“Aw fuck me...” I put my head in my hands.

-What’s up?- Embris asked.

“I thought I could make copies of the android I already made. But for whatever reason I can’t...”

~Why is that a problem?~ Asked Ruby.

“The problem is since I can’t do that I’m going to have to make a couple thousand copies of androids by hand. It’s going to take way longer than a few a months. *sigh* This fucking sucks.”

=Well why not make an assembly line or something?= My head goes silent for a while.

“Holy shit you’re right.” I mutter excitedly. “But where would I put something like that? I need room for my tanks and helicopters and shit.”

=Dude, look at how fucking huge this room is. I think you‘ll have enough room to put an assembly-line-thing and all that other shit.=

-He does have a good point you know.-

“Yeah, I know… Fine, let’s do that.” I resign myself and set work building a working assembly line.

Y’know. I’m the literally the luckiest human on this planet. Know why? I spent my life learning about and making robots. I can literally build a simple machine with nothing but a few bars, wires, and circuits -I still need more shit be you know what I mean. Normally I would've used magic to make all this shit for me. But Ruby warned me about some ‘magical disallusion’. Basically any little thing that can go wrong with magic can spectacularly screw things up. Like say, a stray spell makes contact, or a potent one is cast nearby. So I resorted to asking Celestia for help in that area. And as usual, she was all too happy to help. She better be glad I’m not going to use my army to conquer her kingdom.

And why I wouldn’t do something like that? The ponies are easy to manipulate, they live in the middle ages with some newer tech here and there. They would hardly be able put up a fight against the might of human technology.

I think I’ve mentioned this before. But the answer is simple; I like it here. Sure, there’s too much sunshine and rainbows here, for me anyway, not considering any villains that pop up. They’re nothing against some fictional, and real, evils. And everything’s resolved in the end. I like that, though it’s not a good thing to have too much of anything in general. These ponies have lived like that for just about a thousand years. As Celestia has told me whenever I get too… what does she call it? Existential? I think that’s it.

I rarely get into that kind of mood. I hardly think about things like that anyway. I need to keep myself occupied… I wish I had a phone and a pair of headphones…

But I do! But just the phone. I wonder where I put my phone though…

Bah! I can use that summoning spell Twi showed me. She likes to test out spell every once in awhile… Here it is! Now for some headphones…

*poof* There! Now let's put some Three Days Grace and continue!

“Emby, we got a problem.”

=What?=

“I built the line. But where the fuck am I gonna get the materials needed?”

=Just spawn them!=

“No! I don’t wanna risk anything like Ruby said!”

=Then I don’t know what the fuck to do!=

“Ugh...” My head meets table with a dull thud sound. “This is gonna take way longer than I would like… Whatever, I’ll find a way.” I pick my head up and head to the elevator. Might as well go see what I missed...

… Alright, turns out I didn’t miss much, besides the obvious of spotting Starlight here and there around Twilight. Just some things between the girls that really aren’t worth mentioning. If anything, I could’ve foregone the magical double and nobody would’ve noticed. Except for Spark or Chrysi, but they know when to leave me alone.

Anyway, through that magical double, I did find out that Luna went to Twilight about some nightmare shit. Wonder what all that’s about… Eh, not my place to pry.

“Ember? You mind passing me the popcorn?” Chrysi asked.

“Sure.” Oh yeah, the three of us were watching Jackass on mtv. Funny shit, man. Funny shit. And the nut shot montage started! It’s been a little over a year since I’ve seen it.

*bang bang bang*

“Who’s banging on the door?” Asked a suddenly irritated bug pony.

“Don’t know. I’ll go look.” I get up from the couch, walk to the door as three more hard knocks come from the other side, and open. And a slightly urgent-looking Twilight. “Twilight? What’re you doing out so late? You pulling an all-nighter again?” She shakes her head calmly. Heh, she may be acting cool. But something is bothering her, could it be that shit with Luna?

“No. No… I just came by to invite you to a slumber party me and the girls are having!” She beamed. Weird.

“What? Why?”

“Well, you are our friend, right?” I nod. “So why wouldn’t I invite you?”

“Hm, yeah. But why so late?” I caught her, and she knows it too.

“Just, are you coming or not?”

“As much I was want to do that inside of any woman right now, I can’t. But, I’ll go. Lemme just let Spark and Chrysi know.” Twilight nodded, not getting my joke, happily and flew off. I let the girls watching the movie know what’s going on and went to Twi’s castle.

