Applejack woke up feeling miserable. She knew what this feeling meant.

Zombie Diamond Dog Communists. Her blood boiling, Applejack summoned the Boomstick Boomstick. It shot the co-host of Deathbattle in groups of three, and they were on fire. The very shotgun she wielded was so hot that her barn caught on fire, despite her being in space.

She shot through space on a raft, made of the corpses of apple demons, huge, fruity demons who plague doctors with their healthy benefits. When she landed, she cocked her shotgun, in preparation for the onslaught of Zombie Diamond Dog Communists.They came, shambling in their pack, dully muttering about the proletariat. With a frown, Applejack shot the Boomstick Boomstick, and the bullets shot out of the triple barrels, impacting with the hoard and destroying them. A couple more managed to escape.

Applejack's hind hooves became covered in an aura of holy fuckfire at a simple thought. Squinting, she could see their entire genetic lineage back to the days of the first protozoa. With a roar, she bucked the fuck out of the lead zombie, the holy fuckfire burning a hole in the very fabric of Ponyville. The remaining Zombie Diamond Dog Communists were dragged into the bowels of hell, where they are forced to be captains of industry to this day.

Not satisfied with this, Applejack took her hat off. Admittedly, it wasn't really a hat, as its fabric was made of lava, and on its insides a gargantuan war for the right to stay alive was continuously fought, but it was still wearing a hat.

"Lands sakes, could I use a drink." From the same dimension where she had imprisoned genocidal Teletubbies, she pulled her cider barrel from it. It was so huge, it had to fall from the sky, blotting out Celestia's sun and crushing Ponyville beneath its girth. Pulling the barrel towards herself, she took a long drink from it. The cider was made from the juices of appledemons, and the cider itself sang the song to end the world in a thousand, terrified voices only Applejack could hear. Applejack paid them no mind.