Edited by JimboTex

Kye was lost in thought as Lyra led him away from the town square. The abrupt change from brightest day to blackest night had completely freaked him out. He couldn't get over how powerful Princess Celestia was, having just watched the alicorn goddess manipulate the fucking sun as if it were nothing more than a ping pong ball.

On emerging from the wooden building, she had trotted up to Lyra without a care in the world and asked the pretty unicorn if she would allow him (a big, freaky alien no doubt) to stay with her. Kye had been mortified. She’d mentioned it to him when they’d been inside, but he’d had no idea she would just up and blurt it out in the middle of a crowded town square.

He’d waited for an answer with bated breath, unable to read the expressionless unicorn. To his astonishment Lyra had actually agreed and they were currently making their way to the house she shared with her roommate.

“So, how does your strange machine work?” Twilight, the other unicorn, asked.

Fluttershy had introduced her to him and they’d been making idle small talk as they walked. Kye glanced at her; she was gazing at him with the same look of polite interest as before. She had a neatly cropped purple mane and tail each incorporating a solitary pink stripe. Her cutie mark was a large pink star surrounded by five smaller white ones.

Kye cleared his throat and started to explain. She listened intently and seemed rather impressed when he finished.

“A hybrid system? That's clever.” She looked at his ride, surrounded by Lyra’s amber glow.

“How does the engine work, then?” she curiously asked.

“Well, basically, a precise mixture of fuel and air is injected into a set of four cylinders, each cylinder containing a piston and a spark plug. An electric current is sent from a central processing unit along a set of HT leads and into the spark plugs, igniting the mixture causing a dramatic increase in pressure which drives the pistons.” Kye was really getting into his stride; he loved talking about his fancy engine. “In a normal engine the pistons usually fire two by two, driving a normal crankshaft which then transmits the kinetic energy through a transmission, drive chain and finally the rear wheel. In this engine however,” he pointed to his hovering ride, “the electrical signals are sent in an irregular pattern to fit in with the crossplane crankshaft design which greatly improves mid range performance.”

He’d expected the unicorn to be quite clueless as to what he had just said, so he was more than a little surprised when her face lit up with understanding.

“Ah yes, that would explain the distinctive growling sound it was making before!” She turned to Kye. “Let me guess, this fuel contains chemical energy—probably stored in the form of hydrocarbons, right? They then exothermically react with the oxygen in the air, creating heat, light and sound. A little inefficient, but effective nonetheless.”

Kye was impressed—he’d never imagined a pony could be so…scientific. A thought suddenly occurred to him.

“Does Equestria have any fuel in the form of hydrocarbons?” he asked hopefully. If he was stuck in this odd equine universe, he sure as hell wanted to keep on riding. As good as the battery was, it would only get him so far.

“Well…Yes, but its quite rare. Fossil fuels aren't widely used in Equestria, since ponies tend to just use magic to create energy.”

Kye frowned. “I was taught energy can neither be created nor destroyed.”

“Oh, that's still true here. It’s just that the magical energy is absorbed from radiation in a highly efficient process known as-”

Twilight's words were drowned out by a loud scream. Kye and his three pony companions looked towards the source of the noise. The creme coloured pony he had seen talking to Lyra earlier was standing in the door frame of a modest looking house.

She had a pink and purple mane and tail that curled slightly at the ends, and her cutie mark looked like three blue and yellow wrapped sweets. She was shaking slightly and staring at Kye as if he’d just murdered her children.

Lyra released his hand, set his bike down on its side stand, and let out a sigh.

“Bonnie-”

“You brought it here!?”

Lyra gasped. She looked furious. “He has a name, you know!”

Kye didn't know where to look. The Earth pony had every right to want to keep an alien out of her house and he couldn't think of anything to say to calm her down, so he just stood and kept his mouth shut, trying to ignore a particularly strong nicotine craving. He knew he’d have to stop smoking now he was stuck in a world that more than likely didn't have cigarettes. Still, it gave him a reason to quit the filthy habit.

Twilight shifted uncomfortably whilst Fluttershy simply glared at the pony. Kye half expected the trembling mare to freeze in paralysis, but she continued to argue with Lyra.

“No.”

“Bon Bon, you’re being ridiculous. Kye’s like us; he just looks a little dif-”

“I said, ‘No.’”

