This is the reconstruction of the remainder of Day 43 (The Confrontation) which was ripped out of my journal. I began reconstruction of this entry on Day 47. I completed reconstruction on Day 47 .

Fluttershy and Rarity had recently emerged from their room to speak with me in the hallway.

Fluttershy shook her head, teary-eyed. "I don't understand why you won't even trust us just this once, when it really matters."

I felt anger rise in my breast. "Trust you, after the way you both acted at dinner? Are you crazy?"

Fluttershy reached out and touched my shoulder gently with a hoof. "We are the same ponies, Twilight. We're still your friends. We haven't lost our minds. The only thing that makes any of this controversial is there is a... process you must go through, but you will be so happy once you do! You will thank us for it. That's not an exaggeration. It is one hundred percent true." (More like a creepy motto, I thought.)

"You want to let mares get raped! Do you want to see your friends traumatized and suffering, Fluttershy? Is that actually what you want?" I said, growling.

"That's not at all what this is about," said Rarity. "Nopony is getting raped, Twilight. Period. There might be a lot of sex, but it's not rape when the participants assent."

"You mean consent," I said.

"No, assent. The difference is largely technical, but it means the ponies involved don't need to understand the consequences of their actions; they only need to want to take those actions," said Rarity. "Granted, in extreme circumstances somepony may not assent until after the sex has occurred. But eventual assent is guaranteed, with no lingering trauma. So that detail doesn't really matter."

"Ugh. Rarity, that's still rape," I said.

"Um, excuse me," said Fluttershy. "But last night, Applejack definitely didn't have your consent, Twilight. You'd never had sex before, and she didn't explain much to you. You had no possible chance of understanding the repercussions of your actions. Does that make her a rapist?"

I turned beet red. "How... how did you..."

"Well, you were both very loud," said Rarity, "but it's okay, it didn't bother us. We thought it was..."

"Adorable!" squeaked Fluttershy, with a silly grin. "We were so happy for both of you! You deserve to feel loved, Twilight, and so does she. We hoped the experience would help you get over your problems with—"

"We weren't that loud, and the walls should have muffled the noise!" I whispered. I think my eyes might have been watering up. I felt awful. I never would have... well, I don't know. I guess I would have done it anyway to help Applejack.

Rarity shrugged. "Well, first off, our hearing is more acute than that of normal ponies. Because of the, well, you know," she said, smiling. Her teeth appeared normal at first, but then her upper canines (tooth numbers 6 and 11, if you're a dentist) magically changed shape and lengthened slightly. Her fangs aren't very long, perhaps two centimeters in extension beyond the incisors, but they looked razor sharp and seeing the transformation sent a dreadful chill through my neck.

"However," she continued as her teeth returned to normal, "our abilities are irrelevant. You were still loud enough that anypony could hear. That paranoid spell you put up is probably to blame. I'd wager the detection from outside to inside made it easier for information to travel in the other direction... but, that sort of thing is your forte, dear."

Shit. She was right. How did I not realize that? I guess I was distracted. Okay, I was really distracted.

"Look, Rarity... I wanted to let Applejack do what she did. I mean, I let her do it, okay? I'm not going to be ashamed of it," I said.

Post-hoc: I meant it at the time, and four days later I'm actually not ashamed of it. Feels weird to write that down now, though. I think I've grown a lot more mature just over this past week. It's kind of like learning to swim by being hurled right into the deep end of the crazysex pool. I don't recommend it, but it seems to have worked in my case. To an extent, anyway.

"Yes, and you shouldn't be," said Rarity, "but that is precisely what makes it assent. You did the right thing, Twilight. You put the needs of your friend above your silly yet crippling personal issues with law-based morality. And now that everypony knows about it, it's a good thing. You can be free." (I don't really know what she meant by that.)

Post-hoc: I still don't understand that part, but as I'm rewriting this part of the entry, I notice something. I didn't want to admit it at the time, but they were absolutely right, at least for this specific case. Helping Applejack was the right thing to do, law be damned. That didn't mean it was always right, though. Team Creepy keeps talking like they have access to unique information which proves their case, but they won't readily share it with outsiders, so how can I possibly trust them? Friends shouldn't keep secrets this important from each other!

