//HEY. HEY, ARE YOU THERE? YES? WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULD WORK ON FINDING A FUCKING WAY OUT OF THIS FANTASTIC SITUATION YOU'VE MANAGED TO PUT YOUR RANK ASS IN INSTEAD OF RESPONDING TO ME! AND WHAT WAS THAT FESTERING EXCREMENT ABOUT JUMPING FROM NOWHERE PRETENDING YOU'RE A HERO INSTEAD OF THE WORLD'S NASTIEST STAIN? I'LL TRY TO UNDERSTAND YOUR SELF-SERVING AND COWARDLY IDEA THAT HEROISM AND INTELLIGENCE ARE DIRECTLY OPPOSED, FIRSTLY BECAUSE IN YOUR CASE THEY ARE, AND SECONDLY BECAUSE WE BOTH KNOW DEEP DOWN YOU REALLY JUST WANT TO BE RIDDEN AND CROTCH-PULVERIZED BY WHATEVER FAIRY FLOWER PONY IS IN FRONT OF YOU AT THE MOMENT BECAUSE YOU ARE PATHETIC AND WEAK, BUT CAN YOU AT LEAST FUCKING ACT COMPETENT? SOMETIME, MAYBE?
//Uurgh, my head. I can't tell what's making it hurt worse: the double Stupefy spell, the dragon instinct, or the constant movement.
//I crack open one eye. In front of me, a drakeling with dull gold scales is bound to a stake by layers of rope around his torso and two coils around his feet, arms behind his back. The stake is carried on the backs of two ponies with green bandanas over their manes, exactly like the rest of the ponies surrounding us in the ceremony chamber except a few mares in armor and one in green robes. I am in the same predicament as my kin, trapped.
Kin Trapped: Hey! Hey, are you awake?
Mare in Armor: No talking!
KT: Or what, you'll kill me?
//Before us, on a raised stage accessed by wide stone stairs, is a tall statue of a creature I can only assume is a snake demon. The drakeling and I are placed on the front of the stage, stakes at our backs planted into holes carved into the rock.
MA: I don't have to. Keep your mouth up and you'll find punishment in the Greater World.
Cult Announcer: Step away! Let the offerings be gazed upon by her Lordship!
//The mares retreat away from us down the steps, staring us down.
KT: When I imagined my own funeral, I never thought its cause would be 'offered up by cultists to a freaky snake thing'.
Spike: Ah, my head...
KT: You're awake? Good, just in time for your dismemberment.
Spike: Do you know what they're planning to do?
KT: Kill us.
Spike: Really, I had no idea.
CA: As it was when Alipheese created our world, flesh must be given, in order to repay the debts we have incurred, and right the wrongs we have--
KT: (You're listening to this? I could never pay attention in Sunday school.)
Spike: (They taught you about a monstrous snake demon in Sunday school?)
KT: (No, Celestia. Same thing, really.)
Spike: (Celestia is not a colossal snake demon.)
KT: (Neither of them are going to have any effect on the near future. To the disappointment of pretty much everyone.)
Spike: (Trust me, it'll only be through the power of Celestia we're getting out of here.)
KT: (That will be quite a trick.)
//I look around. My kinsman and I are bound to stakes in front of an audience of maybe a dozen cultsmares, including two armored mares, and the announcer, who I think is the Royal Mistress. To our back is the statue and the cavern wall; far out in front is Saccr-Ulkip, observing from an isolated entrance to the chamber. I test the restraints covertly.
Spike: (Hmm, I think they gave me too much room because of the cast. I can slip my foot out here.)
KT: (Cast?)
//Wide-eyed, the drakeling sneaks a look at the gauze and slat on my foot. He makes a little sound as if choking while I motion him to look away.
KT: (The date! That's my rebirth-mate's writing!)
//Wouldn't it have been easier to say 'wife'?
Spike: (Yes, she did the dressing.)
KT: (You've seen her? Where?! Tell me!)
Spike: (Celel Dracos, right? She was on the road being attacked by cultists; I managed to fight them off but Mr. Mortani and his guards were already dead.)
KT: (Was she hurt? What happened to her?!)
Spike: (If you'd let me get to it! She was fine so I told her to keep going towards Forlegsandria, and I came here to rescue you!)
KT: (You're doing a damn fine job of it.)
Spike: (We're not finished yet!)
CA: --and as Alipheese has caused our cups to overflow with the beauty of life and the richness of our world, the duty is ours to offer back in kind to fill up her goblet--
Spike: (You need to be a part in your own rescue. Can you fight?)
KT: (Not really. I'm a doctor. Was part of the Dragon Scouts as a hatchling, though, so if you have a bow and arrow on you somewhere...)
Spike: (I'd be more interested in working with rope.)
KT: (Yeah, me too.)
Spike: (Can you breathe fire?)
KT: (No, sorry.)
Spike: (What do you mean, 'no'?!)
KT: (I can't breathe fire. I have none of it left right now. They took it all, stole it out from my waist.)
Spike: (...What? That's how that works?)
//The doctor looks at me oddly.
KT: (Are you a free drakeling? Not bound to anyone?)
Spike: (Thought committed relationships would put a damper on the whole Hero thing.)
KT: (...I'm sorry you have to die this way.)
Spike: (I'm not dying today.)
//I breathe a little bit of fire on the back of the drakeling's ropes, disguising it as a sneeze.
KT: Aaah!
//The entire room, previously paying attention to the Speaker about to wrap up her speech, swivels their heads to look at us.
//I raise my eyebrows, urging him to say something more.
KT: He sneezed all over me! Disgusting! Aaugh! Can I get a towel up here?
//The room swivels back to the Speaker.
KT: (No respect for hygiene...)
Spike: (What I need you to do--)
KT: (Why did you do that?! How do you know I'm not just going to burn at the stake like a witch here?!)
Spike: ('Oh no! I might die twenty seconds earlier than I normally would!'?)
KT: (Well, you don't have to be pissy about it.)
Spike: (...Sorry. What I need you to do is -- can you move your hands?)
KT: (Hhhrrk... barely.)
Spike: (Dig at the rope and try to get it to burn away. When you can break free, uh... do whatever you think would be best, I guess. Untying me would be much appreciated.)
KT: (Understood. But to warn you, I might also scream and run away from a towering snake demon if it's here.)
Spike: (Hey, it's okay. She's going to destroy the world anyway.)
CA: It is time, neonatescales, for us to enter our Lord's Greater World. Go, Goblet Keeper, and fill Her Chalice one final time with her drink, the seed of life and fire.
//A mare in a green kilt advances up the steps, green bandana around her neck like a bib.
Spike: What? Is it starting?
KT: Er... kind of, it depends what you mean.
//The Goblet Keeper stops at the top of the steps and looks back and forth between us, smiling with a great amount of teeth and little humor.
KT: You already spent two hours taking the skin off the fucking thing and now you want more? Leave me the hell alone!
//The Goblet Keeper glares at him, smile rapidly fading.
KT: Are you all personally inclined to jump on anything cylindrical that spits venom, or do you just worship an obviously fictional demon because she lets you abuse people however you want without feeling guilty? Answer me!
Spike: (What are you doing?)
KT: (I'm going to die anyway.)
CA: Goblet Keeper...
//The Keeper stands tall, ready to perform her duty.
CA: Silence him.

