I was stunned when I realized I was alive. I woke up, my face smashed into the front seat in the Humvee; the only difference (Besides superficial damage and the vehicle being totaled) was it was upside down. I looked up in relief to see that the seatbelt I put on right before impact was still there. I pressed down in the center and it came undone. I slumped to the bottom (Which was now the top) of the car, and laid there for a couple moments. Part of me wanted to take a nap and hope someone else would do all the work, but I soon realized this was no time to be lazy.

I didn’t check if my friends were okay right off the bat, but instead made a run for the door. We were in the middle of a desert, it was dawn and in the far background I could see the skyscrapers of what was Stalliongrad. It gave me a strange qualm of nostalgia, the largest skyscraper reminded me of the Lucky 38 Casino, funny how you can remember think of the most random things at the most random occasions.

I then pulled my head out of my ass and got to the task at hand. I went back into the Humvee to check for any clues of serious damage. There was blood, but most of it was in different locations, I assumed it meant everyone was hurt but not seriously. I looked down at myself, my nose had been bleeding apparently and I had cuts and bruises, but other than that I was okay.

I heard one of the doors fall off, I looked to see that the driver seat was now vacant, Tyler must be awake. I ran around the hood and saw Tyler steadying himself against the Humvee. He had the same superficial damages as me, minus the nose bleed, instead he had a small gash above his eye.

“You okay?” I asked. Tyler turned towards me and gave a quick nod, I was relieved to see he was still conscious.

Another door fell off; I saw 2 ponies get out of the Humvee.

“How’d we get all the way out here?” Nico asked

“No clue” Mike said, both of my friends seemed to be in the same condition. The only problem here was confusion.

Dan was the last one to come to. Maybe a minute or two after Mike and Nico exited the vehicle Dan opened the door (Without breaking it) and stepped out. We were already trying to make a fire though.

“Where are we?” Dan asked; Dan seemed to be the worst off of us; nonetheless there was good news, better news and bad news. Good news was he didn’t go flying through the window (Dan doesn’t “do” seatbelts), better news was he didn’t go flying when the Humvee flipped over, bad news was he had small shards of glass in his face.  

“Outside of Stalliongrad” Nico said, Nico returned to his work on the fire. We had found several twigs lying around (Strangely considering we were in the middle of a desert) and Nico had found a large rock suitable for a flint. After striking it against another rock a couple times a spark occurred, falling from the air and into the cluster of small twigs. In no time we had a small fire. We all laid down on the surprisingly flat piece of sand maybe 50 feet from the Humvee and relaxed for the moment.

You’d think a desert would be hot all day long, right? Wrong.  The desert was like a brisk winter night. I soon realized that without clouds or trees or any suitable cover there was nothing stopping heat from coming down on the ground, and nothing keeping it there. God bless scientific research! I never really liked my teacher very much, usually because how he pronounced his Rs but he knew how to make something stick in your mind! I still remember that sermon word from word

“Now when you are in a forrrrrrrest there are a lot of trrrrrrrrrrrrrrreees , these trrrrrrrrrrrres block sunlight from hitting the grrrrrrrrrrrround, but at night those trrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrees also prrrrrrrrrrrrrevent sunlight from leaving the forrrrrrrrrrrrrrest. Now in a deserrrrrrrrrrrt there are no trrrrrrrrrrrrrrres like therrrrrrrrrrrrrrre is in a forrrrrrrrrrrest, in a forrrrrrrrrrrrrrest those trrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrees prrrrrrrrrrrrevent sunlight from leaving. So a night in the deserrrrrrrrrrrrt is coolerrrrrrr than a night in the forrrrrrrrrrrest, Tylerrrrrrrrrrrr arrrrrrrrrrrrrre you using your phone? Tylerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr put your phone away rrrrrrrrrrrrrright now. Tylerrrrrrrrrrrrrr that is it, go to the in school suspension rrrrrrrrrroom rrrrrrrrrrright now orrrrrrrrrrr I will get the vice prrrrrrrrrrincipal or the prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrincipal in herrrrrrrrrrrre rrrrrrrrrrrrright away.”

