"Twilight Sparkle, I suspect young Pipsqueak is likely to be a touch cranky when I awaken him from his nap. Would you mind locating Rarity?" asked Luna. "She intends to prepare you for tonight's feast."

I paused for a moment.

"The feast isn't me, is it?" I asked, only half in jest.

Princess Luna rolled her eyes and shook her glowing mane. "Perhaps figuratively, in a way. If you indeed elect to join the herd, we would gladly have our way with you—and as well, you have your way with us—with that ravishing body you possess spread out across the dining table as a feast for the senses. But neigh: drink blood though we may, we are neither carnivores, nor cannibals," she said. "Surely you do not think such terrible things of us, Twilight." I sensed a sadness behind her sarcastic exterior.

"Honestly, I don't know what to think anymore," I said, ignoring the 'ravishing body' nonsense. "Of course I don't really think you're that monstrous. Sun above, I don't want to think anything bad about my corrupted friends, least of all my brother. But I've been through Tartarus these past few weeks. Can you blame me?"

Luna looked me in the eyes and placed a gentle shoe on my shoulder. "I am very sorry for what you have endured, Twilight Sparkle. Moreover, I am sorry for what you must endure to come. I truly wish you were not fated to escape again," she said. "Hopefully you will not be gone from us for long. Your torment shall be at an end soon enough, and I shall most heartily welcome your transition to our side."

"Nopony can see the future, Luna," I said, hoping I could eke more information out of her with a bit of cleverness.

Why is she hiding her source from the other vamponies? Is there something important she's keeping from the rest of them? I still want to believe she's on my side, somehow...

"What you say is true. However, one mare's future is yet another mare's past," she said. She turned away from me with that, so I gave up and walked to the door.

I need to make a note here. Luna just heavily implied the use of time travel. Presumably, somepony has already seen my future. But who? I don't want to even consider it, but there's only one pony I can think of who might know my future right now, and I know she knows my future.

Princess Celestia.

Princess Celestia has advance access to the finished version of this Journal. Nopony else possibly could. If Luna is collaborating with her sister, I'm already doomed, unless Luna is secretly a double-agent, but... if that were true? I can't imagine she would do any of these disturbing things I've seen her do. Certainly she would be reassuring me in private, instead of begging me to join these nightmarish ghouls!

So maybe her source isn't Celestia after all. Either way, I need to figure this out. If I can make contact with Celestia again, perhaps in the dream world (although that would be entirely up to her, as I can rarely even gain lucidity on my own), I'll want to press her about this. Even though she's the only pony I know who is still on my side, she hasn't been perfectly forthcoming either, and it bothers me.

I stepped into the hallway and shut the door behind me. Master (I really shouldn't think that, let alone write it) Shadowbane was waiting there beside the door.

"Ah, Princess Twilight Sparkle. Come with me, my beautiful mare. I shall take you to where Lady Rarity awaits," he said, with his weird accent.

I'm not "your" beautiful mare. I thought better than to say it, of course, but the displeasure was no doubt etched on my muzzle.

He clearly caught my stare. "Please forgive me, Princess. I am not nearly as 'good' at the modern tongue as my... lady-pet," he said, the appellation timidly exiting from his lips.

I stopped and turned to face him. "Master Shadowbane—and I am calling you that only because it is your formality, not because I consider you to be above me or any other pony—I need to inform you of something," I said. "You are Princess Luna's inferior, in every way, and you always will be. You are not 'better' than her simply because you have a penis."

The look on Shadowbane's face was one of shock and sadness, and it slowly wended to resignation. "Princess Twilight Sparkle—"

"Just Twilight, please. I'm also no better than you simply by being a princess, even though I earned my title," I said.

I felt an Applejack-flavored fire in my belly I had long since missed. It felt like the plain, honest truth. A small grin crossed my lips.

"Twilight, then," said Shadowbane, with a nod and a half-smile. "On the point regarding Luna, I... I must concur. I know she would not wish me to speak ill of myself, but I could never hope to surpass her glory in any way. She dwarfs me. But I am told that you are the Princess of Friendship, and I would hope that you, of all ponies, should agree that it is not in the best interests of Friendship for me to place my Lady upon a pedestal."

