Spike, from the top of the stairs, flicks the light switch several times. “Aw, come on! I’m the one who has to replace the fuses every time this happens, Twilight!”

Well, at least it doesn’t seem like an emergency situation, and nothing feels different to me. I Spark up, literally shedding light on the situation with a small ball of bright, blue flame in my translucent fist. Twilight’s sitting in a pile of her notecards, rubbing her head next to her horn, which is now shedding dull purple-blue sparks. Looking around, I can’t find Pinkie. Turning towards the containment cylinder she went towards I see...

Oh no! she’s been mutated into a giant pile jumbled bare flesh and pink fuzz!

Wait, no, she’s just turned into a human. At least it isn’t anything dangerous, and she didn’t end up inside out anything like that. I don’t think Spike could’ve dealt wi-

click

“Holy mother of Nayru!!”

Pinkie sits up in the tank, rubbing the side of her muzzle-less face with one hand, distractingly bare of clothes. With a moment of confusion, she looks down at her new appendage. “Wow! my hoof looks just like a hand!” She looks down. “Oooo! What’re these?”

Her hands go to play with... uh, I can’t really think right now, but what she’s doing is highly distracting and in no way something such a nice looking young lady should be doing. And she’s giggling, her voice almost perfectly identical.

“Uh... Twilight? I think you goofed...”

Twilight cracks her eyes open, looking from me to Pinkie. “Uh oh, that wasn’t part of the experiment!”

“Woah, there’s a Pinkie-colored Anthony down here!” Spike was standing at the bottom of the stairs looking at Pinkie. Well, more like ogling Pinkie, something I could not bring myself to blame him for, as embarrassing as it was likely to be for the both of us later.

“Hey, uh... I think I might need a cold shower, later.”

“Why? I thought you hated cold showers?” Pinkie looked at me curiously.

“I’ll need a cold shower...” I emphasize every word, but decide not to explain, or things could get even more awkward a lot quicker.

Pinkie stood up, flailing her arms for balance and finally leaning against the glass in a way that mooshed her... frontal assets in a way that unintentionally - I hope - was giving me a painfully uncomfortable reaction. I hadn’t seen another human in more than eighteen months now, and my hormones were telling me that this meant the human race is in dire risk of extinction and I should do everything to rectify that as soon as possible.

Hormones don’t play fair, especially when she gets the hang of standing on her own, and jumps up and down a few times in delight. God, she’s still got such energy.

I feel a tic begin to form in my facial muscles, making my eyelids twitch slightly. I think I need to murder Cadence and Twilight Sparkle. It will leave the world a safer place from mishap.

“Uh, Pinkie, I think we should get you some clothes. Fast.”

“But why? I’m not cold yet!” Your nipples disagree. No! Bad me! I mentally slap myself for the thought.

“I mean for the other reason we wear clothes... Please.”

“Huh? But I don’t have anything dangling, unless you mean these!” She immediately grabbed her... self for emphasis. Oh god, I think I need to escape this room before I do something stupid and irreversible.

“Yes! I mean those!” I rush up the stairs and out of the library as fast as I could. Hoooooo boy, why’d she have to end up so hot? No! Bad! Bad thought! I rushed towards the only pony I thought could help now: Rarity. I just hope she can make something that doesn’t make the whole situation even worse.

“... and so that’s what happened. I’m, ah, having some biological reactions to Pinkie’s form, but I don’t want to do something like that with her! She’s my friend, and I’m sure it’s just physical, not a real attraction.”

Rarity nods in understanding. “Alright, dear, I think I can help you out with this. I’ll take some of my fabric and go make something for Pinkie. I do hope the darling is keeping to the basement, she might cause some... problematic rumors if she went around town.” The white mare stood and began moving towards the upstairs area I assume is her workshop.

A few minutes later, she comes back down, gently levitating a large, full-looking suitcase. “This is my travelling case, and it now holds what I need. Now, come along, I’ll need your opinion on the results.”

