I'm still in the Pony Pile. I'm taking a break while I get caught up here, and in the meantime, Pinkie and Spike are, um... I'll get to that later.

So there we were, lying together on the pillows and blankets Pinkie brought from the upstairs area. Pinkie Pie cuddled up close against me, and then she pulled Spike on top of both of us. Spike was blushing fiercely. I had mixed feelings about the whole thing, but I decided I might as well try to enjoy myself. If Pinkie were to be believed, this is something that my friends did on occasion, so it couldn't be that bad...

"Okay!" said Pinkie. "Now after we met up at the tree, we headed off into the hills just northeast of Sweet Apple Acres while I explained stuff to you, and you told me all about your experiences with Cheerilee," she continued, gently caressing my cheek with one hoof and my barrel with another, which felt really nice despite the creepiness.

I should mention that, almost immediately, I was enjoying this a lot more than I thought I would. Not only sexually, but interpersonally: it feels amazing to be this close to somepony, especially a good friend like Pinkie Pie. And Spike too, sure. I'm surprised to admit it, but I think I would totally be down with a Pony Pile in a non-life-threatening situation. Maybe this is something I could actually be comfortable doing someday, when I'm not battling the forces of darkness or whatever. I mean, I could probably do without all the sexual tension, even though it feels... well, nice. Very nice. I don't like how nice it feels.

Pinkie continued her story. "You were pretty shaken up, Twilight. I felt super bad for you! Once we got over a couple of hills, we sat down and I hugged you and you were crying a little," she said, holding me closer with a gentle squeeze from the crook of her leg. "You told me that Cheerilee kissed you on the lips and that it was the first sexy-kiss you'd ever had and you were really ashamed about that, but I told you that was silly, and you shouldn't let something like 'who kissed you first' define who you are as a pony! So then I did this," she concluded, and smiled as our noses touched, muzzle to muzzle.

I knew it was coming. My heart was pounding in my chest, and as much as I didn't want what was happening to be either sexual or romantic, it was both. My eyes just stared into the bottomless wells of her soft, cerulean irises, and everything in me gave up all in one go. This is exactly what Applejack wanted to avoid, even though a big part of each of us wanted it to happen. She was afraid of two desperate ponies falling prematurely in love. Pinkie seemed to have no such fear, and I wasn't strong enough to fight it this time. So I just lay there beneath her, waiting for her to take whatever she wanted—anything at all, lest I undersell how personal this, this thing was—from me.

It felt like Pinkie was on top of me, holding me down, even though we were just hugging adjacent to one another. Spike quietly rested atop us, observing. Part of me was twitching, something inside my vagina? No. It was something outside my vagina, at the top of my vulva, just within the labia. It must have been my clitoris, because the feeling was like nothing I've had before and from what I've read the clitoris is the most sensitive part of the pony body. For about ten seconds I shivered in place. I think I may have been having little mini-orgasms or something. I just felt the pleasure up inside me in that "different place" and I couldn't stop it from going supercritical. It was like I had a tiny, thick little rod of pure magical energy jammed right into my body, somewhere up above my vagina, and everything around this imaginary lump would sing like Celestia's choir each time it throbbed inside me. And of course, my vagina, maybe I should say "cunt" but even now that seems too crass, so maybe, what did Cheerilee call it... pussy? Whatever you call it, it was drooling warm, wet, dribbling stallion-lubricating fluids onto the pillows and sheets, the wetness thick with pheromones that were affecting me and Pinkie Pie and maybe even Spike even though he's not technically a pony.

And that was just from looking into her eyes. My Stars. How do you fight something like this? Can you? Should you? The point I'm trying to make is that I didn't let go because it was a good idea; I let go because I had no other choice. I actually resolved I'd do whatever Pinkie Pie wanted me to do, which fortunately did not include betraying my friends or giving myself to my brother, but I'm afraid I probably would have. I was placing an incredible amount of trust in one pony, and the scariest part is that the fact she had control over whether or not everything fell to shit made me even hornier. It was insanity.