I paused for a moment in confusion. "You... agree?" I said. "Then how does that reconcile with this 'Master' thing? It sounds and looks like you're the one on the high horse."

Shadowbane looked perplexed, and then he laughed softly. "Oh, no! Twilight, I think you have the wrong idea about all of this. Haven't your friends explained the nature of our new relationships to you?"

"Yes, but it never makes any sense. They keep telling me that I hear them but I don't understand them, and... well, I'm tired of playing these stupid games," I said, not looking him in the eyes. My voice sounded wounded, which was not my intent.

Shadowbane placed his hoof under my chin and propped it upward, and leaned his face close to mine. I felt like swatting it away, mainly because some part of me felt... it felt protective, like a touch from my brother. Before the creepiness, I mean. I don't want to feel safe with this pony.

"My brilliant, lost little pony. We must ensure this subject is broached in the conversation to come during the feast," he whispered. "I will do everything in my power to assist in your understanding. Of this, you have my word."

"...okay," I said, wincing and shutting my eyes tightly at the forlorn look he was giving me.

The nightborn pulled his hoof away and began walking down the corridor without me. For a moment, I considered going somewhere else, but I followed him anyway. We reached a large double-door. He knocked, and Rarity answered the door. Inside was a Princess Suite, one of the finest guest rooms in the castle.

"Twilight! Are you... doing well?" she asked me. Her mane and tail were extra curly. A sweet smile across her lips belied the nervous tension I could see in her face. Everypony in this madhouse was trotting on eggshells around me, like I was some sort of emotional powderkeg waiting to explode.

In fairness, I suppose that's about right.

I shrugged. "Kinda numb, I guess. My horn is constantly vibrating, which would be disturbingly arousing if it weren't a source of constant annoyance," I complained, stepping into the room. "Luna just went over the history of the vamponies with me, which still provides me with zero clue about why she, or anypony else, would voluntarily go along with your insane revolutionary plans. Oh, and Luna has a tiny foal sleeping in her bed, which is so sick I don't even want to think about it. I no longer expect answers. You're all just bucking nuts. Vampony equals insanity, and that's all there is to be learned."

Rarity pouted. "Don't be like that, Twilight. I'm certain tonight's dinner will help you to better understand our motives. I know you think we're... a few bolts of organza short of a wedding gown, shall we say. But you must realize your friends love you very much."

"Yeah, I know. That's the worst part," I said, and Rarity shut the door behind me. I noticed at this point that she didn't have her sheath on. Her stubby horn was visible due to the way she wears her mane. It was definitely growing, and it was close to a third of its original length. It would be at least a month before she could cast with it, though (probably two).

"Let's get this over with. What do I need to do to prepare?"

"We're going to get you freshly bathed and dressed. I still have the gown from the Crystal Kingdom, and it would be a shame not to use it again," she said.

I dropped my head low and grunted. "Ugh. Being reminded of that awful dinner is exactly not what I need right now."

"The problem with the last dinner is it erupted into politics starting with your dramatic complaint about somepony whistling approval at our appearance," said Rarity. "And yes, we all reacted very poorly and abrasively in response. It was churlish and stupid. Your brother is still kicking himself for that."

"He should be. That was the dinner I lost my brother, Rarity," I said, holding back tears.

Rarity pulled my head up and looked sternly into my eyes. "Twilight, you have not lost your brother. You cannot give up hope so easily. Please, let us show you..."

"I'm just tired of waiting," I said, and sighed, shaking my head. "I don't want to play dress-up. I just want to get each day over with so I can be unconscious again, because there's always a slim chance I'll dream of better days, or maybe this whole thing will just turn out to have been a terrible nightmare."

"Twilight Sparkle, you are the most Negative Nelly in the world right now. You can't say this adventure has been all bad," said Rarity, gently touching my cheek (I was tempted to recoil, but it felt nice, and I miss her). "Compare yourself to the filly you used to be two months ago. Haven't you learned anything valuable? Haven't you discovered a new bond with Applejack? With Rainbow Dash? Aren't those loving experiences worth something?"

