make you live longer.”

“I really do. Either that or she’s using pain to distance herself from me, but she seems to enjoy it well enough.”

Twilight sighed. “I love you, but I really don’t understand you sometimes.”

“But that just makes me interesting, right?” Please say yes.

She chuckled. “Most of the time. Sometimes it’s infuriating, but-” There was a knock on her door. “But it’s worth it to be with you. I’m going to go get that.”

“I’ll be waiting with baited breath, my beloved.” I grinned and she patted my arm before going to the door.

I could hear Rainbow’s tomboyish voice from the library proper and I severely hoped that she wouldn’t try to start shit when I’d just sorted out the mini-argument I had with Twilight. That hope slowly dwindled as I heard the conversation she was having with Twilight.

“What kind of guy just takes the side of somepony he barely even knows!?” Rainbow yelled. “You need to sort Max out, one way or the other, Twilight!”

“Rainbow, I really don’t appreciate you talking to me like this and Max is his own stallion. You should be talking to him, not me. I’m not taking sides on this-”

“Why not!? I’ve known you longer and he’s in the wrong! He threw me out of his house during a slumber party that was supposed to be just for us!”

Rainbow’s voice was rising, so I got up from my seat and got a little closer. I had faith that Twilight could make her see reason, but Rainbow seemed to be looking for a reason to be mad.

“Because you really did disrespect him, and Trixie never actually did anything to you. If you would’ve just given her a chance-”

“Why should I!? It’s not my job to be nice to every pony I come across and she never gave me a reason to like her in the first place!”

Twilight was quiet for a moment. “...If you think about what you just said, I’m sure you’ll realize just how terrible that was.”

“It’s true! Max is a complete shithead to half the ponies he talks to and he just gets away with it, so why can’t I!? I decide I don’t like one pony and suddenly I’m the bad guy!”

“Rainbow, everypony knows Max isn’t a good pony. He says it himself all the time! Acting like him gets you treated like him, so you shouldn’t be surprised!”

It was Dash’s turn to get quiet. “I am not acting like that buckhead.”

Twilight’s voice turned sub-zero. “You’re right. Max usually has a reason for acting like a mule.”

I heard an impact and something heavy fall to the floor. “Take it back!” Rainbow shouted. The fuck just happened?

“Did you just hit me?” Twilight asked, shocked.

Oh. That’s what happened.

I numbly walked into view and saw Twilight on her arse, rubbing her jaw with a furious Rainbow Dash standing over her. Rainbow might have been mad, but I was so far beyond that, I don’t comprehend how I didn’t black out and maul her to death. Twilight heard me coming and looked at me, her eyes widening before I raised my hand in a gesture asking for her silence. Through a clarity I’d never witnessed before, I realized that murky smoke was rising in rivulets from my skin, but I didn’t pay much attention to it. Rainbow was now looking at me, somewhere between shocked and terrified to the point where her body seemed completely frozen as if she was a deer in headlights.

Punishments popped into my mind. I could Wither her and make her lose a great majority of her youth, but Twilight would be upset by that. I could inflict Pain on her, but the same problem would arise. Something told me that I could make her fade into her own shadow and see how she liked being incorporeal for awhile, but that just didn’t appeal to me, so I decided to stay on my nice streak and only do something mildly horrible.

My magic found its way into my throat without me having to focus it. “Rainbow Dash.”

She was silent.

“Kneel.” I commanded.

Her body moved against its will to obey mine. Once she was kneeling, Twilight stood up and grabbed my hand, but her words fell on deaf ears.

“Apologize.”

Her eyes went to my lover, full to the brim with tears of fear and hysteria. “T-T-Tw-Twilight I-I-I-”

“Speak Clearly.”

She swallowed hard, but I was sure that it was an automatic reaction. “Twilight, I’m sorry for hitting you. I was wrong-”

“Head Down. You Don’t Deserve To Look At Her.”

Her chin touched her chest.

“Lower.”

She put her head to the floor.

“Continue.”

“I was wrong, and I promise that I’ll never do it again. I was just so angry that you said I was like Max and I’m mad at him.”

I turned to Twilight who was staring at me in horror. I cleared the magic from my voice and spoke again. “Do you accept her apology?”

“M-Max?” Twilight murmured.

“Yes, my beloved?” I stared at her blankly.

“W-Wh-What h-happens i-if I s-s-say n-no?” She gripped my arm tightly.

“She leaves. Killing her would upset you, otherwise I would have done so already.” I stated matter-of-factly.

Twilight seemed a little less scared now. “I-I don’t accept, just don’t hurt her. Please?”

“As you wish.” I raised my hand in Rainbow’s direction and she dropped into her shadow. I don’t really know where I sent her for sure, but I knew it was still in Ponyville and it was somewhere I’d been.

At Twilight’s renewed fear, I said, “She is alive and well, though Rainbow is no longer welcome in my presence.”

“M-Max? A-Amour? A-Are you in there?” She asked, searching my face with tears streaking down her cheeks.

When I went to brush them away, she blanched at my touch. “I am Max, but not. Once I calm, I will sleep. We will speak when I wake.”

“O-Okay.” She said anxiously.

I nodded and looked for a shadow to step into. Twilight’s was the closest, so I did a little jump and hopped into hers, slipping into the darkness and somehow changing momentum in the middle of my fall to start rising. At the shift, I felt myself pass through a barrier of some kind and I saw Noir’s face for a moment before surfacing in my closet. I don’t know how I got there or how the magic I’d used worked, but I still knew that I would be better once I slept. I walked out of my closet and scared the shit out of Berry Blitz before ordering her to get out of my room. She wasted no time and I laid down, falling asleep moments after closing my eyes.

For some odd reason, instead of heading into the dreamscape, I was in my mindscape and Noir had her hands on my shoulders within seconds. “Maximus, Calm Your Heart.” I could feel the magic in her voice, but right now, I had the option of resisting it.

I decided to listen to her and felt the strength leave my body instantaneously, leaving Noir to hold me to her chest. “What the fuck was that?” I whispered, my voice as weak as the rest of me.

“That was you going ‘Full Blown Revenant’.” Noir explained. “It would seem that assaulting Twilight in anger is a trigger for you to ‘lose your shit’, as you would say.”

“Holy shit… That was…”

“Terrifying? Invigorating? Addictive?” Noir said softly.

“Yeah.”

I felt a the customary breeze as the scene shifted and opened my eyes to see that we were on the beach again. Noir picked me up and laid down on a spacious lounge chair, but she held me on top of her like I was a child or something. I also noticed that Noir was slowly growing much larger than me and that I was suddenly wearing gym shorts and no shoes. Noir stuffed my now tiny form between her breasts and I rolled onto my stomach so that I was looking up at her. It was an interesting feeling.

“Max…” She said in a pleasant tone. .

The vibrations from her voice soothed me. “I don’t wanna do that again.” I replied.

“If Rainbow Dash’s sheer terror was anything to go by, she will never lay a hand on Twilight again. I would ask that you allow Twilight to be upset with her, but it is clear that you take the offense very personally.”

“Rainbow would be dead if it wasn’t for Twilight.”

“She would indeed, though I am now very happy that you have Twilight in your life, that is to say, happier than I was before. If you do become a Revenant, I would not be surprised to find that your morality would stay intact as long as Twilight is around to guide you.”

“And when she’s gone?”

“Then Luna and Celestia will have no choice but to put you down.” She said sadly.

“Shame. Is there anything we can do to stop me from getting to that point again?”

“Besides turning you into an emotionless husk, no, there is not. Going into a ‘Blank Slate’ kind of fury happens rarely enough for you anyway. It may come in handy, so I would not seal away your magic either.”

“...I don’t like that Twilight saw it.”

“She could have seen you kill one of her friends. She could have seen you tell one of her friends to kill themselves. At that level of power, Rainbow Dash had no hope of denying your will.”

“Terrifying.”

“Quite. Do not worry, sweet child, you will be okay. Twilight will be okay. Rainbow can rot in Tartarus or Hell, but she too will be okay, though she will be considerably wiser for today’s events.”

“I hope so.” I closed my eyes and enjoyed Noir’s soft, warm, squishy fur for a little bit.

She hummed me a song to help calm me down a little more and I would have fallen asleep to the gentle vibrations if I wasn’t already technically asleep. I still don’t know how exactly I ended up in my mindscape, but I’m chalking it up to either Noir or magic and calling it there. For the moment, I was just enjoying the time away from my problems, though they still worried me.

For one, how safe was I to be around if I wasn’t in control of my actions? I was already prepared to kill someone if they ever hurt Twilight, but Rainbow was supposed to be a friend and I knew for a fact that she would have been torn apart slowly and painfully if I’d had my way while I was tapping into the Revenant bullshit. As it was, Twilight was the only reason she was alive and I hoped that the experience would humble Rainbow Dash, just like how Trixie’s near death experiences had humbled her considerably. Noir told me to stop letting it get to me while I was still tucked away in her bosom and she’s telling me to let it go now, but I can’t help but feel like an animal waiting to snap at someone right now. I’m afraid of myself, but I’m more afraid of what happens if someone hurts Twilight and I kill them in front of her. Losing Twilight could mean that I go Revenant early on and that’s not an option either, but it’s pretty clear that while I can think in that state, I can’t reason or be reasoned with by anyone other than her or Noir.

Noir just told me that while I’m a Revenant, she can influence some of my choices by talking to my rational subconscious. I asked if she’d turned me away from killing Rainbow and she denied it, though she did have me come back home and go to sleep so she would calm me down. If anything, she’s my failsafe in case I go off of the deep end, but how could I not worry about becoming a fucking Revenant without warning?

My mind wasn’t completely at rest when Noir told me it was time to go, but it had calmed enough for me to not have a fucking panic attack or something, so I considered myself in the clear for the time being. I felt a shift in the softness I was feeling and sat up in my bed, more than a little wistful that Noir couldn’t have let me take a little more time with her. My muscles ached slightly and my skin felt a little raw, but other than that, I was fine, if not a little mentally exhausted. I heard someone take a step and sat up sighing. Twilight and Celestia were looking at me while I was sleeping (Which was fucking creepy), and I gave them my full attention.