I pray that whatever my opinion is, it’s at least publicly acceptable. Pinkie might end up being a rather large problem... or two. No! Damnit brain! Don’t give in to the hormones!

We get back to the library, and, against my better judgement, follow Rarity into the basement. I just have to remember, Pinkie is a pony. Just a pony. This is all temporary.

The white mare pulls out a small, framed piece of paper, and I have to wonder what she’s going to- I let my thought trail off as she whispers something to it, and it begins to expand, turning into a three-part paper screen. Huh.

After it’s set in the way to prevent Pinkie from... ‘distracting’ me, Rarity goes to work, a flurry of whites, pinks, and yellows, the swirl of cloth, sewing needles, thread, and magic a stunning display unmatched even by Twilight’s supposed magical mastery. After several moments, I notice that Spike is ogling Rarity with his pupils literally turning to heart-shapes, as he stared with unmatched adoration. Yyyyep, crushing real hard.

Finally, Rarity is done, And she whisks the now-collapsing screen away with a dramatic, ‘Voila!’.

Behind where it had been standing is still Pinkie, but now bouncing slightly on her heels and humming softly. Her frizzy, poofy mane of hair is now cascading over a white stop with a large, pink heart in the center of the... chest. Pinkie was also wearing a skirt and long, white stockings.

And now, her proportions were more... accentuated. I must admit, I’m not as much of a breasts man, but all her curves stood out. Oh, goddamnit, I can’t escape my own thoughts! But, in truth, she was beautifully dressed, and smiling happily.

"Rarity! That’s exactly what I wa- er, we didn’t want!!”

Rarity snorted. “Well, I think it’s smashing. And besides, Pinkie loves it, don’t you?”

Pinkie smiled and bounced again, cheerily chirping out, “Yepper-doodley snickerdoodles!”

... And now my stomach has joined the revolt against my brain. Traitor.

“Rarity... ugh, well, I guess you are just doing what you do best...” I think on what to do, making sure I’m looking in the exact opposite direction from Pinkie Pie.

Not able to come up with anything, I try to think harder, but my thoughts are interrupted by a starry hand, looking like a pool of the night sky, phases through my chest. “Yoo-hoo! Anthony, take a look at what I can do!”

Spinning around in sudden terror for my life, I see that Pinkie is just a black outline, defined by a series of tiny pinpoints within the shape, and a massive, pale-blue star burning in her chest. A pair of swirling blue galaxies defined her eyes.

And, while her appearance should’ve set off every instance of my fight-or-flight instinct... instead I found myself relaxing. Pinkie, floating several feet off the ground, was spinning and flying with loud giggles and gales of laughter, and it was hard not to join in. She just looked so happy.

Except, I can’t fly... “Pinkie, how are you doing that?”

<I JUST FEEL SO LIGHT AND HAPPY, AND I CAN’T HELP BUT FLY!> She spun around in a joyous loop, before hovering in front of me and extending a hand. <COME ON! FLYING IS GREAT! I CAN SEE WHY RAINBOW DASH ALWAYS DOES IT WHENEVER SHE CAN!>

Nervously, I take her hand, my mind a bit too clouded to think of any other action. As her fingers slip between mine, I feel a pleasant tingle and a load of warmth, and my own Spark flares brighter, converting my own Star Form into one like hers, but with a much smaller, normal, white star in my own chest. Slowly, I begin to rise from the floor, the odd feeling of weightlessness suffusing my body, like it was when I was in the vacuumed-out chamber.

“Pinkie... I’m not sure you should be doing anything like this unless you know what you’re doing...” I think back to what Lyra said, about my powers possibly killing me, and Pinkie is even more powerful! I can feel the energy she’s radiating dwarf mine. Yet, it’s strangely pleasant, like a faceful of warm sunshine after a cold wind.

<DON’T WORRY, WE KNOW WHAT WE'RE DOING!>

“We!?”

