The smell of human charcoal fluttered through the air. I could only walk a straight line through the fire and smoke. I was alone in the dead city again. The constant tapping of a geiger counter drilled into my bones. The burning clicking, radiological fire digging into everything lit my skin ablaze. I couldn't scream, I couldn't move. I could only look out over the ruins of my greatest mistake. The woodpeckers drilled on to the chorus of radioactive death.

Tick Tick Tick

"Ah fuck!" I tried to jump out and upright from whatever held me, but the grip only grew tighter. "No!" I forced my arms out, finding only warmth and a soft coat around me. "What the fuck!?"

The warmth shifted away. "What?"

I rolled to my side and fell hard against the floor. "What the fuck happened?! Songhai, you fuck!" I sat upright and rubbed my eyes. "Where is he?!" I looked up to find Celestia looking over a deep white bed. I cocked my head slowly. "Whoa...what the fuck?"

Celestia stood up and walked off the side next to me. "You're asking what?" She looked back to the bed. "What was that?"

I gritted my teeth. "Nightmares." I rubbed my face and sat back. "Just a nightmare...."

Celestia stared at the bed. "You were shaking when I put you down. And you just...." She turned to me with an extremely worried look. "Are you alright?"

I rubbed my head. "I'm locked in a room with a horse who was just spooning me." I looked down at my body. "I'm naked." I turned back to face the overly worried mare. "And I still don't have a way home. No, I'm not fucking okay." I stood up, wobbling like a drunk as I stood before her. "I'd say I'm pretty fucking far from okay." I held my head, a deep pounding slowly started to overtake my numb mind. "Now why the fuck were you spooning me?!"

Celestia dragged her hoof across the marble tiles. "As I said, I put you into your room. But you started shaking rather violently. I was worried, so I brought you up to my quarters."

I looked around. The room was nearly identical, only bigger and more ornate than the last. "So you spooned me? A grown fucking man...."

"You stopped shaking." She frowned softly. "You did--"

"Have you ever been irradiated?" I planted my feet and stretched my arms. "It's fucking terrible. And maybe having something around me stopped me from shaking, but that doesn't mean you couldn't have just jammed me up against a wall. It wasn't a fucking seizure." I rubbed my eyes. "You really need to stop worrying about me, and worry about finding a way to put me back where I fucking belong!"

Celestia's tail crimped upward at the base. "Well excuse me for trying to--"

"Wow...fucking subtle." I rubbed my eyes. "Did you seriously just do that?"

"What?" Celestia looked around. "Do what?"

I felt an ugly, worn down glare rust over my face. "Tail."

Celestia turned her head and spotted what I was talking about. "I didn't do that on purpose." She flicked her tail, getting rid of the awkward gesture. She wore a soft bit of blush around her cheeks. "I--"

"I never thought I'd see a horse blush, and now that I have I don't know what the fuck to do with myself." I scratched my ear and looked to the door. "Should I just go?"

Celestia huffed and walked to the door. "I really didn't even notice--"

"So you're naturally into bestiality.... I mean, even for a horse person, that shit is pretty fucked."

Celestia stopped dead before the door. She tapped the ground with her hoof and swung herself around to face me. "Oh? Bestiality? You're not a sapient creature? You're some sort of animal?"

"Me personally? Probably. I'm sure there are other people that I'd say deserve to be called normal or good, but I'm a fucking-- I'm not good, I'm pretty much evil if anything."

Celestia cocked her head. "I expect you to elaborate, but then what is this?" She pointed a hoof towards my groin. "Was it because I touched you? Are you so starved for contact--"

"This happens when I wake up." I lied through my teeth. I shook my head gently. "Don't flatter yourself. I've grown up with horses, I've--" I shook my head hard. "Why the fuck are we talking about this?!"

"You what?" Celestia walked up to me and poked my stomach. "I try to do something  nice and you claim I'm--"

"Don't fucking poke me."  I stepped back and put my hands up to block her. "I've been here a week! How have you not established a no fucking touch rule!?"

Celestia grumbled and turned her side to me. "How have you not stopped being such a violent ass?" She flung a wing out and slid a feather down my knee.

I stared at her, rage welling up inside my stomach. "Why must you test me? We are both fucking murderers apparently, why would you provoke me?"