Pinkie must have noticed my internal struggles, the look in my eyes, maybe the love or the lust or both of them. I'm sure she smelled exactly how I felt, because I'm not a vampony (yet, anyway) and my own scent was overwhelming to me. She probably knew I was throbbing and unable to control my feelings, and she probably thought I was really, really confused. I guess I was, to be fair. I guess I am.

So she spoke to me. "It's okay, Twilight! You can enjoy yourself. I give you permission," she whispered with an enormous grin on her muzzle. For a moment, her words just hung echoing in the air above me, almost like one of Spike's comic books (not literally, of course, just in my mind). I felt like she was giving me permission...

No. It was more than that.

What Pinkie said was not the joke it appeared to be. I needed her permission to enjoy myself. And that's not all, either: I wanted her permission! Did I want her to take away my permission to enjoy myself, and then give it back to me? Dear Princess Celestia, that's it: that is precisely what I wanted! I wanted Flash Sentry to do the same thing, I'm sure of it, that's what this feeling is. I want to need permission to feel things! What the hell does that even mean? Clearly, this was, and is, completely bucking insane. Yet the more I was learning about my own motivations, the better the feeling got. I was pleasured to understand this sick thing about myself, to finally have admitted it. Somepony please stop me because I want more of this. I want it so badly it physically hurts inside, and even the hurting is somehow pleasurable.

Anyway, that's what I was going through, and of course I was shocked and confused and parts of me were spasming, and that's when she kissed me. She turned her head just a tiny bit to the side so our muzzles were off-kilter ever-so-slightly, and she pressed her lips to mine: hers, gentle and firm; mine, soft and trembling. I saw her batting her eyes at me as my own eyes fluttered closed, and I reached around to hug her to me, and I let her into my heart.

If this is what she did to me after my encounter at the barn, then wow. I can totally forgive Cheerilee for the stolen kisses, because this was just amazing. This is probably what Cheerilee was trying to do. But this time, instead of horrible it was wonderful, because it was something I really wanted, and I knew I wanted it. This was very different from the barn. I mean, it's still not really consensual, so maybe I didn't say I wanted it, and maybe Pinkie took advantage of me but she let me give in at some level and all I can think about now is that first kiss she gave me less than twenty minutes ago (that's a wild guess—I've lost track of time completely). I guess I must be some kind of lesbian or bisexual or whatever, but this pretty pink mare turns me on so much I can't even accurately describe what is happening to my body anymore.

I still feel guilty with respect to Applejack but I think that's probably a silly thing to feel at the moment, and I'm sure AJ would agree that it's silly (and Pinkie certainly would). Still, I keep wondering what would have happened if Applejack and I had kissed in that bed. I probably wouldn't have escaped the Crystal Empire. I'd probably be fucking my brother and my mother and father and Flash Sentry right now, maybe we'd all be doomed and I'd have Celestia's horn ramming deep into some part of me, hell maybe even Spike (might as well throw all sense to the wind and be a total pervert, right?) as they yank and tug my holes open like a used old sock. Dear Sun that is so fucking filthy I can't believe I just thought it up. Why is this turning me on???

Oh great. I think I just came again (should it be cummed?... came doesn't sound right). Pinkie and Spike are giggling at me. Pinkie says I make really cute sounds when I cum, and of course, that just makes me blush.

All this, and I haven't even started describing what we did.

This is taking way too long. Okay, I'm going to stop describing what's happening to my body from writing this entry, while I'm writing this entry, or else I'll be stuck in a slutty recursive loop forever which is probably not anywhere near as much fun as it sounds.

Okay. Pinkie Pie kissed me (there, that's the short version). Then she kissed me again, and again, and again, each time her lips against mine, lingering a little longer with each kiss. My lips kept quivering back against hers, but I did my best to relax and give in as much as possible, and she took the cue like a pro (which I suppose she is). Her kisses started to push playfully at my lips, down and outward, teasing them open. It seemed weird at first, but I let it happen, and she started to lick against my lips which should have been really disgusting (not to mention highly unsanitary), but it felt wonderful, and somehow I didn't care. I mean, a tongue is a tongue, right? Mine is in my mouth all day long, hers is no different. But it feels different. She slipped it into my mouth and used it like a little hoof, gently caressing mine with hers, and then my rear legs grasped her tightly as I had the third full orgasm of my life, or at least the third one I can remember.