“Sup?” I asked.

Celestia raised her brow. “Twilight said that you were furious with Rainbow Dash. You don’t seem very furious.”

“I had a great nap. Really helped with that.” I replied.

She nodded. “I see. May I have a seat?”

I shrugged. “I have chairs and a bed. Take your pick.”

Celestia moved to sit on the bed and Twilight came to take a spot next to me. “Are you okay, amour?” Twilight asked softly.

I held my hand out and she took it after a moment. That only hurt a little bit. “I’m a lot better than I could have been. You saved a life today, Twilight. I’m really proud of you.” I gave her a little smile.

All I got was a worried look, so I turned to Celestia. “Did Twilight already tell you what happened?”

“She told me that Dark Magic was pouring from your body and you ordered Rainbow Dash to apologize for hitting her.” Celestia said softly.

I nodded. “That’s the gist of it. Apparently I tap into my Dark Magic when I go beyond emotion.”

Celestia sighed. “You tap into it more easily. There is still magic leaking from you, Max.”

“I would seal it if I could, but it would kill me.”

“What makes you so sure?” She asked softly.

“It’s fused into my soul, so I’d effectively be sealing that away to. I might still be alive once I resurrect, but I wouldn’t be Max anymore.” I replied sadly.

“What about limiting your emotions so that you don’t grow that angry again?” Twilight offered.

“No can do.” I said.

“He wouldn’t be the same man he is now. Max would be little more than a husk and would most likely die from starvation or dehydration in turns until we removed the seal.” Celestia replied.

Twilight bit her lip. I noticed that there was a split where Rainbow had punched her. “There has to be something.”

Celestia shook her head and gave Twilight a sad smile. “If the trigger and the cure for Max’s anger are what I think they are, the only way to keep him in his normal state would be for you to stick around.”

I rubbed my thumb along the back of Twilight’s hand. “She’s right. If you weren’t around, I would have hurt Rainbow. Your will is my will when I’m like that.”

“...So if I'm angry enough at somepony, you’ll kill them?” Twilight whispered, shocked.

Celestia and I nodded at the same time and answered in unison. “Yes.”

“...I don’t think we should spend much time apart.”

I kissed her hand. “We already don’t. The problem is with people hurting you, not me being a loose cannon. Barring someone causing you physical harm on purpose, I won’t go into that state again.”

“So I can’t tell you if somepony hurts me?” Twilight asked.

“No, I’m saying I can’t witness it. If someone hurts you and you don’t tell me, then I’d be rather offended. I won’t go into that state again, but I’ll still be mad. No one hurts my cherry.” I gave her a sincere smile, but Twilight still looked worried.

“Still, I’d like to converse with Noir to see if she has any insight on the matter.” Celestia said.

“I forgot you knew about her, otherwise I would’ve told you that everything I’m saying is coming from her. While I was napping, she pulled me into my mindscape and got me out of my mood using her magic.” I responded.

She nodded. “Then I suppose there is nothing I can do. However, thank you for keeping me updated on the situation, Twilight. If something like this happens again, I’d like to know the details of the event.”

“I’ll write you myself if Twilight isn’t able.” I offered.

“That’ll work too. If you’re okay, I need to get back to Canterlot.”

“Twilight’s here and I’ve got Noir plugging some holes. I’m as okay as I’ll get.” I gave her a crooked smile.

Celestia crawled on my bed and gave Twilight and I both a hug before teleporting out, which was fucking rude. My lover pushed me back onto my pillows and laid her head on my chest, making my heart pick up slightly. I’m sure she heard it, but she didn’t comment as I stroked her hair and did precious little else until I realized that I had to pee. I hated to ruin the moment, but I needed to go then and there, so I had Twilight get up for a moment and went to go do my business. When I came back, she was sitting on the bed, waiting for me to return.

I crawled back to where I was and we picked up from there until someone tapped on my door. Berry poked her head in and asked, “I-Is now a bad time?”

“Kinda. What do you need, BB?” I asked.

“I-I know you told me to get out of your room, but you just seemed… Off, I guess. Are you okay?”

I patted Twilight’s arm. “I’ve got her here to keep me on the level. Thank you for your concern, love, and I’m sorry I was a prick earlier.”

Berry smiled. “It’s okay. We all have bad days and it’s nice to know that you have a mare to make it better for you.”

“What if I wanted a stallion? Does that not fit your ideals, you homophobe?” I teased.

Twilight weakly whacked me. “Stop messing with your employees and get back to cuddling. I’m still processing.”

I started stroking her hair again. “You heard her, Berry. Make like a tree and skedaddle.”

Berry gave me a funny look. “I just washed your sheets, just so you know.”

Twilight sat up and closed the door with magic before laying her head back on my chest. “Before you say anything; Yes, I know that was rude, and yes, I could have handled that better.”

“She was invading our alone time. I don’t blame you for a moment, cherry.” I started stroking her hair again and she sighed.

Twilight felt up my arm while I was doing stuff. “Rub my ears? Please?”

I did as she asked and she sighed. “I’m sorry I made today so rough for you. If I’d handled the Rainbow thing better-”

“She’s violent and stupid.” Twilight interrupted. “It’s really hard to see why I’m even friends with her right now.”

“She has her good moments.” I meekly replied. They’re few and far between, but they exist.

“Rainbow nearly hit you and she did hit me. The girls and I need to have the same talk we had with Applejack, but with her. Dear Celestia, is that mare a bucking hypocrite!” Twilight snarled.

I stopped caressing her ears and had her sit up so I could give her a kiss. Twilight returned it vigorously and pouted when we stopped. “Calm down, Twilight. You pride yourself on your rational thinking, so take yourself out of the equation and look at it like this: Rainbow’s been making mistakes, but there was still something in her that made you want to be friends with her in the first place. I don’t see it, but I’m sure you do-”

“Not right now. That cunt bucking hit me!” Twilight growled.

Kisses weren’t working. “Alright, then we’re coming up with a gameplan: We have the girls talk to Rainbow, yourself excluded for the time being, and we let our friends handle this one. I want every bone in her body broken and you don’t want to look at her, so we’re going to avoid doing those things, okay?”

Twilight worked her jaw. “I think we should be through with Rainbow. All she ever-”

I kissed again, hoping that the magical properties would get her mind off of it, but she pulled away. “I’m serious, Max. If Rainbow isn’t willing to listen to reason, then she’s not worth being around.”

“I’m honestly disappointed in you for saying that, Twilight. You sound like me.” I said sadly.

She looked away. “It’s how I feel.”

“I know, but Rainbow is still your friend-”

“No, she’s not. Start getting letters written out to the girls because I’m calling a meeting.” She paused a moment and sighed. “Please do that. I’m sorry for trying to order you around, I’m just upset.”

I hugged her. “I know, cherry. I’m not going to hold it against you. I’ll grab some paper and a pen; you go grab some wine and have a glass or find my pipe and smoke a bowl. You need to calm down.”

Twilight teleported my bowl and her own box of herb into her hands. After seeing that it was empty, I gave her her my last box of the first plant I’d cut down and she took a hit before passing it to me. We finished four bowls before Twilight mellowed out enough to not be livid at the mention of Rainbow, so we finally headed downstairs and surprised Trixie while she was drawing a picture of Orchid. Her infatuation made me smile and I asked how her date went, and she told me that she hadn't gone on it yet. I checked my pocket watch and saw that it was only six, so I asked Twilight if she minded that Trixie stick around for the meeting. She agreed since Rainbow had started all of this nonsense with Trixie in the first place, so it was only fair that she get to have a say in what went on.

I got the notes written out and Twilight decided to have some wine. Granted, she used wine to chase down a few shots of my formerly favourite bourbon, but she still drank it, so fuck you. Fluttershy showed up first with Applejack, then Pinkie and Rarity. With the gang all in my house, we opened the conversation with what had went down since I’d only mentioned that Twilight was calling a meeting in my notes. Applejack was the first to point out that we should wait for Rainbow if we were going to have a meeting, but Twilight told her that the meeting was about Dash in the first place. Twilight continued on with the story and only didn’t really leave much out. Where she forgot the specific phrasing of something, I helped her along since she was a little drunk at this point and I had to explain that I’d been trying to calm Twilight down before they’d all gotten here.

Applejack took her hat in one hand and ran a hand through her hair. “Alright, so what you’re tellin’ us is that Rainbow, the most loyal pony out there, has now thrown punches at two of our friends? I know it’s a little off topic, but doesn’t that make her one heck of a hypocrite since she was so up in arms about me hurtin’ Max twice?”

Twilight threw her hands up. “I said that!”

I put my hands on her shoulders since I was standing behind her. “Easy, tiger. Let’s hear what everyone has to say first.”

Rarity coughed after a moment of silence. “It seems to me as though Rainbow Dash needs the same talk we had with Applejack.”

Fluttershy nodded her agreement. “To think that she’d hit Twilight of all ponies…”

Pinkie shook her head. “Dashie’s always been stubborn and feisty, but that doesn’t excuse her. I can’t believe she refuses to see that she’s wrong!”

“Stubbornness has a way of blinding ponies. Trixie knows she had to nearly die for her to learn that being stubborn isn’t always a good thing.” The blue woman added.

Applejack looked at her. “So what do you make of this, Trixie?”

“Trixie cannot say. Trixie hasn’t known Rainbow Dash long enough to see any of her good qualities yet, so she will withhold judgement.”

“Smart mare. Unlike somepony.” Twilight muttered bitterly.

I squeezed her shoulders. “Try not to dwell on it, cherry. Trust me, I know you’re upset-”

“She bucking hit me!”

“I know that, but being angry isn’t going to solve anything. You need to keep a level head right now, Twilight. Maybe you should sleep on it and-”

“I’m still going to be mad when I wake up-”

I took my hands off of her shoulders, put my fingers in my mouth and put them in her ears. “Ew! What was that!?” She cried, trying to clean her ears out.