“You’re welcome to stay with me, if you’d like.”

All eyes turned to the yellow pegasus, who had spoken directly to Kye. He considered the offer for a moment. He supposed it would be a lot less awkward than trying to share houseroom with a pony who thought he was a monster. He was about to accept when something really fucking weird happened.

Lyra’s horn began to glow and she levitated around three feet in the air. Her eyes shone like a pair of headlights and illuminated the whole house whilst her mane and tail seemed to flow like Celestia’s for a moment. The glow of her horn intensified severely, briefly flooding the whole street with amber light. Then it was over.

She was panting slightly as she glanced around with a worried look. She then spoke as if nothing had happened. “Bon Bon, Princess Celestia personally asked me to keep an eye on him.”

The Earth pony looked at the unicorn and then at Kye, clearly shocked by the former's magical outburst.

“O-Okay,” she stuttered, stepping aside to allow them access. Kye was surprised at her sudden change of heart—he thought it would have taken a lot more than a light show to get her to reconsider.

He grabbed his keys from the ignition of his bike (not that he thought anypony was going to steal it—it was more out of habit) and followed a relieved looking Lyra through the low doorway and into a homely little sitting room. Twilight and Fluttershy followed behind him as Bon Bon ran through what looked like the doorway to a kitchen. She didn't return.

The ceiling was so low he had to bend over slightly, which was rather uncomfortable. He couldn't see any form of modern technology at all. However, there was a golden lyre sitting in the corner next to a potted plant. Kye had a pretty good idea who the peculiar instrument belonged to.

Lyra saw him looking at it and flashed him a smile, gesturing for him to sit on the rather large couch. His heart skipped a beat yet again as he sat down in the middle of it.

Why the fuck do I like her so much? She’s not even human! He had tried to ignore his little crush, but was finding it more and more difficult the more time he spent with her. It was her eyes that got him. Every time she flashed him that killer smile they seemed to twinkle at him. Sometimes she was so frickin’ adorable he had to stop himself from dropping to his knees and hugging her. He kept reminding himself that if he got too touchy-feely with her she’d probably drop him on his ass, not to mention out on the street.

Fluttershy lightly fluttered her wings whilst hopping up into the air, landing softly and turning to sit next to Kye. She smiled at him as Twilight settled herself into a comfortable looking armchair perpendicular to the couch. Lyra lifted a trapdoor with her magic and disappeared down a flight of stairs into what Kye assumed must be a basement.

Kye could see framed photographs of Lyra and Bon Bon on a mantelpiece above a large stone fireplace. A thick black rug covered the polished wood floor in front of the hearth, the matching curtains hung on either side of a large traditional bay window. A wooden staircase rose up behind the couch and a small coffee table sat in front of it. The walls were painted a light creme similar to Bon Bon’s coat, making Kye cringe a little.

Fluttershy seemed to sense his discomfort and put a reassuring hoof on his shoulder just as Lyra emerged from the basement. The unicorn was levitating a large ringed wooden barrel and five tankards with hinged lids. She briefly shot Fluttershy the same odd look she had in the swamp, and Kye felt the pegasus flinch a little, hastily removing her hoof. He was clueless as to what the unusual exchange had been and thought nothing of it as Lyra sat down on the other side of him.

Her sudden proximity set his heart thundering in his chest. Her scent was intoxicating—it reminded him of freshly cut grass on a summers day, blended with a seductive aroma that set his olfactory sense aflame. Her mane lightly brushed his shoulder as he tried to control his breathing. Luckily, the unicorn hadn't noticed his plight as she set the barrel and tankards on the coffee table.

No female had ever had this kind of effect on him. Not even his past girlfriends—few as they were—had been able to truly captivate his attention with such ease as Lyra was currently demonstrating. She wasn't even trying to, either. Kye shuddered at the thought of her actually making an effort to seduce him. He knew it would never happen though, what with him being the weirdo alien that washed up in the swamp.

“Bon Bon, come have a drink with us,” Lyra called to her roommate, who was still hiding in the kitchen.

“Just give me a minute.”

Kye was relieved to hear the Earth pony had calmed down somewhat, her voice no longer shaking with panic.

