And you want to know I got myself into this little predicament, and what happened? Well sit the fuck back and let me tell ya. Since I don’t have a good at the concept of magic, and there was no way in HELL I was going to carry that bag. I mean, it’s not like I’m weak, but a gold-filled bag, really? How does that fucker even carry that much gold!?

Anyway, since I don’t a good grasp on magic, I held the bag in my magic at eye-level behind me. Because I’ve seen that when a unicorns trips while holding shit in their magic the fucking objects they were holding stays in fucking place. And I was basing that off of what I was doing. Something I really have to stop since the laws of magic the ponies abide by really don’t apply to me, at all.

Which led to the thing landing on my head. Now, I will only tell you this once and once only. Nanobot tech has made it far enough where it does enhance every attribute a normal person has. But even that hasn’t been able to go so far as recovering from brain damage, sure it’s heal the brain when it does take damage, preventing death, paralysis, and shit like that. But not memory loss or amnesia. With the size of each nanobot they can only carry so much information. And since they were only collectively specified to heal and enhance the body. They really can’t store memories or info that the brain has lost. You’ll figure why I’m saying all of this when I go back to that predicament.

But you’d think those fucking science snobs would think to designate a certain amount of nanobots to store memory right? Well apparently there wasn’t any kind of tech that could transfer physical data to digital data. I.E., copying memories from your brain and storing the copies into their system. The tech’s only been around for a few years, nothing’s perfect.

Anyway, going back to current time, the bag landed on my head which such force that I swear to you made cracks in my skull. Nearly turning my brain to pudding. NEARLY. Making me head briefly look like an oval. It still rendered me unconscious instantly either way. Giving me the luxury of brief pain followed by a dreamless state of semi-consciousness. Now skip forward however long the dreamless coma was before I woke up. Which I will tell word for word.

*Ugh… what happened? Why can’t I move.* All I can see is black. *Am I dead?* I try to move, I dimly note that I’m laying on a bed. *Or am I sleeping?* Right now I don’t have any idea about where I am, or what happened before, or even- *W-who am I?* Once I realized that my eyes almost shoot out of my head. A second later my vision clears and I see that I’m in some kind of room. I tried to move around, but everything felt… weak. I could barely muster the strength to hold up my right arm. I know that’s bad, but I don’t know why. Next thing I tried to do was speak.

“H-hello? Is anyone there?” My voice was raspy and dry.

I needed water, but all I could do was wait.

Eventually I heard two people walking outside the room I was in. I then heard a door open and the same two people walked in. Since I could hardly move I had to wait until they got into my field of view.

“Uh… hey.” I weakly mutter. I heard a gasp and-

“Oh goodness! You’re awake!” A… head? Came into view? I know that’s a head. Even the color is off, this thing’s skin is a bright white, that’s not normal by human standards, and it’s got light pink hair tied back in a bun. It has huge eyes--really big eyes, like, giant squid big-- a mouth, nose and hair and weird looking ears, they look like dog ears, and a horn!? Ok definitely not human, I’m on some alien planet now. “Do you feel ok? Oh, you probably need some water, I’ll go get you some.” The head leaves my view. It quickly returns holding a cup to my dry lips. As soon as the refreshingly cold water touches my lips I drink eagerly. Supplying much-needed nourishment down my throat. I quickly slurp up the cool liquid and let out a refreshed sigh.

“Thank you.” I look to the weird creature. All I can see is its head.

“You’re welcome. Do you feel ok?” I could only think to answer. I didn’t have much to object by.

“I feel a little weak, but other than that I feel fine.” The head nods.

“That’s good.”

“Um… this may sound, weird... But, who am I? And what are you?” The thing’s eyes grow wide and stare directly at me. “Uh… you’re kinda weirding me out looking at me like that.”

“This is not good. This is not good. Uhmmm… I’ll be right back.” Before I could object the thing leaves the room. Leaving me to my own devices. I decided to concentrate on getting the strength back to my body. Firstly, arms. “Alright, let’s get my arms moving.” I whisper to myself. I muster all the strength I could and put it into raising both arms. I feel them twitch as I concentrate, I do so much I close my eyes. After a while I relax and open my eyes. My arms are fully held up, and they’re covered in feathers.