“That was me trying to get you to use your ears instead of your mouth. Stop interrupting me.” I said firmly.

Twilight turned around and stuck her tongue out at me and I replaced my hands. “As I was saying: You’re angry and angry words end friendships. You’re listening about as much as Rainbow was, so stop being like her and be like Twilight.”

“I’m just surprised you didn’t hurt her for hurting Twilight.” Rarity said. “The old Max would have punched Rainbow Dash until he was tired of it.”

“You’re forgettin’ that Rainbow pushed him way past that point, Rares. I’ve only been to that point once and the only thing that stopped me from breakin’ the mare I was fightin’ was Big Mac pullin me off of her. It’s like you see stuff in a whole different light, and the rest of the world just don’t matter no more. You just wanna hurt the pony that hurt your loved one.” Applejack explained.

I nodded. “I was going to straight up kill Rainbow Dash, but that would have horrified Twilight. That’s the only reason that woman is still alive right now.”

Rarity stared at me for a moment. “...How are you feeling now?”

“I’m going to break the hand she hit Twilight with, regardless of what decision we come to.” I declared.

Twilight reached up and grabbed my own hands. “And you were planning on telling me this when exactly?” She turned and raised a brow at me.

“As I was leaving to go track Rainbow down shortly after this meeting.” I stated.

“Max,” The girls chorused. Twilight didn’t say anything.

They looked between themselves and Pinkie spoke up first. “I agree with Max. If somepony laid a hoof on the pony I love, I’d break it.”

The girls, including Twilight, stared at her. Applejack had something to say. “Alright, the three of ya don’t need to be nowhere near Dash any time soon”

“Agreed.” Rarity said quickly.

“S-S-Same here…” Fluttershy added.

“Trixie knows you have done worse, but you consider Rainbow Dash a friend, Max.”

“She stopped being my friend when she hit Twilight. She’s either going to have to get from Ponyville to my house on her knees, or she's having her hand broken. It’s set in stone.” I said.

Applejack, Rarity, and Fluttershy all traded a look, but Applejack was the spokesperson this time. “We get that you’re mad, sugarcube, we really do-”

Twilight cut in. “What you don’t understand is that Max is talking about something he calls a ‘blood grudge’. When he says something is set in stone, it’s happening. Rainbow’s either getting here on her knees or she’s paying her debt in blood.”

I nodded. “What Twilight said.”

“I think our best bet is to tell Rainbow to start crawling.” Pinkie said softly.

Applejack glared at me. “Two wrongs don’t make a right.”

“I’m not trying to make a right. Vindication isn’t about making things right, it’s about making sure your message is clear. My message is that hurting Twilight is the fastest way to getting fucked up.”

Fluttershy put a hand on Applejack’s arm. “I think Pinkie’s right. If we don’t want Max to hurt her, I think Rainbow’s going to have to do what he said.”

Rarity huffed. “I am not going to let that happen. Regardless of the circumstances-”

I stared at her, making her stop mid sentence and swallow. “A-As I was saying…” She trailed off and looked to Applejack for help.

Applejack nodded. “I get what you’re tryin’ to say, Rares. Rainbow’s been messin’ up lately, but that ain’t no reason to hurt her over it or try and humiliate her.”

I turned my gaze to Applejack. “So what do you do if a full grown stallion punts Apple Bloom across a room?”

She met it readily. “I kick his tail in and send him cryin’ to his momma. Twilight ain’t your sister, Max.”

“You’re right. She’s not. I’ve never had a blood sibling, but I do know that my love for Twilight runs deeper than any other I’ve ever had. Mo one puts their hands on my cherry. I don’t give a damn if it’s Celestia or fucking Luna themselves, Shit is getting wrecked.”

Twilight tapped my hand while Applejack and I had a staring contest. “So what happened to letting our friends handle this?”

“I never said I wasn’t going to fuck her up for punching you.” I pointed out.

She shrugged. “Maybe I’ve just been spending too much time around you, but I get it. Girls, if you can convince me to not be mad at Rainbow, I’ll ask Max to not break her hand.”

Applejack leaned back in her chair and let out a frustrated breath. “How are we gonna get through to you when you haven’t said a darn thing about Max not goin’ after her!? You want Rainbow hurt to, and by the looks of it, her apology didn’t mean squat to ya!”

“I could’ve forced Rainbow to apologize or I could have ripped her limb from limb. There really weren’t any choices there.” I said.

“Why even call this meeting if you’re just going to go hurt her!?” Rarity exclaimed.

“Max didn’t call the meeting. He just told you that I was calling the meeting.” Twilight reminded.

Applejack and Rarity groaned. Applejack leaned back further and slid her hands down her face while Rarity buried her face in her hands on the table. Fluttershy coughed a couple times to get our attention. “W-What if I give Rainbow the option right now? I’m not the fastest pony, but I can get to her house before Max can.”

Twilight gripped my hand and I got the message. I kept my face nice and placid while Applejack and Rarity practically shoved her out the door before returning to their seats. Applejack took point. “Alright, all in favor of Max hurtin’ Rainbow, raise your hand.”

My hand and Twilight’s stood alone. “Okay. All opposed?”

Applejack and Rarity’s hand went towards the ceiling while Pinkie and Trixie abstained. “Alright, so it’s dead even all three ways, except we know Fluttershy’s opposed. Max, I hate to play this card, but you’re seriously riskin’ losin’ the three of us as friends if you hurt Rainbow.”

“As friends, you should understand why he’s so mad. Max has said multiple times to everypony that he would kill whoever puts a hand or hoof on me. Rainbow’s getting off easy compared to what he was prepared to do.” Twilight pointed out.

“Look sugarcube, I know that, but Rainbow is our friend.” Applejack pleaded.

“Twilight, we know you’re upset now, but why don’t you give yourself a few days to cool off?” Rarity suggested.

“What you girls aren’t understanding is that Rainbow didn’t just hit Twilight, she punched their friendship in the soft spot. Rainbow’s supposed to be the most loyal person around and here she is turning on two of her friends within the same fucking week.” I said calmly.

Applejack and Rarity didn’t meet my eyes, so I continued. “What you’re ignoring is the bullshit I've put up with from Rainbow. The first thing she did when we met was attack me, the second major thing was that she tore my fucking house apart and never even apologized for it, then she has the nerve to disrespect myself and one of my guests in my home before trying to throw a punch at me, and to top off that little shit cake, she hit my goddamn Twilight.” I paused for a moment. “I know multiple Twilights, but this one’s mine.”

Twilight squeezed both of my hands. “When you look at it like that, you gave Rainbow a lot of chances.”

“I did, and she blew every second chance I gave her, so why don’t you girls tell me what you would do to the person who dissed you, fucked up your home and never paid for it, and hit your special some’pony’?” I asked.

Applejack sighed and Rarity closed her eyes. “We get what you’re sayin’, Max. Rares, we might as well try Twilight.”

Rarity opened her eyes and looked to my lover. “Twilight, if our years of friendship have meant anything to you, don’t let Max do this.”

“Easy for you to say. The last time Rainbow hit you, it was an accident, but if I recall correctly, you still stopped talking to her for a month. You said we should stop being friends with her. You said that someone as careless and inconsiderate as Rainbow Dash isn’t worth being around.” Twilight reminded.

Rarity shut up.

“So you’re just gonna throw years of friendship down the drain because she got mad and hit you once? Sugarcube, Rainbow and I fight like cats and dogs all the time-”

“Except the one time you two had a real fight, you had to apologize to her for cracking her teeth.” Twilight said flatly.

“And she let it go!” Applejack threw her hands toward Twilight.

Twilight gave her a bored look. “After you sucked up to her for two weeks. May I remind you that when Rainbow hit you, you said it was funnier than it was painful? I’m not built like you, Applejack. It hurt.”

Pinkie waved a hand, her hair completely straight. “Rainbow still hasn’t forgiven me for sending a dick shaped cake to her while her dad was in town and that was years ago. She hit me for that.”

Everyone looked at her. “Pinkie, darling, why did you never tell us?” Rarity asked, shocked.

“Because I still want to hurt her for it. Rainbow has pulled some serious nonsense, and I know I don’t have much room to talk there, but at least I don’t go around sucker punching ponies because I’m upset.” Pinkie shook her head.

Applejack made an embittered noise. “So ya just been lettin’ that wound fester all this time!?”

Pinkie shrugged. “She never bothered to apologize for it, even when I tried bringing it up to her. Rainbow doesn’t like to see that she’s wrong.”

Applejack banged her head on the table. “That’s. Not. A. Good. Rea-son.”

“If she won’t see that she’s wrong on her own, then why would she when other ponies try to tell her? She and Gilda were friends for a reason.” Pinkie said quietly.

Rarity gasped. “Rainbow Dash is not Gilda!”

“You’re right. Gilda never hit anyone, no matter how mad she was.” I said.

Rarity stood up abruptly and left the room, but I didn’t hear her leave the house. She came back and sat down after a moment to cool off. “Max, if I may, could I request a glass of wine?”

“Do you want something stronger to go with it?” I asked.

“If she don’t, I do.” Applejack said, face down on the table.

“Then I’ll be right back.”

I wandered down to my cellar and started looking through my shit. I found some of the Local Special that I still had leftover, but it didn’t seem like a good time to make anyone trip balls, so I grabbed the Zap Apple Jack, a bottle of something clear, and some white wine. When I went upstairs, the girls were all doing shots with the bourbon I’d left up there from when I was trying to calm Twilight down. I handed Rarity the wine and a glass, so she poured herself some before I handed some vodka to her. She filled the rest of the glass and slammed it down in one go like a champ. Applejack told me to save the Zap Apple Jack for a happy time and started chugging the bourbon because she’s an actual savage. Twilight asked if we could smoke a little more since she didn't want to drink and Pinkie joined us in partaking of the Devil’s lettuce. Trixie cooled her heels and just had a glass of the red wine I'd brought up from earlier.

While we were drinking, Fluttershy came back a little sweaty and mildly exhausted. Once we got her sat down and poured her a drink, she delivered her news. “Rainbow just wants you to break her hand.” She said softly.

