"So, all those times that you guys were just staring at each other without saying anything, you were using this magic mind-reading thing on each other?"

"I mean, I wouldn't call it 'mind reading', but yeah, that about covers it."

"Dude! You coulda told me!"

"You never asked."

Gilda gave me a deadpan while I just looked at her with a more than a slightly self-satisfied smile. As I leaned against the table, I could vaguely hear the sound of my soda being slurped up right next to me, as well as the sound of a content hum of appreciation echoing in the back of my head.

Gilda, Halfy, and I had decided to use the past few minutes to clarify a few things while we waited for our food. And by that, I mean that Gilda had decided to add two and two together about more than a few things that had happened in the past. Suffice to say, she wasn't exactly happy about the idea of me having 'secret' conversations - though I didn't really look at the whole thing like that, since that made it sound much more sinister and malicious than it had actually been - without her knowledge.

Halfy, however, had been content to sit there and sip on her water. She didn't seem to hold any of the dramatics that Gilda did. If anything, she was just happy to be included now.

"I-I don't know, maybe they had their reasons. I mean, they still don't have a lot of their magic back so..." She trailed off, leaving the sentence in the air for anyone to finish. Gilda glanced over at her for a moment, a wry expression on her beak, before she just shook her head and moved a taloned hand through some of the feathers along her head.

"Ugh. Seriously dude, what the hay..." She glanced at her empty mug of cider, pouting as though it would magically refill if it saw her upset enough. When that didn't work, she looked back at me. "How am I supposed to keep my cred as the coolest griffon in all of Equestria when you get all 'secret agent cool guy' on me?" I didn't bother to hold back the chuckle that formed at the statement. The fact that Gilda wasn't really angry at me so much as she was upset by the sudden disproportionate growth of my 'coolness levels' was absolutely classic when it came to her.

"I'm not a griffon, so I'd say your throne is still safe there for a while longer." Gilda rolled her eyes at this, choosing instead to dispassionately lean her elbow against the table before using her hand to support the weight of her head.

"Not if bug-breath decides to turn you into a griffon next time..." She mumbled. She sounded like a kid having a tantrum over the fact that one of the other kids at the daycare got more birthday cake than they had.

I'd be lying if I said a part of me didn't find the idea of her being at least a little humbled by this whole thing at least a little satisfying. I mean, I'd have preferred it if it wasn't based around a series of events that I would hardly call ideal, but hey. I could work with what I got.

Halfy looked to Gilda with a sympathetic, albeit amused, smile.

"Hey, you're still p-plenty cool. It's not like lots of other ponies can say that they outran an Ursa Major before." She offered. She reached a hoof over towards the griffon. For a second, I could notice a brief battle going on in her head as her face hardened a bit. Her eyes darted back and forth, likely as she tried to figure out whether what she was trying to do would be considered overreaching or not before she eventually seemed to make a decision and pat Gilda lightly on her shoulder.

Well, really, it was less like a pat and more like a graze as Halfy still second-guessed herself halfway through the process. It was all of a second before Gilda gave out a snicker as she looked over the still nervous but clearly trying mare. A wing of hers reached out, practically engulfing the mare before dragging both her and the stool she sat upon closer to her side. Halfy gave out a gasp of surprise at this as she struggled to keep the glass of water between her hooves from spilling as a result of the sudden jostling she had just received.

"Ursa Minor, actually," Gilda corrected, reaching an arm out and over the shoulders of Halfy before bringing her close like one would a close chum, "but you got a point. I'm still way too awesome for there to be any competition between the big guy and I."

Halfy seemed beside herself at the gestures, not really knowing how to respond to the sudden displays of affection. Still, the meek smile that appeared on her face as well as the look in her eyes showed that she was actually more than a little happy about the whole thing.

The whole scene was heartwarming, to say the least. Hell, I was barely able to keep myself from actively giving out an 'awwww' as I saw how well both my older and newer friends seemed to be getting along with each other.

It's odd. I never would have expected Gilda to have gotten so chummy with someone who was so shy. In the past, we had talked about lots of things, including some less than pleasant experiences we had had throughout our lives. One of those experiences Gilda had brought up involved a series of... let's say 'incidents'.