“Twlight, you didn’t tell me Luna would be here. What’s going on?” I made it to Twi’s room, I had to scour the entire castle to find where this slumber thing was being held, and found the six plus Luna were getting ready to clock out, all in their own beds in one room. What? No sleeping bags?

“You mean Twilight didn’t tell you about the Tantabus?” Rainbow asked from her bed. I shake my head. She turned to Twilight with a ‘Really?’ look on her face.

“The Tantabus is a creature We created to force us to relive the day We nearly Concerned Equestria.” Luna explained. “It seems to have gotten, bored of reliving the same dream over and over. And has escaped into the dream realm. If we don't stop it now it may escape into the waking world.” Ah, well then.

“Well then. Good night!” I snap my fingers and I teleport my bed to me. I flop onto it and cast a sleep spell.

There’s nothing much changed about my dreams, they still range from annoying nightmares to pleasant dreams from my childhood. But what very little I got from Luna, that should change at some point.

Well, I should at least prepare for whatever this taint-thing is.

The dream around me, which was a normal, human, city setting with me standing on some curb, shatters to oblivion and blackness takes its place.

“Eh, no point to mess around.” I say to myself. The inky blackness turns white and a chair tv duo appear from nothing. I take a seat on the chair, grab the remote the just materialized on the armrest. And muck around channel surfing. Which is really more or less viewing old shows I remember like Dexter’s Lab and KND. I am so glad mom and dad introduced me to the late nineties, early two-thousands kids shows. I can rewatch them over and over and I’ll never get bored.

Just as Number Four punches the dentist guy in the face a tear appears to my left. And out comes this glittering blob of purple shit. It pauses once it sees me. And some tendril like thing moves like the creature is looking around.

“You’re the Tantabus?” The thing swivels what must be its head and look right at me. As if not expecting me to talk. “How underwhelming.” My remark made it rear its head back, in some way to portray indignance. “I expected some fucking monster.” The floating Muk’s head dipped down, in apparent anger, and everything went black. Next thing I know I’m laying in some grassy field.

Wasn’t I just having a one-way conversation with the Tantabus?

Yes, I was. I think it just changed the scenery. In my fucking dream, which means it’s fucking with my head. I get up and look around. Specifically, I’m standing in a small, high school football sized field, surrounded by a forest of sorts. Said forest is too thick to peer into. Why would a creature made to create nightmares remake a forest as mine?

A loud roar broke me from my musing and the ground shook. I swivel my whole being to where the roar came from, just then a large lion bursts in from the foliage.

*The fuck is a lion doing in a forest!?* I had no time to think about it as the beast roared and pounced me. I was just fast enough to duck to the side and make a beeline towards the forest. It was difficult navigating the thick foliage, what with the canopy making things dark here, but I made do. I kept swerving, sliding, jumping and swinging through it all. The rhythmic thumping of a quadruped behind let me know the lion gave chase.

So there I was, running like a madman through a forest with the mother of all lions chasing me. I stole a glance behind me and watched as the giant cat barreled through and knocked firmly rooted trees from its path. It had no problem chasing me while I was having a difficult time sprinting while dodging everything. And I’m starting to feel tired too. Fuck me…

But there’s light at the end of the tunnel, or treeline in this situation. I can see the forest edge from here. Maybe if I make it past the lion will stop. This forest must be its territory.

New objective: Make it out the forest alive, and in one piece.

A sharp pain in my shoulder made the latter part more important.

With renewed vigor I push on, I’m mere meters away… yards… feet… inches… I use the last of my strength and leap. And tumble along the ground. I feel spent, tired, and worst of all, hurt. I can feel the protest from the back of my shoulder and I groggily get to my feet. I turn to the forest and watch as the lion walks along the edge, then turn tail and leave. A wave of relief washes over I turn around-

Where the hell am I? What’s this place? It looks like home… but, in ruins… The skyscrapers are no more, buildings are either half destroyed or nothing but piles of rubble. What is this place? This isn’t home. Or is it? No, it can’t be...

No… no… this isn’t home. This is… this is…

THIS ISN’T HOME!

A building crumbles to rubble on my right. I take a few shaky steps towards the nearest street. This place looks a lot like home, but it isn’t. I know it isn’t, but there’s a nagging feeling telling me it is. But there’s no sign of live, no animals can be seen, hell, I’d feel better just to see a fucking bug. This city is deserted, why? What happened here? It looks like the fucking apocalypse happened.

But that can’t be, this place was just fine last time I was here! How can Boston be in ruins!? It looks like this place has been abandoned for years! Decades even!

