I was on my side, facing away from the Doctor. I couldn’t look at him at the moment. I felt too embarrassed. I was okay with it. I had chosen to do it, and I didn’t regret it, but we had just been through the most intimate of things a couple can do. I had fully exposed and given myself to him, so I was just feeling a little self-conscious at the moment.

He began to stroke my mane. “Are you okay, Derpy?”

I heard his voice, but it felt so far away, just like before. I was too lost in thought. My mind felt all scrambled.

“Derpy?” Again his voice. Although I heard his words I still couldn’t respond to them yet.

With his other hoof he began to rub my stomach. I liked that. He kissed my neck up and down, making me shiver, before he put both hooves around me and hugged me to him. “Helloooo? Anybody home in there?”

I pushed myself more firmly against him, enjoying the contact, but I still couldn’t face him. I still needed some time to think. I was still coming down from the emotional high of what we had just done.

I could say one thing about it, though. It was definitely a much different and better experience than the one I had with Shooting Star, and for that I was truly grateful. Shooting was very rough with me, treating me like an object instead of a lover, not caring about making the experience enjoyable for me. It was only about himself. At the time I didn’t care about that, because I loved him so much I wanted him to have the most of me, but it had hurt a little, and I was sore the next day.

Doctor Hooves, just like always, didn’t go right for the kill. He was very patient, as he always was, slowly warming me up. Kissing me and tickling my ear and rubbing my stomach, never rushing ahead of my comfort zone. He waited for me every step of the way, making sure the both of us got the most out of everything. It was an amazing experience. I’m happy I did it but, well, I was just discomfited. I wondered whether it had been good for him, if I could have done more. As he continued his rubbing and gentle kisses that question seemed to become unimportant. I pushed a little harder against him, maximizing the contact.

“Hold me tighter,” I said, the first words I had spoken since we had finished up.

“Of course, my love,” he replied, giving me a big squeeze. He kissed my ear and the back of my neck, and I let out a big sigh. “Are you okay, Derpy?” he asked again.

I nodded. “Yeah. I… I think I am.”

“How are you feeling?”

“Fine, I guess. I still need a little time to process things.”

“I understand. Take as much time as you need. You know I have no trouble with waiting.”

“I know.”

The two of us sat there unmoving for a while, his big, strong hooves around me, my protective warm blanket surrounding me. He just held me tight, planting kisses all over my neck.

“I-I’d kinda like to… to-to-to turn around to kiss you too. I’m so, so sorry, but I’m starting to feel afraid again.”

“Of me?”

I felt a tear come down my eye. “I’m sorry!” I said again, starting to shake a little as some tears came down my face. “I’ve done my best to rid myself of the past and what happened, but it’s still affecting me. Even now. I’m scared that when I turn to look I’ll be looking into the cold eyes of Shooting Star. I trust you. I do! I trust you enough to give myself to you and marry you, but now that we’ve done it there’s no going back, and I just feel scared that things are going to end the same way they did with him.

“Please don’t be mad at me! I don’t want to feel this way.” I started feeling disgusted with myself that I STILL couldn’t completely let go. “P-p-please… don’t stop loving me. I’m sorry…”

His only response was to hold me tighter and just continue his gentle kisses. He let out a little laugh. “Oh, Derpy, you little sillyhead. What am I going to do with you? Did you think THAT was going to rattle me? I know those feelings are just temporary. I was expecting you to have some sort of negative reaction when we were done.

“Just keep in mind how much support you really have. I told you six months ago I proposed to you in public on purpose, so I couldn’t escape the consequences if I ever went back on my word to you. If I wasn’t prepared to weather the storm I never would have committed myself to you. And after having our vows witnessed by a princess and having all four alicorns attending do you really think I’d be crazy enough to abandon you? All of Equestria would be after my head.”

He kissed around my ear, saying, “You know, Dinky told me there was something you told her that always makes her feel better when she’s down. She said you told her you love her no matter what happens. Through the good times and bad, when you’re loving and cuddling up, or when you’re yelling and arguing. Even when you don’t want to talk to each other and you’re both at your worst you still love her beneath it all.

“And that’s the way I feel about you, Derpy.” He stopped his gentle kisses and slowly nuzzled his face against my cheek. “When I proposed to you I was determined to take it all the way. Specks of your past are still clinging on to you, weighing your spirit down, but I’ll be there every day to apply some wax and cleaner so you stay shiny and bright. Of course there will be points where we’ll be at our worst, but just like with Dinky we’ll always come back together with some time.

“I understand your fear and pain, and I’m not going anywhere. Short of sleeping with another stallion I don’t think there’s much of anything that would cause a lasting wound to our relationship. So don’t beat yourself up, Derpy. My heart is with you, always and forever, until the end of time. That was my vow to you today, and it didn’t stop being valid just because we’re no longer at the hall.”

I took a few deep breaths. Trust was a tricky thing. I always felt so wishy-washy lately, never knowing if I wanted to head towards it or away from it. I lifted my hoof, putting it on my ring. There was just something relaxing about it, carrying around a symbol of his love I could show the world. He trusted me and understood me better than I did, prepared for my reaction. He never faltered or shrank away from our love, and I knew I had a ways to go to match his level of commitment. The very least I could do was to show him I trusted him too.