*********************

The human that sat under the shade of the stray tree near the edge of the Everfree forest was a little less than pleased at the moment. First, he had woken up with a terrible headache after a rough night of sleep at his Zebra friend's home. Then, he had to take a less than pleasant detour around the usual path out of the Everfree he had taken due to an entire portion of the forest being unofficially marked as 'off-limits' by Zecora. More off limits than a forest of perpetual danger such as this one usually was, that is.

As to why Zecora had deemed it as off-limits, Jeremy would quickly be informed of a genuine issue called 'Hydra Mating Season'.

As if that wasn't irritating enough for the human - who at this point could still swear that he had thistles and stray twigs hidden all over his body from the alternate route he had taken - he had been tackled to the ground for what must have been the third time that week by a new friend he had made in the shape of a griffon he had gotten out of a less than ideal situation a few days ago. And now, to top it all off, said griffon had used the opportunity to use Jeremy as a sort of audio diary/therapist of sorts, talking to him about everything that had happened to her the last time she had been in Ponyville.

A part of Jeremy was very much regretting asking why she always insisted on tackling him before he had reached the town where he might have the chance to hide, seeing as that had brought this whole spiel about in the first place. Another part of him, though, was much more occupied just mentally keeping track of all the apparent... he would call them 'incidents', that his new friend had brought about in the past.

"So then, I was like 'well, when you decide not to be lame anymore, gimme a call', and I beat it the hay outta there before I could catch any of their stinks on me." The griffon quoted, recalling the story of her first visit to Ponyville. Jeremy was just staring at the griffon evenly, rubbing his fingers against his temples in an attempt to combat the headache that had continued to plague him throughout the day. Gilda seemed to take notice of this, an annoyed scowl working its way onto her features.

"Yo, are you even listening, J?"

Jeremy just gave a simple nod, unable to summon the effort to give a more direct response as he gathered himself. He knew he had a pension for being rather blunt whenever he was dealing with a migraine or headache of any sort. It was a bad habit that he had dealt with ever since he could remember. Fortunately, he had usually been able to avoid being around others up until now to keep them from finding out just how bad it would get. Unfortunately for him, Gilda actively sought him out, so the avoidance strategy had gone clear out the window. Still, he tried desperately to make the best of a bad situation.

"... I really don't know what it is you want me to add on here." He eventually settled on, giving out a slow and deliberate breath through his nostrils.

Gilda, evidently, was not quite satisfied with this.

"Uh, I dunno, maybe, anything? Here I am pourin my guts out to ya, talking about how I lost my best friend to a bunch of losers for no reason, and you're just here starin at me like some rando on the streets!" Jeremy blinked at this, a particularly bad throb of his headache being made just slightly worse by Gilda's raised voice.

"Gilda, as much as I appreciate you using me as the metaphorical toilet for your emotional upchuck, I already told you, today is not the day. I really don't want to say anything I might regret, so is there any chance we can just try this again later when I don't-" Jeremy's hopeful, albeit somewhat irked plea fell on deaf ears as he was quickly interrupted.

"No way. You're totally on their side, ain't ya?"

"That's not even close to what I-"

"You totally are! Ugh, and here I thought I finally met someone else who got what it meant to be cool. Instead, I just get some other, weirder-looking dork who lives with some striped dweeb pony!" Jeremy blinked, giving Gilda an emotionless stare before he took in another deep breath. A small part of him still fought against what he was about to do, but a much, much larger part of him was in the mood to provide his honest commentary about this whole thing.

The human sat themself up against the tree, straightening their back out before putting both of the palms of their hands together just inches from their face.

He and Gilda shared a moment of silence - the griffon raising a brow at the lanky creature before her - before Jeremy gave out a silent nod of self-affirmation.

"... So, to summarize," he pointed the tips of his joined hands to the griffon, "you made an old lady believe that she was being attacked by a snake."

"Hey, a bit of a scare never hurt any-"

"Then proceeded to steal from her." He rose his voice by just a tad. Loud enough that he could overpower her voice while still quiet enough that it wouldn't strain his own.

"Look, it was just one flippin' apple-"

"You yell at and make a pony cry for getting in your way while helping baby. Ducks. Cross the street." He made sure to punctuate his words carefully, narrowing his eyes ever so slightly as he did.