Lyra casually flicked a tap on the barrel with her hoof whilst skillfully levitating one of the tankards beneath it just in time to catch the amber liquid. She filled all five, leaving two on the table and floating the other three to Twilight, Fluttershy and himself. Kye noticed the shimmering aura around Twilight’s beverage change from from amber to purple as the lavender unicorn’s horn started to glow. Fluttershy grabbed her tankard with a hoof and took a sip.

How the fuck…?

Kye’s brain kept telling him that what he was seeing shouldn't have been physically possible. He stared at the pegasus and tried to figure it out.

“You gonna get this, or am I gonna have to have float it in front of your face all night?”

Twilight had been taking a sip of her drink and choked on a laugh at Lyra’s words, dribbling slightly as she continued to chuckle. Kye looked at the smiling turquoise unicorn sitting next to him, his face burning as he sheepishly reached out a hand to accept the still floating tankard.

“Thanks.”

Smooth as fuck as usual, Kye. He was making himself look like an utter asshat in front of her. Whenever he’d met a pretty girl back on Earth he’d been nervous at first, but he’d always managed to get his shit together after the awkward introductions. This, however, was beyond a fucking joke. He lifted the lid of the tankard and took a sip to distract himself.

Woah, holy fuck! The cider tasted amazing. He took several large gulps, the amber nectar felt like it had a magical quality to it as it quickly washed away his embarrassment.

Lyra raised her eyebrows slightly, still smiling at him and saying nothing. Fluttershy had a slightly worried look on her face, and Twilight glanced at Lyra as if she was expecting the latter to say something. She didn't.

Kye failed to stop himself from belching rather loudly before shamelessly bursting out laughing. He tried to excuse himself, but all he managed was a string of incoherent nonsense.

Bon Bon appeared in the kitchen doorway, probably to see what all the fuss was about, just as Kye finally regained control. Lyra levitated one of the remaining tankards to her roommate, who caught it with a hoof. She glanced at Kye for a moment, before somehow managing to walk on three legs to another armchair in the bay window opposite Twilight.

She was still looking a little uneasy, but Kye much preferred her giving him dodgy looks as opposed to screaming in terror. Lyra took a sip of her own tankard, whilst Kye drained the rest of his. She watched him set the empty tankard on the coffee table then finally spoke.

“You’re gonna be wasted soon, you know that, right?”

She gave him a slightly evil smile as she poured him another drink.

Lyra was furious with herself. She’d dragged Kye away from the crowd of onlookers, Twilight keeping him occupied while she’d been lost in thought trying to figure out how to convince Bon Bon to let him stay with them. Predictably, her roommate had refused. Then Fluttershy had offered to take him in, at which point Lyra had completely lost it.

She’d surged like a school filly, right in front of Princess Celestia’s right-hoof pony, no doubt. Twilight hadn't said anything, but Lyra knew her little outburst would probably end up in the lavender unicorn’s next letter to the goddess. She could have easily killed somepony (or some human, she thought with a shiver) if she hadn't managed to quickly control and diminish the highly embarrassing little episode. It was one of the drawbacks of being so powerful.

They were now halfway through the barrel of cider and Lyra was pleased to notice that Bon Bon was no longer scared of their human guest. She had come in and sat down with them and was now calmly looking at Kye with curiosity instead of fear.

Lyra should have warned him that Apple family cider was deceptively strong. The only pony aside from Applejack who could down a few tankards of the amber nectar and still trot in a straight line was Rainbow Dash.

She started to feel a little guilty when his speech began to slur.

“See...Back wurr’ ahh come from, we got hurrses...but they arn’ much gud’ for covershin’ with. They jus’ eat hay n’ stuff,” he burped loudly, “and they arn’ nearly as preddy.”

He looked at her for a second before seeming to realise what he’d said. Paling slightly, he took another gulp of cider and quickly turned to Twilight.

“So Twi...any chunce ov’ gettn’ some go juws?

“Erm...I…um…”

She looked at Lyra, obviously not having understood a word the human said.

“I think he means fuel for his motorcycle.” She told the confused unicorn.

“Yesh, petrol!” He extended an arm in her direction, a couple of fingers lightly brushing her ear.