Don't worry, I've stopped counting my orgasms. It's already too confusing to keep track of anymore, plus the missing memories make the accuracy of my counting highly uncertain.

So we kissed for a while or "made out" as it's apparently called, and Spike just watched from inches away. Then Pinkie kissed with Spike, and I didn't feel right watching that because Spike is still too young for this sort of thing (I was kind of powerless to speak after kissing with Pinkie); but of course it was erotic to watch, and on a deeper level it looked like Spike was experiencing the same thing I was in which case it must have been truly wonderful for him. I want him to feel that, even though I know he shouldn't. Spike is a best friend, a little brother, a roommate, the only male I know at all (apart from my corrupted BBBFF and father), and he's probably the pony I've spent more time with than any other pony alive. Why wouldn't I want him to feel this amazing inside? Is it actually that dangerous?

Pinkie withdrew from our last kiss, and a little line of spit dangled between our muzzles for a moment—which is gross, of course, but somehow it was cute at the same time—and then she smiled a really warm smile. I can't remember ever feeling this good in my life. I'm pretty scared thinking about it.

"There. That's not so bad, now is it?" she said, in a gentle and not-Pinkie-perky-at-all tone of voice.

I gasped and shook my head 'no' very gently. This was when I noticed she was rubbing my teats, even though I don't remember when she started doing it. I didn't want her to keep rubbing them, but I didn't want her to stop either, so I said nothing.

"Just one more kiss, okay? This is one we didn't do before," she explained, and positioned Spike in front of my face. Spike blushed like mad, but said nothing.

"Pinkie, no. I can't," I whispered, breaking out of my reverie for a moment. "This is wrong on so many levels."

"I'm okay with it, Twilight," said Spike, "but I don't want you to do it if you're the slightest bit uncomfortable."

"Spike, you and I are practically brother and sister!" I said.

"Yeah, I know. But a couple of years ago I started noticing how pretty you were, and well... I've thought about it," he said. "Besides, we did this once before, and you were fine then."

I took a deep breath and sighed. "I know. I'm sorry for what happened, too, just..."

"You don't need to make it a sexy kiss!" Pinkie interrupted. "Just try a brother-to-sister, gentle, 'I love you and care about you' kiss, right on the lips. Nothing wrong with that, is there?"

"There is when I'm starting to feel things for my baby brother," I whispered, deeply embarrassed. "Alright, just one light kiss, okay?" I relented. Spike smiled, and Pinkie gently guided him to my lips.

The problem: I was in no position to stop things from going any further. It did end up being more than a light kiss, and it lasted maybe half a minute, with just a little bit of licking but nothing too heavy. And yeah, while we were kissing, in my mind I imagined some things that I cannot forgive myself for.

Am... well, am I a pedofoal, Journal? I mean, I know Spike isn't actually a pony (being attracted to a nonpony creature is another horror unto itself to be completely honest), but still, he's a foal in all the ways that matter, and something about being this close to him is turning me on apart from the raw physical need itself.

It must be the vampony infection. There is simply no way this feeling could come from inside Twilight Sparkle. Same thing for Pinkie. I mean, Pinkie Pie wouldn't do this to Spike and I of her own free will, would she? Of course not. It's preposterous.

But there's a huge problem with this theory.

Spike isn't infected.

There are three possibilities, none of them good:

* There's something very wrong with Spike (psychologically). Of course I don't want this to be the case, but it's actually the least terrible of the three possibilities.

* Spike actually IS infected! But he'd have to be lying about it, or somehow unaware. We don't even know if dragons can be infected, so this all seems highly unlikely to me.

* The worst of the worst, but perhaps the most possible: once you've been corrupted by perversion, you remain corrupted—by which I mean naturally corrupted, under normal circumstances. This might be why Celestia has censored information, and if so, I'm not sure if I disagree fully. I mean like, being exposed to incest repeatedly can make you incestuous, even without the infection. This would imply that I'm a pedofoal now, and while we might be able to save Equestria, all of my close friends and family are essentially doomed.

There's nothing to be done about it now. I'm just going to hope there's something wrong (and fixable) with Spike.