"Oh c'mon! How was I supposed to know that she was such a cry-"

"And" he yet again interrupted, "to top it all off, you try to isolate and manipulate the one friend that you had in that town while jumping at ghosts because you were jealous of-"

"Aw hay no, I was not-"

"JEALOUS. OF." He once more interrupted firmly and squarely, "-another friend that your first friend had made for spending more time around her than you. That sound about right? Cuz I really think I nailed it."

Gilda had a mixture of both absolute shock and pure fury on her face. Evidently, having her actions repeated and simplified to her in such a manner was more than a little frustrating for the wren.

"All right, fine! I get it! You're just another-"

"Lemme guess, 'lame-o'?" Jeremy mocked, crossing his legs and leaning forward as he said so with a wry smile.

Gilda's feathers ruffled as she took in a deep breath, voicing her frustrations in the only way she knew how. She yelled at the absolute top of her lungs.

"WOULD YOU QUIT DOING THAT?!" Jeremy covered his ears at the noise. He could swear he felt his eardrums momentarily transform into 'ear-percussion orchestras'. This only served to worsen his headache which, of course, just as quickly worsened his mood.

"Depends. Can you get some new material?" He shot back. "Or are we just going to stick to the insults that you picked up from a middle school sitcom? They were pretty popular where I came from. 30 years ago."

The griffon's frustration welled further and further as she now actively glared at the human before her. Her legs carried her before her mind could issue the order, closing the distance between them step by step until they were literally butting heads.

Jeremy, however, did not back down, making use of his old habit of being as stubborn as a bull to face this feathered matador of sorts directly.

"What is with you? You're the one who wanted to keep talking to the awesomest griffon in Equestria. You're the one who decided to talk to me that day. Not the other way around. I don't need to be here. I can be anywhere in the bucking world that I want!" By now she was practically panting, her anger squeezing at her chest like a vice of heated spikes and invisible strings.

"Oh really, then why? The fuck?" Jeremy leaned forward against the griffon's head. He didn't gain any ground whatsoever in their confrontation, the griffon easily being just as strong if not far stronger than the fairly average human. "Are you here in the first place?"

The griffon opened her beak to say something. Anything. An insult. A cool dismissal. So much a simple scoff so that she could turn around, fly off, and never come back with the feeling that she had gotten the last words. But she couldn't. Instead, the beginning motions of speech adorned her beak, never getting past the first steps, as she and Jeremy continued to look and push at one another's faces directly.

"Well, chicken-head?"

And with the challenge issued, Gilda spoke the first, most visceral selection of words that came to mind.

"BECAUSE I REGRET IT, OKAY?! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR? I BUCKING REGRET IT. I REGRET EVERY SECOND OF WHAT I DID, AND I HATE MYSELF FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO BIRD THE BUCK UP AND JUST SAY 'SORRY' WITHOUT NEEDING TO MAKE IT SOME COMPETITION. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANTED TO HEAR? HUH?!"

"AS A MATTER OF FACT-" Jeremy began to reply, his voice just as raised in volume as the griffons despite the scraping sensation in his throat and burning in his chest. He used to opportunity to raise a hand, moving it up to the distracted griffon's face. He was subtle with his movement, slowly but certainly shifting his palm until only his index finger remained, which he brought directly up until it was on a level with and pointed directly at the Griffon. Then... he pulled his head back from hers and gave her a swift boop on the nose.

"Yes, you dumbass, that's exactly what I wanted to hear." He suddenly said in a quiet and calm, Gilda scrunching her face in confusion from both the sudden shift in the human's tone as well as the odd sensation on her beak.

"Honestly, for someone who says they're so awesome, you absolutely suck at saying what's on your mind." The griffon blinked, her mind blank as she tried desperately to regain traction on the suddenly slippery floor that was her mindscape.

"I-I-... You... What?" She eventually settled on, drawing a smirk from Jeremy.

"Nice, you got one out of three sentences done."

"How did you-"

" 'do that'? Gilda, it wasn't exactly hard to do. You may be an egotistical hardass, but you're plenty better than some others I've known in my life. Plenty easier to read too."

"But, how would you-"

" 'know that you regretted that stuff'? Folks don't exactly try to apologize to the people they've wronged, especially in public, unless they have at least a few regrets."

"BUT WHY-"

"Because," he yet again interrupted for what must have been the umpteenth time, "I think you're a good person. Or pony. Or griffon. Whatever, semantics. I think you learned from everything that happened and wanted to grow a bit. I think you earnestly do want to get better, at least at being a friend." He leaned back against the tree for what felt like the first time in years but had actually just been a matter of minutes.