[[SAVE LOCATION]]

The Goblet Keeper grabs The Drakeling (???) by the left upper leg with her right front hoof! The Goblet Keeper grabs The Drakeling (???) by the right upper leg with her left front hoof!
The Goblet Keeper nuzzles The Drakeling (???) in the lower body with her fuzzy snout!

Spike: Celestia's wings!
KT: Get off me, you freak!
Spike: (Try to give the flames as much time as possible.)
KT: (I'm working on it.)

The Goblet Keeper grabs The Drakeling (???) by the waist with her mouth!

KT: Gaauh!
Spike: Talking, keep talking to me. What's your name?
KT: Kezno. My name is Kezno Telekom.
Spike: 'Telekom'? As in, 'telecommunications' Telekom?
KT: It's a newer name.
Spike: Must be; you don't meet many people nowadays who can say 'hi, my name means: phone line'. You said you were a doctor?
KT: As much as you can call it that; right now I think I'm lunch.

The Goblet Keeper assaults The Drakeling (Kezno) with her mouth! The Drakeling (Kezno)'s resistance is lowered!

KT: Hooph, stop...
Spike: Don't focus on that! Where are you from, Kezno? Where's Celel from?
KT: Celel... I'm so sorry...
Spike: Talking! Keep talking!
KT: We're both from the Aquinatic Mountains. Mr. Mortani was a trader who said he'd be willing to take us to Forlegsandria, so we saved up everything we had to go.
Spike: The Aquinatic Mountains? I heard it wasn't safe for a dragon there.
KT: You have no idea.

The Goblet Keeper assaults The Drakeling (Kezno) with her tongue! The Drakeling (Kezno)'s resistance is lowered further!

//Kezno jerks his knees from side to side, trying to escape, but the Goblet Keeper's skill is unmatchable.

KT: Kya! As if I wasn't sore enough, you bite me!
//The Goblet Keeper says something in response, but her voice is muffled because her head is buried in Kezno's lower body.
KT: 'Swings, when he said keep talking, he didn't mean you...
//The Goblet Keeper starts to hum, obviously enjoying herself.

Spike: You said you're from the Aquinatics, right? Do you know a dragon named Quine?
KT: Quine? Everyone knows Quine!
Spike: (Oh, cool!)
KT: Quine is the reason ponies and dragons can't settle down and live peacefully together! He's wanted for razing at least a dozen villages by the Equestrian Cavalry!
//Really? Wow. I'm sure he has a good reason for it, but still...
Spike: Is the Equestrian Cavalry ponies riding on something or just an army?
KT: Whatever they are, they hate dragons.