Anyway, after the very wrong kiss, Pinkie showed me how to masturbate properly. She showed me a few different ways. I'll spare you on the gory details, Journal, but at least I'll mention the basics.

All of the methods rely on imagination (not to toot my own horn, but this is something I am very good at as a practiced mage), hygiene (same here), and "foreplay". That last thing means building up slowly to a climax (not always an orgasm, but that's a straightforward goal), kind of like a how a good book uses foreshadowing to set the mood. Foreplay can involve lighting, foreshadowing, and whatever makes you comfortable. In the context of solo masturbation, it might include an imaginative backstory, or just a slow approach.

The first method, sometimes called "clopping", involves clitoral stimulation. This is the one Applejack taught me how to do, so not much more needs be said here apart from the fact that it works, and it works really well.

The second method is called "hoofing" and it's exactly what it sounds like: hoof into vagina. I can't do this one because I still have my hymen (which Pinkie calls a "cherry"—does Applejack call it an apple, I wonder?).

The third method is only for experts. Basically you try to cum without touching yourself at all, or at least not your vulva. Pinkie tried to teach me these kegel exercises, but I already knew about them because I used them as part of my stretching routine for the running of the leaves last year. (It's hard to believe it's almost that time of year again!) I didn't try this one much because it was frustrating and we don't really have time for things like this at the moment.

Apparently, reaching a climax involves something of a paradox. According to Fluttershy, and backed up by Pinkie Pie, arousal requires activation of the sympathetic nervous system but climax requires a rapid shift into the parasympathetic nervous system. This means you have to be able to mentally relax, or you can't orgasm or even enjoy sex much. I'll bet this fact explains why so many fetishes seem to develop around sex, as well as my, um, "interest" in being told what to do and feel. I have to admit, it's very comforting to put a scientific explanation on all of this madness.

After all this we had a normal conversation. Pinkie was casually rubbing both Spike and I, and I was so exhausted from the sex I didn't mind at all (it didn't seem like sex, just cuddling I suppose). Pinkie wanted to show me "oral sex" which is undoubtedly just more kissing, but I passed because we're really short on time and Pony Pile or no Pony Pile we have work to do.

Er, wait. There was another conversation we had first which was far from normal. I should probably mention it first. While Pinkie and I were masturbating, Spike was watching and he became, well, horny. If you can say that about a dragon, much less an eleven-year-old dragon. Anyway, once we were done, I found myself staring at his "thing". He tried really hard to avoid touching it, which was a good thing, but it was pretty fascinating, partly because he has two of them, conjoined in a way.

"Isn't it adorable?" asked Pinkie Pie, which snapped me out of my inappropriate staring contest with a preadolescent dragon boner (Pinkie has mentioned that as a name for an erection, if I haven't already written).

"Ohmygosh! Spike, I'm sorry—I didn't even realize," I said.

"It's okay," said Spike, blushing but grinning. (Ugh, I think I was inflating his little ego more than his penis.)

"I'm just surprised you have, well, two of them. It makes sense, though. Dragons are sort of reptilian, and reptile penises evolved from the rear legs rather than the tail," I explained, trying to turn things clinical.

"I know! It's soooooo cool. Wait," said Pinkie Pie. "How could you be surprised? You saw us when we were in the hills..."

"Well, yeah, but I wasn't looking at it!" I said. "I mean, I tried really hard, even though I was too fatigued to realize what we were doing was wrong..."

"Not this again," groaned Spike.

"Arrrrgh. Fine, whatever. I didn't get a good look at it until now," I explained. "I don't know much about reptile husbandry, so I'd have to ask Fluttershy for more details."

"You want Spike to be your husband?" gasped Pinkie Pie. She looked ecstatic.

"NO," I said. "Husbandry refers to breeding of beasts, like reptiles. Like, I don't know how it works for urination or ejaculation or anything like that."

"Well, I only pee out of the left one," explained Spike. "I don't know about the jackal-ating thing, though. I haven't done that, from what Pinkie tells me, anyway."

"Okay! That is more than enough detail for Twilight Sparkle, moving right along," I said. I'm pretty sure I was blushing profusely.