His head was practically on fire now. Every throb felt like somebody had taken a jackhammer and ground it into the side of his face. He put his fingers against his temples again, hoping above all hopes that someone would just knock him unconscious already so that she could hopefully sleep this off.

"And while I'm certainly no model citizen, I can certainly at least try to be a good friend to you in return."

Gilda blinked, watching the human before her with an incredulous look as she searched for some kind of sign that he was lying. Some kind of sign that said that he was planning something just underneath it all.

However, all she saw was a strange creature with a weird version of their language and an annoying voice... that did in fact want to help her be a better friend.

"... You're the weirdest, coolest, lamest freak I have ever met," Gilda said simply, watching as Jeremy simply shrugged in return.

"Any chance the title comes with an ice pack and some aspirin as a trophy?"

*********************

I gave out a chuckle as I thought back to this. In a weird way, I guess that had been where I had gotten my start at looking a little more deeply into the habits of others. If I hadn't gone out of my way to help Gilda to get better with how she went about interacting with others, I would probably have had a decent amount of trouble getting along with Nightmare Moon or Chrysalis. And evidently, Gilda had taken a lot more from our talks since back then than I had thought, if her current friendly noogie-ing of Halfy was anything to go by. A motion which Halfy returned with a half-hearted struggle and some cheerful laughter.

I moved the Dr. Hay-Per next to me closer while I watched, absent-mindedly taking a sip from the straw of the familiar yet still entirely copyright-safe beverage.

"Our soda..." A childishly sad and mournful voice suddenly popped into my head. I blinked as I recognized Nightmare Moon, glancing to my right and momentarily seeing a vision of the alicorn with her cheeks puffed out and a pout on her face.

I was so distracted by my thoughts that I had completely forgotten about the fact that the soda was for her. Glancing down at said soda, I could clearly see that I had sipped up the last of it.

I gave out a sheepish chuckle as I noticed both Gilda and Halfy looked at me with two similarly amused expressions. They had probably heard Nightmare Moon's sad whining, which had also drawn their attention to me.

"Sorry about that," I apologized aloud, partially to Nightmare Moon as well as partially to Halfy and Gilda for interrupting their moment, "guess my mind kinda wandered somewhere else."

I made a quick assurance to Nightmare Moon that I'd ask for a refill on the soda, which seemed to lessen some of her sadness by at least a little bit. I also made sure to try not to think that I had basically just shared an indirect kiss with Nightmare Moon, seeing as she was the one sipping from that straw not long ago.

Course, it was a little bit tougher to explain away the fact that my heart beat a good bit faster and why my face turned a different shade of red when I thought about this, but I decided to put a lot more focus on the suddenly very real question that was 'where is our waitress when you need her'.

As the old phrase went though, 'speak of the devil' and all that jazz. I could practically feel myself give a silent prayer of thanks to whatever version of a god had decided to humor me at this moment as I saw the waitress make her way over once again. She had a pair of food-filled plates balanced carefully on her back, though she was still able to walk her way over towards us with seemingly no issue.

Another pony accompanied her, this one a unicorn stallion, as they held both a sizeable plate of my beloved cheese fries and a metal jug that I could only assume was used to refill glasses of water. I could feel my mind go blank as the familiar scent of dairy-based milk proteins coating the surface of grease-fried potato slices reached my nostrils. I had to stop myself from letting out a shudder as I recalled the various late nights I had spent just diving into the cheddary goodness that was slowly but surely approaching me, like an old lover come back for one last fling.

I'd say I'm being overdramatic, but I'd be wrong and I would make myself feel bad if I did.

I'll... have to go back to that diner later. Once this is all over, of course.

"Alright! I have a Carrot Apple Ginger Soup, some Cripsy Cheddar Fish Sticks, and our house specialty Cheese Fries!" The mare chirped, looking between the three of us as she spoke with her trademark smile.

"Yup, that us."

"I-I ordered the soup, yes."

"Oh fuck yes. Thank you, those are ours!"

We each provided our own forms of thankful confirmation as the unicorn and the pegasus went about providing us with our dishes. They made sure that the meals were placed directly in front of their respective orderers.