“Where am I? This isn’t Earth. No way in HELL is this planet Earth. Where the fuck am I?” I look around at all the disrepair. “Where the hell am I!?”

“Ember!?” I turn around and do a double take. Right there stood Princess Luna. What is she doing here..? Oh, this is all a dream.

“Luna?” I breath a sigh of relief. “Oh thank god this was all a dream.” This time all the ruined buildings fade away. Leaving the both of us in a white void.

“Was the Tantabus here?” I nod.

“Yeah, that explains all the dilapidated buildings...” How could I have fallen for something so stupid? I was just talking with the thing before it changed the playing field.

Speaking of which…

“Princess Luna!” I turn to my left and watch as Twilight runs up to Luna.

“Twilight, we must make haste!” Twi nods and they nearly vanish.

“Wait!” I shout, causing them to pause. “Take me with you.” Luna nods and things start going blurry.

“Prepare thyself!” I blink and we’re in Ponyville. But I thought we were… Wait, there’s something off. I can barely make it out, what the hell?

“Uh, Twilight, where are we?” I ask as move to stand by her side.

“We’re in the dream plane, Ember.” She matter-of-factly.

“... What?” What is she talking about? Does she means we’re in some other world? But that doesn't make sense… Unless, oh… Oh! It’s like YuGiOH! Like when the loser of a battle gets sent to the Shadow Realm! Except ponies come here when they sleep. But that also implies… Holy shit.

So souls are a thing. That means I have one too…

Ponies fill the streets and they wander around. I’m betting they’re wondering what the hell is going on. I spot Lyra and Bon Bon. And they’re fused together.

Some people have some crazy ass dreams.

“Everypony!” Everyone looks to Twilight while I tune her out. I have some beef with that thing.

*There it is.* It’s up in the sky. I barely noticed it, but it’s there. Since this the dream realm, and I can do anything I want. I will myself to stand right in front of that thing. The thing flinches and moves to get away, but I hold it in my magic.

“So, you like making nightmares.” It wasn’t a question, I meant more as a statement. “Well, let’s see how you like it.” I large bubble forms around us. Just big enough for me to work with. I turn invisible and recreate the battlefield I nearly lost my life in. And I force the thing to turn into me. Just as it begins to take in it’s surroundings I let it all begin, but with amped up horror. I kinda figured my, or any person from Earth, nightmares would be far worse compared to ponies. The worst I’ve ever heard from any pony, whenever I talk with them about anything, was losing a fucking pen. And that’s among the worst I’ve hear from these ponies. I’d never think they didn’t have any more wicked nightmares. But from what little I gathered I made a guess.

And boy did that guess pay off.

The Tantabus posing as me was yanked to the side by one of my comrades, just as a pile of dirt is thrown up in a small explosion. I made basically made the dream a rendition of Full Metal Jacket. The part when war happens. I thought it’d be way more interesting to watch it squirm when the Vietcong attacked. And it was, the thing looked absolutely horrified as it watched its comrades shoot at the opposing army. Picking them off one by one.

“What are you waiting for? Shoot god damnit!” One of them shouts to the Tantabus. It fiddles with its assault rifle, points it forward, and fires. The result was… less than spectacular. It was still one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen, but I thought things would go south fast. It kinda did, but the thing was holding up for itself.

*Alright then, let’s amp things up some more.* I then summon a couple hundred more Vietcong and I make them start to run low on bullets.

“Damnit!” One Soldier cries out. “We’re runnin’ low!”

“Call for support!”

“Phone's gone!”

“Fuck!” The Tantabus looks back and forth at them yelling. A nasty idea enters my mind I execute it. A stray bullet rips through its shoulder.

“Gah!” It yells. I didn’t expect it to yell. Upon hearing this I let more and more ‘stray bullets hit it. I realize I’m making it experience what I did not long ago. But I didn’t care, how was that relevant? I was getting revenge. Sure, it’s petty revenge, but still. It screwed with my mind. I think I’ve already said I have a very particular pet peeve against that. By now it’s screaming in pain, the field has faded away into whiteness. I stop the lead barrage and survey the damage. It’s ‘bleeding’ out and it lays on a non-existent floor. I will myself to be seen and appear next to it. Once the thing notices me its eye widen and it reverts to original form. But then it does something I didn’t expect it to do. Its cowering away.