Applejack started in on the bourbon again and finished a quarter of it. “Stupid mare!”

Rarity put her head down. “I think I’m going to be ill.”

“So when does she want to do it? Did she say?” I asked.

“She said she wants Twilight to do it...” Fluttershy replied.

Twilight shrugged. “She doesn’t deserve a choice in the matter.”

“Aww come on! At least do the job yourself!” Applejack groaned.

“Twilight never said a word about doing it herself. I’m the only one who’s talking about doing a damned thing, so I’m pretty sure I should be the one to do it.” I stated.

Rarity and Applejack just groaned again. Fluttershy lifted her hand. “...Are you really going to risk estranging three of your friends-”

“We covered that one, darling. Twilight shut us down.” Rarity sighed.

“...And you just let her?” Fluttershy asked incredulously.

“So you’ve never been betrayed by or had Rainbow pull bullshit on you?” I asked.

“No! Never!” Fluttershy protested.

Twilight made a disdainful noise. “You mean like when she got two of your birds killed and never told you about it? Like how whenever you hint that you know it was her who got Mocky Mocky and Falco eaten by that one condor, she lies and won’t fess up?”

Fluttershy’s face dropped. “Oh.”

“Yeah. Oh.” Twilight said softly.

“Trixie sees that you all have grievances or have had them with Rainbow in the past. Trixie thinks you should not simply let these things go unspoken if you really are friends.”

Twilight squeezed my hand and I tapped her shoulder once. One barely audible pop alter, Rainbow was on the floor and all eyes were on her. She took one look at me and froze. “So, Rainbow, it seems like you’ve pulled some shit with two of your friends other than Twilight. We’re going to talk about that before we get to the main event.”

Rainbow turned to Twilight and Applejack and Rarity stumbled over to her. “We ain’t gonna let you just hurt Rainbow in front of us!” Applejack shouted.

“Are you truly such a barbarian!?” Rarity yelled.

Rainbow sighed and stepped around them. “I might as well face the music while it’s playing. What ‘bullshit’ are we talking about?”

Pinkie piped up first. “Do you remember giving me a black eye after I sent you that cake while your dad was in town?”

Rainbow glared at her. “Yeah, I remember that. You deserved that.”

Pinkie glared right back. “You told me yourself that he never even saw it and that you still ate it.”

“Like it or not, you should’ve apologized for hitting Pinkie.” Fluttershy said.

“She sent me a dick cake with my dad around!” Rainbow objected.

“But did I ever attack you? Did I walk into your home and hit you when I saw you?” Pinkie spat.

Rainbow turned her eyes back to Pinkie. “I’m not apologizing for that!”

Applejack stumbled back to her seat and laid her head on the table. “Seriously Dash, you’re not helpin’ your case at all here. You were out of line.”

“What? So you’re all just going to gang up on me now!?”

“Actually, I would shut the fuck up and apologize to Rarity and Applejack because they’ve spent the last half an hour or so trying to get me to not break your hand.” I said calmly.

Rainbow didn’t dare look at me. “I’m sorry.” She said angrily.

“And those were just more pointless words added to the pile.” Twilight said drily.

I nodded. “Yup. Fluttershy, your turn.”

Fluttershy looked at her hands. “...Rainbow… Do you know what happened to Mocky Mocky and Falco?”

Rainbow’s eyes shifted around the room. “You know?”

“...I’ve known since a week after it happened. A lot of the animals that were there from two years ago still hate you.”

“Fluttershy…” Rainbow took a deep breath. “I’m sorry I lied to you about that, it’s just… How was I supposed to tell you that I got two of your animals killed because I found a good spot to fly?”

“...You could’ve confessed when I brought it up. I gave you so many chances…” Fluttershy buried her face in her hands and started crying.

Twilight was by her side in an instant, soon followed by Rarity and Applejack. “I know your Element isn’t honesty, but lyin’ to a pony you’re supposed to be loyal to is just messed up, Dash. And so is hittin’ ponies you’re supposed to be friends with.” Applejack turned to face her.

Rainbow didn’t have a leg to stand on. “...If it helps, I’m sorry for hitting you, Twilight.”

“It really doesn’t.” Twilight responded crisply. “I hope you learn your lessons after this.”

I looked at Rainbow. “I believe it’s about that time. Twilight? If you would send us to about… Let’s say about a good fifteen minute walk away from the hospital.”

Rainbow’s eyes sparkled, so I added, “If you try to fly there, I’m breaking your wings. I don’t mean crack, I mean shatter.”

She gulped and nodded, though her eyes still wouldn’t meet mine. Twilight wasted no more time and sent us off to my desired destination. Once we got there, Rainbow held out her left and told me to ‘Just get it over with already’, so I wrapped her hand in my tentacle and applied a good amount of force to it. What she wasn’t expecting was me to know that she was right handed and that Twilight had told us that she’d punched her with her right hand. Rainbow’s face bloomed in confusion before it quickly contorted into anguish. All she could do was croak and fall to her knees while I watched. Noir just told me that while I was justified, it was still a terrible thing to do.

Like I could feel pity for her.

Rainbow spent about ten minutes rocking back and forth, clutching her ruined hand and sobbing. Once she could breathe, she asked, “How could you do this to another pony!?”

I knelt in front of her. “When you hit Twilight, I was going to kill you then and there. Magic can fix your hand, so suck it up before I cut it off. “

Rainbow glared at me through tear filled eyes. “I should’ve known you were a monster when you said you killed those Gryphons!”

“That’s not going to change anything. I am who I am, and there’s nothing that you of all people can say to make me feel bad about that.” I said emotionlessly.

She let out a pain filled shriek and I rolled my eyes before hefting her onto her feet by her left arm. She cried out while I was doing that, but she should have been grateful that I was leading us toward the hospital. We garnered a lot of stares while we were walking toward the hospital and once we cleared town, Rainbow had more to say.

“I never should’ve saved your life! Things were fine before you came here!”

I stopped her and stood in front of her. “I died in your arms, Dash. I was dead when you got me to the hospital. You never saved my life in the first place: You carried my corpse from Applejack’s farm to the hospital.”

“That’s a lie! The Princesses-”

“The Princesses themselves told me that they had to bring me back to life with magic, just like when I died in Fluttershy’s house.” I started leading the way to the hospital and she hobbled on, gasping as every other step jarred her hand.

“Doesn’t the fact that I tried count for anything!?”

“It does. That’s a part of the reason you’re still alive, Rainbow Dash.” I said casually.

She grit her teeth and stopped talking until we got to the hospital. Once there, we were seen almost immediately by a nurse named Redheart until Rainbow was actually seen by a doctor. Once they gave her some pain killing magic, the doctors and whatnot had a looky loo at Rainbow and boy did I ever fuck her up Her breaks weren’t as bad as the ones Applejack gave me the last time I was here, but they weren’t too far off. Still, after a few days of treatment in the hospital, Rainbow would be perfectly fine, though her hand would probably ache when it was particularly cold, though it wasn’t like I didn’t have the same problem with my own formerly broken bones on occasion.

Rainbow kept her mouth shut about what really happened, though whether it was because I was there or if she just didn't want people to know she’d gotten hurt willingly, I don’t really know. I do know, however, that Rainbow was a real trooper once the pain was manageable, though she wasn’t as big a twat to me as I was expecting her to be. Once we got a moment alone, Rainbow told me that she understood why I’d hurt her, even if she didn’t like it at all, and she even apologized to me for hitting Twilight. I accepted her apology since she’d already gone through her penance, but I did let her know that we were starting from rock bottom if she wanted to stay friends. Without pain clouding her mind, or maybe because she was doped up on magic, Rainbow agreed and we shook hands on it.

While I was waiting with Rainbow, the thing with Pinkie came up and I asked her why she’d been so upset about the dick cake. She told me that she just thought that it was inconsiderate and I pointed out that it was a lot more inconsiderate to punch someone for something that hadn't hurt you in the slightest. Rainbow got the point and resolved to apologize to Pinkie. She got the chance a lot sooner than she expected because the girls and Trixie showed up to see if she was doing alright. Rarity cried about the whole thing because she was a little drunk and Applejack apologized profusely for not being able to protect her from my scorn. Rainbow assuaged both of their worries by telling them that she hadn't even cried and that what I broke was fixable anyway. The ten or so minutes she spent on the ground told a different story, but I could appreciate the facade.

Twilight and Rainbow had a short talk and Twilight basically forgave Rainbow because she was willing to deal with my punishment, and Pinkie forgave her because she finally admitted that she was wrong. Fluttershy was still hurt, but she said that she forgave her, so all’s well that ends well I suppose. Trixie had been hanging out in the furthest corner of the room until Rainbow called her forward and apologized for being both a hypocrite and a twat when Trixie had first shown up. Trixie forgave her easily since she knew what it was like to have a healthy distrust of strangers, although her life in Ponyville was proving her distrust to be baseless so far. I reminded her that most people outside of Ponyville still sucked and she nodded her assent.

Nurse Redheart asked to have a word with me personally when she came back and checked up on Rainbow for some odd reason, so I had a quick chat with Twilight before joining the nurse in the hall just in case she was trying to get some fuck all up in her stuff. Twilight told me to stop thinking that everyone was trying to sleep with me and I pointed out that a lot of women wanted to, regardless of what she thought. My lover rolled her eyes and told me that it was fine if Redheart asked to sleep with me, but that I couldn’t cum inside her, so with that knowledge, I joined Redheart in the hall.

Now, Redheart was a pretty attractive mare, though that may have been her color scheme talking. She had a white coat and a light pink mane that reminded me of Fleur and her heart shaped face and posterior made me want to give her a shot, if that was what she wanted. The look on her face when I left the room told me that my hopes were pointless and the frown she was wearing told me that I was probably correct in assuming that she knew how Rainbow broke her hand.

“Excuse me, but you are Mr. Maximus, correct?” Redheart asked curtly.

“I sure am, love. What can I help you with?”