Halfy seemed quite content with the soup that was placed before her, taking the spoon offered by the unicorn's magic with thanks as she started to give the piping hot broth a gentle stir. Gilda had a couple of fish sticks in her mouth so quickly that I had the vaguest concern that she would bite into the wing of the pegasus who was offering it to her. The pegasus seemed unphased though.

Finally, my beautiful mountains salted starch with layers of yellow melted upon them like sheets of wondrous snow were served in the magic of the unicorn that accompanied the waitress. It took all of my willpower to keep myself from diving headfirst into the dish.

For a moment, I could swear that I saw Nightmare Moon pressed directly against the side of my head once again, a look of child-like wonder sparkling in her eyes as she gazed at the meal before us.

"What is this... wondrous odor that doth invades our muzzle."

I could vaguely hear the sound of another mare's giggle enter the confines of my mind as I glanced up and saw Halfy looking toward me.

"I guess the princess has never had Prench Fries before?" She asked, to which I just blinked for a moment.

I had forgotten that there was a pony equivalent of France here way too often. So it always threw me off guard whenever someone dared to mispronounce the name of my favorite transportation devices for cheese, up until I remembered that they really did have such a term as 'prench' in the first place.

It also turned out that ponies had a weird, hay-based alternative to these called 'Hay Fries', which sounds about as appetizing to me as your average can of mosquito repellent did a mosquito. Turns out, a lot of ponies prefer the taste of Hay Fries over that of Prench Fries, so there was a bitter rivalry between the two factions of 'potato vs hay'.

But who am I to say? It's not like I had a side in this supposed war against the filthy hay-preferred fools that probably didn't even bother using ketchup or adding salt onto their inferior version of fries. Nope. No side at all!

" 'Prench Fries'..." I heard Nightmare Moon repeat, trying out the word in her voice just like she had soda and pop. "And they hold a layer of cheese atop them, as well. What an interesting decadence! Sir Jeremy, kindly provide us with one of these 'Fries of Cheese'!"

I smirked at her forced annunciation of cheese fries, shaking my head slightly as I chanced a glance back to the two servers that stood next to us. The unicorn was busying himself refilling Halfy's glass of water while the mare had been assuring Gilda - who had several fish sticks hanging from her beak at the time - that she would come by with refills for our cider and soda soon.

"Calm down, you big baby. I'll give you some of them once the waiters leave. We don't want ponies seeing the food disappear next to me, do we?" I assured her. I chortled as I felt a vague sensation of impatience and dissatisfaction that I could only guess belonged to Nightmare Moon.

"I hope you all enjoy your meals! 'Don't Dilly Dally now'!"

Oh god, I had forgotten about that corny slogan that all the service staff had to give whenever they served someone their meals. To this day, I don't know if Dilly Dally actually is a pony or just a brand name. I wouldn't be surprised if it was both. Either way, this seemed to garner both a little smile from Halfy as well as a roll of the eyes from Gilda as the waitress cheerfully gave the diner's catchphrase.

I gave the waitress a nod in thanks before using the chance to reach down, grab a fry, and bite into the delectable taste of heaven that sat before me. I could swear that I felt tears well up as I ate one. I could also swear that I heard Nightmare Moon give out a whimper for the same reason.

I was almost so distracted by the fry that I almost didn't notice the unicorn seem to trip over himself, the magic hold he had on the jug of water next to him flickering for a moment as it floated nearby me. I felt my eyes widen as I watched the jug slowly tip mid-air towards me. Before I could react though, I once more heard a familiar voice pop up in the back of my head.

"Nay! Our cheese fries!"

The visage of Nightmare Moon momentarily filled my gaze as I suddenly lost control of all of my limbs. By the time I realized what was happening, I was holding onto the jug in the air to keep it from spilling.

"Oh, horseapples, I am so sorry, sir." I could hear the unicorn apologize, quickly grabbing the jug of water into his magic again.

I blinked. I was kinda in a state of momentary shock as I tried to go over whatever the hell had just happened. I was able to eventually piece together that Nightmare Moon had more or less controlled my body again for a moment or two when she noticed what was going on, but it was rather difficult to do so when it felt like my brain was just rapidly shot between two different places.

"Uh, it's... no problem? I'm alright, so no harm done." I eventually managed to return. I glanced around, still trying to regain my bearings, and noticed that Gilda, Halfy, and the waitress were suddenly entirely focused on the stallion and I. The waitress had lost her trademark smile, replacing it instead with a look of genuine concern.

