Like so many towns that were host to world-saviours, Ponyville had gone from being a fairly small place to a slightly small place in a matter of months. There hadn’t been a public park or more than a thousand ponies before any of its residents had a show, but now suddenly everyone wanted to be involved. Whether it needed to exist or not, the four main characters were together at an open field with the occasional tree, a youth hoofball game distractingly taking place in the background.

“So...” Sweetie Belle said, “...How about that weather?”

“You know, we know what happened yesterday,” Rainbow Dash said. “We know what the problem was, it’s not going to happen again, and bitching about it won’t change anything.”

“That’s not really what I meant....”

“There was a good reason we couldn’t do it, but ponies like you like to whinge for hours about half a fucking sandwich getting wet without knowing what was going on behind the scenes.”

“I wasn’t trying to complain—”

“What else could ‘how about that weather’ possibly mean? How about that craaazy weather we’re having because our pegasi are so fucking incompetent.” She stepped closer. “Well, I’m one of those pegasi, and let me tell you, it’s not that fucking simple.”

“Rainbow,” Applejack said. “She di’n’t mean to complain, you don’t have ta yell at ‘er.”

“What else could—”

“She mean’ it in the ‘Ah can’t really talk good’ kinda way, Ah don’t think it’s about what happened yesterday.”

She looked back to Sweetie Belle. “I guess should say I’m sorry.”

“Then say it.”

“I’m sorry.” Rainbow backed away to where she was before. “You know, we should go somewhere private so that we can Appledash.”

“Using that as a verb destructioned my brain,” Twilight said.

“Well, what do you think we should do?”

“I know what I’d like to do, but it’s a thing for ponies with booksmarts and attention spans.”

“Then that’s two votes for hiding somewhere. That’s your vote, right, AJ?”

“Sure.”

“I wouldn’t mind seeing Appledashness,” Sweetie Belle said. “I’m not sure about the sex I’m assuming you’re going to do, but we’ll see.”

“So where are we going?” Rainbow said. “There’s nowhere obvious to hide.”

“We could just do everythin’ right here.”

“I mean, I do want to, but....”

“It’ll be fahne. Ah mean, it’s what they want to see.” She pointed to the audience of six ponies that had gathered ten metres away.

“Yeah, but most of the ponies who’ve come by us so far didn’t join the audience, they just went on their way.”

“And you think that tahpe ah pony would mahnd seein’ a little sex?”

“In the middle of a park, within sight of twenty-two foals? I think yeah.”

“Wow, Ah can’t believe you’re bein’ so uptaht about this. You wanted to do it.”

“I don’t want to traumatise dozens of ponies of any age for such a selfish reason.”

“Okay, fahne. Twahlaht, take us somewhere.”

One spell later, they were in a room five metres to a side, the floor, walls, and ceiling all smooth, light grey slate. There were two air vents in opposite corners near the ceiling and a lamp in one corner, the room otherwise having no features, including obvious exits.

“Er...” Applejack said, “Where are we?”

“I can assure you that nopony will bother you here.”

“But where are we?”

“Have fun.” She teleported herself and Sweetie Belle back to the park.

“Where did you take them?”

“You know all that you need to. So how have you been? Anything one wouldn’t expect?”

“I’ve been trying to learn Basic Ignition, but the one time I tried it, I just burned myself and had to go to Zecora.”

“It’s going to be a good several years before you can learn that.”

“You said you learned it at my age....”

“Yeah, that was to make a point about how great I am. If you’re just average, fire is a long way away right now.”

“But it’ll be so useful for forest adventures.”

“It doesn’t matter how useful it would be, you won’t be able to do it at your age unless you abandon any other spells. And practising teleportation. And you just sit there all day trying to light things on fire for weeks. Then you’ll get the hang of it if you haven’t melted one of your vital organs first.”

“Will I have?”

“Yes.”

“When can I finally hurt ponies?”

“Right now. You have nice, hard hooves.”

“You know what I mean.”

“You pretty much have to wait until you’re fifteen or sixteen unless you want to be a specialist.”

She sighed. “I know, it just sucks.”

An hour later, Rainbow Dash and Applejack were still in the slate room.

“Ah need the bathroom,” Applejack said.

“Well, Twilight forgot about us, so you’re fucked.”

“She probably thinks we’re still havin’ sex.”

“We’re gonna die.”

“Even if she did forget us, it won’t be for that long.”

“And then he stabbed her in her leg,” Sweetie Belle said, “And that finally got her to give him the bracelet. None of us thought he could hold a knife so well.”

“Wow. So who did he go after next?”

“Well, he chose her boyfriend, because he figured the whole honour thing was still on. He caught him and got a couple slashes in the leg off, then she told him it was off because he had stabbed her. He went for the filly standing next to him next, but before he could get a hit in, the boyfriend jumped at him and he lost the knife. So the filly he was attacking picked it up, in her mouth, of course, and after getting punched a few times, he managed to break free and he ran out of the school. Scootaloo and a couple of the other faster foals chased after him, but he was way faster and they gave up pretty quickly. We haven’t seen him since.”

“That’s crazy. But hey, you know what’s even worse?”

“What?”

“I haven’t done anything about all those ponies who just heard Rainbow and AJ talking about having sex out in the open.”

“We’re foalnapping them into a reality show until the relationships go public,” camerapony #1 said, “So we’ve got it covered.”

“Okay, that’s good.”

“Also, one of you still needs to do something illegal.”

“I’ll injure the next pony who comes by.”

“Also, it would be nice if you all agreed to reveal the relationships soon, because there are a lot of episodes we’re holding onto.”

“I don’t know when that’ll happen.”

The following half hour was Twilight standing around waiting for a pony.

“You think I should get them, Sweetie Belle?”

“You should know better than me.”

“I think I will.” She went back to the room.

“It’s about time,” Rainbow said.

“I should just leave you here with that attitude.”

“Then I guess you want your girlfriend to suffer.”

She took them back to the park.

“Behind you, Twilight,” Sweetie Belle said.

“What? Hey, get back here!” she said to the pony walking at a normal speed. She teleported in front of him. “I need you for something.”

“You need me for something? Am I going on an adventure?”

“Over here.” She led him to the other three.

“What do you call that fur colour?” Rainbow said.

“Dendam,” he replied, referring to a flower common in Equestria and a couple bordering countries. “It’s also my first name.”

“It’s a bit too... I don’t know, bright for that. Saturated.”

“Yeah, it’s the lighting.” Twilight broke his left foreleg, then he fell trying to touch it. “What the hell was that?”

“Why aren’t you screaming?” Twilight said. “That’s what most ponies do. Yeah, I broke your leg.”

“Why?”

“Well, with no sex for reasons I can’t go into, we have to film a lot of violence to make up for it.”

“Like none of you are attracted to each other?”

“Sort of. I mean... yeah, look, it’s complicated. But that’s definitely a reason. Obviously.”

“Can you fix me?”

“I think I’ll leave you there. So we fulfilled our contracts, what are we doing now?”

It took a moment for someone to answer. “Going home,” Rainbow said.

“Where’s ‘home’ for you? A cloud? With me? With that dirty, uneducated country pony who kicks trees for a living?”

“A cloud.”

“Well, I’m going to track you and teleport to any clouds you land on.”

“We’ll see.” She took off and Twilight ran after her.

“Well, that’s mah plan gone,” Applejack said. “So see you next week or somethin’.”

“Yep....” Next Chapter: Chapter 46: A Pinch of Appledash Estimated time remaining: 15 Hours, 5 Minutes