“I and Rainbow Dash’s doctor, Steady Hoof, are just wondering how she broke her hand so badly, but only her hand.” Redheart stared me down.

I lifted a brow. “Would you believe me if I told you she wanted to try taunting a creature of the Everfree?” I spent a month in the Everfree, and you could technically call me a creature.

“I wouldn’t.”

I shrugged. “Then I don’t know what to tell you.”

“I just have a hard time believing that Rainbow Dash managed to cause so much damage to herself.” Redheart crossed her arms.

Time for some acting. I narrowed my eyes and crossed my arms. “I really don’t like what you’re implying, Redheart. Spit it out or go do your job. Accusing me of shit isn’t going to get you anywhere.”

She folded her own arms. “Did you break her hand?”

“Why would I walk her here personally if I did? And if you don’t recall, Rainbow is the one who carried me here when I got hurt by Applejack, so unless you don’t think that counts for anything, you can go jam a needle into whichever cheek you want.”

She glared at me. “That’s not a no.”

I rolled my eyes. “Sure, I totally broke my friend’s hand. Are you satisfied, twat?”

She glared harder. “If you’re not going to tell me the truth, then I don’t see a reason to continue this conversation.”

“If you’d like to take it elsewhere so you can keep being a little shit, then let’s go.”

She jammed a finger into my chest. “I know what you did to Strawberry Petal. She told me that you're the pony who bruised her like that!”

I gave her a ‘Seriously?’ look. “Seriously? Did Strawberry not tell you that she asked me to do that to her?”

Redheart blinked. “What?”

“Yeah, you’re friend has some serious kinks. Ask her yourself if you don’t believe me, I’m not the type of person to just go around beating on people just because I feel like it. Strawberry wanted to be hurt, so I obliged within reason.”

The nurse just stared at me for a moment before turning to the wall and banging her head against it a few times. Once she was done with her nonsense, she picked her hat up and adjusted it. “That explains why she was so happy to show off those marks.”

I stepped closer and booped her nose. “See? You jumped to conclusions. Understandable conclusions, but you still came after me rather unpleasantly. That hurt my feelings.”

She sighed. “I’m sorry, Sir Maximus-”

“Call me Max, it’s less of a mouthful.”

She gave me a little smile. “Max then. I’m sorry Max, but the evidence was stacking against you.”

“I’ll be sure to lean away when it starts doing that again. You Ponies really like things to be cut and dry, don’t you?”

“I’m a Manehattan mare. I pay too much attention, unlike some of the Ponyville ponies.”

I nodded. “I understand. Just for the record, I really did break Rainbow Dash’s hand. She tried to put a couple of fingers in my bum and my cheeks just clenched so hard, I couldn’t help it.”

Redheart blushed bright and rosy. “Th-That’s not what happened!”

“Fine, she tried sticking her own fingers-”

Twilight opened the door and peered out. “I heard some shouting. Is everypony okay out here?”

Redheart fanned herself. “This stallion is just too much!”

Twilight beamed and stepped out, holding onto my arm. “He is most days, but he’s mine and I love him for it.”

“Aww, I love you too, cherry.” I kissed her forehead and she pouted, so I gave her a real kiss.

Redheart just shook her head. “I’m sure you have your hands full with him. If there’s nothing else, I have another patient I need to talk to.”

“You’re the one who started the conversation.” I said, pretending to be offended. “It’s only fair if I get to end it.”

Twilight whacked me. “What he’s actually saying is that he had fun talking to you.”

“No, what I’m actually trying to say is that I think my finger is a rectal thermometer and I need a nurse around to help me test my theory.” I said with a shit eating grin.

Redheart sent a mock glare my way. “You want to break that finger, feel free to try.”

“Is your arse that tight?” I asked gleefully.

Redheart blushed and cast a quick glance at Twilight. “I don’t think it’s wise to comment on that. Have a good day, you two, and let Rainbow know that she can leave in two more hours once we cast another long-term healing spell on her.”

Twilight squeezed my arm and smiled. “We’ll tell her, but I have some advice for you.” Redheart cocked her head. “If you’re breaking fingers when ponies do that, you should try relaxing a little.”

The look on Redheart’s face was priceless and I couldn’t stop fucking laughing. I was giggling even as I kissed Twilight and she was smiling, despite trying to return my kiss. “Okay, messing with ponies is kinda fun sometimes.”

“You did pretty well, cherry. I wasn’t expecting that from you.” I grinned and Twilight pulled me down to her level to kiss my cheek.

“I’ll have to keep it to a minimum so I keep surprising you.” Twilight lead me back into Rainbow’s room and we told everyone the good news.

Trixie had to leave for her date, so Rarity and Pinkie offered to show her the way to the establishment she was supposed to be meeting Orchid at. The three of them fucked off and Rainbow asked Twilight and myself if we were cool now. I gave her a thumbs up and reminded her of what I’d said earlier, but Twilight chastised me, though she didn’t tell me to change my ways. Rainbow accepted it for what it was and told Applejack to not be mad at me, so that was nice. Fluttershy maintained that I still shouldn’t have broken her hand, but Rainbow swatted her on the rear with her left hand and asked if she’d be willing to help her out for a while since she was down a hand. Fluttershy sent a Stare my way and I returned it with a Dark Magically charged one of my own, though I limited it enough so that it just made her uncomfortable to meet my gaze. I still had one Hell of a headache afterwards, so Fluttershy won that round.

I took Twilight back to her place and we did some light cuddling, though she asked me if I’d mind giving her a tummy rub while touching her ears. I was happy to do so and even stroked her horn on occasion, making her shiver in delight when I did. After about twenty minutes of some well deserved affection, Twilight let me know that we were going to have to go to her room to finish up and I stuck my head between her legs like she was a lonely business woman and her dog was me. Twilight reciprocated my attention with some of her own, though she told me that she’d started asking Fleur for tips so she could get up to her level. Needless to say, Twilight got fucking good after Fleur gave her two pages of blowjob notes, and I was quite glad for her newfound knowledge.

After Twilight showed and swallowed, we laid down for a night of decent sleep and I had her teleport a note onto my kitchen table for Trixie telling her that she would be on her own for dinner. Once we got that done, Twilight wanted to be my little spoon, so I cuddled up real close and waited until her breathing evened out to talk to Noir. She and I talked about what I did to Rainbow briefly and she applauded me for not making her hand unusable, but that was basically it for the important stuff. We watched The Avengers since I was a bit of a nerd and she instantly fell in love with Black Widow’s general badassery, though I was more of a fan of Iron Man for his snark and general lackadaisical bullshit. I suppose we ended up picking the people most like ourselves.

Once the movie was done, Noir offered to let me motorboat her and spread her arse cheeks for some rough anal. She’s asking me now to tell you that isn’t true, but if you’re not Twilight or Celestia, you shouldn’t be reading this anyway, so do a back flip into a dry pool. Preferably from the high dive.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I woke up with my knob nestled neatly in Twilight arse. It was nice. I put my chest against her back and let my soft breaths disturb the fur on the nape of her neck, though Twilight woke up soon enough. She sighed and held the hand that was on her stomach pressing up against me as my morning wood made itself known. I would have told her that I noticed her arse was filling out a bit more these days, but I was happy enough with the fact that I could now fit most of my shaft between her cheeks. It wasn’t like her stomach was getting larger, which confused me a bit, but I did notice that her breasts and bottom seemed to be growing and I was rather fond. I thought of a nice way to tell her about my observations.

“Cherry~” I murmured into her ear.

She sighed happily. “Yes, amour?”

I reached up and gently brushed her breast with my hand. “Are these getting bigger, or am I hallucinating again?”

Twilight took my hand and placed it where it belonged. “My bras have been feeling awfully tight lately. I’m not getting chubby, am I?”

“Not at all, and I rub your tummy often enough to know. You’re filling out a little and that’s all I’ve noticed.”

She wiggled her bottom against me delectably. “Is that getting bigger too?”

I gave her a single, slow thrust. “Pleasantly so. I’ve always liked your figure, but I do like you with a little more rear to go around.”

“What happens if it gets too big?” Twilight asked trying to turn around to face me.

“We stop wearing pants to bed.” I said simply.

She squeezed my hand, making me squeeze her in turn. “It’s nice to know that there’s no such things as too big for you. What do you say I turn you into Roxy and we go panty shopping today?”

I nestled my face into her neck. “Sounds lovely. It’s a shame we didn’t go with Trixie, but it’s not like I want to see whatever she gets. Or got. Whatever.”

“I don’t have anything to fear from Trixie, right?”

“Not at all. Trixie is like family and I don’t like incest.”

“Speaking of your family, how was Mother’s Day with Blueberry Tart? I should have asked sooner, but I kinda forgot.”

“It was nice. That’s when I spent an entire night talking to Trixie. She, Blue and I are kind of like a small family now.”

Twilight put my hand between her breasts. “That’s so sweet! Now you just need a dad and you’ll have a full one!”

I chuckled. “I was thinking about Onyx, actually. He seems like a good enough fellow.”

“He’d be a great choice.” Twilight said.

We laid there a bit longer until Twilight decided that it was time for us to get up and get our day started. She turned me into Roxy after showers were through and we wore the same outfit in different colors: A button down blouse with a skirt just above the knee and matching socks. I’d gone with dark grey while she went for her usual purple, and with that, I made breakfast for ourselves and Spike. I caught him staring at my arse while I was reaching for some pepper on a higher shelf and threw a spoon at him for ogling me. He said he was just staring off into space, but we both knew that it was some bullshit. I know Roxy looks good for being on the slim side, but I thought that he would be more interested in someone like Fluttershy or Applejack, both of whom have a bit more bounce to their bosom and bottom.

Twilight caught me throwing the spoon at Spike, but I didn’t rat on him. I figured I should take it as a compliment instead of being offended, so I did. Twilight took me to Blue’s shop so we could browse through some of her wearable wares. Blue was happy to see me and let me know by leaving her counter and giving Twilight and I hugs. We shot the breeze for a little bit and arranged our next meeting at my place, so it was officially my duty to let Trixie know that shit was happening. With that, since Blue didn’t have any other customers so early in the morning, she helped Twilight find the perfect cup size and whatnot for her new figure and I found a couple pairs of cute knickers that I made a mental note of. I’d have to take pictures and send them to Twilight or have her make copies for me while I modeled them for her. Either way.