"Oh, Celestia! Are you two alright?" The mare asked. Gilda tried to say something too, though much more aggressively. Unfortunately for her, there were way too many fish sticks in her beak for me to even come close to understanding that as anything but a muffled mess.

"Yes, yes, I'm okay. So sorry again, sir!" I waved my arms side to side, gesturing to the stallion that everything was okay as he continued to apologize.

"Really, it's fine! You don't have to worry so much! I'm okay."

"But he almost ruined our cheese fries..."

Nightmare Moon tickling the back of my head with her newfound obsession with cheese fries was really not helping the situation. Also, I couldn't help but notice that she was seeming a lot more concerned about the cheese fries than she was me...

Oh who am I kidding, I would have had the same priorities.

"Pardon him, guys. Poor stallion just hasn't been getting a lot of sleep lately." The mare once more chimed in, making her way over to the unicorn and giving him a sympathetic pat on the back.

"O-oh. Have you been stressed recently? Some i-insomnia?" Halfy asked in her own bid to sympathize with the stallion. The unicorn, in return, just gave out a sigh and shook his head.

"Naw, I wish. I've been having nightmares like mad. Must be going on a week by now." As the stallion spoke, I could once more see Nightmare Moon's form surround me as she seemed to subconsciously lean towards the conversation. Gone was the look of a child throwing tantrums or being amazed by the world around her. Instead, Nightmare Moon's expression held a deadly seriousness to it.

"O-oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Maybe you should try to take a break. You must be exhausted." Halfy suggested, to which the unicorn gave a simple nod.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll just uh... take a second or two." He looked over to the waitress next to him, his ears folding against his head as he offered an apologetic look to the mare. "Sorry about this, Blooming Daze."

The mare simply gave the stallion a smile as she continued to rub a hood over his back reassuringly.

"It's no problem. Go and get some rest. I'll cover for you for a bit." The stallion nodded once more, offering us one last glance before he made his way back into the well-lit diner, the jug of water floating just behind him as he did so. Shortly after the stallion left, the mare once more gave her apologies before assuring us she would be back with our drinks and following shortly after the unicorn.

Gilda chose this time to finally choke down what was in her mouth. An audible gulp escaped her before she let out a breath.

"Yeesh, what the hay was that all about?" She scoffed, leaning against the table over her plate of food as she looked to where the servers had gone.

I shrugged my shoulders in response before shifting in my seat so that I was once more facing the table.

"The guy's working late nights and having a rough time sleeping. Can't say I'm surprised. I've seen plenty of ponies slip up on stuff when they're tired. Lord knows I've made that mistake before too." Several overnight stays in my old office at Hooves N' Elbow Grease made that brutally honest to me. Once more, I felt a voice in the back of my head as I heard Nightmare Moon give out a grumble. All three of us were able to take notice of this rather quickly.

"Somethin' you wanna say there, NM?" Gilda questioned as she reached for another fish stick and tore right into it. Nightmare Moon took her time to answer, seeming to find the words that she needed, before her voice filled our heads yet again.

"Nightmares... By all accounts, our former self should be able to clear such concerns from the hearts of the commoners with ease."

The vague memory of Zecora telling me that Princess Luna supposedly monitored the dreams of others some time ago suddenly popped up for a moment as I reached for another cheese fry.

"Maybe Princess Luna is busy?" Halfy offered, which Nightmare Moon quickly shot down.

" 'Tis unlikely. The act of dream walking takes no more than a few hours for those with ample experience. One can easily dash away the nightmares of thousands in their sleep if they would wish to. And even then, ponies only rarely have nightmares. To hear that one is actively struggling under our former self's watch is... disconcerting. How could one such as ourselves hear such a thing and simply rid ourself of such concern?"

In a way, I could get what she was saying. Hearing that another version of myself was doing my old job poorly definitely would have left a sour taste in my mouth. At the same time, that wasn't really her job anymore. She wasn't Luna. She was her own pony.

So, I decided to distract her from these less-than-cheerful thoughts in the easiest way I could.

I held a cheese fry over my right shoulder.

It was gone in less than a second...

"...Thank you, Sir Jeremy. This will suffice."

"No problem."