"Everypony?" I said, as the realization slowly crossed my face. "Oh no. The others! They must have heard us too," I said, feeling the color rush from my cheeks. Rarity and Fluttershy had sympathetic looks on their muzzles as I ran back into our room.

I caught Applejack as she was was toweling off in the bathroom.

"Hay there sugarcube!" she greeted me. "Y'know Twi, I hate to admit it, but I'm startin' to think this thing ain't so bad. I might even have it under control pretty soon. I still don't know why everypony's just givin' in to your brother because of it, it's just bein' horny and all, but..."

"Applejack, um... I wanted to give you a heads up," I said, interrupting her. "Fluttershy and Rarity heard us last night, and I think everypony probably did. I'm okay with it, though."

Applejack blushed pretty deeply, then she walked up to me, reared up, and gave me a soggy hug. "I am too," she whispered, "and you're the best friend a mare could ever hope for, Twilight Sparkle." I know I was blushing. Not breaking the hug, she pulled her head back and stared into my eyes for a moment, nose-to-nose. I started feeling that wonderful feeling again, like I would be forever lost in those beautiful, sparkling green discs, so I broke eye contact.

Post-hoc: Even just thinking about her as I write this makes me feel that way all over again. Journal... am I in love with one of my best friends? Can that even happen? Or is this all just confusion from everything that has happened to us?

I still can't believe I feel this way about another mare. It doesn't really seem wrong to me anymore, but it still feels pretty weird.

"I should go talk to Rainbow Dash and... oh no, Spike," I remembered. "Oh, this is not good. That poor little colt, I probably scarred him forever." My legs were shaking.

"I'll handle them. You take a load off here, or if you feel up to it, go get more intel on our vampony friends. Once again, you're bearin' way too much of the burden on your own withers, Twilight." Applejack walked out of our room.

I sat on the edge of the bed. I don't recall how long I sat there for. Maybe it was just a minute, or maybe it was the better part of an hour. I don't even remember what I was thinking about. Eventually, I was able to cope with how I felt. What happened needed to happen and it wasn't anypony's fault (except maybe whoever bit AJ). So I stepped out into the hallway. It was empty. I knocked on the Rarishy door.

Fluttershy answered, and lowered her gaze almost immediately. "Oh, hello Twilight. You can come in if you want to talk, of course. I... I promise we won't touch you, or hug you, or anything..." she said, a very sad tone in her voice. I don't really get it, but she always has a way to make me feel like their weirdness is my fault.

I decided to walk in. Rarity was taking a bath, and the bathroom door was already open. She motioned us inside.

"Look, guys," I said as Fluttershy and I walked in and sat next to the bathtub. "I don't really know how any of this is going to go down right now. In my heart I believe that somehow we're on the same side, and your friendship is more important to me than any level of discomfort. We'll get through this someday. We just have to." I sniffed a little, feeling emotional. Two of my closest friends... what was it that was separating us? Could it really be me?

Then I broke down crying in front of two vamponies—no, two friends. It's easy to forget how close we still are, despite the distance between us from whatever disease has changed them. Fluttershy asked if they could both hug me (true to her word), and I said yes, and we all did. It really helped: both the hug, and the crying. It was a "good cry", if that makes any sense at all. Before having friends, I had never imagined that crying could be a good thing. Well, it really, truly can.

I don't remember much of the conversation that followed, since I'm rewriting this and don't have access to the magic transcription anymore. I do remember that, at some point, Rarity and Fluttershy insisted that they had hard data proving they weren't hurting anypony. What they tried to explain wasn't making any sense to me, however, and I didn't have time to listen since I was still worried that we might need to escape. Also, I think I may have nitpicked about the use of the word "data" being plural.