We left Blue to her own devices and I took Twilight back to my place so we could play dress-up in our skivvies for a little bit. I showed her my scrapbook of my own nudes and ones I’d gotten from women she knew and that ended in sweet, sweet lesbian sex, so I considered it a morning well spent. Once we were finished, Twilight asked if I wanted to be changed back and I put it off for a little bit, though I did remember to have her copy Midnight Stroll and the Robbed Ruby Ring. She told me she would give it a read when she got home and left soon after so I could have a word with Trixie. It didn’t need to be in private, but Twilight still wanted us to have some time apart, so she got what she wanted.

I let Trixie know when we were supposed to have dinner with Blue and she told me that her date with Orchid had gone rather well. Trixie walked her home and received a kiss for her efforts and I applauded her style, though she did say that Orchid was a bit on the chatty side. I almost told her that it was just how women were before I realized that I was a woman, so I held my tongue and said that it was a good thing since it meant Orchid was a good person to have a conversation with. Trixie got a dreamy look on her face and agreed. With nothing else to talk about, I suggested that we go see if her house was done and she happily agreed, but as we were preparing to go walk over there, Mary sent me a message telling me that her house was done anyway and that she would be heading there shortly to meet up with us.

We were a lot closer, so I grabbed a glass of apple juice and had a drink before we headed out. That’s all that happened between the time we left and the time we got there, so shit was a little boring. Trixie and I filled the time by talking about Orchid, and once I got her started, it was a little hard to get her to stop. I wasn’t complaining at all, but Trixie could go on for days about the woman and only take breaks to snack or poo. Maybe both at the same time so she could make the most of her moments.

Mary arrived shortly and lead us through the house since she was familiar with the layout. All in all, it was a nice house that was large enough for two people with the occasional guest, though I wasn’t fond of the kitchen. I preferred the open layout of my own, but Trixie was in love with everything about the place since it was hers. Mary just smiled and I pointed out the things I liked so Trixie could gush some more about whatever it was that she liked, but she mostly just hugged me and thanked me for having the place built for her. We still had to fill the place with furniture, so that was the next thing we did, though Mary had to go back to work. I promised to stop by once I was finished with helping Trixie buy her crap, so with a mini date set, Trixie and I headed into town and stopped by a few local furniture shops to find some dope shit.

I paid for a couch, her bed, and a bed for the guest room, but she paid for the rest of her shit since she had the money. I also paid for the three teams of movers we had to hire since I wasn’t going to carry a single fucking thing and when we got back to her house, Trixie wisely got the big stuff out of the way first. She let me go meet up with Mary when we were about halfway through, so I totally ditched her and went to go get laid for the second time that day.

I walked back into town and strode into town hall like I owned the place. Strawberry beamed when she saw me and asked to have some of my time once I was finished with Mary, so I agreed and she dipped her hands below her desk, preparing herself. I noticed that her cheeks were still a darker shade from the last time we’d spent time together and that just made me think of all the new ways I’d come up with to brutalize her, especially after she’d painted me as some kind of terrible person to her friends.

I snapped out of it on my way to Mary’s office and didn’t bother knocking, though I didn’t see her anywhere. I heard some buzzing going on from behind her desk and closed the door softly so I could sneak up on her, and when I got around to her side, I saw why she wasn’t sitting with her hooves up like usual. Mary was giving herself a brutal arse fucking with a magical machine of some kind, so I just sat and watched. Machines really aren’t my kink, so there was no accumulation of moisture anywhere. Mary eventually realized she had an audience and I gave her a little wave, waiting for her to extricate her from her position.

She didn’t/couldn’t move. “G-G-Get Th-Th-This Th-Th-Thing-”

“Get it off?” I asked.

She whimpered her response and I dragged her from under her desk and unstrapped the horrid thing. “Thank you so much…” She practically sobbed.

“Always make sure you have a failsafe, sweetie.” I patted her cheek and held her head in my bosom while she collected herself.

“I didn’t think it would just keep going!” She held onto my arm.

“That’s why you don’t use machines like that to do a job you can do yourself. God forbid you get a sybian or something and can’t get off.”

“My sybian stops!” She moaned.

“...Alright then. I’m guessing you’ve had enough for one day.”

She suddenly jerked away from me. “Perish the thought! Give me a moment to go get cleaned up and I’ll be right with you, dear.”

Mary shakily got to her feet and almost immediately fell over, but I caught her before she could hit the ground. I grabbed a towel from her usual hiding place for sex toys (one of many filing cabinets) and had her bend over so I could wipe off the ludicrous amount of lube from her cheeks and rosebud. She told me that she’d had to keep the thing well lubricated for fear of it going dry and actually hurting her, but I didn’t need the explanation. She twitched at my touch, but when I didn’t give her anymore time and started slipping her lower lips some tongue, she didn’t tell me to stop. I lapped up Mary’s citrus-like nectar and ate her through another orgasm that was intensified when I fit three fingers into her rear. I didn’t just shove them in all at once, mind you, but it’s not like she needed any extra preparation after the savagery she’d just put herself through. Mary gave as good as she got, though she was a little liberal with the application of her tongue inside of my folds. When she tried to fit more than the tip in, I warned her against it and she gently bit my clit to make up for her intrusion. I nearly came on the spot, but Mary is well versed in the ways of teasing, so she was saving up for a big one.

After nearly thirty minutes of infuriating toying, Mary finally let me have what I wanted and that was fucking lovely. I asked if she wanted to go again and she told me that she was a bit tuckered out, so I helped her to her feet and carried her off to the restroom so she could let out what she’d been holding since she’d put that horrible machine on herself. With Mary taken care of and my own legs a little troublesome, I returned to Strawberry and told her that she’d better get her arse somewhere private unless she wanted to get me arrested for the things I was about to do to her. Her face lit up and she let loose a stream of insults, though she still called me ‘Mistress’ when she finished. Thankfully, I wouldn’t have to slap her around with my bare hands since I’d borrowed some toys from Mary so we could do things properly. I had a cane, a paddle, a little electric wand, a thing that reminded me of a Chinese flesh scrape, and Strawberry provided some hard steel handcuffs from her own personal collection.

Once we were in a private room near the back of the building, I surveyed Strawberry. “You know, other than being a filthy fucking whore, you don’t look half bad. I can’t say I’d risk rotting my cock off by sticking it into you, but I might give your arse a try some time.”

Strawberry gave me a mischievous smile. “Mary has a strap-on she wouldn’t mind letting some pitiful mare like yourself use for a little while.”

I stepped bit closer and grabbed her by the chin. “And you’re wasting time by talking about it? Go get it and we’ll see if I think you’re worth using it on.”

Her eyes lit up and she practically skipped out of the room, and when she returned, she was holding it in an inconspicuous box. I set it down on the table and had her hike her skirt up for me before I put the handcuffs on her. Her pink cotton panties were already drenched and I hadn't done a thing to her yet, so I thought we would start with the cane. I picked it up and gave one of her thighs a good swing, making her give me an alluring look.

“Bend over, hands on the table. Stick your arse out and count.” I commanded.

Strawberry did as I asked and I gave her pussy a stroke with the tip of the cane, making her knickers stick to her folds. I decided to start off small and work my way up, so I made my first swing to the back of her thighs, the blow making a cringe worthy whistle as it traveled.

“One!” Strawberry moaned.

I figured that I would cover her arse in welts, so I aimed for the top of her posterior and swung again.

“Two!” She cried, ecstatic.

Three more blows passed, each one getting a little harder. At the five count, I figured it was a good time for her to remove her panties. “Oi! Slut!” I rapped her bottom twice with the cane. “Take those off.”

Strawberry’s pretty good about following orders, so she did, returning to the position I’d told her to get in without any hesitation. Her lips were plump and full, ripe for a taste if I so desired. I stroked her sex with the tip of the cane and gave it a lick. She tasted like I’d expected her to, but I wasn’t terribly fond of strawberries, so I made sure the next two swings hit her most tender area. She came on the second swing and I roughly yet carefully jammed a finger into her honeypot. It surprised me that she was only slightly less tight than Twilight, and when I worked my fingers in a little deeper, I felt that she was actually a virgin.

I asked if she was even interested in normal sex and she told me that she really wasn’t, so I shrugged and carried on. Once her arse was littered with welts that raised her fur, I had other plans. “Get up and strip.” I commanded simply.

She looked back and grinned at me with half lidded eyes. “Or what, Mistress?”

I don’t take no back talk, so I pressed my thumb against the switch for extra leverage and gave her my most savage swing yet as though I was trying to swing right through her. The cane my her arse and she came again, trembling as she rode the orgasm. Once I’d given her what she wanted, Strawberry followed my orders and stood in up straight. I walked around her and slapped her arse one good time.

“Not much jiggle there. I guess you can only be a proper slut if you have the right body for it.” She giggled and I continued my little tour of her body, stopping at her breasts.

They weren’t as large as Applejack’s, but they were still a nice, abusable pair of C-Cups that I wanted to fondle. I hefted one and wrenched her teat, making her gasp and look at me with hunger in her gaze. After taking the cane to the the underside on them one good time, I let my hands wander to her lower lips.

“Sit on the table and spread your legs.” I demanded.

“Yes Mistress!” She hopped onto the table and winced, but she still spread ‘em nice and wide for me.

Since my cane had seen plenty of use already, I figured that she only needed a couple of swings to each thigh, but I couldn’t resist giving her a comparatively light swat to her sex. Strawberry had the most powerful orgasm I’d ever seen her have, so while she was struggling to keep her legs open, I gave her a slightly harder one and dodged out of the way, just in case she was a squirter on rare occasions. I was proven correct as she sprayed the area I’d been standing in with her juices.

