Author's Notes:

Alright Faguettes gather around, even you Dakiderpy, you little shitlord. This is the story inspired by Lyler going to Bronycon.

Lyler gets off of her plane from Equestria to the actual Baltimore, Maryland and then-

"ERMAHGERD THUR ARE SO MENY ANERNS!@" she screams, leaping through the gate, two saddlebags ducttaped to her sides. Anon crawls out behind her, carrying a small carryon bag of luggage.

"Why are we doing this again?" Anon asks. "I would rather be on /mlp/. This is literal, in real life, shitposting."

"BECAUSE NOTHING ABOUT US IS SUBTLE OR GOOD."

"Good point," Anon says. "Then lets go."

The two hopeless characters walk through the terminal, when a security guard immediately rounds on our two protagonists.

"Sir. You need to put your service dog on a leash!" he calls after them.

"Oh, shit, that's right," Anon says, pulling a leash and collar out and throwing them around Lyler as quickly as he could.

"THIS IS KINKY."

"Did that dog just talk?" the guard asks.

"Yes," Anon says quietly. "And trust me, that is going to likely be the least weird pony related thing you see today."

The guard eyes down Lyler, nods, then leaves.

"Holy shit that worked," Anon says.

"PRIEST DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO."

"Fair, now, do you want to finally go meet the Barcast?" Anon asks, looking down at the poor, challenged creature.

"YAAAS."

The two little shitlords headed down to baggage claim, grabbed their checked luggage, then waited outside patiently for the light rail. Many folks, some as skinny as a rail, some larger than, well, lyler, wait along side.

"Dude!" one says coming up to Anon. "I love your Lyra plushie. Can I touch it?"

"I don't think-"

But without giving Anon a chance to speak, the brony in front of him reaches his hand out and runs his fingers through Lyler's mane. Lyler's eyes grow wide and then she projectile vomits onto the floor. The brony takes a step back, flabbergasted.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK," screams the 22-year old man.

"It's a feature," Anon sighs. "It's actually candy."

"THIS IS MAH LAZAR," Lyler adds.

Just then the Lightrail shows up, and Lyler and Anon step inside. A handful of bronies decide to circle around the green and pink puddle of pony puke, some of which are muttering "A pony that pukes candy?"

As the doors close on the train car, you watch out the window as a poor sap dips his fingers into the candy and gives it a good whiff. The train takes off, as the man turns and vomits on his friend.

The train takes off, and Anon immediately regrets being in this situation.

"This is going to be the most circlejerky, bullshit, meta thing ever. And nothing about this is going to be funny. How the fuck is this a good idea?"

"ANERN!"

"What?" Anon asks, looking to Lyler.

She points up to a small sign on the wall of the rail car.

The sign says "This is Car 5049"

"THIS IS CAR ANON."

You sigh and look away from the pony, simply wishing this is going to end sooner rather than later.

"HELLO CAR I AM LYLER."