“Woah. I have feathers?” I twist around each limb. “Huh, I wonder what I look like with all these feathers.” I set both my arms down. “Alright, let's try my legs now.” The lower part of my body was really easier to get feeling back into it. With a little effort I’m able to raise both my legs. With that out of the way I move to get off the bed. But when I reach to the left I feel something tug on my arm. I look and see that there was… an I.V.? Yeah, an I.V. stuck to the middle of my arm. Giving me chills up my spine.

I never liked needles.

I quickly pull it off my arm and hoist myself up to a sitting position.

*I don’t know how, but this feels unnatural to me.* It does! All of my senses and strength returning to after I’ve been knocked out for who knows how long. It feels like it happened too quickly. I just can’t figure out why…

I throw that thought aside and push myself to a standing position. I stumbled a bit before I got my footing. And immediately I get light headed, almost sending me to the floor. Luckily I had the to footboard of the bed to hold on to. I took my time recovering and I looked at myself, I had grey feathers covering my body, and I had talons for feet. Does this make me some kind of bird-man? Do I have wings? Yes I do! That’s fucking awesome! If only I knew how to control them.

Pushing those thoughts aside I decided to take a look at my surroundings. It was a normal hospital room all things considered. I mean, there was that weird creature with that weird looking head, it reminds me of some kind of animal, a horse maybe? The ears and mouth kind looked like a horse’s. But the eyes are fucking huge for that head. I didn’t even get to get a good look at it. Speaking of which… Shouldn’t it be back?

“I don’t know Nurse Redheart, there’s know way he could’ve taken that much damage to the skull.” I hear a new voice from outside.

“Please, just trust me.” That same voice that came from that creature spoke. The door opens and two… ponies..? What the fuck are these things!? I thought they were doctors! Not fuckin’ aliens.

“Ember! It’s so good to see-”

“Oh no! You need to sit back down!” The white skinned thing walks closer to me, but I back away. I’m starting to panic.

*These things aren’t human! What and where the fuck am I!?* “Ember? Who’s Ember, I’ve never even heard of that name!” The purple, thing, walks closer to me and I back up until I hit a wall.

“You’re Ember. Remember? You you were sent here by your kinds technology, you fought Rainbow-”

“I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about!”

“Alright, sir, stay calm please.” The white thing said in a serious tone.

“How can I!? I don’t know where or who I am, I don’t know who or what the fuck you are, and… and...” I’m starting to breath heavily as I started to panic even more. I started grabbing anything I could, I really need to hold onto something right now.

“That’s enough!” The white thing tilted down and-

*Pow!*

Shot a bolt of white light at me. At first I thought it was just that, light. But the following explosion told me otherwise. I was sent flying back, landing on the floor with a solid thump. I managed to not get hurt, that much. As soon as my senses came back I felt a little sore on my chest.

“Ugh, that hurt.” Then I remember something. “Wait, wasn’t I up against a wall?” My question was soon answered when the dust and smoke settled. Before my eyes laid quite a site; there was a wall, a HUGE wall, with a sizable hole right at the bottom, where I was standing. And the two creatures look on to me in shock. The things and I stay like that for an eternity until the purple one moved.

“Ember? Are you-” That was all I needed to get up and bolt off in the other direction. Luckily there was a forest behind me.

*Better off in the woods than in the clutches of these things.* I run past tree after tree until I know that they weren’t able to follow me. I slow to a stop and stand up against a tree. I’d thought all the running would tire me out, I mean, I’m not a track runner, but I think I did run--or was it a full-blown sprint?-- for a while. It must be this unnatural feeling, maybe my body’s been changed somehow? I did just survive a point blank explosion that may have been as strong as a grenade. That was shoot at me by that weird thing… Speaking of which. I need to find civilization. Hopefully I’m still on earth. But the trees around me suggest otherwise. They have a cartoony quality to them. And they’re brightly colored.

“Whelp, I’m not gonna get anywhere standing around.” I say to myself. I then decide to walk around this weird forest, maybe I’ll find a path…

“This is bad this is bad this is bad!” Twilight was chanting to herself, she’s been pacing around the room of the medical hospital that has just been renovated. “Why did you do that Nurse Redheart!? Didn’t you know that happens to him!?” She faces the white coated pony in a frantic pace.