-------------------------------------

Even though I only really had about a third of the cheese fries I was served - the rest was practically destroyed by the alicorn literally waiting in my shadows - I could still feel the satisfied smile on my face while I sipped some of the Dr. Hay-Per that the waitress pegasus had kindly refilled for me a few moments ago. On occasion, Nightmare Moon would also share a sip or seven from the glass, but I was honestly way too focused on how effectively I had fulfilled my cheese/starch quota for the month to care.

The other two at the table seemed just as if not more satisfied by the meals they were given as well. Halfy was peacefully sipping from her glass of water with an empty bowl of soup in front of her, a nice little smile on her face. Gilda was more inclined to practically be laying across the table belly-up, rubbing her stomach and giving out a sigh as she gave out a satisfied shudder.

I think that by then it was her third mug of cider. I can't remember exactly, but it certainly still wasn't enough to give her much more than a buzz. Of that I was certain.

"God I needed that," I muttered absentmindedly, getting only a combination of grunts and nods of agreement in return.

"We gotta come back here some other time." Gilda all but proclaimed, only for Nightmare Moon to give a response through our mental link.

"Verily. Such meals of less than nutritious varieties were rarely provided to us in our time as co-ruler of Equestria. We must go about correcting this travesty. Post haste!" I more or less picked up what she was saying, but I figured this would be a good bit of practice for her.

"Ease up on the accent, Nightmare Moon..."

"Nay. We are too stuffed to care." Welp, I had tried.

A hearty guffaw came from Gilda as she heard Nightmare Moon's response. She lifted herself up from the table and barely kept herself from tipping the whole thing over as she let herself stand on the ground.

"Man, I know that feeling." Gilda chuckled before reaching towards there a wing of hers met her body. She gave a quick shiver before she pulled out a handful of bits that she had taken from Chrysalis' recent wages and placed them on the table with a healthy slam. "You dudes go ahead and figure out what the damage is. I'm gonna go take a whizz. I've got a full tank that needs to be emptied. "

I grimaced slightly at her words.

"Too much information there, Gilda."

Gilda gave out a snicker. She waved my words off with a move of her talons, as though shooing away a mosquito, before walking into the diner proper.

I watched her for a few moments. I was half expecting her to slam into the glass door of the restaurant with the self-satisfied swagger she walked with. To my disappointment, she didn't.

"S-so Princess-" Halfy began to say, only to pause as she put a hoof to her mouth as if to stop herself. She glanced around, making sure nobody was listening before her face scrunched ever so slightly in focus.

"So Princess, how do you like modern-day restaurants?" She repeated, this time making sure that the message was only received through our minds. I vaguely heard a giggle echo through my mind as Nightmare Moon made to respond.

" 'Tis not often that we have the opportunity to enjoy such quaint times with others. 'Twas a worthwhile and wondrous experience! More so with such enjoyable company." I gave a nod at this. As nice as the place's cheese fries were - and believe me, they were nice - I can't deny that a nice meal would usually just be a backdrop for spending some time with friends.

The entire experience had been a pleasant change of pace. We talked, we ate, and we told some stories about small things that most people wouldn't find interesting. Mostly Gilda was the one telling the stories, sure, and even then it was usually unintelligible what with the mouthfuls of fish sticks she was practically choking down, but they were stories nonetheless.

Halfy was beside herself with joy at Nightmare Moon's words. So much so that a part of me couldn't help but compare how different she looked now compared to when we first met her. She was so much more exuberant. So much more talkative. Sure, she still preferred the role of the listener as opposed to that of the speaker in a conversation, and she still doubted her words and actions from time to time, but the difference was still there.

Even as I glanced at her previously bruised shoulder, which by now seemed to be gone along with any signs of pain she suffered from it, I noticed that whatever hints of sadness that she may have had after the Ponyville incident had seemed to disappear.

I kind of wished that I had met her sooner and under much better circumstances. Who knows? Maybe we would have been good friends.

Not like I could say she wasn't a good friend as things were now, though. And not just to me. Gilda enjoyed her company, Nightmare Moon enjoyed her company, hell I'm pretty sure even Chrysalis had some kind of soft spot for her at the time. I doubt she'd ever admit it, but I was pretty sure.

I glanced at the small pile of bits that Gilda had placed on the table. I was pretty sure that we weren't likely to stick around for any dessert, so I reached over to start counting them out once we got our bill.