Her eyes went wide and her whole body tensed up. Her tail gave a solitary twitch, quietly whipping against the couch behind her. Twilight and Fluttershy stared at her in shock as Bon Bon let out a loud gasp and covered her mouth with a hoof. Kye seemed to notice something was wrong and looked rather confused.

“Sumthin’ ah shed’?”

Lyra ignored the question. He’d basically just felt her up. She wouldn't have minded if they’d been alone, but now she had three ponies expecting her to give him a good telling off for his wandering hooves, or hands, whatever. She seriously doubted he had any idea he’d just touched her in a highly inappropriate manner—a pony’s ears were quite sensitive. He probably thought it was a friendly gesture—that, or he’d done it accidentally.

She looked at him, but he didn't seem to be focusing on her at all. His head slowly drooped, and his body quickly followed as he began to fall forwards. She was about to catch him in a levitation field but Fluttershy beat her to it, wrapping her wings and forelegs around the now snoring human and gently easing him back onto the couch.

“Did he just fondle your ears?” whispered Twilight, even though Kye was now out for the count.

“I’m pretty sure it was an accident.” Lyra informed the unicorn.

“You looked like you enjoyed it,” Bon Bon shot at Lyra. Her roommate had a rather annoying habit of being able to read her better than anypony else. Really Bon Bon!? Lyra glared at the Earth pony. She knew Kye was completely out of it, but she still didn't want to take any chances of him finding out a “horse” had the hots for him.

Twilight cleared her throat. “I should go, its getting late, and Spike will be wondering where I am. Thank you all for a wonderful evening.”

She trotted to the door and opened it with her magic, stepping out into the cool night air before closing it behind her. Fluttershy still had Kye wrapped up in her wings—he was drooling on her feathers a little but she didn't seem to mind.

The pretty pegasus had showed more interest in the human in the past few hours than she had any stallion her whole life. Lyra had to wonder which of them he’d prefer as an alpha mare if he was into ponies.

“I’m off to bed.”

Bon Bon set her tankard on the table as she spoke, throwing the unconscious human one last look before getting up and climbing the stairs. The two remaining ponies looked at each other, Fluttershy clutching Kye like a comfort blanket. She seemed a little unwilling to let go of him and Lyra had to raise her eyebrows at the pegasus before she eventually laid him down on the couch.

“I should go too.”

She looked at Lyra as though she was going to add something for a second, but instead promptly trotted to the door, quickly opening it and taking off into the night sky.

Lyra sighed. She hadn't meant to be so rude to her friend. She closed the door with her magic and retrieved a spare blanket from the closet. She draped it over Kye, gently tucking him in with her hooves before quietly ascending the stairs herself.

Kye woke up to the sound of his ridiculously annoying alarm clock. He fucking hated the thing, because it meant he had to get up and go face another miserable day full of traffic, parcels, missed deadlines and asshole supervisors.

He slammed a fist on the big snooze button and forced himself to haul his lazy ass out of bed, stumbling out of his room and along the hall. He rubbed his eyes as he entered the bathroom. The sight that greeted him in the mirror wasn't a pretty one; he always looked a mess in the morning. Pulling himself together slightly he quickly showered, brushed his teeth and got ready for work.

Twenty minutes later he was sitting in the usual A1 morning jam, made even worse by the never-ending road works. Seriously, these fuckwits just loved closing lanes for no reason other than to severely piss everyone off. They were like wombles—you knew they were there but you never fucking seen them actually doing any work.

His left knee felt like it was going to dislocate from constantly fighting the clutch as he finally cleared the stop-start traffic. He pulled the delivery van off the motorway and onto a dual carriageway, enjoying a small portion of somewhat peaceful driving before hitting a set of traffic lights.

A black Kawasaki streetfighter with an alien style headlight pulled up beside him, immediately catching his attention. Hmm, ZRX1100, old school, Kye thought as he looked at the machine. It had rusted slightly in places and had scratches on the paint work, but it looked like it truly belonged on the open road. It certainly wasn't the shiny weekend toy of a forty-something tyre-kicker. No, this bike was a workhorse, and its owner a proper biker. Kye respected that.

The rider slowly turned to look at him for a few moments, a knowing look in his eye. Kye felt an odd sense of kinship as the biker gave him a solitary nod. The lights changed and the motorcycle shot off into the mist, blue flames momentarily flashing from the exhaust.