Almost without warning, I feel Pinkie pull me effortlessly through the wall and into the earth beneath the tree, zipping through the solid matter like it’s nothing. Another star, blazing a blue even brighter than Pinkie’s core, but held in a cage of golden filigree, orbited Pinkie’s core like a joyous little friend, a smaller star still orbiting as well, shimmering green with tiny specks of purple floating ahead of it like eyes.

The blue-and-gold star ‘stopped’ to hover in front of me. <I’M HERE, TOO, AND I WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND TOO! FRIENDS ARE ALWAYS GREAT TO HAVE!> The star broke off with a giggle, stopping to push back a tendril of brilliant blue fire that had started to extend from Pinkie’s core, keeping it from separating into the earth all around.

“Ooooooh man. I feel nice and all right now, but I’m freaking out over here!”

With a sudden shift, we’re going up, and I have no idea how fast. Suddenly, we’re bursting from the top of a snow-capped mountain higher than any nearby peak. Pinkie sets us both down on the top of the peak, the gentle aura of weightlessness keeping me from feeling like I’m going to fall.

Far, far below, I see Canterlot, hanging from the side of the mountain below. We just traveled a lateral sixty-plus miles, and then up nearly another two, if Twilight’s geography books are right, in the span of a conversation. Three sentences, really.

“P- Pinkie... I know you’re having fun and all, but I’m really not sure if you should be just playing around with stellar energy like this, it’s dangerous! Don’t you remember how I got this cast!?”

The little blue star came out again, as Pinkie’s Star Form faded. “Don’t worry. I’ve got a friend to help with that!” the little star bobs happily, zooming over to ‘nuzzle’ me on the cheek, feeling more fuzzy than giant-ball-of-incandescent-gas-ey. In spite of the both of us powering down, she’s still so warm, and she hugs me as we sit on this forsaken and private mountaintop.

“Listen Pinkie, I like this a lot and all, but if you turn into a pony and lose your powers, we’re gonna be stuck up here... Couldn’t we move a little closer to Ponyville, somewhere quiet and private?” As soon as the words leave my mouth I want to beat the shit out of my brain, I meant private for Pinkie being human, not... damnit, Cadence!

Pinkie giggles, rocking back and forth slightly. “Silly, Twily-wily said it’d take around four hours! I feel like I could break it sooner, but... I want to spend some time with you. And with all the stuff we’ve been doing today, and how high up we are, the stars will be out soon!” She turned an honest, happy grin on me, and I practically felt myself melt. Traitors. All my body is traitors!

“Pinkie, the stars come out every night, we don’t have... to... oh, fine.” I give up. Arguing with her that is. I am not going to screw this pony-turned-human!

An insidious little voice whispered in the back of my mind. Who said you had to? A kiss is just as pleasant and very nice...

The worst part was that I couldn’t get the thought out of my head.

The two of us leaned towards each other as the edge of the horizon began to darken, the change from night sudden as the moon rose, bringing a tide of night across the sky in its wake, the sun setting at its own pace on the other side of sky, like a tired worker sinking slowly into soft sheets at the end of a long day.

The stars, though... from up here, they look like tiny birds, or butterflies, flying a long way off. I could see totally new constellations and stars, including one that... that looked like an enormous harp, or maybe just a miles-wide grin in the sky...

And so we watched the stars for an hour, dozens, then hundreds, then thousands coming into easy view from the not-so-lonely mountaintop. Several of them seemed to be clustered around the moon, as if following the pale orb through the night. Others seemed to be moving in the other direction.

It was like they weren’t static objects, but glimmering fish in a perfectly clear ocean, swimming with the currents...

I blinked, and realized that Pinkie was curled up on my arm, snuggled into my side and watching the stars, and that we had, at some point, begun laying down next to each other. All the shadows of her face were like reflections of the sky above, pools of vision into the night sky all around. It was strangely attractive.

I let out a sigh, but a happy one. “Pinkie. Nobody will ever know of this, and when you go back to being a pony, it will end there.” With that, I give her a kiss. It’s not at all like with Twilight/Chrysalis, Pinkie’s temporarily human mouth feeling much more comfortable and it just feels good. I just feel good all over...