Post-hoc: In retrospect I realize how dorky that was, and probably pretty self-centered, too. Neither of my friends said anything about it, though. My friends are all so forgiving of my faults. Without friends for so long, I've always been socially stunted, and even with all the gains I've made over the past four years I'm still not very good at social interactions. I remember when Pinkie Pie told me about how I sounded that time I came over to help her with the Cake babies. My behavior was just atrocious, and I had no self-awareness. That's the worst part. It's probably the source of a lot of my anxieties. I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop: to discover I've been doing something horrible for a long time, but only after it's far too late to mend...

I guess it's a good thing I never cared about how all the other foals used to make fun of me, or I'd probably be pretty fragile inside... I lucked out.

I left Rarishy and headed to the other room. Everypony else was there. I was very nervous, and so were Spike and Rainbow Dash. Pinkie was fine and Applejack seemed to be dealing with it well. Again, I don't remember specifics of the conversation, but I could tell Dash was really freaked out and trying to hide it. Her wings were sticking straight out the entire time we were talking. AJ said she'd explain something about pegasi to me privately, but being stationed in the middle of the Creeptastic Empire was not the right time or place for it. So it never happened.

Anyway, everypony seemed to understand how important what happened was for Applejack's sanity, so all my friends were okay with it. Spike in particular seemed really mature about the whole situation, and I think I've underestimated his maturity quite a bit. I was really glad he didn't seem to be emotionally damaged from the ordeal of overhearing his "big sister" having sex for the first time.

Post-hoc: Well... maybe it wasn't really such an ordeal after all? Maybe some of these things aren't as huge as I make them out to be, and as friends we could learn to be cool with something like this. I'm not suggesting, like, it should be okay to have sex in front of everypony, or something completely bonkers, but maybe this experience should be okay.

Should it? I think I'd like that. Does that mean I'm falling to the Spring Order? I don't know, but this particular feeling I have doesn't scare me. It feels right: not just emotionally, but logically.

We all packed our bags, and Spike tried to help Rarity with hers, but a couple of guards came by and said they'd heard we were checking out today so they would take our baggage. Flash wasn't one of them, and I sensed that was actually a Bad Thing. I insisted on keeping my saddlebags, and Applejack kept her lasso. It was pretty obvious that we were already gunning for a fight, and there was a lot of unspoken communication going on between everypony. The tension was so thick even I could pick up on it.

The guards told us that my brother wanted to talk to us one last time before we left, but if they hadn't led us to the throne room I would have felt compelled to go there anyway. I owed my brother that much, even after everything had gone so sour. I know he's still in there somewhere, deep inside that shell that looks like Brother but isn't Brother. He has to be. I will not give up hope on my BBBFF.

The guards opened the door and the seven of us walked in. After we walked in, the doors were closed behind us. Prince Shining Armor and Princess Cadance were seated on their thrones at the end of the hall, facing us, just waiting.

From this point forward, I remember things very clearly, and have no choice but to put in all of the gory details.

"Okay, gang, huddle time," I said. Six heads met in a ring, and Spike hung out beneath and between Rarity and I.

"Um, Twilight?" Dash immediately asked. "I don't think we're all on the same side here," she said, gesturing rudely toward Fluttershy and Rarity.

"Oh, um, we can leave," said Fluttershy. "I g-guess we just thought, in case you wanted..." she continued, her voice trailing off.

"No, you guys can stay," I said, much to Rainbow Dash's frustration and a curious look from Applejack. "I don't think it really matters much anymore and nothing said here is a secret. Besides... we're all on the same side in some bizarre way, so if we part ways, we do it as friends."

"I don't think that's a wise idea, but I will respect your decision, sugarcube," said Applejack.

"Thank you Twilight," said Rarity. "It may be a simple gesture, but means a lot to both of us."

"I bet this is going to be SO MUCH FUN!" Pinkie Pie excitedly squealed. Rainbow Dash groaned in response.

I cleared my throat for attention. "Alright, here's the plan. I'm the strongest weapon here, so I'll take point. Rarity and Pinkie take my left flank, pegasi on my right, and Spike and Applejack cover the rear. That way if we can't count on Rarity or Fluttershy, um, no offense guys..."

"None taken," said Fluttershy.

"...then my flanks will still be covered," I said.