I sighed and nodded. "Well... I'm actually grateful for that, yes. If things could go back to the way they were right now, except for my experiences, I would be grateful for all the horrible crap I've endured," I said, furrowing my brow. "All of this was actually worth it. I'm surprised to hear myself say that, but it's true."

"Good!" said Rarity, with a smile as she led me to an opulent bathroom. A jacuzzi was already bubbling, but she walked me toward the shower instead. "Things can't go back to normal, but they can get better. We want your input to change things. We want you to be a part of this, not a victim, but a contributor to our ideas."

"If you can explain why, and it makes sense, I'll consider it," I said. This was a fairly safe bluff. How could these frightening behaviors possibly have a rational basis? They can't. Simple as that.

Then again, maybe it wasn't a bluff. If Team Creepy actually made sense, I wouldn't need to fight. Celestia, how I wish they made sense. The fighting is just so incredibly draining.

Rarity helped me shower and scrub. I didn't flinch when she handled... those parts of me, probably because she didn't linger or attempt to molest me there. We were silent until I was clean, and then as she walked me to the tub, she answered me.

"I suspect many of your questions will be answered tonight, but the last bits of it will be handled tomorrow when we have audience with a certain 'noble'," said Rarity, the derisive scare quotes audible. (I wonder if it might be that nasty lout from the first Gala she attended, Prince Blueblood. I didn't care enough to ask, though.) Rarity covered her mane in one shower cap and her tail in another, since she'd already styled them. We both stepped into the tub. The water was hot and soothing, and I sat down on one of the ledges.

"I guess we'll see," I said, and I couldn't help a smile from gracing my lips. "Wow. This feels wonderful, but we don't really have time for it, do we?"

"We're here only for a few minutes," said Rarity. "I hope we can come back later, though. I miss spending time with you, and it is so lovely to see a smile on your face again."

"I'm a little tired, even after today's nap. After the feast I hope I can sleep," I said. "Maybe I'll have enough energy to write in the book first."

Rarity nodded. "Twilight, would you mind if I held you?"

"Please do," I said, surprising myself. "I still believe you care about me, in some twisted way, and I could really use a hug—"

She immediately latched onto me and pulled me deeper into the hot tub, her forelegs wrapped around me. One hoof gently stroked my withers. "Is this copacetic?" she asked.

"Thank you," I whispered. I was afraid I would cry, but I think the pleasure overcame the sadness.

"I don't want you to be uncomfortably horny during dinner, so I'd like to quickly satisfy you," she said, and guided me through the hot tub. I decided against fighting her. It felt too nice, and I was too tired to resist anyway.

I felt her back me up against the edge of the tub, where two jets were spraying beneath the surface of the water. Then she lined me up, and I shivered.

"Ah! Um, R-Rarity, the jets are right on my—"

"Your vulva and anus, darling? That's the idea. But it won't be any fun unless you unclench your muscles," she said. Rarity broke from the hug and stepped back slightly so her own rump was against another part of the hot tub. Her face was close to mine, and she looked into my eyes.

I understand why the rushing jet pounding against my clenched vulva was arousing. Duh. But the one stabbing my anus was also incredibly arousing... and why? That isn't what anuses are for! Is it subconscious perversion, infecting my perception? Still, the nerve endings there are so stimulating. Is this part of how sex works? Stars, I hope not.

"I'm..." I said. I had wanted to say 'I'm scared', but that seemed kind of stupid. I took an empty gulp of air. "Okay." I blushed and closed my eyes.

"My sweet, darling Twilight. Please don't hide those eyes from me," whispered Rarity, petting my face with a wet hoof. "If you open them, you can look into my eyes. We can watch each other climax. Wouldn't that be nice? I want to share this with you, if only you'll let me."

I opened my eyes, gritted my teeth, and unclenched.