The Goblet Keeper assaults The Drakeling (Kezno) with her mouth! The Drakeling (Kezno)'s resistance is at a minimum!

KT: (The humming, stop humming, Celestia...)
Spike: (Is that some sort of technique?)
KT: (No! It just makes it weird!)
Spike: (What's the progress on the rope? How far are you?)
KT: (I think I'm making some; I can't really tell.)
Spike: When the cultists ambushed you, was it an ambush? Was there anyone who could have known where you were going, and when?
KT: It wasn't an ambush, and no. We went around the Valley of Death, and besides, the six of them were just laying about on the bridge; we noticed them long before they -- aah, aaaagh!

The Drakeling (Kezno) struggles in vain against the grip of The Goblet Keeper's right front hoof on his left upper leg! The Drakeling (Kezno) struggles in vain against the grip of The Goblet Keeper's left front hoof on his right upper leg!
The Drakeling (Kezno) bucks back and forth, trying to escape the grip of The Goblet Keeper's head on his lower body, but is unable!

The Goblet Keeper assaults The Drakeling (Kezno) with her tongue! The Drakeling (Kezno)'s resistance is finished!

The Drakeling (Kezno) is defeated!
//Kezno shudders and curls inwards.
//The Goblet Keeper buries her head into Kezno's waist, greedily taking everything Kezno has.
KT: Celel... forgive me...
//Seconds pass as Kezno twitches in his binds, forcing back tears, Goblet Keeper still at his waist.

The Goblet Keeper releases the grip of The Goblet Keeper's right front hoof on The Drakeling (Kezno)'s left upper leg. The Goblet Keeper releases the grip of The Goblet Keeper's left front hoof on The Drakeling (Kezno)'s right upper leg. The Goblet Keeper releases the grip of The Goblet Keeper's mouth on The Drakeling (Kezno)'s waist.

CA: Has this one been made docile?

The Goblet Keeper stands up.

//The Goblet Keeper smiles, again with only teeth.
//Why is it the smiles of all my enemies could cause monstrous jesters to cry and run scared?
CA: The Goblet is only half full.
//The Goblet Keeper advances in front of me, eyes full of lust and hate.
CA: Make it overflow.

[[SAVE LOCATION]]

KT: Hero. What was your name, Hero?
Spike: _Is_, Kezno; my name is Spike.
KT: (Spike, give me as much time as you can.)
Spike: (I'll try.)

The Goblet Keeper grabs The Drakeling (Spike) by the left upper leg with her right front hoof! The Goblet Keeper grabs The Drakeling (Spike) by the right upper leg with her left front hoof!
The Goblet Keeper nuzzles The Drakeling (Spike) in the waist with her fuzzy snout!

KT: It was an honor knowing you, Spike.

//Celestia is this horrible, please, don't let this happen to me...

The Goblet Keeper prepares to assault The Drakeling (Spike)! The Goblet Keeper...

Spike: ...
KT: ...
CA: ...

The Goblet Keeper releases the grip of The Goblet Keeper's right front hoof on The Drakeling (Spike)'s left upper leg. The Goblet Keeper releases the grip of The Goblet Keeper's left front hoof on The Drakeling (Spike)'s right upper leg.

Goblet Keeper: What is that smoke coming from the first sacrifice?

//WHELP, FUCK THIS

The Drakeling (Spike) kicks The Goblet Keeper in the head with his right knee, bruising the muscle and shattering the jaw!
Spike: Crazy cultist bint!
CA: His legs! Who failed to secure his legs?!
Spike: How far are you?!
KT: Not far!
Spike: Be further!!

The Drakeling (Spike) kicks The Goblet Keeper in the upper body with his right foot, bruising the muscle and shattering the left false ribs!
The Goblet Keeper is propelled away by the force of the blow!
The Goblet Keeper's lower body skids along the ground, bruising the muscle and tearing apart the middle spine's nervous tissue!
The Goblet Keeper falls off the stage and slams into the ground!
The Goblet Keeper's left front leg takes the full force of the impact, shattering the bone, jamming the bone through the left front knee's muscle and shattering the left front knee's bone!
The Goblet Keeper gives into pain!

//Breathlessly, bent over and clawing at the restraints, Kezno mutters:
KT: Huh, we might have a chance.

The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! The rope is caught in the dragonfire! The rope's fibers are cracked and burnt!

KT: Watch the flames!
Spike: Work faster!
CA: What?! Who forgot to drain the second sacrifice?! _Why can he breathe fire_?!
Spike: Stuff it, you--
KT: Uh, Spike, you might want to save your breath for other things.
//The rest of the cultists all snort and paw at the ground, lowering their heads.
Spike: Uh oh.
CA: Members! Make him docile!