"Sounds fair, but I think I should be on that door already. We saw zero guards on the way here which is a bad sign. I'd bet half a season's harvest they're gonna line up a whole army behind us, so we need a barricade right now," said Applejack.

"Okay, that's a really good idea AJ. Are there any final comments?" I asked.

"I'm scared, Twilight," said Spike, and a concerned-looking Rarity petted his head with a hoof.

"I think we're all scared, Spike. I need you to be strong, okay? We're going to get past this," I said.

"Pfft. Comments?" said Rainbow Dash. "I think you mean famous last words. Let's just walk up there and kick your creepy brother's ass already! Oh, and Fluttershy, you'd better not start preening me when I'm standing next to you or I'm holding Twilight personally responsible."

"I promise to respect your boundaries, Rainbow," said Fluttershy.

"Okay then. On three, everypony break. One... Two... Three!"

All of us advanced except for Applejack, who remained at the doorway. She grabbed two long steel candlestick holders and thrust them between the door handles as a makeshift barricade, then tied the handles together tightly with her lasso. Applejack's on-the-spot ingenuity has always impressed me. (For someone with less "book-learning" than some ponies, AJ is surprisingly smart. Knowing her as a pony has corrected stereotypes I used to believe about earth ponies, just as knowing Rarity has corrected old prejudices I once had about fashion and beauty.)

As we approached the round stage upon which the thrones sat, the Prince and Princess stepped off of their thrones and quickly descended to the main floor. There they stood, waiting for us to come closer. We got most of the way through the hallway before I signalled for everypony to stop. The royals were perhaps ten meters away from us. Not exactly speaking distance, but this wasn't exactly going to be a polite conversation either.

"We're glad you came to say goodbye, Twilie," said Brother. He looked very tired, though both of them were very well-dressed, as though this were some sort of political negotiation. I guess in a way, it was. It was clear that this impasse was taking as much of an emotional toll on him as it was on us. Cadance was silent, but appeared very alert.

The one weird thing (well, new weird thing) was that Princess Cadance wore a golden collar, and through the ring at the front was linked a pastel-pink colored... I guess it was a leash? And her husband was holding the other end of the leash. It was disgusting and demeaning, of course, but I'm too curious for my own good. I really wanted to understand why anypony would do this, just in case "insanity" wasn't the only reason. So, for the briefest moment, I thought about Applejack holding me in place with a leash and collar... and I felt giddy pleasure tickle my nethers.

Post-hoc: Let me be more specific. It was intense pleasure, and it frightened me. Obviously, everything about being held on a leash (like a dog, or some kind of mindless beast) is entirely wrong. I still don't understand why it feels so good just to think about it. Maybe it's the idea of belonging to somepony? Like, if Applejack (this is weird) "owned" me in some sense, then I'd get to be with her forever or something. But that could go both ways and it doesn't feel the same both ways in my mind. It does feel kind of nice to think about me holding her on a leash, but it's still not as nice as...

Wow. I really have to stop thinking about this weird stuff. This is way too far outside the realm of intelligent and rational thought, even for love.

Well... maybe.

Pony, I am so freaking weird at this point, I might as well own up to it. I guess I might already be doomed.

I wisely decided to put the leash out of mind entirely. I tried my best to ignore Cadance's "collar accessory".

"Oh. Well, I'm glad we came, too," I said, after a rapid return trip to reality. "But it still doesn't change much between us. Where do we go from here?" I asked.

"What are your plans?" he asked me. "Do you still blindly oppose us at every turn, or are you willing to offer us a token of trust?"

I paused for a moment in thought. "Don't listen to him Twilight!" said Rainbow Dash, her wings high, her body crouched low. She was a coiled serpent, just itching to strike. I was very thankful to have her on my side.

"I don't mind giving you some benefit of the doubt, Brother," I said, "but everything you've said and done since we arrived has been very disturbing, so it will take time to convince me. Time is not a luxury I currently have. I must tell Princess Celestia what I've seen and heard. I'm sure she'll be willing to talk to you about things, and we'll reach a peaceful resolution..."