Celestia turned to me in two long steps. "Because at some point I hope you'll stop being so violent--"

"Stop-" I put my hand on her front. "-fucking-" I pushed her back a step. "-hitting on me." I put both of my hands out and stared at her. "I have som- I have someone back home, and you--"

"Your wife." Celestia took a deep breath. "You know, you could indulge me while you're here. Perhaps not in such a sexual manner, but you could try to act like you're enjoying your time here."

"I did enjoy myself. I cut two of your guards manes right the fuck off. It was great." I put my arms out at my sides. "This." I pointed to the ground and made a quick circle with my finger. "This shit, this is weird."

Celestia sighed and looked over to the door. "Speaking of, we need to discuss your little training." She turned back to face me. "And...Able, you didn't seem too worried about your wife, more worried about yourself."

I stared at her. "Don't test me horse, just don't. It's a whole load of shit you don't want to step into--"

Celestia stepped up to me and tapped my head with her chin. "I've been trying to talk to you on a personal level, if only to help you adjust. And if you are sent home, I doubt anything you tell me--"

"She's a seventeen year old whore I stole from a pimp. I call her my wife because it's what she wants, not what I want." I stared into Celestia's eyes. "Is that what you wanted to hear? Does that make you hitting on me, poking me, trying to make me mad any fucking better?"

Celestia's expression grew grim. "I suppose not. But you seem--"

I snarled angrily and turned away. "Look. You want to talk about this? How about you tell me why perfect magic land has overt racists running the military?!"

Celestia didn't say a word. She walked around beside me and put her wing against my back. She tapped me along and turned me towards the door. "Shall we then? If we're going to talk, I'd rather do it in private." There was a certain graveness to her voice that cut the tone of playfulness she was batting around in two.

I licked my lips as we walked towards the door. "You're...older." I took a breath. "I didn't want a fucking wife." I stepped out from under her wing. "I asked her because it was what she wanted." I felt a knot lodge in my throat. "She's too young to know...but I--"

"What do you want from her?" Celestia turned to face me. "I've been alive a few thousand years, I've outlived spouses and been through quite a bit, so I suppose you're asking the right person given the lack of your species."

I clenched my hand into a fist. "I just wan-- I need her to be safe. I just don't want to see her hurt anymore."

Celestia nodded with her eyes shut. "Do you love her?"

I heard my heart beat once. It echoed in my ears. I moved on towards the door. "Not in the way she loves me. I'm never going to live up to the expectations she has for me...." I stopped at the door. "You know, if I go back, I don't even know if I'll survive. And I'm starting to think it would be better if I didn't." I tapped my fingers against the cold stone wall. "God I hope she's okay."

Celestia pulled the door open with her magic. "I'm sure she is--"

"Then you haven't seen my home." I stepped out into the hall. I pointed around the room. "This shit? Talking horses? Magic crap? I adjusted pretty quick right?" I took a deep breath. "This isn't shit compared to some of the crazy garbage I've seen. This isn't shit compared to Maine." I rubbed my head. "This isn't anywhere close to the syrup covered mutants they had making bird noises and fucking...." I felt my skin creep. "Somehow...talking horses doesn't quite stack up."

Celestia walked out and shut her door softly. "Syrup covered--"

"Mutants." I took a deep breath. "Shit was not good back in Maine."

Celestia hummed. "Well, if you're tired of talking about yourself. I could always--"

"If you try to bitch about being single, or make any suggestive comments, I'm going to leave--"

Celestia coughed into her hoof. "I do apologize for that. And I was going to talk more about the guard problems and the past." She walked down the hall. "What was that you said to me? Don't flatter yourself."

I looked down at myself. "What the fuck about this is worth flattering?" I ran my hand over one of my scars. "Nasty shit and bad memories all around."

Celestia paused at the stairs out of the tower. "I'm sure I could find something. But right now, you need to explain that screaming episode, and I'll let you know about our guard policy, okay?"

I rubbed my chest. "Sure.... But your guard policies are wrong."

"I'm sure compared to your violent world, but it works for--"

"There's some saying my friend used to say." I started off down the stairs. "If you want peace, prepare to fight for it. Or some shit like that."

"Indeed...indeed. But I think I fought for it hard enough in the past." Celestia's voice echoed down the staircase. "For now, a little wash, a little food, and maybe we can teach you to be civil."

"I'm not your fucking science pro--"

"Try. Maybe we can try and teach you to be civil." Next Chapter: Night Problems Estimated time remaining: 1 Hour, 23 Minutes