Wait—mist? Kye suddenly noticed a thick fog he could have sworn wasn't there ten seconds ago. He pushed it from his mind, flicking the fog lights on and turning the radio up.

He listened to the headlines as he drove. It was always some variant of the same depressing bullshit everyday; children going missing, young girls getting raped, the government economically screwing the whole country.

Kye hated the Tories with a passion. The prime minister was a pompous prick, constantly carving up public sector industries and selling them off for next to fuck all to his corporate mates. Tosser.

When Kye finally got to work he had cheered up somewhat, only to be sent crashing right back down again when his short, grossly overweight supervisor waddled up to him and began yelling in his face about an order from the previous day.

Most of the night shift still hadn't left—some of them had looks of glee on their faces as they hung back to watch the fat lump of a man demonstrate his Napoleon complex. Kye just stood there, not really listening. He wished he was somewhere else, but in that moment he couldn't escape the hell that was his life.

“...and this better not happen again or I’ll be reporting you to head office!” the repulsive man finished with an odd flourish, flecks of spit flying from his mouth before he waddled off to shout at someone else.

Kye pulled out a handkerchief and gingerly wiped down his uniform, wishing the most painful of deaths on the horrible fat bastard who was now screaming at a young lad fresh out of school for accidentally knocking a stack of boxes off a pallet truck.

“Super extra angry Grimshaw today, huh?” Steve, one of Kye’s few friends in this wretched place chuckled as he rolled up in a forklift truck.

“I hope he chokes on his mid-morning microwave meal.” Kye replied, still glaring at Grimshaw. The fat folds of his back were jiggling slightly as he continued to shout.

The stock pickers had already assembled Kye’s first order of the day, and the loaders had just about finished packing the back of his van. He grabbed the timetable from the now empty pallet and had a quick look. There were multiple drop offs in Shiney Row, Washington, Birtley, Gateshead, Jarrow and Tynemouth. The run would take him all morning and probably cut into his lunch hour. Fuck. My. Life.

Kye set off into the fog. It was getting worse. He could barely see ten feet in front of his headlights as he crawled along the road. He persevered and managed to make the first ten or so drops without a hitch.

As he pulled onto the slip road of the Washington highway, he noticed something odd: none of the traffic had their lights on at all. He indicated, checking a wing mirror then moved to the inside lane. An articulated lorry suddenly emerged from the thick fog and barely missed him as it swerved, giving a loud blast from its horn.

What the fuck? The traffic was flying past him as if it were the clearest of sunny days. Several cars, a couple more lorries, and an SUV pulling a caravan overtook him as he tried to figure out how the fuck they could see where they were going. It was like driving through a thundercloud.

Kye eventually made it off the dual carriageway and was crawling through Jarrow looking for his next drop location. Despite the fog, he quickly found it and turned into the back street.

He’d pulled up behind a tanning salon and was busy unloading cosmetic supplies when he heard a loud tyre screech and the rumble of an in-line-four.

On emerging from the salon’s courtyard, he was just in time to see the bike skid to a halt in front of him. The same bike, in fact, that he’d seen at the lights on his way to work. The rider stared at him.

“Err...can I help you?”

Kye was starting to get a little worried when the rider gave no reaction other than to rev his growling engine rather loudly. He then released the throttle, the bike returning to idle as his right arm very slowly raised to point into the back of the delivery van.

Kye looked in the indicated direction and saw a midnight blue alicorn standing amongst the various parcels, staring back at him.

“You no longer belong to this world Kye.”

Her voice held more power than a thousand little boy bombs, yet she had barely raised it above a whisper. Her eyes shone bright like headlights as Kye tried to figure out how the fuck he knew what an alicorn was.

“You have to let go of the past.”

She gave a solitary stomp of her front right hoof and the van, the salon, the motorcycle and its rider, everything was suddenly distorted as if it were being stretched beyond the event horizon of a black hole. The ground beneath his feet shattered along glowing fissures and was washed away by the tide of disintegrated matter that used to be his surroundings. Nothing escaped the catastrophic entropy the alicorn had so casually called forth. Within a few seconds all that remained was a dark abyss. Even gravity ceased to exist, causing Kye to float beside the alicorn and wonder what the fuck had just happened.