"Princess Celestia," Cadance spat, putting special emphasis on the title, "will overreact. Everypony involved will be in danger. We will be locked up, as will your friends, not for anything any of us have done, but merely for who and what we are. Celestia is the last pony in Equestria you should be talking to about this."

"Of course we'll talk to Celestia eventually," said Shining Armor, "but for the safety of your friends, and I mean all of them, we need this to be kept in confidence. If you're willing to stay a few more days, I'm sure we can convince you that nopony is going to be harmed."

"There's an army back here, alright," said Applejack. "I can hear them gatherin' in some kinda formation. There ain't much time for decision-makin', Twi, but my lot's still with Celestia."

"I'm with AJ," said Rainbow Dash. "I mean, duh."

"I'm with you Twilight, whatever you decide," Spike said, as he kept an eye on Applejack and the door.

"Oh, me too Twilight!" said Pinkie Pie. "I'll let you do the thinking stuff this time. Just for a change of pace."

I stood there for a moment in thought, burning precious seconds to make the decision certain.

What would have transpired differently, had I agreed to stay for a few more days? I can't say, but my gut told me I couldn't trust Shining Armor anymore. I now know that my gut was right.

"I'm sorry, Big Brother. We can't stay here," I said. "We're leaving to meet with Princess Celestia, and then we can all meet together as a group and talk about this. I'm sure everything will work out fine."

Shining Armor lowered his head and sighed. "Twilie, I'm begging you. Please. Just three more days, and I swear it will all make sense."

"No. I can't trust you anymore, Brother. I'm sorry," I said, my voice wavering slightly.

"Twilight, if you won't listen to him, then please, at least listen to me," said Princess Cadance. "I'm not just your sister-in-law. I was your foalsitter, and in a way, I was your first actual friend. I will not lie to you. If you take this course of action, all of your friends will be in grave danger, and so will you."

"Oh, please," said Rainbow Dash, rolling her eyes. "You think making veiled threats is going to get Twilight to change her mind?"

"I don't think they're threats, Rainbow," I said, reaching out with a hoof to her shoulder to calm her down. I turned my attention back to Cadance. "Sister-In-Law, I believe that you believe what you're saying. You have been like an older sister to me. But Princess Celestia has been like a second mother. Ever since I earned my mark, she's been there by my side, teaching me and guiding me. She's done the same for you, though perhaps not to the same extent. If there's anyone I trust right now, it's her, and I don't understand why you would think she could possibly let anything happen to my friends."

"Princess Celestia isn't my mother, but I look up to her like one," said Spike, turning around to face Cadance while maintaining his position behind me. "You're wrong about her. Twilight will tell her that this needs to be kept quiet, and then we can all meet together."

"I, too, love Celestia like a mother," said Princess Cadance. "However, since I took the throne here I have learned a number of disturbing things. She's ancient, Twilight. She's not in touch with most ponies and what they need. She doesn't even recognize her own problems. You know about the other Equestria. You know Celestia almost destroyed both of our universes because she maintained a love affair with Alternate King Sombra for more than a thousand years. Do you really want to trust her when it comes to matters of the heart?"

"She made a mistake," I said. "It was a mistake anypony could have made, even if it lasted for over a millenium. I..."

I looked back at Applejack and breathed a heavy sigh.

"Listen... I know about love now, in ways I never really thought possible," I said, softly lest I reveal the fragility of my mood. "I know that love, and even just sex, can make ponies do dumb things sometimes. I think that's what is happening to you both right now. But we can't move forward while you're both in the closet about the vamponies and the nightwings and the weird sex and everything else."

"Nightwings are pegasus vamponies," said Shining Armor, "no more, no less. Fluttershy was just the first nightwing to bear the magical infection. I know this is kind of irrelevant, but I wanted you to know. I want to tell you more things, but those things take time and you aren't willing to offer it to us."

Princess Cadance nodded in agreement. "There's more she isn't telling you, Twilight," she said. "Other secrets hidden from public view; many more secrets on her side than on ours. Secrets about the study of magic. Things I have learned since we moved here, learned through study from our unexpurgated library archives. Things I have proven by experimentation. Stay, and I can show you. You'll be stunned."