I closed my eyes, taking a few more deep breaths, and then I forced myself to turn around toward him. My heart fluttered in that instant as I opened my eyes, hoping that I wouldn’t see my deepest fears come back to haunt me, see that cocky condescending smile looking down on me.

I let out a long deep breath as I gazed into his eyes, seeing the same loving expression I had seen so many times.

“Hello, beautiful,” he said, giving me a peck on the nose.

“Thank goodness,” I said in a croaky voice. I put my hooves around him as well, pulling him close to me as I kissed him on the lips. “Thank goodness.” I sank into his hold, snuggling in close. “You’re really my hero, you know?”

“I know, Derpy,” he said gently, rubbing my back. There was no ego behind his agreement. He just took it in stride. “I’m your hero, here to protect you in your lowest moments. I know I said this out in public, but as you know a public display can also be just a ploy for attention. You’re my one and only, Derpy. I won’t let anyone hurt you as long as I’m alive. I’ll do my best to be a father figure for Dinky, and to make sure you never want for anything. And I don’t just mean material things like food. I mean the important things too, like love and support and being a dear friend. I know it may take years to fully and completely earn your trust and for you to truly leave your self-image of the bullied filly in school behind, but it’s time well spent.”

I felt another stab of pain. “Doctor, I DO trust-”

“Shhh.” He put a hoof on my mouth. “I told you already I understand. We just mated, and I know that has been a sticking point in your fears. Shooting abandoned you at six months, so you assumed I was going to do the same. He left you for the same thing we just did. We’ve been friends for a long time, but we’ve only been a couple for a year. I know you’re going to need more time, and that’s okay. So long as you don’t give up on me again I don’t have a problem being patient. Your hesitance doesn’t bother me, because as more time passes you’ll see with your own eyes that I’m not going to leave you just because I was able to have your body. Like I told you before I do think you’re beautiful, and I love your body, but it’s not what drew me to you.”

He lifted his hoof, putting it on the back of my head and pulling it towards his. Forehead to forehead now he said lightly, “Are you feeling alright now, my darling?”

I looked into his eyes, so close to mine, and I said, “Yes.” Lifting my hoof I continued my usual habit of touching my wedding ring. “You’re here now, with me, because you choose to be. You’re the other half of my heart, and I couldn’t imagine life without you. I don’t think you’ll ever hurt me like Shooting did. You’re so kind and gentle and slow, always making sure I’m comfortable before moving yourself."

I let out a sigh. “I just wish I could be as committed as you are.”

He ruffled my mane. “No more of that, Derpy. No more putting yourself down. I don’t have all the trauma and drama in my past that you do, so it’s only natural that it will take you a little longer than me. So smile for me, Derpy. Let me see that beautiful face light up like the sun.”

I couldn’t help it. I giggled. He was just so easygoing. He never made me feel pressured to do anything, which allowed me to be myself around him. I flashed my teeth at him, then said, “I WILL get there one day. That’s my private vow to you. I can’t do it right now though. Like you said before I’m still scraping off the rust of my bullied fillyhood, but I’m not that same teenager I was back then. I’m a mother of a wonderful girl, and now I’m a wife, the luckiest mare in the world.

“In a way that bit of sadness was good. No day is perfect. That’s why I was on the verge of a panic attack at the reception. I kept waiting for that certain something to go wrong. Now that something bad finally happened I can rest with no worries.” Pulling back a little I yawned. I rubbed my eyes a little, but it didn’t help much. “I’m getting sleepy. Watch over me?”

He put his hooves around me, pulling me closer once more. “Of course, sweetheart.”

“Will you still be here in the morning? I don’t want to start worrying.”

That got me a hard squeeze. “Yes, Derpy, I will. There’s no place else I’d rather be right now than right next to you, making you feel safe as you drift off to sleep.”

I nuzzled his chest a few times before putting my head around his, closing my eyes. “Good. You make a nice pillow. Nice and warm… and comfy.” I let out another big yawn.

“Goodnight, Derpy,” said Doctor Hooves, giving me one last kiss before snuggling in closer.

I could feel him around me, his big strong hooves keeping me safe. I felt so protected, so cozy, snug up against my lover. I wasn’t afraid anymore.

“Goodnight, Doctor,” I said as I closed my eyes, drifting off to sleep in the hooves of my lover, ending the best day of my life.

Author's Notes:

Thank you all for reading this story through to the end. I know it's been a long three months, with some long gaps here and there. This story exploded from it's original plan of 3 chapters(ending with Derpy/Dinky resolving their issues), to becoming a romance novel. For my first attempt at romance people really seemed to like it, which makes me happy.

For the curious I DO have a sequel planned for this story in the future, dealing with the married life and Derpy being pregnant, but I have some other projects to work on before I come back to this one.

SUPER HUGE shout out to my girl Crimsion Ink, who has been working tirelessly for me, surprising me with fan art, helping me make up my mind when I'd get stuck on how I wanted things to go, giving me inspiration for new chapters(3 chapters alone were inspired by simple comments she'd leave) This story wouldn't have come out as long as it did without her input. She drew me a TON of fan art for this story, like 20 fully colored, which I still have to place in their appropriate chapters.

Thanks you so much!