I put the cane down for the time being and checked the handcuffs. They hadn't shifted at all, so I grabbed the wand and waited while Strawberry twitched and jolted as I let my hands explore the markings I’d made. The area just above her folds already had a welt forming, so I pressed down lightly and she moaned. I took that as a perfectly acceptable cue to start using the wand, so I turned it on to the lowest wattage and tapped her thigh with it. Strawberry gave me a look, so I turned it up to medium and she let out an adorable ‘eep!’, so I continued, heading further down with each tap, alternating sides randomly.

I decided to crank it to its maximum wattage and it’s low crackling filled the room. Strawberry raised her head to identify the source of the noise, but before she could get a good look, I let the wand hover near her clit and saw that the fur that wasn’t drenched stood straight up. She nearly came just from proximity, but I kept a steady hand and took the wand away, having a seat on the table right next to her. I turned the wattage down so I wouldn’t give her a fucking heart attack or something and tapped on of her nipples with the tip. They were already rock hard, but her areolas seemed to rise along with the nubs until they gave her breasts two little peaks. I toyed with her breasts for a little while because it was amusing to me.

Strawberry gave me a pleading look after three minutes. “Please, Mistress!”

I raised a brow. “Please what?”

“Please use that on my marehood!” She begged.

I rolled my eyes and reached back to tap the welt I’d touched before. Strawberry didn’t get the release she was seeking, but I’d already given her plenty of climaxes so far, so orgasm denial was on my list of shit to do. I did stop toying with her breasts, though I only did so to remove my panties and skirt so I could sit on her face. While I was in the process of explaining exactly what would happen if she dared to stick her tongue inside of me, Mary popped her head in.

We stared at each other for a moment. “You need something, sweetie?”

“...Can I watch?” Mary asked shyly.

I rolled my eyes and twisted so I wasn’t on Strawberry’s face anymore. “Do you mind? She’s your boss after all.”

“Mistress, I don’t give a single buck.”

I scooted around so I could slap her. “Watch your language; there’s a real ‘mare’ present.”

“Yes Mistress.” She smiled.

I rolled my eyes again and went back to what I was doing: toying with her breasts while she lapped at the dampness between my legs. I didn’t particularly get off to causing pain, but it was arousing in some sick, twisted way and I figured that I might as well get something out of the experience while it was happening. With the wand in hand, I tortured her breasts while Mary watched on in mild intrigue until I told her to come over. I poked one of her breasts with the wand at the current voltage and she winced when I did, though she spent a little longer groping herself than I thought necessary. I continued my work on Strawberry, but I just wasn’t getting the results I wanted from from her tongue, so I sighed and hopped off before replacing my panties, using Strawberry’s arm to make sure I didn’t make them any wetter than they already were.

My personal punching bag still had her legs spread nice and wide, so I used the paddle and put some force behind each swing. Once she’d had a small orgasm, I picked the wand back up and touched it into the insides of her lips, spreading them so I could reach the soft flesh within. She nearly squirted on me again, but I’d been prepared for her to cum when I did that, so I just stayed out of the way. After turning the voltage back up the the maximum, I didn’t wait for her to stop cumming when I touched the wand to her clit. She shrieked and I glanced over to see Mary wincing, but all Strawberry could do was lay limply on the table. I figured she’d had enough for the time being, so I hopped back onto the table next to her. Her eyes were closed and when I lifted one of her lids, all I could see were the whites of her eyes, but she was still twitching, so I was pretty sure that she was alive.

“I-Is she okay?” Mary asked.

“Probably. I think I may have broken her a little bit. She’s done a lot of cumming today.” I said casually.

“Are you sure we shouldn’t call somepony?”

“She’ll snap out of it when she’s ready. We should probably get her dressed, however.” I picked up her knickers and checked the size on them. “I’m going to go and grab her some new livery once we get her blouse and skirt on. This room never gets used, right?”

“Rarely enough. It smells an awful lot like her in here now.” Mary commented.

I shrugged before unlocking her handcuffs and picking her bra up from the floor, shifting her limp form around so I could get the straps on. Once that was done, I got her blouse done and Mary handled her skirt, and once she was decent enough, we moved her away from the wet spot on the table and Mary went to go find some things to go clean up with while I went to go do what I said I would. I came back while Mary was mopping up Strawberries juices and I licked her clean so she wouldn’t stain the new panties I’d gotten for her. Once I got them on her, I helped Mary with the mess and we threw the towels in a bin so we could find a place to put Strawberry until she recovered.

Mary actually had a couch with a folding bed in one of the many rooms of the Town Hall, just in case she ever needed to sleep and rise at work, so that’s where we put Strawberry for the time being. I slapped her cheeks a couple of times to check and see she would wake up, but the poor woman was practically comatose, so I stayed with her for the extra hour it took for her to wake up.

Strawberry Petal lifted a hand to her head and moaned. She shifted her legs and shivered hard, though that made me want to see if I could get her to cum from mostly platonic touches. “Where am I? She asked hoarsely to no one in particular.

I ran a hand over her tummy and she sighed. “You’re in Mary’s recreation room. Do you remember what happened?”

She was silent for a moment. “I think I came so hard I blacked out.”

I reached over and squeezed one of her breasts, sending her into another bout of trembling. “That’s pretty much what happened. Things got a little scary for awhile.”

“How long was I out?”

I checked the clock in the room. “About two hours. You’re welcome to stay here if you don’t think you can make it home. I’d carry you, but you seem pretty sensitive.”

“I think I’ll stay here for now. Next time-”

“We’re not doing that twice.” I told her gently.

She gave me a shocked look. “What?”

“Welts fade, bruises heal, but shit like that can cause permanent damage if we’re not careful.”

She pouted for a moment until sighing. “I guess I understand. I thought you didn’t care about me.”

“I’m not trying to kill you here. I understand that you get off on having your limits pushed, but there really are boundaries I refuse to cross. I’ll fuck you until you’re a sobbing mess or until you ask me to stop-”

“Not happening.”

“Right. The point remains that I care about your overall safety. This wouldn’t be fun if I didn’t.”

Strawberry was quiet again. “...That’s a pretty good point. I’m pretty sure I like it when you bring out the hard stuff because I know I’m still actually safe.”

I reached back to stroke her thigh and she moaned, so I hiked her skirt up a bit and started rubbing the inside because I could. “I suggest you take some time off to recuperate. Something like this isn’t to be taken lightly.”

“F-Finish me off one last time? Please?” She asked.

“I just went out and got you new panties, so no. When you can move your arms again, do it yourself.”

“You’re already ruining them!”

“That’s your own fault. Stop dripping and start sleeping.”

She sighed. “Yes Mistress. Can you get me some water or something?”

I helped her sit up and got the glass I’d known she would want when she woke up. “Way ahead of you. I suggest you drink slowly if you don’t want to be ill all over yourself.”

Strawberry’s shaky hand griped the glass and she sipped it. “You know, I didn’t really take you for the nurturing type.”

“I’m a Royal Operative. There’s a lot of sides to me.”

She smiled and looked into her glass. “Thank you, Mistress.”

“No problem. I can’t abuse you all the time.”

“It just makes it a little confusing. I don’t see how you hurt a pony then look after them, but I guess I should just be grateful that you care.”

I patted her thigh and she closed her eyes. “Exactly. Now shut up and focus on getting some rest.”

She nodded and I got up to go home. Between helping Trixie furnish her home, shagging Mary, and abusing Strawberry, my afternoon was gone and I needed to get home for dinner with my family, so I kicked up some dust on my way to Twilight’s and asked her to change me back once I’d freed myself of my pesky female clothes. Twilight may or may not have admired my form as I dressed, but that’s neither here nor there, so suck it.

After a few parting kisses with Twilight, I picked up some extra groceries from the shops before they could close for the day and got home, but Trixie and Blue were already inside when I came in. I apologized for being late, but Trixie had already inadvertently snitched me out for hooking up with Mary. While I cooked, Blue hounded me like a proper Mum for sleeping with one of Onyx’s paramours, but I told her that Twilight was doing her too and she stopped her nonsense. Trixie tried telling me to just stick to Twilight, but I told her that my lover herself had given me permission to do whatever the fuck I felt like within reason, so that’s what I did and do. Trixie and Blue talked to me some more about scaling back my level of fuckery, but I told them that Twilight was happy enough to indulge in certain ways that I didn’t feel like I was at liberty to share. Namely, her voyeuristic streak.

After explaining that I’d asked Twilight whether or not she felt threatened or if she was just generally uncomfortable with me picking partners more times than I could count, they finally relented. Both of them knew about my status as a lie detector, so they trusted my words well enough, though Blue still maintained that I should stick to one woman since I was committed to her. I argued that Twilight’s will dictated who I slept with and when, and that she’d stopped me from sleeping with women that I’d rather wanted to lay multiple times. Hell, I still wasn’t sure if I’d ever be able to sleep with Fleur again, and when questioned about who she was, I explained that she was one of three women I knew that could keep up with my half-retarded libido, and that she was probably the second best out of the three. I got a couple of glares for that until I explained that it was rather high praise and that the only reason Twilight wasn’t on that list was because she still had her virginity.

Blue asked me how I’d been with her for months but hadn't ever actually had sex with her and I explained that, while we’d considered it, we decided to wait until marriage to seal the deal. I told them Twilight already had my cherry as Roxy, and she was content enough with only being with women until estrus came around. I was scolded for talking about estrus in general, but I pointed out that I’d lost my virginity as a female and had spent about a month as one as this point, so I considered myself a little genderfluid at this point, as stupid as I find the term. Blue relented after some convincing, but Trixie still wasn’t about to talk about estrus with her brothersister, so I called her transphobic and she didn’t know what that meant. Hell, no one knew what that meant in Equestria, so I guess the meaning is lost to time and space, though I acknowledge the fact that I’m a bit of a hypocrite in that regard. To be honest, I just never found the whole Roxy thing to be that big of an issue since I never put any thought into it. I’m still not going to, just to save myself a headache.