Now comes the serious conversation.

"Alright, time for some questions, Pinkie. Nightwings are pegasus vamponies, just like Flutterbat, right?" I asked.

"Yes," said Pinkie. "Though Luna's guard were um, 'departured' nightwings or something? I forget what Fluttershy called them. It was a spell Luna used to tame them. They weren't infectious that way, and they didn't act like beasts like Flutterbat. Apparently they could still change forms to look like normal pegasi, but they prefer always staying in bat form."

"Probably 'denatured nightwing'. Wait: are you saying that in full vampony form, a normal nightwing pony becomes some kind of beast like Flutterbat?" I asked.

"Only at first, from what Rarity tells me," said Pinkie. "Once somepony has been a vampony long enough, they can control the horny feelings and think straight. I haven't had enough practice to do it yet, because I've been staying out of darkhoof form. I think the only ponies who have had that much practice are Luna's night guard, and maybe Fluttershy, but probably not her either."

"So our friends aren't transforming in private, either?" asked Spike.

"Nope! Except maybe if they're like tied down or something and it's kinky. But my intel on that is pretty old," admitted Pinkie. "Partial transformations are common, though, especially the fangs and ears and eyes. We have enhanced senses at all times, but the transformation enhances them even more. But you can't transform the wings until everything else is transformed, and the same is true for the other kinds of vampony."

"What does a bloodhorn look like? I'd rather not wait to find out for myself," I said, heavy on the sarcasm.

"Pretty much like King Sombra," said Pinkie. "Fangs, fuzzy ears, red eyes, and the horn turns blood red and smooth and it curves like a sickle. Not pointy, unless you sharpen it, which would be rude. Oh, and Rarity says the horn changes shape even when it's cut off, if the pony it came from transforms all the way. Which is pretty useful! Rarity says she had Big Mac tie her down and shove her horn up her own..."

"Pinkie!" I shouted. "Try to tune down the details a little in front of Spike. And in front of me, for that matter."

"Fine, fine," she said. "You get the point, though. Anyway, Rarity transformed after tab A was in slot B, and apparently it felt really good..."

"That is terrifying," said Spike, whose erection had finally withdrawn back to his genital slit.

"Hmm. Well I guess it's easy for the vamponies to keep from transforming, then," I said.

"Not really! It's kind of hard not to transform, actually. There are different things we have to do. Big Mac uses some kind of pretty purple flower, maybe lilacs?" she said. "It wasn't lilacs, but it was definitely purple. Rarity used to give me them until she found out I was a double-and-a-half agent..."

"I didn't see any flowers on him when he assaulted me," I said. "I assume you ingest it?"

"Nope! You just have to wear it on you. Mac pins it to his scruff, deep inside his mane where you can't see it."

"Weird. I need to do some research here, and ask Zecora if she can identify the flower. Or you could ask her," I said. "I'm kind of surprised you haven't thought of that, Pinkie, if it's hard to keep the vampony from coming out."

"Nah, there are other ways. Oh! That reminds me, you wanted to know about darkhooves, yes?" she said. "It's kind of hard to explain, so it's probably better I just show you..."

"When you show us I'll want to take notes, so can you two relax here for a moment while I get caught up on the Journal?" I asked.

"Oh we can totally chillax, right Spike?" Pinkie Pie said, and winked at him.

Yeah, that actually happened.

So I'm caught up now, and Pinkie and Spike are done making out (I swear if Pinkie weren't a vampony I would have knocked her unconscious by now). Spike is resting back on the cushions at a safe distance. Pinkie is standing up on the wooden flooring, and I'm squatting next to her since she said the hooves are what changes for a darkhoof. She's already let the ears and eyes and fangs take her.