“No I didn’t! That happens when a simple spell as cast!?”

“Yes! Oh, what do we do?” In the heat of the moment Twilight briefly forgot about her friends. “Oh! Right! The girls!” Only for a second. “I’ll go get the girls, you tell everypony what happened. Hopefully we can get the princess to help.” The purple alicorn teleports aways so she can gather her friends so she can start a search party. While Nurse Redheart was left still a little shocked at what her spell did to the human. She stood that way until realization dawned on her and she went to go tell other staff what that explosion was.

I hate this place.

Seriously! I haven’t found a single fucking path in this god forsaken forest! And everything has gained a sinister look. The trees look dead and old, the leaves block out the sun but I could still see just fine, and even the roots of some trees are exposed. I tripped over a few of them. It was then that I noticed the cuts that would form closed after bleeding for a second. Do I heal that quickly? Do humans heal that quickly? Ugh… so many questions I needed to be answered. I brush those thoughts away and stopped to look around. At least I can experiment with these wings I have. Wait… they’re not feathered? They’re like… an extra set of arms, with large flaps of skin in between each freakishly long finger, eyugh… Nevermind the wings...

As it was before, forest, as much forest as the eye can see. Except that there was a light in a certain direction. Figuring that it was the only way out of this fucking forest, I head towards the light. Which eventually turned into a large clearing as I got closer. A clearing that was actually a field of grass with a river running through it. I followed the river and it lead to a small two-story old-timey house. With tones of animals around it. I was far enough that those things wouldn’t see me. But what puzzled me is that I saw all of this in about the distance equivalent of a major league soccer stadium. I’m going to assume that all my senses and other things are some how on steroids.

But the second thing I noticed, was that a small racoon was walking towards me. I nearly flipped out when I saw it. But I DID when every other living being started to slowly come towards me, making a lot of noise. And I ran back into the forest.

Fluttershy has been tending to a bird that had a broken wing. Why wouldn’t she? She always helps an animal in need. But in the middle of the check-up she heard a commotion outside.

“I’m sorry Mr. Bird. I’ll be right back. Ok?” Mr. Bird nods with a smile. And the butter-yellow pegasus trots outside in a brisk pace. And she is greeted by her animal friends frantically head towards her, but stop at the sight of her. A little white bunny hopped to the front. A worried look on his face. “Angle. What’s wrong?” Angle makes some weird motions with his paws. “You saw Ember? Where?” The bunny points to the edge of the forest where he and the rest of the animals last saw Ember. “He’s in the Everfree Forest? Oh no! I need to go tell the girls!” She turned to go into Ponyville, but she met face-to-face, literally, with Twilight's face.

I fucking hate it here. Apparently the animals of this fucking place want me as their afternoon snack! At least I was able to run faster than them. I think, I didn’t look like they were after me in that aspect. But they’re fucking animals, on an alien planet! Probably. Some things do look like I’m still on Earth. I just hope I’m right. I need to find a town or a city or SOME form of human civilization before those… things find me. I can only hope and move on at this point. But… if I don’t find what I’m looking for… What will happen? To me? I don’t know if I can survive out here. In a dark forest.

But then as I was walking I tripped over a rock.

“Geehh, stupid rock.” I get back up and look back at the rock. But something catches me eye. A fucking path! Finally something to follow! Maybe this can lead me to a village or something. But, which way to go? Hmm… The left looks like it leads back to wherever I just escaped from, so right it is! Because you can’t go wrong when chose right, right?

Anyway, I follow this path since I didn’t have anything else to lose. And one thing I noticed is that the treeline is more open along the path. I can see that day is turning to night. Too quickly, like, I can see the sky changing colors. That’s too quick, if I can literally see the sky changing colors in real time. That’s not good, I’m either in some apocalypse, or I’m definitely on some alien planet. And I’m leaning towards the latter.

The girls, plus Spark and Chrysanthemum in disguise, are all gathered at the edge of Everfree by Fluttershy’s cottage.

“Alright girls. Fluttershy last saw Ember go into the Everfree Forest. We need to find him before anything bad happens to him. Now remember, he has no memory of us or anypony-”

“How’d that happen?” Rainbow interrupted.