After a few moments, he felt something soft and springy under his feet. He looked down and noticed he was standing on a fluffy white cloud; the alicorn gracefully touched down beside him and shot a projectile of pure energy from her horn into the dark void overhead. It ascended with the speed of a bullet, then exploded with the force of a supernova, spawning the most beautiful nebulas Kye had ever laid eyes on.

A full spectrum greeted his eyes, the vibrant colours soothing his tortured soul as the sudden recollection of another spectrum occurred to him—the spectrum of the mane and tail of a pegasus.

The realisation hit him, and everything came flooding back: the race, the crash, the swamp and…

“Lyra!”

He felt a surge of joy as he remembered the beautiful unicorn that had captured his heart; then he remembered he was standing on a cloud in the middle of space. He looked at the alicorn. She was rather pretty, wearing a black crown and yoke, the latter adorned with a half moon which matched her cutie mark. Her mane and tail were the same colour as her midnight blue coat, magically flowing and twinkling like the night sky. Her dark blue eyes were no longer shining. She was giving him the same wry smile as…

“You’re her sister…” Kye trailed off.

“Princess Luna,” the alicorn replied, still smiling at him.

Kye suddenly remembered he’d blurted out Lyra’s name like a lovesick idiot and tried not to blush as he looked up at the cosmos again. He attempted to divert her attention away from his little outburst by asking a question.

“Where are we?”

She lay down on the cloud, folded her wings and gestured for him to sit. Kye settled himself next to her, crossing his legs. She was slightly smaller than her sister and a little less intimidating, making her more approachable.

“Nowhere,” she simply replied.

Kye still didn't understand. Now that he thought about it, the situation he found himself in didn't make sense. He shouldn't have been able to breathe for one thing, yet he could feel the air rushing in and out of his lungs. Clouds weren't supposed to be solid either, yet he was sitting quite comfortably next to the alicorn. The only other possible explanation was that this was a dream, but...it couldn't be. He was lucid, everything felt so...real.

“What happened to me?” he asked Luna.

The alicorn contemplated the stars as she answered.

“I believe your subconscious was unwilling to accept your transition to Equestria, instead choosing to maintain an illusion of familiarity resembling the life you can no longer return to. If I wasn't able to hack into your mind and convince the lone rider to lead me to you, then you would have probably been lost to a permanent state of limbo.”

Her words well and truly freaked him out. He remembered how completely convinced he’d been that he was just experiencing another day doing his shitty job. He then thought of the Kawasaki streetfighter. The weird fog made sense.

“The lone rider?”

She turned to Kye. “The part of you that yearns for something more than a life of misery; the part of you that doesn't want to be alone anymore,” she replied with a knowing smile.

Kye thought about his past life, how it felt like he was always waiting for something that would never come. She was right—he’d never been happy.

“So the fog…” he trailed off again.

“An attempt to make you easier to locate—your subconscious was making quite an effort to hide you.”

Kye frowned. “How would fog make me easier to find?”

She turned to contemplate the stars once more. “Dreams often don’t make much sense Kye.”

A thought occurred to him as he too gazed at the beautiful sight around them. “I’m still dreaming now, aren't I?”

She smiled again. “I am the princess of the night. It is my duty to enter the dreams of my subjects and help them with the troubles they face. My sister informed me of your unsettling transition and suggested I keep an eye on you. I believe she may have just saved your life.”

Kye made a mental note to thank the sun goddess the next opportunity he got—she had helped him so much since his arrival to the strange new world. He then looked to the goddess sitting beside him.

“Thank you, Luna. I appreciate you dragging me out of that hellhole.”

Kye thought of how he could have murdered his sweaty fat fuck of a supervisor with a forklift truck if he knew he’d been dreaming. He chuckled. Knowing he’d never have to endure another spit shower was more than enough to make up for the missed opportunity.

“Don't thank me yet; you still have to wake up.”

“What?” Kye said, pulled from his musings.

The alicorn got to her hooves and her eyes began to shine again, the cosmos suddenly dimming.

“Time for you to experience an Apple family hangover.” Kye saw her smile before she faded from his vision completely. “You’ll wish you were still stuck in that rolling metal prison.”

The last of his lucidity vanished and he knew no more.

Author's Notes:

Liking these horse words? Maybe this group will interest you:

R I D E R V E R S E