I'm taking off her front left shoe, and holy Celestia. Okay. Her hoof just cleaved in tierce: two digits in the front and one in the back. Now it's splitting up the leg about six or seven inches; I'm getting a ruler. I can hear her bone cracking on the inside, and Pinkie is moaning in pleasure, and there's a red fluid coming out of the base, like blood but a lighter color and more viscous. Pinkie says not to touc__/^

Okay, that was weird. I just had to pull her freakish hoof off of my muzzle. Pinkie claims it has a mind of its own. It keeps trying to grab the ruler so I'll need to estimate by eye. Fortunately none of the hoofgoo (just what I'm calling it for now) got on me, because Pinkie says that would be bad, and I'm not about to experiment with "bad" at the moment. Her hoof is split into three long sections, and each of the three sections contains a series of "knuckles". The topmost one swings outward, and the rest swing inward. It looks like I can see into the bone marrow underneath because it splits into the bone itself, but there's a thin sheen protecting the marrow and outer bone, apparently. Probably a magic field? According to Pinkie, it doesn't hurt at all, and in fact feels good. Each of the three hoofoids (okay that's a really dumb word, but it works for now) has four knuckles in parallel. The lowest knuckle is actually part of the hoof, and maybe less than an inch from the frog, while the knuckles themselves are spaced evenly up the leg a little less than two inches between each knuckle and the next one up. The entire hoofoid is highly flexible as a result, and Pinkie's hoofoids are alternating between straightening to press against the flooring, and curling up and nervously tapping anything nearby (I've since pulled my muzzle and hoof back by a foot).

I'm going to take off the rear left shoe, but Pinkie is mumbling something about the shoes not being designed to hobble her but to prote—-

It's been about an hour since the last interruption. I have managed to scrape Pinkie Pie's cackling body off of the second-storey ceiling, and I've been able to put her to sleep with sedatives. Magic spells had no effect (I didn't try dark magic, however). She should be safely down until I can bring her back to normal, but I'm only pausing to write this briefly because I don't want to chance things, even though I've dosed her with enough horse tranquilizer to down a clyde twice Mac's size.

I had totally forgotten about the vampony tongue, but after being hit with it in multiple spots on my body, I never will again. Spike has come out from hiding under my bed. It's hard getting her shoes back on, as the hoofoids resist coming back together slightly even when she's unconscious. Spike says that when Pinkie took off her suit, she did it one leg at a time so she never had more than one shoe off. Oh bloody hell

Alright, now Spike has been subdued as well. Cutaneous contact with the hoofgoo induced a temporary involuntary transformation. This suggests that dragons might be infectable, which is not a good thing. My response to the transformation was so rapid I didn't have much time to note the changes; the moment I knocked Spike out, his body began reverting to normal (he seems fine now). Spike had the teeth and the eyes and the tongue, and he grew two blunt stubby horns, and the shape of his tail changed to something rounder and longer, but again I didn't wait to see where this was headed. Oddly, he didn't seem to get any larger or more threatening, but he did start to lose his mind.

I've destroyed most of the hoofgoo sample (fire works quite well for this purpose) and placed a small portion of it into stasis for later testing.

Pinkie Pie has been returned to her normal (i.e. non-darkhoof) form, but I think I'll wait for Pinkie and Spike to sleep for a bit longer before I wake them up.

Observations. "Vampinkie" is extremely dexterous, and extremely strong. She's like an earth pony on steroids. Anything she can touch she can manipulate with excellent precision, and this is not only the doing of the hoofoids. Her manumancy is off the charts: she was picking up books from half a foot away (and then launching them at my head). When bestial, she retains her sense of humor but it becomes very odd and primitive, and she's a lot more violent. I don't think she was actually trying to injure me, though. Her responses only became violent when I used a shield to prevent her from making physical contact with me, and even then they weren't deadly.

Her collar and shoes and earrings all bear Big Macintosh's secret mark. I'll need to talk to her about this.

Also, it took me a while to notice this, but before I got her shoes on all the way I noticed that her cutie mark had changed (it has since changed back). It was such a subtle change I didn't notice it at first. It still looked like the three balloons she normally has, except the bevel at the bottom of each balloon was missing and the strings were much, much longer and wrapped into tight coils. I have no idea what it means, but I'll leave a little bit of space here in case I figure it out later. Once all four shoes were on, her entire body reverted to normal form, including the cutie mark.

I'm taking a bathroom break, then getting a snack. Then I'll wake up my creepy friends and continue our discussion.

Princess Celestia, please save us.

Update. It's almost certainly horse sperm (confirmed by encyclopedia).