For the purpose of making “the inside” more like an actual group instead of some scattered individuals who happened to share a property, the eight in on the secret were together at an inoffensive family restaurant in Sparkstown.

“Why is Vinyl Scratch here?” Twilight said.

“I accidentally told her the secret,” Dash explained. “I saw her eyes too and—”

“For fuck’s sakes.” She made her horn glow and looked to Vinyl. “What orders have you given her?”

“She won’t lie about anything.”

“Tell me what you said to her or I’m going to kill you.”

“Don’t kill her,” Dash pleaded, “I like her. I let her do it. And you’re on the same side, right? You’re both evil.”

“What did you tell her, Vinyl Scratch?”

“Nothing yet.”

“I still don’t trust you, but I’ll wait to kill you until I have evidence.”

They quickly split into pairs of Rainbow Dash and Vinyl Scratch, Twilight and Spike, Applejack and Big Mac, and Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. When the waiter came, she had good reason to be shocked, so she was.

“Half the world-saviours?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Dash said. “We’re here for a reason, okay?”

“I’m not giving you an autograph,” Twilight said.

“But... Twilight....”

“I’m getting the Xtreme Mmentaler Melt.”

“Okay. And holy crap, Spike, I have so many questions?”

“The How Can Soybeans Taste This Much Like Meat, That’s Just Creepy Burger.”

“Okay. And Rainbow Dash, what do you think—”

“The Better Than Mindless Sexual Bliss Salad.”

This went on for the rest of the table, then finally she departed.

“Did she really freak out over us?” Twilight said. “She must be new around here.”

“Yeah,” Spike agreed.

“What did you just say?” Applejack said.

“‘I like Hydropolis’,” Pinkie Pie repeated.

“If it ain’t already obvious, Ah lahke Aquia.”

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Ah just lahke teams that get all their money from legal sources.”

“Ambiguous, not illegal. Besides, I like teams that let the other team play too instead of passing to themselves the entire game.”

“It ain’t mah fault if your ponies are too stupid to even get the ball.”

“Hey, this is supposed to be fun,” Dash interrupted. “Both of you calm down.”

“Why should we listen to you?” Pinkie Pie said.

“Would you... listen to Twilight?”

“Sure.”

“This is supposed to be fun,” Twilight said. “Both of you calm down.”

“Twilight and I have something to clear up,” Dash said to the entire table. “Which of us has all the power? If we gave you conflicting commands, who would you obey?”

“You’re supposed to obey me, not the other way around,” Vinyl said.

“Can’t you rule together?” Sweetie Belle said.

“Since Rainbow Dash clearly already has a master and Vinyl Scratch shouldn’t be here, I’m the only one left suitable for the job,” Twilight said.

“Whah don’t Ah have any power?” Applejack said.

“Do you really want to order ponies around?” Dash said.

“Well... no.”

“Ah say we vote,” Apple Bloom said. “Ah pick Rainbow Dash because Ah lahke AJ.”

“I pick Twilight because she’s smart and stuff,” Sweetie Belle said.

“Same as Apple Bloom,” Big Mac said.

“I pick Rainbow Dash because I like her directly,” said Vinyl Scratch.

“I pick Twilight for the same reason as Vinyl Scratch but for her instead,” Spike said.

“Hmm...” Pinkie Pie said as everyone waited anxiously. “I’m goin’ with Sweetie Belle.”

Conveniently seated next to the pegasus, Twilight put a hoof on hers. “Want to rule together?”

“Let’s do it.”

The rest of the table cheered.

“Did you hear that, Rainbow Dash?” Spike said. “Pinkie Pie thinks she could beat you at something athletic.”

“What is it?”

“I could beat you in a bike race.”

“Oh, totally. My strength is in my wings. I’m not that good on land compared to what you’d think from my fitness level.”

And thus ended the last conversation with more than two participants.

Twilight signed the bill. “I hope you all found this meeting tolerable,” she said. Everyone weakly said “yeah” or shrugged. “Good. Sweetie Belle, you’ll have the honour of carrying out the first order.”

“What is it?”

“You’ll move the milk in your household’s refrigerator from the door to the top shelf. And don’t move it back before Rarity.”

“I’ll carry that out to the best of my ability.”

“Good.” Next Chapter: Chapter 61: The Apple Bloom/Diamond Tiara Rape Chronicles, Part 2 Estimated time remaining: 13 Hours, 10 Minutes