I struggled for a bit. I still wasn't exactly a pro at the whole 'being in the body of a pony' angle, so there was more than a bit of concern I had about falling from the stool as I reached for the bits. It was for that reason that I felt so proud when I was able to grab the bits and drag them to me with no incident. Well, more or less.

I felt one of my ears turn on its own as a bit clattered against the floor behind me. My gaze followed the source and saw the small golden coin roll along the floor away from the table I sat on, eventually hitting a small bump before coming to a halt with a spin.

"I-I'll get it." Halfy offered, giving an amused smile as we both shared a look at the novelty of this odd little inconvenience.

I guess the small things just seem much more grounding when you're constantly dealing with much larger, more severe issues.

I gave Halfy an appreciative nod as I set about counting the bits, my mind wandering as I started to piece together the prices of everything from what I had seen on the menu and my past memories of the place.

One, two, three...

I remembered that the cheese fries were almost always about three bits or so. The only time that would change would be in a situation where there was a holiday or something. Well, really I had only seen them on sale once in the many times I had eaten here, but I'm pretty sure it was for a holiday.

I ignored the sound of hooves as I continued to count out the bits, assuming that they were Halfy's.

four, five, six...

The soup was about two bits. That one always gave me a bit of trouble. Not because of the price, but because the exchange rate of bits to what concept of money I had in my head always seemed a little off. It didn't feel like there was an exact translation of price to anything around Equestria. Sometimes it just felt like a system of 'whatever sounds good'. I know there's a method to the madness, but I just couldn't get it for the life of me. There's a reason I always let Zecora, and nowadays Gilda, be the one to haggle whenever prices weren't set in stone.

A part of me noticed that it sounded like there was more than one set of hooves, but I was too busy with what I was doing to notice.

seven, eight, nine...

The fish sticks were another three bits. Add to that the cider that Gilda had ordered as well as the Dr. Hay-Per for Nightmare Moon and I. I think that totaled out to around two more bits total?

Had I been paying attention, I would have noticed the sudden sensations of wariness and concern that suddenly came from Nightmare Moon, as well as the gasp from Halfy.

ten, eleven, twelve

Tips weren't really common in Equestria. I guess that most service staff members were paid more than their fair share. But, it was good manners from where I can from, so I set aside a couple of bits for the waitress. Her service had been nice enough, she had been attentive, and lord knows anyone that could force a smile to seem as genuine as that one when working in the service industry more than earned some portion of their pay and then some.

It was only once I finished gathering these bits, separating them from the rest of the small pile Gilda had laid out before heading to the bathroom and piling them as neatly as I could with my less than elegant hoof movements, that I heard Halfy speak in the back of my mind.

"C-C-Celestia..."

I rolled my eyes at first, thinking that she had just been using the pony equivalent of 'Jesus Christ' when she realized how far the coin had rolled. That was another odd comparison, honestly. Nobody had ever asked me about it when I just said 'god' or 'christ' in passing, so it seemed obvious that they got my meaning. But still, I was more surprised that they found it normal to just randomly say the name of their monarch as a cultural equivalent.

If anything, I'd gotten more questions about the curse words I use than anything else.

As I felt something burning in the back of my head, a fury like no other, I froze. It took me a moment to realize, but everything suddenly felt... quiet. I don't know how to describe it, but it felt as though the world was just a teensy tiny bit heavier. As though the air were thicker and harder to swallow.

I realized rather quickly that these feelings weren't mine. They were of the pony that passed within the recesses of my mind and the cover of my shadow.

"Sir Jeremy... We ask that you do not panic." The alicorn's voice uttered, a chill running down my spine at both her words and the deadly serious tone behind it. I'd seen and dealt with enough cliches to know that when someone tells you that you shouldn't panic, it means there's something that is very much worthy of your panic nearby.

What I heard next proved that old cliche to be more than true.

"Oh, pardon me, my little pony. I do believe you dropped this."

That voice. That same god damn voice. The voice I had only personally heard on a few occasions in the time I had been here in Canterlot.

As my head all but shot to my right, I could see her. A large white alicorn with a rainbow mane trailed slowly behind her in an invisible breeze, smiling down at Halfy as she floated the bit I had dropped in front of her for her to take. A smile that I felt was supposed to be gentle and mother-like on any other occasion. To me though, all it did was make my blood run cold as she looked past Halfy and towards me.

Hiya