“Hardly gonna put a fight huh?” I asked, but I didn’t expect an answer. Verbally anyway, I see the thing shrink a little. Seeing this, I put on an absolutely mad grin. I can feel my face stretching to show how much in bliss I’m in. Here, is a creature created to turn Luna’s dream into nightmares, but now it cowers before.

I feel powerful, I feel I have complete control over this supposed monster. I have complete control of this thing. I can make it do whatever I want, and if it refuses I can just create another nightmare and force it to submit. Gotta change things up if Luna’s experience with it serves any advice.

“Oh the things I’m going to do to you...” I cackle, only for a little bit. I can’t let this thing out of my sight.

*Crack* A huge, long, black crack makes itself known. We both turn to it and more cracks spiderweb from it. A chunk of… whatever the hell makes up the wall, breaks off. Revealing a dark blue, and very confused, alicorn.

“Ember? Art thee alright?”

*Fucking damnit.* “Yeah. I’m fine. Hey. You mind coming back a bit later?” I put a cage around the Tantabus to keep it from escaping. And almost put a few dead people’s faces. To snuff out any attempts from it to do so.

“...” Luna looks a little puzzled. Really can’t wonder why. “Why?”

“I was just talking with this thing. Just give me a few more minutes.” I turn back to the mass of star stuff, again it flinches when turn to it.

“Eeeh… Ok...” I hear her hesitantly say. One flap of a pair wings lets me know she left, I repair the hole and cracks and prepare the Tantabus for one HELL of a nightmare.

“Hahahaha! Yes! Run you little bug!” I cackle as I deliberately stomp my giant feet close to it. It took the form of a random pony and started running as soon as it saw me growing to gigantic proportions. I keep this up for a minute or two and move to actually step in the little thing. But the last second before it’s crushed I fade away. As my body fades away I watch as its head swivels around, trying to look for me. Scared out of its mind. *I think I’ve had enough.* I think to myself as I get rid of the bubble.

To bad the Tantabus didn’t turn into itself when gravity took. And also too bad it changed back into its original form and flew straight for luna as soon as it saw her. Poor girl, she looks like she’s trying to keep something from happening in that bubble she’s in. I wonder what it is she’s straining herself over?

“Princess Luna! The Tantabus flew back into you!” I heard Twilight yell.

“It has?” As I got closer I saw she was sweating, wow, she’s really straining herself. “Ember. What have you done to it?” She huffs.

“Nothing much,” Came my nonchalant response. “just showed it a thing or two about human dreams.”

“No matter!” She shouts. “It is over and done with! We shall end this tiring spell now!” Just as she said that, the dream version of Ponyville fades to white. I stand there for what seemed like hours.

“I wonder if I can cast a spell while I’m still asleep...” I snap my fingers, then I feel myself fading away. “Hm, looks like I can.” The transition from the land of sleep to the land of wakefulness was rather quick since I found myself sitting up in my bed while everyone else was rubbing the sleep out of their eyes. And Luna is lying on the floor, slowly recovering from whatever the hell she was doing. *So I can cast cast spells in my sleep. Cool.*

~That was actually me. I sensed the other ponies waking so I decided to wake you up.~ Oh well that’s more sense than using real-world magic in my sleep.

*Oh, thanks then.* “So that’s it Luna?” She fully stands up and faces me.

“Yes, we have successfully contained the Tantabus. But we must ask. What have you really done to it? It was trembling when it came back to us.”

“Nothing you need to worry yourself about, Luna. Just know I had fun ‘playing’ with it.” I smile and she quirks up a brow. “FIne. I had some fun making it relive my own nightmares, and some others I created.” At my explanation she blanched. Ah, she knew what I can do with dreams, good. I had so mean-ass nightmares, especially after the war.

“Ah, yes, we will retire to our chambers then.” Luna hastily teleported out of the room.

“Uhm… Ember?” Fluttershy said.

“Yes, Fluttershy?”

“What were you talking about your own nightmares? You have nightmares?” She puts on a concerned expression.

“Yes Fluttershy. I still have nightmares. As impossible as that sounds.” I glance at Rainbows smug face. “But they’re mostly about the war nowadays.” The smug smirk died and shame took over her smug attitude. She seriously thought I was weak or something just by having nightmares? Heh, superficial. “But I’ve managed, so you don’t need to worry about my Shy.”

“Oh, ok.” Her demeanor brightened up a bit.

“Alright. Well, I’ll just be going back home if that’s all you wanted me here for.” I teleport me and my bed back home before the girls, or Spike, could object. And good right back to sleep. My time with the Tantabus really tuckered me out, mentally, for some reason…