The Cult Members attack!

The Cult Member (1) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!
The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! But The Cult Member (1) dodges away, off the stairs!

The Cult Member (4) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!

Spike: I can't hold them all off like this!
KT: You're going to have to try!

The Cult Member (6) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!
The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! The Cult Member (6) is caught in the dragonfire! Her right front leg has been burnt to a crisp!

The Mare in Armor (1) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!

The Cult Member (4) leaps forward, reaching the top of the stage!
The Drakeling (Spike) kicks The Cult Member (4) in the left front leg with his right foot, shattering the bone!
An artery has been opened by the attack, a ligament has been torn, and a motor nerve has been severed!
The Cult Member (4) falls off the stage!

The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! The Cult Member (6) is caught in the dragonfire! Her right back leg has been burnt to a crisp!
The Cult Member (6) collapses!

Spike: Come on with that binding, Kezno!
KT: Working on it, working on it!

The Cult Member (7) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!

The Cult Member (8) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!

The Cult Member (5) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!
The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! But The Cult Member (5) dodges away, off the stairs!

The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! But The Cult Member (7) dodges away, off the stairs!
The Cult Member (7) slams into the ground!
The Cult Member (7)'s lower body takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle and bruising the guts!
The Cult Member (7) looks sick!

The Mare in Armor (1) leaps forward, reaching the top of the stage!

Spike: Hey! That's my helmet!
The Drakeling (Spike) kicks The Mare in Armor (1) in the head with his left foot, but the attack is deflected by The Mare in Armor (1)'s steel helmet!
Spike: Give it back!
The Drakeling (Spike) kicks at The Mare in Armor (1) with his right foot, but The Mare in Armor (1) dodges away!
The Mare in Armor (1) falls off the stage! The Mare in Armor (1) slams into the ground!

KT: Spike! There's one coming up from behind the stage!
Spike: I need your help; I can't turn my head that way!
KT: Need more time!
Spike: We don't have any!

The Mare in Armor (2) climbs up the back of the stage!

The Cult Member (8) leaps forward, reaching the top of the stage!
The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! The Cult Member (8) is caught in the dragonfire! Her head has been burnt to a crisp! Her mane is set alight!

The Cult Member (5) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!

The Cult Member (1) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!

The Mare in Armor (2) leaps forward, reaching the top of the stage from behind!

The rope splits and burns away! The Drakeling (Kezno) is no longer pinned!

KT: That's it, I'm free!
Spike: I'll give you a congratulations later, but for now: help me!

The Mare in Armor (2) grabs The Drakeling (Spike) from behind by the left upper leg with her left front hoof!

The Drakeling (Kezno) leaps into the fray! The Drakeling (Kezno) grabs The Drakeling (Spike), wrenching him sideways! The Drakeling (Spike) swivels around!

//Hey, those are my shinguards!
Spike: Quit stealing my things!
The Drakeling (Spike) kicks The Mare in Armor (2) in the lower body with his right foot, bruising the muscle and bruising the right kidney!
The Drakeling (Spike) headbutts The Mare in Armor (2) in the head, bruising the muscle, jamming the skull through the brain and tearing apart the brain!
The Mare in Armor (2) has been knocked unconscious! The Mare in Armor (2) has been struck down!

T: (I knew you had a hard head.)
Spike: Gack! There's blood and gore all over my face, I can't see!
KT: I'll direct you!

The Drakeling (Spike) swivels around!

//Hold on, did Twilight just say something?

KT: Straight ahead, forty-five degrees down!

The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! The Cult Member (5) is caught in the dragonfire! Her upper body has been burnt to a crisp!

KT: Again, she's still there!

The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! The Cult Member (5) is caught in the dragonfire! Her lower body has been burnt to a crisp!
The Cult Member (5) gives into pain! The Cult Member (5) collapses!

The Cult Member (8) assaults The Drakeling (Spike) to no effect!

Spike: Your lips are _burnt off_, what are you trying to do?
KT: Her hair's on fire! Get away!

The Drakeling (Kezno) kicks The Cult Member (8) in the lower body with his left foot, bruising the muscle and bruising the left kidney!
The Drakeling (Spike) kicks The Cult Member (8) in the upper body with his right foot, bruising the muscle, shattering the left true ribs, jamming the left true ribs through the left lung and tearing apart the left lung!
The Cult Member (8) gives into pain! The Cult Member (8) collapses!

The Cult Member (1) leaps forward, reaching the top of the stage!

The Cult Member (7) leaps forward, climbing the stairs to the stage!

The Drakeling (Spike) swivels around!
KT: To the right, same level!

The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! The Cult Member (1) is caught in the dragonfire! Her right rear hoof has been burnt to a crisp! Her right rear leg has been burnt to a crisp!

KT: Get! Away!