Pinkie smiles, bright as the stars shimmering in the pooled shadows of her face. “That’s okay. I’m fine with being friends, if that’s what makes you happy, Anthony.” She rolls over, softly, and I can feel her turning back to her Star Form, for the trip back.

<LET’S GO HOME, ANTHONY. I HAVE SOME PRANKS I WANT TO TRY ON RAINBOW DASH WHILE I CAN FLY AND GO THROUGH WALLS AT SUPER-SPEED!>

Laughing, I take her hand again, and we fly, invisibly, through the fabric of the night.

Chapter 50 Special Extra

Pinkie and I are walking along, and after a few moments, we stop, and Pinkie looks up. “Wow! Fifty Chapters! That’s awesome!”  She walks over to a button and presses it. “Holey moley! Eighty-three favorites and Eighty-four likes! That’s incredible. I can’t believe it only took...” She thinks for a minute. “Eleven days!?”

“Yeah, that’s a lot. Hey, wait... apparently, nine people think this stuff sucks worse than that Daring Do garbage! This is bullshit!”

“Aw, they’re just mad they can’t do better.”

“Yeah. Heh, this has been quite a wild ride just to get here, huh?”

“Oh yeah! The craziest! But it’s nowhere near over yet!”

I turn to face The Audience. “Yep, this isn’t over by a long shot. But first, a few clarifications.” I clear my throat. “When I said that ‘Once Pinkie returns to a pony, it’s over’ I meant it-”

[Woah, wait a minute there, the shippers might leave!]

“Oh, come on, man! It’s not my fault they have to use other people’s works to get their rocks off!”

[No, but you’re encouraging them! And besides, there’s always the chance Twilight could do that again, but on purpose! C’mon, shippers, bring your friends!]

“Fine, but this isn’t going to become a bloody clopfic, even if the author’s a clopper, doesn’t mean I’m gonna get dirty with any ponies! That means I am never, I repeat never going to have sex with this.” I pick up Pinkie as a demonstration. “Nor this.” I reach to the right and pull Twilight in from the left.

“Wait, how did I get-”

Pinkie giggled, as I cut off the purple pony. “And definitely, definitely not this.” I pull Luna down from above me. “I mean really, I don’t know how these people get it into their heads that you and I would even consider it.”

Luna straightened up. “Well, you are a creature of stellar power, which means you are under my domain.”

“You’re not my mother!”

About this time, Rarity steps into view. “Oh, are we having a party on the fourth wall, dears? Ooh, do any of you readers have anything to tell me? I promise I won’t abuse the knowledge too bad!” She giggled coyly, smiling at The Audience.

[Don’t do it folks, it’s not worth it. Back me up on this, Anthony.]

“Only if I get some ice cream.”

[Uh, I only have mint-spaghetti-uncooked eggs flavored, left over from when Discord rained ice cream out of the computer monitors.]

Twilight looked around, trying to identify the source of the voice. “Wait, Discord? but he’s been imprisoned for-”

I pat Twilight on the head. “Don’t worry your tiny little head about it, this part is non-canon, so it doesn’t matter.”

Luna stands up. “Well, I’m going off to play at the arcade again. I hear they installed a new Pac-Mane machine.”

I groaned at the pun. “Seriously, you ponies are awful.”

Fluttershy whimpered from my feet; how she got there I have no idea, but it made me sad to see her look so shocked and hurt. “I meant your puns are awful.”

Fluttershy sniffed. “B- but I came up with ‘pac-mane’ as a name... I thought it was witty...”

[Oh crap, you made Fluttershy sad!]

“Oh screw it, I’ve had enough, I’m ending this now.”

[Wait! We haven’t announced the next arc yet!]

“They can wait a few days!” I reach up and hit the floppy icon to save the document and then punch the ‘X’ bu

Next Chapter: Chapter 51 Estimated time remaining: 28 Hours, 17 Minutes