The moment I stopped fighting the jets, I felt them enter me, and the sensations were thrilling. My jaw quivered as I looked at her perfectly made-up face. "O-okay, that's p-pretty amazing," I said, then gasped. Rarity smiled at me with a look of pride, and I could see her cheeks tensing and relaxing. Then I looked into her eyes, and within seconds I lost myself.

"You're so pretty when you're horny, Twilight," she whispered against my lips. I could feel the jets forcefully pounding into both of my... my holes, and my body shivered. I've never felt anything like this before. It wasn't as nice as being with another pony, but the inescapable forcefulness...

Oh my bucking feathers. Is this what being with a stallion is like?

With that thought, I came, and hard. Rarity beamed with obvious pride as I moaned aloud. "Good girl!" she said, then kissed me gently on the lips.

I'm pretty sure I came a second time. Holy Stars, it was incredible.

Shaky on my feet, I moved my rump to the side so I could recover from the experience. My genitals felt a little numb from all the pressure. I figured I'd just get out of the jacuzzi and allow Rarity to finish without me, but I didn't want to. It didn't matter that I was no longer horny. I still wanted to be with her. I never imagined I could enjoy sex without being aroused, but there I was, loving the experience of seeing my friend's face contort in pleasure.

(I guess this means I'm hopelessly perverted now, but I don't know if it's such a bad thing. Not this symptom, at least. Being able to share is nice, isn't it?)

Rarity held one of my hooves in hers, and staring into her eyes I could feel her slipping slowly into my heart. Figuratively, of course, but even then it almost felt physical. I loved another one of my friends, Journal. I still love her. Would I feel this way with Fluttershy, too? She's my only close friend I haven't been intimate with, even (sadly) counting Spike. I guess friendship and love aren't so different after all if you're as messed up as I've become.

No, wait. I've never been intimate with Princess Celestia, and she's definitely a close friend, even if I've kept her at leg's length. I feel dirty just thinking about the idea, though. I would never be worth her attention, and she can't possibly love mares. Maybe she can't love anypony, anymore. I know what she's said, but...

I need to stop thinking about this now.

I saw Rarity spasm and I heard her moan, and then I shut her up by planting my mouth firmly over hers. She pulled my tongue inside with her own vampony appendage, which wrapped tightly around my tongue and held it fast. I couldn't stop looking into her eyes, Journal. I might have never stopped, but eventually she released me and stepped forward for a gentle hug.

"Thank you, Twilight," she said, smiling as she stepped back. "You've come so far these past months."

I nodded. "Yeah. I guess I have."

We exited the jacuzzi and toweled off. I made sure to dry the furry ring within my collar. Then she walked me up to the sink and removed her shower caps.

"Is this dinner formal enough for makeup?" I asked.

Rarity clicked her tongue dismissively. "Darling, everything is formal enough for makeup. However, I think your brother would prefer you to be au natural," she said, even as she applied a tiny amount of makeup to my cheeks. "However, if you're wearing the dress again, we must complete the look." Rarity lifted a copper object that looked very familiar.

"Ah, one of those," I said, blushing. "Rarity, I really don't want to be distracted during dinner. I need to ask questions."

"No worries, Twilight. Once you sit down, it will no longer be distracting. I promise," she said with a motherly smile as she slathered the plug with a strange lubricant. "It's the same size as Spike's toy, which you've already had experience with. Now bear down for me, sweetheart. It won't hurt if you cooperate. The more you try to open your body to me, the easier it will be."

I frowned at the mention of my poor assistant, but I complied. She walked behind me and I lifted my tail. I felt it: wet, smooth, and cool, rubbing first at my dock, then at my 'ponut'. Rather than shove it in, Rarity took her time and gently massaged the rim in and out, ensuring my body had time to adapt. Oddly enough, it wasn't erotic. It felt more like exercise than foreplay, but it only took about half a minute of struggle. Finally she pushed much harder, and there was a brief moment of discomfort as it slipped inside and 'locked' within me, by virtue of its shape.

I exhaled, realizing that I'd been holding my breath at the end there. "Okay, I guess that's it."

