Octavia was lying on her bed, which was also Lyra’s bed being the only one in the house, and reading a book. It was all going fine until Lyra came in. “Hi, Lyra,” she said. But instead of giving a response, Lyra continued to march forward, get on the bed, and force her girlfriend into a kiss that lasted about two distressed attempts to push her away before she stopped it on her own.

“You aren’t doing anything,” Lyra said.

“I didn’t want it. I only let you do it because of the legal obligation.”

“I’m not letting you go until you put something into it.”

“Haven’t you fulfilled it already?”

“Yeah, but doing the minimum required of us is one thing and actually doing enough that they renew us is another. They’ve made it very clear to me that I need to do more. Or we could do something else that young adults like, but unfortunately, you’re Octavia.”

“I really am beginning to think this was a mistake....”

“I know you don’t like it, but it’s the only way.”

“I just don’t know if it’s worth it.”

“Come on, it’s like thirty seconds a week if you cooperate. Is that just too much for you?”

“The only reason I’m doing it is the money, so... I don’t really want—”

“Well, hey, Miss Upper Class See Celestia Every Month Dream Job at Sixteen, that’s what most ponies have to deal with for a third of their waking lives. And what do you have to do? Kiss your girlfriend every week. I just can’t imagine what that’s like.”

“Most ponies’ jobs don’t involve sexual assault....”

“It isn’t even a minute. You’re so spoilt. And do you really hate it as much as you’re making it sound?”

“No, but—”

“See? You just can’t handle anything. I’d like to see you pick strawberries for hours every day for years on end and tell me how bad this all is.”

“I never said worse things don’t exist.”

“Yeah, but the worse things are what most ponies do. So let me kiss you so we can have more money and the glory of being on Equestria’s greatest programme. And look like you care.”

Octavia nodded and let her do it. She wanted to grit her teeth through it, but she wasn’t allowed to.

Spike and Twilight were having lunch, a salad so complex it defied description.

“It’s, like, five ingredients,” said camerapony #5. “You’re just lazy.”

“Who’s the transcription expert here? Do your job.”

“Twilight?” Spike said. “Why is your horn glowing?”

“I’m clopping.”

“Um... really?”

“I’m really fucking horny, okay? You can look under the table if you want.”

“You could just go away.”

“To clop? My problem isn’t that bad.”

“You just clop a lot. You didn’t even have a problem until right now. Also, it is.”

“Well, I’m going to be just fine.”

“It’s kind of weird just seeing your horn and knowing....”

“You’re thinking it every time I take a shower, don’t act like it’s something new.”

“Yeah, but I can see it.”

“Fine. I’ll be right back.”

If there was anything bad about the relationship Applejack formed with Rainbow Dash, it was how often it made her want to have sex with a mare when none were available. But much like her partner, rather than take advantage of her celebrity status or clop, Applejack always opted to rub her hooves against something and be frustrated. In this case, the object was a pillow, although she had gone beyond what she normally did and into cuddling the chosen object, trying to pretend it was her. This included lying on a bed with it, petting it, and talking to it, which eventually drove Big Mac to open her door without even knocking first.

“What are you doing?”

She turned her head to face him, keeping the pillow in the same place. “It’s just been a whahle without Rainbow.”

“You haven’t done this before....”

“Thanks, Ah know. Just let me crah an’ such, okay? Ah don’t want other ponies in here who aren’t her raht now.”

Big Mac took the risk-averse strategy, closing the door and getting back to his own day.

Apple Bloom was bored out of her mind at school.

Having won the previous two rounds, Rainbow Dash was off to Chevik for the first of two races at the only course in the eastern half of the country approved for international events, although much like Canterlot’s it had two major layouts. But the race was a week in the future, and what she was actually being driven to was a day of lying to ponies about how much she liked both Equestria Spring and whichever pony she was talking to.

“You know, this stuff is only going to get worse as you move up,” the driver said, seriously thinking it would motivate her to be less mopey.

“I know...” said the world-saviour in the passenger seat. “I’m just not used to it yet, okay? Nopony wanted me for stuff like this when I sucked.”

“You seem in a worse mood than you were last time.”

“Yeah, ‘cause now I know what it’s gonna be like. Before I thought hey, just maybe it’ll be fun. But now I know how boring it’ll be.”

“That should be a good thing. You know what to expect, so there’s less to worry about.”

“You’re not making it sound less boring.”

“That should be a good thing.” Next Chapter: Chapter 63: No Angle Brackets For You Lol Estimated time remaining: 11 Hours, 30 Minutes