The Drakeling (Kezno) grabs The Cult Member (1) by the head with his left hand! The Drakeling (Kezno) throws The Cult Member (1) by the head with his left hand!
The Cult Member (1) falls off the stage! The Cult Member (1) slams into the ground!
The Cult Member (1)'s upper body takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle and shattering the right floating ribs!
The Cult Member (1) gives into pain!

KT: Almost through the ropes, just a little bit more...
Spike: Is there another one? I hear someone else.
KT: Gaaagh!
Spike: On it!

The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! But The Drakeling (Kezno) dodges away from the flames!

KT: Wrong way, try again!

The Drakeling (Spike) swivels around!
The Drakeling (Spike) breathes fire! But The Cult Member (7) dodges away from the flames!

Spike: Did I hit her? I can't see!
KT: You're free! Gyaa, help me!

The rope splits and falls away! The Drakeling (Spike) is no longer pinned!

The Cult Member (7) grabs The Drakeling (Kezno) by the left upper arm with her right front hoof! The Cult Member (7) grabs The Drakeling (Kezno) by the throat with her left front hoof! The Drakeling (Kezno) is pinned!

//She looks like she wants to take him, pinning him to the ground by his neck. Did the cult member confuse us?

KT: Not... again...
Spike: Hold still.

The Drakeling (Spike) strikes at The Cult Member (7) in the lower body with his Fist of Justice, and it collapses into a lump of gore!
The Cult Member (7) has been struck down!

KT: Ho--... holy crap, it's all over the place...
Spike: Are you okay?
KT: Yeah, fine, covered in blood and intestines, but fine.
Spike: I know how that feels.

The Cult Members have been defeated!
Spike earned 1500 experience points!
Spike is now level 10!

[[SAVE LOCATION]]

//I help Kezno to his feet, a second after brushing the blood away from my eyes. The mess on his stomach slops off, and he wipes the rest away on the tail of the statue.
KT: That can't have been all of them.
Spike: Considering there are four more of them waiting at the end of the chamber? I doubt it.
KT: And where did that one strange unicorn go? The one overseeing the ceremony, by which I mean our abuse and murder?
Spike: I think she must have run away.
KT: Good for her. Hell, I'd run away from a performance like that.
//Performance? I'm sorry, did he see a lute and a lyre somewhere around here?
KT: When you said you were a Hero here to rescue me, I was a bit skeptical, but, crap, man, you turned two ponies into red jelly and fought off eight at the same time.
Spike: Oh, that. Uh... I probably just got lucky.
KT: If that's the type of luck you have I'm taking you straight to Mountainville as soon as this is over.
//What is that, some kind of casino and resort?
KT: (What's the plan of attack for the rest of the ponies at the end of the chamber?)
Spike: (Hmm... looks like two pegasi, an armored earth pony, and the Royal Mistress, a unicorn. The pegasi look thin, they shouldn't be much of a problem...)
//Kezno picks up one of the shinguards, turning it over in his hand.
KT: (If it helps, I used to train Spawn Scouts at disc throwing.)
Spike: (The main problem is the spellcaster. See if you can throw something at the Royal Mistress when she's trying to cast a spell, try to distract her.)
KT: (Be a lot easier if one of these ponies had a knife or something on them.)
Spike: (You think they'll give us time to search them? They haven't attacked now because the stage is a great defensive position, as soon as we step off they might jump us. I'm going to try something.)
KT: (_Try_ something? You're going to _try_ something?!)
//I walk off the stage, down the stairs, and point at the Royal Mistress in green robes. She is hiding behind the Mare in Armor.
Spike: ...
//Crap, what was I going to say?
RM: It's rude to point, you know.
KT: It's also rude to abduct people for sacrifices, so you can stuff it!
Spike: He does have a point.
MA: No, you have a point.
Cult Pegasus: No, he's point-_ing_, there's a difference.
MA: Excuse my grammar; I haven't studied it on account of the expected end of the world happening today that _he_ ruined!
KT: You're blaming him for stopping what was never going to happen anyway? I do understand you may not be in possession of the most straightforward mental faculties, because, well, _doomsday cult_, but don't blame others for your own failures.
CP: That's a misconception; we're less a doomsday cult than a rebirth cult. We don't believe the world needs to be 'destroyed to be rebuilt' as much as just reorganized!
MA: Under a banner of unquestioning and strict loyalty to our leaders.
CP: Exactly!
KT: That sure makes me feel better about being abducted and killed.
CP: Hey, _someone_ has to die for Alipheese to enter the world and it isn't going to be us.
MA: Well, it wasn't supposed to be us, at least. You kind of turned the death tables on us.
CP: But they're going to do a full three-sixty and flip back on you!
MA: So... the table of death is doing a backflip, I guess?
KT: That is honestly the worst smacktalk I have ever heard.
CP: I'll smack your talk, right out of your mouth!
//Kezno groans.
RM: Why are you pointing again?
Spike: I finally remembered what I was going to say!
RM: Thank Celestia.
//I clear my throat.
Spike: Behind you is the way out. In front of you I stand. I won't begrudge you your choice, but I will oblige you: flee or be killed.
MA: ...So, Royal Mistress? What do we do?
RM: Easy. The purple one is the real power. I will use my abilities to subdue him, and we will get two drakelings to share between us for the cost of one. Attack.
MA: As you wish.
Spike: As you wish.