Rarity carefully cleaned away the excess lubricant with tissues, then she reared up on her hind legs and took a gem and a hoof mirror back there. With the mirror, I could see it resting inside me, lewdly, like a decoration matching the rest of my accessories.

I feel something like a display case, to be honest. I wish I could say I didn't enjoy this.

The gem had magic illumination to it so that I could see what was emblazoned on the plug. It was my boyfr brother's cutie mark, naturally. Seeing that sent a twinge of pleasure through my nethers, which I cursed. Rarity twisted the plug until it was right side up, and I could feel my anus and insides tense and tug against it.

Then she slapped it once, and I gasped. "There we go! Now that wasn't so bad, was it?" she said soothingly. I just closed my eyes. I was emotionally drained, which I suppose was the point.

Now I suppose I might as well describe the dress that I avoided describing earlier in the Journal. Colt, howdy, as Applejack might say...

The dress is unchanged from the last time I wore it, except that she replaced the gold rings with copper ones, for obvious reasons. As I mentioned before, it looks something like a bridal dress gone mad. Previously I mentioned that I liked the ribbony braiding of my main and tail, and I still do. What I neglected to describe was how the braiding is done, which is the mildly disturbing thing. (I'd gladly keep the braids without the dress.)

Essentially, there's a headdress made of crimson silk and a small amount of deep orange organza, and the hair in my mane is woven into the organza mesh through holes designed for that purpose. It makes it look like a wedding cowl that has permanently fused itself to my head. The tail is similar: crimson silk buffets the croup, just aft of the saddle (which I'll mention in a moment). There's a dark orange organza through which my tail is woven, only this piece is stiffened into a crowbar-like shape, exposing my hindquarters for all the world to see (and what a show... but I'll get there soon). Again, I love the weave, I'd just prefer it without the fabric mesh putting me on display, because I am not insane.

The saddle is a dark violet pleather edged with crimson, resting on a bed of ribbony magenta and purple that match the stripes in my mane and tail. The ribbons tie around my barrel in a pattern reminiscent of a fink-style truss bridge, which I must admit is aesthetically pleasing. There's a saddle-horn made of the same material as the saddle, with crimson accents around the top and a thick copper ring through the tip. It might be coincidence (and I certainly hope it is), but I just realized the rings in both my saddlehorn and Rarity's have an inner diameter equal to the diameter of Spike's... um. Right. You get the horrible idea.

The inexcusably lewd part is the remaining attachment. Two dark purple pleather straps pass across my haunch, like a big X shape crossing out my cutie mark. The first of them goes from my saddle down to cup under my ass cheeks. The second one goes from my dock (it's connected to a copper ring which tightly encircles my tailbase) down to my flank. The second one ends in a soft magenta half-bra that pushes my teats caudally (that means toward the tail) without covering much of anything. It forces my teats to tilt toward my backside.

And that's not even the worst part. A third strap connects the dock to the midpoint of each of the other two straps. It separates my teats at the bra, joins with the first strap, and when it goes up the crack of my rump it finally separates into two straps which perfectly outline the dark lips of my vulva and anus. There's a soft padding between the straps and my ridges. So the colors are dark purple (the straps) on the outside, an inner silk padding of bright magenta, then inside that are my dark purple genital ridges. Within the anal ridge is the copper plug; within my vulva is (ugh) its usual light pink interior (which hopefully doesn't show, but I can't always control the 'winking'—none of that so far, thankfully).

Rarity clearly put a lot of thought into my genitals when she made this 'dress'. She must have been paying attention to what my pussy looks like even before she became a vampony! Why? I don't think I want to know.

I've already described Rarity's dress way back on the Day 42 (Attire) entry. It's as gorgeous as it is lewd, which is 'very'. So is mine, though you probably gathered that already, poor reader.

We spent about ten minutes dressing each other. Rarity said something about how beautiful I look, which I ignored, and then she left to the dinner. Shadowbane was outside the door, and he asked me to wait a few minutes so that I could make a proper entrance. So I wrote this portion of the entry, and he waited a little longer still. We're about to leave, so I'm setting you down here Journal. Don't go anywhere.