“From what Spark and Chrysanthemum have told me. Ember received his payment from, whatever job he has, and that large bag landed onto his head when he tripped.”

“How did he trip?” Aj asked a little confused.

“One of his talons wedged itself in a split in the wood floor of our house.” Spark answered.

“Oh… Then how-”

“He was holding his pay with his magic behind him. Can we get this search party started?” Spark asked a little anxiously.

“Yes, let's get this started. Fluttershy, Rainbow; fly up and look around the forest and see if you can find him.” The two pegasi nodded and flew up to survey said forest. Fluttershy a bit shakily at first but Rainbow was there to reassure the timid pony. “The rest of us split to two groups: Applejack, Rarity, and Pinkie. Then me, Spark, and Chrysanthemum. Everypony ready?” The ponies, changeling and human bot nod. “Ok, let’s go!” And with that, the two groups spits off in two different direction to go look for their human friend.

Ok, I think I’m being followed. I don’t know by what. But I can’t get this feeling of something, or things, following. Maybe it’s just my brain tricking me? I hope so, the random rustling of bushes along the path I’m walking along doesn’t help with my paranoia. At least the rustling would reveal a small animal like a squirrel and rabbit sometimes. It’s creeping me out that some of these bushes would reveal nothing. Well, at least with light shining in through the open tree line I could see well.

*Grraaahh!* A brown wolf with bright yellow eyes pounces at me from one of the bushes.

“Fuck!” I managed to dodge it and break into a full-blown sprint again. I hear howls behind me and I hear more than one of those wolves start to chase me. I take a peek behind me and I wish I didn’t; there were at least six of those fuckers chasing me. Which spurred me to keep running for dear life. Since I was still on the same dirt path I lasted a while before my feet started aching. My running became slower and the wolves were starting to catch up. With my mind running at hyperspeed I take a chance and veer off the path. The foliage making hard for me and the wolves to follow me. Luckily I had the luxury of arms so I decided to climb up a tree. I thought they wouldn’t get to me. Which did work, they try and try and climb up the think tree. But they keep failing, so now they pace around; waiting for me to fall back down or something.

It was around this point I got to take a breather, and get a good look at these wolves. But… They’re not wolves. Are they..? They’re made of wood!? What the actual fuck is this place!? Fuck if they’re such thing as wolves made of wood who knows what the fuck is out there: A bear made of boulders? A fucking lion with extra head? I don’t want to know neither find out. Which gives me two options: run like hell back towards the clearing where that house was, or stay here and fend off the wooden wolves.

The choice was obvious; head back to the clearing.

But how would I get past these wolves? Maybe I distract them somehow? All I got is a few branches and leaves. I could use a branch as a club! Yes! Ok, now which branch to lob off… oo! That one’s pretty thick, and it’s about to fall off so I can easily rip it off, no problem. I just wonder if it’s long enough to hit them from here. Lemme just swing it as hard as I can…

*Thwack!* Yep, it’s long enough. I managed to clog one of ‘em on the head. It yelped in pain and backed off. Yes! I just gotta- fuck… The branch broke. Fuck me… Uh… is there- yes! Another big stick! It’s a little shorter though. I don’t think that should matter though. I should be able to… *thwack!* yep, this time it held. I hit the same wolve I think. I got another yelp and the wolf backed off. Alright! If I can keep this up- no! The fucker grabbed the branch from me! Fucker! Dammit now what!? Think, thiiiiiink! Wait, the fuck’s that noise? Sounds like a plane flying over. Could it be?

“Fluttershy! I think I found him!” Fuck me. Wait! The wolves are distracted! Fucking RUN!

“Hey get back here!” Rainbow yelled. She and Fluttershy would’ve dove under the canopy and go after Ember, but a pack of Timberwolves were keeping them occupied.

“Fuck you!” Luckily for both of them. Rainbow Dash, the most aweseome mare in all of Equestria, (A/N *snort* *snort*) bucked the wooden creatures to splinters. All while getting a few splinters and scratches.

“Rainbow! Are you ok?” Fluttershy hovers down next to her fellow pegasus.