After 5 more minutes the fire was roaring and we had time to talk about our game plan.

“We should start off tonight” Dan said “We don’t have any food and we don’t know how close we are to civilization.”

“Dan, just stop talking” Tyler said, using comedy as a deadly tool of negotiation “it is like 15 degrees out here, we should rest up and start off tomorrow.”

I had to agree with Tyler. We were all stressed (Mainly being sucked into a horse’s realm and being launched like a cannon ball) and tired, we should all try and get what little rest we could in the few hours of darkness remaining and continue on tomorrow. I just realized, if Stalliongrad is like Stalingrad, and Stalingrad is in Russia, who’s idea was it to name a city Stalliongrad in the middle of a fucking desert? How did they even know about Stalin? How do ponies know English? Why are they colorful? WHY CAN THEY TALK? The questions poured into my mind, impairing my power to think, none of this made sense. Due to the excitement and events of these first few days we hadn’t even had a serious discussion about any of this; perhaps this is the perfect time.

“Hey guys we need to talk” I said “So, what do you think about this current situation? Like what is with all of this?”

“Yea, isn’t Stalliongrad like in Japan or something?” Tyler asked

“Russia stupid” Mike butted in

“True, but how do they speak English? How can they even talk?” Nico asked

“I don’t know” I said “But more important, what do we do when we get out of this desert?”

“We got to head to that Statue of Friendship that Sam was talking about” Mike said

“True” I said, I had forgotten about that

“Hey I have a question, if ponies can use magic, what do you think they use magic for?” Mike asked, feeling his horn

“I’m not sure, but considering we just left a huge skyscraper city I don’t know.” Dan said

“What do you think is up with the Russian guy?” I asked “Why did he help us instead of the other one?”

“I know, and how did he even know we were here?” Tyler asked

“I don’t know” I said, everything seemed to have a “I don’t know” answer. I felt like a small piece of garbage floating in an ocean. No matter what I try, there is no way to fully understand what is going on without some help.

“Let’s just try and get some sleep” Nico suggested

“Okay, sorry for the ‘Stupid ass questions 101’” I joked, I knew that all this was doing was stressing us all out. After what we’ve been through there is no real need to let the worry rat run amuck in our brains. So I chose to change the subject.

“So how’d you guys end up finding Harrison? What happened to Conor” I asked

“We were going to be evacuated on a big balloon with Conor, but we couldn’t just leave you in there, we hoped he’d drop off at Canterlot hospital”

“Wait you just left him there?” I asked

“Kind of” Dan  said “Then we just walked around the city, heard a crash and found you guys.”

Tyler said “How did your day go anyways?”

“Meh” Mike said

“Well Mike and I went to a recording studio place so Mike could get a contract” I said

“How’d that go?” Dan asked

“Well, they loved it, then we found a gig in a Gryphon place, then we started a riot…” Mike said

“That was you?” Nico asked with a stunned face

“Eeyup” Mike said

“Well we learned a little about Stalliongrad. It is a walled city, the walls are used to stop the occasional attack of violent monsters that are called “beavers”, The weakest section of the wall is on the Gryphon side of the wall…” Dan said, he then said in a more solemn tone “Perhaps a Gryphon blew the wall up?”

“Silly Dan! Black people can’t use explosives!” Nico said, we all turned to him. What the fuck was that Nico?

“Nico that is so racist!” Mike said “Why are they even black people anyways!?”

“Sorry, sorry, sorry” Nico said, looking embarrassed and downright humiliated

After that the serious discussion died fast, we ended up getting bored of talking about various conspiracy theories about the Russian and decided to play  a good old fashion game of I spy.

“I spy something tan!” Tyler always said

“Is it sand…?” Dan asked, not even asking but stating in a morose tone

“IT IS” Tyler would always say in astonishment, I ended up drifting to sleep overhearing my friends’ ramblings.

I couldn’t help but shake the feeling of the man, what was he doing there? It made no sense.

Next Chapter: I Can haz Wagon Estimated time remaining: 3 Hours, 2 Minutes