[[SAVE LOCATION]]

The Cult Pegasus (1) charges at The Drakeling (Spike)!
//Keep your feet moving. Not energetically or excitedly, but... calmly? Is that a thing you can do? I think so. Don't attack just yet, be patient.
The Cult Pegasus (1) attacks The Drakeling (Spike) but The Drakeling (Spike) dodges away!

The Cult Pegasus (2) charges at The Drakeling (Spike)!
The Cult Pegasus (2) attacks The Drakeling (Spike) but The Drakeling (Spike) dodges away!

The Royal Mistress points at The Drakeling (Spike) and starts to cast a spell!
The Drakeling (Kezno) throws a steel shinguard at The Royal Mistress!
The spinning steel shinguard strikes The Royal Mistress in the head, bruising the horn!
The Royal Mistress loses her spell!

KT: You've done enough magic for the day!
RM: Insolent fool!

The Mare in Armor charges at The Drakeling (Spike)!
The Mare in Armor attacks The Drakeling (Spike) but The Drakeling (Spike) dodges away!
The Drakeling (Spike) counterattacks!
The Drakeling (Spike) strikes The Mare in Armor in the lower body from the side with his Fist of Justice, shattering the spine, tearing apart the lower spine's nervous tissue, jamming the bone through the right kidney and tearing apart the right kidney!
The Mare in Armor is propelled away by the force of the blow!

The Mare in Armor slams into The Royal Mistress!
The Royal Mistress's left front leg takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle!
The Royal Mistress's right front hoof takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle and bruising the bone!
The Mare in Armor's head takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle and bruising the skull!
The Royal Mistress falls over!
The Mare in Armor gives into pain!

KT: Taste justice!
Spike: I don't have any iron on me.

The Cult Pegasus (1) kicks The Drakeling (Spike) in the head with her right rear hoof, bruising the muscle!

//Woah, almost took my head off!
Spike: See, this is why I need a helmet, so this sort of thing doesn't happen.

The Cult Pegasus (2) kicks at The Drakeling (Spike) with her left rear hoof, but The Drakeling (Spike) dodges away!
The Drakeling (Spike) counterattacks!
The Drakeling (Spike) punches at The Cult Pegasus (2) with his right hand, but The Cult Pegasus (2) flies away!

Spike: Come back here!
CP: Not a problem!

The Royal Mistress stands up.

The Cult Pegasus (1) grabs The Drakeling (Spike) by the left upper arm from behind with her left front leg! The Cult Pegasus (1) grabs The Drakeling (Spike) by the right upper arm from behind with her right front leg!
The Cult Pegasus (1) drags The Drakeling (Spike) into the air!

Spike: Wyaaugh, let go of me!
CP1: At this height? Are you sure?
Spike: Yes!
CP1: Nah, I think you'll have more fun up here.

The Cult Pegasus (2) grabs The Drakeling (Spike) by the right lower leg with her left front leg! The Cult Pegasus (2) grabs The Drakeling (Spike) by the left upper leg with her right front leg!
The Drakeling (Spike) is pinned!

The Drakeling (Spike) struggles in vain against the grip of The Cult Pegasus (1)'s left front leg on The Drakeling (Spike)'s left upper arm!
The Royal Mistress points at The Drakeling (Spike) and starts to cast a spell!

Spike: Get off of me!
CP1: That's not how it's pronounced! It's 'get me off'!
Spike: _No it isn't_!
CP2: I didn't get as many chances to drain the other captive as I would have liked, so do me a favor and give me all you've got! I want a lot!
CP1: No fair, I want some too!
CP2: Yeah, so be a good boy, and don't wear out too quickly! You've got a lot of apologizing to do!
Spike: The only sorry person in this room is you lot!

The Drakeling (Kezno) throws a steel shinguard at The Cult Pegasus (1)!
The spinning steel shinguard strikes The Cult Pegasus (1) in the left wing, bruising the muscle and shattering the bone!

CP1: Kyaaa!

The Cult Pegasus (1) releases the grip of The Cult Pegasus (1)'s left front leg on The Drakeling (Spike)'s left upper arm. The Cult Pegasus (1) releases the grip of The Cult Pegasus (1)'s right front leg on The Drakeling (Spike)'s right upper arm.
The Drakeling (Spike) slumps backwards, no longer pinned!

The Royal Mistress casts Stupefy!
The flying beam strikes The Cult Pegasus (2) in the head! The Cult Pegasus (2) is knocked unconscious!