“I’m fine Fluttershy, c’mon! He went this way!” The two ponies gave chase to the Confused human. “I swear to Celestia Ember’ going to get a good buck in the head for this!”

What the fuck is up with these things!? They don’t leave me the fuck alone! I think another two of those things are after me now! I’msofuckedI’msofuckedI’mso FUCKED! Up exposed root root decided to trip me, again. God dammit. I can hear voices getting closer. I try to get up but pain makes itself noticed in my foot. Fuck I sprange it. Alright, get up and LIMP! Limp you bastard. I must be running on adrenaline or something ‘cause the pain’s quickly fading away. But after what felt like a couple seconds I was able to sprint again. Ok, really loving my weird body now. Really fucking loving it. I glance back and see one of those aliens speed up towards me.

“You’re mine!” It yelled.

“Not yet bitch!” I grabbed a tree and used it a pole to swing sideways… How am I doing all of this cool stuff? Shouldn't I be dead or something?

“You bucker!” Not questioning it now, gotta keep running like hell. The blue thing after me seems really pissed now. How is it that fucking fast!? It managed to cover the distance equal to a fucking half a high school football field! Doesn’t matter, just keep-

*SMACK!* Fuck… hitting a tree face-first at full speed wasn’t in the plan. Everything’s going black, I see that thing slow to stop in front of me before my eyes close, a look of… concern? I don’t know it needs to be concerned about me. At this point they might just kill me for cause so much trouble for them.

Rainbow was panting heavily, Ember definitely gave her the workout of a lifetime.

“Dang, never had so much work put into something before.” She huffed.

“Rainbow!” Fluttershy burst in from a bush, her mane and tail quite a mess. “Oh goodness! Are you ok?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, just a little-”

“*gasp!* Ember!” The yellow pony rushes to the unconscious human, holding his head. “Ember! Wake up! Ember!” She yelled over and over as she cried onto the human. Not knowing whether he’s alive or not.

“Fluttershy, c’mon. He’s gonna be ok.” Rainbow tried to comfort her friend. All Fluttershy could do was gently lay the human's head down and sniffle. Rainbow sat next to her and draped a wing over her withers. “He’s gonna be alright Flutters. C’mon, help me get him up.” Fluttershy nodded and did her best wedging herself under the incapacitated human. She noticed that his feathers were still warm. Being around animals with lifespans shorter than her own has taught her that the body of an animal who has passed would normally lose it’s body rapidly. Since this wasn’t the case Fluttershy felt immediately better, knowing that her friend was ok, to say the least. It put a small smile on her lips and she trotted with a little spring to her step with Rainbow as they both made their way out of the terrible forest without incident.

Black, nothing but black. Am I dead? Sure feels like it… Wait there’s a bright light. Ugh, too weak to even move…

“Rest now Ember.” I heard. Where did that voice come from? “Over here.” I look to where the voice came from. Another one of these things!? Fuck! “Do not fret, I am here to help you.”

“Ch’, yeah? How?” I can feel myself again so I adopt the flight-or-fight mode. The dark blue thing just… smiles I think.

“I am going to give you back your lost memories.” What?

“What..?” The alien giggles.

“Before you lost your memories I have stored a near complete copy within my mind. Every night I do so for as many ponies as I can. But I can only do so much...” She trailed off.

“And what does this have to do with me?”

“It means that I will give you your memories back, If you will allow it.”

“How do I know this isn’t a trap?”

“We are in your dream, nothing can or will happen to you.”

“Really?” I toss the defencive stance, but I still held my guard up. “Prove it.”

“Very well then.” The eye glow a very bright white and millions of little white dots appear out of nowhere. some clump together while clouds of different colors form and surround some clumps.

“Are we in space?”

“No, we are not. Do you not remember this dream?” I give the thing a blank look. “Right, may I?” At first I didn’t know what it meant by that. But then I remembered why it showed up… Ehh… It’s not like I got anything else to lose, besides my life. I would really hate if that happened.

“Fine, just, how are going to do it?” The thing makes a snickering noise.

“Magic.” It gets close to me and moves to touch that weird horn thing I just noticed it had.

“Magic? How-” I’m interrupted by a bright white flash. Which goes away as fast as it appeared. Once I could see again the-

...
…
…

I remember everything.