The rest of dinner was nice once we got off the topic of my relationship and moved onto Trixie’s budding romance with Orchid. Blue asked many of the same questions I had earlier that same day, though Trixie’s answers were slightly different. The overall meaning was still the same, but I was pretty sure that she would have repeated what she told me word for word if she could’ve remembered. Blue had some new questions to go with a few of my own, and between the two of us, we kept Trixie talking long after we cleared our plates and passed dessert around.

We stayed in each other’s company for a while longer since no one really wanted to let the good mood go to waste, but it was already pretty late. I offered my home to my sister and me Mum, but they both wanted to sleep in their own beds for the night. After some hugs and familial kisses on cheeks, I waved them off and started filling out my journals since I’d forgotten to do it for some time. When I read through these to see if I missed anything, I often notice that my life is fucking weird. Today was just one of those strange ones, I guess, and now that I see how cruel what I did to Rainbow was, it makes me wonder what would happen if someone I didn’t like were to ever put their hands on Twilight. I’m guessing I’d Wither them and they would die soon after. Or I might just let them live out their last few years, searching for a way to get their revenge so I have a reason to kill them.

Man, I’m a real bastard at times.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

After sleeping alone for a few hours, I woke up and decided to get some writing done since I didn’t have shit else to do. Took a shower, shaved my face, did some harrowing manscaping with a magic knife, and sat myself down to write some more of Midnight Stroll and the Bewildering Brooch. It was slow going at first, but once I got into the swing of things, time started passing by a lot faster and I eventually heard three curt knocks on my door. I finished the sentence I was on and rose to go greet whoever was willing to bother me at seven in the morning.

Upon opening the door, I met a bright white unicorn with a scarlet red mane. She reminded me of a cross between Redheart and Fleur, but there was something about her that seemed like she wasn’t used to being around people. Her dead stare into my eyes when I opened my door made me a little defensive immediately, and not knowing who the Hell this woman was spooked me a little bit. I could tell from her posture that she wasn’t familiar with the area, but I could tell from her somewhat bulky build that she wasn’t someone to be trifled with.

“Wotcher. How can I help you?” I asked.

She pulled an envelope from her bag and handed it to me. “The Princesses want you to head north.”

I took it from her. “Which ones?”

“Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and Princess Celestia.”

“Huh. So who are you?”

She didn’t even blink. “Scarlet Snow. I’ll be your contact in the Crystal Empire.”

“Crystal Empire? Never heard of it. That’s not near the Gryphon Lands, is it?”

“It’s further north. The details you need to know are in the envelope.” She said curtly.

“No shit, I’m just getting info from as many sources as possible. It never hurts to be informed.”

Scarlet nodded. “I understand that, but I’m not exactly familiar with the area myself. I don’t know why we’ll be working together, but we will, so don’t get us killed.”

“I’ll try to avoid doing obviously dumb shit if you tell me how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.”

“I don’t know what that is. You’re an idiot.” And now you suck

I smirked. “I’m a prick and a smart one at that. I’d invite you in for a cuppa, but you don’t seem like the type for tea.”

“Coffee is the only thing worth drinking. Goodbye.” She turned and left.

I went back inside and sliced open the envelope, checking its contents. There was a picture of a castle made of what seemed to be crystal and some pretty detailed information. From the looks of things, Celestia wanted me to accompany the girls to the Crystal Empire and keep an eye on them since they were heading to pretty much unknown territory. Once I finished reading through the shit, I heard another goddamn knock, so I went to go check and see who was bothering me before I could start packing for my mission. I greeted Celestia right before she strode into my house without a word and started pacing in my entrance hall.

“Alright, you’re stressed out.” I remarked.

“Very. I’m sure Scarlet Snow gave you your information yesterday?” Celestia asked.

“Actually, she just gave it to me about twenty minutes ago. Shit’s weird, Celestia. Why is there a random kingdom just popping in from the ether?”

Celestia groaned. “I can’t keep my days straight if that tells you how frustratingly urgent this is. I need you to gather Twilight and the rest of the Elements and get to Canterlot as soon as possible. Well, Twilight is already gathering the girls. They’ll be here shortly so I can teleport you all to the Crystal Empire if you just got your information. Shining and Cadance are already there, but it would make me feel considerably better about the ordeal if you were to accompany the Elements on their journey there.”

I put a hand on her arm. “Look, hun. Calm down and give me the skinny. What are we talking about here?”

Celestia gave me a quick, squishy hug. “I’ll tell you a bit more than I told Twilight. A thousand years ago, one of my vassals, a Unicorn named Sombra, ruled the Crystal Empire far in the Arctic North. The place is very special to Equestria since, for some reason no one really knows of, the magic there resonates further south and generally influences luck and happiness in the mainland. When Sombra was still whole and peaceful, he ruled pleasantly and Equestria thrived, but once something made his heart turn darker than my own, Equestria nearly collapsed. During his reign of terror, corruption spread throughout the land and his Dark Magic grew stronger with each passing day until Luna and I had to subdue him entirely, but before we could finish our task, Sombra cast a curse on the land that made it vanish in the blink of an eye. The Crystal Empire has been lost since before Luna was sent to the moon, and I fear that its return is no good news for us.”

Well fucking shite. “So you’re telling me that someone powerful enough to rival yourself and Luna is reappearing and the entire world is at risk because of that shit?” I asked clutching my head.

Celestia winced. “Yes. I believe I should tell you that I think the girls will be more capable of handling things than Luna and I were since their power with the Elements is stronger than ours was.”

“You’re putting Twilight in world ending level danger because you think she might be able to pull through?” I asked, deceptively calm.

“You’re furious.” Celestia guessed. A little.

“I’m glad you told me that I could go along with them. If I can tap into my Dark Magic, I’m willing to bet that Noir could let me burn some of my life force to overpower him or something. I really hope it doesn’t come to that, but I’m willing to take a few hundred years off of my life to make sure Twilight lives on.”

“It will not come to that if the Elements have anything to say about it. I’m asking you to protect them from mundane threats, Maximus, not Sombra. Even I stand a poor chance against him: If you were to try and use Dark Magic against him, I’m sure you’d find yourself sorely lacking against his level of skill.”

“I’ll Seal his shit then. God forbid he hurts Twilight and I get a chance to put the hammer down.”

Celestia shook her head. “I’m telling you that the girls can handle this. I want you to hang back and keep an eye out for anything suspicious while they prepare for the journey, and once they get there, I want you to stick with Twilight and provide insight. They should be able to handle the rest of the mission, but I need you to be working behind the scenes, asking the right questions.”

“Alright, so don’t fuck Cadance as soon as I get there. Gotcha.” I gave her a crooked smile I couldn’t put my heart behind.

She gave me another hug. “Things will play out as they need to, Maximus. I have faith in you and Twilight.”

“I trust your wisdom.” Since it’s about Twilight.

Celestia gave me a little smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Thank you. Just try not to kill any innocent ponies before their time, okay?”

“Oi, it all depends on them! I don’t kill people that aren’t in my way.”

“Would you kill me if I was in your way?”

“Firstly, I don’t think I could if I wanted to. Secondly, stop asking dumb questions: I’ll put a finger in your bum.”

She rolled her eyes. “The girls will be here soon enough. Remember: This is Twilight’s mission more so than your own. Your task is to protect her and help as much as you can. Her task is to make things right. I trust you’ll keep this knowledge in mind when the time comes.”

“Wait, so we’re going off to a distant land, facing a threat we haven’t seen in a thousand years, and I’m not supposed to kill things? This is weird.”

“You’ll make it through. I suggest you start packing: You won’t be there much longer than a few days if all goes well, so pack lightly and take Nacht along with you. I’m sure it will come in handy.”

“Walk with me and talk with me. It’s rare enough that we ever have a social visit, so we could chat about some current events and whatnot.”

And so we did. While I was getting my shit together, Celestia told me about a few things that happened with her and Luna, but she ran out of things to talk about rather quickly, so I filled the time by telling her that Lupa had come back as Nashoba and that she’d returned as the Wolfmother of the Everfree or some shit like that. Celestia knew what I was talking about, much to my surprise, so she was able to follow along pretty well. I also told her about the advent of my new family and she was happy and sad for me simultaneously since it was nice that I was growing closer to people, but terrible that I would see them age and die long before I would have a chance to. She wasn’t quite so tactless with her words, though she did warn me about getting too close to Trixie and Blue. I told her to fuck off since I would rather love and lose than never love at all.

I finished up with my shit rather quickly since I’m a fucking man and I don’t need to pack everything in my wardrobe to go somewhere, so Celestia helped me strap on Nacht and we sat down for a cuppa. Celestia warned me to grab a coat before the girls got here, so I did and we chatted about a few observations we’d made and waited some more. When the girls arrived, Celestia gave them a once over and healed Rainbow’s hand once she realized that it was wrapped in bandages, though she didn’t ask how she’d broken it in the first place. She did, however, let us know that she’d stricken a deal with Elfriede to get us onto a solo train to the Crystal Empire since she couldn’t get us into the Empire itself, so I put on my coat and waited for Celestia to teleport us away.

After some assurances that the mission would go well, Celestia wasted no more time and we appeared in Gryphonia. Some stuffy looking old guy told us that we would have to board the train quickly so no one would have any objections to us being there. We did as he asked and settled in for the long haul. Thankfully, the train was magically warmed and the tracks were clear. I brought my journal along with me, just in case I get a chance to write shit down other than right now. As it is, I’m a little apprehensive about the whole endeavor. I trust that Twilight will be able to handle things, but I’m not looking forward to possibly fighting a mad tyrant that rivals two of the most powerful beings I’ve ever met, but here we are, doing stupid shit again.

Maybe we’ll save the world? Maybe we’ll all die a horrible death? Maybe I can get Twilight to calm down and focus before she gets too caught up in her own mind to allow anyone to help her? Things really just aren’t looking up right now. Hopefully there will be another journal entry after this.

Author's Notes:

And with this, my backlog is gone. Lovely.

Seriously though, Rainbow's character in the show has few redeeming qualities to me. Even when I did watch it, she never appealed to me in the slightest.

As Always, Stay Cool, Kids.