The Cult Pegasus (1) slams into the ground!
The Cult Pegasus (1)'s right wing takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle and shattering the bone! The Cult Pegasus (1)'s upper body takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle and bruising the right lung!
The Cult Pegasus (1) gives into pain!

The Drakeling (Spike) slams into the ground!
The Drakeling (Spike)'s right lower leg takes the full force of the impact, bruising the muscle and tearing the scale!

The Cult Pegasus (2) slams into the ground!
The Cult Pegasus (2)'s left rear hoof takes the full force of the impact, shattering the bone!

The Drakeling (Spike) stands up.

Spike: Nice shot.
KT: One more left to make!

The Drakeling (Spike) charges at The Royal Mistress!
The Royal Mistress kicks The Drakeling (Spike) in the left lower leg with her right front hoof, tearing the scale, bruising the muscle and bruising the bone!
//See, this is why I need shinguards, so this sort of thing doesn't happen.
The Drakeling (Spike) strikes at The Royal Mistress in the upper body with his Fist of Justice, bruising the muscle, shattering the left true ribs, jamming the left true ribs through the heart and tearing apart the heart!
The Drakeling (Spike)'s right hand has lodged firmly in the wound!

Spike: Aaah! Let go of me!
RM: You're... the one... decided... cave in my chest...

The Royal Mistress speaks a word of power, forming symbols in the air!

Spike: No! You should be dead! Stop it!

The Drakeling (Spike) struggles in vain against the grip of The Royal Mistress's left true ribs on The Drakeling (Spike)'s right hand!
//I can't get away from her!
The Drakeling (Kezno) throws a small gneiss rock at The Royal Mistress! The spinning small gneiss rock strikes The Royal Mistress in the lower back molar, and the severed part flies off in an arc!

RM: May you rot...

The Royal Mistress casts the spell! A terrible sense of dread fills the room!

The Royal Mistress gives into pain! The Royal Mistress faints! The Royal Mistress collapses!

The Cult Elite have been defeated!
Spike earned 1000 experience points!
Spike is now level 11!

[[SAVE LOCATION]]

//I dart my eyes back and forth, checking the chamber for any happenings. Behind me, Kezno turns around, taking a step away from the statue, and then reassures all the parts of his body are still there, and functional.
KT: Uh... did that, uh, feel really weird to you?
//I take my hand out of the mare's chest cavity before snakes or maggots or roaches start crawling out of it, or some crazy crap like that.
//Hold on, what if...
Spike: Is that... is that how the rebirth thing works? Is she being reborn?
//Kezno looks me over once, trying to determine if I'm being serious.
KT: ...No. Drakelings are bound to one person at a time only. The rebirth only works for them (and only once, unless it's re-established). Infatuation stays, though.
//...I should probably know more about this stuff, even if it's not going to effect me.
Spike: ...Okay. Must be the feel of a fizzled spell.
KT: I sure hope so.
Spike: Did you see where those shinguards and helmet went to?
KT: What? You're considering looting these lunatics? Let's get out of here, the way's open right there!
Spike: The helmet and shinguards were mine in the first place.
//That's not true.
Spike: Uh, well, basically mine. Vultures keepers.
KT: They stole your things from you? That's rather low. Anything worth worrying about, or can we leave?
Spike: Nah, I didn't have any gold on me. Just a telescope that was kind of nice, a few useless books...
//'T: You know that big bag of money the mayor gave you as a reward? This is worth at least three of those, and that's just what the government would give you to take it off the market. Dragon hunters would give you at least twice that.'
KT: ...There's something else, isn't there.
Spike: If that falls into the wrong hands, it can do a lot of damage.
//Kezno walks over to me, holding out the helmet and shinguards.
KT: Then suit up, Hero. We've got a job to do.
Spike: You don't have to do anything; get out of here while you still can.
KT: If it wasn't for you, neither I nor my rebirth-mate would be alive. You rescued me for no money, no vengeance, and you didn't even know who I was, but out of the strength of your own heart risked your life for mine. I owe you at least this.
Spike: You don't owe me anything. I'm a Hero, this is what I do.
KT: Besides, if it gives me a chance at some more of those cult suckers, you'll have to pin me down to get me to stay away.
//Kezno cracks his knuckles, looking nasty.
Spike: I get it. Do you think you can make a bow and arrows from sinew and bone, from one of these ponies? The Royal Mistress maybe?
KT: Maybe, but A: I'm planning on going as far around her as possible when I leave, and B: I want to get out of here before some of the ponies start waking up or realizing their injuries aren't that bad.
Spike: Right.
//I run out, avoiding the Royal Mistress by a wide berth, Kezno hot on my heels.