"Well, I'll talk to her about that. I agree the secrecy can't stand. But not on your side, either," I said.

"If our secrecy doesn't stand, then ponies will be hurt. Ponies may even die," said Shining Armor. "That's what we're trying to prevent. Please, please Twilie. Don't take a brash move now with the lives of your friends on the line."

I paused for a moment. I understood the consequences of what my brother had just said, but I didn't want to believe it. Even after all signs pointed here, I didn't want to believe, but... The battle lines had just been drawn.

"You would never put us in that kind of danger. So... you're not going to let us leave the city," I deduced.

Brother shook his head, sadly. "I didn't want to lie about keeping you here, but we can't let you endanger your life, the lives of your friends, and the lives of everypony in Equestria. We know with great certainty that Celestia will immediately break our secrecy. So, no. You can't leave here. Not as long as your goal is to blab everything to the Princess."

I stated the obvious. "You know I have to oppose you."

He reared upright. "I know, Little Sister. Neither of us has been looking forward to this moment." As he stood there, his pe—no, I want to do this right; his cock emerged from its sheath and thickened. He seemed to have perfect balance on two legs, and somehow he was horny even in this emotional situation.

Post-hoc: Is my brother a vampony too? I think I want it to be true, because it would help explain his behavior. If he were telling the truth about the nightwings, it would almost be a certainty that he had been infected. But what was causing the irrational submission of my friends, if not the vampony infection? The thing in the box? But that doesn't add up, either. I almost submitted completely to my parents, and that was before they'd even showed it to me...

The look on my face must have belied my willingness to engage in magical combat, because my brother smirked at me and said, "What's wrong, Twilie? Intimidated by a mere stallion? Never seen a dick before?"

I had never taken a close look at my brother's... okay, dick, before. It always bothered me that colts were so different down there, and now I was almost face-to-face with it. It was a good thing Shining Armor stood almost a dozen meters away from me, because it was truly distracting to look at. It bobbed in the air slightly, as though it had a life of its own. It was long, and dark grey, and nearly as thick as a leg. It looked muscular, even though I knew that's not how it works. The shape was strange, but it tripped a primal sense within me. Somehow, by evolution or magic or something stranger still, I knew what a pony's dick was supposed to look like. I found myself lost in thought. Since it's filled with blood, it would have to be very warm. What did it feel like to the touch? What did it smell like? What did it taste like? I mean, these thoughts are insane, nopony's ever going to "taste" somepony else's penis, right? But I couldn't get it out of my head. I couldn't get him out. And worst of all (it's hard to admit this even now), I was starting to feel a little bit aroused.

My brother was getting in my head with surprising ease. I needed a snappy comeback.

"Well, I'm looking at a dick right now!" I said. There was a moment of silence, then Cadance and Pinkie Pie both broke out laughing.

"Thank you, Twilie. I'm glad you like it," Brother said, grinning.

"Wait, what? Shit! I didn't mean it like that," I said angrily, blushing at the same time.

Rainbow Dash facehoofed. "Ugh. Twilight, please stop trying to make jokes," she said.

"It's okay, Twilie," said Shining Armor. "I know you were trying to call me a 'dick', and it backfired. But you don't realize that 'dick' isn't a bad word. Not to me. Neither are 'stallion', nor 'male', nor 'guard', nor 'brother'. All of those things are good things, Twilie. Males are every bit as important as females."

"I never said they weren't," I said. "It's not the fact that you have a... a penis, it's the fact that you are thinking with it, instead of with your brain. You know I love you, Brother. In fact, I used to think 'brother' was one of the best words in the dictionary, before you lost your freaking mind!"

My horn began to glow like fire, and—

Post-hoc: Oh wow. I am way too exhausted to finish the entry now. I forgot how long it was, and my rambling throughout isn't making progress any easier. I'll have to add Part 1 to the title, and continue this after a nap. My neck is still very sore and I still haven't slept since surviving my incestuous family (it seriously gets creepier the more I think about it, so I'm trying not to) and casting the temporal spell.