//We sneak around the cave for an hour or so, exploring the various natural caverns. There's nothing at all to be found except some moldy bread and a few ragged sheets in the communal sleeping room. Eventually we return to a locked door that was skipped earlier, on account of there being no key anywhere in the cave.
Spike: (Saccr-Ulkip has to be here.)
KT: (Who?)
Spike: (Their leader. It'd make sense for her to keep everything.)
KT: (Cults are often very hierarchical, after all.)
Spike: (How are we going to break down the door?)
KT: (It's made of wood, can't you burn it down?)
Spike: (The door's probably an inch or so thick, damp around the edges because of the dirt, and we're in an unventilated area. No, I don't think I'll burn it down.)
KT: (Is this important thing something you need to have, or is it more important other people don't have it?)
Spike: (Uh, what were you planning?)
KT: (There's a river nearby, right? An underground cave with unsealed walls like this means they have to use some sort of pump or magic to keep out the water. If we block off the entrance to the cave, eventually that system will fail, and the caves will flood.)
Spike: (...I've seen Saccr-Ulkip throw huge boulders with her magic; I don't think we can block this cave off.)
KT: (Phooey.)
Spike: (If the hinges were on this side, we could unscrew them...)
KT: (What about the handle? How strong is it?)
//Kezno reaches out his hand, pulling the handle normally. He then tries the other direction.
//The door opens by a crack.
KT: ...
Spike: Don't look at me!
KT: We just spent an hour running around this damp mudhole because you couldn't be bothered to check if they installed the handle wrong.
Spike: Ponies don't have hands! Why would they have a door with a handle in the first place?!
KT: If these cultists do have a door, it's probably picked up from the reject pile, or damaged trash. And what would qualify for the reject pile? A door with the handle installed backwards!
Spike: Don't be mad because you didn't think of it earlier either.
KT: This entire day has been the most excruciating waste of time and effort.
Spike: You shouldn't forget about being abducted by the ponies.
KT: Yeah, they're wastes too.
Spike: (So, jump in on three sound good?)
KT: (Sure. One... two...)
//Three!
//Kezno kicks the door open and we leap in, ready to do battle!

[[SAVE LOCATION]]

The ☼magic mechanism☼ attached to the wooden door is triggered! Two beams shoot out from the wall!
The flying beam strikes The Drakeling (Kezno) in the upper body from behind! The Drakeling (Kezno) is Charmed!
The flying beam strikes The Drakeling (Spike) in the head from the side, but the attack is deflected by The Drakeling (Spike)'s steel helmet!

Spike: Kezno! Kezno, talk to me!
//Silence, as he stands there, staring a thousand yards ahead.
Saccr-Ulkip: Hmm. It seems metal armor reflects beams of magic. Good to know.
Spike: What did you do to him?!
SU: Not important.
//Saccr-Ulkip stands in front of a desk covered in fine cloth, surrounded by a number of statues and baubles and shining trinkets. On the desk are two books, one of which is Dragon Movements in the Era of Abandonment and the other, not one of the books from my bag. The rest of them are tossed into a wastebin.
Spike: You know, not all of those books are completely useless.
SU: Are you kidding me? 'The Real Princess Hazel'? I'll just say, the words 'turgid penis' and 'tiny little barbs' belong nowhere in the biography of a political figure.
//Glad I didn't read to that part.
Spike: I mostly meant the atlas.
SU: That thing is almost as old as Canterlot itself.
Spike: (How old is the City on the Hill, anyway?)
T: (Nearly seven hundred years old by now. I think its heptcentennial is coming up in a few weeks.)
SU: But are we going to keep wasting time and words, or are you willing to listen to what I have to say?
Spike: Knowing me, probably wasting time and words.
SU: My offer is generous, as a powerful Hero with such a frightening display deserves. You--
Spike: Surrender and be your rebirth-mate, I know. Here's my counteroffer: you bleed out and I get my stuff back.
SU: I am not naive enough to offer the glory of immortality to those who refuse it categorically in my search for followers, and I am not that naive here. You will leave, never to come back, and in return I can offer to forget this great injustice you have caused me. Else, I will best you.
Spike: Your cult is broken and ceremony interrupted; you have no leveraging power and I'm not leaving without that book.
SU: Ceremony? Who cares about that silly little thing! Do you know how easy it is to convince another group of desperate suckers there's an eternal reward for them and all the world they envied will be destroyed, if they just follow me? One charm spell and a little research about dragon endocrinology and I would have finished watching them _volunteer_ themselves to pass up a chance at immortality to give it to me!
Spike: 'A little research about dragon endocrinology'?
SU: Admittedly, drakeling bonding doesn't work as I expected; it seems there were some residual effects of previous copulations on the first sacrifice that allowed him to resist total mental dominance. But, if my ears didn't fail me, you said you were a free drakeling...
//That book of migration patterns would lead her right to another drakeling if I don't defeat her now.
Spike: I won't let you rebuild your schemes and hurt more people! Prepare to be destroyed!
SU: If destroyed is what you want to call it, believe me, I am most certainly prepared...